Jessica Hailey

9 April 2014
Prof. Linda Hofmann
ENGL
Note to Reader
Although Ive made a lot of changes to my paper, there is still a lot more that needs to be
done. Military terminology has been replaced in order to make the paper an easier read.
Quite a bit of the content was added as well as omitted. Grammatical errors were
corrected and wording was revised for clarification.
Life Over Matter
Every morning we stood in formation and we could hear a drill sergeant in
the distance: You are nothing! You worthless trainee! Where is your baring? You
call that a proper push-up? There was one trainee who couldnt seem to get
anything right. He got yelled at every day until he gave up on life altogether. He was
the first person I met who committed suicide, but little did I know, for the next 3
years in the Active Duty suicidal behavior will become a norm.
In December 2013, I transferred from Active Duty Air Force into the Reserves. I
contacted my leadership immediately and was told I could take the first month off to get
settled at home. My leadership is Traditional Reservists, meaning they have never been
on Active Duty orders. Theyre nicknamed weekend warriors because they fulfill their
duties one weekend a month and two weeks out of a year. In other words, they only deal
with the stressors of the military far less than I did on Active Duty. What are factors that
contribute to the suicide rate in Air Force Active Duty compared to the Reserves?
In boot camp, my drill sergeant had a talk with my barrack a day after a
discouraged trainee committed suicide. The other trainees and I could tell that he was
required to ask us if we were okay. One trainee dared to ask our drill sergeant why he
thinks the trainee killed himself. He answered in so many words to say poor leadership
was to blame. This would not be the last time I would hear this.
There was a clear distinction between the behaviors of Airmen depending on their
age groups. When I was boot camp orders, I realized Airmen between the ages of 16 and
25 were often separated from Airmen who were 25 years and older. Adolescent Airmen
were typically signed into Active Duty for 6 years on Active orders. 25 and older Airmen
typically signed a 4 year commitment for the Reserves. I asked Trainee Harris why she
signed a Reserves contract. Dont you know you can make more money on Active
orders? I added. She laughed at me, Girl, I already got a job. I just need a little more
money for a pay raise. And the Reserves is gonna pay for it.
Trainee Harris was 26 years old and I was only 19. Her cool demeanor and sense
of control was very common compared to the other adolescent trainees. Like all the older
ones, Trainee Harris was quick to process her thoughts not matter how much drill
sergeants yelled at her. Older trainees were thorough and less likely to stress. Boot camp
only lasts 8 weeks of your life. Get over your funk. Harris demanded.
I was surprised at how much age played a role in military members
performances. In Active Duty, adolescent Airmen constantly struggled with acceptance
while older Airmen used their benefits to advance them for their lives in general.
Adolescent Airmen were more likely to get in trouble and make impulsive decisions. Dr.
Jeannie Stultz lectured on typical behaviors of adolescent behaviors such as these. Dr.
Stultz introduced her theory as to why adolescents make impulsive decisions to calm
their uncertainties: There is no obvious, there is no surely, there is no of
coursebecause theyre reading the emotions incorrectlytheir response is going to be
incorrect. (Stultz 2010).
The majority of adolescent Airmen signed up for 6 years for a steady paycheck
but didnt take into consideration what stressor they will encounter. An assessment was
conducted in 2011 to trace patterns amongst male Airmen who struggle with suicidal
thoughts. Metrics revealed that 4.7% of the lowest pay grades, E-1 (Airman Basic)
through E-4 (Senior Airman), contemplated suicide at some point of their careers (Snarr,
Heyman and Slep). As the ranks increase, the ideation of suicide decreases. The officer
grade O-4 (Major) through O-10 (General) levels out at 2.0% thinking of suicide.
As this pertains to me, statistics show 4.8% of Black/African-American female
Airmen thought of suicide, which was the lowest percentage compared to White, Latino
and other races. Unmarried women have a higher report at 6.1%. Classified as the
unknown in religious faith, the lowest rate of 4.6% of women attempted suicide as the
highest recorded non-Christian skyrockets at 13.9%. And finally, as a Mission Support
Airman, I fit the third highest suicide attempt category of 8.3% (Snarr, Heyman and
Slep).
