Getting To Know You Before We Have Sex Application

Copyright 2009-2010 Timothy J. “Yanz” Yancy. All Rights Reserved.
Unauthorized reproduction, distribution, or exhibition of this copyrighted material is strictly prohibited.
Getting to Know You before We have Sex Application (Long Form)

(For Entertainment Purposes Only)
Purpose: To screen potential sexual partners.
Directions: Please read though the questions carefully before answering them. Answer all
questions honestly and to the best of your knowledge.
General Information Section
Last Name: ___________________ First Name _____________ Nick Name _______________
Gender Male __ Female __ Age: ____________ Height Feet ___ Inches___ Weight______ lbs.
Breast Cup Size ____ Waist ______ Hips ______
Endowment: Extra Small __ Small __ Medium __ Large __ Extra Large __ Enormous __
Phone: (____) ____________ e-Mail: ___________________________@ ________._____
Highest Educational Level: 8th Grade or Less __ High School or less___ High School Grad ___
Some College ___ College Degree __ Masters Degree ___ Post Grad ____ Professional __
Occupation: ____________________
Married ____ Single ___ Divorced ___ Separated ___Other____ In A Relationship_____
Sexual Orientation:
Straight ___ Gay ____ Lesbian ___ Bi- Sexual ____ Tri- Sexual (Try Anything) ___
Are you into Sadomaochism(BDSM)? No __ Ye s __ Which One? Sadism ___ Masochism ____
Place a “X” in the correct answer space and write in the answer if applicable.
If more than one answer applies, Check All that Apply
Have you been arrested or convicted of any sex crimes? No __ Yes ___ (If yes, stop here turn in
application)
Do you have any history of serious mental illness? (If yes stop here turn in application)
Did you ever have a sex change operation? No __ Yes __ (If yes stop here turn in application)
For more relationship anecdotes, concepts, help, humor, ideas, jokes, opinions, philosophies, rules, secrets, stories, 1
theories, thoughts, tips and more from A to Z visit me at:www.FaceBook.com/TimmYancy or e-Mail:
YanzEbooks@gmail.com Also available at www.Scribd.com. |
Have you ever been alien abducted and anally probed? No __ Yes __ ( If yes stop here turn in
application)
Do you like having sex with minor kids? No ___ Yes __ ( If yes stop here turn in application
Do you have any sexually transmitted diseases? Yes ( If yes stop here, return appl. ) ___ No ___
What age did you start having sex with someone other than yourself? ____
When was the last time you had sex? Today ___Yesterday ___ Last Week ___ Last Month ___
More than a month ago ___ More than a year ago ___
Do you use birth control? No __ Yes __ What Type ___________
Do you use condoms? Yes __ No __
Ever have any STD’s? No ___ Yes ____ Which Diseases? 1. ______________ 2. ____________
How many sexual partners have you had? 0 __ 1 __ 3 to5 ___ 6 to 10 ___ 10 to 15 ___ 15 to 20
___ 25 to 35 ___ 36 or more __ More than you can remember ____
Are you a premature ejaculator? Yes __ No __
Have you ever been stuck together? Yes ___ No ____
Do you sweat when having sex? Yes ___ No ___
What type of nipples do you have? Pointy ___ Short ___ Stubby ___ Inverted ___
What type of pubic hair do you have? Shaved ___ Bush ___ Weave ___ Mohawk ___________
Any Tattoos? Yes _____ Where ________ No _____ Want any? Yes __ No __
Any Piercings? Yes ___ No ___ Want any? Yes ____ Where ____________
Any Brandings? Yes ___ No ___ Want any? Yes ____ Where ____________
Do you like Giving Oral Sex ? No __ Yes __ Receiving Oral Sex? Yes – No ___
Do you Swallow? Yes __ No __ Sometimes __Are you a spitter? Yes ___ No ___ Sometimes __
Do you do Anal? Yes __ No __ Special Occassions __
Do you spank or like to be spanked? Yes ___ No ___ OPM (Other People’s Monkey)__
Do you spank your monkey or choke your chicken? Yes __ No __
Do you like to shower before sex? Yes ___ No (It removes the flavors) ___
Do you like to be tied up? Blind folded? ____ Bitten? ____ Toys? ____
Do you like the lights on or off? On __ Off ___
Do you like clothes on ____ Partially on ____ Butt Naked ____
Do you like to involve food in your sessions? Yes ___ No ___
Do you have any sexual photos or video of yourself? No __ Yes __ Want to make some ___
Which do you prefer? One on one__ Doubles__ Triples __ More than 3 People __ Group___
