O U T R AG E

AT MORGUE
Body of Society Beauty Stolen
The body of Miss Frances Arneston, who died yesterday at the Radcliffe Infirmary of complications from
brain fever, has vanished from the hospital morgue, according to Dr James
Balder, the forensic clinician on duty.
Balder believes her body was stolen
by one of Miss Arnestons many lovers, deranged by grief at her passing.
The theft occurred last night around 3
a.m., but no witnesses have come forward with descriptions of any strangers seen in the area at that time of
night.
Police speaking privately with this
reporter call our attention to the seemingly co-incidental failure of a hospital
night watchman to report for duty
at his day job, which would seem to
suggest some degree of co-ordination
with the ghoulish abductor. Dr Balder
refused to comment on allegations
that he was asleep or otherwise derelict at the time of the incident, but was
unable to give any other satisfactory
account of how a corpse could simply
vanish from behind a locked door. On
a similar subject, this paper has long
recommended a more intensive examination of the credentials and moral
fitness of those persons given responsibility for the mortal remains of our
loved ones. (See Editorial, page 13)