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    Sabotage; Recognize Commitment Phobia and Experience a Healthy Relationship
    Sabotage; Recognize Commitment Phobia and Experience a Healthy Relationship
    Sabotage; Recognize Commitment Phobia and Experience a Healthy Relationship
    Ebook158 pages2 hours

    Sabotage; Recognize Commitment Phobia and Experience a Healthy Relationship

    By Johanna Sparrow

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    About this ebook

    Are you on an emotional roller coaster called love? If so you may be dating or loving a commitment phobe, who has no interest in ever committing to you. There is nothing wrong with you, the problem is them.

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherJohanna Sparrow
    Release dateFeb 15, 2015
    ISBN9781310745010
    Sabotage; Recognize Commitment Phobia and Experience a Healthy Relationship
    Author

    Johanna Sparrow

    Antoinette M Watkins writes under the pen name Johanna Sparrow, she has been writing for over 17 years and has published a variety of books from children's books to self-help books dealing with relationship, personal growth and conflict issues. She uses her expertise, knowledge and experience on a system she's created and used over the years dating back as far as 1995 in improving relationship issues, called the (HBCCR)© Heart Bruised Conscious Connection Renewal codes which we either have or don't have inside of us. When she is not writing self help books she writes Novels and Novella under the pen name SPARROW.In 2015 Johanna Sparrow will release for the first time her powerful and inspiring HBCCR system she's created for the rest of the world in hopes that we all can find a common goal or ground within our daily connections. She has researched and studied over the years connections between human to human and human to nature interactions in which she concluded in her research how understanding ones connections and disconnections in life is the essential step code and laws for love, happiness and tragedy, governing and guiding us in becoming life's greatest or worse creation to ever exist.

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    • 5/5
      I read this book as the self-sabotager; as the person with commitment phobia. And you know what? It kinda really sucked to read and see all the ways I am definitely this person. But looking at yourself cirtically is important. This book does seem to have a focus on hetero-monogamous couples, so I couldn't fully relate to things, but I was able to take a lot from this book and really look at myself differently. I know why I am where I am, and I recognise all the ways I have needed to grow. Thanks to this book, as well as other tools such as therapy, I feel like I can start working toward a healthy relationship.

      1 person found this helpful

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    Sabotage; Recognize Commitment Phobia and Experience a Healthy Relationship - Johanna Sparrow

    SABOTAGE

    Recognize Commitment Phobia and Experience a Healthy Relationship

    Smashwords Edition

    Johanna Sparrow

    SABOTAGE, Revised Copyright © 2017 Johanna Sparrow

    All rights reserved. This book, or parts thereof, may not be reproduced in any form without permission from the publisher: exceptions are made for brief excerpts used in published reviews.

    Edited by: ASH THE EDITOR

    www.ashtheeditor.biz

    Cover by: Mila

    www.milagraphicartist.com

    www.johannasparrow.com

    DEDICATION

    I dedicate this book to my loyal readers. Thank you for your support. May this book bless everyone that reads it.

    I Love You to Life!

    CONTENTS

    Foreword

    Introduction

    Are You The One?

    Meet The Parents

    Debilitating Arguments

    The Blame Game

    The Importance of Trust

    Red Flags

    The Lying Game

    Physical Attraction

    Money Faucet

    Mixed Signals

    Can’t Force Commitment

    Think Twice About Remaining Friends

    Talk To Johanna Sparrow

    Foreword

    Many people have been devastated after a broken relationship with a commitment-phobe and become fearful of dating as a result. Are you dating someone who won’t commit to you? Do you question if it’s your fault that you’ve experienced several damaged relationships?

    Failed relationships with commitment-phobes are partially your fault because something within your consciousness causes you to continually attract those type of partners. You must ask yourself why you’re constantly meeting people who’re afraid of commitment?

    Dating and falling in love with a commitment phobic person can leave you angry and confused. Most people that’re in this type of dating cycle have no clue why they continue to end up in that predicament. Commitment-phobes aren’t bad people; they just have a tough time loving someone else.

    Being in loving with a commitment-phobe can make a relationship very stressful. If you don’t want to be in the dark with your partner, you should open your eyes to the person you’re attempting to have a future with. Many commitment-phobes do get married, but their marriages are a living hell. Getting married doesn’t resolve their commitment fears. It only masks them.

    The hearts of those who’re in relationships with commitment-phobes are full of pain and sorrow. It’s no fun living in a nightmare where you love someone more than they love you. A commitment-phobe knows exactly what to say to get what they want. They know how to say things to make you weak in the knees. They always seem to touch your heart by saying the right words at the right moment. You may find yourself caught up in emotion from the sad stories they’ve told you to gain your sympathy. They can sell you anything and would make perfect salespeople. Commitment phobic people may tell you that no one understands them more than you, and you believe them. You end up loving their sense of humor and wittiness.

    Many commitment-phobes are secretive regarding their personal life, they don’t mind telling you their life stories because they’re covered in lies to win you over. While in a relationship with this type of person, nothing seems to be off limits. You talk about anything and have many things in common. It’s true that a commitment-phobe has had many of the same dating horrors as you. That’s why they fear commitment. But they may embellish on the details of their experiences to pull your heart strings.

