Disclaimer: none of these characters are mine. They all belong to Stephanie Meyer.

I read New Moon and wondered what had happened to Edward(Again! None of this is mine! )

New Moon EPOV Never Ending Night

Bella
Mmm. What a pretty day. Esmes mind cooed. If Emmett asks me to arm wrestle again Ill just tell himno. Jasper thought sulkily. COME ON REF! JEEZE THAT WAS THE WORST CALL EVER! Emmett thought angrily at the TV. I purposely ignored Rosalies thoughts. I already knew they were self absorbed. Oh my, my, my What will my dear Bella want for her birthday? Alice wondered. I could take her shopping Alice paused for a moment seeing Bellas reaction. I laughed but, Alice didnt notice. No Shopping wouldnt be a good idea Hmm? I walked up the stairs and looked through her open door. She was pacing back and forth. For once she didnt invite me in. She was still too busy thinking about Bellamy Bella. Alice. I stated softly. What is it Edward? I am a little busy. Alice sighed sitting down on her bed. I think I recall Bella telling us to not get her presents. I said with a frown. There are so many things I would love to give to you Bella I would give you the whole worldbut you wont even allow a small present You cant honestly expect me to go along with that can you? Alice asked incredulously raising her eyebrows. Her eyes zoomed out for a split second. I dont see you going along with it. What are you getting her? Alice asked standing up and rocking up onto her toes. I dont know just yet. I admitted. Edward thats perfect! Alice trilled after a moment. She bounded forward and kissed me on both of my cheeks. She will love it! Alice laughed. I still had no idea what I have decided. Can I help you? Alices eyes were big and pleading. Her face turned into a pout. Only if you tell me what I am getting her. I allowed.

Her song Alice smiled. Its so cute. She is going to flip out. Alice sighed. I rolled my eyes. I could hear her truck already. I leaned against my favorite car. I heard her heart beating as well and I focused on that. I closed my eyes as Alice stood next to me. Her beautiful heartbeat came closer. I opened my eyes to see her face light up as her eyes met with mine. Bella. I sighed to myself. I watched her get out of her car. So beautiful I thought to myself. How in the world did I ever deserve her? She walked towards us quickly. Alice danced towards Bella. Happy birthday, Bella! Alice sang. Bella shushed her and glanced around the parking lot. Do you want to open your present now? Or later? No presents. Bella hissed under her breath. Alice frowned for half a second. Okay. Later, then. Alice smiled. Did you like the scrapbook your mom sent you? Alices voice sped up. And the camera from Charlie? I heard Bella sigh. Yeah Theyre great. Bella said with very little enthusiasm. I think that its a nice ides. Youre only a senior once. Might as well document the experience! Alice chuckled. How many times have you been a senior? Bella asked. I sighed. Thats different Alice said thinking the same thing I was. Bella was close enough to me now. I reached out towards her waiting for her. She took my hand immediately. Her skin was soft, warm, smooth and, flawlessand warm. Her dark brown eyes were lit. She smiled up at me widely. I heard her heart skip. I smiled at her. I lifted my free hand to touch her face gently always gently. So I breathed. As discussed, I am not allowed to wish you a happy birthday, is that correct? Yes, that is correct. Her beautiful voice replied. Just checking. I stated. You might have changed your mind. Most people seem to enjoy things like birthdays and gifts. I smiled. Alice laughed aloud.

Of course youll enjoy it. Alice said, willing her statement to become true with her mind. Everyone is supposed to be nice to you today and give you your way, Bella. Whats the worst that could happen? Alice said. You really shouldnt have asked her I began in my mind. Getting older Bella whispered. Not this Please dont fight about this anymore Please? I begged silently. I wasnt going to fight. I stopped listening until I was sure that they had stopped arguing. What time will you be at the house? Alice asked and I knew I was in the clearfor now. I didnt know I had plans to be there. Bella stated stubbornly. Oh, be fair, Bella! Alice said in a whinny voice. You arent going to ruin all our fun like that are you? A guilt trip is exactly what she needs. Alice thought with an internal laugh. I almost laughed along with her. I thought my birthday was about what I want. I fought back and found a way to get Bella to come over to our house I would have given her a choice but, if I would have let her stay home I knew Alice would have dragged her all the way to our house. I was not going to let her run away. I would rather take my Bella hostage than let Alice.

I opened the passenger side door to her old, run down truck. I really hated that truck. Its my birthday, dont I get to drive? Bella asked me in tigerkitten outrage. Im pretending its not your birthday, just as you wished. I fought back with a smirk. See her get out of that! Bella seemed to think for a small second. If its not my birthday; then I dont have to go to your house tonight Ugh! Leave it to Bella to get out of everything! I sighed to myself. All right. I closed the door and walked to the drivers side door. I opened it and smiled pleasantly at her. Happy birthday!

Shh! Bella snapped. She looked disappointed as she got in the truck. I walked at a human pace around to the passenger side. I got in and closed the door behind me. As she drove I messed around with her stereo. I wanted to give her a small hint at her present Your radio has horrible reception. I sighed. Want a nice stereo? She asked. Her voice was a combination of annoyance and worry. Drive your own car. She snapped. I frowned. What is making her sound so nervous? I hope she is feeling alright Or is it just the party? Alice probably has her worked up She parked in front of her house. I leaned towards her and held her face in my hands. Carefully. Always carefully. Her skin grew warmer under my touch. You should be in a good mood. Today of all days. I am happy! If it werent for this day I wouldnt have ever met you. Her breathing sped. And if I dont want to be in a good mood? She asked after taking a deep breath. I could taste her sweet scent on my tongue. I looked at her in a way that I knew would make her heart skip She didnt disappoint. Too bad. I said. I leaned closer to her and kissed her gently. Her warm lips were perfectsoft, warm Her breath sent a painful shock down my throat but, it was so lovely. Her hands flung around my neck. She threw herself into the kiss. Ah Bella Always tempting me I smiled and let go of her. I gently took her hands off from around my neck. Be good, please? I requested. I kissed her again. Her heart beat took off faster. I placed her hands down near her stomach. She lifted her hand to her humming heart. She smiled to herself. She lookssobeautiful Soperfect. Do you ever think Ill ever get any better at this? Bella asked. At what? You are perfect in everything you do That my heart might someday stop trying to jump out of my chest whenever you touch me? Bella asked. Bellamy dear. That is one of the best things you could ever do. I really hope not. Her heart jumpsfor me. Every time! Ahhh! What a wonderful feeling. She rolled her eyes. Lets go watch the Capulets and the Montagues hack each other up alright? She asked.

