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Friday, 14 June 2013
How to Be a Dominant Man: What You
Didn't Know About the 'Winner Effect'
(/users/chase-amante)
by Chase Amante (/users/chase-amante)
Sunday, 18 December 2011
Dominance is a touchy topic. It's
positively loaded with cultural baggage
- in the West, we're averse to both the
idea of being dominant over others and
of others being dominant over us. It
has all kinds of ill-favored connotations
that most would rather just avoid. I'm
throwing all of that out today though
and talking to you about how to be a
dominant man, political correctness
and sensitivity aside - and I'm going to
teach you a lot of things you didn't
know about dominance before today.
In the post on how to be an alpha male
(/content/how-be-alpha-male-without-
becoming-stereotype) (without becoming a
stereotype), we broke down the
difference between what's generally
thought of as "alpha" and what alpha
actually is, and about the character of the nomad -- the man who's neither
alpha, nor beta, nor any other role in a social hierarchy, but instead operates
outside it entirely.
I've long noticed a failure to differentiate among "being alpha" and "being
dominant" in those who discuss social dynamics. They're treated as one and the
same -- if you're being alpha, you're dominant, and if you're being dominant,
you're alpha.
But they aren't the same. Being alpha's about heading up your group.
Meanwhile, being dominant... that's about something else altogether. What that
is -- that and the winner effect -- is what this article is all about.

Social Policing and Regular Joe
Can you be an alpha male and be dominant? Of course you can.
Can you be a nomad and be dominant? Yes, most definitely.
But how about this: could you be an alpha male and not be dominant? Well... as
I'll show below, you can.
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How about being a non-dominant nomad? Yes to that one too.
What then is dominance? How could a man be alpha but not dominant, or
dominant but not alpha?
There's something out there called "society" that's more a web of social rules
and regulations that are generally decided upon by the members of that society
and used to keep one another in line with shame, guilt, and force when
necessary. Elite members of society bend some of these rules and break others,
but Regular Joes are expected to abide by them.
For instance, if you're a celebrity, you walk up to the front of a nightclub and get
in and everyone's fine with it. "Oh, that's celebrity X," they all say
understandingly. But if you're a Regular Joe dressed in Regular Joe clothes and
you walk up to the front of a nightclub and you get in, the people waiting in line
get angry. "Who's that guy?" they ask, "and why does he get to cut the line while
I have to wait?"
This is a phenomenon I've touched lightly on here before under the name social
policing. Social policing is when people you know or even people you don't
know and have never interacted with before perceive you as equal to or lower in
status than they perceive themselves interject themselves into your life to "help
you out," "look out for you," or "set you straight." It's a justice mechanism, and
it's how members of society reassure themselves that if they just follow the
rules (like waiting in line at the nightclub to get in) then eventually they'll get
theirs.
The basic rules of social policing are these:
The stronger someone perceives you being or the stronger they respect
you, the less likely they are to social police you
The weaker someone perceives you being or the less they respect you, the
more likely they are to social police you
So, when someone sees you as being equal to or lower than them, and they
detect you doing something that they aren't doing that gives you an advantage,
they get upset. Their world is being turned upside down, and they want to get
things back in order again. They want the world to make sense and order to be
restored, because they aren't comfortable or capable operating outside of it.
Examples of social policing are:
Asking you to calm down when you're angry
Trying to be overly polite to you when they're telling you "no"
e.g., a secretary telling you "I'm so sorry, but Mr. Lawson isn't able to
see you today. If you'd like to leave your name and phone number
however, I'll do my best to see to it that he gets in touch with you
soon," when all she's trying to say is, "No, he can't see you."
Looking at you sternly or confronting you when you break the social norms
(e.g., approaching women on the street, pulling a girl into a hidden alcove,
kissing girls in public, talking loudly, swearing, behaving any way that isn't
considered "polite")
Telling you to stop having a certain kind of relationship because it's "wrong"
(e.g., you have a casual sexual relationship with a girl, and her girlfriends tell
her to demand more from you, or your friends tell you you should be more
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serious, when both of you were otherwise happy and satisfied)
All these are forms of social policing. They're means that members of society use
to get people operating within the rules that they themselves are accustomed to
operating inside of.
