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My Egg, My Womb, Your Baby: The Tales of a 3X Traditional Surrogate Mother

My Egg, My Womb, Your Baby: The Tales of a 3X Traditional Surrogate Mother

Автором Dawn Marmorstein

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My Egg, My Womb, Your Baby: The Tales of a 3X Traditional Surrogate Mother

Автором Dawn Marmorstein

Длина:
111 pages
1 hour
Издатель:
Издано:
Aug 10, 2012
ISBN:
9781476117409
Формат:
Книге

Описание

Dawn enjoyed being pregnant so much when she carried her own children that she decided she wanted to help others who were unable to create their own family. After doing some research, Dawn decided that she wanted to become a Traditional Surrogate mother --- both egg donor and surrogate mother -- who would be genetically related to the surrobaby she carried who ultimately destined to be given to another family. While modernly, most surrogacies are gestational surrogacies, where there is a separate egg donor who provides the egg for the carrying surrogate mother, Dawn's journey with traditional surrogacy created three babies related to her, each with her knowledge and consent that two would given to two separate same sex recipients, and one would go to a traditionally married couple.

This book give's Dawn's unique perspective and provides an insider's view of traditional surrogacy based upon each of her three journeys. She writes about what TS entails, beginning with the search for her ideal recipients, and resulting in the birth of three babies who were destined for three families. Unlike Gestational Surrogacy, where an embryo is created at a fertility clinic laboratory, Dawn inseminated herself using sperm sample from a recipient parent and a syringe, which she then inserted inside of herself. She describes what it was like to self-inseminate, as well as writing about the dreaded wait between insemination and confirmation of pregnant.

Her initial and very-time consuming search for her first recipients began online using a website dedicated to matching recipient parents with surrogate mothers. Dawn reveals the difficulty in finding a perfect match, and describes in detail a perspective recipient parent and her mother haggling about mundane details of a potential surrogacy contract inside Dawn's own home, and of meeting a pair of recipients for lunch, where the male recipient was completely disinterested in his wife having a baby which he would raise with her.

Eventually, Dawn meets her ideal recipient #1, with whom she matches, and her journey as a traditional surrogate begins. Dawn's first journey included some unexpected bumps, including a confrontation with a hospital social worker who accuses her of having an affair with the recipient parent (who is gay) and tells Dawn that she can keep a baby that legally belongs to this recipient parent.

Her second surrogacy journey for recipients #2 got off to a shaky start, when Dawn learned shortly after meeting this same sex couple that they planned on moving overseas. The journey became more interesting at a party where a number of her daughter's parents discovered that, just weeks before delivering, Dawn was pregnant with a surrogacy pregnancy which she would not be keeping as her own. This bothered a number of attendees, even though this took place in the liberal city of Los Angeles.

Journey with recipient parents #3, a traditional married couple from another country, also got off to a difficult start. Dawn had travelled to another country for an in-house insemination and was detained by governmental custom officials at the airport upon arrival. These officials did not believe she was visiting to see friends. This journey became more complex when her OB / GYN and ultrasound specialist insisted the baby was huge, resulting in her first C-Section, when in fact the baby's birth weight was only 8 lbs. Finally, although she has maintained relationships with the other two recipients, Dawn has only seen one or two pictures of the third surrobaby, even though the recipients promised they would stay in touch and send pictures regularly.

This book provides an uncanny and candid portrait of the world of traditional surrogacy as seen through the eyes of a traditional surrogate, who knowingly gave three babies biologically related to her to other families.

Издатель:
Издано:
Aug 10, 2012
ISBN:
9781476117409
Формат:
Книге

Об авторе

Dawn Marmorstein was born in Santa Maria, Ca. At age 23 she entered the surrogacy world as a Traditional Surrogate Mother. Dawn went on to carry two more times, then briefly worked at a surrogacy agency before founding Los Angeles Surrogacy Center in 2010 and then San Francisco Surrogacy Center in 2011. She spends her time working for her agencies assisting recipient couples achieve their dreams of parenthood, as well as blogging on a number of different web sites, including "Mommy Loves To Talk" (http://www.mommylovestalking.com) and "Surrobaby #4" (on blogspot.com). Dawn currently resides in Santa Barbara County with her partner, Todd, and their four children.

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My Egg, My Womb, Your Baby - Dawn Marmorstein

My Egg, My Womb, Your Baby:

Tales of a 3X Traditional Surrogate Mother

Published by Dawn Marmorstein at Smashwords

Copyright 2012 Dawn Marmorstein

This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

DEDICATION

To Todd, Kura, Genevieve, Tobias and Markalee: Everything I do is for you. I love and adore each of you more than words can express!

To my Recipient Parents: You all are amazing parents. Without your support, none of the aspects of career would exist! Thank you for being such huge supporters of the agency and I. I love watching your kids grow though social media. It’s the best!

To my Surrogate Children: There is not a day that goes by that I don’t think of you. I enjoyed carrying you around for nine months, and seeing the overwhelming happiness you brought to your parents when you were born. I watch you grow from a distance through social media, and love that each one of you has one distinct genetic characteristic of mine: my nose. I wish each one of you success and all the happiness in the world…Until we meet again some day!

