Foster 1 Jordan Foster Ms. Ingram 1102.

24 November 27, 2012 1102: Delving Deeper Into the Writing Process Throughout the English 1102 course this semester, I have been assigned various assignments that have allowed me as a writer to independently research and develop a firm argument of what I believe it means to be healthy. Beginning with the book Peace, Butter, and Jelly, I was able to form my opinion of what I thought it meant to be healthy. This book allowed me to grasp the authors view on life and possibly experiment with his peaceful, relaxing, and positive mind-set. The annotated bibliography assignment continued my journey into the writing process by researching scholars facts and claims about positive psychology, which I would research throughout the semester. With valuable research in hand, I was able to broaden my perspective on positive psychology by exploring the different viewpoints of this practice. Finally, I was able to gather all my beliefs, research, and various viewpoints to create an argumentative essay that would appeal to a reader interested in the positive effects of positive psychology. I feel that every assignment I completed came together in forming my semester long inquiry question of what it means to be healthy. Each assignment allowed me as a writer to think critically and delve into the writing process. Most importantly these assignments allowed me to take responsibility for how successful I wanted to be in this class by committing to rigorous note taking, research, reading, and listening to others. By the end of this semester I have learned how

Foster 2 to become a part of the writing community and take all the steps necessary in the writing process to become an independent, engaged writer. I have organized my portfolio in chronological order by the assignments, periodically weaving in my evidence of process work, responses, artifacts, and daily entries from my writers notebook into my essay and Weebly to show my progress throughout this course. The first assignment was to compose an essay describing what its like to be you. In my evidence from one of my daily entries in my writers notebook located under the assignment 1 tab, I chose to include the book blurb assignment. When revising, this assignment refreshed my memory of how David explained his life. In my second draft I noticed how I focused too much on the dull, negatives of my childhood. Re-reading the book blurb reminded me how David never seemed to dwell on the past because he focuses on peace. He focuses on positive aspects of his life and when he did refer to something negative in his life he explains he was still thankful. Since his form of writing appealed to me as a reader, I made the decision to brighten up the tone of my explanation of what it is like to be me by elaborating on being content in the present and adding exciting plans for my future. I feel this revision is more effective when trying to interest the reader. I included a response from one of my group mates in my evidence in which she explains she would like to know what I am studying now, and to add more detail about my life. In my second draft I completely left out my plans for the future and aspects of my life that I am experiencing now. When revising my final draft, I added much more detail about my present and future mainly because I did not want the reader to question how my life is now. I decided to add one important quality about myself that I left out in my second draft and that is how adventurous I am. This quality completely explains what it is like to be me. By exposing the reader to this

Foster 3 quality, I feel like in my revised essay the audience can get a better understanding of my dreams to travel and what I plan to do in my future. Brightening up my past, adding more detail about the present, and explaining my plan for the future in my revised essay allows the reader to get a full understanding of what it is like to be me, unlike my second draft which solely focused on my past. As a part of the writing process I had to investigate the academic conversation that was being said about my topic I chose, which was positive psychology. In my evidence presented as an artifact under the assignment 2 tab, I chose to include an excerpt from the book Peace, Butter, and Jelly that influenced me to choose my topic of positive psychology. By being engaged in the reading, I was able to understand just how positive and thankful David is. To lose a job and a baby is extremely depressing, but by explaining that his wife and him hugged and were thankful again really stood out to me. I began to feel a personal investment in the topic because being a negative person myself, I felt like beginning to practice a positive mind-set might make my life more fulfilling. Adamantly, I chose to research positive psychology and its positive effects on health. Also as a part of my evidence, I included a brainstorming activity that my group did of what we thought it meant to be healthy. Since I was reminded of Davids healthy lifestyle and how positive he is, positive mind-set immediately appealed to what I thought it meant to be healthy. If I would not have taken responsibility for my learning by reading the assignment, I would not have come across Davids example of remaining at peace. Being interested in the topic motivated me to research as much as I could about the positive effects of keeping a positive mind-set, mainly because I wanted to learn from this practice myself.

Foster 4 After choosing my topic I began researching positive psychology in order to complete my annotated bibliography assignment. Looking at feedback I had received and even given, included in my evidence under the assignment 2 tab, I realized I left out an important requirement in my second draft. I vaguely, or did not include who the audience of the source was meant for and the credibility of the source. To strengthen the validity of my argument and sources, I incorporated the sources meant audience and the credibility of the source. For one of my sources in the annotated bibliography 2nd draft, I did not acknowledge exactly who the audience was. In my revision I included who the source was appealing to by incorporating the sentence, the writers hope to appeal to an audience of individuals or scholars who want to get more empirical evidence that proves the correlation between practicing positive psychology, developing goals, and avoiding developing depression. This sentence summarizes the source, also including who the audience is. The credibility of this source is strengthened by this sentence because now the reader knows the source has empirical evidence that can be studied to prove the correlation between being positive and not developing depression. An audience typically interested in a source with empirical evidence may be scholars in the field looking for evidence or even individuals who are skeptical of the practice and need proof of the correlation. By adding this detail to the annotation, the reader can be more convinced of the validity and credibility of the source, rather than if I left it out like in my 2nd draft. Another revision I made in my annotated bibliography was splitting the huge paragraph I had for each source into two paragraphs. As a part of the writing process, organization has been important in effectively getting the point across to the reader. Using the side shadowing handout like I did for my WILTBY essay, one big paragraph was too jumbled, out of order, and did not flow. I organized the paragraphs by having the credibility of the source and identifying the