You see this most clearly when you travel. Act like an American in Japan, and
you're considered loud and boorish. Act like an American in China, and you get
told repeatedly how polite and friendly you are. And if you stay in these
societies long enough, and integrate, and surround yourself with locals, with
time people will put more and more social pressure on you to follow the same
rules that they follow. As you integrate with a society, that society begins to
impose its social norms on you.
To an extent, this serves good purpose: by having generally agreed upon social
rules that all follow, a society removes a lot of thinking and training and
consideration from its adherents' minds. It also helps people know what to
expect and the proper ways to interact with one another.
But these rules apply far less to dominant people. The elites of society. The
celebrities. The government officials. The wealthy. The connected. The people
with networks, resources, and respect.
Those people do whatever they want (within reason), and no one tries to social
police them (unless they get so far outside social norms relative to their position
in society that they become open game again, that is -- see Britney Spears
shaving her head and not wearing underwear in public).
Why is this?
It's because they're perceived as more dominant, powerful, resourceful, and
respected than the ordinary Regular Joes who make up society.
But wait, you might ask -- why would you even want to break social norms?
Isn't that rude, impolite, or offensive?
It's an interesting question, and it ties in closely with the discussion about how
to be a dominant man. Because learning how to be dominant is about a lot more
than just learning how to do it -- it's about learning why to be dominant, and
when you should be dominant and when you should not.

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Why You Want to Learn How to Be Dominant
What if you could just follow the rules and get everything you wanted?
Society would have you believe that well of course you can!
If you work hard and do good, you can succeed at school.
And then if you work hard and do good, you'll get a good job and make a steady
paycheck.
And if you do all that, then you'll find the girl of your dreams, get married, and
start a family.
And then if you do all that, you'll get a mortgage, get your dream house, and
save for retirement.
And for most people... that's what they'll do! Well, she probably won't really be
their dream girl, and it probably won't be their dream job... in fact, after the
honeymoon period, they'll come to hate waking up in the morning to go to
work, and they'll dread Sunday, because Sunday means the weekend is almost
over, and on Monday it starts all over again. And maybe they'll even come to
resent their girlfriends and wives, because they didn't get the girl of their
dreams... instead, they settled. And they know they settled.
That's life for the non-dominant person. A whole procession of events that
occur outside his control that just happen to him. His life has been pre-planned
by society, he follows the plan, and he gets a Regular Joe life. End story.
I won't tell you to get off that path entirely, because let's be realistic, most
people are never going to do that. Most people don't want to do that.
But I bet you also don't want to settle for less than you could get. And if that's
the case, then you need to start training up your dominance regardless, because
dominance is how you get the things you want.
Things like what, you might ask?
Dominance is how you get the women you want
Dominance is how you get the job you want
Dominance is how you get that job to pay you what you want
Dominance is how you negotiate tough deals and make them go your way
Dominance is how you get people to help you do stuff they refuse others
Dominance is how you succeed where others fail
Now, dominance isn't the only factor in these -- your skill verbally plays a role,
your presence plays a role, your precedent and relationship with the individuals
you're interacting with plays a role. But dominance plays such a big role it can't
possibly be avoided... and yet it often is. Telling someone they need to be more
dominant scares the hell out of them.
But let's say you're an attractive, well-dressed guy who knows how to talk to
women... but doesn't know how to be a dominant man. And let's say you try to
invite her home, and she says... "Why don't we just meet up in a few days?"
Well, if you're a non-dominant man, you say, "Okay." And then, chances are, you
never see her again, or she treats you like you're just a friend (/content/just-
friends-mans-worst-nightmare) when you do.
If on the other hand you're an attractive, well-dressed guy who knows how to
talk to women, and you're a dominant man, and you invite her home and she
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proposes meeting another day, what's going to happen then?
First off, you aren't going to accept meeting her another day as an option.
Second off, you're going to do everything you can to make it happen right then.
"Look, do you like me?" you ask her.