DISCLAIMER

Traditional Surrogacy can be a wonderful way to become a parent, but Traditional Surrogacy is not without its risks and potential complications. These risks and complications can be devastating to the recipient parents should they match with the wrong surrogate mother.

Please do your due diligence in screening your potential surrogate mother, not only her physical heath, but also her emotional and psychological well-being.

Do not attempt Traditional Surrogacy without the assistance of a well-trained reproductive lawyer. It’s crucial that this person guide you through the multitude of often confusing steps involved.

FORWARD

As I reflect upon the current state of the surrogacy industry, I can’t help but wonder how surrogate mothers will be viewed down the road ten years or more. With the advent of reproductive technology, surrogacy now extends to all corners of the world, with the most notorious and high-volume business operations based in India, where surrogate mothers are institutionally-housed and are literally outcasts from society during the time they are pregnant. Many are allegedly performing roles as surrogate mothers against their will, being forced into this job by their husbands or families because of dire financial need.

These surrogates are gestational carriers, having no genetic connection to the baby they are carrying. Each pregnancy was achieved by the use of donor eggs, which is now the primary method of surrogacy now being utilized today in the United States.

In contrast, I have enjoyed a most amazing journey as I myself decided (with the concurrence of my husband) to embark on not one, but three separate adventures, where I was both the egg donor and surrogate mother, better known as a Traditional Surrogate. The surrobabies I helped create with three separate recipient parents now live in locations spanning the world. These recipients are now raising babies that are genetically related to me. Although I am the birth mother to these children, they are being raised as the children of the recipient parents; while two sets of these surrobabies know (or at some point will know) that I am the one who gave birth to them and that they carry my biological properties, the other recipient will likely never divulge this very deep secret to their child. My journeys have resulted in the formation of an unbelievable relationship between myself and the recipient parents, and I thought it was time that I share this story with others. Hence, my decision to write this book.

In it, I chronicle every important (if not anecdotal) aspect of my surrogacy journey. For example, prior to deciding on my first recipient parent, I met with a woman and her mom who came to my house to discuss all the details and expenses relating to surrogacy, and we ended up sitting around my dining room table haggling about such necessities as whether I needed an allowance for maternity clothing. You will also read about one particular surrobirth, where the social worker from this large-city hospital suddenly appeared and began interrogating my recipient parent about whether he and I had an affair. And you will learn that in traditional surrogacy, the insemination process does not always take place in a fertility clinic’s laboratory, but rather using samples of sperm and syringes to inseminate directly into my body.

Not only did my first traditional surrogacy generate more traditional surrogacies, it also spawned my interest in assisting others create their own family. Since I can not be a surrogate mother to every person who needs a surrogate, I decided the next best thing was to form a surrogacy agency to facilitate and oversee surrogacies on behalf of recipient parents. This also meant that I would be responsible for finding and securing surrogate mothers for recipient clients, who themselves would be unable to conveive or carry children on their own. My agency is growing, recipient parents are having babies via surrogacy, and I could not be happier.

I look forward to the day when surrogates in other countries such as India are able to experience surrogacy as I have, and can build relationships with their recipient parents as I have, taking an active role during the course of the surrogacy. I hope that day comes soon.

INTRODUCTION

It all started eight years ago. I was surfing the internet and stumbled upon a website where parents were looking for surrogate mothers to carry their children. At the time, I was 20 years old, the married mother of two children living in San Francisco. I have always been very mature for my age and since becoming an adult, I have been happily living the life of someone twice my age.

I thought to myself, I could carry someone else’s baby! Becoming pregnant was very easy for me and 9 months of pregnancy came and went in a blink of an eye. I have always enjoyed being pregnant. When I was younger, I struggled to maintain my thinner 5′9, 150 lbs body – often times doing things that were extreme… using diet pills, laxatives and excessively exercising. When I became about 4 months pregnant with my first child, I stopped obsessing about being thin and focused on being healthy, which is what I knew was best for my unborn child. Pregnancy was a time where I embraced eating what I wanted, and not worrying about losing weight, which I could easily do afterwards. Pregnancy agreed with my body. I had full breasts and robust hips – things I never had previously. Pregnancy is a time where I have always embraced my body and just relaxed and focused on growing the little person inside of me.

One of the postings on this particular website intrigued me. It was written by a set of recipient parents who happened to live not far away in San Jose. I sent a quick response to their posting, briefly describing myself and explaining why I wanted to be a traditional surrogate mother.

Next came the hard part: convincing my husband, Todd, that this was something we should do. That was challenging. When he came home one day from work, I told him I wanted to become a surrogate. He said, A what? I said, I want to become pregnant and carry someone elses child. Todd said to me, Have you lost your mind??

I said, No.

I then disclosed to him that I sent an email to a couple looking for a surrogate mom, and I told him that I wanted us to think about pursuing this further. He agreed to be open to it. Within hours, the San Jose couple emailed me back and asked if we could speak on the phone. I agreed. We chatted for a half a hour or so, and the woman on the phone said to me, "I want to make sure you understand what type of surrogacy we are looking to do. We

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