You 2.0: When Did Marriage Become So Hard?

FromHidden Brain

Start listening View podcast show

You 2.0: When Did Marriage Become So Hard?

FromHidden Brain

ratings:

Length:

49 minutes

Released:

Aug 13, 2018

Format:

Podcast episode

Description

There are signs it's getting even harder. In this episode, we explore how long-term relationships have changed over time and whether we might be able to improve marriage by asking less of it.

Released:

Aug 13, 2018

Format:

Podcast episode

Titles in the series (100)

Shankar Vedantam uses science and storytelling to reveal the unconscious patterns that drive human behavior, shape our choices and direct our relationships.

Skip carousel

Episode 1: Switchtracking by Hidden Brain
28 min listen
Episode 6: The Science of Fear by Hidden Brain
20 min listen
Welcome to the Hidden Brain Podcast by Hidden Brain
1 min listen
Episode 13: Terrorism by Hidden Brain
26 min listen
Episode 10: Thanksgiving by Hidden Brain
19 min listen
Hidden Brain: A Sneak Peek by Hidden Brain
6 min listen
Episode 2: Near Victories by Hidden Brain
22 min listen
Episode 8: Back Up Plans by Hidden Brain
24 min listen
Encore of Episode 16: Misbehaving by Hidden Brain
24 min listen
Episode 15: Loss and Renewal by Hidden Brain
25 min listen
Brain Bonus: Magic Brain by Hidden Brain
5 min listen
Encore of Episode 9: Aziz Ansari on Modern Love by Hidden Brain
26 min listen
Episode 12: Humor by Hidden Brain
20 min listen
Episode 7: Lonely Hearts by Hidden Brain
33 min listen
Episode 4: Students and Teachers by Hidden Brain
18 min listen
Episode 26: Grit by Hidden Brain
28 min listen
Episode 3: Stereotype Threat by Hidden Brain
22 min listen
Episode 5: Compassion by Hidden Brain
18 min listen
Encore of Episode 7: Lonely Hearts by Hidden Brain
33 min listen
Episode 9: Aziz Ansari on Modern Love by Hidden Brain
26 min listen
Encore of Episode 3: Stereotype Threat by Hidden Brain
22 min listen
Encore of Episode 11: Forgery by Hidden Brain
23 min listen
Episode 29: Traffic by Hidden Brain
16 min listen
Episode 17: Resolutions by Hidden Brain
21 min listen
Episode 11: Forgery by Hidden Brain
23 min listen
Episode 14: Christmas by Hidden Brain
21 min listen
Encore of Episode 2: Near Victories by Hidden Brain
22 min listen
Episode 30: WOOP, There It Is by Hidden Brain
18 min listen
Episode 19: Dating and Mating by Hidden Brain
22 min listen
Episode 16: Misbehaving by Hidden Brain
23 min listen

