Final Reflection

If I were to teach University Writing 1101, I would look to my 1101 professor,

Mrs. Thomas for inspiration. She would always try to provoke our class to improve
ourselves through our writing. The idea of exercising self-improvement by mastering
different mediums, I think, should be the paramount in any writing class or any class,
for that matter. The ideas Mrs. Thomas communicated were ones of personal
development and how progress can be made through healthy habits. Habits like,
thinking about how you think to analyze your strong-sets, your weaknesses, your
habits, your knowledge and your skills so you can become more self-critical. Then,
using that skill of self-critique to improve your work. Practicing this in writing not
only showed us how we can work to better ourselves as writers but how we can work
to better ourselves in other aspects of our lives. It can be directly applied to writing,
along with other subjects, and allows students to see their progress as they watch their
papers improve. I wouldnt hesitate to imply the idea of self-improvement through
critical, metacognitive thinking in my class if I were the professor.

This is a key idea emphasized by Mrs. Thomas that I have found to be vital in my
own personal development. Being a college freshman who came to school with no
particular goal, no motivation to work and a stressful situation at home, I understand,
now, how important your first professors impact can be on your college career. I had
lost faith in institutional education after leaving private school to go to my public high
school. I had no guidance before, except for my parents, who simply told me I had to
graduate and go to college to get a degree. How to decide a degree, why college is

important, where I want to go, why I want to go there and how to succeed were not
things I learned in high school. I pretty much felt like I was blind coming into college.
I had no idea what I was getting myself into. How much work I would have to do to
succeed or why I even wanted to succeed in the first place. I had no interest in going
to college. My poor work ethic perpetuated that idea of not following the system and
instilled me with doubt when I was confronted with the college work load.

In public school I was taught how to get by with minimum effort, how not to
trust, how not to care and picked up a strong defiance of the system along with
many other bad habits. These ideas were spread by the students and then, through
lack of leadership, perpetuated by the teachers and administrators. The laziness and
defiance were so ingrained in the school that students talked back to teachers,
teachers talked back to administrators and administrators did nothing to improve the
situationnothing. I had a teacher who didnt give us assignments, besides in-class
textbook reading, and then gave us open note tests. Considering he made up our final
grades at the end of the quarter based purely on his judgment, I think those tests were
just self-assurance for himself. He was later fired after many complaints from parents
with children over-joyed by the fact that he would sleep through classes and give free
days regularly. My senior year, 4th quarter, I did not a single assignment in my
English class and received an A through befriending my teacher by simply siding
with him during our daily in-class arguments. Thats how dysfunctional my high
school was and I allowed it to mold me into an equally dysfunctional pupil.

Coming to college and realizing how dysfunctional I really was, lit the fire inside
of me to learn, improve and grow. Not knowing how or even where to start, I
panicked instead. I looked for quick fixes and constantly felt defeated when I couldnt
even get myself to focus on completing an assignment. I knew that my ADD had a
big role in this inattentive behavior but I hung onto my notions. I went back to what I
knew and perpetuated my dysfunctional habits that had gotten me through high
school. It became obvious by the end of the first semester that these dysfunctional
habits would not get my through college. By the time of this essay I would have
already definitively failed 2 of my classes with the others teetering dangerously on
the edge. Recognizing this before the end of the semester would be the only thing to
save my college career from being thrown in the toilet. My greatest ability, to respond
to emergencies with the utmost focus, came into play. I popped some of my ADD
pills and got to work resurrecting what grades still had life left in them.

Making up a semesters worth of late work and paying the price for it was the
shock that I needed in my life to show me what I was doing wrong. Not only was I
letting myself fail but I was quick to blame it on things in my past. I found every
explanation for my mindset but never took a realist approach to changing it. It all
started to become clear as I worked through my late liberal studies essays. They
required an open mind and a great deal of self-reflection with the goal of building a
broader perspective of the world. I had taken my adderall and had my own instincts to
keep me focused on the assignment. That focus combined with nature of the essays
broke the cycle of negative thinking that had been plaguing me since high school.

One of the essay topics was exactly what I needed to begin the process of selfreflection that leads to self-improvement; Who am I now? Who do I want to
become? How must I change to become the person I want to be? How can I use my
college education to become the person I want to be?

