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Midterm Reflection Essay

This essay was surely not as easy as I thought it would be. I knew I was going to struggle
because writing has never been one of my greatest strengths. I always find myself with writers
block, struggling to put my thoughts onto paper. Regardless, I feel pretty good with my overall
product. In the end, it was pretty much what I had envisioned when we went over the prompt. I
think what both succeeded and proved problematic in my opinion was how broad the prompt
was. I think it succeeded because as a class we werent limited to what we could write, given the
freedom. But at the same time because it was so broad, it led me to several doubts and questions
as to what would or wouldnt be considered appropriate. Personally, I have been so used to
having some sort of checklist or rubric to abide to when going through the process. Having those
guidelines not only served as a visual representation as to what exactly I needed to get a good
grade, but as well served as an actual structural guide for what my essay was going to consist of.
If I were to write the essay again, I think I would have gathered more quotes and actually
have taken the time to really think out what the author was trying to say with each word or
phrase. I feel that if someone has a substantial amount of evidence to back up a claim, the
argumentation of it all flows more naturally and one isnt found to be stumped as to what to say
next. It as well helps for one to actually meet the page count instead of thinking what to say next
just to fill up the space.
Regarding the peer review results, I dont feel as if I got the proper feedback, at least the
feedback I was hoping to receive. But then again, I dont think students are in a position in which
they feel completely confident suggesting certain things on other peoples work, when they
themselves are not as confident with their own paper. That is at least how I feel when reviewing
others work. Past experiences have as well proven that only if when you and your peer have a
close relationship, the feedback ends up being more helpful because of the fact that they are not
too shy or uncomfortable to suggest certain things. Therefore, if I wasnt paired up with one of
my closest friends, I felt like I would always come out benefitting more from the actual
instructor reviewing my work instead of just any peer.
One of my greatest improvements would have to be accepting the fact that the character
is not real and having to focus on the audiences reaction. As minimal as it may sound, it was a
drastic change from my high school writing to my first college essay. I will definitely use this for
future essays. From this process, I as well learned a helpful technique to not only maintain the
consistency of my thesis throughout, but as well maintain the coherence of my essay as a whole
and that is listing my thesis and main topic sentences to make it easier to see whether or not they
transition properly.

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Alondra Perez
Professor McClure
Writing 39B
7 November 2015
Richard Matheson: I Am Legend
New York Times Bestseller, I am Legend, is written by award-winning author and
accredited screenwriter, Richard Matheson. The novel centers around the popularized notion of
the last man standing on earth, in response to a worldwide apocalyptic tribulation, in which
Robert Neville, finds himself surrounded by thirsty, blood-sucking vampires. The reader is given
the impression that the main character, unlike the unfortunate infected, is ironically the only one
victimized in this case, by societys deadly misfortune. As the novel progresses, the divergence
between good and evil slowly becomes highly ambiguous and less of an apparent conviction, as
Neville is seen to objectify and invasively disrespect the vampires, depicting them as nothing
more than savage, pitiless monstrosities. In respect to the establishment of Nevilles
discriminatory actions, Matheson is able to use I Am Legend to further argue and convince the
audience of societys inevitable and reoccurring negation to accept the differences among races,
more specifically the people of color. Passages throughout the novel, including the extensive use
of metaphors, obscure tone, and invidious diction, further hint and give the impression that
Neville in reality is the true monster in respect to his invasive, disrespectful manner. The
reoccurring theme of hostility that is observed through Nevilles rejection to acknowledge his
own violent crimes against the other race, allows for Matheson to further challenge the reader to
criticize their own discriminatory behavior when dealing with racial diversity. By exploring these
assertions and applying the historical context of the novel, it is evident that Matheson intended to

