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Issue 83.18/09/2013
SURGO
Contents
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James Tadjkarimi Assistant Editor
Editors note Medical news Glasgow effect New South Glasgow Hospital NHS after Yes An FY1 in London Surgo Research: Results Ig Nobel Prize FAQ awards Medical News Quiz A Scots English dictionary
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Josh Nielsen Production Editor
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Editorial
So here we are again at the beginning of another glossy Surgo edition, brimming with hope and promise; the sun is almost shining, taps aff is becoming ever more appropriate, and the world and his wife are stuck indoors taking no make-up selfies before accidentally donating to Unicef. This issue endeavours to conquer the somewhat ambitious task of trying to make Glasgows public health issues interesting. For those of you who have yet to encounter the med schools very own God of public health, Phil Hanlon, youll know that this is no mean feat. The reasons behind Glaswegian supremacy when it comes to low life expectancy, poor mental health and premature aging is something that Profs everywhere have long been trying to explain. How Glasgow, unlike any other European city, manages to turn even its wealthiest citizens into patients unlikely to live past 40 remains a mystery. Finance editor Tom Baddeley attempts to get to the bottom of this and asks Dr David Morrison whether hosting the Commonwealth Games will have any impact at all. Contributing writer Jamie Henderson then pays a visit to the mammoth New South General Hospital to play a game of should the fourth years stay in Glasgow, or should they escape while they still can. To make this decision even more difficult, Dan Taylor-Sweet has a look at how independence will affect the NHS: for better or for worse. If the idea of working in the new super hospital, treating UBIs (see medical news) in an independent Scotland leaves you feeling a little anxious, send prof. an FAQ or alternatively, read former Glasgow student Sheelagh Harwells account of her experiences as an FY1 in London. Once youve got through all of this it gets a little more trivial Cast your minds back to the distant memory of Surgos November edition and our first foray into the world of clinical research. Assistant editor James Tajkarimi brings you the results of this much acclaimed trial, proving once and for all which hangover cures work and which most certainly do not. To continue this disconcertingly positive trend, arts editor David Boyle gives you a snapshot into the fantastic world of the Ig Nobel prize, somehow managing to shoehorn both fly fishing and shrews into one article. This brings us nicely on to some humour from within Wolfsons own walls, with of a compilation of the years best FAQs and a few words from Prof. Walters himself. Last but not least, Jane Hamilton explores the world outside of facebook with an impossibly difficult quiz and Josh Hughes gives us a way into the world of Glaswegian slang.
And with that all thats left to say is, Let Surgo Flourish. Ella Bennett Editor in Chief.
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News News
Medical News
A collection of the latest medical news ranging from the semi-relevant to entirely ridiculous (credit goes to the Daily Mails health pages for the latter)
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and trade. People flocked from the highlands and Ireland looking for jobs. This triggered the birth of one of Glasgows most distinctive features; the sandstone tenements. Majestic as they are now, these were overcrowded, poorly maintained with dubious sanitation which unsurprisingly resulted in a surge in health problems to the extent that life expectancy became as low as 27 in some areas. This situation was not unique to Glasgow however, cities such as London, Manchester and Liverpool were experiencing similar problems. It was not until the deindustrialisation period during the 1950s-1980s that the gap began to appear. Something happened during this period which changed the very constitution of the city, something that affected not only Glasgows physical health but also the Glaswegian psyche.
just doesnt make sense; yes, there are too many heart attacks and cancer cases but these figures are not sufficient to account for Glasgows supremacy in achieving early death. Weve established that poverty cant really be the answer, with Liverpool and Manchester managing to cling on for substantially more years than Glaswegian despite achieving similar levels of depravation. Glasgow beats these cities in a few other places too; we have far greater deaths from suicide, violence, drug and alcohol abuse and traffic accidents and have far poorer mental health. Glaswegians seem to be, for whatever reason, more prone to despair and hopelessness than others.
