Jabba Models

Helpful hints and how-to's to aid even the most virgin in the art of lovemaking.
model building Tools of the trade and detailed coloured photographs! From opening the box to completion of a Republic Star Destroyer!
Jabbas Guide to Building Stuff
1
indelible, inconceivable, impromptu, algamation of omnipotence
Table de Contents
Introduction Tools of the trade Wet sticky coloured stuff The Destroyer project "Typos are very important to all written form. It gives the reader something to look for so they aren't distracted by the total lack of content in your writing." - Randy K. Milholland
parts............................................................... assembly........................................................ primer coat.................................................... paint by numbers.......................................... drybrushing................................................... inking............................................................ masking the stripes....................................... engine blast................................................... transfers........................................................ inking detail.................................................. final assembly...............................................
page thrice 4 XI 14
15 16 23 27 32 33 34 37 40 41 45
Conclusion
forty-six
WARNING!!!
All statements, comments and meanderings located within this document are the sole opinion of the author and his imaginary friend God. The publisher of this manual assumes no resoncibility for the following injury's that could occur if you actually do what this book says to do. 1. Damnation 2. Loss of life or limb. 3. Appearance of marks on the penis. 4. Idea that you are an interesting person. In addition to these stipulations the distributor of this manual would like to urge you to not read this. Much time has been spent to make this book and we feel the most opportune waste of time would be to insist that nobody actually use this. Contained inside these pages are the divine occult practices of the Daemon Prince. If you sniff glue remember that paint thinner it 5x as powerful and makes a great muscle relaxant. Do not smoke when sniffing inhalants, combustion may occur. If you run out of thinner and need a high, go to Wal Mart and buy computer duster. Do not hold can upside down when inhaling. Do not eat this book. In the even of a water landing this book will most likely stand on your shoulders to get air while you squirm for breath. Caution; this book may get hot if left on for prolonged periods. Never place this book next to a bible. If Bob Dole comes over to your flat, hit him in the head and shove this book up his ass. He will turn into a bionic superman who could kill Chuck Norris. If your girlfriend starts whining about how much time you spend pursuing other women, smack her on the ass and remind her who pays the bills. Do not shove any modeling tool up your own ass. Other asses are fine. Remember to take a daily dose of anthrax to protect against the hoards of terrorist who seek the knowledge of this book. Ingredients, aged cayenne red peppers, vinegar, water, salt, ground cumin, natural lime flavor, garlic powder. Do not purchase this book if the clear overwrap has been removed or damaged. Eat more carrots. Don't forget mother's day. Xacto knifes are sharp and should be used to stab assailants. Regularly exercise at the gym 3 times a week. Sleep well. If you are a senior citizen or permanently disabled and seeking personal property tax relief, go fuck yourself because you are already a drain upon society. A pin-vice may be used to drill small holes in bathroom stalls. Do not pee on the model while the paint is wet. If the model spontaneously combust throw women and children on the pyre to escape the evils of Jesus. Should you being to feel light headed or dizzy while masturbating, lessen the noose. If your boss asks you how your day is going, be sure to let him know the truth of the hell which is of his design, he could die at any moment without this knowledge. Buy more condoms for party balloons at your nieces and nephews birthday parties. Pay a hooker to eat something out your ass. If you accidently stab or slice yourself open while reading this and building the model at the same time, you are an idiot. If you cut off a finger or other small member, just remember that SuperGlue works as a band-aid. Be wary of men without penises. Always wash your hands after masturbating your pet. If asked about the whereabout of Bobby Fisher, run. In the event of George Lucas Ninjas showing up to charge royalties for the ownership of a Star Wars model just ask them if a turbo laser is more powerful than a phaser blast. If you see George Lucas, punch him in the face then thank him for his contribution to the motion picture industry. Then ask if you can borrow two hundred million to make episode 7. If you accidentally run over a jew, mail him to Steven Spielberg. Always question a cops actions, remember they lower ticket fines for those who are flippant and subversive. If you see Dave Matthews, punch him in the face. Remember that having sex with a minor is illegal, but it's not illegal to think about them while you jerk off. Quitting smoking now greatly reduces serious risks to your health and penis. Watching another male ruff the suspect is only gay if you finger your ass while watching. Women have a heart three times the size of a mans, and no brain. Only have sex with another man if it will get you into a girls pants, otherwise you're Sean Penn. George Walker Bush is a fuckhead. Wait forty five minutes after eating before getting into a pool of children. Always say thank-you. Flicking boogers at passing cars is fun. Remember that each person you cut off and the motorists honks his horn, an angle gets it's wings. Do not play music at excessive volume as it may damage your ears, unless you are black and would be better off dumb and def. When in a foreign country pretend to be Canadian and hate America too, unless you are in Canada, then just make fun of the way they talk. Always measure the penis from the nuts. If you accidently glue your fingers together, carefully cut them apart with an x-acto knife. If you are too scared to attempt that, use a hatchet. Secure all pieces to the table to prevent them from crushing you in the event of heavy seas. If you fall asleep and awake with your face glued to the model, do not panic. Carefully get to a camera, take a photo and mail it to me so that I can paste it on the net under the dumbass of the year google search. If someone makes fun of you for building models and not getting laid, ask them if they've seen the tools required to do such deatiled work, then when he is looking at the files smash him in the head with a hammer. Cut his body into bite size pieces and take several trips to the petting zoo where the animals can deal with him. Don't kiss your sister on the mouth, unless she is really hot and nobody is looking. Stare directly at the sun. Donate yellow snow. Drinking and reading this could be hazardous to your health. Do not operate heavy machinery while reading. Always remember to use the buddy system, if you get separated from you buddy, STAY PUT! Do not feed the bears unless they say "heeey bo-bo!" Monkeys throw feces. It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. Please adjust the receiver angle to improve range. A long time ago in a galaxy in far, far away, the final frontier. Pete and repeat were on a boat, Pete feel off, who was left? Pete and repeat were on a boat, Pete feel off, who was left? Pete and repeat were on a boat, Pete feel off, who was left? Pete and repeat were on a boat, Pete feel off, who was left? Pete and repeat were on a boat, Pete feel off, who was left? Pete and repeat were on a boat, Pete feel off, who was left? Pete and repeat were on a boat, Pete feel off, who was left? You are not a very good martial artist if you allow your nun-chucks to be taken. Pizza is the best food on the planet because four mutant ninja turtles and an oversized rat can't be wrong. When in Rome... Make your check or money order payable to Norfolk City Treasurer and write the citation number and your vehicle license number on your check or money order. Include your name and address on the envelope and on this citation where indicated below, DO NOT MAIL CASH. Ever watch Fire Fly? Good show! Serenity was better though, way cooler than the show. Foam nun-chucks feel weird, you don't get that sense of power from them, like "oh, I'm holding a foam tube, go me." If you see Anthony Michael Hall walking down the street