When in

Doubt, Kiss
the Fish —
And Other
Extremely
Wise
Advice
by John Kremer
and Friends
People will accept your ideas much more
readily if you tell them Benjamin Franklin
said it first. — David H. Comins

When in doubt, quote Franklin. —

anonymous

Copyright © 2008 by John Kremer

All rights reserved.

Illustrations by Phil Frank

Copyright © 1993 by Creative Media
Services

Open Horizons
P. O. Box 2887
Taos NM 87571
575-751-3398
Fax: 575-751-3100

Web: http://www.quotablebooks.com
A
The beginning of wisdom is found in
doubting; by doubting we come to the
question, and by seeking we may come
upon the truth. — Pierre Abelard, priest

If you had any doubt about that, Lady

Elaine, you might have asked. After all, you
have words and that's what words are for,
aren't they? — Lady Betty Aberlin
When in doubt, kiss the fish. — Jonathan
Adolph

He who believes is strong; he who doubts is

weak. Strong convictions precede great
actions. — Louisa May Alcott, novelist

Laugh at yourself, but don't ever aim your

doubt at yourself. Be bold. When you
embark for strange places, don't leave any
of yourself safely on shore. Have the nerve
to go into unexplored territory. — Alan Alda,
actor

When in doubt, don't. — Lamar Alexander,

Lamar Alexander's Little Plaid Book

When in doubt, abstain. — Alexei

Alexandrovich, character in Anna Karenina
by Leo Tolstoy

When in doubt, close your eyes. Think of

England. — Amos, Israeli agent in The
Assignment movie
When in doubt, act like a gorilla. — Antoine,
director character in Early Edition TV show
When in doubt, make like Donald Trump. —
Jennifer Armstrong, Entertainment Weekly

If you doubt yourself, wear something else.

— AussieBum magazine advertisement
B
If a man will begin with certainties, he shall
end in doubts; but if he will be content to
begin with doubts he shall end in certainties.
— Francis Bacon, philosopher

Who never doubted, never half believed.

Where doubt is, there truth is—it is her
shadow. — Philip James Bailey, poet
When in doubt, you can always consult. —
Ryan Bakken, journalist

Weary the path that does not challenge.

Doubt is an incentive to truth and patient
inquiry leadeth the way. — Hosea Ballou,
preacher

In necessary things, unity; in doubtful

things, liberty; in all things, charity. —
Richard Baxter, Puritan
When in doubt, leave it at home. — Michael
Becraft

When you’re up to your nose in shit, keep

your mouth shut. — Jack Beauregard,
character in My Name Is Nobody movie

When in doubt, peel out. — Alex Blagg,

blogger, Blogg Blogg
If the Sun and Moon should ever doubt,
they’d immediately go out. — William Blake,
poet and artist
When in doubt, wear red. — Bill Blass,
fashion designer

Guidelines for bureaucrats: 1) When in

charge, ponder. 2) When in trouble,
delegate. 3) When in doubt, mumble. —
James H. Boren

Doubt whom you will, but never yourself. —

Christine Bovee

When in doubt, laugh at yourself. — Sonia

Braga, actress
I have a rule that has served me well in life.
When in doubt, do nothing. If you're not
sure, don't buy it, don't comment, don't
commit. Sit tight. — Tempe Brennan,
forensic anthropologist in Kathy Reich's Deja
Dead

Remember, when in doubt, you should never

do what you truly want to do. — Nathan
Bronfman, character in Human Nature movie

When in doubt, cut to the skyline. — Jamie

Buchman, character in Mad About You TV
show (reading a fortune cookie)
There is nothing more dreadful than the
habit of doubt. Doubt separates people. It is
a poison that disintegrates friendships and
breaks up pleasant relations. It is a thorn
that irritates and hurts; it is a sword that
kills. — Buddha, founder of Buddhism

Never despair, but if you do, work on in

despair. — Edmund Burke, British statesman

When in doubt, DO something. If it turns out

to be wrong, correct it. But you will never
know until you do it. — Ivan Burnell, author
C
When in doubt, end with a quote. — Michael
Cader, book producer

When all else fails, read the instructions. —

Cahn's Axiom
If you are ever in doubt as to whether to kiss
a pretty girl, always give her the benefit of
the doubt. — Thomas Carlyle, philosopher

When in doubt, just cook it. — Mary

Carmichael

Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action

breeds confidence and courage. If you want
to conquer fear, do not sit home and think
about it. Go out and get busy. — Dale
Carnegie, motivational author
When in doubt, my dears, take an extreme
case. — Lewis Carroll, author

Remember, when in doubt, throw it to

Carter! — Chris Carter, football receiver

When in doubt, eat. — Lisa Cates, character

in August Fires movie

When in doubt, have somebody enter the

room with a gun. — Raymond Chandler,
detective novelist
When in doubt, have two guys come through
the door with guns. — Raymond Chandler,
detective novelist