More Episodes from Hidden Brain

Skip carousel

Parents: Keep Out!: If you're a parent or a teacher, you've probably wondered how to balance play and safety for the kids in your care. You don't want to put children in danger, but you also don't want to rob them of the joy of exploration. This week, we talk with psychologist Peter Gray about how this balance has changed — for parents and children alike — and what we can do about it. by Hidden Brain
54 min listen
The Curious Science of Cravings: We've all had those days when all we want is a little treat. Maybe it's a bag of chips, an ice cream sundae or a glass of wine. But sometimes, these desires become all-consuming. This week on the show, psychiatrist Judson Brewer helps us understand the science of cravings, and how we should respond to them. by Hidden Brain
49 min listen
What Is Normal?: Anthropologist Tom Pearson was devastated after his daughter Michaela was diagnosed with Down syndrome. When he began to examine that emotional response, he found himself wrestling with questions that have roiled his field for decades. Early anthropologists would often compare people of different backgrounds and abilities, asking questions like: How is one group different from another? Which one is stronger or smarter? And how do we understand people who don’t fit our expectations? This week, we talk with Pearson about his family’s story, and the evolution of our thinking on disability and difference. by Hidden Brain
51 min listen
The Transformative Ideas of Daniel Kahneman: If you've ever taken an economics class, you were probably taught that people are rational. But about 50 years ago, the psychologists Daniel Kahneman and Amos Tversky began to chip away at this basic assumption. In doing so, they transformed our understanding of human behavior. This week, we remember Kahneman, who recently died at the age of 90, by revisiting our 2018 and 2021 conversations with him. by Hidden Brain
98 min listen
Are You Listening?: Have you ever sat across from your spouse, colleague or friend and realized that while they may be hearing what you're saying, they aren't actually listening? Poor listening can lead to arguments, hurt feelings, and fractured relationships. But the good news is that active, thoughtful listening can profoundly benefit both people in the conversation. This week on the show, psychologist Guy Itzchakov helps us understand where interactions go awry, and how to become a more attentive listener. by Hidden Brain
50 min listen
$Are You Listening?: Have you ever sat across from your spouse, colleague or friend and realized that while they may be hearing what you're saying, they aren't actually listening? Poor listening can lead to arguments, hurt feelings, and fractured relationships. But the good news is that active, thoughtful listening can profoundly benefit both people in the conversation. This week on the show, psychologist Guy Itzchakov helps us understand where interactions go awry, and how to become a more attentive listener.$
The Ventilator: Many of us believe we know how we’d choose to die. We have a sense of how we’d respond to a diagnosis of an incurable illness. This week, we revisit a 2019 episode featuring one family’s decades-long conversation about dying. What they found is that the people we are when death is far in the distance may not be the people we become when death is near. by Hidden Brain
50 min listen
Escaping the Matrix: A little more than a decade ago, researchers began tracking an alarming trend: a dramatic uptick in anxiety and depression among young Americans. Psychologist Jonathan Haidt, like many other researchers, says the increase is related to our use of social media and devices. But he believes it’s also deeper than that — connected to our deepest moral beliefs and how they shape the way we view the world. He says there are simple steps we can take to improve the mental health of kids growing up in the smartphone era. by Hidden Brain
50 min listen
Fear Less: Fear is a normal and healthy response to things that may harm us. But fear can also hold us back from doing the things we want to do. This week, we talk to psychiatrist and neuroscientist Arash Javanbakht about the psychology of fear — how it helps us, how it hurts us, and what we can do to harness it. by Hidden Brain
52 min listen
US 2.0: Lincoln's Dilemma: Over the past few weeks, we've been exploring the psychology of partisanship, and how to effectively handle disagreements with those around us. This week, we conclude our US 2.0 series by turning to the past. We’ll explore how one of the most important leaders in American history — Abraham Lincoln — grappled with the pressing moral question of his time. When, if ever, is it worth compromising your own principles for the sake of greater progress? by Hidden Brain
