Mercedes Fernandez 11/18/2013 English 1103-006 Professor Wray

When you are bilingual, there are two separate worlds: the language you were born with and the language you grew to learn. I believe a lot of bilingual individuals agree when I say family has the biggest impact and influence on a person. There is a separate world from home to the public, family to friends, and native tongue to establishing a new one. But is there really such a thing as a new tongue? In my case, I was raised with Spanish as my native language and English as learning one. For about a quarter of my life, Spanish and English were two separate worlds I was a part of. It was difficult for me to juggle both languages at home and the social world. However, I progressively became in sync with both that I developed Spanglish or Spanish-English into my daily living, a language of my own. I became curious as I further became accustomed to the English language and the customs with it. For the past couple of years I have questioned: has English strayed me from my roots? With any foreign language, there is a whole other culture and customs that comes with it. With Spanish being so broad, it varies from different parts of the world. Mexicos customs are different from South American countries or the Spanish-speaking islands in the Caribbean like Puerto Rico or Dominican Republic. I did not realize this as I was going through my research in my speech community. In America, I believed all Latinos came from common ground when it came to family principles. For example, in one of my wikipages there was an article that had a survey that about 40% of people with Hispanic/Latino origin do not believe they share the same values as Hispanics/Latinos from different countries living here in the U.S. I was raised in a traditional family with the motto; family first so it came as a surprise as other Latinos did not feel the same way because we are very family-oriented. I found that this difference was not shared in Spanish-English communities as well. Through my daybook writings I wrote about

Mercedes Fernandez 11/18/2013 English 1103-006 Professor Wray

what family meant to me and how that tied in with my Spanglish. I compared it to research I discovered through my Wiki Readers Guide in the next following paragraphs. I initially wrote in my daybook how it felt as though no one could relate to my lack of identity I felt from the divide between both words, not just through language but in culture and customs as well. As a kid, I hardly spoke any English. I did not go into day care or pre-school but straight into kindergarten. I remember struggling saying the Pledge of Allegiance until third grade. I was always at home with my family. No one knew but a little English to get by in my family, so we spoke in Spanish all the time. I was not the most social child in elementary school, but with great ESL teachers I felt I grasped the English language remarkably well by seventh grade. I began to hang out after school with my new friends. I became more comfortable and got out of my shell. I listened to all the popular songs on the radio and could understand what they were saying (some more appropriate than others), and it felt like I finally belonged. Slowly but surely I started to incorporate a lot of the English language in my house. I would come home and start speaking Spanish with a blend of English. I would use cool or awesome or hang out and at first it was confusing to my parents but they saw humor in it more than anything. I would like to think bringing the English language in my home helped my parents learn it as well. When going further into my research about Spanglish, I looked for people who could relate to me when it came to balancing both languages. Through my Wiki Readers Guide, I found an article by a woman who fluently spoke in Spanglish. Like me, she had difficulty being a part of just one world. English became more and more of a common language for her, but family was important to her and she spoke Spanish at home. However, with making English her first language she struggled with people who spoke Spanish as their only language. I could relate

Mercedes Fernandez 11/18/2013 English 1103-006 Professor Wray

because whenever I speak to my outside relatives I cannot find the exact word I am trying to say in Spanish and end up blending both languages. It confuses them, but they learned to see I still am a part of the Spanish-speaking world to them. The author wrote Nunca hay donde parquear (There's never anywhere to park), which happens all the time when I am going out with my family or relatives. I used to be ashamed and embarrassed that I was losing my touch with what was my mother tongue. I slowly realized that if I am still willingly speaking Spanish then I should not have to push myself to impress anyone. In my video capture I created a scene where my mom is cooking and I am asking what we are having for dinner. My mom and I were supposed to act out the scene but my mom suddenly went into her own little skit of her own and we were having a conversation as if no one was filming. Right when the video starts, I call her Mami, which is Spanglish for blending mama and mommy. She acknowledges me with mija which translates to daughter of mine. The video was meant to capture how overtime I have brought English into my home and how it has affected my parents. My mother has a better grasp of the language and you utilizes it when she goes to work and speaks to her employees. My dad who made a cameo at the end of the video, speaks more fluidly than my mother. He understands a lot more than he lets on and he thanks me once in the blue moon for helping him and my mom speak English. It put me in a rare role as a parent. I had the role to educate my parents as though they were students just now learning a new subject, which in this case was the English language. It feels good knowing the beginnings of hanging out with my friends or that new phone is so cool has further developed into a better grasp of the English in my family.

Mercedes Fernandez 11/18/2013 English 1103-006 Professor Wray

After all my research, I realized I have not strayed from my roots. When I came across how real people live with Spanglish it does not make me any less proud of my native Spanish language. I learned to coexist in both worlds and form my own tongue. It is comforting to know there are other people like me who understand where I am coming from. They believe in a lot of family values and how their background culture makes them authentic into an Englishspeaking society. I learned that I have the best of both worlds and to embrace both languages as one.