Your wish my command. Always. We walked together into her house. I lay down across her couch waiting for her. When she sat down I took advantage of it. I pulled her close to me. I covered her with a blanket not wanting her to freeze. Her warm body felt magnificent against mine. My mind started to think about how she could be closer. I had to get my mind to another topic. You know Ive never had much patience with Romeo. Whats wrong with Romeo? Bella asked in an offended tone. Well, first of all, hes in love with Rosalinedont you think it makes him seem a little fickle? And then, a few minutes after their wedding he kills Juliets cousin. Thats not very brilliant. Mistake after mistake. Could he have destroyed his own happiness any more thoroughly? I asked. I heard her sigh loudly. Do you want me to watch this alone? No, I smiled. Ill mostly be watching you anyway. I traced my fingers up and down her arm. Will you cry? I asked with true curiosity. Probably If I am paying attention. She whispered. I wont distract you then. I kissed her soft perfect hair. I could feel her blush heat the air and I could hear her heart beat faster. It wasnt too long before I began to whisper all of Romeos lines into Bellas ear. It was hilarious when I actually got her to cry. Ill admit I do sort of envy him here. I dried up her tears softly. Shes very pretty. Bella sighed. Ugh! AS IF ANYONE COULD EVER BE AS PRETTY AS YOU!!! I shouted in my mind. I dont envy him for the girl. You are the only one for me. Just the ease of suicide. You humans have it so easy! All you have to do is throw down one tiny vial of plant extracts I rolled my eyes. What? Bella asked in a distressed voice. Its something that I had to think about once, and I knew from Carlisles experience that it wouldnt be simple. Im not even sure how many ways Carlisle tried to kill himself in the beginning... after he realized what hed become. I said in a serious tone. I lightened it up immediately. And hes clearly in excellent health. She turned to look at me. Her eyes were livid and scared.

What are you talking about? What do you mean, that was something you had to think about once? Last spring, when you werenearly killed I remembered her ruined body sprawled across the floor. I remembered the evil glint inJames eyes. I remembered hearing her cry in agony. I remembered her calling for me. I remembered her blood I took a deep breath and tried to lighten my tone. Of course I was trying to focus on finding you alive, but part of my mind was making contingency plans. Like I said, its not as easy for me as it is for a human. Wish it was at the time Contingency plans? Her voice seemed broken and hurt. Well, I wasnt going to live without you! I rolled my eyes. Who could I ever live without you Bella? You are my everything. But I wasnt sure how to do it I knew Emmett and Jasper would never help I was thinking maybe I would go to Italy and do something to provoke the Volturi. Defiantly something that would work. What is a Volturi? Bella asked. She was furiousit wasnt her normal tiger-kitten angershe was truly outraged. The Volturi are a family; a very old, very powerful family of our kind. I answered her. They are the closest think our world has to a royal family; I suppose. Carlisle lived with them briefly in his early years, in Italy, before he settled in Americado you remember the story? I asked. I was trying to get her to not look so angry. Of course I remember. Anyway You dont irritate the Volturinot unless you want to die or whatever it is we do. I almost shrugged. Her eyes flashed with horror. I felt her soft, warm hands wrap around my face. You must never, never, never think of anything like that again! She nearly shouted at me. No matter what might ever happen to me, you are not allowed to hurt yourself! Her tone was sharp. Ill never put you in danger again, so its a moot point. I stated. I wasnt going to promise her anything. She is human andeventually humans.die. I almost winced. I will not live in a world where she doesnt exist.

Put me in danger!? She shrieked. I thought wed established that all of the bad luck was my fault? How dare you even think like that? She cried angrily. She doesnt understand. I sighed to myself. What would you do, if the situation were reversed? I asked trying to make her understand. Thats not the same thing Bella said softly. Why is it not the same? Is it because you are stubborn? I chuckled. What if something did happen to you? Bella asked me. Would you want me to go off myself? NO! I wanted to growl at her. She couldnt be hurt Never. Not even when I am gone No! I guess I see your pointa little. But what would I do without you? Whatever you were doing before I came along and complicated you existence. Bella smiled. All I would be doing is sitting around doing nothing and waiting until you showed up. I sighed. You make that sound so easy. It should Im not really that interesting. Bella stated. WRONG! I shouted to myself. I hope Bella doesnt mind I know she didnt ask for anything butits the least I can do She shouldnt have to cook or clean today. Bellas father thought. I sat up straight immediately. I set Bella next to me. Charlie? Bella asked. I smiled at her. Bellas warm hand engulfed mine. Charlie walked through the door a minute later. He had something that smell discussing in his handspizza. Gross. Hey, kids. Charlie grinned. I thought youd like a break from cooking and washing dishes for your birthday. Hungry? Charlie was a very nice man. I liked him a lot. He always took care of Bella. His thoughts were quieter than most peopleshe was hard to hear most of the time. He didnt like how close I was to his daughter at timesbut he was a father and I was glad someone was protecting her. Sure. Thanks, dad. Bella smiled. They walked into the dinning room. I followed Bella.

Do you want anything Edward? Nohe will politely say no and walk back into the living room like a gentlemen Hm? Charlie thought. No, thank you sir. I said in a polite voice. Not unless you have a mountain lion on the menu. I smiled and just to prove him wrong I sat with Bella.

Party

Do you mind if I borrow Bella for the evening? I asked after they had finished. I saw Bella put on a hopeful face. I smiled when I saw that Charlie had no objections. Thats finethe Mariners are playing the Sox tonight. She should be with her friends I like her spending time with Alice especially. I nearly laughed. Charlie adored my favorite sister. So I wont be needing any company tonightHere. He picked up a camera and tossed it to Bella. Mistake. After it bounced off of Bellas finger I moved a little faster than a human would and caught the camera. Nice save. He congratulated. If theyre doing something fun at the Cullenshopefully nothing too fun tonight, you should take some pictures. You know how your mother gets she will be wanting to see pictures faster than you could take them. Good idea, Charlie. I smiled handing the camera gently to Bella. Bella moved and snapped a picture of me. I nearly rolled my eyes. It works. Bella stated. Thats good. Hey, say hi to Alice for me. She hasnt been over in a while. I really do like that young lady Its been three days, dad. Her tone of voice made me feel like she was going to laugh. Ill tell her. Okay. You kids have fun tonight. He dismissed us. Who are you calling kid? Kid. I nearly burst with laughter. I grabbed Bellas hand and couldnt help but let a smug smile stretch across my face. I win. I opened her door for her and was surprised when she didnt fight me. I drove slowlybut not willingly. Bella mustve noticed. Take it easy. She warned. You know what you would love? A nice little Audi coupe Very quiet, lots of power She wouldnt ever allow me to buy it for her Theres nothing wrong with my truck. And speaking of expensive nonessentialsif you know whats good for you, you didnt spend any money on birthday presents. I almost laughed. Bella was threatening me She was far too kind for that. The words didnt fit with her precious voice.

