Mr.

Mulcahy Year 10 MYP English Chien He Wong

Discuss the relationship between Jack and his mother, Rosemary.

Do you think that Rosemary is a good mother to Jack? Provide at
least three examples from the memoir that support your answer.

Rosemary is the mother of ‘Jack’; the latter a sobriquet adopted by Tobias

Wolff during his adolescence. In the memoir This Boy’s Life she is
portrayed as a prominent figure to him, harboring only good intentions for
her son— the manner in which she is documented suggests that Jack is
aware of this and that he reciprocates her love. Intention and their care for
one another do not qualify her as a ‘good mother’ though: her attitude
towards him distorts her logic, and because of this she makes emotion-
induced judgment fallacies that are detrimental to Wolff despite her
genuine well-meaning.

A prime example of this would be her refusal to either verbally or

physically reprimand him, regardless the circumstance. Having been
subject to domestic abuse as a child, Rosemary does not punish or lecture
Jack in fear of inflicting upon him the same internal scarring her father did
unto her. Her paranoia is, while partially justified, harmful to Jack as an
individual, causing him to be without discipline. His lack of discipline and
her refusal to reprimand him manifest themselves in the debacle where
Jack and an accomplice steal gasoline from Mr. Welch: she does not scold
him, but instead begs for his cause (for him to stay at the Bolgers’ house).
An even more extreme exemplification of this would be when Jack defaces
the school toilet wall by scrawling profanities upon it. Rosemary refuses to
believe that he would do such a thing, and when Jack denies responsibility,
she says “if he says he didn’t do it, he didn’t do it!” (Wolff p.79) despite
two witnesses testifying that he did indeed do it. When confronted with
this near-certain truth, she still maintains that Jack is innocent for the sake
of not having to reprimand him. Even though one may empathize with her
childhood and her subsequent cautious stance, it is undeniable that in this
aspect of her maternal responsibilities she fails: her lenient policies leave
Jack without the concept of action-reaction and he suffers because of this,
as evidenced by his poorly oriented moral compass and his provoking of
Arthur, the latter of which results in a brutal fight.
Mr. Mulcahy Year 10 MYP English Chien He Wong

Her adamant refusal to punish Jack is intertwined with another chronic

parental issue: her failure to establish and assert herself as an authority. A
rather symbolic depiction of this would be the Winchester .22 Rifle
incident; although Rosemary initially objects to having her son acquire a
functional weapon, she revises her decision after he whines for ‘a few
days’ (24). Jack then transforms the weapon into a medium through which
he channels his escapist nature— suffering when these fantasies become
compulsive and tempting to realize. He eventually succumbs to his
fantasies, shooting and killing a squirrel, and is greatly tormented by his
own actions. Rosemary ought to have identified the rifle as a potential
catalyst for Jack’s growing desire for ‘sovereignty’ and ‘control’—perhaps
she did not even know, which would connote even worse parental skills—
and remained impassive. Regardless, her conscious decision to let Jack
interact unsupervised with a gun (an epitome of ‘typical’ violence) will
suffice: in the second criteria she fails because of her incapability to assert
authority, allowing her better judgment to be swayed.

Rosemary per se is also of hindrance to the development of Jack as an

individual. Her unconventional, fluctuating love life renders his early years
to be chaotic and without the stable environment he so craves. For
example, her volatile relationships have caused him many a nightmare,
where he ‘slept badly’ due to the absence of a suitable partner for his
mother. Her attraction to men who utilize violence is also an element to
consider: the psychological trauma Roy has probably inflicted upon Jack is
absolutely undesirable. Although Rosemary recognizes and attempts to
rectify this crisis by marrying Dwight, her plan ultimately fails.

In conclusion, Rosemary can be classified as a bad mother due to her lack

of disciplinary policies, incapability to assert authority and inability to
provide a stable life. The relationship between mother and son is much
more complex than what prose and systematic evaluation can capture
though: we must acknowledge the existence of minute variables we have
not taken into account, and realize that the actual mother-son relationship
constitutes more of being a ‘good mother’ that that of its symptoms.
Tobias Wolff has flourished as a person, becoming a notable figure in
Mr. Mulcahy Year 10 MYP English Chien He Wong

literature and the academia— probably with the help of a certain

someone.