Manipulating others is a great way to get what you want whether you want to tric k your boss into

giving you a raise or get your boyfriend to whisk you away on a romantic vacation. Whatever your reason for manipulating someone, if you want t o play your cards right, you have to hone your manipulation skills, try out a va riety of manipulation techniques, and learn how to manipulate people in a variet y of situations. If you want to learn how to manipulate others faster than you c an shed a fake tear, then follow these steps. Edit Steps Hone Your Manipulation Skills 1 Take an acting class. A big part of manipulation is learning how to master y our emotions and make other people receptive to your contrived feelings. If you want to know how to appear more distressed than you really are, or to use a vari ety of other emotional techniques to get your way, then taking an acting class i s a perfect way to improve your powers of persuasion. Don t tell other people that you re taking an acting class if you re only doin g it to learn how to manipulate people. Otherwise they ll grow even more suspiciou s of your tactics. 2 Take a debate or public speaking class. While acting classes can help you ma ster your emotions and convince others that you ll be very distressed if you don t g et what you want, taking a debate or public speaking class will help you learn h ow to convince people to give you what you want in a calm and rational manner. N ot only will you learn to organize and present your thoughts in a more construct ive way, but you ll also learn techniques for making your needs sound very convinc ing. The calm and persuasive method is great for convincing your boss or cowo rkers to do something. Being emotional may not work in a professional setting. 3 Be charismatic. Charismatic people have a natural tendency to get what they want. If you want to manipulate people, then you need to work your charisma. You should be able to smile and light up a room, have approachable body language to make people want to talk to you, and be able to hold up a conversation with abs olutely anyone, from your nine-year-old cousin to your history teacher. Here are some other ways to be charismatic: Make people feel special. Make eye contact when you talk to them, and as k them about their feelings and interests. Show them that you really care about getting to know them even if you don t. Exude confidence. Charismatic people love who they are and what they do. And if you have faith in yourself, then people will be much more likely to take you seriously and to give in to your needs. 4 Learn from the masters. If you have a friend, family member, or even an enem y who is a master manipulator, you should study this person and even take notes to see how he always manages to get what he wants. This will give you new insigh t into how to manipulate people, even if you end up getting tricked in the proce ss. If you re really committed to learning how to manipulate people, then you may even find yourself equipped with the skills to manipulate one of the people you ve been studying. 5 Learn to read people. Every person has a different emotional and psychologic al makeup and is therefore manipulated for different reasons. Before you start p lotting your latest manipulation scheme, take the time to study the person you w ant to manipulate to understand what makes him tick and to see the best approach for getting this person to bend to your needs. Here are some different things y ou may find when you read people:

Many people are susceptible to emotional responses. These people are emo tional themselves, cry at movies, love puppies, and have strong powers of sympat hy and empathy. To get them to do what you want, you ll have to play to their emot ions until they feel sorry for you and give you what you want. Other people have a strong guilt reflex. Some people were raised in a re strictive household where they were punished for doing every little thing wrong and now go through life feeling guilty about everything they do. With these peop le, the answer is obvious make them feel guilty for not giving you what you want u ntil they give in. Some people are more receptive to the rational approach. If your friend is very logically minded, reads the news often, and always needs facts and evide nce before he makes a decision, then you ll have to use your calm persuasive power s to get what you want instead of using your feelings to manipulate him. Use a Variety of Manipulation Techniques 1 Follow an unreasonable request by a more reasonable one. This is time-tested tactic for getting what you really want. It s simple. If you want to manipulate s omeone, you should first make an unreasonable request, wait for the person to re ject you, and then follow it up by a more reasonable request. It will sound much more appealing to your victim in comparison to the first request.[1] For example, if you want your employee to come in early the next day, ju st say, Would you mind leading the new project? You ll just have to come in to work two hours early for the next few months. When your employee shakes his head, jus t say, Oh, all right. But would you mind coming in early tomorrow to help me wrap up this report? He ll be much more receptive after the first request. 2 Make an unusual request before your real request. Another way to ask someone to do something for you is to make an unusual request that throws the person of f guard so much that he can t think to say no. If you ask for the usual request ri ght away money, a ride, help with homework people will be more likely to say no beca use their minds have been conditioned to avoid these tasks. [2] For example, if you want to ask someone on the street to sign a petition , you can first ask that person to help you tie your shoe because you sprained y our back and can t bend down. This will establish a relationship with the person a nd will make him less likely to turn you down when you ask him to sign the petit ion. 3 Inspire fear, then relief. If you want to get what you want, you can first m ake a person fear the worst, be relieved, and then be happy enough to grant you whatever you want. This is a mean little trick but it ll get you results.[3] For example, you could tell your friend, You know, when I was driving you r car, I heard the most terrible noise and was sure that your engine died. But t hen I realized it was just coming from the radio isn t that funny? Pause and wait for your friend to recover before you say, Which reminds me do you mind if I borrow yo ur car again over the weekend? 4 Make the person feel guilty. Guilt is another excellent tactic to getting wh at you want if you re manipulating the right person. First, pick someone who is pr one to feeling guilty already. Then make that person feel like he s being a bad pa rent, friend, or boyfriend for not giving you what you want, no matter how ridic ulous it is.[4] If you want your parent to feel guilty, just make him feel that your lif e or childhood is suffering because he s not letting you have enough experiences. If you want your friend to feel guilty, remind him of all the great thin gs you ve done for her, or casually mention all the times she s let you down. If you want your boyfriend to feel guilty, just say, It s okay I expected thi s, thus making him feel like he always lets you down. 5

Use bribery. Bribery is another great way of getting what you want. You don t have to blackmail someone to use this trick to achieve your goals. You can even bribe someone with a reward that isn t so appealing, or with something that you wo uld do anyway. For example, you can ask your friend for help studying for the ma th test, and offer her a ride to class in exchange, even if you ve given her a rid e before and it s no big deal. Figure out what the person wants and try to give it to her. If your frie nd has a crush on the new guy in school, promise that you ll try to get his number if she does what you want. Don t make it obvious that you re bribing. Just make it seem like you really want to do something nice for that person in return. 6 Play the victim. Playing the victim is a great way to get what you want as l ong as you don t overdo it. This is a great tactic that should be used sparingly, but which will pierce the heart of your victim when done in the right way. Just act like you re a wonderful, altruistic person, and that all of the evil in the un iverse has somehow fallen upon you. Play dumb. Say, I just don t know what I keep doing wrong. Make it sound lik e you re genuinely baffled by why things never work out for you. Say, It s okay I m used to this. Make the person feel guilty, like you re surround ed by people who will never help you out. Be pathetic. If your friend won t give you a ride across town, say, It s okay I l l just walk. I could use the exercise. 7 Use logic. For the rational-minded people in your life, logic is the great p ersuader. Come armed with at least three results-oriented reasons for why the th ing you want would benefit you and even the person you re asking. Talk calmly and rationally as you present your case and don t lose your cool. To reach a rational person, you have to keep emotion out of it or you won t get what you want. Act like what you want is the only logical thing to do. Make the person feel ridiculous for not seeing it your way without saying so. 8 Don t break character. Whatever your method, if your friend, coworker, or sign ificant other calls you out on using a manipulative tactic or for pretending to be more upset than you actually are, don t ever admit that it s true. Instead, look even more hurt and say, I can t believe you would think that, which will make the pe rson feel even more guilty and sorry for you.[5] Once you admit to using manipulative tactics, it will be very hard to ma nipulate the same person again. Manipulate Anyone in Your Life 1 Manipulate your friends. Manipulating your friends can be a bit tricky since they ll know you well enough to call your bluff if your manipulation skills aren t up to par. But don t worry you can still get your friends to do anything you want. First, you have to butter up your friend. The week before you need a big favor, be nice, do small favors for her, and try to mention what a great friend she is . Do whatever you have to do to be a model friend without going overboard. Use your emotions. Your friends care for you, and they won t want to see y ou upset. Use those acting skills to look much more upset than you really are. Remind your friend of what a great friend you are. Be prepared with exam ples of times when you ve done amazing things for the sake of friendship. Lay on the guilt. You don t have to play the bad friend card, but you can ca sually mention some other times that the friend has let you down. Make it sound like you re used to this kind of uncaring behavior from your friend without being too accusatory. 2 Manipulate your significant other. Manipulating your significant other to ge t what you want doesn t have to be hard. The most obvious way to do it is to turn