Not a dime. I stated. Unless you count the pianobut, I already had that Good. Can you do me a favor? That depends on what it is. Bella, the last real birthday any of us had was Emmett in 1935 Cut us a little slackand dont be too difficult. Alice is going crazy. Theyre all very excited. Alice, Alice and, Alice just to name a few. Fine, Ill behave. I probably should warn you I smiled cruelly. Please do. When I say theyre all excited I do mean all of them. Everyone? I thought Emmett and Rosalie were in Africa? Bella asked in shock. Emmett wanted to be here. I told her. But Rosalie? I know. Bella. Dont worry, shell be on her best behavior. Or she will deal with me and Alice Soif I cant get you the Audiisnt there anything that youd like for your birthday? You know what I want She whispered. I frowned and my hands gripped the steering wheel tighter. I should have kept my mouth shut. Not tonight, Bella. Please? I pleaded. Maybe Alice will give me what I want Bella mused. I couldnt control it. I growled harshly. This isnt going to be your last birthday, Bella. I will not allow it I want to see youthe year after I ask you to marry me I want to see you a year after we are marriedand every year after it. I will not steal your soul I am not worth it I dont want to be any more selfish than I already am!

Thats not fair! My teeth clenched reflexively. I wanted to yell at her but, I knew I couldnt. I heard her moan as we pulled down my driveway. I took a few breaths. This is a party Try to be a good sport. Sure. I got out and raced to her side of the truck. I held my hand out to her. I have a question. Pleasedontstart this again If I develop this filmwill you show up in the picture? She asked in a curious, sweet, honest voice. I laughed. I pulled her out of the car and walked her to the house. I opened the door quickly. Happy birthday, Bella! I heard all of my family saysome more enthusiastically than others. I felt Bellas blush heat the air. I wrapped my arm around her and kissed the top of her head. Esme kissed Bella on the forehead. Carlisle flung his arm around Bellas shoulders. Sorry about this, Bella We couldnt rein Alice in. Carlisle whispered. I know she hates attention Hmph! Alice thought in distaste. She is still so littleand red Ha! Gotta love my little sister. Emmett thought to himself. Aww Esme thought. Ill just keep my distance Jasper thought. Ill keep my mouth shut, Edward Dont worry. Rosalie sighed. You havent changed at all Emmett frowned. I expected that there would be a perceptible different, bit here you are, red-faced like always. Emmett laughed. He had always like Bella I had always appreciated it. Thank a lot, Emmett. Bella blushed a darker shade. Emmett laughed. Shes a keeper I have to step out for a second He winked at Alice. Dont do anything funny while Im gone No tripping, no face-plants, no knocking stuff over, no blushing Emmett teased. Ill try. Bella sighed. Alice skipped forward.

Time to open presents. Alice said. You better behave. She mentally told Bella. She grabbed Bella under her elbow and drug her towards the presents. Alice I know I told you I didnt want anything But! I didnt listen. Alice said smiling. So ha! Alice added silently. Honestly, how does Edward deal with her? Sometimes the way she thinks is absurd. Tell me about it. I thought. Alice took Bellas camera and gave her a silver box. Open it Alice smiled. Or so help me I will make you Bella opened it slowly. UmThanks? I saw Rosalie smile. Shes totally clueless! Ha ha! Rose teased. Jasper laughed. Its a stereo for your truck, Emmetts installing it right now so that you cant return it. I really do like this girl Too bad I cant seem to control myself Thanks, Jasper, Rosalie. Bella smiled. Thanks Emmett! Bella called. As if I couldnt hear her! HA! Emmett laughed loudly and Bella joined in. I loved her light, carefree laugh. It was so beautiful. Open mine and Edwards next. Alice insisted. She will just love it! Alice gushed. I cant wait! Bella turned and glared at me. I had to admitshe was cute when she was mad You promised. Bella frowned. Emmett ran through the door. Yes! Just in time! Emmett smiled. I didnt spend a dime. I promised. I moved a wayward strand of her hair and heard her heart race. So cute! Esme thought. Aww! Alice agreed. Perfect for each other Carlisle sighed.

Thats the strongest bond between people I have ever sensed Jasper admitted. Ughgooey stuff. Rosalie half-complained. DarnThought she would blush. Emmett said in mock disdain. Give it to me. Bella ordered. Emmett chuckled. She rolled her eyes at me and I smiled. She started to open the package when she muttered. Shoot. Everything slowed to a crawl. I first smelt her fresh beautiful blood. I saw a small drop ooze from her small cut Then I heard the voices. Uh-oh. Carlisle. How come I didnt see? Alice. Oh dear. Esme. Way to go. Emmett. Ugh Rose. MMMM! Jasper. No! No! No! A second whiff caught his attention. Mine! No! I shouted. I dashed to stand in front of Bella. I pushed her away from Jasper. Jasper pounced at me. OUT OF MY WAY, EDWARD! IT WILL BE EXTREAMLY QUICK! Jasper thought. Jasper snarled at me trying to force his way through me. I held him barely. His teeth snapped close to me but, I didnt care. Bellas blood was becoming much more potentmaking me feel out of control. I stopped breathing. Emmett came to my rescue. He grabbed Jasper tightly. Jasper still snarled and fought staring at Bella. I heard a small voice of reason. Emmett, Rose, get Jasper outside. Come on Jasper. Emmett ordered. I crouched over Bella. I let out a low growl to my brother who still struggled in Emmetts arms. Mine Mine I want Jaspers mind continued. Rose stood in front of Jasper and led them out the door. Ohsuch a lovely scent I shouldnt stay here I dont want to lose it. Esme thought. I am so sorry, Bella. Esme whispered.

Let me by, Edward. Carlisle said in a calm voice. I stared at him. His mind was calmcontrolled. I nodded and relaxed. Here, Carlisle. Alice said softly. The blood I was dazed It was a moment before I heard a voice. Lets take her to the kitchen table. Carlisle stated. She will be fine Edward Trust me. I picked Bella up gently. How are you doing Bella? Im fine. I heard Bella say. I sat her in a chair and stood over hernot daring to breathe. Just go, Edward. Bella sighed. I can handle it. I whispered. As I said that my body filled with a longing for her blood. She noticed. You dont need to be a hero Carlisle can fix me up without your help. Get some fresh air. Bella ordered. Bella winced. Ill stay. I insisted. Why are you so masochistic? Bella asked in a sad tone. I was about to say something but, Carlisle spoke. Edward you may as well go find Jasper before he gets too far. Im sure hes very upset with himself, and I doubt he will listen to anyone but you right now. Carlisle said. I will take care of Bella. Yes, go find Jasper. Bella agreed instantly. You might as well do something useful. Alice sighed. Ill be with you in a moment Trust me. Wait for me? I narrowed my eyes. I frowned but sprinted out of the back door. I could smell Jaspers scent in the air. Immediately I ran after him. What have I done? I wondered. That could have killed Bella. I have put her in danger She shouldnt ever be in danger I am putting her in harms way I cant do that Its not right She should be safe Happy I havent enough worth to claim her. I am nothing. She shines brilliantly like the sun I am nothing The only shine I have is the one she gives me I should leave. Pain abruptly ripped through my torso. I staggered and fell to the ground. I gasped for air even though I didnt need to. You didnt need to lay on the ground. Alice thought sarcastically. I got up and ran with her. We caught up to Jasper in record time.

