KP 1 KP Stacie Weatbrook ENG 2010 October 22, 2013 FAMILY MEALTIME What if I told you there is a nearly foolproof

way to decrease underage drinking, drug abuse, obesity, and increase your childs ability to succeed in life? Andbetter yetwhat if I told you there is no additional cost of this magic bullet and it might even save you money? Interested? Eating meals together as a family can help do this and even more. In Assistant Professor Larry Forthuns document, Family Nutrition: The Truth about Family Meals, he quotes author Miriam Weinstein regarding the family meal as a magic bulletsomething that would improve the quality of your daily life, your childrens chances of success in the world, [and] your familys health ... (1). Research and studies show families who eat meals together have better adjusted children, are more likely to eat healthier foods, less likely to be overweight, less likely to engage in disordered eating, less likely to abuse alcohol or other drugs, and youth exhibit lower depressive symptoms (Cook et al 2; Forthun 1). Studies have shown eating meals together three or more days a week may have the most positive results for children (Cook et al 3). I conducted a survey of 50 people, twenty-eight college students and professors at Salt Lake Community College and twenty-two individuals at Harmons grocery store. This survey revealed 74% of families eat three or more meals together

per week (Figure 1). These results were comparable to those of a national survey in 2007 where approximately 77% of children and youth reported that they eat meals with their families four or more times per week (Forthun, 1). There were 86% of individuals I surveyed who believe

KP 2 family mealtime strengthens their family while 2% did not, and 12% were unsure. Just think what a difference it would make in the lives of children everywhere if all families made the effort to sit down together for mealtimes just three times a week or more!

SURVEY OF 50 PEOPLE
40 Percent 30 20 10 0 7 or 5-6 1-2 more times 3-4 times times Never

Family Meals Eaten Together Weekly

Figure 1

In an article by Eliza Cook and Rachel Dunifon entitled, Do Family Meals Really Make a Difference? they acknowledge the challenges researchers face when trying to analyze the implications of family meals because it is hard to separate the effects of family meals from other factors in the family environment (1). They admit research on family mealtimes is still evolving and it is challenging for researchers to identify the true effects of family meals (3). They add that there is evidence to date that family mealtimes influence young people in a positive way (3).

KP 3 Stronger family bonds are created by sharing family mealtimes. In his commentary entitled, The Importance of the Family Dinner, Psychiatrist Gregory K. Fritz shares the benefits of communication: Talking, connecting, sharing their lives is as crucial to sustaining a family as is food, and during a family dinner they occur together (8). He goes on to say, family dinners allow all the members of the family to be involved in each others livesChildren develop the ability to express their opinions, to listen carefully to others in the family, to solicit advice, and to take pride in describing their accomplishments to their family (1). Fritz does make the point that just having family mealtime regularly do[es] not guarantee a successful family dinner, especially early on (8). He emphasizes the need for parents to take the lead in finding positive conversation topics (8). Some of the suggestions he makes for those conversation topics include, Whats the best thing that happened to everyone today? as well as, If you could be anyone else in the world, who would it be? (8). Fritz stresses the importance of giving everyone a turn to speak (8). In a study entitled, Routine and Ritual Elements in Family Mealtimes: Contexts for Child Well-Being and Family Identity, Professor Barbara H. Fiese, et al. show that a sense of group cohesiveness is formed when there is a commitment to family mealtime (Fiese et al 80). They go on to say that family mealtime provides an opportunity for validation of emotions and assurance that others share concern about your feelings (80). According to their research, this helps children be less likely to experience internalizing symptoms (80). Continuity is another part of the study focus by Fiese and others. They examine the ritual continuity of family mealtimes and find that two or more generations generally participate,