When in doubt, suggest that a

subcommittee be appointed. — Harry
Chapman

Whenever you have doubts about

something, communicate! Talk, talk, talk
until the problem resolves. When you feel
stress, disagreement or resistance between
you and someone near you, the wrong thing
to do is ignore the problem. Instead, start
communicating. — Mike Chatelain, author,
TipsForSuccess.org
If you listen, one day you might be heard.
And when in doubt, use the smell test. —
Maurice Chavez, character in Grand Theft
Auto: Vice City video game

The men who really believe in themselves

are all in lunatic asylums. — Gilbert Keith
Chesterton, novelist, Orthodoxy
Great doubts, deep wisdom. Small doubts,
little wisdom. — Chinese proverb

When in doubt, buy your man a cordless

drill. It does not matter if he already has
one. I have a friend who owns 17 and he has
yet to complain. As a man, you can never
have too many cordless drills. No one knows
why. — Christmas Gift Ideas for Men

Nearly all societies have the instinct is to

lock up anybody who is truly free. First,
society begins by trying to beat you up. If
this fails, they try to poison you. If this fails
too, they finish by loading honors on your
head. — Winston Churchill, British prime
minister

By doubting we come to truth. — Cicero,

philosopher and orator

He who believes is strong; he who doubts is

weak. Strong convictions precede great
actions. — J. F. Clarke

When in doubt, lie your head off. — Brian

Cloughley, journalist, CounterPunch
If all else fails, issue an ultimatum. —
married husband with child, Cold Feet TV
show

When in doubt, just say, “But how do you

feel about that?” — Tess Coleman, character
in Freaky Friday movie

Doubt is the vestibule which all must pass

before they can enter the temple of wisdom.
When we are in doubt and puzzle out the
truth by our own exertions, we have gained
something that will stay by us and will serve
us again. But if to avoid the trouble of the
search we avail ourselves of the superior
information of a friend, such knowledge will
not remain with us; we have not bought, but
borrowed it. — Charles Caleb Colton, author

When you have nothing to say, say nothing.

— Charles Caleb Colton, author

When in doubt, delete it. — Philip Cosby

When in doubt, check him out. — Joseph

Culligan, book title

When in doubt, sling effort at it. — George

W. Cummings, Sr.
When in doubt, mull. — Mario Cuomo,
governor
D

Just think of the tragedy of teaching children

not to doubt. — Clarence Darrow, attorney

When in doubt, make no change at all. —

Phil Davis, president, Tungsten Brilliant
Brand Marketing

If you would be a real seeker after truth, it is

necessary that at least once in your life you
doubt, as far as possible, all things. — Rene
Descartes, philosopher

The first precept was never to accept a thing

as true until I knew it as such without a
single doubt. — Rene Descartes

When in doubt, find another sponsor. When

in trouble, hire a wrangler. Because there’s
never enough time. And there never will be.
— Hilary De Vries, entertainment journalist,
The Gift Bag Chronicles
When you don't know what to do, walk fast
and look worried. — Dilbert's Laws of Work
When in doubt, do as the Romans do. —
Hugh D. Dillehay

When in doubt, give a book. — Discount

Portland Guide

When in doubt, try the nearest bad guy. —

Jimmy Dix, character in The Last Boy Scout
movie

In my book, if you fail at donuts, you’ve

failed at life. — donut manager, character in
Madonna: Innocence Lost TV movie
When in doubt, I’ve found retracing your
steps a wise place to begin. — Albus
Dumbledore, character in Harry Potter and
the Prisoner of Azkaban movie
E
If in doubt, farm it out. — The Economist
magazine headline

Two people only hurt each other if they

doubt the love they have for one another. —
Tom Edison, character in Dogville movie
Real love is more than a physical feeling. If
there's even the slightest doubt in your head
about a guy, then forget about it. It's not
real. — Ethan Embry

Finish each day and be done with it. You

have done what you could. Some blunders
and absurdities no doubt crept in, forget
them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new
day, you shall begin it well and serenely. —
Ralph Waldo Emerson, essayist
When in doubt, ask your tailor. — Esquire
magazine’s The New Laws of Fashion

Freedom of speech and freedom of action

are meaningless without freedom to think.
And there is no freedom of thought without
doubt. — Bergen Evans, author, The Natural
History of Nonsense
F
There is no harm in doubt and skepticism,
for it is through these that new discoveries
are made. — Richard Feynman, physicist

What every computer consultant needs to

know: 1) In case of doubt, make it sound
convincing. 2) Do not believe in miracles.
Rely on them. — Finagle's Rules
When in doubt, don’t pitch it out. — football
option rule

If you don't know what to do with many of

the papers piled on your desk, stick a dozen
colleagues' initials on 'em, and pass them
along. When in doubt, route. — Malcolm
Forbes, magazine publisher

