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Robert J. Safuto
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Introduction: Welcome to the Beehive ......................................................... 1
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Introduction: Welcome to the Beehive
time.
careers I’ve had. I realized that I have done a lot and had a
much more diverse work experience than anyone else that I know.
me.
of each other like the LEGO blocks I played with when I was a
kid. Every time I thought I had learned all there was to know in
successful.
the major lessons that I’d learned and I settled on ten of them
business.
you? These lessons are important to you simply because they can
your own success. There’s proof of this not only in my life but
of our lives working. Shouldn’t you try to make the most of that
book and you’ll have one more important tool to help guide you
to your success.
GRADUATION DAY
school had been put behind me. In my mind, full-time work was
working since I was twelve years old in some really tough jobs
shipping company that I’d been working for over the past two
work force full time and I was working longer and longer hours.
Gone were the days when I could leave work after just five
hours. Gone were the days when things that didn’t get done on my
shift were done by people from the next one. I was no longer a
employee, work was the first priority and my bosses made sure I
knew it.
forgone conclusion.
bees. I didn’t know the lay of the land and I didn’t speak the
Does the situation sound familiar to you? Have you ever felt
like there was something more you needed to know to not only
already learned a good deal from previous jobs and have a good
when there’s real money on the line in a business and the bills
to pay are your own. It’s a tough, new world you’re in and
school phase is just one of them. Moving from the school phase
out there.
on our own and they apply to everyone who works for a living.
touch on topics that our young people will NEED to know in order
tougher. Forced into the working world at a young age and a low
may always be out of their grasp. But some high school graduates
fare much better than those with college degrees. There are
in school. I plan to pull back the curtain on the show and have
WHY WE WORK
Why do I work?
I still do the same thing for work that I’m doing right now?
In year one, those three seconds would fly by and the defense
enough time to drop back, scan the field and throw a pass. Those
important.
they are the doorway to our dream of doing what we love and
Are you in? Can you see what I’m getting at? It’s important,
really important, that you get these lessons into your brain and
start taking them to heart. The sooner you take these lessons to
heart, the sooner you can start gaining ground and living your
dreams.
is that these common-sense lessons will help you down the road
20 and she had a fresh face, a nice smile and really short hair.
She turned her head, touched her hair and replied in a very shy
Just as shy, she replied, “Well I was getting paid for it.” I
told her that it sounded like easy money to get paid for having
a haircut, but she didn’t look happy and after a short pause she
offered, “But the guy didn’t pay me. I was supposed to get
$200.”
By the look on her face and the sound of her voice I could
tell that she needed the money badly. I could also tell that she
was ashamed of being taken by a guy she had just met who seemed
fashion school in Manhattan and very new to the city. She was
dream of being a fashion designer. I gave her the job, but she
dealings.
and cheat you out of your dreams if given the chance. Sounds
Honest people get beaten all the time in business deals and
In your working life you’ll deal with businesses both big and
of. Not everyone makes the choice to treat others so badly, but
the ones who do can make your life miserable and put a serious
BUILDING TRUST
world of business. You build trust with people like you build a
life savings.
when she got her hair cut. Kelli didn’t think she needed to
gave him $20 each. We were eager and easily sold. He asked for
This type of environment favors those who would hoodwink you out
feedback for the people they do business with, the folks at eBay
people’s promises until you feel comfortable that they are the
It’s hard to know exactly when you can say that you “trust”
like you know someone, you should always err on the side of
in a business deal.
For many people, the first true “trust event” that occurs
to know that you’ve got a job, but you might not have considered
once you make the jump from student to worker bee. And whether
ASK QUESTIONS
business situation. More often than not you can detect warning
signs when you ask a few questions that your counterpart can’t
When Kelli made the deal to get her hair cut, she didn’t
think she needed to ask questions. She simply trusted that her
just don’t work that way in the world of dollars and sense.
the game of making deals. Kelli didn’t have the time to build
trust since her rent was due soon and she needed to act quickly.
Have you ever been in a job interview and had the interviewer
ask you if you had any questions? Did you ever clam up and
forget what you wanted to ask? In every interview for a job that
I’ve ever been on I’ve been asked, “Do you have any questions?”
you know, complete strangers are offering you a job and you’re
accepting because you need a job and don’t want to pass an offer
up.
the majority of your waking life and not asking a few questions.
If you’re not the type to question others, change your ways now!
getting her hair cut off. One question that comes to mind is
delivered. Kelli never did ask that question, although she did
ask how much she would be paid. It was a good start but not
Kelli’s first questions should have involved how and when she
would get paid. Hindsight tells us that she should have demanded
payment up front. After all, when the guy wouldn’t pay it wasn’t
like she could put the hair back onto her head! So if a
they know they will have to commit time and resources to prepare
for a job.
has one right answer. But in business you really want to focus
on hearing the answers that you know are wrong. There may be one
For example, you may ask a prospective employer how many weeks
something more than two weeks and anything more than two weeks
would be correct. But if you hear them say two weeks or below,
the answer to the question. If you’re not there yet the answers
few weeks in the city. She’d been hoodwinked more than once so
she was cautious about everything. Yes, she asked how and when
the job. She had learned the hard way before and lost a few
of reading this book, you’ll end up better off then she did.
ask:
These are just a few questions that you should be asking when
questions, then walk away and deal with someone else. Better to
deal with someone who’s eager and accommodating than deal with a
person that treats you like a jerk. As you move through the
questions that may seem dumb to you are worth asking. The key is
that you must feel comfortable that all your questions are
business situation.
in this book. Don’t worry, none of them are hard and all of them
bee.
questions that you didn’t ask. I want you to write down all the
questions you can think of, including ones that you didn’t ask.
This exercise will help you to think about the questions you
should be asking and break down some barriers in your mind about
questioning others.
ENGAGE COUNSEL
We’ve already established that our friend Kelli didn’t ask the
happening when she got duped by her would-be hair thief. After
all, even if she had asked the right questions her lack of
in other words, find someone who can give you solid advice.
our parents and maybe our older siblings for advice. Later in
then you have something great to fall back on. But if you’re one
of the many who takes the leap and heads to far-away places,
you’re fresh out of school the last thing you think you need to
do is ask someone for help. You just learned all you’ll need to
know, right?
bit of experience who has no agenda and can provide you with
bits of sage advice to keep you on track and away from the bad
guys who cut all your hair and stiff you on your end of the
thinking it, but the truth is that no matter who you are you can
person (or people) for the job. In order to find the right
necessary. If you’re reading this book, I’d say it’s a safe bet
begin your search. Any person providing you with counsel should
someone who has more experience than you in the areas where
you’ve just graduated college you might not get too much
valuable advice about work from your roommate who got out of
people.