"Uh, yeah," she says. "I like you."
"Cool," you say, "I like you too. And let's be honest, if we go our
separate ways now, are we really going to meet up in a few days?"
"Sure we are," she says.
"No, we aren't," you say. "People say, 'Yeah, let's meet up later, let's do
it another time,' but another time never comes. If you like me and I like
you and we want to spend time together, then we should spend time
together right now, because if we don't we probably don't see each
other again. On the other hand, if we spend time together now and
really get to know each other and really have a good time together and
really bond, then when we decide to meet up again later we will,
because we'll already have something real. Come on."
Then you lead her out of there and pull her home.
That isn't going to work every time, but it's about 1000% more effective and
consistent than saying, "Yeah, sure, let's meet up another time." Because I'll tell
you, from years of experience -- that last one doesn't work very often.
Dominance is what lets you win. Dominance is how you close things out at the
end. Dominance is winning and making the best possible outcome come into
being.
Dominance isn't being an overly loud, coercive asshole, which is how society
portrays it. Rather, it's how you achieve a satisfactory outcome in a situation
in which other individuals are working to deny you the outcome.
Dominance is success.

Dominance, Victory, and Testosterone Levels
Want me to totally shock your world view?
Welcome into the rabbit hole. What I've got here for you are the big guns you
were waiting for me to bring out on you - you've been leading your life all
wrong.
Concessions: people make them every day. Your boss asks you to stay late.
Your girlfriend tells you she can't make it and asks to reschedule. Your parents
yell at you for racking up credit card debt and you take it. Random strangers tell
you they're sorry but they can't help you, or that you can't get what you want,
or that you need to get in line... and you do.
But what happens when you concede? Well, you just don't get what you want...
right?
Not exactly.
There've been a raft of studies that've shown the effects of winning and losing
on individuals' testosterone, and the subsequent effects on those individuals'
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confidence, dominance, assertiveness, risk taking, and even future success.
Here's just a sampling:
From Alan Booth of the University of Nevada's Department of Sociology, et al.'s
findings in "Testosterone, and winning and losing in human competition
(http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/0018506X89900421) ":
"After [tennis] matches, mean testosterone rose for winners relative to
losers, especially for winners with very positive moods after their
victories and who evaluated their own performance highly. Winners with
rising testosterone had higher testosterone before their next match, in
contrast to losers with falling testosterone, who had lower testosterone
before their next match."
From Kevin D. McCaul of the Department of Psychology, North Dakota State
University et al.'s findings in "Winning fights elevates testosterone levels in
California mice and enhances future ability to win fights
(http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0018506X05000978) ":
"The winner effect has been studied in a variety of species, but only
rarely in mammals. We compared effects of winning three, two, one, or
zero residentintruder encounters on the likelihood of winning a
subsequent aggressive encounter in the California mouse (Peromyscus
californicus). During the training phase, we ensured that resident males
won all encounters by staging contests with mildly sedated, smaller
intruders. During the test phase, the resident male encountered an
unfamiliar, more evenly matched intruder that had experience winning
an encounter and was larger than the resident. Testosterone (T) plasma
levels significantly increased after the final test when they had
experienced two prior winning encounters, and the probability of
winning a future encounter increased significantly after three prior wins
independent of intrinsic fighting ability. We hypothesize a winner
challenge effect in which increased T levels serve to reinforce the winner
effect in male California mice."
I'll put those in laymen's terms real quick.
From the first: winning a sports match increased testosterone in subjects, losing
it decreased testosterone. From mice studies, mice with higher testosterone
from previous victories won a lot more than other mice equal in all other
respects except that their testosterone was lower from previous losses.
Think about that: higher testosterone levels from victory help you win more in
the future, and something as small as winning or losing a tennis match can
influence that.
But wait, it gets better.
