Kaity Duranti

Formal Observation #1
Abby Kerlin
October 1st, 2014

Writing Workshop: Drafting our Seed Ideas

Teaching Point: Writers select a seed idea from their notebooks to develop on special draft paper. Drafting
does not mean copying word-for-word, but using all the strategies youve learned to make your story even
better!

Learning Objective(s)
What do you want students
to know, understand, or be
able to do as a result of this
lesson?

Students will be able to select an entry from their notebook that reflects their
understanding of seed ideas and begin a first draft on drafting paper.
Students will understand that drafting does not mean copying your work, but adding
on as you go, drawing on known strategies, to make your story even better.

Evidence for
assessment
Where will you look
(product, performance,
documentation you create,
etc.) for signs of student
learning?
What will you look for?
What are your criteria?
(examples of statements or
actions that would show the
particular kinds of
understandings, learnings,
&/or skills you are after?)

Where?
Connection: Turn and Talk / T-Chart

Active Engagement: Shared Writing

Independent Writing

Small Group Work

Rationale
Why are you teaching this

What?
Pre-draft a T-Chart, Watermelon Topics
vs. Seed Stories. Use a class mentor text,
such as Marla Frazees Roller Coaster, to
get started. Ask kids to turn and talk about
another seed story that might emerge from
a day at the amusement park. Make a
mental note of those who are having
trouble zooming in on one moment. Have
they been to an amusement park? Invite
students to share ideas and record them on
chart. Choose a strong seed idea and ask
the rest of the class if they agree (thumbs
up). Take notice of which students might
need more support with this .
Invite students to use the strategies they
have been learning to develop a piece of
writing around a shared experience.
Opportunities for assessment:
1. Writing a lead
2. Using 5 senses to add details to
sentences
3. Wrapping up final thoughts with a
powerful conclusion
Look at student drafts alongside their prewriting from notebooks. What strategies
are students using to develop stories? Are
they refining their leads? Elaborating with
the 5 senses in mind? Adding sound
words? Slowing down their stories?
Which students did not start a draft today?
Are students still writing about big topics,
or do these drafts show an understanding
of seed ideas?
Invite students who are having trouble
getting started to orally talk through their
ideas for a small seed story. Once students
have a moment in mind, pose questions
that support them with developing details.
Use student work to determine if students
are developing a better understanding.

CCSS.ELA-LITERACY.W.3.3

Write narratives to develop real or imagined experiences or events using effective

lesson? What connections technique, descriptive details, and clear event sequences.
does it have to standards?
Does it connect to students CCSS.ELA-LITERACY.W.3.3.A
interests, strengths, and
Establish a situation and introduce a narrator and/or characters; organize an
needs?

event sequence that unfolds naturally.

CCSS.ELA-LITERACY.W.3.3.B

Use dialogue and descriptions of actions, thoughts, and feelings to develop

experiences and events or show the response of characters to situations
CCSS.ELA-LITERACY.W.3.5

With guidance and support from peers and adults, develop and strengthen writing
as needed by planning, revising, and editing.
I am teaching this lesson because I want my students to understand drafting as an opportunity to
breathe life into their stories. Most third graders do not have experience with drafting, and must be
taught the ins and outs of this crucial step in the writing process from the use of special draft paper
to tapping into their growing repertoire of strategies. A large portion of this lesson revisits the
distinction between writing about a big watermelon topic and narrowing in on one moment, or one
experience, that happened within those stories. After looking over student work from this unit, at
least a third of my current class could benefit from additional practice with this essential component
that defines a seed idea. Additionally, I noticed children needed more practice unfreezing their
stories. Many are summarizing an event rather than telling about an experience. Therefore, since
drafting is being taught as an opportunity to develop their pieces, this lesson also provides students
with a review of the strategies and techniques they have been using to improve their stories. Most
students have exhibited a knack for detail, whether in their writing or their story telling. The
modeling and shared writing portion of this mini-lesson offers students several opportunities to
demonstrate this skill. It also applies to their strengths because most of my students are more
inclined to engage during lessons that rely on their input. This lesson uses their interests in a few
ways: (i) it acknowledges the work students have been doing, and the topics they have been writing
about; (ii) it uses a favorite mentor texts; (iii) it taps into a meaningful experience since many
children have written and spoken about taking a trip to an amusement park; and (iv) the active
engagement portion of the lesson is rooted in a shared experience.

Prerequisite Knowledge I am counting on students having an understanding of a narrative structure. In order

What prior knowledge are
for students to participate, especially in the second half of this lesson, they must
you counting on? Will this be
have some knowledge of how to unfold an experience in the way that it happened.
a problem for any of your
students and if so, what will am also hoping that students know that they are writing about a personal story,
you do?

something real that occurred. This lesson takes into consideration that some
students are still struggling with zooming in on a small episode, but it assumes they
know they are not writing about invented characters or fictional storylines, they are
writing about true stories that are important to them. Students have already learned
how to strategically select leads, recall sensory details, include action and
incorporate dialogue in order to improve their writing in very noticeable ways. This
lesson expects students to be familiar with these strategies and to draw on them

when developing their stories on draft paper.

Learning Experience

Assessment

In each section below, specify the sequence of instructional activities.

Consider how you will manage materials, bodies, and time. Use small
boxes to indicate time.

What will you look/listen to/for?