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bring to light the societal issue of people failing to acknowledge their own highly apparent,
discriminatory behavior, which only causes discrimination to remain relevant to this day, as seen
just a year ago in Ferguson, Missouri.
Surrounded in a world full of monsters, Neville is observed as the biggest monster of
them all, with his antagonistic perception towards the infected, serving as a metaphor to mirror
the preconceived mentality of the racist community. As Matheson says, His concept of the
society had become ironbound. It was almost impossible for him to believe that there were others
like him. And, after the first shock had diminished, all the dogma of his long years alone had
asserted itself (115). The vampires are despicable and impossible to be considered human
like him. Neville ignores the indisputable fact that all the vampires were at one point, exactly
like him. Nevilles negation to admit to their helplessness and contaminated selves, allows
Matheson to further establish the distinction and tension for the reader between the two so-called
races in the novel, as the play on words argues that it is impossible to classify the two to belong
in the same breed. Referring to the vampires as others, as well further allows for the audience to
pick up on Nevilles more than obvious antipathy towards them. Given the circumstance, Neville
is automatically assumed to be the victimized, therefore expected to share such disgust.
Nonetheless, being the sole survivor isnt enough to justify his own stripping of ethics and
morals for the purpose of being ravenous for survival. The orderly tone the statement is written
in, can serve as juxtaposition between Nevilles sophistication in comparison to the infected
humans naivet. This distinction is clear through the usage of a calm, voice of reason. This
allows for the audience to pick up on the hinted resemblance of Nevilles intolerance with the
victimized individuals around him and societys unjust demeanor when attempting to justify their
own apprehension towards people of color. Like Neville, racists of today are unware of their own

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negligence. The disrespectful manner they address and treat people with, is not the same manner
either character or individual expects to be treated in return. Given the difference in superiority
Matheson has established between Neville and the vampires, it is unmistakably clear that his
intention is to intelligently play on that very sensitive topic of racial tension, deeply rooted in
American history and culture.
Coincidentally enough, the injustices society faces with today and has faced for years
regarding races, mirrors the degrading treatment Neville instinctively justifies and practices
within his own society, ultimately framing the overall impression that he is the true monster.
Analyzing Nevilles hostile actions in the historical/cultural lens, allows for the audience to
further scrutinize their own obliviousness when it comes down to their own obvious
discriminatory actions. In this case, Neville justifies all his actions and violent crimes as
necessary as, Instead he had been forced to tug and cajole and argue and scold while she held
back hed been compelled to take her in the bedroom and lock her in (115). The use of the
word compelled delivers that same notion that the action was necessary, leaving him with no
choice. The use of the word compelled, serves as justification for the discrimination. Matheson
cleverly ignores the use of commas and repetitively uses the word and, to build the overall
suspense and tension that comes about when Neville comes into contact with another individual,
more specifically a woman. The tension keeps growing when Matheson fails to include any sign
of remorse, compassion, or kindness the moment Neville is seen to forcefully lock up the woman
like an animal, despite her desperate pleas for him to stop. This predatorily scene allows for the
audience to question how Nevilles actions are indeed any different from a monster themselves.
Because Nevilles nature is to act quick, instinctively, and with no conscience, the predatory tone
that is present in this piece of evidence, frames the conclusion for the reader, that Neville is

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indeed no different than a true monster. Therefore, Nevilles inability to be sympathetic when
coming into contact with what could be the only hope for survival and mankind, is fundamental
to the overall argument of him being the true monster.
It is possible to believe that Matheson intentionally included the apocalyptic tribulation
and vampires to challenge readers to stray away from the obvious good and evil, and really
scrutinize the idea of who is the intended monster for the purpose of realization and assertion.
Having the vampires as a sort of distraction, allows for Matheson to subtly portray and hint at the
idea that Neville is the true monster, all while strengthening his claim that we fail to realize how
humanly wrong we can be towards one another, because of the denial to accept that any type of
segregation is a critical issue. We tend to ignore the fact that any disrespect towards another
individual, resembles the same disrespectful manner monsters in any novel or film exercise. It is
the same uncompassionate and threatening, ethics and morals, that put racist individuals at the
same level of monsters, Neville serving as a metaphor for it all.
The inability to accept differences among races as observed through Nevilles manners,
continues to be an issue to this day not only because of the constant failure to treat others with
respect, but due to the lack of realization that the discriminatory manner is being employed in the
first place, as seen in police brutality on August 9, 2014, when a young black male, Michael
Brown was killed by white officer, Darren Wilson. Outrage spurred and differences surfaced the
moment the world was made aware of what had just occurred. According to the online forum
titled Black Lives Matter, Browns death was another symbol of years of racial bias by the
towns police against black residents. This incident is only one of many, that has generated
outrage for the continual mistreatment black people specifically, continue to face throughout
history. This moment sparked hundreds of riots and protests, as witnesses claimed that his hands

