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A radio station was running a competition words that werent in the dictionary yet could still be used in a sentence

e that would make logical sense. The prize was a trip to Bali. RJ: 96 FM here, whats your name? Caller: Hi, my names Dave. RJ: Dave, whats your word? Caller: Goan... spelt G-O-A-N pronounced go-an. RJ: You are correct, Dave, goan is not in the dictionary. Now, for a trip to Bali: What sentence can you use that word in that would make sense? Caller: Goan fuck yourself! [The RJ cut the caller off and took other calls, all unsuccessful until... ] RJ: 96 FM, whats your name? Caller: Hi, me names Jeff. RJ: Jeff, whats your word? Caller: Smee, spelt S-M-E-E, pronounced smee. RJ: You are correct, Jeff, smee is not in the dictionary. Now, for a trip to Bali: What sentence can you use that word in that would make sense? Caller: Smee again! Goan fuck yourself!? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA

Josh lusted after Linda. When she finally agreed to go out with him, he took her out to dinner and then afterwards, drove her five miles out into the country, parked, and said passionately, "I want you right here, right now. Do it... or you can walk home!" Without saying a word, Linda got out of the car and walked home. A month later, after much apologising, Linda agreed to go out with Josh again. This time he drove ten miles out in the country, parked, and begged, "Please. I must make love to you right now. Do it... or walk home!" Again, Linda walked home. Two months later, after even more apologising and gifts of flowers and jewellery, she accepted another invitation. This time, just to make sure, Josh drove fifty miles out of town and gave her the same ultimatum. Without a word, Linda undressed and gave him the greatest sex of his young life. As they were driving home, Josh asked, "Why did you walk home the first two dates, when you so obviously

enjoy sex?" Linda answered, "Well, it's like this: I'll walk five miles or even ten miles to save a friend from AIDS, but fifty..."

Ek Indian aur Ek American dono dost the, . . Dono ek din ek chocolate store me gaye. Waha sab logo ko busy dekhkar American ne 3 chocolate chura li, Jab dono bahar aaye to American bola :-"Man I m the best thief ever, I stole 3 chocolates and no one saw me, u cant beat that" . Indian replied:"You wanna see something better, lets go back to the shop and I will show you real stealing" So they went to the counter and Indian said to the Shop boy :"Do you wanna see magic....?? "Shop boy replied:"Yes." Indian said:"Give me one chocolate bar." The shop boy gave him one, and he ate it. He asked for the second, and he ate that as well. He asked for the third, and finished that one too. The shop boy asked:"But where is the magic....?? . . Indian replied:"Check in my friends pocket, and you ll find them.":P :D :D U can't beat an Indian :P :D:D:-P

18+ . . . . . . . . . . . Bachon k *Masoom Sawal* Or Techer la Jawab PAPPU Teacher se: Miss 'BUS'MALE he ya FEMALE? (Teacher Sochne Lagi) Ek bacha: Teacher ye Female he 2nd bacha: Wo Kese 3rd bacha: Qun k Sb Log Us Pr Charhty Hen (Teacher Pareshaan) 4th bacha Agr Bus FEMALE Hy or Sb Us Pr Charhtay Hen To Us k Bachay Qun nahi hote? (Teacher Zyda Preshan) 5th bach: Is Liye k Sb Us Pr Pechay Se Charhty Hen (Teacher Sharam se pani pani) 6th:Mana k Sbhi Pechay Se Charhty Hen Lekin Driver To Agy Se Charhta He Na? Phr Bachay Q Ni Hoty? (Teacher Ki Saans Bannd)

Pappu: Qu K Wo Topi Pehan k Charhta He *TEACHER BEYHOSH*!

It's the killing one must read - 4 friends meet 30 years after school. One goes to the toilet while the other 3 start to talk about how successful their sons became. No. 1 says his son studied economics, became a banker and is so rich he gave his best friend a ferrari. No. 2 said his son became a pilot, started his own airline, became so rich he gave his best friend a jet. No. 3 said his son became an engineer, started his own development company, became so rich he build his best friend a castle. No 4. came back from toilet and asks what the buzz is about. They told him they were talking about how successfull their sons became and ask him about his son. He said his son is gay and is a Stripper at a Gay bar. Other 3 said he must be very disappointed with his son for not becoming successful. " O no !! " said the father, he is doing good. " Last week was his birthday and he got a ferrari, a jet and a castle from 3 of his boyfriends...

The nightmare birthday gift Wife treats Hubby (jim) by taking him to a strip club for his b'day.. At the club Doorman: Hey Jim! How are you? Wife: How does he know you? Jim: We play Golf! Barman: The usual beer Jim? Wife: and how does he know you? Jim: He's on the Darts Team! Lap Dancer: The special again, Jim? The Wife storms out dragging Jim with her&jumps into a taxi.!

Driver: Hey Jimmy boy.. You picked an ugly one this time...Same Hotel ?