From another study by McCaul, this one entitled "Winning, losing, mood, and
testosterone (http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/0018506X9290016O) ":
"In two experiments, male college students either won or lost $5 on a task
controlled entirely by chance. In both studies, winners reported a more
positive mood change than did losers and, in Experiment 2, winners
reported a more positive mood change than a neutral group that did not
win or lose money. After the task was completed, winners exhibited
significantly higher testosterone levels than losers. Levels of cortisol, a
hormone associated with stress and arousal, did not differ among the
groups, suggesting that a hormone-behavior response pattern for
winning and losing is specific to testosterone. These data suggest that
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winning can alter testosterone levels in men and that mood may mediate
such changes."
I bolded that sentence in there. But did you catch that? Even something as
insignificant as a randomly controlled $5 payout had a significant impact on
these students' testosterone levels.
Which, if humans are anything like mice in their reactions to high and low levels
of testosterone -- and they are; they're dead similar -- something as trivial as
winning or losing a random $5 can be the difference in whether those students go
off to create a work of art that afternoon or pick up the girl of their dreams, or
spend the afternoon staring at the wall or avoiding the gaze of pretty girls.
Do you get this?
Learning how to be a dominant man isn't just about "being dominant." It's about
learning how to structurally correct your life so that you're putting yourself into
a feedback loop of consistently winning, leading to elevated testosterone levels,
leading to further winning, leading to further elevated testosterone levels, and
so on and so forth.
This is the winner effect. Winners win more, and losers lose more. It's why
when you have something good happen to you in the morning you often go off
to have a killer day, and why when you start a day off on the wrong foot the
whole day goes awry. It's why when you start meeting people the instant you go
out you often end up having a great night and meet a lot of cute girls and maybe
even take one home, and it's why when you go sit around and talk to no one for
a while you often meet no one the entire night.
Here are a few more studies to pound this point home.
From the findings of J. M. Coates and J. Herbert of the University of Cambridge
in "Endogenous steroids and financial risk taking on a London trading floor
(http://www.pnas.org/content/105/16/6167.short) ":
"We found that a trader's morning testosterone level predicts his day's
profitability. We also found that a trader's cortisol rises with both the
variance of his trading results and the volatility of the market. Our results
suggest that higher testosterone may contribute to economic return,
whereas cortisol is increased by risk. Our results point to a further
possibility: testosterone and cortisol are known to have cognitive and
behavioral effects, so if the acutely elevated steroids we observed were to
persist or increase as volatility rises, they may shift risk preferences and
even affect a trader's ability to engage in rational choice."
Testosterone predicted traders' profitability.
Think about that.
Now that's not necessarily causation -- if a guy's been trading for a while and
he's good, he'll be having more wins and his T levels will be up, and if a guy's
been trading for a while and he isn't good, he'll have more losses and his T levels
will be down. But I've consistently seen studies that point to trading being a lot
more luck than skill, so my inclination after seeing this research is to posit that
high testosterone traders are more aggressive in pursuing opportunities and
taking the big risks that potentially offer big rewards.
So, not necessarily causation -- but here's one that indisputably is, entitled
"Second-to-fourth digit ratio predicts success among high-frequency financial
traders (http://www.pnas.org/content/106/2/623.short) ," again from Coates et al.:
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"Prenatal androgens have important organizing effects on brain
development and future behavior. The second-to-fourth digit length ratio
(2D:4D) has been proposed as a marker of these prenatal androgen effects,
a relatively longer fourth finger indicating higher prenatal androgen
exposure. 2D:4D has been shown to predict success in highly competitive
sports. Yet, little is known about the effects of prenatal androgens on an
economically influential class of competitive risk takingtrading in the
financial world. Here, we report the findings of a study conducted in the
City of London in which we sampled 2D:4D from a group of male traders
engaged in what is variously called noise or high-frequency trading.
We found that 2D:4D predicted the traders' long-term profitability as
well as the number of years they remained in the business. 2D:4D also
predicted the sensitivity of their profitability to increases both in
circulating testosterone and in market volatility. Our results suggest that
prenatal androgens increase risk preferences and promote more rapid
visuomotor scanning and physical reflexes. The success and longevity of
traders exposed to high levels of prenatal androgens further suggests
that financial markets may select for biological traits rather than
rational expectations."
Yeah, you read right. The amount of testosterone you were exposed to in the
womb has a bigger impact on your financial success as a stock trader than any
other factor.