When in doubt, duck. — Malcolm Forbes,

magazine publisher

When in doubt, make a western. — John

Ford, movie director
Lord, make me an instrument of your peace.
Where there is hatred, let me sow love.
Where there is injury, pardon. Where there
is doubt, faith. Where there is despair,
home, Where there is darkness, light. Where
there is sadness, joy. — Saint Francis of
Assisi, Prayer of St. Francis

When in doubt, don’t. — Ben Franklin,

inventor, patriot, scientist, author, publisher,
statesman
When in doubt, medicate. — Dr. Ian
Frechette, character in Cupid TV show

When in doubt, destroy. Even if you go down

with your captive. — J. E. Freedman, Above
the Law

When in doubt, gallop! — proverb of the

French Foreign Legion
When in doubt, just include those four
letters we all love
to see in print—FREE. — Albert Fried-
Cassorla
G

When in doubt, don’t think too much. Close

your eyes, play, and have fun. — Dave
Gage, author, Harmonica Lessons.com

When in doubt, get up off the chair and

stand up for practicing and jamming to
facilitate good breathing habits. Try to stand
erect with your head up, back straight, and
body relaxed. — Dave Gage, author,
Harmonica Lessons.com
When in doubt, lick your lips. — Dave Gage,
author, Harmonica Lessons.com

Doubt is the father of invention. — Galileo

Galilei, astronomer

When in doubt, call a pro. — Jackie Gallogly,

marketing technology officer, Inbox
Interactive

If in doubt, always follow your nose. —

Gandalf the wizard in The Fellowship of the
Ring movie

When in doubt, do without. — Samuel ben

Hofni Gaon, rabbi
When in doubt, apply booze. — Luke
Garrison, character in novel, Above the Law
by J. E. Freedman

When in doubt, don’t. — Saul Gellerman,

academic

For the truly faithful, no miracle is

necessary. For those who doubt, no miracle
is sufficient. — Nancy Gibbs

Doubt is a pain too lonely to know that faith

is his twin brother. — Kahlil Gibran, poet

Believe those who are seeking the truth.

Doubt those who find it. — Andre Gidé,
novelist and critic

If you must tell me your opinions, tell me

what you believe in. I have plenty of doubts
of my own. — Johann Wolfgang von Goethe,
poet and essayist

We know accurately only when we know

little; with knowledge doubt increases. —
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, poet and
essayist
When in doubt, peddle disinformation. —
Dave Goldberg, football writer

When in doubt, go defense. — Dave

Goldberg, football writer

A mind troubled by doubt cannot focus on

the course to victory. — Arthur Golden,
novelist, Memoirs of a Geisha
It is a great thing to know exactly what to do
in an emergency. When in doubt whether to
attack or retreat, I never hesitate a moment.
I toss a copper. — Gordon Granger, general

When in doubt, do more homework. — Andy

Green

When in doubt, trust your instincts. — Andy

Green

When in doubt, go with the little voice in

your head. — Andy Green
When in doubt, ask what your mom would
do. — Andy Green

When in doubt, ask what would a horse do in

this situation. — Andy Green

When in doubt, ask what would Abraham

Lincoln do in this situation. — Andy Green

Doubt 'til thou canst doubt no more...doubt

is thought and thought is life. Systems which
end doubt are devices for drugging thought.
— Albert Guerard
When in doubt, press a lot of buttons. —
Gyro, the scientist (Donald Duck show)
H

When in doubt, make a fool of yourself.

There is a microscopically thin line between
being brilliantly creative and acting like the
most gigantic idiot on earth. So what the
hell, leap. — Cynthia Heimel
When in doubt, punt. — John Heisman,
football coach

When in doubt, don’t. — Jim Hendrickson,

mergers and acquisitions

When in doubt, eat parsley. — Julia Hidy,

author
Wise men, when in doubt whether to speak
or to keep quiet, give themselves the benefit
of the doubt, and remain silent. — Napoleon
Hill, motivational author

When in doubt, you guess New Jersey. —

Gary Hobson, character in Early Edition TV
show

When facing a difficult task, act as though

it's impossible to fail. When going after
Moby Dick, take along the tartar sauce! —
Joel Hodgson, host, Mystery Science Theater
3000 TV show

Our achievements speak for themselves.