Foster 5 audience in one paragraph and included the summary of the source in the other paragraph. This revision greatly improved the flow of the paragraphs and is more likely to appeal to the audience. Having my annotated bibliography completed, I was ready to complete assignment 3 which was the 3-Sided-Exercise. This exercise allowed me to broaden my knowledge of the academic conversation of positive psychology and what groups use this practice. Feedback written on my second draft from classmates, included in my evidence under the assignment 3 tab, proved that I needed to revise this essay. Clarification of the groups and defining positive psychology was included in the feedback. I also included a warm up activity where I question how I can clearly portray the groups viewpoints without tying them together. In my second draft I was not clear in defining what the three viewpoints were and struggled with not tying the viewpoints together. In my revision of the 2nd essay I chose to add the sentence Most people associate positive psychology practices with an individual, but other groups that support positive psychology practices are communities, health facilities, and counselors as well. This transition sentence in my introduction clearly portrays to the reader that communities, health facilities, and counselors are going to be the groups discussed in the essay. I also chose to write about each specific viewpoint separately, but tying them together in the conclusion because positive psychology believers do recognize that the practice is a cycle. I added the sentence together, communities, health departments, and counselors are trying to promote positive psychology because this practice forms positive communities and individuals who are healthy and flourishing. This sentence concludes and points out that together the groups are promoting the practice, although they have different but similar viewpoints. Each group believes the practice will allow any institution or individual to flourish.

Foster 6 In our final assignment, which was to orchestrate an argumentative essay, I focused on persuading the audience that practicing positive psychology can help avoid physical and mental sickness. I included a warm up activity that I did in class under the assignment 4 tab, where I brainstormed who I wanted my audience to be and the argument I wanted to make. This activity helped me to clearly lay out my objectives that I wanted to discuss and focus on in my essay. I relied on this activity to make sure every paragraph focused on these ideas and was meaningful in portraying my argument. Notes from the reading included under the assignment 4 tab, guided my decisions in how I would effectively revise my essay by being reminded of appeals that are effective and different ways to situate my evidence and quotes. When revising this essay, my main focus was to effectively introduce quotes. I included notes I took on the reading about ethos, pathos, and logos, rhetorical appeals important to convincing a reader of my argument. I wanted to strengthen ethos in my revised essay because the most important aspect of my argument was proving that there is a correlation between practicing positive psychology and a lesser chance of developing depression and sickness. These notes helped me when introducing my quotes because I was reminded of each detail I needed to include to make sure I alluded to the credibility of the source. In my revision, I took out a less reliable source and replaced it with a quote that comes from a very strong source. My original source came from an internet site, where as the quote I used is from a published book by author William Lovallo. This source is much more reliable in proving the fact that stress is related to health and has been researched since the early 1900s. I quoted the source with the sentence, author William Lovallo explains that since Selyes (1936) work, we have known that high levels of cortisol occurring during states of stress can alter immune system tissues and suppress immune system responses (Lovallo). This quote not only

Foster 7 summarizes the process in which stress affects the immune system, but also proves that this topic has been research notably since the early 1900s. The quote also hits on the claim that this fact is already known and proven. Using this source strengthens ethos in my essay because this evidence conveys to the reader that I am knowledgeable about this correlation and understand the complexity of how stress affects immune system responses. Tying in my topic with another class, I added an artifact as a part of my evidence. This artifact was a reading assignment that I had in my psychology lab course. I was surprised when I began to read the article because the topic of positive psychology is what I researched all semester long, and is now the topic of a reading assignment in another class. I decided to quote this source in my revision of my argumentative essay because I was still questioning whether or not I had mentioned the details of how positive emotions can positively affect an individuals health. The sentence, negative emotions, with their heightened and often prolonged cardiovascular activation, have been implicated in the etiology of coronary heart diseaserelaxation techniques are known to reduce blood pressure in hypertensive adults(Fredrickson) does not generalize the opinions that stress positively effects health. This quote specifically explains how stress provokes the cardiovascular system. This quote strengthened ethos in my essay, my main objective in revising this essay. My last piece of evidence I included was a warm up activity where I assess how I think the fall semester going. In my first sentence I explain how this semester has been really stressful. By spending a whole semester on researching and arguing that positive psychology is a meaningful practice, I can use the practices I have learned to decrease the chances of feeling too much stress. By delving into the writing process and forming a personal investment in the topic of positive psychology, I can use the exercises I have learned to avoid succumbing to stress. I

Foster 8 have been able to apply this English 1102 course to how I decide to view life; negatively or positively. The completion of this course has opened my eyes to different ways to relax and stay positive, and how this is an important aspect to finding peace, which I strive for. In my English 1102 course, I have completed assignments, activities, and class workshops that have influenced me to grow as a writer and learn every step of the writing process. I believe I have done exemplary, A work in this class because I have always completed assignments and took the extra step to learn the material and take responsibility for my learning. Throughout my portfolio, I clearly lay out the objectives of the class and how I satisfied each requirement of this course by quoting how I specifically revised my essay and primarily what I have learned from this course. Completing reading assignments, detailed note taking, and independently researching my topic of positive psychology to form my argument, confirmed how important it is to take responsibility for my learning. Without completing each assignment, I would not have learned how to create effective and appealing essays, an important requirement of this course. More importantly, I would not have been exposed to the extent of the writing process. Now, I feel much more confident about how to execute each step of the writing process in order to produce sufficient and effective essays.