Did your eyes just open a little wider?

How to Be a Dominant Man: Training Yourself
to Win
If you want to make a lot of money, do a lot of cool things, and sleep with a lot
of pretty girls, this is probably one of the most important things you will ever do
for yourself:
You need to learn how to be a dominant man.
If you weren't fortunate enough to have been exposed to a high dose of prenatal
testosterone and have a naturally dominant personality, you're going to need to
train it up. And that's going to mean you're going to have to get accustomed to
going against your default programming.
You need the winner effect in your corner -- it's going to make every single
thing you do work a whole lot better.
But how do you start training yourself to be dominant?
To start with, you need to know the most important rule of dominance, success,
and victory: always find a way to win.
That means you can never concede. You can never give up. You must always
get a success or at the very least do things on your terms.
Your boss asks you to stay late: "I've really got to get out of here but I'm
happy to do some work from home later tonight if it's mission critical or
otherwise get on that first thing tomorrow."
Your girlfriend tries to reschedule: "Okay, let's meet right now then and
then you can go see your friends," or, "Actually I'm going to be booked up
for the next week. If you can't make tonight let's reschedule after next
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week."
Your parents yell at you for racking up
credit card debt: "You guys are right, I
should've been more careful, but
instead of yell at me, what can you do
to help or what recommendations can
you make for me to get back on track?"
Strangers say they can't help you: "Yes
you can. You can help me. You're the
only one who can help me -- how do
we make this work?"
Being dominant isn't about being a
loud-mouthed asshole. Learning how
to be a dominant man is about
learning how to control the situation -
- how to get a satisfactory result no
matter the circumstances, how to
prevent others who are trying to dominate you from being able to, how to keep
your testosterone levels high and keep the winner effect on and fight having
your testosterone slashed and your will to win and confidence and
assertiveness and risk taking broken.
Maybe you weren't dosed with tons of testosterone in the womb. I wasn't. My
2D:4D ratio is about on par with the average man; my ring finger is slightly
longer than average compared to my index finger, which means I naturally have
a bit more testosterone than average, but it isn't huge. But you can still have all
the success with women, with money, with life that you want if you build wins
into your life and fight concessions as if your life depended on it. Because your
life might not depend on how often you win and how often you concede -- but
the quality of that life, and the success you have within it, most certainly does.
Yours,
Chase Amante
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Comments
Nice (/content/how-be-dominant-man-what-you-didnt-know-
about-winner-effect#comment-1044)
Posted by Lachie on Tuesday, 20 December 2011
Nice article brother. Saving this one for future reference. Its very
important to get into positive feedback loops - if you're not moving
forward and upwards, you will sink down. Slowly at first, but then faster
and faster - there is no stasis, and there is no coasting in the game of life.
Always be leaning into your Edge.
Just another one (/content/how-be-dominant-man-what-you-
didnt-know-about-winner-effect#comment-1055)
Posted by Fel on Thursday, 22 December 2011
Yo Chase!
6/14/13 How to Be a Dominant Man: What You Didn' t Know About the ' Winner Effect' | Girls Chase
www.girlschase.com/content/how-be-dominant-man-what-you-didnt-know-about-winner-effect 11/15
first of all, i'm in debt to you for life! what you do for men on this site for
free, is priceless, and for that i will always consider you my brother. great
articles, explained in a manner that i can understand. being born shy, and
a thinker, sometimes i can't feel what others can. you've increased my
awareness ten fold over the last few months. i've lived in the D.C. area
most of my life. it would have been a pleasure to have met you. if we
haven't met already. question; how do you think pimps use psychology in
dominance?
When can you have this done by? (/content/how-be-
dominant-man-what-you-didnt-know-about-winner-
effect#comment-1394)
Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, 6 March 2012
Hey Chase! A common question employers or teachers tend to ask is
"When can you have this done by?" I always find myself trapped by that
question - committing to a date that is too far away seems lame, but
committing to a date that is too soon just locks me in with an
unnecessarily short deadline. How would you respond to that question in
a dominant way, and find a way to win in this scenario?
