The Atlantic

Letters: What’s In a Name?

Readers discuss what it means to adopt a spouse’s last name—or not.
Source: Brendan McDermid / Reuters

Why Don’t More Men Take Their Wives’ Last Names?

In July, Caroline Kitchener wrote about a dilemma many couples face in the run-up to marriage: What is to be done about the last name?


I am one of the statistically insignificant men who did what the article discussed: When we married seven years ago, my wife kept her last name and I took it. Our decision was based on the fact that my wife was well-established in business and did not want to change her name, while I put a premium on family unity and our all having the same last name. So I made the switch.

Although I would do it again, I have to admit it was a very jarring event. I can really relate to women who go through this and have identity issues, because that is what I felt. Plus, the paperwork!

I liked how your article points out that there is really nothing that can be done in this area that is perfectly fair and hassle-free. Even a default where each partner keeps their own last name creates issues down the road.

Having thought about this a bit, and being the

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