Implanted Without Consent

Before 2008, I never heard voices. Before 2008, I was not in severe physical pain. I would like it noted that before late summer of 2008, I had a completely stable work history. I graduated Hillsborough Community College in early 1991 with an AA (Fine Art), at which I had an art scholarship. I worked for Consolidated Printing (Hillsborough Rd., Tampa) for the end of 1992, Free Press Publishing (W. Cass St, Tampa) from 1993 until 1996, and then at C&D Printing (28th St., St. Petersburg) from 1996 until 1999. I worked at Professional Billing and Assoc. (4th St., St. Petersburg) from 1999 until 2001, and then at Medical Management Professionals (US Hwy 19 N, Clearwater) from 2001 until 2006. Then, while raising my toddler daughter, I worked at home as a project manager, for www.healingcrystals.com from 2006 until 2008, until I began to hear voices and have disturbing memories come back to me. Schizophrenia (usually found in ones childhood, teens, or 20s) never manifests in ones 40s, which makes me believe that what has been happening to me was artificially induced. The fact that its effects have been to severely disable me and slowly kill me off is why I have filed for disability. My disability makes it impossible for me to do nearly anything anymore. The severe pain, swelling, contractions in my pelvic region have had severely negative consequences for my physical and mental health because, not only is it physically disabling, it is disturbing because it feels like electroshock in my vagina. The voices, which come through two very provable implants located at each ear (see photos below), have had extremely negative consequences for my mental health. While I am nonviolent, and have no history of violence in any records, I live in a constant state of fear that I am going to be accused of a violent crime because of the voices threats, telling me that I am being framed for something. They tell me I am going to jail, that I am going to hell, and that I am being put to death. I now have severe anxiety attacks and I am afraid to go out in public. I have been afraid just to go to the clinic, or to email my lawyer or healthcare providers for fear that someone is monitoring me, and wants to keep me from getting help. I try not to leave the house unless I have to. It is a terrible way to live: constantly in fear for your life, health, freedom, safety, and indeed your soul. What is happening to me can only be described as torture. I am in constant, acute physical pain in my privates, which is also emotionally disturbing, since it feels like electroshocks in my pelvic region. When it first started happening, I was on the floor, screaming. I have been to 3 ERs (Largo Regional Med Center in 2008, Suncoast Hospital in 2009, and Orlando Regional Med Center in 2012-where I was having a panic attack), with no diagnosis for this pain, which started in Sept 2008. I believe I am suffering from PTSD, which is often associated with undiagnosed pain, because I have flashbacks of my mother and a doctor doing something to me with an instrument in my vagina. During this flashback, I feel the horrible pain of something unspeakable being done to me, while I am able to see my mother and the doctor. I can hear the sound of the instrument, and I am able to hear my own screams. The fact that I am unable to get any medical relief from this pain has made it hard for me to do things I used to take for granted: work a job, clean the house, and get any type of regular exercise.

While I have a history of depression, and I was neglected and verbally abused as a child, I had never heard voices in my life until 2008. However, I do have that history of depression, a failed suicide attempt at 17 (for which I was Baker Acted into Hillsborough Community Crisis Center-1985), and drug addiction. I do not harm people; I always took my anger out on myself. I believe my drug addiction was a way for me to keep memories of my traumatic abuse from surfacing, because it was when I was becoming drug-free that I started to have flashbacks. I was in treatment at PAR Highpoint in Clearwater from 2005 until 2008, when I lost my job and had to quit the program. When my methadone dose was very low (13mgs) in early 2008, I began to hear the voices and have memories come back to me, such as one of my mother doing something to me as a child. I am currently not taking any illegal drugs, but I find myself coming to a point at which I feel like I might someday want to commit suicide, just to end the physical pain and to stop the vicious attack of these voices. These voices have never told me to harm anyone but myself. They have said the following to me at various times: I just want you dead, Why dont you just die already, we dont need no aging mothers, youre just a loser, youre in our way, youre just a bastard anyway, etc. These voices will tell me to quit smoking and then harass me nonstop, making me want to have a cigarette just to try to soothe myself. While these voices have caused me to question my sanity, I feel sane enough to know that I am not any of those things that they say I am. Lately, theyve been telling me that theyre the gods, that I am a demon, and that I am going to jail, causing me to live in constant fear of being framed for something I havent done. I have never been violent, even when others have done violence against me; I have always turned the other cheek so to speak. For example, my best friend beat me up over a telephone bill she didnt want to share and I never hit her back. What is happening to me, physically and mentally, amounts to torture. My pain has spread into other areas of my body and I am now suffering from headaches and whooshing noises in my head, coming from these two points in front of each ear, which I cannot explain. I have kidney pain and burning sensations in my chest. I have tried every OTC medication for pain and none of it really works. Because I have no employment and thus no insurance, I am unable to get a CT scan or an MRI in order to receive a proper diagnosis. I consider myself lucky to get any medical attention at all. At least I have some help from the free clinic, and I am grateful for what they have been able to do, but they can only do so much. Everything that has been happening to me since 2008 has made me afraid to even go to a clinic. It took my exboyfriend to force me to go just this year. Often, I will beg him to go with me because I am afraid that someone is going to come and take me away. Despite our differences, I am grateful to him for his help. While I am legally homeless, I stay at his house sometimes to help take care of our daughter who is 7 years old. However, this is not an acceptable arrangement to him as he told me, and I dont know how much longer I can stay there. I never wanted to be on disability. I prefer to have a job and live a normal life. I liked being able to take care of myself, and now that this has happened to me, I feel just awful. I