If all the above are true, then engage people who are eager
Do you know any lawyers? For all the lawyer jokes that you
situation. Have you met any people recently who you like and are
job who you admire that could help you. Seek out this person who
will be your confidant and guide and they will probably end up
others come to them for advice. It makes them feel like they’re
days to assess the world around you and identify someone. Once
says no? No problem, move on and try to find someone else who’s
unless you actually spend the time to get some counsel every
using it!
Sure, I’d get paid some money for working but I wouldn’t be able
get those benefits you have to know what you want to get out of
you. When you walk into a restaurant you may want a good meal at
entertainment that you enjoy. But what about those times when
you’re looking for a job? Are you just looking for a job that
office or get three weeks vacation? Do you want to try your hand
at running your own business? What about health care and other
Knowing what you want helps you to ask the right questions.
future. You could see in the bottom line that the business
knew what I wanted to get out of the business and those ideas
few months.
The key point here is that business owners who know what they
to pull it all together to know exactly what you want. You may
be a single mom (or dad) trying to provide for your family while
to-day basis.
who can avoid a sack and make the most of his short time, you
need to handle the pressure and find a way to make the world
around you slow down just a little bit. Is that very hard to do?
you hope to get out of the situation. Once you’ve decided what
down how you plan to ensure that you get what you want out of a
show up on time for the meeting, and be very positive and very
or, at the very least, make my best attempt to move the sales
process forward.
situation. Try this for as many scenarios as you can think of.
GET IT IN WRITING
and move forward we must. These skills will inevitably lead you
deal.
And as much as we’d like to think that people are all honest and
That’s why you’ll find that the best way to protect yourself in
many people skip it because they think that it’s easier to take
service for someone and everything goes smooth on your end. You
get paid on time, you’re happy and they’re happy, end of story.
Now imagine the same scenario but your client now refuses to
pay. They may start making up reasons why you shouldn’t be paid
or that you should be paid less than what you agreed upon. You
the terms in writing you have no way of proving that fact and
lucrative. When the job was complete the developer tried every
company.
Here’s the best part, the job had already been verified onsite
and the terms, which were met completely, were in writing! The
written contract?
job was complete, and I’m sure that many of them got squeezed
pretty hard.
provide wedding photography services, the cost can run into the
side from the other doing something that can hurt the other.
pay a one-third deposit so that my wife can set aside the time
and not book any other jobs. There’s also a clause that requires
before the job is done, then get a deposit for your services. A
deal.
are set up without deposits and nearly half the time the people
people show up one hundred percent of the time. When people are
you. You should read these contracts and know what they say
evaluation and I would avoid any employer who tries to get you
add anything to the contract that has been promised but is not
type of situation and that’s just not the case. Some employers
may give you that attitude and those are the employers that
agreement?
will serve you well in business. Second, you should take some
defined service, you can probably write out a contract that will
cover most situations and leave space for the name of the person
include a few basic terms and fill out the rest as you take on
work.
to insure that they are legally binding. After all, spending the
agreements with a lawyer costs money but it will save you big-
For your next exercise I want you to get into the mindset
that you have the right (and the obligation to yourself) to put
you engaged in. You could also think of a situation where you
that you would have liked. Either way, use that situation to
agreement and write them out. Once you’ve done that, consider
ENFORCING AGREEMENTS
agreement and you do the same (which you should always do) then
jeopardy.
either some money or a service that you are owed and there’s no
men argue over which seat number was the window or the aisle. A
man had gotten on the plane first and taken the aisle seat. A
few moments later another man got on the plane and said to the
first man that he had a ticket for seat 7B, which was definitely
The first man looked him directly in the eye and insisted
that 7B was the window seat. The man with the ticket for the
aisle seat protested once and the man actually in the aisle seat
rebuked him again. Without further protest the main with the
In this situation the man who took the window seat was obviously
The key here is not to let others impose their will on you
without you having some say in the matter. Your say will involve
agreement and the employer violates the terms, then you are well
within your rights to take action. After all, you are not an
indentured servant and you should never act as if you are one.
Stand up for yourself and you’ll get what you want, rather than
The action that you should take will depend on the situation.
for all work performed and if the client fails to show up on the
day of the shoot, then the agreement states that she can keep
that deposit.
Now, she’d rather complete her services and get paid the full
amount rather than have a client who doesn’t show, but the
from wasting her time. And besides, the other person fully
appointment.
show up.
being the price of the session if the client failed to show up.
payment. Well after I had to pay back the cost of those papers
paperboy, but once I had to pay all the bills on my own I made
business person and achieve your dreams. You will also be a bit
paying more than once for services that are owed to you. All it
enforcing agreements and that you are ready to take action. It’s
important that you understand what actions you will take prior
making a deal with anyone: How will I react if the other party
people who sell to me and require feedback from others who buy
from me. Since I always provide good service, the higher number
once they’ve posted mine. Even with this policy stated, some
eBay I always wanted feedback but never did anything about it,
Since I’ve started doing this all of the people buying from
me have left feedback. These people probably would not have left
complex.
and come up with necessary action plans. Some of these plans may
The key here is that you need to know what action you will
contemplate them and then write down the answers. Here you go:
types of confrontation?
confront someone?
situations?
on.
“What counts is not necessarily the size of the dog in the fight
- it's the size of the fight in the dog.”
- DWIGHT D. EISENHOWER
Back in the 1960s the Cuban Missile Crisis had many Americans
States.
In the days that followed, the United States and Russia were
sides of the conflict and many Americans feared that the country
would go to war.
rethought his position, turned his ships back for Russia and
situation can be life and death (unless you’re dealing with the
their business.
roofers’ work!”
After a while they came out of closed doors and we were allowed
how passionate the roofers were about the fact that we might be
doing work that could mean a paycheck for one of their fellow
workers. And I remember how adamant we were about this work that
take over. To both sides the business was worth it and we both
had our legitimate reasons for standing pat. In the end the
bosses worked it out, but not before they had a chance to air
The “Zen” approach of going with the flow and avoiding conflict
Foundling Hospital.
order to persevere and get ahead. After all, our quality of life
PRINCIPLES
Know your beliefs and principles and stick by them. Not having
being asked to compromise your beliefs and fudge the numbers or,
basis to see that this type of thing does happen, and quite
have shown us that some folks in the corporate world work very
you can hear it in your boss’ voice and see it on her face that
refusing to fudge the numbers a bit would greatly upset her or,
in less diplomatic terms, she’ll can you like tuna if you don’t
help out.
and in your life. On one hand, you can help advance your career
in the short term, while on the other hand you might be taking
an action that may hurt others and you might have to pay dearly
for later.
somewhere along the way you can lose sight of what’s real and
situations like this can become like a gray area where small
NO!
your boss or inside your own head. Once you start breaking your
slope.
Think about those executives who made what they thought were
small fibs and were so happy when they got the bonus and
promotion. Now think about how they felt when their names showed
Refuse to fudge the numbers and your boss will put all kinds of
the future will hold brighter days. Never mortgage your future
COMPROMISE
can help you. Since your counselor is more experienced than you
are, he or she can help you find the right level of comfort with
You will find out that compromising your principles opens you up
to a world where you never know where you stand. On the other
hand, there are areas where you might want to give in a bit in
straightforward.