52 min listen
US 2.0: Not at the Dinner Table: We typically divide the country into two distinct groups: Democrats and Republicans. But what if the real political divide in our country isn’t between “left” and “right”? What if it’s between those who care intensely about politics, and those who don’t? This week, we bring you a favorite 2020 conversation with political scientist Yanna Krupnikov, who offers an alternative way to understand Americans’ political views. by Hidden Brain
49 min listen
US 2.0: Living With Our Differences: Conflicts are inevitable — both at a global scale and in our personal lives. This week, in the latest in our US 2.0 series, psychologist Peter Coleman explains how minor disagreements turn into major rifts, and how we can defuse even the most salient of disputes in our lives. by Hidden Brain
53 min listen
US 2.0: Win Hearts, Then Minds: There's a saying that's attributed to the Dalai Lama: in the practice of tolerance, one's enemy is the best teacher. It's a nice idea, but in reality, when people don't share our values, it's hard for us to tolerate theirs. This week, we talk with sociologist Robb Willer about the common mistakes we make in trying to persuade others of our point of view — and how we can break out of our echo chambers. by Hidden Brain
49 min listen
US 2.0: What We Have In Common: The United States, we’re told, is increasingly a house divided. Conservatives and progressives are so alienated from each other that conversation is virtually impossible. But are we really as divided as we’re led to believe? As we begin what promises to be a pivotal election season, we're kicking off a new series about how we form our political beliefs. We're calling it "US 2.0." We begin with psychologist Kurt Gray, who studies how we think about our political allies and opponents — and how these insights can help us to chart a new path forward. by Hidden Brain
51 min listen
Are Your Memories Real?: We rely on our memory to understand the world. But what if our memories aren't true? This week, we talk to psychologist Elizabeth Loftus about the malleability of memory — what we remember, and what we think we remember. by Hidden Brain
50 min listen
Finding Focus: We spend more and more of our lives staring at screens. Our cellphones, smartwatches and laptops allow us to communicate instantly with people across the globe, and quickly look up obscure facts. But our digital devices are also altering our brains in profound ways. This week, psychologist Gloria Mark explores how our ability to focus is shrinking, and offers ways to protect our minds in a world filled with endless distractions. by Hidden Brain
48 min listen
Where Do Feelings Come From?: Most of us feel that our emotions are reactions to those outside of us. Someone cuts us off in traffic, and we say that the other driver made us upset. A friend brings over food when we're sick, and we say the friend offered us comfort. But psychologist and neuroscientist Lisa Feldman Barrett argues that our feelings are not, in fact, responses to the world — they're really predictions about the world. And she says we can exercise more control over those predictions than we realize. by Hidden Brain
50 min listen
Making the Most of Your Mistakes: When we're learning, or trying new things, mistakes are inevitable. Some of these mistakes provide us with valuable information, while others are just harmful. This week, we kick off the new year with researcher Amy Edmondson, who explains the difference between constructive failures and those we should try to avoid. by Hidden Brain
52 min listen
What Would Socrates Do?: Humans have wrestled with questions about identity and purpose for millennia. So it’s no surprise that the insights of people who lived hundreds or even thousands of years ago have stood the test of time. This week, philosopher Tamar Gendler explores how three great thinkers from ancient Greece understood the human psyche, and what we can still learn from their wisdom today. by Hidden Brain
50 min listen
How to Believe in Yourself: When was the last time you set a goal and struggled to reach it? Perhaps you're trying to write a novel but can't seem to get started. Or maybe you want to master a sport, but you keep making the same mistakes over and over again. This week, organizational psychologist Adam Grant guides us through the science of human potential, and teaches us how to uncover our own abilities. by Hidden Brain
