Most of the time

Often

Sometimes

Rarely

Almost never

1
1. 2. 3. 4. 5. I can detect the mood of others by looking at them as we converse. I tend to do most of the talking in conversations. I am able to resolve problems without losing control of my emotions. I find it easy to see things from someone else's point of view. When talking to people, I pay attention to their body language (ex. facial expression, hand movement, etc.). 6. 7. 8. 9. I find myself struggling to find the right words that will clearly express what I want to say. When I am angry, I admit it. I can tell when someone doesn't understand what I'm saying. I am completely at ease when a conversation shifts to the topic of feelings.

10. I manage to express my ideas clearly. 11. When I talk to someone, I put myself in his or her shoes. Quite Often Often Sometimes Rarely Almost Never

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12. 13. 14. 15. 16. 17. 18. 19. 20. I get so caught up in what I have to say that I am unaware of the reactions of my listeners. When I know what someone is going to say, I finish the sentence for him or her. I tend to misinterpret peoples words. I have difficulty putting my thoughts into words. Emotionally charged situations make me uncomfortable. People don't get what I am saying. I fidget (e.g. play with hair, watch, pen) while listening to someone talking. I find it hard to express my feelings to others. People tend to misinterpret what I say.

Completely true

Mostly true

Somewhat Mostly Completely true/false false false

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21. 22. 23. 24. 25. 26. 27. I tend to postpone or avoid discussing touchy topics. I have to repeat myself often because people don't understand my message the first time around. If I dont understand someones explanation the first time around, I feel stupid asking for clarification. I am able to confront someone who has hurt my feelings. I tend to clam up when dealing with someone I find intimidating. I find it difficult to understand people when they dont have the same point of view as I do. I change the way I talk depending on who Im speaking (e.g. speak more clearly with someone whose first language isnt English; speak more professionally when in a meeting at work, etc.). 28. 29. I express my opinions, even if others disagree with me. I believe that the best way to help others understand me is to be completely open about my feelings.

Completely true

Mostly true

Somewhat Mostly Completely true/false false false

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30. 31. 32. 33. 34. 35. 36. 37. 38. If I have something relevant to add, I'll interrupt someone to make certain my views are heard. When other people become emotional around me, Im not sure how to react. People complain that I don't appear to be listening when they speak to me. If I find a conversation boring, Ill let my mind drift away. I am uncomfortable if Im not leading the conversation (e.g. choosing the topic, controlling the pace). I will stop a speaker in mid-sentence if I disagree with a statement he or she has made. I try to divert or end conversations that don't interest me. Im better off hiding my weaknesses so that no one will use them against me. I find it difficult to express my opinions when others don't share them.

Assertiveness
Often Sometimes Rarely

Most of the time

Almost never

1
1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. I find it difficult to take a compliment. I prefer not to criticize others, even if I am sure they are wrong. I find it hard to tell someone that I have romantic feelings for him or her. Im not comfortable asking my boss for a raise, even if I think I deserve it. I avoid dealing with difficult situations involving confrontation. I tend to be the leader in a group of friends. I feel people take advantage of me. Talking to people in positions of authority makes me feel nervous, self-conscious, or unsure of myself. I behave in a self-confident manner. with me.

10. I express my opinions, even if others in the group disagree

Most of the time

Often

Sometimes

Rarely

Almost never

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11. I feel awkward paying someone a compliment. 12. I am able to speak openly about my feelings. 13. I feel threatened when dealing with someone who is very assertive. 14. If I am not satisfied with the service in a restaurant, I let the waiter know. 15. I feel free to politely voice my disagreement with someone in a position of authority. 16. Opinionated people make me feel uncomfortable. 17. I put the needs of others ahead of my own needs. 18. When an argument is over, I replay the situation in my head, thinking of all the things I could have said, regretting that I hadn't thought of them then, or wishing I had the guts to say them.

19. I fear making phone calls to institutions, government agencies or businesses, because I might sound stupid if I don't understand the instructions. 20. If my neighbors made too much noise, I would let them know.

Often Most of the time

Sometimes Rarely Almost never

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21. 22. 23. 24. 25. 26. I feel comfortable saying "no" to people. When I go out with other people, I'll do what they suggest, even if I feel like doing something else. I am able to express my anger or frustration with a friend or partner if I think it's justified. Instead of arguing, I tend to accept responsibility for other people's mistakes. I tend to just go along with what everyone else wants, instead of stating my own desires. If a friend woke me up late at night with an unimportant phone call, I would say that I was already sleeping and prefer not to be called that late. 27. 28. 29. 30. I tend to be speechless when I am left alone with a person I find attractive. When a friend borrows something from me and forgets to return it, I feel comfortable reminding her or him. I will use intimidation to ensure that I get my way. I have been known to lose my temper and swear at people.