with a cane, run. Do not let him touch you. Unless you like to be touched. Like grandpa did back in the day. The following celebrities are to be avoided at all cost; Tom Cruise, Sarah Michelle Geller, James Gandolfini, Ben Affleck, Matt Damon, Bruce Springstien, John Bon Jovi, Denis Leary, Dude who played Frodo, let's see, who else... Harrison Ford. Dude from Memento, the dad from Harry and the Henderson's, and Moose from You can't to that on television. Canadian children popping in and out of lockers to tell jokes should be bludgeoned. Friday nights at ten o'clock on the N' watch Degrassi the next generation, "it goes there." If you find yourself in an emergency situation you may call the A-team, but it is infinitely preferable to call McGyver. Who shot J.R.? Why ask why? Try another beer. Now in Fat-free. An over limit charge of $35 will be posted to your account the following day. Isn't it strange that farmable and inflammable mean the same thing? By the rational should tolerable and intolerable mean the same thing? Antidisestablishementarianism. Eclectic shock could occur if used outdoors or on wet surfaces. The formulation of this paper includes Sanitized and it makes all the difference in the world. Todas las declaraciones, comentarios y meanderings situados dentro de este documento son la opinin nica del autor y su dios imaginary del amigo. El editor de este manual no asume ningn resoncibility para los injury's siguientes que podran occur si usted hace realmente lo que dice este libro hacer. 1. Damnation 2. Prdida de vida o de miembro. 3. Appearance de marcas en el pene. 4. Idea que usted es una persona interesante. Adems de estas estipulaciones la distribuidor de este manual quisiera impulsarle no leer esto. Mucho tiempo ha estado pasado para hacer este libro y nos sentimos que la mayora de la prdida del opportune de tiempo sera insistir que nadie realmente uso esto. Se contienen dentro de estas pginas las prcticas ocultas divinas del prncipe de Daemon. Si usted huele el pegamento recuerde que deluente de la pintura l 5x como de gran alcance y marcas un gran msculo relaxant. I would like to take the time here to point out the inconsistency of political practice recently demonstraited by the current administration. But I'm not as intelligent as the "C" student who runs this country so I'll save that for someone who has better diction than I. It is understood between the parties that, with respect to the services to be rendered by Player, for the consideration set forth in the Agreement, such services shall require Player to appear nude and/or semi-nude, and/or perform designated sexual act(s), as the case may be, in the Picture. The general description of the extent of such nudity, and the type of physical contact required in such designated sex acts. Pursuant to terms and conditions of the Agreement, Production Company owns all results and proceeds of Player's services rendered pursuant to the Agreement and has the exclusive right to use, license and exploit the Picture and Player's performance therein, throughout the world in perpetuity in any and all media whether now known or hereafter devised. Thank-you and good luck building your model (you'll need it). Prsident Clinton hat verzgert eine Entscheidung ber entfaltenden "Stern Wars" nationale Flugverteidigung zur folgenden Leitung zugestimmt. Clinton grndete seine Entscheidung auf vier Kriterien: die Wirksamkeit des Systems, die glaubwrdige Drohung, die sie adressieren wrde, seine Implikationen auf Armsteuerung und die Kosten des Programms. Gegrndet auf dem compelling Beweis gegen Sternkriege, berrascht Entscheidung Clintons nicht. Jedoch bevorzugen R$-al.gore und George W. Bush Entwicklung; Spiessen Sie Bevorzugungen auf, die ein begrenzter systemandbusch ein durchdachtes System Sternkrieganblick des ehemaligen Prsidenten Ronald Reagans am nhsten hnelnd bevorzugt. Whoever der folgende Prsident ist, wrde ihre Leitung klug sein, die gefhrlichen Sternkriege des wastefulandes einmal zu annullieren und fr allen 1) Stern arbeiten Kriege nicht. Vom todate mit drei Abschnitttests behauptet das Pentagon das erste war ein Erfolg. Dennoch folgte der erste Test, nur weil der Abschnittflugkrper den groen Lockvogel zuerst ermittelte, der genug zum Zielflugkrper zum Hilfenfhrer das interceptm nah war, das zum Ziel issile ist. Der neueste Versuch an Juli 7 schlug fehl, weil der Abschnittflugkrper getrennt von zur Startrakete ausfiel. Diese Ausflle heben die unzuverlssige Natur der Raketenwissenschaft hervor und bitten die Frage von, ob die amerikanische ffentlichkeit einem System vertrauen kann, das in sich selbst unvollstndig ist. Viele respektierte Wissenschaftler und Politiker sind gegenber dem Testprogramm der Sternkriege sogar vor dem Ausfall Julis 7 kritisch gewesen. MIT-Professor Theodore Postol schrieb das weie Haus nach aufdeckender Informationsvertretung, da der ballistischen Flugverteidigungorganisation (BMDO) Datenerscheinen zu besitzen das System "durch das einfachste der Ballonlockvgel" besiegt wird und da "das BMDO in der Korrdination mit seinen Fremdfirmen versuchte, diese Tatsache zu verstecken, indem es mit den Daten und Analyse" des ersten Tests sich abgab. Buchstabe des Dr. Postols wurde schnell eingestuft. Dieses aufgeforderte Kongreabgeordnete Dennis Kucinich (D-OH-) und 52 andere Mitglieder vom Kongre zum Schreiben des FBI-Direktors Louis Freeh und Verlangen einer Untersuchung, als das Gesetzstatesit ist ungltig, Informationen einzustufen, um Verletzungen des Gesetzes zu verbergen oder Verlegenheit zu einem Personoragency zu verhindern. Kritik des Dr. Postols ist vom Anschlu der beteiligten Wissenschaftler verbunden worden und die Vereinigung der amerikanischen Wissenschaftler, die angegeben haben, da ein Stern System in der LageIST nicht, gegen einfache Gegenmasse wie MehrfachMultiple-warheadflugkrper zu arbeiten Wars oder die.
Introduction
Welcome! And thank-you for the interest (or at least the boredom). You have decided to partake in the age old custom of building stuff. The bulk of this book will be filled with step by step instructions for the building of the Revell StarWars Republic Star Destroyer. You can just throw away the instructions included in the box, they're garbage and have been included inside this more through and updated manual. Neither Lucas Film, or Revell, endorse or promote the use of their products in this manual or the use of this manual in their products. They don't even know about it, so let's keep it on the down-low. I don't want to wake up one night with Lucas Ninja's staring me down with laser-swords. My name is Atom. And I have a cumulative of tens of minutes building stuff, and at least 7 spent on models alone! I started building models at the age of 4. I did the car kit thing then moved on to miniatures. Namely those by Games Workshop for their table top game WarHammer 40K. I've got every tool known to mankind, so building the model will seem really easy as elucidated in this manual. But in actuality the process be incredibly difficult and seem impossible. I will be breaking down the model into the process I used to assemble what I will call version 1.0 (black text). Notes will be highlighted in RED for alternate methods or things I would have done differently or in retrospect. Things written in BLUE are meaningless and should probably be skipped over. And I'll be making fun of you in GREEN. Now that important things are over, ON TO THE ANAL SEX! But of note, this isn't a comprehensive modeling manual meant to cover all the techniques of miniature modeling. I will be assuming you have a basic (and for some a VERY basic) understanding of things like glue and scissors. There is a tremendous amount of resources available on the internet and through other books. The subject of painting in particular ranges so broadly that I cannot even cover the penis with a fig leaf. I've got three books on that subject alone. I will do my best to keep things simple. But if there is confusion about different techniques you may Google them for an in-depth explanation. Or you could just surf the net for porn. Maybe gay porn. With all that said, have fun! Just remember when you're tired, eyes red from paint fumes, fingers bleeding from X-acto cuts and pieces glued to your fingers cause you held on to them instead of clamping them, it's your dumbass that got you into this mess. And if times get tough and you absolutely need help, call me at 757.581.6016 so that I can make fun of you. Or call 210.265.9370, ask for Mr. Morris and he will blow you. In turning the page you agree to the terms previously mentioned. And hold the individual Atom free of all responsibility.