Cuba. In that case the U.S. held fast on the basic principle
strong persuasion. The result was successful for us but the U.S.
would have been well within its rights to defend itself more
forcefully.
threatened and we couldn’t ignore that, but at the same time our
working on the shower room while the roofers were given a chance
job.
probably in order.
how far they could push the envelope and get aw ay with stuff.
a soldier who had stolen a part from one of our tanks on the
Police.
To me, theft within the U.S. Army was inexcusable and should
I was ready to bring down the whole house and report the
The favors that we were being offered would more than make up
for the lost tank part and the soldier agreed to apologize to
the tank crew from whom he’d stolen the part from. So instead of
ruining the career of a young private who didn’t know better and
Ben Affleck and Matt Damon are two people who know that being
tough and sticking to your guns can pay off big time. They sold
company.
break in the film business. The film company wanted to make the
movie with two other actors in the starring roles. Ben and Matt
had the right of first refusal on the roles and they would not
let the movie go forward without being cast in the roles that
Once again, Ben and Matt stood tough and insisted that the
the story.
breakers, the script went unproduced for a year and a half until
Miramax agreed to purchase the script rights from the first film
with Ben and Matt in the starring roles and use genuine Boston-
area locations.
important for Ben and Matt, though, was the fact that they were
then seen as movie stars. In the six years since “Good Will
These are great examples, but how you learn how to be tough
relationships. When the time comes, you just need to think about
down this book and take a few moments to do some soul searching.
principle;
Take some time with this, do some soul searching and even ask
principles. The list will get larger as time goes on but for now
you should have a baseline to start from that puts the earlier
Your list may have three principles or ten to start with. The
length does not matter as much as the intent and feeling behind
the principles on the list. You don’t have to complete the list
situations that come up out of the blue and throw our best-laid
experience.
myself together and addressed the issue at hand. I’m not sure
how much time I wasted being frustrated, but it was too much.
The thing that you have to learn is that the unexpected will
occur and that you need to let it bounce right off you while you
keep moving forward. Being upset does nothing to change the new
circumstance.
everything to spoilage.
New York is a tough city and one of the reasons it’s so tough
anyone. I’m sure there were also plenty of people who were very
counterproductive.
Or how about this. Your job is moved from the United States
can be deployed all over the world if the need arises. My time
I’d like you spend time thinking about some unexpected things
that could occur and imagine how you’d deal with them. You could
you find out a new baby is on the way. There are many types of
possible events. Then think about and write down how you’d deal
predict the future but to merely get you into the mode of
surprised at the answers that you come up with and the feelings
that are associated with those answers. Put this book down until
you’re finished with the exercise and then come back and read
on.
BE DECISIVE
What will you have for dinner tonight? When will you leave for
work tomorrow morning? How will you make a living after you get
We’ll all deal with these questions and many others. We deal
routine and made in seconds, and there are some that are tough
The more ambitious you are, the more tough decisions you’ll
have to make. After I got out of the military I had some very
nothing and continue with the status quo. Another choice was to
certain job? Should you ask for a raise? Should you buy from a
because of fear. People fear that the decisions they make will
California and join the Army, many people thought it was a bad
I used the same process in that decision that I did with all
the rest. And while I was moving from decision to decision and
same old situations and complaining about the ruts they were in.
examine the business people whom you admire. Chances are these
their success.
What are the tough decisions that you have to deal with in
decision.
decision?
career.
you give it a chance you’ll find the right mix of toughness and
compromise to make things work for you. Sure, you’ll make some
philosophy.
chances and grabbed for the easy and safe B. After all, why
starting a family just like they had done. And so, for a short
educational expenses.
After all, people don’t feel good about taking risks when
world. Even if they are loaded down with debt, there are some
folks who still have the will to make risky moves and take the
achieving their dreams. Those folks are among the few but
courageous.
It’s more likely that you are like I was right after college.
certain direction.
realize that the “safe” route wasn’t the one for me. I was
Let’s stop right here and ask a question. Have you ever been
compelled to make a change in your life? Have you ever felt like
questions is yes. Reading this book may be one of the moves that
act when we feel strongly about making a change? The answer most
change equals risk and if you take a risk you just might make
considered a failure.
What is failure? I once heard that the only people who fail are
the ones who fail to try something they are compelled to do.
something new.
from a place where a steady job and certain income were highly
There were simply people who were doing their duty and
raising their families. All of this was good and noble and
Have you ever had the same feeling? Have you ever had the
feelings that many people have but few express outwardly for
very scary time, but it was also the most exciting time of my
action.
what, I was happier. You’ll be happier too when you forget the
exciting life that fulfills their dreams, and college was the
mistakes as long as you learn from them and don’t keep repeating
of maturing and finding out who you are in this life. I know
times I would say the wrong thing or lose training clients due
found that unlike the exams that we all took in high school and
Higher education simply fools us into thinking that you have one
So where did I get the guts to start taking all these chances,
you ask?
The U.S. space program during the 1960s provided me with some
could pay off. The engineers and scientists working on the space
All that I remembered from school were the stories about the
successes of putting men into space and then on the moon. School
drawing board and try again, processing what they’d learned from
them to success.
goals.
you never take a misstep? If you do, then you must realize that
perfect will not move you onward and upward in the beehive.
lesson from the space program was this: You need to calculate
your risks when going into a venture. I call this measuring your
swing.
into the first rockets that they were testing until they were
recovered successfully.
manned space flight. So yes, there were great risks but at the
the risks and deal with possible consequences before taking the
next step. Sounds a bit scary, but the important part is that in
mistakes and learn from them along with the ability to measure
their swing can take them to very high places and give them an
career fair.
life and then give you the opportunity to work on a few examples
of your own so you can ease into the whole thought process.
guitar? How would I know which guitar was right for me?
find a teacher and once found how would I know the right one to
choose?
get good at it? What if, no matter how hard I tried, I never
in me.
the guitar and many people do not get past that stage when
making decisions.
and face potential ridicule for failing. The key here is that
guitar. I was working and saved some money every week for a
How would I find a teacher and once found how would I know
the guitar.
gained comfort from the thought that everyone had to start from
seem limiting at first they are only one step in the process of
break each risk down into individual parts and address them as
And by the way, I’ve been playing guitar for sixteen years
now. I still have the first guitar I ever bought and play it
almost every day. I’d say that the investment and risk
sales firm in the world. If that’s not a risk, I don’t know what
is.
