Alexis Stanley

Ms. McCampbell
ENGL 101
November 10, 2015
Essay 3
Alexis Your essay shows tremendous progress in constructing an essay! You also did a decent
job of using researched information. Even your grammatical and mechanical errors are making
gains.
Distracted Driving 112/135
What is the most important rule drivers should remember when driving? The most
important rule drivers should remember is to stay focus on the road. But this rule is not always
enforced. There is always a distraction in a drivers car, but it is up to them to ignore the
distractions. Distracted driving can lead to accidents which can cause devastating injuries or
death.

Photo by Navideck.com (Distracted Driving Raises)

The image above shows a person driving distracted. This person seems to be a man
driving by the masculine structure of his hands. He has too many things in his hands to hold the
wheel. He is trying to hold a burger and a drink, send a text message, and drive at the same time.
All of the distractions in his hands are going to make him hit the boy on the bike. The boy seems
to be around the age of seven to nine years old. He is wearing the proper gear for a bike. He has
on a helmet and a pair of tennis, so the main parts of his body are protected. But the boy looks
frightened and shocked that this car could hit him at any second. The man driving should be
paying attention to the road, so that he can prevent the accident from happening. Distracted
driving is the cause of most accidents as we can see in the picture.
One way drivers can be distracted is by the use of technology. The main source of
technology that distracts drivers is a cellphone. A cellphone can be a big distraction because
drivers will take their eyes off the road to look at social media and text messages, or make calls.
For an example, an older lady is in her car waiting patiently for a traffic light to change, and a
teen girl is in her car sending text messages. The lady is closer to the curb, and the girl is in the
middle lane of the highway. When the light turns green the cars behind the girl beep their horns,
and the girl starts driving while she is still looking at her phone. This action makes her swerve
into the ladys lane, and hit the side of the ladys car. This example shows how dangerous
technology can be while driving. In the article 10 Deadliest Driving Distractions, Christina
Bramlet states the statistics of texting while driving. Christina Bramlet is an author who
graduated from the University of Cincinnati with a B.A. in English Literature, and has ten years

of professional writing and editing experience. Bramlet says, texting while driving
causes 1,600,000 accidents per year (National Safety Council); 30,000 injuries per year (Harvard
Center for Risk Analysis Study); and 11 teen deaths in the U.S. each day (Ins. Institute for Hwy
Safety Fatality Facts) (Bramlet). We have to stop using our cellphones while driving because no
text is worth a life.
Another way drivers can be distracted is with food and beverages. This cause is the worst
form of distracted driving because it is barely recognized, but is very important. There are
several foods that can be a distraction. One distracting food is sloppy joe because it can get
messy. Another distracting food is fried chicken and pizza because they are very greasy. Some
other foods are spaghetti, fettucine, pancakes, eggs, waffles, etc. Those foods need to be eaten
with a utensil. Any type of soft drink or soda can be a distraction. If a drink spills drivers will try
to clean the mess up, but if a can or bottle falls out of a cup holder they will try to pick it up.
Another beverage is coffee. If drivers are taking a sip of coffee while driving, and suddenly stops
the coffee could spill or burn them, and they could lose focus of the road. In the article
Avoiding Traffic Accidents: Eating While Driving, Jim Loxley states the statistics of eating or
drinking while driving. Jim Loxley is a contributor, and director of a company by the name of
My Compensation. This company posts blogs about different subjects. Loxley says, Here at My
Compensation, it certainly surprised us that eating food was by far the biggest culprit as its one
of the least discussed with regards to taking your attention off the road and potentially causing
an accidental collision (Loxley). What does it take for people to learn that eating or drinking
while driving is dangerous? There are several answers to this question and they are accidents,
higher car insurance, penalty points, or conviction. We have to be careful of the decisions we
make while driving.