While having sex, what do you do? Faint__ Cry__ Moan__ Wiggle__ Twist__ Jerk about__ Jerk Off
__ Pant__ Sweat___ Scream__ Squirt ___ Hum__ Whistle__ Just lie there__
How do you like your sexual action? Oral ___ Anal ___ Intercourse ___ Oral only ___ Intercourse
Only ___ All of the Above ___ All the above minus Anal ___
When you are about to cum do you? : Kick and bite.__ Scratch and Scream.__ Kiss and Lick.__ Push
back with increasing determination__ Fart __
When you are having sex do you? Scream.__ Moan __ .Fart __ Bite and scratch ___
How do you prefer your partner? Small.__ Medium.__ Large __ Skinny.__ Wet.__ Thick __ Tight
Long __ Stubby __ Pencil Dick ___
Availability, Frequency, Duration, and Tendencies Section
How often do you want to have sex ? Daily__ Weekly__ Monthly__ As much as possible__
How long can you last? 1min ___ 15min__ 30min__ 1hr__ all night___
Do you prefer Evenings _____ Mornings ____ Nooners (Lunch time) _____
When are you available? 8-12am__ 1-5pm__ 6-10 pm __ all night __ Midnight – 8 am __
Do you like to have sex: Outdoors _____ Indoors ____ In the Shower ___ In a Car _____
Do you talk during sex? Yes __ No __ Can’t talk because your mouth is full __ Can Talk
(Ventriloquist) ____
Do you like to talk dirty? Yes __ No__ Sometimes__ Always__
Skills and Talent Inventory Assessment Section
Do you like to role play? Yes __ No __
Do you like the movie “Deliverance”? Yes __ No ____
Can you squeal like a pig? Yes __ No __
What’s your favorite body parts in order? ( 1 being best 5 being last)
Butt __ breast ___ Chest ___ Mouth ___ Penis ___ Vagina ___ Ears ___ Eyes __
What’s your favorite hole? 1. _____________ 2. ____________ 3. ______________
Have you ever had sex with an animal live or other wise? Yes __ No __
Do you like to kiss? Yes __ No ___ (If no stop here)
Are you tight or loose? Tight ___ Loose ___ Uptight ___ Other ___________
Did it ever go in the wrong hole? No ___ Yes ____ Explain __________________________
Any weird sexual fetishes? ATM ___ Fisting ___ Golden Showers ___ Brown Showers ___ Baby
Diapers __ Other 1_____________ Other 2 _________________ Other 3 _________________
Do you like inter-racial sex? No __ Yes ___ Preference 1 ___ ___ Preference 2 ____________
Do you like sex with clowns? No _____ Yes _____ Never tried but would like to ____
Do you like sex with midgets? No _____ Yes _____ Never tried but would like to ____
Do you like sex with amputees? No _____ Yes _____ Never tried but would like to ____
Do you like sex with handicapped? No _____ Yes _____ Never tried but would like to ____
Are you handicapped? No__ Yes __ Explain ________________________________________
Do you have big hands and feet? No __ Yes __ If yes explain __________________________
Can you hold a “Q-Tip” in your coochie __ booty __ None __
Do you like sexy lingerie? Yes ___ No ___
What is your preferred pace? Slow__ Fast__ Very fast__ Rigorous___ Rough __
Fantasy, Imagination, and Innovation Section
Instructions for this Section, Fill in the Blank.
List your Four Favorite Positions:
1. ________________________________________
2. ________________________________________
3.________________________________________
4._________________________________________
Any special talent or skills None __ Yes __ If so, list: ________________________________
What could you do for me that no one else could?: _______________________________
Most interesting place you've done it: _________________________________________
Where would you like to do it but have not?(Body) _______________________________
What place would you like to do it but have not? _________________________________
What would you do to me if we were stuck alone together in an elevator for an hour by our
selves?: ___________________________________________________________________
What tickles your fancy? ______________________________________________________
When you are having sex what do you enjoy the best? ________________________________
What’s your specialty? ______________________________________________________
What’s your fantasy? ________________________________________________________
Are you a big freak or nymphomaniac? No __ Yes __ Explain _________________________
Would you like to try more things with your partner? No __Yes __
Do you feel like trying right now? ______________________________________________