Glaswegians seem to be more prone to hopelessness and despair than people from other cities.
source of this discrepancy, you have to look into the past. In its hay day, Glasgow was known as the second city of the British Empire, a hub of industry
It isnt just Glasgows poorest that are affected by this; even the most affluent weegies die much younger than their English counterparts. Its a wonder really why Salmond hasnt used this in his Glaswegian life expectancy was, and still independence campaign, someone should is, the lowest in Western Europe. Whats really give #bettertogether a ring. odd is that when you look at health Over the years the health and crime rates statistics, the perception this is down to Glaswegians love of deep fried mars bar in Glasgow have improved, but still at a slower rate than the rest of the country. washed down with 18 cans of tenants
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Something provokes these selfdestructive behaviours. Theories such as vitamin D deficiency, the hedonistic culture of getting mad wi it or even the bad weather and prolonged, cold winters have all been considered, but no general conclusion reached. The reason seems to go deeper than that. Epigenetics is the heritable changes in gene activity which are not caused by changes in the DNA sequence. Essentially certain genes are expressed inappropriately, and this alters the DNA methylation status. This enables the effects of parents experiences to be passed down to subsequent generations. A study undertaken here at the At best, according to the epidemiologists' calculations, deprivation accounts for less University of Glasgow found that than half (around 40%) of Glasgow's insufficient maternal care or poor diet, or mortality gap"compared with the rest of the " even low maternal mood during UK. The other causes are still unknown. pregnancy can all lead to an inherited sensitivity to stress in the child, global epigenetic changes (due to smokpredisposing them to development of ing, diet, deprivation etc) and increased obesity, diabetes and atherosclerosis. biomarkers for inflammation such as Additionally, a link was found between IL-6 and fibrinogen resulting in a general
inflammatory state in the individual for the rest of their life. While these results are not the be all and end all, they are a step into understanding why this situation exists, and hopefully what can be done to fix it. (Glasgow is still an amazing city despite these problems, and it is a privilege for us to study and hopefully practise medicine here in the future. The current health problems here are like a glimpse into the past, with exposure to extremely sick patients, and diseases that are not present in many other parts of the UK. We should therefore use this opportunity to better our knowledge of these and become hopefully become better doctors in the process.) We asked David Morrison, a reader in Cancer Epidemiology based at the West of Scotland Cancer Surveillance Unit for his opinion on what effect if any the commonwealth games would have of the health of Glasgows denizens. Over to you David.
Dr David Morrison on the potential impact of Glasgow hosting the Commonwealth games
We carried out a systematic review to look for evidence about the health effects of major sporting events, such as the Commonwealth Games. While there are short-term economic benefits, there is little evidence to suggest that there are long-term economic or health benefits. While absence of evidence is not evidence of absence of an effect, do I think that the Commonwealth Village is likely to lead to measurable improvements in health? It may do, but if it does, it may be more to do with the fact that people who move into new housing are likely to be healthier (and wealthier) than the rest of the population rather than because chronic health problems can be quickly ameliorated by housing improvements alone . None of which is to say that the redevelopment of the east end with sustainable, energy efficient housing is not a good thing. Similarly, building modern new sports facilities providing they are affordable and accessible to everyone is a good thing, but is it the most effective way of improving health? Well, the single biggest thing that would improve health would be to stop people smoking. The effects of that would be greater than any amount of additional exercise. More broadly, finding ways of getting the majority of the population gainfully employed would have far-reaching and long-lasting benefits on their health. But improvements in public health are achieved through a range of activities and they are all important. Some problems are more difficult to fix than others. So while were working on ways of further reducing the prevalence of smoking, obesity, alcohol abuse and other health problems, provision of better sports facilities is a welcome contribution to improving public health.
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Just a small change from making the depressing pilgrimage from a rammed WILT to an even more soul-destroying Boyd Orr then
The new hospital is equivalent to 3 Western Infirmarys with Yorkhill stuck on the side.
infamous portacabin; it will be replaced by an atrium that would not look out of place in a Merchant City office block. A central hub of the shiny new Hospital filling the alcohol-gel laden air with the much loved aroma of hospital cuisine. Hopefully there'll be windows.