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were raised in surrender the moment the officer decided to take the shot. Yet, thousands of
individuals across the country rose up defending the incident and justifying Officer Darren
Wilsons brutality as a necessary self-defense move, once again sparking the already existing
tensions between the black and white community. Police brutality regarding racial minorities,
continues to only trigger the already deeply-rooted racist encounters history has exhibited over
the years with the most predominant segregation of our time between blacks and whites.
These racist encounters, like I had mentioned before, mirror the exact racist behavior
Neville preaches toward the infected, as in the end, that fine line between respect and what is
considered a necessary act, has been hazy throughout the years. There is no real difference
between the characters attitude and societys attitude regarding discrimination. As Dan Frosch
and Scott Calvert also state in the Wall Street Journal, still, African-Americans and whites are
sharply divided on the main cause of the civil unrest a majority of whites chose a second
possible explanation: people seeking an excuse to engage in looting and violence. This
demonstrates the continual division in public attitudes in regards to racial division, as white
people continue to justify the mistreatment towards the people of color as just a simple excuse
for violence. Once again black people are targeted as the violent individuals, incapable of being
the least bit rational, and the white people serving as targeted victims in their hands for simply
defending what they believe is acceptable. For this reason, Matheson intended to subtly hint at
Nevilles monstrous ways in hopes of challenging readers to soon realize the nonexistent
difference between the evident societal issue we have grown to mask. Whether it be in
Mathesons fictional character portrayal and his degrading attitude in I Am Legend, or societys
continual oppression against any people of color, there is no valid difference.

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Even though the claim may seem a bit far stretched to argue that it was Mathesons
purpose to highlight the negligence of racist views and remarks, through his portrayal of the last
man standing, it is still quite possible to argue such interpretation because of the lack of
acceptance and accordance to realize who is truly at fault. This justification isnt new nor will it
be for future generations if society continues to fail and recognize the discrimination being done
in the first place. It is comments like the ones made above about black people retaliating for the
sole purpose of being violent, infuriates me personally because I have yet to understand why a
race is needed to be depicted as the violent one, or maltreated one, or superior one. There always
has to be an excuse or believed justification to the maltreatment towards individuals. It makes
even less sense that an individual has to face such treatment for a characteristic he/she is unable
to have control over. It is troubling to accept the fact that there will always be individuals whom
will reject the idea of equality. But like Neville, people are too arrogant to realize that everyone
is entitled to the same respect he/she wishes to be treated with. And like Neville, the justification
towards such disrespect is going to continue to be validated for the purpose of maintaining a
clear conscience, denying any possibility they could be at fault. Will we indeed be able to see
peace and equality until our world is faced with a total societal breakdown, such as an
apocalypse to have us then recognize our faults? Can it be that Neville was then not just serving
as a metaphor for such negligence, but as well serving symbol for a newfound hope for another
world. A new world in which no one is discriminated or segregated because of the color of their
skin or way of being.

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Works Citied
Cullors, Patrisse, Opal Tometi, and Alicia Garza. "Ferguson, 1 Year Later: Why Protesters Were
Right to Fight for Mike Brown Jr.Black Lives Matter." Black Lives Matter RSS2.
BlackLivesMatter, n.d. Web. 03 Nov. 2015.
Frosch, Dan, and Scott Calvert. "A Year After Ferguson, 'Black Lives Matter' Still Wields
Influence." WSJ. The Wall Street Journal, 9 Aug. 2015. Web. 03 Nov. 2015.
Matheson, Richard. I Am Legend. New York: ORB, 1995. Print.