50 min listen
The Ugly Side of Beauty: We like to tell kids, “Don’t judge a book by its cover.” But from a very early age, we humans are doing just that — judging others based on how they look. This week, we bring you the second part of our look at the science of beauty and talk with psychologists Vivian Zayas and Stefanie Johnson about how appearances can often lead us astray. by Hidden Brain
51 min listen
The Mystery of Beauty: Think about the last time you were struck by a gorgeous painting in a museum, or heard a song that brought you to tears. All of us know what it’s like to be stopped in our tracks by a beautiful sight. But scientists are still puzzling over why this is the case. What’s the point of beauty? Why is it seemingly so important to us? This week on the show, neuroscientist Anjan Chatterjee explains the function of beauty in our daily lives. Then, Nobel laureate Frank Wilczek describes how beauty served a purpose in some of the biggest scientific breakthroughs of our time. by Hidden Brain
49 min listen
Healing 2.0: The Power of Apologies: Why is it so hard to say 'I'm sorry?' In the final episode of our Healing 2.0 series, we talk with psychologist Tyler Okimoto about the mental barriers that keep us from admitting when we've done something wrong, as well as the transformative power of apologies by Hidden Brain
50 min listen
Healing 2.0: Disrupting Death: In 2019, Justin Harrison's mom was diagnosed with terminal cancer. But by the time she died, he had figured out how to keep a part of her alive...forever. This week, the strange and provocative story of a man who believes that grief is not inevitable — that we can, in a way, cheat death. by Hidden Brain
53 min listen
Healing 2.0: Life After Loss: You've probably heard that people who lose a loved one may go through what are known as the "five stages" of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. But many people find that their grief doesn't follow this model at all. In the latest installment of our Healing 2.0 series, we revisit our 2022 conversation with resilience researcher Lucy Hone. Lucy shares the techniques she learned to cope after a devastating loss in her own life. by Hidden Brain
49 min listen
Healing 2.0: What We Gain from Pain: We’ve all heard the saying, “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.” But is there any truth to this idea? This week, we explore the concept of post-traumatic growth with psychologist Eranda Jayawickreme. He finds that pain can have benefits — but not necessarily the ones we expect. by Hidden Brain
49 min listen
Healing 2.0: Change Your Story, Change Your Life: We all tell stories about ourselves, often without realizing we’re doing so. How we frame those stories can profoundly shape our lives. In the kickoff episode to our monthlong series on healing, psychologist Jonathan Adler shares how to tell our stories in ways that enhance our wellbeing. by Hidden Brain
55 min listen
The Enemies of Gratitude: One of the mysteries of human behavior is that it’s often easier for us to focus on what’s going wrong than on what’s going right in our lives. Why is that? Psychologist Thomas Gilovich studies the barriers that prevent us from feeling gratitude, and how we can overcome them. by Hidden Brain
50 min listen
Follow the Anomalies: As we move through our lives, we have to make decisions both big and small. Some are banal: What will I eat for breakfast today? Should I drive or bike to work? Others are more complicated: How much should I contribute to my 401k? What career should I pursue? Today on the show, behavioral economist Richard Thaler explains why our decision making is often far more nuanced than economic models would suggest. Today on the show, behavioral economist Richard Thaler explains why we make the decisions we do, and why they often aren't the most rational. by Hidden Brain
49 min listen
How to Spot a Scam: We like to think that con artists only prey upon the weak, or gullible. But psychologist Dan Simons says all of us can fall victim to scams, because the best scammers know how to take advantage of our biases and blindspots. by Hidden Brain
52 min listen
Escaping Perfectionism: Perfectionism is everyone’s favorite flaw. It’s easy to assume that our push to be perfect is what leads to academic, athletic, and professional success. But psychologist Thomas Curran says perfectionism has a dark side, and that there are much healthier ways to strive for excellence. by Hidden Brain
53 min listen