photocopy, sign, date & keep for up your ass for posterity 3
Tools o' da trade

You can spend as little or as much as you like on fancy tools, but that won't make you build better models (see; G. Lucas). All of these items are readily available at hobby stores or online retailers. Some may be found at WalMart or HomeDepot. Notes on alternatives and prices are included in the descriptions. You may find that the local porn store does not stock these items. Dont panic! Get some girl-on-girl mags and try another store.
The shiv
X-acto is a name brand. The tool is actually a plain ol' hobby knife. Essential to the process of removing plastic (do not use on genital warts). Be it from the part-tree or when carving obscenities into bathroom stalls. Always have plenty of blades, these things will dull quickly. I like to have multiple one available with different blades on them. There is an assortment of sizes and shapes, all you really need is the classic stab-you-in-the-face one. Or have one that you know is sharp and other that you might use on different material. You really only need one. Available everywhere from $2-$5.
Running tools
Scissors. They cut stuff. Usually straight, may be gay. Used to cut decal's from the transfer sheet. The smaller ones are better suited for this because of their size and finesse. For these you pretty much get what you pay for. $3-$15. 4
Lesbians
Also know as dykes or more professionally, side-cutters. In the modeling world they call em snips or clippers. But isn't a dyke more fun? This tool is optional. Depending on the model and the quality of the plastic or resin used, cutting the parts from the part-tree may actually damage the part. Use a clipper to snap it quick and easy, trim off the excess with the xacto. Also essential if you plan on modifications and need to pin pieces together. Pinning involves drilling a small hole in two modified pieces, inserting a brass or steel pin to ensure a secure fit. These puppies can get costly, but the good ones are worth it. Since its an optional tool, get the good ones if you get them. The cheep ones will do a job like a knife therefore negating the reason for buying them. Expect to pay $10-15. Having different sizes and even different qualities will allow you to use them on different material without worrying about damaging them. For example a heavy pin wire will only damage the blade of smaller ones, i use the hardware store ones for material like that.
Things that go dull in the night

Files and sandpaper. I wouldn't buy the files from HomeDepot in this case. They'll probably be too big. At a modeling store they're going to charge you a lot for model files ($10-$20). I suggest stealing these from work. Try a mechanical or repair shop. Maybe a good deal on the net? The sand paper can be picked up from HomeDepot because a hobby shop is going to overcharge you for little pieces with no control on the grit. The bigger stuff can be cut (see; running tools above) or ripped. You could even get the paper from an automotive store. You should stick to a grit range of 300-900. Anything lower and it will just eat the plastic away. Though if doing any customization, a 200 grit would be useful in shaping the plastic. Anything higher and you'll be sanding for hours. 300 works good to shape and 600 to smooth (900 if you are really anal). On this model the pieces fit good enough that you can get away without these. Just depends on how involved you want to get. If you feel like half-assing it, you can get away with the sand paper only. The model was quality and anything i used the file on could have been achieved with the 200 grit. So to save money you could just get a couple sheets of 200, 300 and maybe even a 400 for less than ten bucks. Files become essential when working with pewter miniatures. Dont use on balls to simulate a cat tongue. 5
Grabbers
Pliers. I don't know what you do with these, but it makes sense to have them around. They will make you look professional and sexy. Technically you would use these when working with wire. Either custom details or when pinning. Sometimes it may be beneficial to hold a piece with these while sanding or filing. Not worth the effort to use for painting (see; pickers). I dont even know if they have these at modeling stores. They may be to close to real tools that men use. Hobbiest dont like real men that work with things like plasma cutters and reciprocating saws. If you ever want to me some pretty pathetic people, attend a local table-top game session at the local hobby store. These guys are worse than RPGers. Theyre just a Star Trek Con away from LARPing (google; larping and laugh your ass off at these losers).
Pickers
Tweezers, nose hair pluckers (not the industrial gas powered ones you use). I don't know about these either, but every hobby book recommends them. The theory is that you can hold stuff with them. But lets say you wanted to paint something, your fingers would be hurting something fierce from pinching them for five minutes, then you have to figure out where to put the wet piece. If working with very small things you could technically use them to place pieces together for gluing, but it's easier to use your fingers. You can get these from your girlfriend's cosmetic kit. Whores dont carry them since they have no conceivable drug use (trust me). I have them because I have every tool regardless of its usefulness. If youre attempting to build an impressive tool collection you must own at least 3 of which one must be of a different size. In physics tweezers or tongs are known as two 3rd class levers with a common affix point. Optical Tweezers use light to manipulate microscopic objects as small as a single atom. The radiation pressure from a focused laser beam is able to trap small particles. In the biological sciences, these instruments have been used to apply forces in the pico Newton range and to measure displacements in the nm range of objects ranging in size from 10 nm to over 100 mm. 6
Holders
Clamps of various sizes. Most often the smaller and strong the more useful. I highly recommend picking up forceps or surgical hemostat's. You can actually get these pretty cheap off a medical supplier on the net $3-$5. Make sure to get the locking kind. I find them essential when painting certain pieces. Great way to keep them from touching stuff while they dry. You'll want others of larger size to help hold stuff together for glue drying. But a good glue will usually dry quick enough for it to not matter. Only once during the Destroyer project did I use the big Irwin Quick-Grips ($10 HomeDepot). The rest of the time the pair was used to hold my plywood work surface to the coffee table. In advanced modeling I almost never use clamps of any kind. The small ones however can be used for recreational drug use (see; roach clips). Man, I need to come up with some filler here. Im feeling pretty tired for some reason. I think I have mono again. I cant believe Ive been working on this revision for a couple hours and Im only on page 7. This is the easy stuff! What am I going to do when Monday comes around and I need to go back to work? Wait, Im still unemployed. If my check doesnt come on Monday I cant pay rent. I would probably hate writing if it were my job. Can you guess what the background image to these spreads is?
