March 18, 2013

UD Mens Magazine Quarterly

Featuring Patrick 'Patar' The Drinker Philosopher
p.4

(whatever that means)

p.3

p.2

p.8

p.5

About UD Men's Magazine Yesterday I had a hamburger in my pocket and the guy standing next to me kept making strange faces due to the hamburger's odor. In my mind I decided 'putting a hamburger in your pocket if you don't have deodorant on' is a great tip for a mens magazine, possibly a UD mens magazine. That second the UD Men's magazine came to be. -Rafi Bernardo Looking for contributors. I merely put together material given to me by UD men. This magazine is run by men of UD. Many don't know it yet too. Shoot an email to rbernardo@udallas.edu with your pickuplines, man tips on hygiene, cooking tips, quotes, photos, links to videos and anything you would like on the magazine. Also shoot me an email if you think you belong on the front cover. Next Issue will Highlight UD Musicians/Bands, so please send information/facebook pages/photos to rbernardo@udallas.edu if you or your band would like to be featured.
Quotes from UD Men A man without a cat is a man entirely without hope -Damien Hoblob Be sure all that we too nor later you? Joseph Quinlan The eyes are the windows to the soul. Anonymous Open a fast food area 24/7 on campus. Supposedly all freshmen. Don't live in Madonna -Michael Deluca Trust in God but lock your car-John Stein Only a fool looks for logic in the chambers of the human heart -Dylan Myers ^ True Dat Christian Gontarz Check yourself before you wreck yourself. -Anonymous You win some you lose some. As long as the outcome is income. -Alex Ziolkowski

Chemistry Majors should figure out a way to make in and out deoderant. -Anonymous If I see my name anywhere in this magazine I'm going to sue you -Ambrose Stearns Stay tan, stay good looking-Ryan Landry 1

Man of the Week Patrick Patar Rowles

Anonymous Quotes about Patar Patar is a favorite according to the girls bathroom graffiti. Patar has the most beautiful eyes I had ever seen. Im not even kidding you. Patar listens even when he doesnt have to. Patar usually doesn't tells anybody he's fluent in German. Quotes about Patar He burps like a goat -Mike Deluca Patar says he hates the Giants-Tony Delatorre He's the scientist that never was -James Myer

Tell me about your life. I'm from Nappa Valley. I pretend to know a lot about wine. I played rugby from the age of five. In my free time I enjoy watching South Park and playing corn hole. I like drinking too. Tell me about Philosophy. I considered persuing a triple major before pursuing philosophy. I never liked reading when growing up. The only thing I enjoyed reading was philosophy. . On philosophy, Plato is the best to read. If you ever have a chance to, take classes from Dr. Wood. How did you end up in UD? My uncle and three of my brothers went to this school. I wanted to go to a Catholic School and I liked the idea of the Rome program. Tell me a story of a time you did something difficult. I went backpacking once with all the men in my family. It was with my dad, my brothers and a few cousins . We went to the Teatons which is south of Yellowstone. We overpacked so our backpacks were really heavy, and we ended up hiking 13 miles in one day in the highest elevation. It was the hardest physical thing I had ever done. I was limping for three days afterwards. Any words of wisdom? You shouldn't hurry big decisions because sometimes the right decision take a long time to make. Where do you see yourself in 10 years? Either billionaire CEO of a fortune 500 company or a monk. Do you have any advice on talking to women here at UD? Start with a proposal. Then start with small talk. Especially if it's in the spring they are expecting a ring. So buy a ring.

Madonna Hall Photos

Yeah Thermon! Drink that tea.

Pickup Lines from people in Madonna I'm Joseph Andrews -Joseph Andrews Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk back again? -Anonymous Hello, my name is ______ -Anonymous Have you been waiting for me because I have been waiting for you. -Anonymous Hey girl. Was God showing off when he made you? -Eric HofBauer Malibu is an effective way of meeting peopleAnonymous

Classic Coca Cola of Christopher F.

Room of the Week: Anthony Guerra's Room

What kind of shoes do you like Anthony? I like vans but too many people wear them. I like to be different. My favourite shoes to wear daily are creative recreations. I see you have a lot of nikee shoes. Air force 1 are classics. They've been around since '82. I'm a fan of blazer lighttops. I see a lot of people with airmax 90s but I like Air max 1s because they are harder to get in good colors. What kind of cologne is that on your counter? That's Kenneth Cole Black, my favourite cologne.

One closet for formal. One closet for informal.

John Owen's Section

Before Ladies like it when you have a clean room.