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Portfolio Selections
This selection is quite significant because it is one of my very first pieces of writing that I
accomplished starting my first year in college. I chose this assignment specifically because it is
the assignment in which we were given the chance to show our level of argumentation through
our interpretation of two music videos. After receiving feedback, I was only able to make my
topic sentences and argumentations stronger.
RA: Reznor/Cash Response Revision
The most prominent theme that stood out to me the most in the Reznor video was death
and the deep anguish that correlates, as pain and misery were only a few reoccurring state of
minds that appeared in the images. The artist began singing about finding himself at a hopeless
end, I hurt myself today, to see if I still feel. I focus on the pain. The only thing thats real. If
pain is the only thing that appears or feels real, then it may be safe to assume that the severity of
the emotional state he finds himself resembles death. The overall mood of the video was very
dark, somber, and painful. What automatically set this mournful mood, and the idea that pain is
the only thing thats real, was the first image of the decaying wolf. The wolf finds himself at
his end, his undeniable death, and the showing of his misfortune allows for the audience to
further assume the artist feels the same way. The later on images of decay in the land and plants,
as well as the numerous amount of dead bodies that appeared laying on the floor surely sent me
to think that the video as well as the artist was found to be in a state of demise. The quick flash
image of the wounded soldier stood out to me the most because instead of just focusing on dead
bodies to portray death, the image that the soldier was wounded at war hints at the idea that he
either was close to death himself, or was found to be surrounded by death all around, which in
the end serves as the perfect representation of how the artist felt insidedead. Even when the
simple image of the mother with her child appeared, I was able to observe the pain in the
mothers face, as if affected by some sort of loss or anguish. Every image seemed like it was
building up to that critical state of emotion and mind; the coming to an end.
Even though the theme of rebirth was not as dominant as death in this case, I believe that
without the representation or presence of rebirth in the video, the lyrics at the end would have not
been justified to their full extent, If I could start again, a million miles away, I would keep
myself, I would find a way. The last part is so powerful and meaningful because it hints that if
he had another chance, he may have been able to push through, experience his own rebirth. It
was clever to commence the video with the decaying wolf and end it with the same wolf
resurrecting to portray the very idea of rebirth. Even through the misery and portrayal of death,
there is still that sliver of hope for another life, another chance. Deep down there is still that
hidden underlying will to power through. Just like the final images of the bird finally capturing
the fish, symbolizes death or the end to the pain, but as well the start or rebirth for something
new.
Given the difference in circumstances, Cashs video was not as emotionally drive as
Reznors, as instead of focusing on death, he focused more on the emptiness of reality due to the
fame and fortune. It seems that he is regretful to have let it get to that point because of the sorrow
expression on his face that continued to be present throughout the video. The moment before he
sings What have I become? there is a flashback of a young man happily riding a train, possibly
serving reminder that his once bliss, has lead him to become unrecognizable. The images of the

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broken records and closed down museums both serve as remembrance to the once fame, but
serve as a reminder that they were as well a cause to the destruction upon his personal life; hence
why they are broken and abandoned. The scene in which he is found alone at the table filled with
all the food singing, I wear this crown of thorns, shows that even all the riches and prosperity
werent worth the absence or loss of his loved ones. The crown signifying the fame, and thorns
hes been stabbed with as a result of the fame. The constant flashbacks to a couple and smiling
woman express not only the nostalgic mood, but the idea that he indeed is hurting due to a
heartbreak. It almost seems like he is saying that he would be willing to sacrifice anything if he
were given another chance. The images of crosses and Jesus Christ suffering were the main two
which allowed me to make this claim.
I most definitely found the first video though to be more powerful just because I feel like
when more somber or darker feelings are associated, the more effective the use of pathos are and
the more the audience is able to empathize. Given the fact that the video was so emotionally
driven with the varying dark images, the video was able to successfully give off that much of a
stronger response. A serious tone will not always overpower the effect of a lighter tone as the
content and context play a key role in deciding that, but given the circumstance with the lyrics
and videos, I believe the first video successfully depicted the powerful emotions.

