Teague 1 Parenting Affect On Child Identity It is true; every person feels like their family has directly affected

them in some way. After all, we grow up in our parents household, we live by their rules, we go to their church, we eat their food, watch their TV channels, and we watch everything they do. There is no doubt that this has some physiological affect on people, but what is it? What kind of affect does a persons family have on their identity? According to Aubyn S. Fulton there are four types of identity statuses in this world (2). The first two are the immature stages of development with undeveloped commitments and differed exploration. The first is diffusion. Diffusion is when people are not exploring and have no real commitments. The second is foreclosed (2). Foreclosed is a person who has not started exploring yet, but they have made a commitment. This commitment is normally to an identity alternative offered by an authority figure such as a parent or guardian. The third is moratorium; which are those who are currently exploring but still have no commitments (2). Moratorium is a stepping-stone towards a mature identity status. The fourth and final type is the achieved, which is the most mature status. The achieved are those who have made an exploration out of which has revealed a commitment. Basically, this reflects a healthy outcome of the adolescent identity crisis (2). I have seen each of these stages first hand and feel that, at the moment, I can relate to moratorium because I am still exploring. As mentioned earlier, we grow up in the church that our family attends. The instant I could begin to read and write I was instantly presented with a belief system and I was too young to oppose. As I got older opposing forces that pulled me away from my commitments challenged my belief system. It was not until then that I actually

Teague 2 discovered what I truly believed. Unfortunately, many people are born without a belief system. Their parents teach them that it does not really matter and they are left with a lot of unanswered questions involving the purpose of life in general. There is no doubt this has to leave some sort of void in peoples lives bringing me to the second part of my question. How does the family belief system affect identity? Aubyn S. Fulton goes on in his article to explain whether or not religion is important in a persons identity. Aubyn found through very few old religious studies that frequent church attendance correlated directly with interpersonal foreclosure and ideological achievements (2). However, many other studies showed that there was little to no affiliation with identity and religion. This definitely contradicts the many books written about religious paradigms, including The Seven Habits of A Highly Effective Person. This was a book that I was required to read for ENGR. 1201. Even this book touched on the paradigm of religion and its correlation with basic morals. After reading this I discover that there are is one thing that is similar in nearly every religion and that is good morals. All in all, I think that when a family is very involved in church it affects the child in one of two ways. The child will be susceptible to believe everything he/she hears and be committed to his/her belief system or the child will experience the cramming religion down my throat experience and resent the belief system he/she has been presented with. I have seen it happen both ways in my own church. It all depends on how the family goes about relating their ides to their children. To further discuss how family affects the moral identities of their children, it is important to first understand what moral identity is. Moral identity is a commitment to lines of action advancing or protecting the welfare of others that is consistent with ones

Teague 3 sense of self and reflects healthy adaptation and contribution to the welfare of communities (Hart 1). Daniel Hart goes on to oppose my previous statement and claims that religion, in fact, does not contribute to ones moral identity (2). Instead, personality and social influence make up ones moral identity. Those who are able to interact effectively and regulate their emotions are more likely to have strong moral identities (Hart 2). By social influence, Hart means the environment at home. Households with high levels of parent/child joint activities and knowledgeable parental identification have children with high levels of moral identity. As mentioned before that moral identity relies heavily on a persons concern towards the welfare of others, there has been a correlation between community service and moral identity. Those who volunteer more often are said to have a stronger moral identity. A study was performed in the mid 1900s called the National Longitudinal Survey of Youth or (NLSY) (Hart 377). Many factors were involved in this survey including family income, gender, age, race, reading skills, involvement in extra curricular, parent activity, parent love, etc. This study found that there were four factors that contributed to community service. These factors include family income, gender, ethnicity, and higher levels of academic achievement (Hart 380). To some people this may seem unfair, as if this study is saying that those who are of a certain race, make a certain amount of money, and score high enough on test have better morals. I do not take these results very seriously, however, it is interesting to think about. As Hart touched on the subject of social life related to moral identity another similar author named Linda Juang is in complete agreeance. The key mechanism for developing identity is through interaction with others, first family, then community