The final way drivers can be distracted is by driving under the influence. One cause of
driving under the influence is smoking marijuana. For an example, a young male adult is in
college, but he is also trying to make ends meet for his family. His father is not around, so it is
just him, his little sister, and his mother living in an apartment. His mother is having a hard time
providing for her family, so the son steps up and becomes a father-husband figure. He starts
working to help his mother out. He tries to balance college, work, and family but it does not
work out. He becomes stressed out, so he turns to his stress reliever which is marijuana. One
night he decides to smoke marijuana with some friends. After they smoked one of his friends
suggested they go to the store to get some snacks. They get in his mothers car, and the boy
drives to the store. This action is not good for the boy because his mind is not in the right place,
and he should not be driving. Another cause of driving under the influence is drinking alcohol.
For an example, a college girl by the name of Ashley goes to a late night club with a few friends.
She is the designated driver for her and her friends. While at the club she dances, and has several
drinks. As the night comes to an end it is up to the girl to get her and her friends home safe.
Ashleys friend Jasmine did not drink, but she does not feel like driving. She allows Ashley to
drive drunk instead of offering to drive, so that they would arrive to their destination safely.
Ashley gets into an accident with a guy on a motorcycle, and he dies because he got flipped over.
This could have been avoided if Jasmine would have drove them where they needed to go. In the
article Alcohol effects on simulated driving performance and self- perceptions of impairment in
DUI offenders, Nicholas Vandyke and Mark Fillmore states the statistics of driving under the
influence. Nicholas VanDyke and Mark Fillmore are both apart of the Department of Psychology
at the University of Kentucky. VanDyke and Fillmore says, The most recent reports indicate that
alcohol was a factor in 10,322 motor vehicle fatalities in the United States, or an average of one

alcohol related fatality every 51 min (National Highway Traffic Safety Administration, 2013)
(VanDyke, Fillmore). Driving under the influence is not a joke it has to stop now.
Distracted driving can be extremely dangerous, and can cause traumatic injuries or death.
There are various ways that drivers can become distracted and put themselves, passengers, and
pedestrians in harms way. Drivers should pay attention and drive safely on the road. People who
drive carefully can prevent accidents from happening and save lives.

Work Cited
DISTRACTED DRIVING RAISES PEDESTRIAN FATALITIES BY 30%. navideck.
Navideck. 20 December 2013. Web. 18 November 2015.
Bramlet, Christina. 10 Deadliest Driving Distractions. Property Casualty360. ALM Media,
LLC. 11 April 2013. Web. 17 November 2015.
Loxley, Jim. Avoiding Traffic Accidents: Eating While Driving. mondaq. Mondaq Ltd. 8
January 2013. Web. 18 November 2015.
VanDyke, Nicholas, and Mark T. Fillmore. Alcohol effects on simulated driving performance
and self- perceptions of impairment in DUI offenders. Experimental And Clinical
Psychopharmacology 22.6(2014): 484-493. PsycArticles. 1 December 2014. Web. 18
November 2015 .
General Education Rubric: English 101/102: College Composition I/II

General
Education
Competency

Written and
Oral
Communicatio
n 58

Related
Assignment
Requirement
5 points
10 points
Introduction 5
points 4
Thesis 10
points 8

4
Exemplary
Exceeds
Expectations
5 points
9 - 10
Presents a unified
central idea that is
supported by
exceptional
evidence and

3
Accomplished
Meets Expectations
3 4 points
6 - 8 points
Presents a unified central
idea that is supported by
relevant evidence.

2
Developing
Approaches
Expectations
2 points
3 5 points
Presents a unified central
idea that is supported by
adequate evidence.

Uses a logical order for

Uses a logical order for

Do
un
do
ad

Conclusion 5
points 3

displays unusual
insight.

Structure
(including TS)
10 points 10

Uses a logical
order for
paragraphs and
presents them in
an interesting or
original manner.

Coherence 10
points
10
Errors 1 point
per error -8/2
= -4=16

Diction/clarity
10 points7

Image
description
and analysis
9

Critical
Analysis and
Reasoning 17

10 points

Describe
features of the
image and
analyze their
significance to
the social or
cultural impact
which leads to
your research
into a broader
topic.
NOTE: this
description and
analysis sets the
stage for your
informed opinion
(thesis) which is
supported by
thoughtful
research and
reasoning.
20 points
Argue for your
position by
generating
reasons and
providing
evidence for
your views.

paragraphs.

paragraphs.

Free of errors in
usage/mechanics, but for
minor errors which do not
impede meaning.

Contains some major

grammatical or usage
errors or many minor
errors.

Style reflects appropriate

vocabulary and varied
sentence patterns.

Style may include

imprecise diction,
ineffective transitions,
and unvaried sentence
patterns.

68

35

Identifies more
than three
features of the
image, describes
them in the
context of the
broader
researched topic
and shows a
thoughtful
connection
between the
images features
and how they
reflect the specific
issues related to
your thesis and
subsequent
research.