Ten years ago I didn’t know one person who had ever heard of
Dell Computer and now just about every adult person recognizes
small computer business. He worked hard to make his risk pay off
Over the past five years eBay has been constantly moving into
new business areas and developing new offerings for its growing
dividends. So in order to find out what would work, eBay CEO Meg
Whitman and her staff had to activate some ideas that seemed to
have promise but failed. The key here was that the eBay team was
first few chapters in order to move on and get the full benefit
You’ve done well to come this far and I want to make sure the
Once you’ve reviewed the first three lessons, come back and
start with the next lesson, where you’ll learn that people who
“You can have everything in life you want, if you will just help
enough other people get what they want.”
- ZIG ZIGLAR
we were eighteen years old. We’d eat pizza and just watch the
street. One Times Square staple from back then that has since
(two black and one red) around and when they’re done flipping a
player tries to select the red card. Back then this game was THE
down forty dollars and try to pick the red card, with a hundred
were working with the dealers to give the impression that the
game could easily be won. Now this game was completely illegal,
but the zeal with which the operators plied their trade was
they put on a show which gathered crowds and then those crowds
ideas.
hampered.
where so many business people, young and old, have forgotten the
kid and you wanted to stay out past a certain hour and your Mom
objections with, “But Mom, all the other kids are staying out”?
tomorrow”?
objections one by one. Most of the time the parent wins the
Somewhere along the way I lost that zest for selling and so
jobs and cars and reach college age the last thing we want to do
school.
You may get some exposure to sales in college, but then the
give the profession a bad name because they are annoying people.
to the salespeople. Many people I’ve talked to feel the same way
about sales, but they haven’t learned the simple fact that
sell would make the difference between working for someone else
and being able to work for yourself. Like many people, I came to
of management.
the morning and even harder to imagine your dreams coming true.
they are on a small scale. But when you start thinking about
LEARNING TO SELL
I needed to be one. The second step was going out and getting
still hear Zig Ziglar’s voice from his sales tapes that I bought
The next step was actually applying these methods and finding
a very good salesperson! Next, you’ll need to know how you can
offering. This is all good because there are many “real world”
them on the idea of receiving it. In this way I could have built
photo services. I’ve also done similar exercises where I’ve sat
confidence and then have other people work with you so that they
your sales skill should improve and give you a better chance at
success.
Even with good sales skills there are still some very important
aspects of selling that you will need to master. All the skills
in the world won’t help you if you don’t know what you’re
selling.
boss and at the last second before the pitch you were told that
You would probably have a very rough time making the case.
you’ll also need to know any issues that aren’t directly related
to what you’re proposing but might affect the folks who agree to
department you need to know how that proposal might affect other
departments.
your homework, the better equipped you will be to deal with the
Yes, people will ask questions. Some will ask very few
questions and others will ask a lot of them. Either way, you
highly likely that almost everyone you sell to will have some
about buying what you’re selling. Objections don’t mean that you
can’t sell to the person; they just mean that you need to
rebuttals.
sale. To close the sale you simply need to ask for the sale.
pitching an idea, you might summarize your key points and state
the chief reasons why you think the idea will be successful. If
you’re selling a product you might say something like, “So how
One word to the wise is not to try to close the sale too
but you’ll learn from those mistakes. Whatever you do, don’t
DELIVERING
begins.
you’ve sold your boss on a new idea, then you’ve got to work to
then you need to deliver a product that does just what you said
it would do. Failing to deliver will hurt you in the long run,
as you might fool someone once but they will rarely allow you to
promises.
feels good to admit when you’re wrong but it’s better to swallow
With this approach people will respect you and just may give
every so often to keep your sales skills sharp. Write down three
idea that you want to sell. Write down a few things about the
that I’m trying to sell? Who am I trying to sell to? What will
proposal?
nothing about what you’re selling. Tell the whole story and try
objections and how you’ll try to close the sale. This type of
real situations.
PERSISTENCE
Even with the preparations that you’ll make for selling, you
will still hear the word “no” from people. I’ve heard a lot of
have to be persistent.
You may hear a dozen no’s or even a hundred no’s before you
hear the word “yes.” This will challenge your ability to deal
selling their ideas. Remember, the word “no” doesn’t mean that
have the same vision that you have. You must be persistent and
power through. If you quit after just a few no’s then you’ll
Ben Affleck and Matt Damon heard plenty of no’s when trying
to sell their script for the film “Good Will Hunting” but they
the ability to keep going and try new things even after my
Their eyes light up, they start to talk a bit faster and get
Take this moment and start writing down some things that you
love and enjoy. Imagine how you would sell each one as an idea
things happen. The harder you work at it, the more positive
three years Myles has turned his passion for custom cars into a
attention.
Your goals may be more modest or they may be even more grand
educated and strictly following the lead of this book. Bad days,
weeks and even months will pop up when you just can’t seem to do
with pitfalls. That’s why I need you to read on and find out why
They quit on the one yard line. They give up at the last minute
- H ROSS PEROT
Jets lost a lot more than they won, but no matter what the score
of the game I would always stay tuned for the two-minute warning
but they were also very inspirational. You got the feeling that
fantastic finishes, you too need to give it your best shot even
when the odds are against you. Many people call this having
“heart.” Whatever you call it, it’s essential for success in the
world of business.
Copyright 2004, Robert J. Safuto. All rights reserved. 101
DEALING WITH ADVERSITY
It’s easy to feel good and face the world when things are
going great. When things start to turn for the worse, that’s
ideas traverse rough ground at the start and then get better
suddenly have a major setback and you’ve got to start all over
again.
been very realistic but it would have been something. Just once
are against you and you’ll need guts and strength to make a
hits the rocky ground that I spoke of earlier. Do you sulk and
You don’t have to write anything down yet but I’d like you to
being criticized, Enron’s stock price was high and this made
less than a dollar a share from over $70 a year earlier. The
schemes, including the CEO and CFO of the company, insisted that
they realized they could not grow the company by honest means
and then later when they were caught lying to the business
HONESTY
with tough times. You have to be honest with yourself and you
Enron, one of its early problems was the fact that the company
one and although there would have been criticism and doubt for
the new plans, in the long run the company would have probably
been saved. Enron’s leaders didn’t have the heart to make the
dishonest. Had these folks been honest, there may have been more
than a few employees with the heart to step up and pitch in with
live with this fear then we’re building our own walls between us
FRAME OF REFERENCE
shipping company. The hours were long and the job was more about
about to quit due to the heavy workload and stress of the job.
My boss, a guy named Doug Hartman, was a good person and I felt
“Do what you feel is right for you because this life is your
own. But do yourself a favor and think for a second about how
That’s a bad way to go. Why not give it a little bit more time
and try to turn things around? Then you can go out knowing that
feeling like I could handle any tough times ahead. Without that
of reference.
later time.
hurdle problems, the more heart you will have for dealing with
Remember, you can be humbled in this life and more than likely
you will face a few tough situations as you make your way. You
throughout the day and night. While many saw no point to this
After a few days there were some people who wanted nothing
more than to get out of there. But where would these people go?
to their left and right to see the others persevering with them.
