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Reviewer(s): Erskine Montgomery

Writer: Darrius pitts

Writing to Investigate a Cause Peer Review
Directions: Answer the following questions in as much detail as possible, quoting or referencing the text
specifically to support your feedback. Focus on striking a balance of supportive and critical feedback.
Authors: list two or three questions or concerns you have about your draft that youd like to discuss with
your group. (Reviewers: Be sure to respond to writers questions here)

1. Point out any confusing sentences or passages and note them here. Were you able to follow the
general direction of the essay easily? Explain how the essay was organized and why it was
effective (or not).
I feel that Darrius us making good inference on his topic because it keeps me interested
the entire time u have been reading.
2. Does the essay clearly describe an effect or phenomenon and its various possible causes?
The essay does describe the entire effect leading up to what caused the events to happen
3. Does the writer utilize sufficient and appropriately scholarly evidence to support his or her
claims? Explain.
Yes, he uses plenty of examples in his writing to explain his topic
4. Does the essay give equal attention to at least two perspectives?
It does not give equal attention because he tempts to focus a little to much on the nfl
compared to the ncaa

Are there quotations from proponents of different causes? In other words, are the different
communities representing themselves in this essay?
There are a few that he presents, but I feel that there could be more

6. Are there sentences or paragraphs that veer off-topic? Explain.
No everything he has written about in his papers on topic

Are the various sources clearly connected? Do the ideas fit together logically and are the
transitions between ideas smooth? Explain.
Each and every point of his paper focus on the exact source of the paper from the start

Strength of Introduction and Conclusion

8. Does the hook create genuine interest? How? And does the introduction provide sufficient context
on the phenomenon? Explain.
I think the topic depends on what your interested in because of the fact of me liking
sports especially football I tend to lean more toward sports so in that case it does strike my

9. Long sentences are fine if they move well, but point out any parts that seem choppy or pretentious
(long and wordy).
There are some parts of his paper where he uses lots of run in sentences
10. Characterize the style: enthusiastic, ponderous, critical, or something totally different. Does it fit
the writers message? Explain. The writer does make sure that his paper is well put to gether
and things are put together well
11. Does the essay cite three appropriately scholarly sources? Does it have in-text citations and a
Works Cited page?
12. Dont do a complete editing job, but do point out the most distracting slips in usage and
mechanics. Summarize the patterns of grammatical error here (ie run-on sentences, spelling, etc.)
13. Note any other questions or feedback you have for the writer here. This is important: since every
paper is unique, they will each have their own successes and concerns that may not be addressed