KP 4 passing ritual practices along (81). They say, The symbolism behind these practices offers continuity of meaning across generations, affecting beliefs about family relationships (81). Family mealtime provides learning opportunities. You have an opportune setting to teach social skills; table manners; communication skills; and ethnic, cultural or religious heritage of your family. Forthun states, What the family eats, how they eat, and when they eat reflects cultural identity. As children participate in these cultural traditions, they begin to learn more about their heritage and their familys history (2). Forthun then cites a study from Emory University which found, children who knew a lot about their family history, through family meals and other interactions, had a closer relationship to family members, higher self-esteem, and a greater sense of control over their own lives (2). Even with all this positive information on family mealtime, it remains a challenge to gather everyone around the kitchen table. Families are busy. Coordinating work schedules, home life, school, childrens afterschool sports and/or lessons, outside activities, homework, church and civic responsibilities, meetings, and technology, all contribute to the challenge. While it is not easy with the demands on todays families, Fritz urge[s] his patients to make it a priority to eat together (8). Forthun shares ideas on ways to make family mealtime work. He encourages family members to make it a priority and schedule their time to be together for meals (2). It may be necessary to simplify and let some activities go. If something is important to someone, they make time for it. Letting children help choose what to fix and help in meal preparation makes it fun as well as educational. Skills can be learned that will empower them as they venture out on their own.

KP 5 Sharing in the work teaches them responsibility and organizational skills. It also creates a sense of belonging. Forthun states the importance of keeping a sense of humor at the kitchen table (3). Some families share jokes and other light-hearted stories when they share mealtimes. The phrase, Dont cry over spilt milk, is applicable here. Happy memories will be made that will last for generations. Eliminating distractions is helpful in making the most of family mealtimes according to Forthun (3). Turning off the television, stereo, telephones, and cell phones all contribute to an environment more conducive to conversation and bonding. It also helps members feel valued. I have heard of families having a basket for members to put their cell phones or other electronic devises in before they come to the kitchen table. By making it a practice that everyone follows, even the parents, keeping outside distractions at bay will help keep family mealtime at its optimum environment. Forthun advises working to keep conversations positive or on neutral topics (3). He says, Do not let the conversation get out of hand and allow family members to criticize one another (3). Forthun talks about the importance of setting a good example in conversations as well as in manners at the table and good etiquette (3). Eating slowly and taking time to enjoy spending time together are also important. He emphasizes focusing on the family, not the food (3). Forthun concludes, Although there is no guarantee that eating together as a family will resolve all family problems, it may provide the opportunity to make a fresh start (2). Also, Fritz notes a recurring infrequency of family mealtimes in the families of children he sees and believes regular family mealtimes are the best preventative approach to improving child mental health (8).

KP 6 Some of my favorite memories are associated with family mealtimes. I grew up in a family where my mother prepared well-balanced meals, three times a day. Our family gathered together to share meals, conversation, and companionship. Not every meal would be considered a success when measuring it to the standards of a successful mealtime experience, but we learned from those as well. I believe it helped strengthen our family and benefited us as children in ways that researchers are now finding. Although times have changed from when I was a child, I am trying to carry on the family mealtime tradition in my own family and hope to instill the importance of it in my own children. I want my grandchildren to benefit from family mealtime as well as their children, and so on. May the tradition and benefits continue for everyone.

KP 7 WORKS CITED Cook, Eliza, and Rachel Dunifon. Do Family Meals Really Make a Difference? Parenting in Context. (2012):1-7. Web. 11 Sept. 2013. Fiese, Barbara H., Kimberly P. Foley, and Mary Spagnola. Routine and Ritual Elements in Family Mealtimes: Contexts for Child Well-Being and Family Identity. New Directions for Child & Adolescent Development 2006.111 (2006): 67-89. Academic Search Premier. Web. 13 Sept. 2013. Forthun, Larry. Family Nutrition: The Truth About Family Meals. EDIS. (2012):1-4. Web. 10 Sept. 2013. Fritz, Gregory K. The Importance of the Family Dinner. Brown University Child & Adolescent Behavior Letter Feb. 2006: 8. Academic Search Premier. Web. 6 Sept. 2013.