They had lost the heart needed to go further and would never
know how far they could have gone. You see, in business and in
numerous times, but they couldn’t have been tested any more than
to pour down. Everyone was soaking wet. After the rain stopped
was drying out but my feet and back were beginning to ache. By
the ten-mile point I was hurting pretty bad. We would stop every
few miles but I was now unable to remove my boots since I feared
that my feet would swell and I wouldn’t be able to get the boots
back on. A truck drove up and down the line to pick up soldiers
quitting meant going through this all over again. I thought back
now?
that truck. I was taking the hard road, but often the hard road
like I could do anything and that’s the way you need to feel to
be successful.
Have you ever had a moment in your life where you wanted to
to bet that the answer is yes. We’ve all had moments like that.
learned those early lessons. I did learn those early lessons and
you shouldn’t be afraid to learn them too. The going will get
forward in response.
The executives at Enron took the road that afforded them the
have to put in the time and the sweat like I did on that road
march. The time and the sweat will pay off if you stay the
hours after the terrorist attacks on Sept. 11, 2001. The city of
New York was gripped in fear with thousands dead and massive
Cross and dozens of other agencies. All the while, order was
kept in the city even though most police were assigned to the
millions of people knew that all was not lost and immediately
great cities.
education but rather his experience running the city and ability
Henry Ford once said, “Obstacles are those frightful things you
see when you take your eyes off your goal.” The rewards that you
from being a civilian with all the say over my time to being a
Sergeants.
The first few days of this training were some of the toughest
officer and those thoughts helped me to get through OCS and earn
place. You will have days when you will be working hard and
low. You may think about giving up. It’s during those moments
that you need to stop and think about the overall goal and also
Ponder these thoughts for a few moments and then write down
all the reasons why you initially set out to achieve your goal.
Take a few more moments to ponder these reasons and then ask
can teach it. Even this book can’t give you a true idea of the
education. Heart doesn’t find its way onto the evaluation forms
never fit into the system in the first place. And since this is
it.
I do believe that you can develop heart like one develops any
even know it. I wanted something (money for school) bad enough
The same goes for when I was marching those 15 miles in the
and surer of myself than the last time. I’ve slowly built on my
same.
path of least resistance may get you further ahead in the short
Somewhere along the line you will run into an obstacle that
you must go through. When that time comes you need to be ready
for it. Take some time to ponder this issue. Do you look for the
with yourself and decide how you will conduct yourself from this
I’d like you to take some time to think of situations where you
your reaction. Write down your reaction as well. You should have
done differently.
with this exercise, come back to the book and read on.
to you now. Remember that tests of your heart in this life won’t
happen just once, ten times or even a hundred times. There may
greater goal. Don’t fret because you can do it. In order to have
Lesson Four? Every time I went back to Times Square I would see
them running the same con in the same spot. After all those
years I figured that they must have been successful since the
average small business startup in New York City lasts for less
dealer and the patsy who would play as a show for the crowd,
make a signal and the dealer would scrap the game immediately
game. Even the dealer and the patsy could not do it alone
police force use some smart teamwork of their own to rid the
always a bigger fish that can come along and swallow you up.
succeed.
once said, “Surround yourself with partners who are better than
support team.
of a team.
and his kitchen staff. Lucky for me, the chef was first-rate and
Next, I looked at the bar staff and realized that they were
very weak and that we needed a newer and more motivated bar
team.
crew and started work on finding a new group for that effort. I
personnel.
my head waiter, who had a lot more style then I did. By focusing
chance of success.
read on.
time if I’d been smart enough to use some of the folks that I
successful.
Maybe that’s why many small businesses fail within the first
tight and you need to make your dollars go far. You have to be
and fully respect the enormity of the task of starting your own
she should account for her own money but hire an accountant to
insure that she was in compliance with the tax laws and
make sure that she can focus on the photography and the
shoot.
still difficult but it’s manageable and very, very rewarding for
her.
make a good living working from their food carts but they
their food items and dry goods. They have storage spaces nearby
where they place their carts overnight and they have repair
shops where they take the carts for service. All of this allows
out how to make the city a safer place. He would consult with
Giuliani knew the value in having the best people advising him
The mayor’s use of a team paid off nicely for the city of New
if you’re smart and resourceful. I’ve seen both good and bad
gives them. I know I’ve felt much more empowered and motivated
favor of completing big tasks with minimum help so they can take
folks are just trying to make sure they get credit and have more
office may seem achievable in the short run, but in the long run
myself.
marathon, not a sprint, and you can’t win a thing if you burn
decided that she would keep track of all her income and
expenses.
identified that my wife needed help with marketing and Web site
construction and maintenance. I had some free time and the right
her team, my wife was ready to move to the next step in her
business life.
want to try to gather where the strengths are among your co-
up the chain. That doesn’t matter a bit. Know the strengths and
when a situation comes your way that could leave you hanging out
to dry.
idea that you are working on. Write down the details of the
skill areas and write them down. For each area of skill, notate
Isolate the areas where you are weak. Figure out which of the
weak areas you can learn in short order. This exercise should
help to show you what you do well and where you need assistance.
can help me? Are these people in any way available? If you have
Once your ideal team is identified, you then have to set out to
bring the right people together. This may be the hardest part of
teamwork. Many people fall into the trap of picking team members
just to fill the roster and say your team is complete. This
Use some very basic rules when assembling your team and
who you can get along with. Choose people who have the skills
that you really need. Choose people who are motivated and want
If you’re thinking that finding people who meet all the above
recommend those folks that you might not know already. And if
you make a mistake and pick a poor team member, don’t hesitate
to find someone who better suits your needs. You don’t want a
weak link in your team to bring you (and your dreams) crashing
to the ground.
team. You manage the team in order to make sure that you’re
getting what you want out of the situation. Knowing what you
MAKING IT WORK
likely to put them in the spot that helps you the most. This
more likely to get that respect back and that leads to strong
system where people feel like they count, then your team members
morning and told me, “You’ve got to use your team.” I took those
the Florida Marlins shocked the New York Yankees to win the
World Series. The Yankee team was stacked with stars but was no
match for a solid and cohesive unit of hungry and not very well-
known players.
make great things happen. Manage your team well and you can make
everything yourself.
far. It’s critical that you grasp the previous lessons before
your progress. Once you finish your review you can read a lot
- SOCRATES
something that you did every so often but not all the time. I
right direction.
living my life and I don’t have time to stop and evaluate every
about the rookie NFL quarterback feeling rushed with only three
caught up and don’t evaluate the BIG things. I’m sure you’ve
heard someone say, “so and so has lost sight of the big
picture…”
longer to work on. It’s a difficult task, but only if you rarely
evaluation, then anyone can. Besides, regular folks like you and
CHANGE OR LOSE
maintenance costs were the norm from the big U.S. automakers.
were getting fed up. So while the big U.S. automakers were
trickle turned into a flood and within a few years the big five
recover from their sales slump, but the damage had been done.