The resulting essay came out in a tidal-wave of anger, resentment and denial. I
turned it in without changing a thing because it felt so satisfying to write, at first. Like
an elephant sized weight had been lifted from my shoulders, I felt a great deal of
relief to get my thoughts about myself off of my chest. Luckily, my professor asked
me to resend the essay to his email so I reluctantly took the opportunity to reread
what I wrote, knowing that it may reignite emotions. I was stunned by how emotional
I got and how radical my point-of-view seemed to be only days ago when I wrote it. I
recognized how blind my negative thoughts and emotions could make me to
everything, even the ones I loved. Of whom I down-right trashed in the first draft of
my essay. I worked carefully to make the essay seem less extreme but still keep my
original ideas. The assignment had made its mark on me, the meaningful mark that
professors aim to make when they create assignments like this. It made me look in the
mirror, the actual mirror and reflect on my life and how my decisions have affected it.
It was the turning point that I needed to get myself on the right track to building a
positive mindset that will allow me to succeed.

After the realization I had from writing the essay, I began to pick apart, well
how I picked myself apart. I noticed how I always focused on the negative aspects of
myself. I blamed my shortcomings on my learning disabilities and tended to only find
excuses for them but never solutions. I was also failing to notice what was right in
front of me; the solution and everything I would need to take full advantage of it. I
had realized that I had become something far from myself since I left the cushiony
confines of private school. It was something I already knew subliminally but that I
repressed with negative notions of being failed by the system and society. It got me
to look back at who I am and what I was by the end of 8th grade before my life got
turned upside down. I recognized that I struggled with school and socializing but that
it was only natural of someone with my disabilities. By 8th grade, I had accepted my
position in the world. I recognized my strengths and weaknesses during a point in
time when I had nothing clouding my judgment. I took advantage of my strengths and
of the amazing academic institute I was a part of. I realized how much I loved
learning and how great school can be when you chose to take interest in it. I was a
renowned athlete and a blossoming intellectual achieving As and Bs in school work
that was comparable to college level work by the end of 8th grade.

Naturally, one would ask, what happened? Why cant I do that now? I was able to
quickly bring in my high school experience and the life events surrounding it in as the
answer. I forgot about academics because there were none. My interests moved to
that of my peers. Getting intoxicated, making destructive decisions and experiencing
things that wouldnt have been so accessible in private school. It made me realize that

I went into high school with too open of a mindset. I conformed to the norm in high
school even though it went against my original perspective. I got so wrapped up in the
paradigm of being an Owings Mills high school student that I forgot to be Jake
Lipman. I got so far away from who I was by the time I got to college that it took me
coming points away from completely failing my first semester to start recognizing my
problem. I needed to let myself out. I had to go back to being myself again and not
letting my situation dictate my attitude or conforming to fit in. Focusing on my
strengths and accepting my dispositions, like I did before high school crushed my
spirit, is what I need to do. The unproductive role I had taken on during high school
encompassed me in a false sense of being that has hindered me in so many aspects of
my life, up until now. Now that I have recognized the problem, I can begin to reverse
the damage done and begin to learn and grow like I used to.

Looking at what I have in front of me, for once, brings great relief to me in my
realizations and resulting problem solving that I have found myself working through.
I wrote the words down in my liberal studies reflection essay but I didnt believe in
what I was saying. I am in the place I need to be, Im in school. Im enrolled in the
college of my dreams and Im just waking up to realize it. Anything and everything I
could ever ask for out of an academic institute is here at UNCC. There are even
programs in place to help me out of the academic rut I have gotten myself into. Most
of all, though, there are purposeful lessons and professors that care about advancing
their students. Professors like Mrs. Thomas and Dr. Fitzgerald that make the main
focus of their course and material the advancement of their students. I couldnt think

of a better combination to instill trust and value back in institutional education for me.
Not only will this help me get back to where I was but it will help me to continue to
learn and grow through-out my time here at the university.

I firmly believe in the ideas emphasized by Mrs. Thomas to be paramount in a

freshman level writing class. Even if they arent struggling to dig themselves out of a
self-destructive rut, like I have been, any freshman can benefit from learning to be
self-critical. It is the most valuable skill you can learn and an idea that I believe
should be emphasized throughout any and all academic careers. The amount of power
self-critiquing has is hard for me to ignore. The idea brought about the right thoughts
in me that eventually lead me the answers I needed to get myself out of the hole I
have been in. Its the reason this reflection is as in-depth as it is. I couldnt help but
continue to analyze myself more as I wrote this. Mrs. Thomas has helped teach me a
skill that has changed the way I go about my entire life and I would do the same put
in her position.