What we have to keep track of are our
failures, discouragements and doubts. We
tend to forget the past difficulties, the many
false starts, and the painful groping. We see
our past achievements as the end results of
a clean forward thrust, and our present
difficulties as signs of decline and decay. —
Eric Hoffer, psychologist

When in doubt, do it. — Oliver Wendell

Holmes Jr., author

To have doubted one's own first principles is

the mark of a civilized man. — Oliver
Wendell Holmes Jr., author

When all other contingencies fail, whatever

remains however improbable must be the
truth. — Sherlock Holmes, character in
Sherlock Holmes and the Case of the Silk
Stocking TV movie
When in doubt, don't open other people's
mail! — Pat Holt, editor

When in doubt, taunt. — Pat Holt, editor

When in doubt, blame it on the brick-and-

mortars! — Pat Holt, editor

When in doubt, try this mantra: Precise and

spare; precise and spare; precise and spare.
— Pat Holt, editor

When in doubt, go broad. — Gregory House,

character in House, M.D. TV show
When in doubt, follow someone. — David
Housewright, quoting from Chapter Four of
the Universal Private Eye Instruction
Manual, Third Edition

When in doubt, ask for permission. — E.

Keith Howick Jr., publisher
So that is the basic lesson that anybody
learns in this universe. They learn to keep
their mouth shut, and it’s the wrong lesson.
When in doubt, talk. When in doubt,
communicate. — L. Ron Hubbard, founder of
Scientology

When in doubt, attack Iraq. — Mike Hume,

editor, Spiked Online
I
Doubt is the beginning, not the end, of
wisdom. — George Iles

Confusion is always the most honest

response. — Marty Indik

When in doubt, don't bother. — Internet

humor
When in doubt, ignore it. — Internet humor
J
When perplexed, confused, frustrated and
all else has failed, fall back on the truth. —
J’s Business Maxim

When in doubt, risk it. — Holbrook Jackson,

editor and journalist

Secret #434: The boss is never wrong.

Secret #435: When in doubt, see secret
#434.
— Jimmy James, character in NewsRadio TV
show

When angry, count ten before you speak; if

very angry, a hundred. — Thomas Jefferson,
U.S. president
K

When in doubt, remove your hat. — George

Kalogerakis

When in doubt, blame Clinton/Gore. —

Madeleine Begun Kane
When in doubt, print 'em out. — Karl's
Programming Proverb 0x7

When in doubt, throw a whole lot of onion

and garlic seeds around. — Karen Keefe

When in doubt, look intelligent. — Garrison

Keillor, radio personality

Chest pain: When in doubt, have it seen….

So if you suspect that you might be having a
heart attack, call 911 immediately—it may
be well worth the money. — Richard Kerber,
professor of internal medicine
Doubt yourself and you doubt everything
you see. Judge yourself and you see judges
everywhere. But if you listen to the sound of
your own voice, you can rise above doubt
and judgment. And you can see forever. —
Nancy Kerrigan, ice skater

If my parents still get upset over the

obscene portion size of American food, I
seriously doubt I'm gonna make any inroads
with Eminem. — Lane Kim, character in
Gilmore Girls TV show

When in doubt, order the burger. The best

advice my father ever gave me: If you're in
an establishment where the food is
questionable, you go with the hamburger
every single time. — Jimmy Kimmel, TV host

When in doubt, I say go young. — Peter

King, sports columnist

When in doubt, reboot. — Dennis Kneale

When in doubt, simplify. — Chuck Knox,
football coach
There are two ways to slide easily through
life; to believe everything or to doubt
everything. Both ways save us from
thinking. — Alfred Korzybski, logician and
scientist

A weak man has doubts before a decision, a

strong man has them afterwards. — Karl
Kraus, journalist

In case of doubt, decide in favor of what is

correct. — Karl Kraus, journalist

When in doubt, do it today! — John Kremer

It really doesn’t take many words to tell a
story, make a joke, or move people to tears
of laughter or sorrow. When in doubt, cut
some more. — John Kremer, author
L
Never doubt the courage of the French. They
were the ones who discovered that snails
are edible. — Doug Larson, humorist

When in doubt, choose black. — Jeanne

Marie Laskas’s fashion advice
When in doubt, choke him out. — Gene
LeBell, grappling master

When in doubt, it is best to lean to the side

of mercy. — Legal Maxim

To believe with certainty we must begin with

doubting. — Stanislaus Lescynski

When in doubt, use parsley. — Amy Lester,

blogger
When in doubt, go down. — Michael Levine,
publicist, Levine Breaking News

If all else fails, the character of a man can

be recognized by nothing so surely as by a
jest which he takes badly. — Georg
Christoph Lichtenberg, physicist and satirist

One's first step in wisdom is to question

everything—and one's last is to come to
terms with everything. — Georg Christoph
Lichtenberg, physicist and satirist

First there is a time when we believe

everything, then for a little while we believe
with discrimination, then we believe nothing
whatever, and then we believe everything
again—and, moreover, give reasons why we
believe. — Georg Christoph Lichtenberg,
physicist and satirist
It is better to remain silent and be thought a
fool than to speak out and remove all doubt.
— Abraham Lincoln, U.S. president

