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Master Reset
Автором J. Mclaurin
Описание
Master Reset is one example of turning pain into purpose, believing that you can do all that you’ve dreamt about with a disability. When reading this book, the readers get a glimpse into the past, present, and future of a survivor. The ups, downs, and navigation through a narrow terrain filled with a lot of fear and a lot of “nos.” Also, you will discover that there is a light at the end of the tunnel and the sun will shine again. The matter of being disabled, mind versus body, and a complete lifestyle change are all topics that Master Reset will address for the curiosity of the readers. Exploring this type of material will generate a healthy conversation that is informative to the readers about brain injuries and the wonders of our beautifully complexed brains.
A such thing as “master reset” applies to every human from all walks of life in any situation, it is simply a restart to do something over, if possible, with hopes of doing it greater than the initial attempt.
I’m elated and grateful to be able to share my Master Reset journey.
J. McLaurin
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Master Reset - J. Mclaurin
Master Reset
J. Mclaurin
Copyright © 2020 J. Mclaurin
All rights reserved
First Edition
Fulton Books, Inc.
Meadville, PA
Published by Fulton Books 2020
ISBN 978-1-64654-375-5 (paperback)
ISBN 978-1-64654-376-2 (digital)
Printed in the United States of America
Table of Contents
Life as I Once Knew It
When Illness Struck
Misdiagnosed, Confused, and Delusional
Illness Returned with a Vengeance
Chemotherapy
I Lost It All
Counseling
Owning My Illness
Life Is Not Over
Thank God for My Brain Injury
In loving memory of Shvette Cora
Williams (November 29, 1965–June 16, 2017), Desean Shawny
McDonald (July 31, 1993–May 13, 2018), and Horace Poppa
Lambert (May 11, 1935–October 5, 2019).
Chapter 1
Life as I Once Knew It
Hi, my name is Jamal Mc Laurin, and I am an acquired brain injury survivor; 2017 was the year it all went awry. The life I once knew and accustomed to was flipped upside down, never to return upright ever again. Prior to all the trauma I faced, I was your typical young man. I was a seemly healthy and independent man working my career job trying to keep my head above water. I thought I was the master of my destiny, working and traveling, living the life I always dreamed about as a kid. I was a very responsible person all my life as far as I could recall, and once others took notice, they would utilize it to their advantage.
Loyal to a fault, I almost always obliged because I was a very giving and caring person. At first I didn’t mind because to be honest, it made me feel accepted, loved, and adored. I was born in the late eighties, raised in the nineties, and the world wasn’t calling tormenting bullying in those days, but that’s what I faced daily. I didn’t quite understand why me and I did not care enough to understand, but because of that, I was all about family. I wanted my entire family to be a united force that was strong and solid in hopes that one day we would be untouchable. My family was my first everything; they loved and supported me regardless, so what I was missing from my peers I received more than enough from them. My mom recognized that I was special, so she made sure I knew how to take up for myself and also how to ignore mean kids who found pleasure in hurting others like myself.
I found solace in my mom and two brothers, they were my world. Our mom did everything for us, so when I became a man, I vowed to honor her by any means.
Eventually, I grew up and became the man I wanted to be—plus my popularity was booming over the years; my stand my ground
attitude and flamboyant style rendered me tons of friends. The days of ridicule for me were over, and people were actually giving me my respect even though it wasn’t needed. I was all about family. If anyone that I loved needed me for anything, I would do it with no hesitation. After all I felt, I owed them that for loving me the way that they did. I was the responsible one and dependable one of the crew. I wore it with pride because all I ever wanted was to help the family that always had my back. Never seen the harm in it until it became a problem and I became ill. My normal pre-sickness life was as such; I would go to work, contribute to family as needed, and attempt to have some sort of social life. Growing up wasn’t such an easy task for me. When you’ve been misjudged and mistreated just based on what society suspects you may or may not be, you can’t wait to grow up. My desire to be an adult was not about being able to do what I wanted without needing the permission of my parents, but for people like me, it was about creating a new reality for myself better than the one I had.
I went hard to make things better for me. I applied an extreme amount of pressure to control my now.
I personally feel like I didn’t truly get to live in my teens and my early twenties. I accepted responsibility at a young age. I was arguably very instrumental in the progression of some people’s rise; however, my life was stagnant. Although I was elated for them, I couldn’t help but wonder what would become of me. I longed to have a proud moment for myself. I was so calculated and robotic there was no excitement in my life. I was all about family to the point I put family