Yorkhill to go
The new hospital, which has already begun to tower over Glasgow, will be completed during the first quarter of 2015. Many of the services currently provided by the Victoria and Western Infirmaries will move at this time and it is hoped that the hospital will be fully operational by the summer of 2015. Thats just in time for our current fourth years to start their FY1 jobs. This is also exciting for those of us in the pre-clinical These new style wards will surround a years as our initial clinical experience, central space housing shops, a caf and and much of our teaching, will be in a the hospital canteen. Gone is the brand new, state of the art hospital.
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Glasgow Hospital
The Royal Hospital for Sick Children at Yorkhill will provide specialist services only available in Glasgow to the rest of the West of Scotland. The linking of this with the existing specialist maternity unit will mean that all specialties are completely centralised. Whilst the childrens hospital will be attached to the adult hospital it will have its own identity, much like Yorkhill has today. Unlike in the adult hospital, wards will be a mixture of four bedded bays and single rooms as it was evidence suggests that many children have better outcomes when surrounded by others. hospital. As the facility is shared with the NHS the medical school will only have official use of 50% of its capacity, though this will apparently remain flexible. Within the building itself there will be a 500-seat lecture theatre, a caf with good coffee Im assured, clinical training facilities Architects drawing of the multi-story car park and a library space. It is envisaged that the facility will be staffed Clinical Skills from 8am to 8pm allowing NHS staff to Alna Robbs dream home has finally use the facilities outwith their normal been built. With a new clinical skills working hours. It also aims to take some New Learning and suite, mirroring the layout of patient of the burden off the SL, during times of bedrooms within the new hospital, there Teaching Building great need such as when four of the hunwill be more scope within Glasgow for dred light bulbs spontaneously combust. Along with these new hospitals the mediclinical training. It will consist of a 12 cal school and NHS Greater Glasgow Somewhat conspicuously, I couldnt find bedded area, 8 of which will have live and Clyde are making a any pictures of this snazzy new medical oxygen and suction, and a prep area. All significant investment in medical school offshoot so I thought Id stick in areas of which will be covered by education. Construction has already an equally snazzy, not at all CGI-ed cameras with the ability to pan, tilt and begun on a Learning and Teaching picture of New Souths multi-story zoom, allowing Alna to monitor your Facility that will be shared with car-park. Further proof that a world every move from the comfort of her inNHSGGC, and will be linked to the new where car headlights are red and the sky built throne. The cameras will also give is purple is altogether a tutors the ability to record and feedback better one. on student performance from an adjacent control room. Students will be able to The majority of pre-clinical training book time within this facility to practice will remain on campus; with older their clinical skills, just like in the students who are attending Wolfson. placements, within Glasgow using this facility for the majority of their clinical teaching. With all these facilities arriving in Glasgow over the next few years we Access to the library, something I have no excuse for poor clinical skills. think we are all dying to know Trips to Govan will become a daily about, will hopefully be 24 hours occurrence rather making that once a for students as well as staff year scrubby trip significantly less novel. although the practicalities of this You never know, perhaps some of us have yet to be worked out. will be tempted to make Brechans our local.
