Zombie-Free Research and Education Zone

Zombie -- (Zom-bee):
The animated but severely brain-damaged human corpse that lacks autonomy, choice, and soul; cultural icon of the biological, moral, spiritual and intellectual precept of greed, consumption, selfishness; a narrative trope that exposes the social reality with which we are complicit: that all of our vaunted technological progress, democracy, personal liberties, and economic freedoms are inseparable from the interpersonal distrust, disregard for the past, moral confusion and cultural destruction around us; but also a trope that protects us from personal responsibility, by hiding the truth in plain sight a public lie that both fascinates and horrifies. The zombie symbolizes (our own) power without consciousness, action without awareness, confidence without morality. Unlike vampires, zombies cannot hear very well, do not understand much human language, if any, and do not think critically or accept simple scientific laws or evaluate consequences. Zombies are compelled to infect the living, thus forcing them to become zombies like themselves. When faced with shortages of living humans, zombies frequently revert to cannibalism by eating one another to survive . By their actions, they act in accord with the belief in infinite growth, that more is always better than enough; the belief in ego ethics, that there can be nothing more important than ones own compulsions and desires, and the belief in nihilism or cynicism, that there is no meaning, no redemption, no social reality other than the principle of survival of the fittest that might makes right. Some speculate that zombies can be cured, or that they can revert to some semblance of humanity but whether it takes the threat of immanent destruction, some special medical treatment, the unremitting love (and caution and patience) of caring hopeful humans, or some combination remains unknown. And yet, it is our mandate in higher education and research to protect and contribute to human flourishing; therefore, we prepare for the worst as we hope for the best: a cure for zombies, treatment strategies to assist those zombies in recovery, assistance and support for their human caregivers, investigation of the cause and sources of zombie behaviors and beliefs,and the development of better means of defense, weaponry, containment strategies, and potentially in a worst-case scenario a means of eradication. Are you ready for higher education?