Headache relief
This is an assortment of very small drill bits and the tool that holds them. Know in the hobby circuit as a pin-vice. I don't know why they call it that. I think little-drill makes more sense. This tool isn't required for the Destroyer. If you have one you could attempt to bore out the gun barrels of the ship, but I tried it on one and even with the smallest of bits almost broke the turret. A useful tool if you will be pinning any of the model. The only other place I actually made use of it was cleaning out the fit holes that had been painted over. A model shop will screw you on this item as well (considering it's just a small drill chuck). $10-$20. You would think that you could just hold the bit, but it doesnt work that way for some reason. Dont get zealous and think a drill will work. A normal drill has a variable rpm in the 200+ range. And youre just cheeky if you think a hobby drill will work (those are 2,000-15,000 rpm). Youll just tear the piece apart. 7
Things that require Edison
Drills
Personally, I think everyone should own a Dremel-like tool. RotoZip is more powerful I think. But you can do anything with these. Build a model boat or build an addition to the garage. I don't believe that I used this on the model. But with the assortment of bits available it could potentially replace many tools. Drilling and sanding are the primary modeling uses. Just as most tools are, the cheapest is probably on the net. Comes in a variety of coordinating colours and kits. $40-$100+
Great ideas
And then there was light! This is another optional upgrade that I suggest. Sure you have lamps and ceiling lights, but when working up close and personal it sucks when your own shadow is blocking the project. This style is by far the best. Make sure to get the natural-light bulbs (they're blue). It will help with colour consistency. This is actually a cheap lamp ($20 maybe). At work we had one that was really heavy and had a huge magnifier with a circular florescent in it. I was going to steal it seeing as how it sat in the corner for years. But I got lazy. Those run into the hundreds of dinero, snag one if you get the chance. I'll buy it from you if you don't want it.
8
Hot wet and sticky

Good ol' hot glue is the modern solve it all that can replace Duct Tape with the proper marketing campaign backing it up. If McGyver had a battery powered one of these bad boys, men would run in fear. Though the price ranges from $4 to well over $100, you'll only need the cheapest one you can get your paws on. They've got all sorts of different glue for different applications with colour and sparkles, but you will need regular sticks. This tool I consider essential if you decide undercoat the model. You must affix the model to something with weight to prevent the spray from literally blowing the pieces everywhere. And not the blowing that you are thinking.
Just sticky
SuperGlue. I think that might be a trademarked name. Since we are only dealing with plastic in this kit, you will need a cyanoacrylate adhesive. It actually breaks down the molecular structure of plastic forming a cement bond where the two pieces are melted together to become one. And is the primer in W.M.D's. If we were trying to bond plastic and metal, you would be using a regular SuperGlue like the one in the center of the photo (which this one acts like a CA+ as well). The Destroyer model comes with glue. Once you open the box, remove the bag with the included tools, open the bag and remove the glue. Go to the parking lot and find the car of someone you hate (landlord?). Remove the cap and proceed to squeeze the entire bottle into the door locks. That's about as useful as this crap glue is. It'll gum the fuck out of someone Beamer, but is complete camel piss otherwise. Fuck you very much Revell. In-between the bottles you will see applicator brushes. These are very helpful at times and come in a variety of sizes (each colour is different) They are kind of spendy for how fast you can go through them (depending on the size a pack of 10, 7, or 5 will run you about $3). The Destroyer is such a big model I only used these a couple times. 9
Advertising may be described as the science of arresting the human intelligence long enough to get money from it.
Bondo
Why is this photo so big? Because the last group of tools deals with paint and should begin on it's own page. The real question is can I fill the rest of this page with useful information. But I guess if I did, it would be the first page in this book that has had any useful information. Don't get your hopes up. Modeling putty wasn't used on my first construction of the Destroyer model, but will in the second version now that I know where gap problems could occur. I want to say that I've read somewhere you can use automotive bondo to do the same thing. I would Google that information. But if it's true then you will save cash. A gallon bucket of bondo runs $15. That tube pictured was about$10. There are countless brands and type of putty. Games Workshop has a particularly good two part putty you mix together and mold before it dries. You may also want a tool to shape it (from an art store $2-$7). Most putty takes a day or so to dry, though you can usually sand it in 30-90 minutes. Since I'm out of useful banter I'll include a photo of a model in which I did use putty. This has been sanded and is ready for a base coat of paint. 10
Wonderful World of colour
Reading material
I've gotten to my level of painting through seconds and months of trial and error. Along the way I've read many books. They made me the sex machine I am today. These three pertain specifically to miniatures. There is so much information when it comes to painting that I feel as though I shouldn't even bring it up. I Strongly urge you to pick up at least one book that deals with models ($10-$20). It will cover everything I talk about in more depth and things I'll flat out ignore. Im not going to get into the basics like how to properly hold a brush or the many techniques that Ive just grown accustom to using. Just like any art you have to practice to make perfect. There is always the net if you can keep yourself away from the porn long enough.
Fun with walls
At last count there was 8.4 million varieties of paint manufactures. And there are different types of modeling paint. I used a Model Master Enamel Paint for my first build. It must be thinned and cleaned with a paint thinner, and it may be used with an airbrush. I didn't use an airbrush but will address that during the assembly. The other type of paint is water based, such as the line from Citedel. I've used these in other models and enjoy the easy of using water based, but I'm not entirely sure if I will use that on the second build. Most paint will run $2-$3 bucks a bottle. Depending on the airbrush scenario you may also want to pick up a spray for a primer coat. Don't get this from a model store. The one pictured runs $10 a can. HomeDepot will sell you a plastic bonding spray for 1/3 of that. Oh yeah, take the paint that comes with the model and shove it up your ass, wait a week, poop into a plastic bag and mail back to the manufacture. Actually I didnt even open the paint, Im keeping it around if i ever need one of the only three colours they send you. 11
Utensils
An artist is only as good as his brush. Okay, maybe that's bullshit, but brush selection is very important. In the beginning while you learn how to paint don't get crazy with how much you spend. A quality brush can get as high as $20 each. I tend to stick around $7. You'll only need three brushes to finish the Destroyer. The box contains one #2 brush. Not a great quality and really a size that is debatably useful. You'll want a 20/0 for detail work. A 3/8" for area cover. I would buy a better quality #2 for in-between work and edge fixing. The particular ones I used are white Royal Soft Grip in the photo. I really liked them, they're available at Michael's Art Supply for about $4-$6 each.
Mixing' it up
Paint cups, paint pallet, and stir sticks. The cups are great if you are mixing your own colours. That depends on if you want to do that or not. It's easier to just buy all the colours you will use, and there isn't much highlighting to do. The only time I used them was to thin out the ink for the wash (detailed later). They're cheap enough at an art store that I would pick them up when you get brushes ($3-$5 for a dozen). If you do mix your own grey's for the model, make sure you get pots big enough to hold the amount you'll need to mix. You don't want to run out of a custom colour half way through the model! I didn't use the pallet on the Destroyer, but you could. Stir sticks, If you buy these make sure to come over to my place so I can slap you. All of those pictured are recycles from used glue applicators and old paint brushes with the ends cut off. Be creative, don't use your penis! But you will need something because new paint has always separated, the pigment from the medium. 12
Clean up
Paper towels, old white undershirts, rags. Let me tell you now to save any disappointment. You will spill something. Paint, ink, thinner. Maybe I'm just stupid, But between the ink and thinner I spilled about eight times over the week I stretched this project. As you can see in the photo of the thinner, I eventually glued a base on the mini-thinner pot to help keep this from happening. Usually it was because I had left a brush in it and knocked the brush. Which you should never do, unless you use a clamp like I did. This prevents the weight of the brush off the expensive bristles. The paper towels are a necessity when drybrushing. Also useful when waiting for the paint to dry and the urge to jerk-off arises. Don't buy the thinner at models store. They'll ask $3 for a tiny bottle, buy it from HomeDepot for $5 and use a syringe to fill up an empty pot. Or if you decide that this project is hell, inject 35cc of thinner into you neck.