Fight

I am so sorry! Jasper shouted.

Its alright. I saidmy voice was flat. I tried to lighten it. Everyone is alright. I still Jasper started. I hadno rightnoexcuse Jasper was struggling to keep his composure. Anyone could have made that mistake I almost did. I admitted. I dont care I wish I wish I could handlethe urgethe Jasper couldnt talk coherently. He looks like he is about to lose it. I am not mad If I am mad at anyone I am mad at myself. I sighed. Jasper frowned and looked down at the ground in shame. Hey, I stated softly walking up to him. What? Jasper asked stiffly. No brother of mine looks down in shameunless I tell them to. I said. I pulled his chin up and gave him a small hug. You really arent mad? Jasper asked in a soft voice. Not at all. I told him truthfully. I wasnt mad at him. Thank God. He breathed. I looked him full in the eye. I cant be mad at my brothers I smiled. I can be irritated to death by thembut never am I able to be mad. Alice cleared her throat. Excuse me Alice said in an intense voice. Edward I need to talk to you. Alice I started. Jasper is fine. I need to talk to you now. Alice hissed. I was taken aback by her tone. I shot Jasper a weary glance and he shrugged. I slipped into Alices mind but all I could hear were the names of every general in the civil war. Alice grabbed me and pulled me onto a small path in the forest. She took off dragging me with her. She stopped a long ways away from where Jasper stood.

Edward? Alice asked. What? I asked softly.

I see something Its bothering me. Alice frowned. I dont know what you are talking about. I said though I had an idea. Edward? What Alice? I asked in a very rude tone. You need to stop thinking that way. Alice stated. I knew what she was thinking. Alice its the only way I sighed. If Bella couldnt be safe in my world with me I was not going to endanger her any longer. She deserved so much more. Can you even think about leaving? Alice asked in a high voice. I will do whats necessary. I hissed. It will kill you. Alice said knowingly. It will save her. I said in a calm tone. EDWARD! Alice shouted. You are a darn stubborn fool! Cant you see? Alice closed her eyes and focused on the slightly solid future. I could see myself I looked terrible but, I didnt care. Thats my problem. I stated. Edward. Alice whined. It will kill Bella too. I will not let you hurt her! She will heal. I insisted. Humans always heal. Bella isnt like a human! She will never heal! Do you remember how scared she was when she thought you were going to leave her? If you leave her nowyou will kill her. Alice said. It wont kill her. It will darn well rip her soul, mind and heart apart She will be unfixable! Alice insured me. She will be better off with you here. I am not that important. You are to her! Edwardleaving herwould cause nothing but pure agonyfor everyone. I love her, Esme adores her, Carlisle thinks of her as a daughter, Emmett thinks of her as a sister, Jasper even cares a lot about her,

Rosalienever mind what she thinks. You love Bella with all of your heart. Everyone loves you We dont want you to disappear. Alice I complained. You want to know something? Alice asked. I think you are just being a selfish fool. Selfish!?!?! I snarled at her. How was I being selfish? I was dying inside. It was impossible for me to think about leaving my beautiful Bella. Yes. Alice stated calmly. You are letting go of Bella just to rid yourself of insecurities. Everyone loves her Edward! You are hurting everyone. You are killing her and you are torturing yourself. I. Am. Not. Killing. Her. I hissed through gritted teeth. I. Am. Trying. To. Protect. Her. I glared at my favorite sister with complete distaste. She took five steps towards me and placed her hands on my temples. Her eyes focused on something. I couldnt help but look. Bella. My Bella was lying on the ground in the middle of a forest. She was shivering and wincing. She looked worse than I had ever seen her before. Alices vision abruptly went blank. Edward Alice whined. Every time I have tried to continue that vision It always disappears Like there is nothing more to see. Like she is gone Please Alice begged. She grabbed my hands. If her eyes could be filled with tears I knew they would be. Alice Humans heal. She will heal. She is brave She doesnt need me to survive. I said in a hushed tone. Please? Alice begged again. I am going to leave. I will not endanger her any longer. I am staying. Alice said in a defiant voice. No, you are not. I hissed at her. I am her best friend! I am not going to leave her side when she is hurt! Alice shouted. I had never seen the little pixie so mad before in my existence. You and the family are leaving. I said in an extremely cold voice. I will stay behind tosay goodbye I stated softly. You will tell her nothing. You will leave tonight with Jasper. You wont fight me on this It is my

decision. I ordered in a cruel voice. I hated to speak that wayespecially to Alice but, I had no choice. Alices tawny eyes closed. She opened them again with complete pain in her features. You go ahead and enjoy your never ending torment! She snapped. Your never ending night She paused. Dont go looking for her future either. We have done enough damage. I said. I want her to have a clean break I dont want her to have to ever suffer again. You are putting a world of suffering on both of your shoulders. Alice frowned. You have to promise. Edward? Alice pleaded once more. I growled at her. I promise. Alice said in defeat. We ran back to Jasper. Alice told Jasper to stay and wait for her. We ran back to the house. I heard Carlisle speaking. I suppose I should take you home now. Carlisle sighed softly. I walked into the room. Ill do that. I keep all of my emotions to myself. I masked them completely. Bellas eyes seemed to x-ray me. I was sure she would see right through me. Carlisle can take me. Bella stated. She looked at the blood on her shirt. Im fine. Youll need to change anyway Youd hive Charlie a heart attack the way you look. Ill have Alice get you something. I walked out of the kitchen but I still listened. Hes very upset. I heard Bella whisper. Yes. Carlisle stated. Tonight is exactly the kind of thing that he fears the most. You being put in danger, because of what we are. Carlisle You see right through me. Its not his fault. Bella said. My heart swelled. Its not yours, either. Carlisle ended the conversation.