Gentlemen of the jury. Law says that a man

can not be found guilty if there's a
reasonable doubt in the minds of the jury. I
aim to raise that doubt in your minds,
friends. — Abe Lincoln, character in Abe
Lincoln: Freedom Fighter movie

If we are ever in doubt about what to do, it

is a good rule to ask ourselves what we shall
wish on the morrow that we had done. —
John Lubbock, politician and biologist
Look at a man in the midst of doubt and
danger, and you will learn in his hour of
adversity what he really is. — Lucretius,
poet

When in doubt, lie. — Mr. Lyle, character in

The Pretender TV series

When in doubt, take it as a compliment. —

Angie Lyman
M
When in doubt, faith it. — Wayne Mackey

So when in doubt, you kiss Craig? — Craig

Manning, character in Degrassi: The Next
Generation TV series

When in doubt, admit it. Be truthful about

your own skills and abilities. Take
responsibility for informing others when you
need additional support and training. —
March of Dimes web site, Rules for the Road

When in doubt, blame the patriarchy first.

The first person to blame for something is
The Man. — Amanda Marcotte, blogger

It is easier to believe than to doubt. —

Everett D. Martin

When in doubt, write about a funeral. —

Frank McCourt, author, Angela's Ashes

When all else fails, blame the other woman.

— D.A. Jack McCoy, character in Law &
Order TV show

When in doubt, procrastinate now! — Fred

Mercer
When in doubt, predict that the present
trend will continue. — Merkin's Maxim

If you think you’ve hit a false note, sing

loud. When in doubt, sing loud. — Robert
Merrill, composer
When in doubt, spend gobs of cash on ads in
all the major newspapers on a one-day
rampage against government. That always
beats befriending politicians and
bureaucrats. — Top 10 Microsoft Non-
Monopolistic Slogans

In case of doubt, do a little more than you

have to. — Warren Mitchell, actor

I respect faith, but doubt is what gets you an

education. — Wilson Mizner, screenwriter

When in doubt, shred it. — Russell Mokhiber

and Robert Weissman, authors, Corporate
Predators
Doubts are more cruel than the worst of
truths. — Moliere, dramatist

To philosophize is to doubt. — Michel de

Montaigne, essayist

When in doubt, go higher. — Mountain

Gazette motto

When in doubt, shout back. And shout

louder. — Mike Muldoon, Navy Seal
character in Suzanne Brockmann's Into the
Night
Have a delay button (preferably 20 seconds
or more) and when in doubt, use it. — Erich
Mancow Muller, radio personality, Mancow’s
Commandments for Radio Personalities

Knowledge and personality make doubt

possible, but knowledge is also the cure of
doubt; and when we get a full and adequate
sense of personality we are lifted into a
region where doubt is almost impossible, for
no man can know himself as he is, and all
fullness of his nature, without also knowing
God. — T. T. Munger
When in doubt, empty your magazine. —
Murphy's Rules of Combat Operations

When in doubt, belly buttons belong on MTV,

guitars on VH-1. — My Generation magazine
N

When in doubt, hold it or throw it away. —

Jim Nance, football commentator

Frantic orthodoxy is never rooted in faith but

in doubt. It is when we are unsure that we
are doubly sure. — Reinhold Niebuhr,
theologian
When in doubt, sweat it out! — Jay North,
author, How Safe is Your Food? Miracles in
the Kitchen

When in doubt, whip it out. — Ted Nugent,

rock musician and gun advocate (quoted by
David Spade)
O
When in doubt, do it yourself. — Keith
Olberman, sports commentator

When in danger,
When in doubt,
Run in circles,
Scream and shout.
— Old Sailor's Proverb

When in doubt, get a doughnut. Many of the

bad things that happen in cars driven by
teenagers happen because a kid is ticked
off, heartbroken, disappointed, tired, or
depressed…. Pulling over for a doughnut
and coffee is the perfect antidote to anxiety.
— Hugh O’Neill, magazine columnist

In our brief national history we have shot

four of our presidents, worried five of them
to death, impeached one and hounded
another out of office. And when all else fails,
we hold an election and assassinate their
character. — P. J. O'Rourke, humorist
P

When in doubt, read the book. — Alan

Parker, movie director

Chill: When in doubt, throw it out…. Never

taste food that looks or smells strange to
see if you can still use it. Just discard it. —
Partnership for Food Safety Education

When in doubt, kill cute things. — Stephan

Pastis, author
When in doubt, observe and ask questions.
When certain, observe at length and ask
many more questions. — George Patton,
general

When in doubt, attack. — Dave Pell, blogger,

davenetics

Doubt is the key to knowledge. — Persian

proverb

If we get our information from the biblical

material there is no doubt that the Christian
life is a dancing, leaping, daring life. —
Eugene Peterson

When in doubt about using a trademark in

your meta tag, leave it out. — Lisa Picarille,
editor

When in doubt, put on the Finding Nemo

DVD. I think it’s a wonderful movie, but the
kids feel that way, too. — Mohammed Pinto,
children’s entertainer