The U.S auto industry learned the hard way that not taking
the time and spending the money to evaluate things is a huge and
business.
you will be lost. Still, many folks don’t take the time to
CONSCIOUS EVALUATION
now I’m evaluating whether this sentence I’m writing makes sense
whether or not to keep reading or put this book down. All these
tasks and much evaluation can fall into the unconscious realm.
business there are many ways that the forces of the world can
act upon you and cause bad things to happen. The big U.S.
market forces of the auto industry acted upon them and they lost
market share.
year and get to spend some time in their work environment. For
into autopilot mode. I’ve been there myself and that’s why I
Are you on autopilot in your business life? When was the last
been skewed.
myself.
pocketbook.
After some inquiries I found out that the clients had been
happy with my service and the results initially but then became
them excited about the routine. Like the big U.S. automakers, I
had assumed that my clients would accept what I gave them and I
results I felt like I had earned that “A.” I didn’t learn about
life and cash flow I gave the concept a good hard look.
Are you focusing on the big picture all the time in your
EVALUATE EVERYTHING
small deal. You evaluate the things that you are choosing to do
fall into, but luckily it’s also easy to get out of that trap.
You can stop at any point in the process and evaluate your
current situation.
My life is…
My career is…
My family is…
My finances are…
business?
Ask yourself these questions and as many others that you can
think of. You should keep asking questions until you feel like
taken. The big U.S. automakers had to act in the 1980s or they
questions and answers. The second part deals with action. The
evaluation.
The cycle goes like this: Evaluate, take action and evaluate
again. It may sound like you’re going round and round but you’ll
The moves paid off and I was soon able to get and, more
five job.
Armed with those answers, I want you to spend some time thinking
me.
business?
Action: Seek out more knowledge by reading a new book each month
issues. This approach will help get you used to the cycles of
month from this point forward. Identify areas for evaluation and
choosing.
adjusting you’ll notice that your goals will always seem more
attainable. You will know where you stand and you will have the
your closet. You know that the tiger has to go if you want to
feel safe. You figure if you keep the door closed maybe the
tiger will leave your house on its own. Facing the tiger is
given that it will change your life in a very positive way and
- HENRY FORD
education.”
mature yet. I knew very little about what was in store for me in
Like many young people I thought that I knew it all and was
freedom, but then I hit a hard wall. You see, the knowledge I
self-learning.
college. One positive note that helped me move forward was the
knowledge you gained five or ten years ago? Are you actively
for continued learning, your business skills will erode and your
If you take a look at the events in this world over the last ten
the planet.
In 1991 the Internet was something that was only used by the
know how to type and file, but how to use Microsoft Word,
two. This expectation is all fine and dandy for someone who’s
been to school in the last few years, but what about the people
who was resting on their laurels thinking that they could coast
when their boss let them know that they were being replaced by a
newer model that never takes a coffee break or has to use the
restroom.
skills? Or any other skill, for that matter? The masters of any
The process of going through high school and college with big
Concept.”
After all, you’ll spend much more time out of school than in it.
chop wood and carry water. After enlightenment, chop wood and
I could beat you over the head all day with quotes about the
sense. But how many people stay on course and follow through on
feel like you’ve graduated then you’ve got some work to do. Even
If you’re like most people you lead a busy life. So you might
have some objections like, “But I’ve got to work and raise a
sense for dinner and tell you that like anything else, you need
to make time for learning. Think about it. We make time for so
family, etc. Now some of that time is very well-spent and some
it. Take a look at kids playing and you can see them using their
make time for learning. All successful people make that time and
to make sure that you have more time for learning. Of course,
Take a few moments to think about how you use your time.
Write down a time overview of the last few days of your life.
spend commuting to work? How much time are you spending with
sleeping a night?
when you can afford to make time for learning. You might watch a
little less TV. You could wake up half an hour earlier. You can
time to mapping out how you use your time and you’ll have a much
no matter what your goals in business are. These are areas that
areas.
The most important general knowledge areas are the ones that
Management of people
Management of finances
Computer skills
Customer service
time you’ve been spending in trying to gain the skills that you
you must consider these skills in your action plan for continued
learning.
business you’re in, but the specific knowledge areas will make
learning process.
CULTURE OF LEARNING
When you’re learning new things it’s a fact that the process
hard for most people to forego a paycheck for a few months while
More than likely you’ll need to learn on the fly and you’ll
good news is that you can do it! I’ve been involved in six very
learned to play the guitar and build Web sites. I learned all
If you ask me how I did it I can tell you simply that you
competitors.
their business.
approach has been a major factor in GE’s growth and success over
working on many jobs during school but this was like a master
You need to seek out knowledge wherever you can find it. All
take the time and the effort to go out and find it.
weekly maintenance day was not only about insuring that our
there are hundreds more. Given the way I saw the culture of
situation is like now you always have the time to decide how you
can give is first and foremost to make every part of your life
about learning.
master new concepts. I recommend that you take the same approach
life.
You should seek out the most relevant and available sources
surrounding yourself with people who know more than you do and
employees or simply people who share the same goals as you do.
successful in business.
everyday life has a way of nudging its way into our best-laid
you might be the one who ends up laid off (or downsized) and in
going well but you feel like you want to expand your horizons.
educating yourself.
First, you need to decide on the areas that you feel need
you need to teach yourself or work with others who will teach
you.
mine them for all they’re worth. You just have to take the time
to seek out knowledge. You can’t take for granted that knowledge
has an open mind, one learning experience will lead you to the
next one. I’ve also learned that you can’t learn everything at
your stronger areas of knowledge until you learn what you need
When I decided to make the move from the military world back
learning.
Internet.
military.
of computer technology.
do.
try to find out more about what they did for their clients.
as a technology consultant?”
This whole process took place over the two months before and
well-respected firm.
action plan, the results that I achieved might not have been
Here’s the big question for you. Do you think that your
have success.
used to. That’s why you’ll need to follow the next tenet of my
- ROBERT J. SAFUTO
Back around the time I was searching out a new direction after
college I took the time to read a few books about management and
could apply.
was the directive to “Be Proactive.” I had never even heard the
an exam, at which point I would cram for two days before the
dump so I could focus on the next class with an exam coming up.
It would get pretty rough around final exam time when I’d
usually have back-to-back tests. I’d usually end up with B’s and
an occasional A grade.