N.F.E.T.P.
13
The Republic Star Destroyer
How you made it this far I may never know. But that you did means I should continue along this path to damnation with you. I will start each step with the applicable step from the O.G. manual (and poop all over it). Query's about inconsistencies should be sent to Revell-Monogram, LCC 725 Landwehr (I know, and yes that's spelled right) Rd. Northbrook IL 60062.
My box is open, what do I get?

If you actually went and purchased the tools I suggested you may now use the knife to carefully cut the tape that holds the goodies inside. Or tear that bitch open like a virgin.
14
I'm going to ignore part numbers because if you can't keep track of 60 parts that our distinctly different you shouldn't be building models. Once out of the box (make sure it's all there, two halves and four trees) you may begin to separate the pieces from the trees. As you can see in the photo to the left, I have well trimmed fingernails. Im actually scared of trimming them too much. As soon as there is white area it annoys me and I want to hack it. But it seems like over the years my nails are growing back further. Ive never been a nail bitter, but I figure its about the same thing.
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There are two school of thought in the removal of parts. The first says that you should paint the parts while still on the tree. This isn't a bad idea for tiny parts. But it's far from a great idea. Once painted and then cut from the tree you will have to touch up paint from where you cut. Plus you won't be able to remove any of the flashing (see; later steps). I removed all the pieces first, it's your call. Even those cheeky Germans tell you to use tweezers. Pratt's. No I didn't set fire to the box, that's a clever graphic. The model actually comes rather clean. I did little to no clean up before starting assembly. Once certain pieces were connected I then filed and sanded til my hearts content. After telling J. about this project of mine, he suggested that I send the finished draft to the manufactures of the model. Great idea but I would have to pay shipping. And just like all the letters Ive sent to companies, I will never hear back. The best that I could tell, the images on the above photograph arent actually of the Destroyer. Cheep asses. I should work the graphics department of somewhere. I should get this published. Between this and the Cruise book I should be able to land a desk job. Eventually I could put on more and more weight and fulfill the title of Jabba! Twelve page manual my butt. I wonder if they even paid someone to make that or just had cousin Olaf do it on his iMac. The great thing is I cant be sued because this would be considered a parody.
I glued the pieces to create eight groups. You don't have to do this. There are many good reasons to glue the entire model together before painting. But to paint the details, you must assemble it in sections. 16
The first group was the upper and lower half of the hull. The upper half was stand alone (that means no additional parts). I lied about part numbers, I'll throw them in to help you. The lower half of the hull was assembled with parts 39, 40, 41, 42, 43, 44, 45, 46, 47, 48, 49, 53 and 54. If I were to do it again I would possibly only assemble the hull, 53 and 54. The side details would be much easier to paint individually. Greater detail could then be put into these pieces. As it was, I got lazy near the end of the project and sorta just slopped on the paint. It's up to you. If you decided to leave them off, just glue them on when you glue the rear engine area onto the hull. I'll point that part out when we get there (so your dumbass isn't confused). The two inserts into the hull are a definate glue, they're the same colour scheme as the hull and getting the details in there is much easier.
17
The second group was the main engines. It combined pieces 20, 21, 22 ,23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 36, 37, 38 and 57(four pieces). Ignore the little Space Marine Sergent in-between the engines. This assemblage wasn't problematic. Now if you really want you could leave off those little wing-walls to make some painting of the engines easier. Or you could leave off the four engines to allow more freedom when painting them. Personally I don't really think it matters either way since the engines don't require much detail. I suggest you dry assemble it (that's without glue) and see how you feel about maneuvering a brush in that confined space. Be sure you sand down the rounded edges of the two engine halves before gluing them to the engine wall. You'll see the detail of what I'm talking about in the sublight engine assembly. You have my permission to look ahead at the next page without finishing this page. I suppose I should have suggested in the beginning that you read through the entire manual before starting. I think there is a recommendation like that on the side of the box. Those silly Germans.
18
Group three contains parts 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10 and 11. This constructs the control tower. You'll notice I left off the pilot house(s). This makes painting that trench inbetween the two towers easier. Pretty self explanatory, wouldn't do it different a second time. Make sure you sand/file down any edges. Everything fit pretty snug. Next time I'll be using filler putty anyway. Just an anal detail. If you plan on doing to yours, after sanding a seam clean it out with water and canned air. Once dry use a spatula tool to smooth over any visible joints. Once dry sand again to smooth finish. Below is an example of what it should look like when done. Looks sloppy but once undercoated it will be as smooth as... something smooth. The one below was actually rather difficult with all those angles. Getting a file or sand paper into some of those spots can be tricky. I dont like second drafts. Fuck writing. I dont want to re-write this entire thing. I havent really changed much this time around. Mostly cosmetic. I guess Im not a real writer. I just dont have the motivation to invest more energy into this project. Page 19, half way don't at least. My luck, once finished it wont convert into a PDF. I worked on a zine when I lived in Oregon. This was in 96 when the last of the diehards still made zines with scissors and paste. It wasnt until I was attending UCLA a couple years later that I actually learned all the techniques that would have been helpful back then. Something is wrong with my brain that I dont feel an urgency to get a job when Im 15K in debt and have no money to buy food. Maybe Im the weaker in Darwin's paradigm that just needs to die off. 19
The two pilot houses were assembled with parts 1, 2, 3 and 4. Again nothing new to amend in this process. I didn't really like how the pieces fit together, felt flimsy. I'm not sure what else you could do with that. Maybe use more glue, or filler putty? You could even try hot glue from the glue gun. Don't burn yourself! But you could fill parts 1 and 3 with hot glue, quickly put the plastic glue on the edges of 2 and 4. Mash them together really quick and duck (I'm not sure if it's technically safe to mix those two glues). In the above photo is a good example of an edge that has yet to be sanded down (the white area on the closest pilot house). Once glued I used a file to smooth any really bad spots. Then used a 320 grit to make all the edges flush. That tank barrel in the photo was something I had planned on adding but couldnt get the colours to match quite right. Actually one thing Ive failed to mention is that you should have a secondary activity available to waste time while paint is drying or you just start to burnout. I was assembling several models at the same time (hence the misc stuff youll see in the background of the photos). A book would work. I was also watching movies during the process. For some reason these stupid Germans include a clock on the instructions. It reads the same time in each photo, so I dont know what it means. The assortment of other icons bewilders me as well. Their explanations are very monosyllabic. I wonder if they know how stupid they are. They did try to kill all the Jews. Did we forget about that? Like how BMW used Jewish slaves and then said they were a victim of the war? I also heard that whitey didnt have a choice in who his slaves were. We wanted Japs but the man said we had to take the darkies. White people are stupid. At least were on par with everyone else.