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NHS after
Our contributing writer; Mr Daniel Taylor-Sweet explores what may happen to our health service following the Independence vote taking place later this year
On the 18th of September this year the future of Scotland, as we know it, will be placed into your hands. Salmond and the SNP are putting the question of independence to the people of Scotland and inevitably, this will have some effect on the NHS. the lack of prescription charges, by providing free car parking at hospitals, and in having managed to avoid Andrew Lansleys controversial Health and Social Care Bill. already in place allowing UK nationals to get treatment in the EU. Its argued that the impact of this newly formed, highly complicated relationship would be seen predominantly in highly Aneurin Bevans brainchild is taking a niche areas of certain specialisms such as very different path on each side of the paediatrics, cancer care and Regardless of your political and cultural border, a gulf that is likely to continue to transplantation services. views, a vote for an independent widen in an independent Scotland. If the One of the most frequent examples of Scotland would have a drastic impact on current state of affairs were to continue, cross boarder cooperation is seen in the day to day life of everyone in this it is likely that the South will head down transplantation cases. Currently any country. A deluge of changes would be the path to greater privatisation, with the patient requiring a lung or heart-lung implicated across the public and private North likely to become even more transplant in Scotland has to be sent to sectors and these changes will not go dependant on public funding. the transplant unit in the Freeman unnoticed. An NHS in an independent Scotland Hospital, Newcastle upon Tyne. Better The NHS in Scotland has been devolved would face less drastic changes than Together argue that this special since 1999 giving Holyrood a large other sectors such as the military and relationship with the Freeman and other amount of control over the spending of intelligence agencies, but changes would specialist units could be affected by its health care budget. Since this time, be seen in several other areas that may independence. This would directly several major differences have developed affect patient care. impact on the healthcare of Scottish in the NHS above and below the border. people, leading them to receive a lower Currently any patient in Scotland NHS Scotland currently differs from its standard of care than their Southern requiring treatment in England (or vice Southern brother in three principle areas; neighbours. Margaret Watt, chairwoman versa) is able to do so as part of a longof the Scotland Patients Association, standing agreement with NHS England. said: Whatever the outcome of the This creates an interdependent relationreferendum, there is already pressure on ship between the NHS in Scotland and patients when it comes to travelling for the NHS south of the border. medical treatment and the system for The No campaign reminds us that the treatment south of the Border is relationship between NHS Scotland and complicated enough. We wouldnt want NHS England following a Yes vote to see patients placed with any additional would be a very different one. Better burdens. Together claim that the simple internal Several high profile health charities have relationship between what are effectively also spoken out on the issue of two governmental organisations will be international cross border care, with replaced with a complex international Macmillan Cancer Support even going relationship with all the associated as far as recommending that patients do bureaucracy. not seek treatment abroad as they say They also claim that any patient treatment in other EU countries (as Aneurin Bevan was the MP who drafted the requiring treatment across the newly England would be) can take a number bill that lead to the implementation of the NHS formed international border would need of weeks, possibly months, which is in England, Scotland, Wales and Northern Island in 1948. to follow a similar process to the one likely to be detrimental to patient care.
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people of Scotland and will prove that free healthcare is critical, and it is here to stay, leaving the fine details that outline specialist treatment to be confirmed and finalised after a Yes vote. Therefore the situation of the NHS is left to the voters, with the understanding that there will be some changes that are detrimental, and also some changes that are beneficial for the Scottish people.
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Surgo Review
An FY1 in London
I moved down to London in the wake of my accountant boyfriend who was attracted to the big smoke like a moth to the flame. I am now in month two of FY1. This article lays out some of my experiences so far, with the view to help any other Glasgow medical students interested in FY1 in London.
Planning
Firstly, I did not make the decision rashly; I chose to do my second elective in London, an academic psychiatry placement at the Maudsley hospital, to test the water. I thoroughly enjoyed my 4 weeks there and would recommend a placement before applying as its a different beast altogether from other cities in the UK.
door of the hospital in 25 minutes. Friends say this is an amazing commute, so be prepared for worse. Surgery is the toughest as shifts can start as early as 6am.
Money
London is expensive. My rent and travel are half my monthly salary. To get a nice flat in a very nice area, we had to put an offer in that day and the estate agents fees were 380 to get us both references and hand us a set of keys. The London weighting is roughly 1000 a year, but seeing as the tube is 200 a month, this doesnt really cut it. My rent is over double my Glasgow rent.
The hospital
For FY1 I am placed in Kingston hospital, a small district general 20 minutes south of the Thames. Its a very affluent area near Richmond Park (where the famous Fenton the dog is walked) with yummy mummy Wimbledon next door. The hospital itself employs 38 FY1s, and there is a doctors mess with free toast and coffee (essential for on calls). The hospital just became its own trust, which apparently means its reaching the targets that are so important to the management team but all I know is that its a really friendly, clean and modern hospital. All the FY1s are good. And I mean lumbar puncturing-in-their-first-week good.