Little did I know I was one of those Airmen in 2011 who filled out multiple
surveys that butchered me with the same suicide questions. I was required to fill out yet
another online survey: Question 4 would be something like Have you had any suicidal
thoughts in the last 30 days? I would bubble in No. Question 12 read, Within the last
month, have you contemplated suicide? Again, No. The Air Force puts your mind
under pressure more than any other part of you. Its almost as if they want you to bubble
in Yes eventually.
Every day was as redundant as the last. Although I worked Monday through
Friday, I felt like I was never getting anything done. Like the days of boot camp, I was
chasing the 8-ball again, trying to keep up before my leadership comes down on me.
Some days, I had headaches. Others, I was dizzy from exhaustion. But there was no time
to stop, I had to be a better Airman, or get out of Active Duty.
In the Reserves, I only have to take these assessments once a month. I pass them
with flying colors or hesitation. Reserves members only suffer the impacts of these
stressor two out of thirty days. The remainder of the month belongs to the Airman. He or
she can live their lives while arranging time for their military lives. In Active Duty the
Air Force is the Airmans life and he or she can be recalled at any time. The assessments
and statistics are much higher for a person who lives their orders 24/7 rather than
someone who only fit into the Air Force culture once a month.
When I was on active orders, I didnt realized how bad I was burning myself out.
Joie Acosta and his team categorized how the struggles of military duties effects
members. Every military member starts in code green. In code green, we are alert and
well trained. We are prepared and in the best condition for duty. Code yellow is when our
environment effects us. At this point, we will have to remember all that we were trained
to do. Code orange is when something goes wrong. At this point, military members are
still focused and alert on our mission. Code red is when we first realize that were too
damaged to continue the mission (Acosta, et al). By this time, its very difficult to
recover. Some military members dont make it back to code green and end up stuck
in code yellow at best.
When I was in Active Duty, my sister made me realize when I was in code yellow
too long. Every time she called, shed suck her teeth and let out a disappointing sigh.
What? You called me to complain about the money Im sending you? I replied. Most
times when Dana pouted on the phone I knew what she was thinking until shed finally
say it, You need to come home. You my only sister and I aint seen you in over a year.
Every time she called I couldnt say no to seeing her at least ONCE a year. Now that
Im in the Reserves, I can be around every day.
As I progressed the ranks in the United States Air Force, I got the opportunity to
work with the Army, Marines and Navy. I noticed that theyre mindsets were very
different from mine. Air Force culture is so far removed from the way the other branches
live. When I sat in airports on my way to and from Temporary Duties, I would listen to
the Seamen, Soldiers and Marines talk. There were so many more of them than us. In
fact, Airmen typically reported to the same places with 3 or 5 to their 10 to 15.
A Fox News Article put the Armed Forces to the test, pushing each branch of
military to explain what theyre response is to the rising suicide rates (Fox News). The
Armys solution was to create more opportunities for their soldiers to connect and
identify with one another. As a team, soldiers will face suicidal thoughts and the facility
for counseling treatment will be extended.
The Marines was blunt in admitting that the majority of their members deal with
substance abuse. As a solution, they feel they will attempt to minimize punishment and
maximize rehabilitation. The Navy also admitted to substance abuse as an issue in their
branch, but they also targeted the importance of family issues (Fox News).
Air Force Spokesman Lieutenant Colonel Brett Ashworth suggested the poor
leadership is one of the key issues causing the suicide rate in the Air Force. As a solution,
he proposed that Airmen use a new Air Force website that includes tips on
recognizing distressed personnel (Fox News).
The Air Force Personnel Center is accessible to anyone. It includes links to a
variety of tools for suicide prevention. One of the main tools that tasked leadership to
confront the suicide rate in the Air Force was the Air Force Pamphlet (AFPAM) 44-160
(Christianson). The Department of Defense (DoD) approved the writing that structured a
hierarchy that would combat suicide in the Air Force. In the AFPAM 44-160, Section I
explains how the senior ranking officers will ultimately be in charge of making sure
leadership is proactive with their Airmen.