This article is real. Made me (/content/how-be-dominant-
man-what-you-didnt-know-about-winner-effect#comment-2265)
Posted by Chin on Tuesday, 17 July 2012
This article is real. Made me see and do things different. Made me more
doninant and confident in my relationship. I also loved that part about be
dominant if a girl say we can meet up in a few days. That stuff really
works.
Good article..I used to be (/content/how-be-dominant-man-
what-you-didnt-know-about-winner-effect#comment-2577)
Posted by Urboy on Monday, 27 August 2012
Good article..I used to be like that but friends played on me where I
started acting like them now I want to regain that smooth talk again.
This stuff works. My brother (/content/how-be-dominant-
man-what-you-didnt-know-about-winner-effect#comment-2602)
Posted by Vincent (http://expertxteriors.com/Siding.html) on Wednesday,
29 August 2012
This stuff works. My brother is actually like this... and although I have
called him a jerk most of my life (probably because I was just jealous of
him and he dominates me in many situations), now I see him as a role
model.
Social Policing - Short term and Long term? (/content/how-be-
dominant-man-what-you-didnt-know-about-winner-effect#comment-2745)
6/14/13 How to Be a Dominant Man: What You Didn' t Know About the ' Winner Effect' | Girls Chase
www.girlschase.com/content/how-be-dominant-man-what-you-didnt-know-about-winner-effect 12/15
Posted by The Policed on Sunday, 16 September 2012
Hey Chase!
I read this article a while back on your site, but found that it had some
relevance to me recently. I was recently at a party and mentioned to a girl
there that her shirt was sexy, and later started up a conversation with her
- admittedly at the time I wasn't doing a very good job escalating / using
your tips from this site - so basically just picture your standard guy who's
bumbling around but not powerfully escalating quickly. Anyway, as I was
in a conversation with her, a friend of mine and hers came up to me and
was like "Relax. That's my advice. You're not relaxed."
Whether I was relaxed or not then, I definitely wasn't after she made that
comment - I ended up leaving the party shortly thereafter. At any rate, I
was wondering about several things:
1. What is the best way to respond to a situation when you are socially
policed? I know there are general aspects of your personality, being a
more dominant man, etc that can prevent it in general, but when it does
happen what's the best way to respond?
2. I've been told something along the same lines in the past, and I feel like
the "non relaxed state" they are probably talking about might be pointing
to an imbalance between nvbl and verbal signals - really not sure though.
But based on that form of social policing, do you have any guess what
would have prompted her to say that and what I should change about my
personality to fix it?
My last question is not necessarily as related to the topic of social policing
but is kind of what I think landed me in this spot. I know that first
impression is key, and a lot of what you talk about on this site is having
direct openers etc. But what if I'm in a situation where I'm with someone
who I already met and had a bit of a conversation with (say like 1-2 hours
into meeting her) and then afterward decide that she's kind of cute and I
want to try escalating. How would you advise going about doing that? Or
is it better to just bag that chance and go find a chick who you haven't
met yet and escalate right from the beginning? I think it was trying to flirt
with someone who I had already been treating like just a friend that might
have given off an "awk" vibe that led to the "relax" social policing.
What are your thoughts?
Thanks!