Teague 4 (Juang). The main role of parents is to first shape the childs identity and then in later life parents should support, challenge, accept and protest the childs identity. According to Juang it is the emerging college kids that have the hardest time with identity because they are presented with so many different types of cultures and experiences that influence their development. Every college kid can relate to this including me. When I first moved into college I had no clue what I was doing and how to deal with the different types of people I was meeting. There are a lot of people in school that I did not get along with but I quickly learned that I was the problem not them. All these different morals, lifestyles, and religions were thrown at me and I did not know that I was simply going through identity formation. All of the influences have an affect on teens causing them to be more aware of their own culture and ethnicity. This brings me to the point of ethnic development identity. Around this time of adulthood it is important that parents take the time to teach their kids about cultural and racial socialization considering their child is about to be thrown into an ocean of different kinds of people (Juang). Racial socialization focuses on how ones race is viewed in society and touches on topics of discrimination. Cultural socialization involves preservation of the familys cultural traditions and practices. Another study was done to see if there was in fact a relationship between family cultural socialization and ethnic differences between teens. It was proven in this study that family cultural socialization did, in fact, account for the ethnic differences experienced with teens (Juang). Based on another survey dealing with ethnicity, there seems to be a relationship with family, ethnicity, and education. Many scholars debate over the achievement gap between children that group up in a white home rather than a Latino

Teague 5 or black home. This is a very important example of why family cultural socialization should be carried out. Children need to understand that there are going to be cultural and ethnic factors that set them apart from other children, however, this should not have an affect on their education or anything else for that matter. One cultural explanation offered by society is the acting white thesis. White families are thought to be the primary beneficiaries to the education system, thus other ethnicities view academic excellence to be a form of whiteness (Prudence 305). I have seen this thesis carried out throughout the halls in my high school. Although this is probably unheard of in college, in high school I had friends who would use the excuse, I am not white, in response to their grades. It was often seen in my school as the white person thing to score high on test. I am not sure where this possible stereotype originated from; however, I can only blame bad family socialization. In my house growing up my parents taught me that everyone is on an equal playing field no matter where they come from or what they believe in and that is the way it should be taught. Another important subject that needs to be discussed is family structure and how it affects identity. Family structure generally determines how mature a child is and what stage in his/her life maturity occurs. My underlying purpose is to discover what factors contribute to this maturity. Studies have shown that children with two biological parents do not mature as quickly as children without two biological parents do (Janel 1267). This is not by intention; it is by force. A child not having both biological parents is forced to grow up faster and can often lose part of his/her childhood. Also, a child from a family with less education or annual income considers himself/herself more of an adult than a child in a household of high societal status. Families with lower socioeconomic

Teague 6 backgrounds generally have children that are less reliant on there families. This causes the children to go through transitions at a much younger age and kids take hold of new household and financial responsibilities (Janel 1268). Conversations between these children and their parents are more adult-like; therefore, children see themselves as adults. Another important matter on identity formation from family influence is familycloseness. My family has definitely experienced this first had. Everyone has heard of the saying, they have him on a short leash. Well everyone knows how a dog acts when its owner keeps it on a short leash all the time. Once the dog escapes the leash it runs away and maybe it will come back, but maybe it will not. This year I have spent a good amount of time away from home, most likely as a side effect of the short leash. Parental monitoring can be a big roadblock on the highway to identity formation. It is important for parents to keep a safe distance from their children. Excessive levels of parental monitoring and excessive rules do not allow the child to make decisions on their own and low levels of parental guiding lead the child to accelerate too quickly in identity formation and the child will engage in age-inappropriate behavior (Janel 1268). All throughout high school my parents were on my back, reminding me of what I needed to do and scolding me when I did something wrong. I would look at other teenagers parents that let them run around, act crazy, drink, have people over at the house when they were not there, spend their money with little consideration and I envied it. After maturing a great deal, I can see the negative effects of the ridiculously long leash as well. In regards to this if parents are too close or not close enough to their children the child may become detached from the family. This is not a bad thing if the child is

Teague 7 entering adulthood, however, detachment at an early age has proven to have very negative effects on the child and causes them to be more open to peer-pressure (Janel 1269). One leading factor to children becoming detached is the feeling of being misunderstood by their family. Divorced families show more cases of detachments than non-divorced families (Janel 1269). Lastly, family structure can play an important part in how a child matures. Interesting enough, households with less structure prove to be more efficient than those with more structure. Children with more peer-like relationships with their parents are able to self-identify better and will take on more responsibilities than households with hierarchies (Janel 1269). After all, taking on responsibilities is the main sign of maturity. When parents see this maturity they signal to the child that they trust them to take on a task designed to normal adults and thus once trusted by their parents, children can continue their climb to discovering their identity (Janel 1270). Consequently, how a family works and operates has many affects on children in their adolescence. The way a family values education, income, ethnicity, culture and how a family structures itself and engages with one another all directly affect the children involved. A family can be view as a potters wheel, shaping and molding a work of art if done right; however, if done wrong, what comes out is a mess.