28 |

JA N 2 9 F E B 1 2 | 2 0 1 6

W W W. S A N TA B A R B A R A S E N T I N E L .CO M

PLANB by Briana Westmacott

ES NOTE by Elliana Westmacott

When Briana isnt lecturing for her writing courses at UCSB and SBCC, she contributes
to The Santa Barbara Skinny, Wake & Wander and Flutter Magazine. Along with her
passion for writing and all things Santa Barbara, much of her time is spent multitasking through her days as a mother, wife, sister, want-to-be chef and travel junky.
Writing is an outlet that ensures mental stability... usually.

ILL PASS ON THE APRON, THANKS

Elliana Westmacott was born and raised in Santa Barbara. She is 10. She loves to
play the piano and soccer. Skiing, swimming in the ocean, reading, and visiting her
Nanas house are some of her favorite things to do. Her family and her dog George
make her happy. So does writing.

BON APPETIT COOKING A SWEET TREAT

Theres the bird I pinned shut. My husband and I both do not look happy about hosting this dinner.

ome people have it. I recently came

to the unwelcome conclusion that I
do not. I cant cook. Im a faux foodie. I
think its time for me to ocially shelve
my culinarian callings.
Im not sure how I was fooled all these
years, because I really did think I was
slightly good at it. Sure, I can cook the
basic stu, and I may have one or two
dishes that are noteworthy. But once
I step beyond the realm of the known
pasta varieties and taco tricks, I ail.
This revelation became blatant last
week when a big box was dropped at
my gate. It was much heavier than
I had expected, its contents and its
lesson. I had anticipated the package,
stued with a complete kit of xings for
dinner. The Blue Aprons website reads
quite nicely; they ship everything you
need to make fabulous meals, right to
your door. No more than a half hour
of preparation. Half an hour sounded
perfect to me. Half an hour was not my
reality.

ITS GETTING HOT IN HERE

I ripped open the box and tied on my
apron. I laid out all the neatly packed
pieces for the meal: farro, salmon,
honey-mustard sauce, broccoli, poblano
peppers, kale, cannellini beans, and
more. There were recipe cards with
step-by-step instructions and pictures
to follow. Doesnt it sound like a piece
of cake? Ha.
Im pretty sure step one took me half
an hour in itself. I pondered: maybe
The Blue Apron did not factor in all

the slicing and dicing I was doing? As I

continued with the detailed instructions,
I got ustered. At times, I panicked.
Kitchen smoke billowed in the air. Pans
were strewn across the counters. When
I went to serve the whole production, I
forgot about the two vegetable dishes I
had set aside warming in the oven two
hours earlier. After more than three
hours and a huge mess, I was exhausted.
It wasnt The Blue Aprons fault; they
provided all the right stu to make a
gourmet meal (which I might add, my
kids didnt even enjoy). I just realized
that I dont belong in the gourmet cook
category.
I should have seen the signs. Lord, I
sewed my Thanksgiving turkey shut
with safety pins this year. The only
reason that bird turned out halfway
edible is due to my moms assistance.
Every time I bake cookies, one pan will
be burnt. Every time. And I am just
as happy with a ten-dollar Trader Joes
bottle of red as I am with the fancy stu.
Both make me smile.

BRIANAS BEST BET

hen I said some people have it,

Brian Congdon would be one of
those people. Hes so good, in fact, that
he has his own catering business, Duo
Catering & Events. So whether you can
cook or not, Brian can hook you up with
an amazing spread that will impress all
the guests at your next dinner party or
event. Why not let the pros go at it?
Contact Brian at: www.duoevents.com

Learning about (and tasting) crepes at a free cooking class offered on Saturdays at Williams-Sonoma

onjour! This note is going to be sweet because it is about cooking. You

probably know the store called Williams-Sonoma. But did you know most
of them have a free cooking class for kids every Saturday? I experienced one class
just to check it out and see what it was like.
I went with a couple of friends. The shop opens at ten oclock. We walked into
the store and instantly I could tell something yummy was cooking. Our instructor,
Alli, was showing us how to make crepes. For all who dont know what crepes are,
they are like pancakes but even better in my opinion. Alli handed out the crepes
and we all ran over to the toppings table. For toppings I would suggest chocolate,
powdered sugar, strawberries, or jam. Basically anything you think would be good
on a pancake would be good in a crepe.
We all got seconds after we nished our rst crepe, which was good for me
because I was dying for another one. They were so tasty! We also got to learn some
really cool facts about crepes, like where they come from in France.
The thing about the Williams-Sonoma lessons is that you get to learn new ways
to cook food, and you get to know where it comes from. Have you ever eaten a
meal and wondered what country it came from? Well, if you have, then WilliamsSonoma can teach you about new foods and dierent countries.
Good at cooking or not, I think this is a way to have fun and learn at the same
time.
Love from,
E

So, Im throwing in the dishtowel.

My malnourished kids and skinny
husband will be forced to continue
to eat burritos and penne with a
vegetable side most nights. In a way,

its liberating. Why not stop trying to

do something that Im not good at and
focus on improving the things that I
am good at? Ive got other talents; they
just arent in the kitchen.