While all this was going on I don’t think I was learning the
brain dump nightly and start fresh in the morning like I did
unforeseen issues.
stay until I tracked the package down and gave the customer an
figure out a way to keep the packages moving and get the belt
plan something out and prepare for all the actions necessary to
mean.
inevitably she ends up cramming all the diet and exercise into a
short period just before the wedding so she can fit into her
into two months throws off her equilibrium and makes the poor
bride miserable. This misery causes the bride to react and eat
like crazy when the frustration peaks. I saw this scenario more
that life can throw at you, then you’re probably reacting rather
than anticipating.
anticipate!
for each opponent and easily beat them every time he stepped
into the ring. Mike had this great knack for eyeing his opponent
serious disadvantage.
opponent to the punch, Tyson was the slow fighter who ended up
shipping manager. When things got really bad I sought out the
it a shot since I needed help badly. What I found was that the
out the door so their employees could take the following Monday
career.
environment?
knowing your business inside and out. This knowledge not only
anticipation.
sometimes there are folks who won’t be pleased know matter how
overall situation.
why they were dissatisfied and then find a way to address the
quieter atmosphere.
and delivering food made sense. I also dimmed the lighting and
feeling.
things you can get to know your business quickly and stay on top
my business?
business?
answers right away, you should take the time to investigate this
PLANNING TO WIN
more time out of your day. Planning takes time out of actually
Even if you are not a natural planner you must take the time
successful business people are the ones who learn that taking
the time to plan can make all the difference in a tough business
situation.
take a moment right now. Close your eyes and think of all the
little things taking time away from you on a daily basis. Think
Now for each one of those things think about how you could
anticipate them. Think about how and why these events occur. For
each event, think of one thing you can do to anticipate and deal
with it.
off situations that would otherwise take time away from you. By
doing this you’ll be using up some time in the short run but
long run.
handling all sorts of situations. They are the folks who take
and get stumped by tough situations. They are the ones who have
football team has a game plan that they follow. The game plan
strengths and weaknesses. The game plan also takes into account
The abilities of both sides are fed into the game plan. The
weather outlook may feed into the plan as well. The coach may
the other coach to see how that person reacts in different game
about the game, the teams and the forces that can create
situations are fed into the game plan. A strong game plan can
plan lays out the major tasks, which are then broken out into
smaller sub-tasks.
of time each task will take and think about potential pitfalls.
engagement offers.
Say you take an hour at the end of each day to plan for the
at that lost ten percent. But the ten percent is not really
That time you spend planning at the end of each day could
off.
planning. Think about the top five events that take time away
write out how and why they occur. Then follow that with some
over time. Planning takes time but it’s the key input to
to anticipate a thing!
problems.
factors down into two categories: Forces that are under our
control (inside the circle) and forces that are out of our
the circle. These are the things that we should plan for but
can’t control.
turn helped us decide how and where we would move our forces.
I’m sure that you could come up with a number of ways that
the weather can affect your business. And even though the effect
The simple rule of thumb for dealing with the forces like
weather that are outside the circle is to plan but not dwell. As
I should have spent my time thinking and planning for the next
First, know the force. Second, know as much about how it can
best information available and the forces that you can control.
control of the forces inside the circle. The forces inside the
circle are under your control and you should spend the lion’s
share of your time planning so that these forces can work for
you.
The forces that are under your control involve the quality of
the product or service that you deliver. They involve how you
what you create. No matter what your business is, you must
year and past experience. This was a factor that was outside the
circle.
came to know very quickly that even on slow days things wouldn’t
run very well if the team didn’t perform. I had some rough days
planning around the team and spend less time worrying if people
control? Do you know all the forces within your control that
questions.
I want you to take the time right now to think about your
business and list the major factors that are inside and outside
can have on each of these factors. If you can’t have any effect
you’ll know where you need to focus your efforts and you’ll be
planning.
For time:
For money:
For people:
For technology:
over many other folks who are neglecting to take the time to
plan. But planning isn’t foolproof and it isn’t the end of the
process. That’s why you need to make sure that you follow up
but it’s not always apparent to people that they should pull the
trigger and get something done. How many times have you heard or
Everyone does that some time or another. Some people skip the
action step all the time and they’re left wanting. Some people
tank platoon leader in the U.S. Army. We would spend hours every
avoided.
there will always be events that you have to react to, but if
for pitfalls and taking action, then you will be way ahead of
the game.
Talkers make big plans and are always preparing for their next
action. Doers always take their plans to the action step and
deal with the results one way or the other. Talkers never have
folks who act on their plans. Doers handle the results and make
action. Over the years, I’ve been lucky enough to recognize the
world of business.
take place and improve the workplace. Months passed, nothing was
figure out why you held off on taking action. Did you talk about
your plans to others? If you did talk about the plan, did you
instead of a talker.
forward.
the knowledge that you’ve gained. Make sure that you take the
will not have a major impact unless you’ve truly grasped the
- RICHARD BACH
know too well, the past cannot be changed. We can only change
discharged from the Army. I had taken a job working for a very
you set out to do. People like you are in short supply.” I
thought about what she said later and realized that it was true.
Because her words rang true I knew I was destined for better
things.
Lesson Ten is the lesson on which all the other lessons are
EGO
I want you to say the following statement out loud. I can only
Your ego is that little voice that pops into your head any
challenging. Left unchecked, our ego will run roughshod over the
best of our plans and greatly limit our potential. The ego tells
long. The ego convinces us that our ideas are ordinary and our
Our potential is limited and one day bleeds into the next.
Imagine a prizefighter who can’t answer the bell for the next
round of a fight. When the ego has taken over, a person is not
The fact that you’ve gotten this far in the book tells me
mean there aren’t many more obstacles to overcome. The doubt and
so long to learn. People will laugh because I’m not good at it.
The ego was talking to me big time and running the show. Somehow
I mustered the will to get started with guitar lessons and I’ve
of my belief issues.
was very scary and I didn’t think I’d make it. I thought about
and continue to develop it every day for the rest of your life.
done so.
to act on. Make a list of all the things that you can think of.
Then select the top five most important goals in the list. Some
Whatever your choices are, they’re your goals and they’re very
important to you.
Now that you’ve chosen your top five unachieved goals I want
each one: Why haven’t I achieved this goal yet? After you’ve
written that out, I’d like you to write down the answer to this
goals has to do with doubt or fear, then you have some personal
these goals, then you have belief issues even if fear or doubts
really need this extra money. But you haven’t thought about or
made any serious attempt to get a raise for months now even
You may say that you have no fear of making more money, nor
do you have doubt that you need to make more money. So why
haven’t you been taking steps to make more money? The reason is
that you don’t fear the goal itself, but you fear the steps that
those who don’t is this: People who achieve their goals find a
themselves.
book.
like a kid who’s learned that they’ve got a snow day because
every second that you step forward in this process is one step
right? Wrong!
Too often I’ve seen my own (and other people’s) hopes dashed
set yourself up for success by setting goals that are, first and
shooting for the moon, but it does mean that you should consider
would come in and state that their goal would be to lose thirty
ill-conceived program and after only the first week and two
starters you can talk about them with your counselor. Do you
an astronaut, you might want to consult the NASA Web site to get
morning in his dorm room and say, “I want to be the CEO of the
of the month.”
couple of systems, then later move into a small office and build
the company one step at a time. This approach helps us build our
ourselves.