When in doubt, leave it out. Don't rely solely

on lawyers. — Brian Pittman, editor, Master
Journalist

When in doubt, add more wine. — plaque

When in doubt … shop. — Stephanie Plum,
bounty hunter character in Ten Big Ones by
Janet Evanovich
In other words, if all that are available are
the percentages, the X chart provides an
excellent approximation to the p chart. The
same conclusion applies to data for the np
chart, c chart, u chart, sigma chart, etc. In
all these cases, and more, the Swiss army
knife of control charts allows the process
operator to focus on data. One could even
argue that the simplicity of using a single
chart instead of several charts outweighs
the mathematical advantages in many
cases. So, when in doubt, get the X chart
out. — Thomas Pyzdek, president, Quality
Publishing
R

When in doubt, always hide secret formulas

in your bra. Then make out with Val Kilmer.
— Brian Raftery, journalist

When in doubt, kill. — Rambo, character in

First Light movie
Fidelity to commitment in the face of doubts
and fears is a very spiritual thing. — Real
Live Preacher

We think having faith means being

convinced God exists in the same way we
are convinced a chair exists. People who
cannot be completely convinced of God’s
existence think faith is impossible for them.
Not so. People who doubt can have great
faith because faith is something you do, not
something you think. In fact, the greater
your doubt, the more heroic your faith. —
Real Live Preacher

The only limit to our realization of tomorrow

will be our doubts of today. — Franklin D.
Roosevelt, U.S. president
The country needs and, unless I mistake its
temper, the country demands bold,
persistent, experimentation. It is common
sense to take a method and try it, if it fails,
admit it frankly and try another. But above
all, try something. — Theodore Roosevelt,
U.S. president

When in doubt, compartmentalize. — M. J.

Rose, blogger and novelist

There is no doubt in my mind that there are

many ways to be a winner, but there is
really only one way to be a loser and that is
to fail and not look beyond the failure. —
Kyle Rote, Jr.
When in doubt, hold on to your altitude. No
one has ever collided with the sky. — Rules
of the Air

If in doubt, don't. Beware the man

possessed of little self-doubt. — Donald
Rumsfeld, U.S. secretary of defense

If in doubt, don't. If still in doubt, do what's

right. — Donald Rumsfeld, U.S. secretary of
defense

I believe that the first test of a truly great

man is his humility. I don't mean by
humility, doubt of his power. But really great
men have a curious feeling that the
greatness is not of them, but through them.
And they see something divine in every
other man and are endlessly, foolishly,
incredibly merciful. — John Ruskin, essayist
and reformer

The whole problem with the world is that

fools and fanatics are always so certain of
themselves, but wiser people so full of
doubts. — Bertrand Russell, philosopher and
mathematician

I think we ought always to entertain our

opinions with some measure of doubt. I
shouldn't wish people dogmatically to
believe any philosophy, not even mine. —
Bertrand Russell, philosopher and
mathematician

????
In all affairs it's a healthy thing now and
then to hang a question mark on the things
you have long taken for granted. — Bertrand
Russell, philosopher and mathematician
S

On plagiarism: When in doubt, check it out!

— Safety Net @2learn.ca

When in doubt, blame Israel. — Alex Safian,

associate director, Committee for Accuracy
in Middle East Reporting in America

Whenever there is any doubt, there is no

doubt. That's the first thing they teach you.
— Sam, character in Ronin movie

When in doubt, blame the writers. — Mark

Sarvas, blogger, Elegant Variation
Don’t email if you don’t have to. When in
doubt, initiate face-to-face dialogs
(shudder). — Will Schwalbe and David
Shipley, authors, Send: The Essential Guide
to Email for Office and Home

When in doubt, nuke ‘em…. We risk

escalating a worldwide nuclear arms race in
order to nuke a shadow terrorist enemy
whose most effective military weapon to
date has been box cutters. — Robert Scheer,
columnist

When in doubt, mumble. — Michael

Schubert, blogger
When in doubt, if you or someone you are
with begins to have chest discomfort,
especially with one or more of the other
signs of a heart attack, call 9-1-1 right away.
Don’t wait for more than a few minutes—5
minutes at most—to call 9-1-1. —
SeekWellness.com

Our doubts are traitors,

And make us lose the good we oft might win
By fearing to attempt.
— William Shakespeare, playwright,
Measure for Measure

When in doubt, insert a scene set at a strip

club, no matter how irrelevant. When it
comes to cheap titillation, there's nothing
like nearly naked showgirls caressing metal
poles. — Tom Shales, screenwriter