The key idea of being self-critical was not the only important thing that Mrs.
Thomas introduced me to. In our class we read and wrote about Stephen King, the
award winning author. Specifically, we read his key points to being a good writer
which I found very helpful. He highlights and analysis the many key points to take
into consideration while writing. From not being afraid to speak your mind to being
your own worst critic. King emphasizes individuality and writing in your own unique
style that you find comfortable. This was helpful for me because I had learned how to

write in structures that pleased teachers in high school but not how to write in my
own language to convey exactly what I want to communicate through my writing.
This lesson from King has helped me not only in my writing class or other classes but
in all communications in my life. He has the right ideas about writing and is an
inspiration to me as writer. I think an additional assignment on Kings keys to good
writing would be beneficial to building strong writing skills.

Self-critique and individuality in my writing have built my sense of purpose,

audience and genre. I am able to understand the purpose of my paper and stick to it as
I write making sure not to stray from the main idea. Something extremely in other
classes that ask you to answer specific questions and focus on how well you answer it
rather than how well written the essay is. That sense of purpose goes hand-in-hand
with a sense of audience. Knowing who you are writing to, who you are addressing, is
just as important as knowing what you are writing about. I wouldnt write a paper to a
5 year-old the same way I would write a paper to a professor and its beneficial to
know the difference so I can tailor my papers in each of my classes to that audience.
Same thing can be said about genre. Depending on how you want to convey your
ideas there are so many different genres to take into consideration and picking the
right one that reflects your purpose and audience is key to writing an communicative
paper. In any class, I can take what I have learned about writing and put it to work.

Say I found myself in a class that was writing intensive and there was no time
allotted to peer review. I know I can really use a peer-review to gain perspective on

my writing and myself so, in this situation, Id just have to make my own group. It
might be a little awkward to try to convince some peers to read and critique my paper
as I critique theirs. The awkwardness can be minimized through the suggestion of
doing a review to get a better grade on the paper for the all of us. Good grades is
universal language to all students that means, something you should do. Suggesting
that peer review groups have helped me in the past by helping me gain feedback from
my audience and gain an understanding of what I need to improve on may help
persuade them even further. Once together, I would suggest the key ideas to great
writing that I have identified like being your own worst critic, being aware of purpose
and learning how to express yourself freely through your writing. I would suggest
closed eyes, deep breaths and silence to clear the mind and calm the body before
letting the words flow from your head to your fingertips. Opening the faucet and
letting your ideas flow onto paper but without losing sight on the purpose or
audience. This behavior will help them grow as writers as they might find themselves
becoming more and more comfortable communicating their thoughts.

One of the papers I wrote during the semester stood out to me as a good example
my skills and healthy writing habits. That paper was my Genre Analysis of rally
racing. Since I am completely mesmerized by rally racing, it wasnt hard for me to
dive into. I took into consideration that my audience knew little to nothing about rally
racing and that I would need to convey a clear image of the sport before I could even
begin analyzing the different genre examples pertaining to it. So I started drafting by
writing it like the opening scene of a novel about rally racing, including as much

detail and emotion provoking sentences as possible. I focused on building a general

understanding and, more importantly, an emotional connection between the reader
and rally racing. Then I went on to analyze how different genres represent rally racing
and what their purpose is in their work. My peers told me that they had a great visual
from the beginning of my paper but it left them with more questions about rally
racing that they wanted to know. I put in more background, persuasive detail and
compared it to other forms of racing that are more widely understood in attempt to
build a better understanding of the sport in my audience. I tweaked some imagery and
created a more dramatic opening than I had before to really capture my audiences
attention. All said and done, I think I created one of my best pieces to date. It draws
the audience in, educates them on the topic and then gives them perspectives to build
their own off of. It does a near perfect job at fulfilling its purpose. It is creative, it is
persuasive, it is thought provoking and it is meaningful in all the right ways resulting
in something of a masterpiece to me at least.