Opportunities
Having said goodbye to your social life and most of your wages you will, hopefully, look around and realise that London is brimming with opportunity. I once presented a patient at a neuro-oncology MDT and afterwards someone said Ill do her pituitary if her notes are on my desk on Monday. I was so scared I scuttled off without asking his name (turned out it was Mr Henry Marsh Wikipedia him). Im currently being forced to do 4 audits. Literally forced. Its like youre a freak if you say no. There are lots of academic meetings and grand rounds to present interesting patients at. We also have compulsory prescribing exams and ABG training, not to mention 2 hours bleep-free teaching a week. Having said that, I wouldnt say its particularly different to Glasgow; those that seek these extra opportunities anywhere will get the same exposure.
The job
I am currently on Neurology, which involves me working across 3 hospitals, one of which is a specialist neuro-rehab centre. This has meant that Ive experienced 3 different systems but has made has made it more difficult to meet other FY1s as they lunch together and I can only join twice a week. My neurology exam has become my main competency as I do it at least 10 times a day. Even fundoscopy is now my friend.
FY2
For all FY1s in London, it is important to realise you will do one year centrally and one year peripherally. And that can be We do one long on-call day a week until 10pm and one week- very peripherally. Like further away than Edinburgh. I decided end in eight. This is when you roam 8 wards alone, prescribing to do my central year first as there is a very active FY2 Swap warfarin and gentamicin, running away from nurses and Shop run by South Thames Foundation School, so I thought praying no one gets ill. It is on-call that Ive cannulated a foot, Id at least have a little more autonomy over my placements. catheterised, sedated, started the sepsis 6, spoken to relatives, Its worked out, so far. You dont find out what youre doing interpreted x-rays, pronounced death, pulled out drains, called in FY2 (not in South Thames anyway), but almost everyone the crash team and generally sweated all over. If in doubt, page does A&E. the FY2.
On-call
The commute
Something that all Londoners endure; even at the weekend, trying to traverse through the population of 12 million can reduce you to tears. I live in Pimlico and can get to the front
Hopefully this brief account of my experiences will help some poor souls going through the FPAS process next year. If you would like any advice, please email me on Sheelagh.Harwell@kingstonhospital.nhs.uk
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Surgo Research
Results
To recap: participants were randomly allocated to one of seven treatment groups and instructed to consume an average Saturday nights worth of alcohol. The seven treatment groups were: 1. Paracetamol/ibruprofen with Irn Bru 2. 5k run to Maryhill Tesco's and back 3. Full Scottish breakfast 4. Hair of the dog (drink of choice) 5. Milk Thistle tablets 6. 0.9% saline 7. Wallowing in self pity (control group).
Participants were asked to rate on a scale of one to ten, how they felt when they woke up in the morning, and 2 hours after their allocated hangover cure. On waking, far too early thanks in part to haphazard sleeping arrangements and also to a certain ex editor insisting on opening the curtains, our guinea pig subjects certainly felt a little worse for wear. A large proportion experienced fatigue or general tiredness, with only 2 saying that this feeling was minimal. Many also scored 10 out of 10 for apathy or a lack of concern. However as this remained largely unchanged following treatment, this may have been skewed by the cynical nature of most Surgo contributors. Concentration problems had a relatively normal distribution throughout the population, with clumsiness and confusion scoring quite low. It was proposed that in future studies, a rubix cube could be introduced to further asses these parameters but due to financial constraints, this did not materialise. Thirst scored extremely highly as most people couldnt quite make it to the kitchen for a glass of water for fear of triggering another pounding headache, or worse, a not -so-tactical chunder. People experienced little to no shivering or shakes, stomach pain or palpations. There were however, scatterings of dizziness and nausea seen in isolated pockets of the population. Following ingestion of the allocated cure, and once the two poor souls who had to run to Maryhill Tesco in order to procure readily fry-able foods had returned, subjects lounged around for a number of hours before they could summon the will to return to their respective homes. They once again took the questionnaire posed to them earlier, at which point I was left to discern what effect, if any, these therapies had had on their hangover status. Results were largely inconclusive though there was a slight global shift to a drop in severity of symptoms for all areas tested; except that of apathy. Thanks guys.
