HannahQuintanilla

DerekHenson
ELA
September24,2015

T.A.MUnitQuestion1

Howcanweprovethatwhatwebelieveorsayistrue?Sometimeswetryto
explainwhatwewanttosay,butitishardbecauseitisperspectiveandnoonecan
readourmind.Manytimesyourperspectivetowardssomethingmaybedifferentfrom
someoneelsesandinthatpersonsmindtheyarerightbecauseIaretheonewho
thoughtit.Evidenceisgivingfactsorinformationfromthemind.Perspectiveis
a
particularattitudetowardorwayofregardingsomething.
Wecanprovethatwesayor
believeistruebyusingevidenceandourperspectivetoshowthefacts.
Inthebook
TwelveAngryMen
byReginaldRose,manyoftheJurorsarefighting
overiftheboyboyisguiltyornot.Thejurorshaddifferentperspectiveandgave
differentevidencelike8,ThisistheapartmentinwhichthekillingtookplaceNow,
theoldmanwasinthebedinthisroom.(pg.39)Juror8gaveevidenceofwhatthe
manwasdoingandhoweverythingbegantowhenthemanheardthefight.Hegave
evidenceandhisperspectiveofwhathesawandwhatactuallyhappenedandthe
evidencehegaveprovesthemandidnotdoeverythinginonlyfifteenseconds.
Inthecourtroomalllotofthementhoughttheyweregoingtoberightbecausetheyall
havedifferentperspectives.

Everyonehasadifferentperspective,foranexampleinourrectangleexercise,
Derekaskedushowmanyrectangleswethoughttherewereinatable.Webelieveda
numberandwhenDereksaidthatwewereallcorrect,itthenoccurredtomethathe
askedhowmanywesaw,nothowmanytherewas.Havingadifferentperspectiveisnot
abadthing,itshowsthewaypeoplearedifferent,likeJuror3alwaysthoughthewas
rightbecausehehadakidandhewasbadbecauseofthatJurorthreethought
somethingtotallydifferent.
Ifweuseourperspectiveandthengiveevidenceitcanhelpmorewithprovinga
pointoraclaim.Inacardvideowesaw,somepeoplesawallofthechangesthatwere
happeningandsomepeopledifferent,thisshowstheperspectivepeoplehaveandthe
peoplewhosaweverythingcanprovewithevidencethateverythingdidchange.Alotof
timespeoplecanbewrongwhentheymakeanargument,butiftheygivealotof
evidenceinwhattheyaretryingtosay,thenitshowstheyhaveprettygoodperspective
onwhatisgoingonandtheyunderstand.
Thisessayshowswecanprovethatwesayorbelieveistruebyusingevidence
andourperspectivetoshowthefacts.Alotofpeoplethinkthereisonlyoneanswerto
everythingandmostofthetimetheythinktheyaretherightonebecauseitisintheir
heads,butlikeJuror3havingexperiencesisalwaysthecase,itisgivingeverypieceof
evidencesomeonehasandusingitthetherightway.Usingevidence

and

perspective
helpswithshowingwhatyouaretalkingaboutandmakingsurethereaderknowswhat
youaresaying,(question,lesson,cas,etc.)andnomatterhowharditisitwillalways
helpwithwhattheyaretryingtosayandexplaintothereader.

Introduction
AIntroducesreadertoyourpapercatchestheirinterestinsomeway
BClear,concise,andrelevantclaim(thesis)

A3
B2.5

Comments:Youusuallywanttoendyourintrowiththethesis.
BodyParagraphs
AClear,concises,relevanttopicsentences
BContexthelpsreaderunderstandevidence
CStrong,clear,relevantevidencetosupporttopicsentenceandthesis
DAnalysisthatclearlyexplainsHOWyourevidence/examplesupportsyour
topicsentenceandthesis

A1.5
B2
C2
D1(2)

Comments:Thetopicsentenceinyour4thparagraphisstrongbecauseitstatessomething
thatrelatestoyourthesis.Thetopicsentencesinthe2ndand3rdPPsjuststatewhatis
happeningintheplaythatworkswellascontext,butnotasatopicsentence.
Conclusion
ARestateyourthesisinsomewayasyouwrapupyouressay
BLeavethereaderwithsomethingtotakeawaythatisrelevanttotheirown
life(whatshouldtheylearnorrememberfromreadingyourpaper?)

A3
B3

Comments:
Conventions
ALimitmistakes
Spelling
Grammar
Punctuationespeciallycommasplices
Awkwardwording
BOverallclarityandcoherence
Eachsentencemakessense
Eachparagraphmakessense
Theentireessaymakessensealltogether

A1.5

B1

Comments:ThereareseveralplaceswhereIwasconfusedbyyourwording.Readyour
essayslowlyandoutloudtoyourself.Thishelpsyouhearthethingsthatdontsoundquite
right.