When in doubt, back out on a technicality. —

Walter Shapiro, political columnist, USA
Today

When in doubt, attack immigrants. — Scott

Shields, journalist (in a story on a political
campaign)
When in doubt, go back to the evidence. —
Sidney
Liberty is the possibility of doubting, the
possibility of making a mistake, the
possibility of searching and experimenting,
the possibility of saying No to any authority
—literary, artistic, philosophic, religious,
social and even political. — Ignazio Silone,
author, The God That Failed

Doubt is part of all religion. All the religious

thinkers were doubters. — Isaac Bashevis
Singer, novelist

When in doubt, fuck. — Lt. Col. Frank Slade,

character in Scent of a Woman movie
When you cannot make up your mind which
of the two evenly balanced courses of action
you should do, choose the bolder. — W. J.
Slim

When in doubt, tell the truth. — Spenser's

rules (Robert B. Parker)

You leave Earth and anything you forget to

bring with you will kill you. Anything you do
bring with you which doesn't work properly
will kill you. When in doubt, just assume
everything will kill you. — Nathan Spring,
character in Star Cops movie

When in doubt, follow the yellow brick road.

— Bernard J. Srode, author, When in Doubt,
Follow the Yellow Book Road

To believe with certainty we must begin by

doubting. — Stanislas I, king of Poland

When in doubt, pinky out. — Patrick Star,

character in SpongeBob SquarePants TV
show

When in doubt, hedge. — Linda Stern,

business journalist, Newsweek
There's only one thing I know about cooking:
When in doubt, add enough butter to grease
Wyoming. — Ed Stevens, character in Ed TV
show

When in doubt, assume it’s a clue. — Jesse

Stone, character in Death in Paradise TV
movie

When in doubt, throw it out. — Vicki Sue

When in doubt who will win, be neutral. —

Swiss proverb

Dubito ergo sum. I doubt therefore I am. —

Kayvan Sylvan
T
When in doubt, let it out. — tailor for Robin
K. Blum

When in doubt, leave it out. If you have to

ask yourself, or your roommate, or your
spouse, “Is this okay to wear?” then your
answer is a definite “No.” If you are
hesitating about it, listen to your intuition
talking and pick something else. — Kim
Taylor, owner, The Taylored Approach
There lives more faith in honest doubt,
believe me, than in half the creeds. — Alfred
Lord Tennyson, poet

When in doubt, go with the short cut. —

Herbie Teope

If I could only have one food for the rest of

my life? That's easy. Pez. Cherry flavor Pez.
There's no doubt about it. — Vern Tessio,
character in Stand by Me movie

When in doubt, use brute force. — Ken

Thompson

When in doubt, follow the leaders. —

Thompson's Cigar Company newspaper ad
Faith keeps many doubts in her pay. If I
could not doubt, I should not believe. —
Henry David Thoreau, essayist

When in doubt, go big. — Mike Tice, football

coach

When in doubt, my dear fellow, do nothing.

— Leo Tolstoy, novelist, War and Peace

When in doubt, send plain text email, not

HTML. — Heinz Tschabitscher, About.com
email guide

When all else fails, manipulate the data. —

T-shirt saying
When in doubt in a tight football game, you
have to stretch out the ball. — TV announcer

As to the adjective, when in doubt, strike it

out. — Mark Twain, novelist

It is better to keep your mouth closed and

let people think you are a fool than to open
it and remove all doubt. — Mark Twain,
novelist

When in doubt, tell the truth. — Mark Twain,

novelist
If a person offend you and you are in doubt
as to whether it was intentional or not, do
not resort to extreme measures. Simply
watch your chance and hit him with a brick.
— Mark Twain, novelist, Advice to Youth
U
When in doubt, call them out. — The Rule of
the Umpire

Life is doubt, and faith without doubt is

nothing but death. — Miguel De Unamuno,
philosopher
When in doubt, win the trick. — unknown
card player

When in doubt, shout! — unknown

Feed your faith and doubt will starve to

death. — unknown

When everything else fails, read the

instructions. — unknown

When in doubt, pout. — unknown

When in doubt, ask. When not in doubt, ask.

— unknown
When in doubt, give advice. — unknown

When in doubt, follow your heart, —

unknown

When in doubt, dress up. You just can't go

wrong. — Chase Untermeyer

Beliefs are what divide people. Doubt unites

them. — Peter Ustinov, actor
V

When in doubt, you should thank your

mother. — novelist Jennifer Vanderbes’s
mother
Human beings are perhaps never more
frightening than when they are convinced
beyond doubt that they are right. — Laurens
Van der Post, author, The Lost World of the
Kalahari

Doubt is not a pleasant condition, but

certainty is absurd. — Voltaire, philosopher
W
First rule of a detective: When in doubt,
hesitate. — V.I. Warshawski, fictional
detective

When in doubt, give us a gift certificate to a

spa. When you’re sure, give us a diamond
ring. — Kerry Washington, actress, “Ten
Things You Don’t Know About Women” in
Esquire magazine