Alice. I whispered. I placed my lips at her ear. If you say one thing I will not be a pleasant person to deal with. Tell Carlisle and Esmeabout everything. I will tell them what I canso try to use up some time Fine. Alice sighed. Ill be listening Come. I ordered. Alice walked up to Bella. Cmon. Ill get you something less macabre to wear. I couldnt believe how normal her voice was. I listened to everything they said while I talked to my parents. Carlisle We have to leave. I stated. Why? Esme asked in shock. I am not surprised Carlisle said. It is your call I think that you may be wrongbut, I too have been wrong many times I will do whatever needs done. Son. Thank you Carlisle. Alice will talk to you. I said as soon as I heard Alice and Bellas conversation end. I opened the front door and waited. Take your things! Alice shouted. You can thank me laterwhen youve opened them. But since Mr. Grumpy is being a big, mean, dumb oaf at the moment I dont think you will thank me Goodnight, Bella. Carlisle and Esme sighed. I walked out to the car and opened the door for Bella. I could hear Alice speaking with my parents. I ran to the other door and got in the truck. It was too quiet All I could think about was leaving Bella How could I ever convince her that I dont love her? That I dont need her? That I dont want her? Say something. Bella begged after what seemed like forever. What do you want me to say? I asked. Tell me you forgive me. Anger flashed through me instantly. Forgive you? For what? If Id been more careful, nothing would have happened. Bella frowned. Bella, you gave yourself a paper cutthat hardly deserves the death penalty.

Its still my fault. Bella said in a weak voice. Your fault? I snarled. If youd cut yourself at Mike Newtons house, with Jessica there and Angela and your other normal friends, the worst that could possibly have happened would be what? Maybe they couldnt find a bandage? If youd tripped and knocked over a pile of glass plates on your ownwithout someone throwing you into theneven then. Whats the worst? Youd get blood on the seats when they drove you to the emergency room? Mike Newton could have held your hand while they stitched you up he wouldnt be fighting the urge to kill you the whole time he was there. Dont try to take any of this on yourself, Bella. It will only make me more disgusted with myself. How the hell did Mike Newton end up in this conversation? Bella demanded in a rude voice. Mike Newton ended up in this conversation because Mike Newton would be a hell of a lot healthier for you to be with. I barked at her. Id. Rather. Die. Than be with Mike Newton. She stated fiercely. Id rather die than be with anyone. But. You. My heart ripped. Dont be melodramatic, please. I tried to find a calm tone but there was none. Well then, dont you be ridiculous. She retorted. I moment later I shut off her car in fron of her house. Will you stay tonight? Bella asked in a small voice. I should go home. I stated. For my birthday? Bella pleaded gently. How does her voice make me feel so weak!?!?! You cant have it both wayseither you want people to ignore your birthday or you dont. One or the other. My tone was different Less stressful. Okay Ive decided that I dont want you to ignore my birthday. Ill see you upstairs. I saw her grab her presents. You dont have to take those. I frowned. I want them. She sighed. No, you dont. Carlisle and Esme spent money on you. I warned her.

Ill live. I flashed around the car thinking about her hurt arm. Let me carry them, at least. Ill be in your room. She smiled. Thanks. Happy birthday. I stated. I bent down to press my lips to hers. Immediately all of my troubles washed away. She leaned into the kiss. I smiled at her in a way I knew she loved and dashed up through her window. I sat on her bed worrying. How would I ever learn to let her go...? She is my everything. She walked into the room a while later. Hi. I said. My voice was offand she noticed. She pushed the presents away from me and climbed into my lap. Hi. She leaned into my chest. Can I open my presents now? Where did the enthusiasm come from? I asked forcing my tone to be normal. You made me curious. Allow me. I said unwrapping Carlisle and Esmes present. I handed it to her. She mumbled sarcastic but I ignored her. Were going to Jacksonville? Bella asked in a light tone. No Thats the idea. I smiled. I cant believe it. Renee is going to flip! You dont mind though, do you? Its sunny, youll have to stay inside all day. She frowned. I think I can handle it. If Id had any idea that you could respond to a gift this appropriately I would have made you open it in front of Carlisle and Esme. I thought youd complain. Well, of course its too muchbut I get to take you with me! I laughed. Now I wish Id spent money on your present. I didnt realize that you were capable of being reasonable. I could do this If I could keep teasing her I unwrapped my present to her. What is it? She asked when she looked at the CD. I put the CD in her Cd player and let her listen. Her eyes widened. Her face was shocked. Tears were about to spill out of her eyes.

Does your arm hurt? No, its not my arm. Its beautiful, Edward. You couldnt have given me anything I would love more. I cant believe it. She listened intently. I didnt think you would let me get a piano so that I could play for you here I sighed. Your right. She smiled. How does your arm feel? I asked concernedly. just fine. She lied. Ill get you some Tylenol. I stated. She protested but I slid her off my lap and walked towards the door. Charlie! She whispered intensely. He wont catch me. I chuckled. I was back a split second later and gave Bella the medicine and a glass water. Its late. I commented after she took the pills. I picked her up and covered her in the blanket. I lay down next to her and wrapped an arm around her. Her head leaned on my shoulder. Thanks again. She sighed. Youre welcome. Anything for you. What are you thinking about? She asked after a moment. What to do I was thinking about right and wrong actually. I said honestly. Remember how I decided that I wanted you to not ignore my birthday? She asked. She was trying to distract me It was working. Yes. Well, I was thinking, since its still my birthday, that Id like you to kiss me again. She stated. Youre greedy tonight. I commented. Yes, I ambut please. Dont do anything you dont want to do. She smiled.

I would love to kiss you I would hate to leave you I would hate for you to hurt. God? Why is everything so difficult? Heaven forbid that I should do anything I dont want to do. I put my hand gently under her chin and pulled her face up to meet mine. I kissed her gently. Her heart thudded against me like butterfly wings. This could be the last time Against my better judgment I deepened the kiss. I twisted my hands into her hair and pulled her warm body to me. I felt her hands weave their way through my hair. She pressed her body to me. I was slowly beginning to lose control. I pushed her away gently. She was gasping for air. Sorrythat was out of line. I stated also out of breath. I dont mind. She sighed. I frowned. She will be the death of me. Try to sleep, Bella. No, I want you to kiss me again. She said in an alluring voice. Youre overestimating my self-control. I said honestly. Which is more tempting you more, my blood or my body? She asked with a smile. I looked at her a smiled. Wish I could have you closer Its a tie Now, why dont you stop pushing your luck and go to sleep? I asked. Fine. She sighed. She pressed herself against me. I noticed her place her hurt arm against my cold skin. She fell asleep quickly leaving me alone with my thoughts. All I could think about was the upcoming doom. It was the first, of what I was sure would become a very large number of long nights. Taptap Two soft sounds against the window. Edward? Carlisle asked silently. I saw his face in the window. He saw me with Bella resting on my shoulder. May I come in? He asked in a polite tone. I nodded. He slid the window open and closed. You look terrible. He commented as he walked to the edge of the bed. I closed my eyes and nodded. Are you sure this is the right thing to do? He asked. The right thingfor Bella. I whispered softly. What about for my son? Carlisle asked in a concerned tone. Ill get over it. I sighed. No you wont. Carlisle stated knowingly.

