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TRANSLATION RUN AMUCK World travelers discovered these contortions of the English language. A solace for overworked copywriters!!!!

As any traveler knows, communication in foreign countries can take some humorous turns through translation. Here are some signs and notices written in English that were spied around the world by corporate travelers. You have to give the writers and E! for Effort! En"oy! #n a $openhagen airline ticket office% We take your bags and send them in all directions. #n a &aris hotel elevator% &lease leave your values at the front desk. #n a 'ucharest hotel lobby% (he lift is being fi)ed for the ne)t day. *uring that time we regret that you will be unbearable. A sing posted in +ermany,s 'lack -orest% #t is strictly forbidden on our black forest camping site that people of different se), for instance, men and women, live together in one tent unless they are married with eac".h other for that purpose. /n the menu of a 0wiss restaurant% /ur wines leave you nothing to hope for. #n a 1eip2ig elevator% *o not enter lift backward, and only when lit up. #n a 'elgrade hotel elevator% (o move the cabin, push the button for wishing floor. #f the cabin should enter more persons, each one should press a number of wishing floor. *riving is then going alphabetically by national order. #n a hotel in Athens% 3isitors are e)pected to complain at the office between the hours of 4 and 55 a.m. daily. #n a Yugoslavian hotel% (he flattening of underwear with pleasure is the "ob of the chambermaid. #n a 6hodes tailor shop% /rder your summer,s suit. 'ecause is big rush we will e)ecute customers in strict rotation.

-rom a brochure of a car rental firm in (okyo% When a passenger of foot heave in sight, tootle the horn. (rumpet him melodiously at first, but if he still obstacles your passage then tootle him with vigor. #n a 7apanese hotel% You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid. -rom a 7apanese information booklet about using a hotel air conditioner% $ooles and Heates% #f you want "ust condition of warm in your room, please control yourself. #n the lobby of a 8oscow hotel across from a 6ussian orthodo) monastery% You are welcome to visit the cemetery where famous 6ussian and soviet composers, artists and writers are buried daily e)cept (hursday. #n a (okyo hotel% #s forbidden to steal hotel towels please. #f you are not a person to do such a thing is please not to read notis. #n a 0wiss mountain inn% 0pecial today 9 no ice cream. #n a 6ome laundry% 1adies, leave your clothes here and spend the afternoon having a good time. /utside a Hong :ong tailor shop% 1adies may have a fit upstairs. #n a 'udapest 2oo% &lease do not feed the animals. #f you have any suitable food, give it to the guard on duty. #n the office of a 6oman doctor% 0pecialist in women and other diseases. #n an Austrian hotel catering to skiers% ;ot to perambulate the corridors during the hours of repose in the boots of ascension. /n the menu of a &olish hotel% 0alad a firm,s own make< limpid red beet soup with cheesy dumplings in the form of a finger< roasted duck let loose< beef rashers beaten up in the country people,s fashion. #n a 'angkok dry cleaners% *rop your trousers here for best results. /utside a &aris dress shop% *resses for street walking.

#n a (okyo bar% 0pecial cocktails for the ladies with nuts. -rom the 0oviet weekly% (here will be a 8oscow e)hibition of Arts by 5=>,>>> 0oviet 6epublic painters and sculptors. (hese were e)ecuted over the past two years. #n an advertisement by a Hong :ong dentist% (eeth e)tracted by the latest 8ethodists. #n a ?urich hotel% 'ecause of the impropriety of entertaining guests of the opposite se) in the bedroom, it is suggested that the lobby be used for this purpose. #n a $2echoslovakian tourist agency% (ake one of our horse@driven city tours. We guarantee no miscarriages. Advertisement for donkey rides in (hailand% Would you like to ride on your own assA #n a 'angkok temple% #t is forbidden to enter a women even a foreigner if dressed as a man. /n the door of a 8oscow hotel room% #f this is your first visit to the B600, you are welcome to it. #n a ;orwegian cocktail lounge% 1adies are reCuested not to have children in a bar. #n an Acapulco hotel% (e manager has personally passed all the water served here. #n a (okyo shop% /ur nylons cost more than common, but you,ll find they are the best in the long run. (wo signs from a 8a"orcan shop entrance% English well speaking. Here speeching American.

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