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This next piece of writing had to be one of the top ones that I found myself struggling the
most to write. Yet, it was one of the most interesting pieces of writing given the fact that we had
to create our own monster. It was difficult because I have never been a fanatic of horror nor have
I ever really read anything pertaining to the horror genre. Regardless, I had fun thinking all dark
and twisted and how I thought I would be as a monster, based on my personality. This piece
surely pushed me out of of comfort zone and I dont believe I did such a horrid job for my first
time.
RIP: My Own Monstrosity
If I was, by some unfortunate turn of fate, transformed into a horrible, impure beast, Id
be like so. My fragile, yet unbreakable, mirror-like skin is the first to catch both grotesque and
pure creatures attention. The attention given is always completely inevitable, as the only color
that shines is my bright blue cat-like eyes. Dark, gory, shapeless images uninvitingly flash all
over my body. Pain, disgust, and horror scream through the projection of my images. The images
are a reflection of your worst nightmares, your worst fears, and your worst self. My only form of
communication is the sliming, black poisonous tongues that slug in and out through the cracks of
my skin, alluring curious eyes to stray and remain locked. My voice has two sides to it as it can
either be received as a screeching, gut-wrenching sound when riled or as an enticing, cryptic
whisper. Those who lamentably are enticed by my gaze, wonder why all their lies, betrayal, and
sinful mistakes they had ever made, suddenly comes rushing to their mind and heart like a raging
stampede wanting to rip their insides out. They are trapped.
Because I was also given the ability to become invisible, there is no trouble hiding and
lingering in the darkest of corners. In plain sight, it has already become of second nature to
assume a shape of an oppressing owl. There is no need to hide, when I know what is being kept
hidden. All my preys I find and have caught were alone because that is the moment when found
to be the most vulnerable and most distressed. However, I will never chase or go after someone,
as they always unknowingly come to me as if in search of something. My eyes have the ability to
shoot out raging, sharp, black tongues that pierce into other creatures eyes, with the intention of
ripping out their brain first, then heart, and lastly soul. But first, my irresistibly shining dark skin
is made up of thousands of microscopic jagged teeth that invites my prey to unwillingly lay their
hands on. It is comedic to see the instant flash of excruciating pain that shoots straight through
their body, while I invite myself into their head, as well as their body and whisper in their ears
that there is nothing to be afraid of. This is more for my own sinister pleasure and inner peace
since this is the only way I ever find myself accompanied. My ripping and cutting up of both
their brains and hearts is more than just pleasure, but a necessity. All the sinful memories that
come with the brain and heart fuel my deceitful wisdom. It is my purpose to inflict pain and
suffering onto those who have caused the pain. However, it as well enhances my energy and the
intensity of the dark wandering images that flash upon my body.
Though I am not nocturnal, something about the dark nature of nighttime, again, fuels my
will to hunt out the shameful. Sleep is for the weak, something my monster or I surely are not. It
is as well, the prefect time to allow for all monsters, like myself, to come out and play.