Ill deal with it Will Bella be alright? Humans heal quickly. I told him. Bella She doesnt react like humans Instead of running away from monsters she runs towards them. He pointed out. She will be hurt I guarantee it. Carlisle warned. Over timeshe will heal. I insisted. It seems to melike I am fighting the inevitable Alice and Jasper are on their way to Denali. Em and Rose are on a flight to Africa Esme and myselfare going with Aliceuntil we decide where we are going Son, where are you going? You can come with us I amgoing huntingI told him. Victoria? He asked. I nodded. He walked forward and touched my shoulder. Be careful I nodded. He looked at Bella. He touched her cheek gently. I will miss my daughter No matter what She will always be my daughter. My mind melted. I should go Carlisle sighed. Goodbye son Pleasedontbe a stranger Call us Dont let us worry for too long Especially Esme. I nodded. He sighed and jumped out of the windowleaving me alone again.

Leaving

The next two days were almost nonexistent. I could only think about leaving my Bella I slowly distanced myself away from her. It was a new definition of torture. We were walking out of the school to her car. Do you mind if I came over today? I asked politely. Of course not. Bella replied. Lord The pain that ripped through me was immense. Now? I asked opening her truck door. Sure. She said in an even voice. I was just going to drop a letter for Renee in the mailbox on the way. Ill meet you there. I took her letter in my hands. Ill do it and, Ill still beat you there. I tried to smile but I could tell it was off. Okay She sighed. I walked to my car. I drove quickly to her house. I would deliver the letter later I went into her house. I took anything and everything that would remind her of me out of her room. I opened her scrap book and saw a picture. It was bent in half only revealing me. The other half was my precious Bella. I was about to take them with me when I realized

thatsomehow Bella should know that I still loved her I hid everything under her floor boards. I could hear her truck coming down the road. I bolted out the window and sat in my car. She parked in front of the house. She took a deep breath. She got out of her car and I got out of mine. I walked to her and took her bag. I put it back in her truck and I heard her heart thump uneasily. Come for a walk with me? I asked quietly. I took her hand. I wanted to stay there forever. I wanted to stare into her beautiful eyes and hold her warm hand in mineforever. Stupid. Hideous. Disgusting. Vampire! I shouted at myself. She didnt answer so I pulled her towards the forest. I led her onto a small path and then I stopped. I heard my engine start. Be careful, Edward. Carlisles voice said. He was the only one I trusted to stay here and not bother me or Bella. Ill deliver the letter. He thought. I heard him pull away silently. Bella didnt notice. I leaned against a tree. Shes so beautiful So perfect How can I leave? Okay Lets talk. She sounded brave but her heart still beat unevenly. I took a deep breath. Bella, were leaving. I said softly. She took a deep breath. Why now? Another year I cut her off. Bella, its time. How much longer could we stay in Forks after all? For Bella For Bella. For Bella. For Bella. For Bella. For Bella. For Bella. For Bella. For Bella. For Bella. For Bella. I told myself. Carlisle can barely pass for thirty and, hes claiming thirty-three now. Wed have to start over soon regardless. This statement was true and easy to say in a detached voice. She stared at me. Then her heart took off in double time. When you say we? Bella asked. I. Mean. My. Family. And. Myself. I told her. She shook her head back and forth. She took a few minutes to speak. Okay. Ill come with you. She said. Agony ripped through me. You cant, Bella. Where were going Its not the right place for you. I said softly. I wouldnt dare take her on a hunt for a vampirenever. This at least was easy to say It was true.

Where you are is the right place for me. She insisted. My heart swelled then it ripped itself apart. Im no good for you Bella. I said truthfully. I knew she would deny this. Dont be ridiculous! Youre the very best part of my life. She said in a soft pleading voice. My world is not for you. I told her. I could stand telling her the truth. I knew the blasphemy was coming closer and I didnt know how I could lie to her. What happened with Jasperthat was nothing, Edward! Nothing! Youre right, it was exactly what was to be expected. I whispered. You promised! She nearly shouted. Her voice ripped me apart. In Phoenix, you promised that you would stay I couldnt let her continue. As long as that was best for you. I said in a calm tone. No! She shouted at me. This is about my soul, isnt it? Of course it isbeautifullovelyperfectgirl. I would never dream of taking your soul away. I would never dream of taking your chances at heaven away. Carlisle told me about that, and I. Dont. Care. Edward I dont care! Dont you ever say that! I hissed in my head. You can have my soul I dont want it without youits yours already! I looked down I felt like I was being ripped and torn. It was like she was slowly pulling my heart out of my chest. I controlled my face completely letting nothing throughnot a single emotion. Bella, I dont want you to come with me. Oh yesI do. I want to stay I want to hold you every day. I want to be with you every second Youdont.want..me? She said slowly, softly. Her voice was confused, broken. I had the need to comfort her. I wanted to tell her I was a liar and I was sorry. I wanted to hold herI stopped myself. I said the most disgusting thing I could have ever said.

No. Oh Bella! Please! I love you. I want you. I need you to tell me that I am lying! PLEASE! She looked into my hard eyes. I stared into her soft endless brown eyes. Her eyes seemed to fight amongst different ideas but, then her eyes settled and became calm. Well, that changes things. Her voice was calm but I could hear pain behind it. I felt as though I had been ripped completely apart. In that sentence she ripped my heart completely away from me I felt empty. I looked to the forest. So many times have I told her I loved her! How could she let that one wordthe lie to break us? What was she thinking! I had to tell her once more. Of course I will always love you I had to fix that. In a way. But what happened the other night made me realize that its time for a change. Because Im I had to think for a moment. Tired of pretending to be something Im not, Bella. I am not human. Ive let things go on much too longand Im sorry for that. Her heart thudded. Dont Her broken voice begged. I nearly hugged her. Dont do this. She pleaded. I dont want to I have to I have to keep you safe I stated. I had to hurt her This would be the second biggest lie I would ever tell her. Youre not good for me, Bella. I told her. Oh God! She is everything! Everything I could ever wantever need I cant leave I cant! I screamed. You have to leave You have to leave for her! She stared at me with pure agony in her eyes. Ifthats what youwant. Ahh! My selfless little Bella!!! I nodded. I would like to ask one favor, though, if thats not too much. I saw her eyes flash with their old trusting, loyal and loving tone. It nearly broke me. I smoothed out my expression. Anything. She promised. AHHHH! I screamed to myself. I let my eyes melt. I stared at her. Her heart sped again. Dont do anything reckless or stupid. I ordered. My voice had intensity to it. I could hear myself layering it with care and love. I wanted her to know I wanted her to see that I still loved her completely. Do you understand what I am saying? I asked her. She nodded. I let my face harden again. I couldnt afford to let her see that side of me again. Im thinking of