Anything else you want me to know? __________________________________________
Are you willing to sign a waiver that frees your partner (me) from all liabilities for any damages or
injuries including but not limited to death, birth, diseases as a result of our sexual liaisons?
Yes __ No__
Sign and Date Here Name _______________ Date ___________
“Excerpted from “The Ultimate American Relationship Survival Guide” by Captain Timm “Yanz”
Yancy. (Operation Get-It-All Veteran)
For more relationship advice, help, humor, ideas, jokes, opinions, quipets, stories, tips, theories,
secrets, and more visit me at:
www.FaceBook.com/TimmYancy
Copyright 2010 All Rights Reserved Timothy J. Yancy

Getting To Know You Before We Have Sex Application

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Getting To Know You Before We Have Sex Application

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Copyright 2009-2010 Timothy J. “Yanz” Yancy. All Rights Reserved.

Unauthorized reproduction, distribution, or exhibition of this copyrighted material is strictly prohibited.

Getting to Know You before We have Sex Application (Long Form)

Purpose: To screen potential sexual partners.

General Information Section

Last Name: ___________________ First Name _____________ Nick Name _______________

Breast Cup Size ____ Waist ______ Hips ______

Endowment: Extra Small __ Small __ Medium __ Large __ Extra Large __ Enormous __

Phone: (____) ____________ e-Mail: ___________________________@ ________._____

Married ____ Single ___ Divorced ___ Separated ___Other____ In A Relationship_____

Do you use birth control? No __ Yes __ What Type ___________

Do you use condoms? Yes __ No __

Are you a premature ejaculator? Yes __ No __

Have you ever been stuck together? Yes ___ No ____

Do you sweat when having sex? Yes ___ No ___

Do you do Anal? Yes __ No __ Special Occassions __

Do you spank your monkey or choke your chicken? Yes __ No __

Do you like the lights on or off? On __ Off ___

Do you like clothes on ____ Partially on ____ Butt Naked ____

Do you like to involve food in your sessions? Yes ___ No ___

Availability, Frequency, Duration, and Tendencies Section

Do you like to talk dirty? Yes __ No__ Sometimes__ Always__

Skills and Talent Inventory Assessment Section

Do you like to role play? Yes __ No __

Do you like the movie “Deliverance”? Yes __ No ____

Can you squeal like a pig? Yes __ No __

What’s your favorite hole? 1. _____________ 2. ____________ 3. ______________

Do you like to kiss? Yes __ No ___ (If no stop here)

Are you handicapped? No__ Yes __ Explain ________________________________________

Can you hold a “Q-Tip” in your coochie __ booty __ None __

Do you like sexy lingerie? Yes ___ No ___

Fantasy, Imagination, and Innovation Section

Instructions for this Section, Fill in the Blank.

List your Four Favorite Positions:

Any special talent or skills None __ Yes __ If so, list: ________________________________

What could you do for me that no one else could?: _______________________________

Most interesting place you've done it: _________________________________________

Where would you like to do it but have not?(Body) _______________________________

What place would you like to do it but have not? _________________________________

What tickles your fancy? ______________________________________________________

What’s your specialty? ______________________________________________________

What’s your fantasy? ________________________________________________________

Are you a big freak or nymphomaniac? No __ Yes __ Explain _________________________

Do you feel like trying right now? ______________________________________________

Anything else you want me to know? __________________________________________

Sign and Date Here Name _______________ Date ___________

Copyright 2010 All Rights Reserved Timothy J. Yancy

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Last Name: _____________ First Name _ Nick Name _________

Breast Cup Size Waist Hips ____

Endowment: Extra Small Small Medium Large Extra Large Enormous

Phone: () e-Mail: _______________@ ._

Married __ Single _ Divorced _ Separated _Other In A Relationship_

Do you use birth control? No Yes What Type ___________

Do you use condoms? Yes No

Are you a premature ejaculator? Yes No

Have you ever been stuck together? Yes _ No __

Do you sweat when having sex? Yes _ No _

Do you do Anal? Yes No Special Occassions __

Do you spank your monkey or choke your chicken? Yes No

Do you like the lights on or off? On Off _

Do you like clothes on Partially on Butt Naked

Do you like to involve food in your sessions? Yes _ No _

Do you like to talk dirty? Yes No Sometimes Always

Do you like to role play? Yes No

Do you like the movie “Deliverance”? Yes No __

Can you squeal like a pig? Yes No

What’s your favorite hole? 1. _ 2. 3. __

Do you like to kiss? Yes No _ (If no stop here)

Are you handicapped? No Yes Explain ________________________________________

Can you hold a “Q-Tip” in your coochie booty None __

Do you like sexy lingerie? Yes _ No _

Any special talent or skills None Yes If so, list: ________________________________

Are you a big freak or nymphomaniac? No Yes Explain _________________________

Sign and Date Here Name _____ Date _