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Like my previous selection, this one is just as twisted and disturbing, as in this case I was
given the chance to consider the mind of my monster. Describing the appearance and personality
is one thing, but actually describing the sick thoughts of such impurity is another thing. The
thought process to construct such mentality was again a struggle in its own, but having to imitate
the structure and voice of such an interesting author like Gaitskill was twice as difficult. Yet, I
believe the imitation only proved to be successful because we were given a piece to feed off of
when writing our own short story. I learned that sometimes pieces of writing dont need to
consist of such complex sentences in order to deliver the same powerful notion or effect.
RIP: The Other Place Imitation:
I find violence aesthetically pleasing. I love to see people in excruciating pain. I love to hear the
fear in the voice, see the fear in their eyes, feel the fear in their bones. I love to see how quick
living souls become lifeless. If youre curious, I once broke my killing record and got it down to
0.5 seconds. But of course, I dont think its appropriate to flaunt off your strengths. Watching
thick blood drip down slowly is always fun, and when it splatters even better. The sorry, petrified
look they give me when I am about to rip their brains out, almost gets to me, almost. Naturally,
people will cry and wail at the site of danger. People can be so funny. Why do they yell?
Obviously the scream will go unheard if we are the only two souls standing around. Why am I
like this? The way everyone is silly, I was born this way.
Like my father, I am fine built, hollow eyes, with jet-black tongues sliming around. We are proud
to say we have the finest of jagged teeth for skin in the valley. I am interested in the brain
because I once heard that when a person is pronounced dead, even though the heart fails, the
brain continues to scramble for nutrients and oxygen. Growing up, I would execute beautiful
drawings of lifeless bodies with their brains hanging out. However, now that Ive matured, I
much rather have them in person than on paper.
My mother does not see a problem with my favorite past time. She said as long as I am not
selfish and occasionally share my killings with them, I am fine. I dont doubt she shares the same
fascination and pleasure I experience when I play with my prey. We dont talk much, but when
we do, its that similar pleasure we share that makes me feel connected to her.
I have lived a rather normal life. I grew up and rapidly arrived to that point where killings and
brutality excited me. Like I said, blood excites me like no other. My father would be outside
playing with his big boy toys, trying to match different heads with different bodies and see
what new creations he would make. My mother, would be inside the cave washing and preparing
the guts for lunch and my mind would wander off to my happy place in which I envisioned
ripping countless of bodies to bits. I grew up passively watching killers and yearned to become
one.
You might think that my nature was encouraged or influenced by my parents, but not once did I
feel pressured by them. I was just a bit embarrassed to let them know that I had thoughts of guys
being cut up and eaten at such a young age. These images took me someplace that no one was or
had been capable of doing. There was no peace or love or unity or respect, and it was great.
Ive told my parents of my murder fantasies. I have even shown them a very special, intimate
photograph of my first killing and I; blood dripping everywhere, the body cut in half, with his
heart specifically protruding out to give it that extra sense of fulfillment. The broken face and
body will be one of the images I will forever keep close to my heart. Even if it fades, I know it
will always make me feel some type of way.

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Even thought this specific selection lacks a bit more in-depth analysis, it is with this
assignment that I learned how to apply abstract reasoning when arguing what was the true
monster in Kristoffer Aaron Morgans short film. It was most definitely not obvious as we had to
make a claim on how the monster was working metaphorically. This assignment shows my
process over the quarter when creating and sticking to one claim based on the evidence provided,
which ultimately led to the creation of our final RA draft.
No Way Out Response:
Thesis: In Kristoffer Aaron Morgans short film, No Way Out, the monster isnt necessarily the
one that appears to be tormenting him, it is himself. The final outcome should be interpreted as
his last battle with his own mind, thoughts, worries, beliefs, and fears. But in order to be be
exonerated and set free, he must sacrifice everything hes got.
-Instead of facing the monster, which in this case symbolizes his own battles and fears, he
chooses his last resort; and gives up.
-Even though it is typical to associate a white light at the end of a tunnel as a positive
representation, I believe in this case, it represents the devils potency to lure in his own prey.
-Life is a constant battle that preys on the mentally weak, and its victims are those who are
unable to fall into depressions trap.
-In the end, it is evident that even when one makes the sacrifice, one never truly escapes the
darkness reigns, but it was until he gave up his brain that he came to the realization.
The reality is, that even though our battles and low points appear to be eternal, we must accept
the fact that the solution is never easy. It is confronting our fears and monsters the right way, that
will in the end guide us to that light of tranquility. Our mind has the ability to overpower and
influence our life in the worst of way and best of ways. We are the ones who decide whether or
not we wish to allow our mind become our own monster.

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