find that I cannot bear my pain most of the time. Walking used to help, but since the voices have become so cruel and threatening, I am afraid to go outside anymore; for fear that I will be picked up and taken away, and tortured or killed. In the past year alone, my physical health has declined so much that I feel like I am just being murdered slowly anyway, and the voices have told me that they are doing just that. If I am granted SSD (disability), I am hoping that it will be temporary, until I can be diagnosed and healed at least to a point when I can go back to work and support myself. I never ever wanted to be a burden, living off of the government. I prefer to support myself and be a contributing member of society. I feel that SSD will allow me to receive adequate medical care, which may help me to well someday. These days, it seems that I am unable to get anyone to believe me regarding the pain from which I have been suffering, for the past four years. While I certainly can understand why people would have their doubts, having a previous drug history does not negate the fact that I am in absolute acute physical pain, in my privates. As I said, this pain occurs on a nearly constant basis, in my vagina and my uterus, with accompanied swelling and contractions, and I cannot seem to get anyone to help me, which is the main reason why I need disability. I have tried every anti-inflammatory and they will not work. While I cannot seem to get a diagnosis for this pain, a nurse told me that scar tissue isnt visible with a speculum. If it is scar tissue, it would explain my flashbacks of abuse in that area, which sadly involve my mother and a doctor. If they are flashbacks/PTSD, does that mean that I should be allowed to suffer in such pain that it causes a physical disability? I imagine that no one wants to admit that this sort of abuse can go on, but the resulting PTSD (which is known to include actual pain, memories, and auditory hallucinations) is disturbing, and the fact that no one in the medical community is willing to help me in any meaningful way, regarding either the pain or the PTSD, makes it downright scary.

This is where the voices have been coming from. I have been taking medication prescribed by a psychiatrist for voices for well over a month now, but it is not working, and in fact, seems to make it worse. No one wants to believe that I am having acute pain, nor will they give me an appropriate examination, including an MRI, X-Ray, or CT, to find out what these things in my head are. The fact that they are symmetrical, that I am hearing the voices through them, and that I actually get physical sensations from them should be

enough to at least get them examined, and/or removed. I have had one person try to tell me they were keloids, which is absurd as these two knots are under the skin and keloids appear on the skin, as you will see here:

The image above is a photo of three keloids. They are scars. While I do not want to insult your intelligence by pointing out the difference between these keloids and what I can only describe as implants, I have noticed that most people want to deny the disturbing truth of my situation, which would give anyone nightmares. As a rule, keloids occur on the surface of the skin, and people do not hear voices through them. When it first started, I began to have the memories of past abuse/neglect come back to me. Not long after that, I had some serious physical sensations in my heart. I had the sensation that my heart was exploding. In that moment, I heard a voice say, purge. I can only imagine that this person, whose voice was broadcasted into my head via the implants at my ears, wanted me to purge my memories, so I would not remember the terror of what had happened to me when I had that surgery under general anesthetic, with my mother present. If there is any attorney with the guts to take my case, I believe I have a good one. I have no doubt in my mind that these things in my ears are RFID chips, and that I have been made the unwitting and nonconsensual victim of a horrible Melenge-esque experiment. I also believe that they have been used in conjunction with post hypnotic suggestion to get me to do things I would have never had done if I did not have these implants. All it would take is either an MRI, or preferably removal of one, to prove what they are. I beg anyone reading this if you know anyone who might help me to please contact me, ASAP. The pain from which I suffer is traumatic enough to make anyone go mad. I have seen a psychologist who has said to me, I know you like to tell stories. How would she know that, when it was only our second visit? This is the woman who said my implants were keloids. When I have seen a medical doctor about my pain, he would not even let me communicate the symptoms I am experiencing. This is evidence of a medical bias against me, and indicates medical negligence. These people do not know me, but I have to wonder if someone has told them not to treat me.