Albert Mehrabian, Ph.D., is known for his studies on the relative importance of verbal and nonverbal communication.

He formulated the 7%-38%-55% rule: 7% of the total meaning of our communication is from spoken words, 38% is from vocal variables (such as voice tone) and 55% is visual (such as facial expressions). According to Mehrabian, wordless messages impact 93% of our communication effectiveness. Please note that some studies refute this formula, however, it is clear that you should be very conscious of nonverbal communications. Your actions, attitude and intentions are often more important than what you say. Naturally, this applies to both your personal and professional relationships. Communication= Verbal + Vocal (how you say it, the tone implied if the delivery of words) + Visual (body language, facial expressions) Types of Nonverbal Communication Touch (a pat on the back, holding hands) Gestures (a nod, a wink) Facial expressions (a smile, a frown) Eye contact (direct versus indirect- up/down/sideways, blink rate) Body movements (smooth, erratic) Body language/posture (crossed arms, leaning forward, hands tightly clasped) Personal effect (clothing, hairstyle) Voice quality, tone, pace and noises (grunts, sighs)

Cultural and environmental factors (lighting, room temperature) also influence communication results. Nonverbal Communication- Observe yourself, Observe others, Take action Take an objective and honest look at yourself and others. Are you fully present with yourself and the person you are with? Are you sending, or receiving, conflicting messages? If you observe yourself in a closed body position, such as having your arms crossed, are you willing to uncross your arms and see what happens? If you notice that someones body posture is closed, are you willing to open up a dialogue? For example, I sense that you might be uncomfortable, is that accurate? You may want to change a verbal or nonverbal communication habit by using a 33 day process. Please refer to 2 Essential Guidelines to Create a New Habit and When your Relationships are Good, your Life is Good. Remember, words are important too. Words have energy, and listening skills are critical for effective communication. Very Smart Girls use verbal and nonverbal communication skills wisely.

Effectively reading non-verbal messages can dramatically improve your sales relationships, as well as your sales results.

Everyone communicates on two levels. Verbally and non-verbally. Verbal communication, or the spoken words we use, represent a very small portion (less than 10%) of our overall message. People can lie, misrepresent or mislead you with their words. Non-verbal language represents over 50% of our total message. If there is an inconsistency between the verbal message and the non-verbal message you are getting from a prospect, I would advise paying more attention to the non-verbal. The non-verbal message will always be more a more accurate representation of the person's feelings, attitudes or beliefs. There are a number of ways we communicate non-verbally. There are: gestures, facial expressions, eye movements and eye contact, posture and body position, verbal tone, inflection, pauses, pace and volume. The way people dress also sends a non-verbal signal. An easy way to determine what someone is thinking or feeling is to observe whether their signals are open or closed. Open signals represent openness, acceptance, willingness, enthusiasm, and approval. Closed signals represent the opposite of all of these. Closed signals are crossed legs, arms, hands. A lack of eye contact, rigid posture, leaning away from you, and the hands on top of the head are also examples of closed signals. Open signals are exactly what they imply: open hands, uncrossed legs, eye contact, leaning forward, and so on. There are thousands of ways we communicate non-verbally. I suggest you spend the next few days observing and trying to interpret people's non-verbal messages.

Non-verbal communication skills for selling When selling to customers, your non-verbal communication skills - such as active listening and interpreting non-verbal cues - are just as important as what you say. Developing these skills will help you understand what your customers want, so you can offer them the most suitable products and services. Listening skills Listening to your customer to discover their needs helps you suggest appropriate products or services to meet those needs. Active listening is the process of confirming what you think your customer has said, and meant, by observing their verbal and non-verbal cues. To be a good active listener you should:

focus your full attention on your customer briefly summarise your understanding of what your customer has said

take notes if necessary use appropriate non-verbal cues such as nodding your head, inclining your body forward and maintaining eye contact note your customer's non-verbal cues - are they eager, reluctant, impatient? use appropriate, well-timed probing questions and summary confirmation questions.

Understanding non-verbal cues Interpreting your customer's non-verbal signals and behaviours allows you to read their attitude and better understand their needs. Projecting the right non-verbal cues yourself can help your customer feel at ease. Here are some positive and negative examples of non-verbal cues: Facial expressions

bad - wrinkling the nose, furrowing the brow or rolling the eyes good - smiling, raised eyebrows, relaxed mouth

Eye contact

bad - avoiding your customer or looking outside your sales space good - looking back to your customer's face and at your products

Smile

bad - closed, firm or expressionless mouth good - smiling or relaxed mouth

Hands

bad - hands folded to the chest or near the face good - hands moving freely, relaxed, touching the product

Gestures

bad - closed arms, dismissive hand gestures good - open arms, nodding the head

Posture

bad - slouching, shoulders turned away good - standing upright, inclining the body forward

Position

bad - moving too close, facing away good - observing personal space accommodating cultural differences.