Discussion
From our results, it appears very difficult to discern which remedy had the most effect in eliminating the toxic effects of alcohol. Clearly, the strictness of scientific protocol wasnt upheld as we all got food envy and ended up joining in on the fry up. In addition to this, a handful of subjects forgot to fill in the questionnaire so had to do so retroactively. Despite these minor short-falls, for our first foray into research it was a fine attempt and although weve learnt pretty much nothing about what works, weve gained extensive experience of what doesnt. Like most of the population when asked, subjects swore their method of getting rid of a hangover was the only effective way of doing so, and, as expected, its probably based on a foggy notion that on that one morning after the night before they felt right as rain. This author swears by two paracetamol and a pint of water before bed (if you can remember to do so, which is hardly ever) but again, cant really back that up with anything more than anecdotal evidence. Our current editor on the other hand, has become recreationally addicted to Milk Thistle. I think its also true to say that in all the years that ethanol has existed, if a magic bullet for treating hangover symptoms existing we would surely have discovered it by now. Before starting this trial, we did find a number of papers out there examining many weird and wonderful treatments, with no clear consensus. The conclusion they reached was much the same as ours; if a 100% certified hangover cure sounds too good to be true, it probably is. Drink in moderation, or otherwise, try curling.
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The day you find yourself swallowing an entire shrew is the day you know you really are making a difference to the world and shaping the future of generations to come. Id like to think you are now looking at your surroundings, questioning them and will strive to change them. What are the effects of Calvin Klein boxers on Sloths with inguinal hernias?! Stay tuned to Surgo and youll be the first to know. Until next time scholars. Science.
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Fun stuff
Prof on the future of medical education Medical educationalists have tried a huge range of initiatives (PBL, CBL, etc) but the potential benefit of a full -on staff/ student fist fight in the car park at the end of a tough five years has been sorely overlooked. In a few years the OSCE will be one 5 minute station consisting of a basket of puppies and a big hug.
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Fun stuff
On Pulmonary Embolisms: This young seal presented with pleuritic chest pain and shortness of breath on diving. He had noted a swollen flipper a few days earlier but had not sought medical attention. The CT scan he was undergoing when this picture was taken showed a filling defect in the pulmonary artery. In the absence of obvious risk factors they did a thrombophilia screen which showed he had "protein sea" deficiency. He was treated with "wharf-arin" and you'll be pleased to hear he made a full recovery. The Tale of the 5th Floor Terror For a time in January the SL was plunged into darkness and reports began to filter in that strange happenings were to be seen on the 5th floor. Bloodcurdling screams, flickering lights and even a balding man pacing the shelves and muttering about traction alopecia. It started quietly with an innocuous FAQ about hair loss: Dear Prof, A wee festive EMQ for you that has left us close to tears. 2010 paper 1 EMQ 1.2 Theme: Hair loss. Can you shed some light? (The urgent answer) LISTEN CLOSELY. DO EXACTLY AS I SAY AND EVERYTHING WILL BE FINE! SLOWLY PUT THE QUESTION DOWN. BACK AWAY TOWARDS THE DOOR. KEEP YOUR EYES ON THE QUESTION. NO SUDDEN MOVEMENTS. ONCE OUT OF THE ROOM GENTLY CLOSE THE DOOR. BRICK UP THE DOOR AND NEVER SPEAK OF THIS QUESTION TO ANYONE ELSE. EVER. This is the worst question in the history of finals. We have taken it out of the question bank and had it shot. Later that week, Hi Prof, I did as you asked and walled up a project room) with that alopecia question inside. Unfortunately I can now hear scratching and weeping noises from within. Either the question has grown sentient heralding the start of a follicly challenged apocalypse, or I accidentally sealed a first