    In the beginning stages of the relationship, you’re amazed by their words, behaviors, and caring spirit. You want to tell the world about this new person, but it’s too soon. They may be too good to be true. If you want to know if the person you’re dating is genuine, asking the people that’re closest to you may help you accomplish that. Those who are looking from the outside without emotional involvement may be able to spot the true nature of your partner.

    For the most part, family and friends won’t be bamboozled by a commitment-phobe’s sweet words and phony behaviors. Your family may be the last people on earth you want to share your personal business with. Especially if you feel that you’ve met someone special. You have the ability to see the truth, but you could be blinded because you only want to see how amazing, loving, caring, respectful, and trustworthy your partner is.

    By the time you see what everyone else saw long ago, your heart is involved. At that point, you begin to recognize things about that person you didn’t previously notice. The relationship is no longer moving in a positive direction, and your lover is unsure if they want a commitment. The worse part about being in a relationship with a commitment-phobe is that you don’t get the feedback you want when you address their behavior, and you’re left in confusion. It’s never easy to be in a relationship with a commitment phobic partner because you’ll never receive the commitment you’re looking for.

    Wouldn’t it be nice if people had descriptions of what they’re looking for in a relationship stamped on their forehead. Dating would be so much easier!

    Commitment-phobes are innate liars, and you could fall apart while searching for the truth. Once you’ve experienced a someone that fears commitment, you’ll never be the same. You’ll be able to detect deceptiveness much better going forward. You may even put up a guard so that no one can ever lie or hurt you again. But be careful not to become commitment phobic yourself. Dating is never easy because you must learn to trust someone that you don’t know, and that can be pretty scary if you’ve been hurt a few times.

    I’ll show you signs to look for when dating a commitment-phobe so you can stop being a victim in your relationship. I’ll teach you how to detect and understand the behaviors of a commitment-phobe, which’ll help you be a winner at the game of love.

    Introduction

    My experiences in dealing with commitment-phobes that never commit despite trying to convince you that they will is what inspired me to write about this topic. Finding a person who understands you and vibes with you is what you’re looking for. Despite that, you continue to attract commitment-phobes.

    What signals are you sending that catches the eye of people with commitment phobia? If you’ve found yourself in another relationship with someone who convinced you they wanted a relationship but later displayed the signs of having commitment issues, you must check yourself to see if you are radiating an energy that appeals to them.

    Face it, sometimes we want love so urgently that we settle for someone just because they looked our way. Some people change relationships like they change underwear without understanding what they’re getting into. Are you more in love with the idea of being in love instead of actually finding a compatible person that’ll love you? Why do you keep trying to make relationships work with commitment-phobes? What’s the big rush on love?

    Take your time when dating as to not rush into a relationship. That’ll prevent you from being filled with regret later. Someone that claims to love you should never lie, humiliate you, or intentionally cause you pain. If you’re not looking for a commitment, still approach dating with caution so that you don’t haphazardly become emotionally attached to a commitment-phobe.

    I have friends that fell in love with commitment-phobes when a relationship was the last thing on their minds. They suffered hurt and found it hard to get out of a relationship that they weren’t looking for. You can imagine how much more heartbroken someone that’s actually looking for love would be. You can imagine how much harder it’d be to leave that relationship.

    Commitment-phobes have no problem faking their feelings to persuade you to give them your heart. While in a relationship, their actions can be very dangerous. Your relationship with a commitment phobic partner is doomed from the start, but you may not realize it until the relationship is on its last leg; or until they’ve decided to leave. Commitment-phobes have no problem breaking hearts and causing chaos in your life. After you’ve seen past the charade, you’ll never forget that experience and you’ll never want it to happen again.

    Most people overcome the pain of past relationships and move on. Commitment-phobes don’t. Their fear of heartbreak and abandonment keeps them from giving you the one thing you want—their heart.

    Then, there’re functioning commitment-phobes that’ve mastered the art of going the extra mile by staying in a long-term relationship or getting married. These charades are in place to make you believe in them. Don’t be fooled because they’re still afraid of love and commitment. Long-term relationships and marriages with commitment phobic partners are plagued with more problems than other relationships because of irrational fear that clouds the commitment-phobe’s judgment. Due to this, they’ll never completely let you in.

    You probably know what attributes you’re looking for in someone you want to commit to. But do you know what characteristics signify a commitment-phobe? As you search for someone to be an integral part of your life, be aware that at the same time, a commitment-phobe is also looking for someone they can deceive.

    There were certainly several signs that your partner had a fear of commitment, but you missed or overlooked them because you wanted the relationship to work. Did they start unnecessary arguments? Did they you keep you in a state of confusion? Were your words twisted to make you look like the villain? Did you catch them in lies repeatedly? Did they ask you to abandon your friends or family for the sake of the relationship?

    Those are some of the red flags that should’ve alerted you to your partner’s attempts at sabotaging the relationship. A commitment-phobe is a relationship manipulator. They use your desire to settle down as a weapon to control you. I was a victim of relationship sabotaging tactics

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