him on and then ask for the favor, implying that he won t be able to get it on if he doesn t give you what you want. But if you don t want to take this extreme route, there are a number of more subtle ways to manipulate your significant other. Whatever your approach, make sure that you look sexy when you make your request. You ll be more likely to get what you want if your significant other is r eminded of how cute or hot you are. Use your emotions. Does your significant other want to see you crying or being very visibly upset? Of course not. If you really want to get what you want, use the waterworks approach in public. Just as a parent is more likely to give in to a child who is throwing a public tantrum, your man will be more likely to give in if you re crying in public . Use this technique sparingly though. Use small bribes. If you really want your man to take you out on a roman tic picnic, offer to go to the baseball game with him the next day. Then this be comes less like manipulation and more like ordinary compromise. 3 Manipulate your boss. Using the rational and logical approach with your boss will work best. If you show up at your boss s desk crying or talking about your p ersonal problems, you ll be more likely to get fired than to get what you re after. Instead, be logical and firm with your boss, providing concrete reasons for why you need to get what you want. Try to be a model worker on the week before you make your request. Work a little late, keep a big smile on your face, and even bring in bagels or pastri es in the morning just because. Ask in an offhand way. Ask your boss like it s no big deal, and just casua lly make the request instead of saying, There s something really important I wanted to ask you. This will alert him that what you re asking really is a big deal. Try to ask at the end of the day or during a break. Don t talk to your bos s at the beginning of the day, when he s stressed out by all the work he has to do . Instead, ask him when he s about to leave for lunch or go home at the end of the day then he ll be more likely to grant you the request than wasting his free time a rguing with you. 4 Manipulate your teacher. To manipulate your teacher, you have to mix profess ionalism with a bit of emotion. On the day you make your request, you should try to be a model student. Arrive to class early, show that you ve done the reading, and be active and engaged in the classroom. Tell your teacher how great he is without sucking up. Just casually ment ion how inspiring he is or how much you love the subject matter. Mention that a lot of stuff is going on at home. This will make things awk ward and your teacher will feel sorry for you without wanting to know more. As you continue to talk about your personal life, wait for your teacher to get uncomfortable and offer to give you an extension or to let you rewrite yo ur paper. If this doesn t happen, start in the negative. Say, I know you don t normal ly give extensions and let your voice trail off as your eyes get misty and you loo k out the window longingly. If this still doesn t work, go for the heartstrings. Start crying while be ing mysterious about the stuff going on at home and wait for your teacher to get s o uncomfortable that he has no choice but to give you what you want. 5 Manipulate your parents. Your parents are supposed to love you unconditional ly and are therefore already a lot more susceptible to manipulation. If you have a baseline of love and support, then all you have to do is be a model offspring for a while before you make your request. Don t miss your curfew, spend time stud ying, and help out around the house as much as you can. Then, go in for the kill . State your request like it s perfectly reasonable. If you want to go to a concert on a school night, casually ask in an offhand way instead of sitting dow n to have a big talk about it. Make it look like you couldn t possibly see why you r parents would say no.

You can even try asking while you re folding laundry or doing the dishes. This will remind your parents of what a great son or daughter you really are. Talk about how all of your friends are doing this thing, and how their p arents are okay with it. Don t make this a big deal. Make your parents feel guilty. If you wanted to go to a concert, just sa y, It s no big deal. I ll just get my friends to get me a t-shirt or something after the show. Make them feel like they re really making you miss out on a major social or another type of experience. Don t say, You re ruining my life! If you play your car ds right, they ll reach that conclusion on their own.