A store that sells New Husbands has opened in New York City, where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates: You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the value of the products increases as the shopper ascends the flights. The shopper may choose any item from a particular floor, or may choose to go up to the next floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building! So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. On the first floor the sign on the door reads: Floor 1 - These men Have Jobs She is intrigued, but continues to the second floor, where the sign reads: Floor 2 - These men Have Jobs and Love Kids. 'That's nice,' she thinks, 'but I want more.' So she continues upward. The third floor sign reads: Floor 3 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, and are Extremely Good Looking. 'Wow,' she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going. She goes to the fourth floor and the sign reads: Floor 4 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Good Looking and Help with Housework. 'Oh, mercy me!' she exclaims, 'I can hardly stand it!' Still, she goes to the fifth floor and the sign reads: Floor 5 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous, Help with Housework, and Have a Strong Romantic Streak. She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor, where the sign reads: Floor 6 - You are visitor number 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please!!! Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store. (scroll and keep reading!) PLEASE NOTE: the store's owner opened a New Wives Store

just across the street. The 1st Floor has wives that listen to men. The 2nd, 3rd, 4th,5th and 6th floor have never been visited by men

Pappu Train Mein Safar Kar Raha Tha. Usne Samne Khade Aadmi Ki Jeb Mein Haath Dala. Aadmi Ne Ye Dekha Aur Gusse Se Chilla Kar Bola Aadmi: Tumne Meri Jeb Mein Haath Kyun Dala? Pappu Muskurate Hue: Mujhe Machis Chahiye Thi, Isliye Aadmi Hairani Se: Abe Par, Tum Mujhse Mang Bhi To Sakte The Na Pappu: Par Main Ajnabiyo Se Baat Nahi Karta :D :P

A skinny little guy goes into an elevator, looks up and sees this HUGE guy standing next to him. The big guy sees the little guy staring at him, looks down and says: 7 feet tall, 350 pounds, 20 inch private, 3 pound testicles, Turner Brown. The little guy faints and falls to the floor. The big guy kneels down and starts shaking him. The big guy says, What's wrong with you? In a weak voice the little guy says, What EXACTLY did you say to me? The big dude says, I saw your curious look and figured I'd just give you the answers to the questions everyone always asks me..... I'm 7 feet tall, I weigh 350 pounds, I have a 20 inch private, my testicles weigh 3 pounds each, and my name is Turner Brown. The small guy says, Turner Brown?! Sweet Jesus, I thought you said, 'Turn around!":)

18+ . . . . . . . .

. . . . . Bf- Texting to his gf. Hey baby..what's up.? Gf- Nothing much just washing my BOOBS. Bf- What.! :O Gf- Yeah. It has become very dirty. People keep stepping on it a lot. Bf- What the hell.. :@ Gf- Why..?? Oh fish..!! Sorry baby I meant. BOOTS. Damn this Automatic dictionary is on.! :P :D

The love story of Ron and Edna. Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have. Ron and Edna were both patients in a mental hospital. One day while they were walking past the hospital swimming pool. Ron suddenly jumped into the deep end. He sank to the bottom of the pool and stayed there. Edna promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled him out. When the Head Nurse Director became aware of Edna heroic act she immediately ordered her to be discharged from the hospital, as she now considered her to be mentally stable. When she went to tell Edna the news she said, 'Edna, I have good news and bad news. The good news is you're being discharged, since you were able to rationally respond to a crisis by jumping in and saving the life of the person you love. I have concluded that your act displays sound mindedness. The bad news is, Ron hung himself in the bathroom with his bathrobe belt right after you saved him. I am so sorry, but he's dead.'

Edna replied (you'll love this) . .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. . .. , 'He didn't hang himself, I put him there to dry. How soon can I go home?'

A judge was interviewing a woman regarding her pending divorce, and asked, What are the grounds for your divorce? She replied, About four acres and a nice little home in the middle of the property with a stream running by. No, he said, I mean what is the foundation of this case? It is made of concrete, brick and mortar, she responded. I mean, he continued, What are your relations like? I have an aunt and uncle living here in town, and so do my husbands parents. He said, Do you have a real grudge? No, she replied, We have a two-car carport and have never really needed one. Please, he tried again, is there any infidelity in your marriage? Yes, both my son and daughter have stereo sets. We dont necessarily like the music, but the answer to your questions is yes. Maam, does your husband ever beat you up? Yes, she responded, about twice a week he gets up earlier than I do. Finally, in frustration, the judge asked, Lady, why do you want a divorce?

Oh, I dont want a divorce, she replied. Ive never wanted a divorce. My husband does. He said he cant communicate with me! :P :D :D

18+ . . . . . . . . . . A Secretary Got An Expensive Pen As Birthday Gift From His Boss. She Sent His Boss A Thank You Note Via E-Mail. But, Her Bosss Wife Read The Note And Filed A Divorce. The Note Was Your Penis Wonderful, I Enjoyed Using It Last Night. It Has Extra-Ordinarily Smooth Flow And Firm Strokes. Initially Its Tip Was To Be Licked To Bring It In Working Order And Then It Was Equally On Both Sides. I Loved Its Perfect Size And Grip. I Felt As In Heavens Using It. I Had Always Desired It And Fulfilled My Wish. At Last It Is Mine And Only Mine, Forever. Thanks A Lot. Moral: Space Is An Essential Part Of English.