Identifies three features

of image and describes
them in detail. The
description leads to
interpretation of their
significance to a broader
social or cultural issue
which you will present a
well-developed thesis,
supported by expert
evidence and insightful
reasoning.

Identifies one or two

features and describes
them. There may be
some interpretation
which will lead to
identifying a broader
social or cultural issue,
but the connection is not
made explicit. There
may be a general
reference to a thesis
which will be supported
with researched
evidence.

Ge
wh
wh
Th
me
ma
lar
iss
int
fea
mi

17 20 points
Ideas are
thoroughly
developed and
presented in a
logical manner
that is easy to
follow with clear

13 16 points
Ideas are developed and
presented in a logical
manner that is easy to
follow with clear
reasoning.

8 12 points
Ideas are mostly
developed and presented
in a mostly logical
manner that is easy to
follow.

0
Ide
an
or
fol

Displays moderate depth

Displays an attempt at

Free of errors in
usage/mechanics,
but for minor
errors which do
not impede
meaning.
Style reflects
precise and vivid
vocabulary and
varied sentence
patterns.
9 10

Ha
or

Co
gr
er
er

St
im
ine
an
pa

Di
illo

Details/RENNS;
at least three
are cited
20 points

Information
Literacy 16

5 points
Use a minimum
of three
academically
appropriate
secondary
sources in
addition to any
assigned
primary
source/s. 5
points 4

Demonstrate
academic
integrity through
source
integration and
documentation.
5 points4

5 points 3

5 points 5

Technological
Competence
10

The inserted
object should be
relevant to the
content of the
essay and
should be placed
thoughtfully
within the
essay. 5
points5

reasoning.
Displays insightful,
in-depth reasoning
and depth of
thought.
5 points
Exceeds the
number of
required sources;
sources meet the
highest standards
for credibility and
relevance.

Source information
is introduced with
appropriate
qualifiers and
accompanied by
comments
clarifying its
relevance to thesis
support.
Source information
is smoothly and
effectively
paraphrased,
summarized, or
quoted.
Sources are
correctly
documented in
parenthetical
citation and on a
Works Cited page
or Bibliography as
appropriate to the
style format in
use.
The inserted
object is especially
suited/ related to
the essay thesis or
other content, and
the object
placement is
smoothly
integrated without
any visual
awkwardness.

in reasoning and thought.

depth in thought.

3 4 points
Incorporates the required
number of sources;
sources meet minimum
standards for credibility
and relevance.

2 points
Incorporates the required
number of sources; some
sources do not meet
minimum standards for
credibility and/or
relevance.

Inc
th
so
so
sta
an

Source information is
introduced with qualifiers
and sometimes
accompanied by
comments clarifying its
relevance to thesis
development.

Source information is
simply inserted with
qualifiers or other
attempts at source
integration; source
relevance to thesis
development is
sometimes unclear.

So
sim
qu
at
int
so
th
un

Attempts are made, but

sources are not correctly
documented in
parenthetical citation and
on a Works Cited page or
Bibliography as
appropriate to the style
format in use.

So
un
pa
Wo
cit

The inserted object

clearly relates to the
essay thesis or other
content, and the object
placement is smoothly
integrated without any
visual awkwardness.

The inserted object has

marginal connection to
the essay thesis or other
content, or the object
placement lacks smooth
integration in the essay.

Th
litt
th
co
ha
th
no
th

Document format follows

style guidelines with only

Document format follows

style guidelines with only

Do
sty

Source information is
sometimes paraphrased
or summarized, not
exclusively quoted.
Sources are correctly
documented in
parenthetical citation and
on a Works Cited page or
Bibliography as
appropriate to the style
format in use.

Local and
Global
Diversity 2

Use appropriate
style format for
essay, including
font and margin
size, as well as
header and page
number location.
5 points 5
In analyzing the
issue, consider
the social,
historical, and/or
political factors
at play.
5 points

one minor alteration.

minor departures.

so

Includes references to
social/historical/political
factors and shows
moderate/acceptable
depth or development in
analyzing those factors.

Includes reference(s) to
social/historical/political
factors but shows little
depth or development in
analyzing those factors.

Inc
so
fac
lac
re

Document format
follows style
guidelines
perfectly.

Includes
thoughtful and
insightful analysis
that demonstrates
an aware-ness of
social/historical/
political factors.