year in there too. Dear Prof, I unwalled the 5th floor project room as some nutters needed for "OSCE practice". Much to my surprise inside I found the carcass of a now bald 1st year, but the alopecia question was nowhere to be seen. Ive stared patrolling the SL with a shotgun and a can of rogaine Dear Student, Stay vigilant! I fear that rogue alopecia question may have targeted Jesse Dawson, he's in the office next to me writing an IPL scenario about Minoxidil while wearing a baseball hat. Musings on life as a medical student... I suffered a similar fate in 5th year during a block at Inverclyde. Imagine a wet Guantanamo Bay with a chip shop. One of my ultra-keen student colleagues insisted on being given a page so he could be beeped for interesting events out of hours, and to alleviate the terrible boredom we took it in turns to get up overnight and page him from the only phone in the residences, getting him to call the number of that same phone. He never worked out why it was constantly engaged, despite being three o'clock in the morning. Progressively the relentless sleep deprivation took a terrible toll on him. The UN insisted on the closure of those residencies not long after. Q. Hey Prof, thought you might be interested to know you share the same birthday as Elijah Wood. I can certainly see a lot in common, both saviours of the free world and vanquishers of evil dark overlords (a certain he who shall not be named year head) A. Your Lord of the Rings reference is pretty apt: I frequently see the frail, emaciated figure on the left while I'm at work and wonder if he's following me: Do you think they're related?
There have been more than 5 FAQs a day submitted since Christmas, some at 3 in the morning, some in barely intelligible English and most clearly on the edge of despair. But all have been answered with compassion, wit and genuine insight. A big thanks, and SRC teaching award goes to Prof. for undertaking such a mammoth task. In his own words: I do this not for money but because I care. That and the sad fact that my bins get out more often than I do.
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Fun Stuff
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Fun stuff
Scottish-English Dictionary
All of us non-Glaswegians will remember a time, probably from somewhere towards the beginning of first year, when someone came up to you shouting geiswanoyerfagsahvranoot. Your response to this could mean the difference between hearing Nae bother pal, cheers and am gaunae chib ye (I am going to stab you). So here are a few words and phrases to help decipher this strange, strange language.. English to Scottish Child Wean, bairn, chile, littlin Disgusting/dirty Boggin, clairtie, manky, mingin, houghin Drunk Steamin, mingin, pished, hammered, guttered, blutered, fou, smeekit, roarie, the worse odrink, bleezin fou, pie eyed, mortal, stottin, soople. Excellent/good Guid, braw, grand, rare, barrie Idiot Eejit, galoot, numpty, daftie, bawheid, muppet, neep heid, bampot Shut up/stop talking nonsense Haud yer wheesht, dinnae haver, git awa an bile yer heid, yer aff yer heid! Sick Nae weel, peelie-wallie, seek Scottish to English Words and Phrases Blether Chat, gossip Bonnie Pretty, nice Dour (pronounced door) Glum or miserable Foosty - Mouldy Geesa or geis (pronounced Geez) Give me. E.g. geesa light. Haver To lie or speak nonsense (pronounced Hayvurr) Jag - Injection Jake/jakey Term used in Scotland for those you might regularly see seeking advice from Jeremy Kyle. Also known as a Ned. Jis a few bevvies Just a few drinks. Can mean anything between a thimble of sherry a month, and two bottles of whisky a day. Och! Oh! E.g. Och aye the noo means Oh yes, just now, although no Scottish person has ever said this. Pal A word used to refer to just about anybody in any situation. Common uses (e.g. Yalright pal?) can be friendly, aggressive or anywhere in between, depending on the context. Polis The police. Sair - Sore Taps aff! Tops off! Expect to hear this everywhere on the first sunny day in May. Wee - Small Wheesht! Be quiet!
Do you have an interest in journalism or writing in general? Are you curious about the influence of the wider world on medicine, and vice versa? Do you have an opinion or perspective you think should be heard?
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