Charlie, of course. No I am not! He needs you. Take care of yourselffor mefor him. She nodded. I will. I relaxed a bit. Maybe she would find peace soon And, Ill make you a promise in return. I promise that this will be the last time youll see me. I willed the words to be true. I wont come back. I wont put you through anything like this again. You can go on with your life without any more interference from me. It will be as if I never existed. But you will always exist to mealways Her heart took off faster than I had ever heard it before. She started to shake. I smiled, trying to reassure her. Dont worry. Youre humanyour memory is no more than a sieve. Time heals all wounds for your kind. And your memories. She asked She was worried about me. It choked me up. Well, I wont forget. But my kindwe are easily distracted. I tried to smile. Thats everythingI suppose. I am going to die! We wont bother you again. Surprise flew across her face. Alice isnt coming back? She half-asked. Her voice was almost inaudible. I shook my head. No, theyre all gone. I stayed behind to tell you; goodbye. I almost lost it at the last word. Alice is gone? Her voice was hurt. She wanted to say goodbye, but I convinced her that a clean break would be better for you. I paused. How in the effing world am I going to say this? I calmed everything in me. I thought about this as though I were coming back in the morning. Goodbye, Bella. I said in a quiet voice. I was about to walk away. Wait! Her broken voice cried. She reached out for me. She will be the death of me! I grabbed her wrists and lowered them to her sides. I leaned down slowly. I kissed her warm forehead. I had the urge to caress her cheek and kiss her lips and hold her in my arms. I stopped myself. Take care of yourself. At that moment I knew I had to go If I stayed for another moment I would have to call everything off. I took off sprinting away from her. I stopped a few miles away. I heard her heart beating in pained beats. I heard her feet stumbling against the ground. I couldnt help but

stand there. I was ripping myself up morebut I didnt care. It was starting to darken and I decided to run. I was sure I was out of hearing range when I stopped. I fell down in pure agony. I had never felt worse. I heard a soft resounding thud. I heard something soft beat. I knew it was her heart. It stopped for a moment then it picked up again. It was slow and deliberate. I ran not knowing how I was going to survive without her.

Time

October

November

December

January

February

March

April

Phone Call
I couldnt remember how long it had been since I had left Forks. All I knew is that it had been far too long. I missed Bella. I would walk through fire if it were the only way to get back to her. I would do anything to be near her again. Though I had tried to distract myself by tracking Victoriait wasnt working. All I could think about Everything in my mindwas about my angel. My Bella. My world. My life. My everything. Bella. I could tell I was doing no good at chasing Victoria I hadnt heard her mind in far too long. I was running quickly trying to avoid letting my mind stray to Bella. It hurt to even think her name It hurt to breath. Then she filled my mind with memories and almost instantly I fell apart. I fell to my knees. Every inch of me hurt. I felt as though I was being burned alive but, wasnt allowed to die. I curled up trying to pull myself back together butnothing helped. Why couldnt I have been human for her? I asked myself. Why could I have not been a monster? My insides burned.

Did she feel the same way I did? Is she hurting just like I am? Would she take me back if I ran to her home and begged her to let me into her life? Could she ever love me? The sun was beginning to fade. I knew already that I wouldnt be able to go anywhere until I could handle the pain that gripped me It was a long night

I stood there listening to nothingfeeling nothing. I felt as though my heart had been ripped away from me. My heart was gone My willingness to continue on in my starless night was gone. I was running quickly through the forest. I blinked and saw her. My Bella smiled at me. I very nearly fell over. I felt my insides rip apart and my mind burn with her memory. For Bella. Keep going For Bella. Keep her safe She is all that matters She needs to have her own, normal, human life. She doesnt need vampires to bother her. I said to myself over and over again. I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket. I am not coming home Carlisle! I cant bare it! I shouted to myself but, I stopped and looked at my phone anyway.

Rosalie
The phone told me. I am not in the mood to deal with you. I hissed and slid my phone back in my pocket. I started running again. As soon as the phone stopped vibrating it started again. I had slowed down to a walk as I entered Rio. Again it was Rosalie. I rolled my eyes and ignored her again. If I annoy her enough shell leave me alone. The phone vibrated again. This better be extremely important. I sighed. I didnt want to speak to anyone. The only person in the world I could stand to see was my Bella. What?! I snapped. Edward? Rosalie asked in a small voice. You called me didnt you? I growled at her. What do you want? II know that its not a good time Rose stated. Rosalie? I asked impatiently. I was so close to hanging up on her.

Aliceshe saw something Rose started. She saw Bella My whole body felt like it was being torn apart. Bella. Just hearing her name made my insides burn. I couldnt even hear what Rosalie had said. Did you hear me? Rose asked. No. I said in a broken voice. Edward Rosalie paused. Bella is dead. Bella jumped off a cliff She committed suicide. Rose whispered. No. I hissed. I fell to my knees in a small grassy park that I hadnt realized I had been in. Not my Bella! She cant be dead! I cant live without her I never could, I never would. My sweet, beautiful, kind, brave, little Belladead? No! Thats not true. I stated. If I could have cried I would have. If I could have screamed I would have. Pain gnawed at every inch of me. I burnt inside and out. Edward Alice saw it. She saw it Edward I am so Rose began. I hung up on her and immediately called that familiar number. Swan residence. A husky mans voice stated. I knew that it wasnt Mr. Swan. I hated the fact that it wasnt my Bellas voice. Hello, I said trying to keep my voice normal and unbroken. I mimicked my fathers voice to perfection. This is Dr. Carlisle Cullen. I was wondering if Charlie was home. I need to speak to him. I stated trying to stay calm. What will I do if she is gone? I asked myself but, I already knew the answer. I refuse to live without her. Hes not here. The man said. It could be just a coincidence I thought trying to keep myself calm. Might I ask where he is? I asked. Hes at the funeral. The man said with a sigh. I hung up the phone immediately. NO! I screamed to myself. I slowly walked out of the park dropping my phone in a garbage can. No doubt Alice will see this coming I sighed to myself. I didnt care. My love, my life, my soulif I had onehad just died. Alice I really hope you dont come after me. No matter what you do, or say I will not live without my life. Bella