After

Women like Wounded warriors like this guy

Pickup Line Are you from Tennessee? Because I'm from Oklahoma and those are both U.S. States. Tip on Talking to Women Give them a fake name and tell them you are a state chamption. A John Owen Quote What? Clean my room. I'd rather club baby seals than clean my room. Doing work and working the ladies 5

Life tips and more quotes

Reality TV Sucks -Zach Anderson Don't get used to expensive spirits because you'll lose the ability to enjoy less expensive spirits -Christian Gontarz Giving in this world, living in the next Zach Clark quoting Ned Flanders If she's too good to be true she probably is. -Zach Clark Buy tortillas instead of breadd because they last longer and are more delicious. Pro Tip 1) If you are on a road trip and you've gone one day too long you can extend the life of your shirt by putting deoderant on the pits. Pro Tip 2) If you don't have space to put your detergent, soap, and shampoo just bring shampoo. You can use it to wash your clothes by hand, and to wash your hands and to wash your hair -E.W. Love Friendships over money -Tony Delatorre Tips on Interacting with women As Fr. Derek says when talking to girls just act like Jesus. -Michael Walker If you're truly charming they'll ask you out. -Michael Walker quoting an actor from chariots of fire If you love a woman take her in a dance and tell her I want to make you mine. Directly afterwards bring her to an upscale restaurant in Dallas and shes yours. Disclosure: You must love the woman. Tomb Nelson Say there is something in my eye. Then lock eyes. -Philip Osterman Women like men who play Treasurequest -Joseph Quinlan Things to never give as gifts 1)Clothes 2) Gym membership 3) Perfume -Joseph Quinlan Pickup Lines -Did it hurt when you fell from heaven. Hey girl. Was God showing off when he made you. -Eric Hofbauer Do you believe in love at first sight? Or should I walk back again. -Anonymous Have you been waiting for me because I've been waiting for you. -Anonymous I'm taller than you-Dylan Wadkyo Make sure you bring snacks at halftime -Flames Geyser If you're Indian the PDK is cheap-Rain Man

Hygiene When Lacking a laundry service... Boxers can be worn inside out -Bob Long Boxer briefs can be worn inside out twice as long -Tony Delatorre Shower every day Truett If you're sitting on the jon and the toilet paper is gone be a man use your hand -Nick Catanese Beer tastes best in the shower.-Pete Wash behind the ears.-Pete

Food Tips You can buy cut up chicken from the Mexican foodstore nearby for 3.00. Just put it in the oven with some butter.(see photo above)-John Bascom You could live off of ramen and tuna but I prefer to live off of peanut butter. -Patrick Mangan Did you know Dan Schmidt eats 8000 calories a day? -Paul Johnson "If you cook with bacon you can reuse the pan at least 5 times before washing." -Christian Walker

Life After College

Find something you want to become an expert at. Even if you don't end up in that profession, at least you'll know what you don't want to do.

-Juan Antonio Solares

Sports

Soccer is the gentlemans sport played by barbarians and rugby is a barbarian sport played by gentlemen. -Joseph Quinlan Rugby is a boardgame played by a group of men competing for the ultimate prize.-Mark Toefler. A mustache is always in style -Gjolberg

Gregory Hall

_________________________________

Classifieds
*Film Festival, Some time next month. Make your movie! *Haircuts, Ask Abby Bagby *Office Cleaning, FreshcleanLLC.com a student run cleaning service *Want to make a website, blog, or anything online. Free Tips on Making Websites (undergrads only) ask Raphael Bernardo *Cool UD Souvenirs, Ask Stephen Lopke or Joseph Giollombardo *Food, PDK *Shoe Shining, ask Gunter Barber *Club Donna, this Weekend *Rides to the airport. $20 ask Brian Vallone *Free Spanish, French, and Italian Tutoring at Carpenter Every Day, go there to see schedule *Free Math Tutoring at the Math Lab in the science building *Free Physics Tutoring at the Science Lab *TGIT every Thursday, Dollar Beer from 9:00-10:00
9

*Learn how to Swing Dance. Every Wednesday at the cafeteria 9:00-11:00 *Play Ultimate Frisbee. Check out the UDU facebook page *Do you like to solve mysteries? Treasurehunt for a day with your friends during Treasurequest. Go to the treasurequest facebook page or ask Joseph Quinlan about it. *Running Club. Tuesday and Thursday at 6:30. 1 mile for beginners 3 for advanced. Ask Joe Beatty *Check out facebook.com/udhub *Also check out University of Dallas Unofficial *Udallasnews.com for news *For information on the University of Dallas go to Udallas.edu. It's a good school from what we hear.

*You HERE, post classifieds at facebook.com/udclassifieds to appear here Paid Advertisements (Non UD)
Record your band in Dallas, TX freespiritrecording.com $35/hr. One hour free setup

ray@freespiritrecording.com or 214-352-5436

10

11