20
The third to last group is the Blaster Cannon turrets (I think Blaster needs a symbol, but fuck G.L.) In the photo below you can see the attempt I made on one turret to hollow the barrels out. They are so small that I could barely get it centered (and as you see I didn't) and almost broke the piece. If you decide to trump me and try this, start the hole with a pinprick from a needle. Then with a very small bit hand turn the hole. Originally I thought it would be cool if the tips were lit red with fiberoptic (and technically speaking it still would be cool). But now I realize this is an impossibility. I guess you could do it, but the difficulty would be, a lot. For some reason the Germans tell you not to glue these. I did. I had to cut off part of the stem and re-drill the painted holes just to get these back on the model during the final assembly. I guess the Germans are anticipating G.L. making changes to the ship in the future. Easier to replace parts if theyre not glued on. A smart man may have showed the sublight drive engines first since I take you through the sanding process which needs to be applied before some of the gluing. But I wouldn't know because I'm not a smart man. But you can see the seam quit clearly in the first photo (left). Below you see that after filing ad sanding the seam is barely there. Now when painted the seam will not show at all. The sublight parts are 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18 and 19. With each engine being separate they couldn't get any easier to paint. I almost glued them to the tail of the ship, but things work out better if you keep that piece separate. Working on models is how I first became interested in Hollywood. Stan Winston, built the models and did the special effects for many movies in the late eighties and early nineties. Seeing the detail they put into small things that they were going to blow up gave me a stiffy. That was one of mine favorite parts of Lord of the Rings special features, seeing all the bigatures that they built for the movie. I just love that movies are an amalgamations of so many artistic talents. Movies are really the corporations of the art world. Words, word word, word noun verb word. Bla, ga fens sdnfo enss. Inwfa snd foensp osnf aoa feiuni fiaepq fn abdcp snonwf. Nofowo san iu n nawofun. Nowaf asjdfnpaiu uhd anlipa qu adfioa iuekljadfb w l hfbiw iuiughw ifii aug is ibilfauhl f. Hb ia iilf bwbai iwqwue bf iq id yb iagiududjasshdb hs hai afw abmaqobn e iofba aoiy iuaw y bfm, iwbf iu hg iaiuyfi iwifwaibao iuiuy aisab iwu aiuydfa. 21
The tail of the ship is made with the remaining pieces, 32, 33 and 34. Another nobrainer assembly. Once glued just make sure to take care of that unsightly seam.
Sheit Nigga. At the rate we be going it'll be done in no time! You are almost done with the prep! You should have eight core groups. 1. Upper Hull (this baby is basically naked, it was really out the box) 2. Lower Hull, required the attachment of two bottom pieces and possibly the eleven (11) side detail (remember up to you). 3. Main engine assembly (four engines and three rear wall pieces) 4. Control tower 5. Two (2) pilot houses 6. Guns 7. Sublight drive engines (the small ones) 8. Ship tail Shit, I just remembered in my little head about pieces 28, 29, 30, 31, 51 and 52. Just glue them on the Upper Hull. I think that's what I did. They're pretty small so it doesn't matter. Oh yeah, while looking at the O.G. instructions I noticed the eight (8) piece fifty-sixes. Those go on the main engines. Okay I think I covered my flubs. If there are extra pieces after that just throw them away. Other wise they'll get jealous and cause problems later. 22
Time to prime! Just like any of the other techniques in modeling there are a couple schools of thought for proper prime. Even if you obtain and have the courage to use an airbrush, you will want to rattle-can a prime coat. If you can't rattle-can properly don't be shy. Better to admit it than fuck up a model before you even start it. Practice on cardboard or the cat. The instructions are on the can, read them. They actually work pretty well. 12 inches, sweeping motion, multiple coats are better than a think one that runs into all the model details. Now that you are a professional tagger, a decision about colour must be made. I primed in black. This ended up working out but took many coats of paint to get solid colour. This is due to the translucent nature of paint. At first I thought I should have done it in white to simplify colour coverage. But when you get down to the science of paint black absorbs more colour. White reflects. I feel that due to the dirty nature of a space craft the undercoat of black is what to go with. It will require many coats of grey but will result in a darker toned grey. If the undercoat is white the entire model will appear brighter. This is a desired result when painting a coloured model. But the Destroyer is almost devoid of any colour. And the largest patch of colour is meant to be darker. Again it's artistic choice (means you decide).
I was a bit zealous at this stage and didn't get any other photo's. The three pieces pictured are just sitting in the box. A coat was applied and the piece was turned. In all I got the desired coverage in two full coats. All the other groups not in the above photo were affixed to pieces of cardboard to prevent them from flying all over from the pressure of the spray. Using hot glue I would put a dime size ooze on the cardboard, wait a few moments for the glue to slightly cool (this make removal of the piece easier). 23
Once slightly cool I would stamp a piece into it upright. For example one card had the four sublight engines standing on end. Be sure to leave enough space between parts to spray. And remember to stick the end that doesn't need to be painted into the glue. For the gun turrets I used a piece of board with eight globs of glue. For the tail end I used a line of glue. The pilot house it a bit difficult since you want the entire part primed. In this photo you see that I took two stir sticks, glued them to an old paint pot, then if you can imagine I glued the two towers onto the ends (in their holes) so that they were suspended to a weight so I could spray them. Now for the lower hull it will depend on if you glued the side on or not. If you didn't then just do it like you did the upper hull and hot glue all the side facing up on some board and spray. If you did glue the sides on you will need to find something about the size of a soda can and hot glue the bottom to it. In the photo you can see where I did this. This will keep the model up and away from the board so you can get good coverage and not worry about spray-gluing the model to the cardboard. I forgot something else. Why do you want to undercoat? Plastic by its nature is not porous and doesn't like allowing paint to adhere to the surface. The primer coat will give you a smooth surface that will bond with the paint you brush on. Once everything is good and primed it's time to do a dry fit of the entire model. This ensures that nothing got warped or broken yet so far. Plus it's an ego boost to see the model somewhat assembled for the first time. And if there are parts that are showing some of the grey plastic don't worry. Better to have a light splotchy coat than a heavy solid coat. I must admit that it looks pretty cool here. I think my flatmates may have even suggested leaving it like this. Certainly would make the project easier. Doubt I would have invested all this time in a book if it was going to stop at this stage. Matter of fact, Ill bet Ive spend as much, if not more time working on the book as the model. The model was spread out over two weeks. Probably could be finished in a 3-5 day stretch if you worked on it exclusively. I think the model was easier than the book. No real creative thought had to be put into a flying death ship.