The Chief of Staff of the Air Force (CSAF) will expect numbers from each Major
Command (MAJCOM). Each MAJCOM Commander will work feed metrics to the
CSAF from Wing Commanders. Wing Commanders will rely on Group Commanders to
give accurate accounts of the moral of Airmen. Each Squadron Commander will task
with officers with ways maintain good morale amongst Airmen (Christianson). In plain
terms, the AFPAM 44-160 guides Airmen to target the issue of suicide from the very top
of leadership to the bottom, rather than from the bottom up.
As the CSAF works on a global scale to maintain countless missions, Airmen
struggle with distress. Enlisted members are hands-on in mission endeavors, while most
officers make decisions based off numbers. Very few officers get up close and personal
with the troubles of the Enlisted ranks. Of those few officers, the Chaplain Corps is the
most personal career field to work with Airmen.
Chaplains are officer only. In the Air Force, there are only two ranks, officer and
enlisted. There is a fine line between the officers and the enlisted. However, the
Chaplains job is to be a comforting service to both. It is unclear how the Chaplain career
field competes (Levy et al). Each Chaplain has a divine duty, all the while maintain
combat standards in the Air Force.
The majority of career fields are geared towards one specific mission like support
to maintain a military installation or pilot for quick transportation of mission essentials.
These jobs can also be restricted to just one branch, like the Navy with ship operations.
But as for the Chaplain has a unique responsibility; he or she is required to service all
military personnel and affiliates. This probably explains why the Chaplains are more
likely to show symptoms of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) than any other career
field (Levy et al).
The job of a Chaplain requires him or her to keep many secrets. Chaplains hold a
policy of safe secret security. In other words, military members and affiliates can go to
the Chaplain for counseling for anything and the Chaplain cannot report it unless the
client is suspected to do harm to him or herself or others. I can imagine how difficult it
has to be to stay out of code red when someone is constantly going to the Chaplain for
advise, or even just to vent.
If theres anything I learned from transferring from Active Duty, its how
important it is to be where I want to be rather than where Im told to be. The freedom to
be mobile and not being tagged with statistics is always a relief. In the Reserves, I know
whats going on with my family, and where my sister is. When I leave the base in
Charleston, South Carolina, all the Commanders Calls, surveys and suicide prevention
chats are left there. As an young Airman, Im proud of the decisions Ive made to rise
above the negative statistics.



















Works Cited
Acosta, Joie, Rachel Burns, Lisa Jaycox, Christopher Pernin, and
Rajeev Ramchand. The War Within: Preventing Suicide in the U.S. Military.
Santa Monica: RAND Corporation, 2011. Print.
Christianson, Paul. Department of Defense. United States Air
Force. Air Force Suicide Prevention Program. Washington: Defense Pentagon,
2001. Web. <http://dmna.ny.gov/suicideprevention/AFPAM44-160.pdf>.
Levy, H. C., Conoscenti, L. M., Tillery, J. F., Dickstein, B. D. and Litz, B. T. (2011),
Deployment stressors and outcomes among Air Force chaplains. J. Traum.
Stress, 24: 342346. doi: 10.1002/jts.20646
Military Suicide Rate Down More Than 22 Percent Since Last
Year, Defense Officials Say. Fox News, 2013. Web. 17 Mar 2014.
<http://www.foxnews.com/us/2013/11/11/military-suicide-rate-down-
more-than-22-percent-since-last-year-defense/>.
Snarr, J. D., Heyman, R. E. and Slep, A. M. S. (2010), Recent Suicidal Ideation and
Suicide Attempts in a Large-Scale Survey of the U.S. Air Force: Prevalences
and Demographic Risk Factors. Suicide and Life-Threat Behavi, 40: 544552.
doi: 10.1521/suli.2010.40.6.544
Stultz, Jeannie, writ. "Part 1." Adolescent Brain Development. You
Tube: 22 Apr 2010. Web. 15 Mar 2014. <http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hl-
R5vtERj8 >.