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Damian Castillo Professor Susan Lago ENG-110 College Writing 15 December, 2013

Aspergers In My Life

Waking up every morning around six or seven has become a routine for me and my brother. However, just because it is a routine for us, doesnt mean that we enjoy waking up at that time. My younger brother, Angel, has Aspergers Syndrome, as well as myself. Aspergers Syndrome in a nutshell is in the high functioning area on the Autism spectrum. This leads to difficulty interacting socially, strange behaviors, difficulty communicating feelings with other people, and intense interest in certain subjects or topics. We are both affected by this at different levels. Since I have a low level of Aspergers, I exhibit fewer symptoms than my brother -- such as intense interest in things I happen across, and some difficulty interacting and communicating thoughts and feelings. My brother has a higher level and displays the same symptoms as me and more, he has trouble interacting with people and finds different ways to hide who he is in an attempt to find a place in his social life. Communicating with him and trying to build a relationship has been difficult, but over the years I have learned how to interact with him so he is comfortable at home. In the past, we have been to several therapists to try and help us live with our Aspergers. Considering the process of diagnosis, there is a lot of communication required in order to understand the relationships of the patient with their friends and family. Since my brother was

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diagnosed at a young age, we all had to work with him and help him understand basic concepts, like what was right or wrong and what was or wasn't okay to do. He wasnt able to control his temperament very well as a cause of Aspergers. Paula states that Formal diagnosis of any mental disorder relies on a description of what is observable, of how the person presents as we look from the outside(Paula13). In the book Asperger Syndrome and Psychotherapy : Understanding Asperger Perspectives, the author speaks about how the diagnosis is done and how we can better understand the afflicted with Aspergers. Simply paying attention to who they are instead of just treating them as a special person with a mental illness, might be a more effective way to help increase our understanding of them better and teach them to interact with others. (Paula) Common mistakes that people with Aspergers can make is their amount of trust in people, and often misplacing it in the wrong people. Sadly many people with Aspergers can be manipulated for many different reasons. They can be manipulated so easily because of their yearning and need to make friends to create their social life. They strongly believe that doing things for others can help them make friends. While their hope for making friends is important, we also need to learn how to communicate with them in order to teach them to not trust everyone. Some people might just be out to hurt them instead of being their friends. The relationships they choose to make can sometimes not always be the wisest choices for them. It is also important that they understand the intentions of the person trying to communicate with them and why they are trying to do so. My brother had a friend in elementary school that my mother and I didnt like very much because he had a bad attitude and was a serious kleptomaniac. He had stolen phones, toys, and other things from my brother, but they

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were still friends because Angel trusted him. These types of harmful relationships are why we have to be careful with how we communicate with them. Creating an environment for a person with Aspergers is usually called creating an umbrella for them. This is meant to protect them from things that may alter their emotions or create a form of chaos in their mind. People without Aspergers, or any knowledge about Aspergers may not understand this. When a child is in an environment that is uneasy to them they may react by saying they are in pain. In the book, Communication Issues, Olga, the author uses the example of a broken arm. Imagine youre a child with a broken arm and in excruciating pain, then you hear sirens of an ambulance coming your way. Some people will think of this as a relief because help has arrived, but to someone with Aspergers they might react with more pain and distress because the noise will be confusing to them. They wont be able to focus on one thing, and having more than one thing happening at once may alarm them. We create that umbrella to keep them safe from these possible things that could happen.(Olga 211) When people think of someone with Autism or Asperger's, they dont take the time to listen and understand them. That is the problem we are having now with people who dont know about Aspergers. With it being around me my whole life, from myself to my little brother. I have been able to understand why my brother acts a certain way compared to how I may act or another person who doesn't have Aspergers. When my brother was being diagnosed for Aspergers, he had to go through many test and exams to find out what was wrong with him and the level of Aspergers he had. He went to different schools and systems, while he was going through all of this, I was attending normal schools with normal classes. We were both raised differently because his case of Aspergers was more severe than mine was. He would act out aggressively and never focus in class or at home.

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My mother began to treat us differently after she had my brother diagnosed. She took more time to listen to him and understand why he would react a certain way to something, rather than being calm and thinking through something for a solution of her own. The doctors she spoke to and visited for my brother have also recommended medication to help keep my brother calm and focused, but she refused them all. She strongly believed that she could raise him even with his symptoms to be able to focus, and effectively work just like anyone else could. The reason I added this bit to my paper, was to show you what a colossal difference it can make to give someone with Aspergers a chance, and try to understand them and work with them on the same level. My mother has had a lot of trouble with my little brother, it actually makes me laugh a little, but she never gave up on him. After almost 17 years with my brother, he has actually been able to change his behavior and work toward being better person for himself. I can honestly say Im deeply proud of him. He is by far a better student than I am at the current moment, and this is all because my mother took the time to understand him and learn his language and way of thinking. Some people might ask, so what? Why is it important that we understand people with Aspergers? In Alec Millers book about suicide, about 100,000 suicides worldwide are committed by the adolescents of this world. Studies show that 80-90% of those who had committed suicide had mental health issues, such as Autism and Aspergers. About 50% of people with Aspergers have probably contemplated their own suicide as well. Now that you know this, can you comprehend why it is so important that we understand people affected by Aspergers Syndrome? If people took the time to try and listen to the language and meanings that people with Aspergers speak with, then they can think more insightfully about why they do

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certain things. They can also help save those who are depressed, or alone that might even eventually think about suicide. Aspergers is a serious issue that is growing rapidly now in the world, individuals dont make the attempt to try and figure out the reasons behind their actions. If we try to understand the way they communicate with us, and how theyre speaking then maybe we can be able to live together happily and not create a stereotype for these people to label them with. Suicide is another issue we are dealing with here, but some of the ways we can fix that is by starting with the individuals who have mental health issues, such as Aspergers, and helping them feel comfortable around others as we do. Some people might say that it isnt such a big issue or that its their fault for acting that way. With the proper education and investment of time into understanding them, they can see that it isnt their fault, but the fault of those who influence them to act a certain way or do something that isn't right. Next time you see someone you know-in class or in the halls--with Aspergers, ask how they are doing and see how they reply, maybe you might even find that you have a lot in common. The little things a community can do could really help others with Aspergers.

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Works Cited Bogdashina, Olga. Communication issues in autism and Asperger syndrome: Do we speak the same language? London: Jessica Kingsley, 2004. 211. Edmonds, Genevieve, and Luke Beardon. Asperger syndrome and social relationships: Adults speak out about Asperger syndrome. London: Jessica Kingsley, 2008. 45. Harpur, John, Maria Lawlor, and Michael Fitzgerald. Succeeding with interventions for Asperger syndrome adolescents: A guide to communication and socialisation in interaction therapy. London: Jessica Kingsley, 2006. 82. Jacobsen, Paula. Asperger syndrome and psychotherapy: Understanding Asperger perspectives. London: Jessica Kingsley, 2003. 13. Miller, Alec L., Jill H. Rathus, and Marsha Linehan. Dialectical behavior therapy with suicidal adolescents. New York: Guilford P, 2007. 7.