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Now you are on to what will consume the bulk of the building time. Painting. The O.G. manual has sketchy painting instructions at best. The model comes with three paints while the instructions indicate fifteen different paints! Fuck you Germany! What I did, and is included in this manual, is to break down the pallet into ten colours. Which is really 3 colours and 7 grey's. You'll need 1. Light blue (optional is a dark blue, you're only using the light blue for some windows. You can then mix the remainder with some grey to get a dark blue for the engine colour) 2. Aluminum (this one is actually optional, it's only used on the tiny barrels of the turbo lasers, you can get away with any one of the grey's here) 3. Reddish brown (I mixed this colour with a bright red, brown and grey, but you could just find a red that is dark) Now the seven grey's I picked at random. I just went and bought seven different shades/tints. I didn't go by and colour scheme (like from the box). I just made sure to have a good solid grey for the main hull (x2 bottles!), a dark grey for the engine, and a light grey. The other four I pulled out my ass (and it hurt). The exact colours I used were, Flat Gull Grey (hull), Medium Sea Grey (my light grey), Dark Sea Grey (my anthracite grey), Aircraft Grey, Gloss Grey (which ended up looking just like the Dark Sea), and Light Grey. As you may note I only used six grey's (one of the grey's is used so sparingly it might as well be combined with another. When it comes down to it I did most of the work with four grey's. You could look at the box or photo's from the movies or net to figure a custom colour scheme if you like. I think what I did worked out pretty well. I will provide instructions for the use of seven grey's with notes of how to do it in four. I don't have many photo's of the painting because it's boring. I just sort of felt it out as I went along. The first thing I did was coat everything (except the engines) in my base grey. This took the longest since I had to cover up all the black. In this photo you can see that there are still black streak showing through the grey. This is 3 coats!
25
Here you can see what the progress will look like. On the right hull I have the full 5 coats needed to have a smooth coverage. Another reason it take so many coats is that you want to put them on very thin. There are many little detail like the hull plating that may become obscured with gobs of paint if you put it on to thick to quickly.
The one on the left shows what one coat looks like. You can see the tower in the extreme right of the photo. I was originally isolating the grey's. You can do this, it doesn't really matter. I ended up do the 4 coats where that was going to be the main colour, and only one coat if another colour was going on top. In other words coat everything once with the base grey and only worry about making a smooth coat where that is the colour to be seen. The following pages will be used to break down what colour to paint where. If in doubt refer to my model or the box photo. The colour key is as follows; A - anthracite grey (dark grey) D - light grey (main hull colour) F - grey (heavily used, drybrush colour, mine had a slight blue tint) H- light grey (slightly lighter than the hull colour) G - brownish red I - light blue B - gunship grey (used like once) C- tank grey (on mine this was so close to A that they're the same, only used twice) E - dust grey (I never used it, I put F or A in its place) J - fire red (I ignored) K - aluminum L - light yellow (I ignored) 26
27
This is a funny section. I completely left it out in the first draft! I probably should read what Ive written to see what information which may be pertinent needs to be filled in. But as stated before I hate to revise. I was pretty loose with the painting process. The only place I took liberties in the model. Its really difficult to figure 8 different grey's and their use. I did take some shots from the movie, but theyre not of any help. I think in the end the paint scheme I used worked out pretty well. So that is what Ive outlined in this book. The Germans are completely useless when it comes to the painting part. The might as well of said paint it any fucking way you want.
Editing their manual into something that made sense was difficult on many levels. Their illustrations merged the painting and assembly into 8 crappy pages. Even now as I look at it I find things I missed (placement of the decal's by the gun emplacement, opps!) And areas like the underside trench (above illustration), I just painted what I felt like. Didnt even look at the book. On the next one I build I will take time and research photos more and design a colour scheme ahead of time. Maybe Ill have an addendum to my manual addendum. 28
Sperm.
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If these pieces are attached to the hull it's best to come up with some what to hold it hull to keep your greasy paws off the freshly painted surface (see how I made use of a big clamp!) Below you can see how lazy of a painter I really am. You can still see the undercoat black in parts, but it will work for shading. The light grey was applied to all the sides then I applied the dark grey by overbrushing (google: painting overbrushing). I was carful and detailed in some bits, but for the most part you can do it quick and dirty with the #2 brush.
30
Once I was satisfied with the coverage of the dark grey I drybrushed over the A' paint with F' paint. I'll discuss this technique on the next page. For now you can see that the effect will be a weathered appearance where highlights are made on the edges. This is a very easy technique that bumps the model to a new level aesthetically.
Once the drybrush has dried an ink wash was used. I forgot to tell you to buy that. Go buy ink wash. I'll cover that technique with drybrushing. But feel free to google either one of those techniques as well since there are varying opinions on the best way to do it. The ink will rest and dry in the cracks and crevasses which will deepen detail and contrast the drybrush highlight. It also has the ability to "punch up" colour a bit.
31
As illustrated in the next three photos, drybrushing is when you dip the brush in paint, then wipe off all the surface paint. Exactly how much to wipe off takes experience. But you pretty much want to make it so a swipe on the paper towel no longer leaves paint. Done correctly paint will still remain deep in the bristol's. Now once you drag the brush across a rigid surface, the raised edges will pick up that remaining paint. Got it? I hope so.
Here is another example of how drybrushing will change the look of a piece. All the engine are done in the same way. Black undercoat, dark grey coverage, F' drybrush and ink wash. Note that the two tiny engines on the upper hull along with the two blast shield looking pieces are done in that exact manor aforementioned. It looks particularly good on the engines which are entirely dark grey and have plenty of hard edges to catch the paint. I like to do the wash after the drybrush because the ink will darken and deepen the piece. I don't know if it really matters which you do first. Both only take a few moments to do (ink may take longer to dry). I didn't, but you could technically drybrush the entire hull with the lighter grey (next build I will be doing more advanced shading/highlighting).
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Using ink in the other quick and easy to make a model stand out beyond flat colouring. It's basically a really thinned down paint. I think you could even make it yourself (google it). But you can buy it for about the same cost as paint. I did two different inkings on the model. For the first wash I cut the ink with 75% water (it come pretty damn strong out of the pot). Then I added a couple drops of hand soap. This breaks the surface tension of the ink and water helping to spread the ink into recesses areas and not pool on flat areas. If you really want to dirty the ship up you could add some PVA glue for the opposite effect. As you see in these two four engines the topmost two have been inked, bringing out more detail.
The second application of ink I did was with the 100% strength stuff. You'll see that later on when I show the hull work. Basically I did a wash then detail inked certain areas. In the last photo is another example of the ink effect. When washing I used the biggest brush and generously covered everything, I then immediately wiped it off with a paper towel. This step is repeated to the desired look.
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Painting the red piping. At first I thought those were decal's, no luck. You have to mask and paint them yourself. Looking at the box, my model, and the first paint schematic you should be able to determine where the lines on the main box are. Use a low-tack masking tape. Like three bucks at the hardware store. Use something plastic and hard like the edge of a credit card to smooth the tape edge for a secure mask The upper hull main strip is pretty easy with only a mask at the beginning and end. The lower hull requires cutting angles to conform to the hull plating angles. Once the main shape on the wings is made you can create the stripes. I don't know how you are going to do this, but I'll tell you how I did it. Using a precision mechanical ruler I came up with a good division that allowed for five what I guessed to be appropriately spaced lines. In this case I made each line mask I pica thick. Once I knew my size I put tape on a surface that I could cut on and would easily release the tape. I measured and cut 16 strips using the edge of the ruler for strait cuts.