I boarded a plane a short hour later. For the first time in far too longI allowed myself to think of Bella. Her pale, clear skin. Her deep chocolate eyes. Her long brown hair filled with tints of red. I wanted to go back to the time where life was easyperfect. The small moments I shared with her. I remembered the time I let her touch my skin Oh! How lovely and warm and soft her skin was. I sighed to myself. I remembered the first time I had held her in my arms and I had been in hers. I remembered all of those nights that I watched her sleep and dreamabout me. I couldnt deny myself these memories I had to relive themall of them. I remembered how soft her lips were against mine. I remembered the way her heart accelerated when I touched her. I remembered her blush. I remembered the way she caressed my name She had always made me feel like I was the best part of her beautiful, enchanting life. I remembered every time she had told me she loved me Then it hit me I killed her I killed my sweet, angelic, beautiful, loving, loyal, brave, lovely, perfect Bella. I hurt her and, she couldnt take it It was my fault I drove her to it. I was the one to put the final nail in her coffin. I had killed her while trying to save her. I killed the only thing that ever meant anything to me. I had never felt more eager than when I landed in Italy a while later. I walked through the terminal quickly trying to get out of that place as quickly as possible, without exposing myself. I didnt waste any time getting to Volterra. I walked up into the courtyard. I looked up and saw a tall clock tower. He looks like his whole life just came to an end. I heard someone think. Did I really look that awful? I wondered to myself. I walked until a saw him. He wore a cloak. He was very tall, almost the size of Emmett. Felix? I asked softly. The tall vampire turned to look at me with wide eyes. His eyes were a dark black color. They had specks of maroon in the center of them. Yes? Felix asked in return crossing his arms. I wish to speak with AroMarcus and Caius. I said softly. Something bad has happened to this one Hmmm. I wonder why he wishes to talk to them so badly

That is my business. I stated before I could control myself. Felix tilted his head to the side a smiled broadly. Quite a talent. He chuckled. He turned a led me to the one person I wanted to see.

Request
Aro. I stated with a small courteous nod. My name is Edward Cullen. You must know Carlisle then! Aro stated in a booming voice. Wonderful! How is my old friend? He is very well. Edward said in a monotone voice. Oh my lord What will this do to him? To Esme? I cant think about that The only thing that mattersthe only thing that has ever mattered is my Bella. Nowshe is gone. I winced. I take it that you are not here to talk though. Aro guessed. This Edward looks terrible. Such a mess inside and out. You have no idea Aro. I nearly growled. You can hear me? Aro asked silently. Yes. I agreed tired of waiting. Wonderful! Aro repeated cheerfully. What do you wish to ask?

I dont want to live anymore. I do not wish to deal with my pain. My voice was rising. Life isnt worth living anymore. No, life isnt worth living All rhyme and reason is gone There is nothing. Ahh Aro whispered. I cannot just give you what you asked for. I must know why you ask for it. Aro sighed. Might I see it through your eyes? Aro wondered. I held out my hand obediently. Aro took my hand and closed his eyes. My entire existence flashed through my mind. I could feel him searching for the thing that made me wish to die..or whatever it was that vampires do. He watched carefully and was glad to learn that Carlisle hadnt wasted away. His mind exploded when he saw Alices talents. I ground my teeth together and nearly growled at his possessive thoughts towards my favorite sister. He noticed my mood change and he flashed quickly forward. He came to my memories of Forks. MMM! Aro exclaimed as he passed through the day I had met Bella. What an intoxicating scent! She sings to you! It even makes me thirsty! He exclaimed. He continued on muttering things along the way. Such strength Self restraint How did this boy do that? Then he came close to the end of my memories. He heard and felt my pain as Rosalie told me there was nothing for me to live for. He let go of my hand. I have nothing left. I stated. I have nothing I admitted. I must speak with Marcus and Caius before I decide anything. Aro sighed. I would hate to upset Carlisle It seems that Edward feels the same way. I must let you know that You and your talent would be welcome here.. Aro offered. No, thank you. I hissed. Please consider it thoroughly. I nearly growled. I turned around and ran as quickly as I could to get back out into the streets. I sat in a hotel room at the edge of a bed. What if they dont decide to help me? I wondered to myself. What will I do? A hunt in this city would surly get their attention I could through a car through a building Its very sunny here

I kept thinking through everything. After a few hours I quit thinking about it. I started to think about her My Bella. I remembered her She was perfect. It caused me pain to try to remember but, I didnt care anymore Soon I would let go of that I wouldnt have to live in a world where my life didnt exist. Soft, gentle, smooth, beautiful, perfect, bravefoolishly brave, kind, pure I kept trying to come up with the right way to describe herbut nothing fit her perfection. Perfection itself would be jealous of my Bella. My muse BPOV Bella, Alice hissed. Whats wrong? I asked trying to wake myself up. Its not wrong! Its right. Theyre deliberating and theyve decided to tell him no. Alice smiled widely. I still wasnt completely awake. The Volturi? I asked softly. Of course, Bella. Keep up. She paused. I can see what they are going to say Tell me. I ordered. The attendant mustve heard me because he walked down the aisle to talk to us. Can I get you ladies a pillow? He asked in a whisper. Alice smiled brilliantly at him. No, thank you. The dazed attendant walked away. Tell me. I repeated almost silently. They are interested in him. They think his talent could be useful. They are going to offer him a place with them. What will he say? I asked quickly. I cant see that yetbut Ill bet its colorful. Alice grinned. EPOV

I walked into the crowded plaza. I quickly rushed to the entrance to the underground city. I was just waiting Waiting for someone to ask me to follow them. I hadnt waited more than an hour. The sun was beginning to fade away and the crowds had disappeared. Someone tapped me on my shoulder. Aro wants to speak to you. Demetri said softly. I followed him quickly. I didnt want to waste anymore time having to think about my sweet Bella being deadbecause of me. Edward. Aro said softly. Aro. I whispered even softer. I could see it in his mind and I sighed heavily. I am sorry, boy. I dont wish to destroy you. It would be very wasteful to rid the world of you. Aro stated. I have to decline your request but, I would like to offer you something in return What is that? I said my anger in my voice plain. I wish for you to join us. You gifts would be a wonderful attribute. Aro said. I am sure Carlisle would prefer you to join us rather than commit suicide. He was defiantly trying to guilt trip me. Aro. I said coldly. MY father knows me better than anyone else in this worldwith perhaps one exception... Bella. He knows how I amhow I think Carlisle is not a cruel person He would not want me to suffer as I already haveas I am. I stated knowing this to be true. If that is your decision. Aro sighed. It is. I said softly. Aro watched me as I turned away. Time for plan B. I thought wearily to myself. Edward. Aro called. I froze for a moment. Please dont tempt us. Truly I would hate to have to hurt you. I laughed for the first time since I had seen Bella. It was a cold, dark laugh. For someone who has seen every part of my mindyou sure saw nothing. I thought.

I had never felt my mind more hectic before in my life. So many things were flying through it at once. I looked into a mirror in the small room I was in. I did look terrible. My eyes were blacker than I had ever seen them before. I was thirstyvery thirsty. I got up. I knew the quickest way to get the Volturis attention. I walked out into the night and stood in a small ally way with my eyes closed. I smelt something heavenly and I opened my eyes. A small family was walking down the street. I almost went after thembut Edward? A disapproving voice said in my head. There are better ways to get your point across. It was Carlisles voice. Hes right Dont be something youre not The voice nearly killed me to hear it. Bella. You are not a killer. Youre not a monster. I fell apart. I shook my head and ran back to my room New plans ran through my head.