Starting It

Connection: Writers, Ive been so

Thumbs up:
with the work youve been
*In order for students to reach the
doing with your personal narratives.
intended learning targets, they must
Weve been collecting our seed ideas and envision their own stories moving
working on our notebook entries for the through the writing process. Thus, the
last few weeks to develop important
purpose of this quick assessment is to
small moments that have happened in our ensure that all students are thinking about
lives. Thumbs up if you have a collection how to move their own work forward.
of narrative (real life) stories in your
Additionally, this assessment should
writers notebook or a list of seed ideas on provide important information about
the graphic organizer we used yesterday. students learning and their learning
Awesome. So I think we are reading to needs. If a student has composed several
move on to the next step
strong entries throughout this unit and
fails to put his thumb up, it is likely that
Yesterday, we spent some time talking he didnt understand the question (or
about the difference between big
perhaps needs it repeated). On the other
watermelon topics, like the amusement hand, if a students journal consists
park, and small seed ideas, like Violets mostly of summaries around big events, a
experience with the clumsy Jellyfish, or failure to check in could be an indication
Jaydens small seed experience with
of a larger disconnect. The teacher must
Jaws. Many of you elected to use the
therefore be ready to help students get
graphic organizer as a tool to help you
back on track (Mareah, you should have
generate ideas. AshleyBeach Diego your thumb up because you wrote that
soccer in his backyard, JessicaBracelet beautiful story about the time your
from your friend in Australia. Then you grandma gave you her gold ribbon.)
developed those ideas by re-living the
moment. You recreated your experiences
for the reader by elaborating using your
five senses. I could almost taste the salty
popcorn dripping with butter while
reading Josiahs story about the movies!
As I read all your stories, I discovered
your power. Your power to really make a

How will you invite students impressed

into the learning experience?

story come alive.

So I started thinking, imagine what they
could do if they had the chance to make
their writing even stronger? Then I
remembered that you guys are in third
grade now and at the stage in your
writing careers where you learn about a
very important step of the writing process
called drafting...

Doing It
Outline your sequence of
instructional moves including
participation structures,
materials, intellectual
resources, and time allotted.
Is there a product or
performance you will be
expecting students to
create?

Teaching: When you draft, you move out

of your notebook and develop your
stories on special draft paper, revising by
adding details, sound words, action or
dialogue as you go. You dont copy word
for word what is in your notebook.
Instead, you think about the story as you
go, and try to make it better. In order to
make a story better, you have to breathe
life into it. Put yourself back in a
moment, and stretch it out with more
details, like Marla Frazee does with
Roller Coaster.

Mentor Text: Revisit a few pages in

Roller Coaster, by Marla Frazee.

Now watch how I look through my own

writers notebook and choose an entry that
I think I can say more about:
1. The First Day of School

If time permits, ask students to identify

and explain some of the strategies the
author used when zooming in and
stretching out her story. Make note of
students who seem engaged in thinking
about this question. For this class, I might
find evidence of student thinking in
raised hands, eyes on text, silent
reflection or verbal cues.

1. Looking for raised hands or other

signs of engagement (verbal
disagreement, shaking heads
no) Then listening for students
who can identify one thing that

happened on our first day that

could be developed as a small
moment.

2. A journal entry that summarizes a

book we read together
3. A day at Disney
4. Jamils Birthday Celebration*

Active Engagement: Now that weve

selected an important small moment
story, Jamills birthday celebration, lets
work together to develop my writing on
draft paper. So this is how I started my
story[read draft]

2. Thumbs up if you think I can

draft this story as a seed, as a
personal narrative that reflects a
real experience that happened in
my life. Check in with kids whose
thumbs are up and ask them to
explain their thinking. Take this
opportunity to try and clarify the
meaning of personal narrative.

Turn and Talks: Listening for students

sharing ideas about potential hooks.
(What strategies are they using here? Are
they describing the setting, asking the
reader a question, using a sound word?
How are they hooking the reader?)

Turn and Talks:

1. Lead
2. Elaboration (5 sentences)
3. Conclusion
Link: Students will then be dismissed
from the meeting area to choose an entry
or seed idea from their writers journal to
develop further on draft paper, making
sure not to copy word for word, but to

Are students using their learned strategies

to elaborate on sentences? Ie. adding
details w 5/ senses, elaborating with
action, thoughts or feelings. What
strategies are students using?
Student Drafts:
-Did the student move his/her story from
notebook onto draft paper?
-Did the student make any revisions, or

use the strategies discussed in the lesson did he/she copy directly from source?
-Is there evidence of strategy application
between writing pieces?
-What are students using?
-What are students not using?
Finishing It
How will you bring students
to closure with this learning
experience and connect it to
future learning?

Accessibility

Revisit teaching point: When you draft,

you move out of your notebook and
develop your stories on special draft
paper, revising by adding details, sound
words, action or dialogue as you go. You
dont copy word for word what is in your
notebook. Instead, you think about the
story as you go, and try to make it better.
In order to make a story better, you have
to breathe life into it.

If you understand what you are doing,

give me a thumbs up. If youd like some
clarification and support, lets stay at the
meeting area.

In this lesson, I have considered that some students are not yet grasping the concept

What accessibility and

of seed stories, so I have sequenced instruction to begin with a review in which I
participation challenges have
you taken into account and use the image of a watermelon to depict the process of selecting seed stories, before
how have you addressed
moving on to classify examples on a T-Chart. I use student work to reference
them? (material and human
examples, and a shared text, roller coaster, to re-enforce this point. For the
resources, sequence of
demonstration portion of the lesson, I use a doc cam to display a piece of writing.
instruction)

The topic I chose to write about was something we experienced together as a class
the day before, so that all students feel included and are not limited in their
participation. I also remind students of the strategies they can use in order to
participate in the active engagement piece, naming them (5 senses) and choosing an
example pulled from their notebooks (Josiah thought about how the popcorn
tasted), strategically weaving in students who might need to be refocused. Lastly, I
differentiate the draft paper for the students who may feel intimidated by the lines
on the loose-leaf paper.
Materials Needed

Chart Paper, Markers, Doc Cam, Writing Notebook and Differentiated Draft Paper