Related podcast episodes

Skip carousel

Episode 149: Training for Divorce by Becoming Something with Jonathan Pokluda
38 min listen
You 2.0: When Did Marriage Become So Hard? by Hidden Brain
50 min listen
#113: Why Your Partner Doesn't Want to Work on Your Relationship by Love Shack Live: Helping Couples Rescue Their Relationships
57 min listen
72: Date Nights and Scoring "Home Runs" with Kate and Eric MacDougall: How does your current marriage dynamic help or hinder intimacy? Are you good at expressing your desires within your marriage? How does growing into your best version of yourself translate into a deeper connection with your spouse? And how can these... by Get Your Marriage On! with Dan Purcell
36 min listen
Episode 45: Drawing Boundaries Around a Spouse's Bad Behaviour by Bare Marriage
42 min listen
Stop the fighting - dealing with relationship conflict by The Relationship Maze
27 min listen
341: STOP THOSE OLD, COMFORTABLE AND INEFFECTIVE PATTERNS: "Marriage doesn’t have the power to bind-only the actions of two people can do that. Forever and happy endings aren’t a given." —Leah Mercer - You can make changes to your marriage no matter how long you've been married. - by ONE Extraordinary Marriage Show
32 min listen
288: GuyTalk: What dating is like after getting divorced by Dear Men: How to Rock Sex, Dating, and Relationships With Women
73 min listen
Pulling Out a Chair for God at Your Marriage Table by Porn, Betrayal, Sex and the Experts — PBSE
42 min listen
Why We Fall Out of Love (and What to Do About It): Long term relationships can get a little stale when you don’t know how to keep love alive over the long haul. It’s very common for couples to believe they’ve when this happens. But a stronger, more fulfilling relationship is possible, and on... by Love, Happiness and Success with Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby
54 min listen
Steps to Work Through a Hard Season in a Marriage: Episode 291: You know that conflicts will happen in a marriage, this truth should not be resisted or avoided. However what if that same conflict comes up again and what if that turns into a pattern that shows up over and over again? This is what creates a hard... by EmPowered Couples with The Freemans
26 min listen
Brutally Honest Feedback For the Wives + Women to Have a Better Relationship: Episode 273: This episode provides bold reminders for the women to make positive changes in the relationship. It’s easy to find ourselves unconsciously acting in ways that aren’t our best, which can deplete and diminish the love in the relationship. This... by EmPowered Couples with The Freemans
24 min listen
Episode 21 - How Can We Have Healthy Relationships With Our In-Laws?: More Than Roommates by More than Roommates
26 min listen
370: CHANGE STARTS WITH ME: "Being vulnerable is not a sign of weakness rather it is a sign of strength. It takes courage to let others into your world." —Anonymous - As a couple you may be stuck. - You may be stuck in the same routines. - by ONE Extraordinary Marriage Show
32 min listen
Episode 60 - What Does Healthy Commitment Look Like in Marriage?: More Than Roommates by More than Roommates
28 min listen
What's The Score: Discover the damaging effects of keeping score in your marriage in this episode. We discuss the negative impact of tallying up wins and losses, and how it can erode trust, communication, and intimacy between partners. Gain a fresh perspective on why... by REALationships Podcast
49 min listen
#121: The Truth About Trying to Fix Your Partner by Love Shack Live: Helping Couples Rescue Their Relationships
54 min listen
Giving and Receiving: How to Create a Balanced Relationship (In & Out of the Bedroom): Relationships are a two-way street, we’re supposed to give and we receive, but what do you do if you’re doing all the giving? Emotionally, mentally and sexually, women often find themselves giving but not receiving, and we have... by the SEX podcast
13 min listen
44. What Changed When We Got Married by Connected And Committed
38 min listen
Requests vs Demands: In this episode you will learn the difference between a request and a demand. You might think you already know the difference, listen anyway. Really understanding how often we make demands instead of requests in our relationships will help make... by The Marriage Life Coach Podcast
9 min listen
Balance at Home: The Crucial Link Between Household Duties and Marital Satisfaction: In this episode, we delve into the often underestimated yet critical impact that the division of household duties has on the satisfaction and longevity of marriages. Join us as we explore real-life stories, and research findings that shed light on how... by REALationships Podcast
50 min listen
How To Forgive A Cheating Wife (or Husband) by Relationship Radio: Marriage, Sex, Limerence & Avoiding Divorce
47 min listen
Your Past is Not Fixed, You Can Change It: ADVANCED Aaron Solo Episode 128: You have heard it said that your past is in the past, or some version of don't cry over spilled milk. So of course that means there is nothing you can do about it right? What if we told you that your past is not fixed? What if you could actually... by EmPowered Couples with The Freemans
21 min listen
The Breakdown is Right Before the Breakthrough: Episode 248: This episode is a dose of motivation and perspective change for your marriage and life. Book a Relationship Breakthrough Session with us. This is a private 2-on-2 session to overcome any challenge you’re facing as a couple. by EmPowered Couples with The Freemans
9 min listen
35. Relationship History Lessons: They say history is bound to repeat itself and the same can be said for relationships. If you don’t acknowledge what has happened in the past, can you truly look forward to a better future for your relationship? In this episode, by Give It To Me Straight
70 min listen
A New Chapter of Love: Exploring Sleep Divorce and Post-Divorce Growth by The Ugly Truth Of Divorce with Samantha Boss and Leah Marie
22 min listen
How We View Difficulties With Others: The perspective with which we view difficulties in a relationship significantly determines the outcome of these challenges. Instead of seeing difficulties as insurmountable obstacles, viewing them as opportunities for growth, learning, and deeper... by In Your Right Mind with Monique Rhodes
9 min listen
5 | How To Not Grow Apart In Your Relationship by It Takes 2 Podcast
51 min listen
Stop Comparing + interview with "COMMITTED"! by For The Girl
36 min listen
Goodness - Fruit of the Spirit Mini Episode 6: More Than Roommates by More than Roommates
12 min listen

Discover this podcast and so much more

You 2.0: When Did Marriage Become So Hard?

You 2.0: When Did Marriage Become So Hard?

Description

Titles in the series (100)

More Episodes from Hidden Brain

Related podcast episodes