body language, tone, verbal (/content/how-be-dominant-
man-what-you-didnt-know-about-winner-effect#comment-3187)
Posted by Anonymous on Monday, 15 October 2012
body language, tone, verbal fluency, confidence in your interpretation,
coupled with a laid-backness, as you know you're right, to such self-
evident extent that you're almost helping the other, rather than
convincing them for your own means, and hence convey a caring but
laissez faire attitude towards whether the other believes... of course,
this is one approach, dominance can work too, as can more histrionic
showmanship, of such skill that it conveys more of a natural desire to
6/14/13 How to Be a Dominant Man: What You Didn' t Know About the ' Winner Effect' | Girls Chase
www.girlschase.com/content/how-be-dominant-man-what-you-didnt-know-about-winner-effect 13/15
get people pumped and happy, rather than impress, because you don't
have to impress, you know you are impressive, you have nothing to
prove... but u have to authentically know that, not believe that... which
requires, in a way, winning, again, and again, in everything, awards,
ppls attention, their trust, favors, important peoples friendships, re-
framing losing as learning, external attributions for unsuccessful
endeavors... i use to fail at everything, slowly that changed, now i don't
have to really try and convince myself effort equals success, the
contingency of reward is almost 100 percent... that knowing, makes all
the difference, u don't have to be better, being better knows u can
achieve, because ur likely to put in the action required for reward,
because payoff perception is high, then it becomes a positive feedback
loop, and losses seem like abberations, u accept a poor effort, analyze
it, look at what contributed, and retool... because u learn ur locus of
control is very internal, failure is a result of deviation, chance, or
atypical preperation or idiosyncratic circumstance... winning isn't
intrinsic to you, you just know how to, not theoretically, but
empircally, and this contingency means ull push even when ppl try to
repudiate ur projection of self determined societal norms, u know u
win, statistically, so u push back, without the number of action-reward
events, this is far from certain, so ur assesment of probability suffers
from low sample size, and lack of statistical power... lol, funny, ur
getting the phenomenology, behavioural psychology, statistics, social
psychology, social cognition, and behavioral economics... transposed
to a social domain, all in one... perhaps the theoretical of what the
author describes in a more intuitive fashion... which is equally valid, in
the end, we both say the same thing... although my explanation in this
post is likely far more explanatory than utilitarian... and in the end,
utility, or the ends, is what matters, so kudos to the author!
oh wow (/content/how-be-dominant-man-what-you-didnt-know-
about-winner-effect#comment-3186)
Posted by Anonymous on Monday, 15 October 2012
someone gets it... this insight is so rare, i don't lose... why, because i don't,
ur automated perception of social norms can be easily thrown into
confusion when the fear of being wrong, of embarrassment, a shot to the
social validation you so desperately seek... because i seem so innocuous,
but a statistical deviation, if i get you to question what's normal, why it is,
why it's rational, or just convince you via inducing anxiety to fuck with
your orbito-frontal, pre-frontal, your perception of every axiom you
know... via a hint of doubt coupled with your hyper-functional amygdala
which you overcompensate for to never have to face, lol... ur done, i get
away with everything, i wont even elaborate, and the processes required
are so heterogeneous, charm and mutual identification, eliciting pity, then
after the point showing how you overcame, without sounding arrogant,
more with a desirable to share to help others... can earn you favours...
social scripts, norms, open and closed situations, body language,
confusing people with conflicting schematic presentations... now that's
messed, i get what i want, and i repudiate every societal paradigm in the
book... self-handicapping and still getting what i want... ironically, i hate
the pedestal im constantly put on, i seek novelty, challenge... sounds
paradoxical, but winning and winning, and winning, gets boring... then
again, there's always another level to push yourself too, right?
6/14/13 How to Be a Dominant Man: What You Didn' t Know About the ' Winner Effect' | Girls Chase
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Just wow (/content/how-be-dominant-man-what-you-didnt-know-
about-winner-effect#comment-8317)
Posted by Jake on Wednesday, 10 April 2013
Nothing to add, just wow, kudos, and thx a million. Also bump. A couple
guys at the top asked a couple questions I'd kinda like to see answered.
Dayum.. (/content/how-be-dominant-man-what-you-didnt-know-
about-winner-effect#comment-8981)
Posted by Anonymous on Saturday, 11 May 2013
Honestly I was sent to this page by my girlfriend, so I feel a little ridiculous
actually being here. But I'm definitely not doing this for her after reading
this, I'm going to do this for me. Sure I imagine it'd be nice if it happened
for her. But it'll be more for me. The winner effect? Yes, that sounds like
something I'd enjoy in my corner. I just need to find a means of keeping
this in my head. I'll probably have it open and work read it once a day or
something, that way I just know a little more. Being dominant isn't natural
for me, but maybe it might be. Thanks Chase!
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6/14/13 How to Be a Dominant Man: What You Didn' t Know About the ' Winner Effect' | Girls Chase
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