Removing each strip I again guessed at the spacing using the paint schematic with the hull lines as an approximate gauge. There was a lot of guessing involved, but in the end it worked.
34
Once the mask was complete and the paint mixed I started covering it all up. I did about three coats. I think it would have been interesting to see the red with a black undercoat. The faint grey center strip on the upper hull was just painted carefully. It was too small to mask so I just cut-in with the red (google painting cutting in). No mask is ever perfect. Once dried and tape removed I came back and cut in with some hull grey to fix spots like this. Making sure to really smooth the tape edge will reduce the amount of this occurrence.
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Here is another place I had to come back and cut in. The light blue windows and black porticoes. In recessed areas like this you can combine techniques like cutting-in with overbrushing to simplify the matter. Seeing that blue reminds me to point out how I did the engine-blue. For the four larger engines I laterally pored paint into the engine. I did this with the smaller ones as well but be careful if you try. They are halves and are not paint-tight. This turned out better than I thought it would (I really did it cause I'm lazy). But if you notice that light blue streak in one of the engines? You could really add a cool effect by swirling in a couple different colours or tints. Again an accident on my part, but it works. You end up with a really smooth non-brushed look by doing this.
36
I added some scorch marks to the tail while building the engine assembly. Once all the colours on the tail were finished I lined up the sublight engines and marked a spot with a sharpie marker. Just to get the engines back on I had to drill out the paint which had filled the holes. I had to put the tail in the clamp to get a proper hold on everything. Using the black primer I then did a quick spray using the model to actuate the nozzle. Practice this a couple times on cardboard before attempting otherwise you'll just coat the entire thing in black.
37
With the engines drybrushed and inked, the tail and sublight engines set, I glued the entire rear assembly together.
38
Then when I completed the towers and pilothouses I glued all of them to the upper hull.
39
Before inking the hull I applied the slide transfer of the circle. Another one goes on the control tower. The model comes with a couple more, but I don't read German so I couldn't figure where to put them. First cut out the transfer you will be using. Put them in water for... I don't know, long enough so that they slide of the transfer sheet. Using the x-acto knife slide them into position. Using a big of paper towel dab them dry, re-wet to reposition if necessary. For the circle I waited for it to dry and re-cut the hull plating lines so it might look less like a sticker.
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The difference an ink makes. In the next set of photos you will see how the wash will dirty up and dull things. Spot where I went in with the 100% ink to really push up the shading.
Below you can see how just one wash (the top half) will bring out the detail that was previously lost in the flat paint coverage.
(Right) After the first wash was wiped off I would go in and deposit drops of the diluted wash in certain corners. The ink would flow out threw the crevasses and leave a nice splotchstain. Later I came back and repeated the drop in select areas with the 100% ink.
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You can really see the varying ink depths in this shot. I had to do double and triple on the red to make sure it showed.
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Both halves complete I then glued them together. I aligned everything, checked fit. Left a small crack round the entire piece and started with the nose. Using the glue brush I did the front and held it for 15 seconds. I then slowly made my way round the model with the brush. Some parts I had to glue, clamp and glue again to secure a proper fit.
The final step was to seal the model with a flat acrylic. This is available in spray or brush form. If you spray, just be careful of leaving a speckle like finish. I brushed it on and made sure it was well covered. Make sure to use a matte finish (it would look kinda silly if it were gloss)! And though it's now technically waterproof, don't play with it in the tub. But if you spill coffee (sperm, cat puke, etc) on it, you can just run some warm water over it.
Conclusion
I thought this book would be funnier, but I got so wrapped up in actually writing a manual that hopefully makes a little sense that I forgot what I was doing. Building the model was actually easier than writing this book. When you have the technical knowledge it all becomes sort of automatic. I never really thought about the process until after the model was finished. I feel the book makes it out to be rather difficult. But everything in here is really basic to the modeling world. On the second one I plan on spending much more time painting. I will probably be isolating each of the hull plates and layering lighter paint to highlight the edges. Shading can be done along certain edges where naturally less light will fall. And then there is the fibreoptics. Those are installed at the first sanding/gluing phase. I will have to devise battery placement and access. Once the model receives the final ink you then finish the fibre-optics right before the finish coat. But that is a story for another time...
Conclusion 1.2
Again I think maybe I should actually read what Ive written in order to properly revise it. But ohfucking-well. Im just happy to have finished the layout for the second time. I did get lazy in the last twenty pages, but nobody is paying me. Unlike the president of the U.S. who is paid and not only lazy, but a fuck head!How this country doesnt revolt is beyond me. I guess its all the compassionate conservatives. God bless them. I should go buy a pro-Bush book to see what it is people think he has done that is good. I bet he couldnt make a 46 page manual on building a model. Why couldnt I have been born into a position where daddy could give me an oil company to run, and then a baseball team, and then the country. Ive gotta go take a dump now, thinking about Bush does that to me.
46
In closing I would like to thank all the big people that made this possible while trampling on the little people who were fodder to get here. And you know who I'm talking about. The big "G". God made all of this possible by giving George Lucas powers of the unholy. I thought this would have been more enjoyable, but I'm just happy to get it over with. The final file size before compression 98,862kb. Almost 100 megs of shit by me. Written and photographed by me. To be fair 99% is just the photographs. What's really sad is the man-hours that I'll never get back from this. I won't even get the satisfaction of posting a blog that people could at least give me feedback on. I thought I might start from the beginning and edit it. I'm sure I'm all over the place in this thing. But once photos were laid it kinda locks the text. Maybe I should have planned what I intended to write before actually doing the layout. All I did was look at the photos in the approximate order that they were taken and talk about them. I hope you at least got one laugh from this. Maybe something that was helpful? I wish I knew where I could post this on the net so other people might download it and read it. I need to find a forum where people post instructions to model kits just in case you lost them. Then when they download what they think is the O.G. manual they get this!! Or I could print up a bunch and sneak into the warehouse and replace the instructions with mine. Maybe I should just get one copy printed and send it to Revell. I suppose I might want to supply some contact info so when this breaks onto the net people know where to send money. Or lawsuits. Actually, thinking that people might read this makes me want to give that 2nd draft a try... Na, fuck it. I say the mark of a great writer is in his ability to not give a fuck about what he creates once the first draft is done. I flunked my way through H.S. with that ideal. I should have spend this time studying for my job interview. And a recent offer has me considering Minnesota. I don't want to go to Minnesota, it's like 20 degrees during the summer. But who knows, I'll get pay comparable to California with half the living expense. Right, anyway I bid you good luck in your model building attempts. Call if you get stuck or have any questions. Maybe I could get paid to write instruction manuals... Why stop at models? I could do DVD players and televisions. Prophylactics, condoms. I could revolutionize the manual industry! I will be god of the flashing 12:00 on VCRs everywhere!
48

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