When in doubt, do the obvious. — Franklin

Watts, pubisher

When in doubt, talk to the union people

themselves and play upon their mercy. —
Philip Weintraub
When in doubt, have fun with it. — Ernie
Wickbaugh

Focus more on your desire than on your

doubt, and the dream will take care of itself.
You may be surprised at how easily this
happens. Your doubts are not as powerful as
your desires, unless you make them so. —
Marcia Wieder, motivational speaker and
author

Without doubt, success brings with it greater

opportunities for failure. — Bruce Wilkinson,
preacher, The Prayer of Jabez

When in doubt, go for the dick joke. — Robin

Williams, comedian and actor

The vain man is generally a doubter. It is

Newton who sees himself as child on the sea
shore, and his discoveries in the colored
shell. — Willmott
When in doubt, blame the server. — Don
Willmott, PC Magazine
When in doubt, strike it out. — Pudd'nhead
Wilson, character in novel by Mark Twain

I am Klingon. If you doubt it, a

demonstration can be arranged. — Lt. Worf,
character in Star Trek: The Next Generation
TV show

When in doubt, just remember the golden

rule: “Do unto others as you would have
others do unto your girlfriend as you
masturbate quietly nearby.” — Stacey
Grenrock Woods, sex columnist, Esquire
magazine
Y

When in doubt, take it out. — Kitty Bean

Yancey, editor

If there is any doubt in your mind, you

should plead, not guilty. — Major Sinclair
Yeates, character in The Irish R.M. movie

When in doubt, bus. — YouthSpace.net

comment
Z

This I do know beyond any reasonable

doubt. Regardless of what you are doing, if
you pump long enough, hard enough and
enthusiastically enough, sooner or later the
effort will bring forth the reward. — Zig
Ziglar, salesman and motivational speaker
When in doubt, abstain. — Zoroaster,
religious leader and founder of
Zoroastrianism
 Epilog
If you like the above quotations, you’ll love
the other books in the Quotable Books
series. For sample quotations from these
books, see my Quotable Books website:
http://www.quotablebooks.com.

The Art of Living: Artists, Photographers,

Architects, Designers, Cartoonists, Poets,
Writers, Novelists, and Critics on Art and Life

The Big Bad Book of Ifs . . .

The Boob Tube Guide to Life

Bumper Sticker Wisdom and Other

Proverbs

The Business of Life: Business people and

others on life, business, careers, jobs, the
workplace, investments, economics, money,
and more

Children: A Quotable Guide for Parents

The Do’s and Don’t’s of Life

Double Your Fun: Two Thoughts Are Better

Than One

Food for Thought: All about Food,

Feasting, Diet, Drinks, and Drugs

Greatness and Humility: Two sides of the

same coin

How to Act: Advice on How to Live and Act

from Actors, Comedians, Directors,
Producers, Playwrights, and Screenwriters

It’s Time for a Change: Thoughts on

Change, Growth, Progress, Risk, and
Evolution

Life & Death: It’s Really a Simple Matter

The Magazine Advertiser’s Guide to

Success in Business and Life

The Magic of Life

The Music of Life: Singers, Musicians,

Composers, and Dancers on Life and Music
The Myriad Websters Dictionary: The
Dictionary of the People, by the People, and
for the People

The Never-Never Land Guide to Life

The Never-Never Land Guide to Love

and Romance

The Politics of Life: Thoughts on life,

death, and politics from politicians,
statesmen, environmentalists, civil rights
leaders, historians, economists, military
leaders, and social commentators

The Richness of Life

The Science of Life: Scientists, Inventors,

and Philosophers on the Art and Science of
Living

The Secret Life of Pets and Animals

Senior Moments: On Growing Older and

Wiser

The Spirit of Success

The Sport of Life: How to Win in Life and

Sports
Thanks for the Memories: The Role of
Gratitude, Thankfulness, Forgiveness,
Kindness, Generosity, and Respect in
Creating a Good Life

Travel and Home: All about the pleasures

of home, travel, and everywhere in between

The TV Advertiser’s Guide to Life

The War Between Men and Women: On

Men, Women, Sex, Love, Relationships,
Dating, Marriage, Divorce, and Much, Much
More …

Illustrated Titles
The Best Things in Life Are Free: My
Favorite Quotations

How to Live Your Dreams

If at First You Don’t Succeed, Try, Try

Again

If God Intended Man to Smoke, He’d

Have Set Him on Fire … and Other
Conclusions of God’s Work

If I Had My Life to Live Over . . .

The Miracle of Life

Playing the Percentages: Lies, Damned

Funny Lies, Statistics, and Everything in
Between

When in Doubt, Kiss the Fish — And

Other Extremely Wise Advice

Joke Collections
The Big Bad Book of Blonde Jokes

Mother-in-Law: The Mother of All Joke

Books