Let’s stop for a short time here and take a look back at
those five real important goals that you chose in the last
you can accomplish sooner and moving toward the more complex
goals that will take longer. The more you break a larger goal
down into intermediate goals, the better you will feel about the
the vehicle worked from top to bottom and I felt very confident
in pretty good shape, with some goals identified and a good idea
about how to make those goals seem more attainable. There is one
The pitfall goes like this: You set goals for yourself but
more money. I’d see other delivery boys with baskets full of
papers, a lot more papers than I had, and I got very frustrated,
on my route.
and after a few weeks we had more than doubled that number to
down the street and noticed that they were hosting over a
goals based on someone else, then you always feel like you’re
failing. People who’ve moved to the next level and have strong
YOURSELF.
Have you ever set goals for yourself and then gotten
you wanted to be? I think that everyone does this at some point
In the gym people say, “I’m not as slim and toned as she is
work they say, “He just got his second promotion since I’ve been
say, “She’s in the best sorority on campus and has a GPA one
point higher than mine. I can never compete with that.” This
your belief in self and give you an unclear picture of YOUR true
progress. The main reason why this is the case is the fact that
Let’s take the slim woman in the gym, for example. When the
woman and gets frustrated, there are a load of things that she
Maybe the woman who looks more fit uses drugs or other
success would be better off spending her time refining her own
business plan and not worry about how her competitor did this
week. Remember, YOUR GOAL IS TO MAKE YOU BETTER, and not try to
it’s a function of the ego involved here. Our ego does its best
others are doing with regards to your progress. These are your
ENVIRONMENT
closest to them.
adventurous goals. Mom and Dad didn’t mean me any harm, but in
other down to the point where there would be fistfights over the
group with that attitude but I’d grown up with these people and
myself.
certainly drag you down, too. Most of us don’t even realize how
the people who are always complaining. Look for those who yell
and berate people while doing their business. Watch out for
folks who put down your ideas without any rational reason for
doing so. These are the people who are eroding your confidence
foster belief in myself? Ask the question three times and each
words “my” and “environment”: work, home and social. Write down
the areas where you answered “No” to the above question. You’ll
feel less than you are. How do feel when you’re in this
this way? Focus on these questions and put the answers down on
paper. Our feelings always seem so much more real when we see
them in print.
I’m willing to bet that this exercise brings out some strong
emotions. Keep those emotions with you because you’ll turn them
needs to be.
negative moments.
Your belief allies are people who make you feel strong and
confident, while your belief enemies are people who tear you
down and make you feel helpless. You’ll get the best results for
life. Don’t worry, I wouldn’t expect you to just up and run from
all the people who give you negative feelings. And while you may
in your mind. Now that you’ve identified your belief enemies you
can place your mind on guard and tell yourself to disregard the
negative vibe of those who make you feel bad. In the meantime,
you can also tell yourself to pay more attention to your belief
a belief enemy doesn’t mean that they are your enemy in life. It
does mean that they don’t share the same vision that you have
belief enemy, but you don’t allow them to influence your belief
you’ve got a plan for success and can’t afford any freeloaders
Surround yourself with people who make you feel better about
yourself.
After all, there are some people out there who may have no
belief allies to start with. That’s okay because I’ve been there
and I’m here to tell you that you can make it happen even if
found that person yet, it’s OK. It’s not how fast you find your
counselor; it’s having the right person that counts. Belief ally
is only one role that your counselor will take on but it’s
the lookout for your allies. In this case, the famous quote
look at your church or any other place where you interact with
people. These people could be all around you right now. Think of
the people in your life who make you feel good about your
A light bulb may have popped into your head because you
realized that there are some belief allies that you’d originally
Remember, seek and ye shall find. But rather then just dumping
you off there I’ll provide you with an exercise that can help
person has and even write down some things that they might tell
you when you come to them with a new idea, plan or dream.
criteria? Write down all the names that you come up with. If you
you have one name or twenty on the list you should still
where you could go and what you could do to bring these types of
that new belief allies can show up anywhere and at any time,
because they can. If you keep the set criteria in mind you’ll
know when someone fits the bill. Mark my words, once you
You’ve done a lot of work so far while reading this book. You
forth in it. Do the exercises again and see how you feel. I’ll
bet that you feel stronger the second time around. Read the
chapter a third time if you like. It can only help. Once you’ve
lessons in this book, fear can still hold you back. It’s that
strong.
that all children have. I was afraid of the dark. I was afraid
heartily assisted by the ego and people never naturally grow out
of them.
late teens and early twenties I could feel myself being pulled
Have you ever felt like this? Have you ever been driven by
fear.
because they fear losing their jobs and their status in the
any balance in their lives. All the while they are being drawn
away from the things that are right for them in this life.
you’re not careful, fear can and will hold you back. Fear will
have you turn to decisions like taking a job you know is wrong
for you just to please others. Fear will prevent you from
Fear will prevent you from striking out on your own to start a
business.
How has fear held you back in business? Think about it.
All this talk about fear can make things sound pretty dismal.
gotten this far in the book you’ve achieved a lot and you’re
life. They continue to take place because fear never really goes
my whole life had been decided and that really depressed me.
These options would include a different path than the one that I
You can use the same techniques I’ve used to beat the fears
and less of my time worrying about what other people wanted from
about new career choices. For you, this means starting to take
personal control over your life situation and making your own
choices. The things that everyone else wants you to do are not
Many people might not consider this step a big deal, but any
state.
step for you is to confront the fear that is holding you back
your life? These are situations where people must confront some
death. These are moments where big steps are taken and important
will tell you how relieved and excited they were after facing
these fears.
forever. It just means that the fear has been defeated for the
moment. You see, the same fears are likely to come back again,
but your knowledge of beating fear in the past will propel you
the next time around and the time after that. The more you
future.
your own timeline. Only you can have a true understanding of how
you are feeling about a certain situation. Now go out and face
the world, practice these lessons and watch as a whole new world
more.
My hope is that this book has left you wanting more. If this
book has left you wanting more then I feel like I’ve done my
job. This book is not intended to be the last book you read
ten lessons presented here are very important, but there are
many more lessons that you will need to learn. You have to start
this book again from the start. I’m a very strong believer in
success in business. In life you can never get too much of the
basics. The basic things are the ones that you fall back on when
up this book whenever you get into a rut and want to break out
of that rut.
of the books on this list. Somewhere along the way I’m sure that
dreams.
I wish you the best in your quest and hope to meet you sometime
soon.
Robert J. Safuto
August 2004
fourteen years.
The Road Less Traveled. Peck, Dr. M. Scott. Simon & Schuster,
1978.
Schuster, 1992.
The Winner Within: A Life Plan For Team Players. Riley, Pat.
Putnam, 1993.
1968.
Press, 2000.
First Break All The Rules. Buckingham, Marcus and Coffman, Curt.