Chapter 1

After Abe left the rest of the day seemed to pass by in some sort of haze.
I didn't know how long ago the hearing was, or why all of this was happening
to me.
Abe's words seemed to keep echoing off the empty cell walls, haunting me
every moment of my miserable time in here. 'hey e!ecute traitors.' I could
die" they could kill me. I had faced what I was certain would be my death
plenty of times, luckily always escaping the brink and continuing to live, but I
didn't see a way out of this. #ut of all the ways I could have died, I never
would have imagined this. o die a traitors death for something I didn't do$
It was insane.
%id I have a sign on my forehead that said 'I'm &ose 'athaway, my life will
never be my own and no matter how good my intentions may seem, someone
or something is always out to get me. (lease, take a shot yourself.'
I knew that in my eighteen years I had made a lot of enemies, and up until
recently I thought )ictor was my worst enemy, but here lately it seemed like
I was making more enemies then I was friends. he person that was setting
me up now had to be my worst enemy, and the truth was anyone could have
done it. here were plenty of people that could have wanted the *ueen dead,
and I made for an easy person to frame. he way I made a scene in public,
always standing up to her when I thought others were too afraid to, had all
been for something, but now they seemed to be coming back and biting me on
the ass.
I was so wrapped up in my thoughts that I +umped when I heard the door
leading down to the cells being slammed. I sat straight up on my bed, looking
to see who the new arrival was.
,y breath caught as I saw %imitri walking down the hall, his beautiful face
nearly enough to brighten my day, nearly. 'e was only being followed by two
guardians, who stopped a few cells down from mine. he guardians standing
guard at my cell looked surprised to see him, but they didn't *uestion it.
I was surprised to see him, so much so that I didn't speak until he was
standing in front of my cell, his eyes searching my face, drinking me in.
-'ey,- I said softly, not knowing what else to say.
-Can we have a moment$- %imitri asked the guardians outside my cells, they
e!changed looks and finally nodded. I recognized the look they e!changed,
the look on their faces as the moved down the hall, +ust out of earshot but
close enough to monitor my actions, pity. hey pitied me, because they knew
I was innocent or because they saw me pleading with %imitri earlier, our
situations reversed, I didn't know, but either way I was grateful for the
privacy.
-&oza.- 'is brown eyes softened as he spoke my nickname aloud, and I
allowed myself to feel a sudden burst of warmth at his words.
-'ow did you get in here$-
-I had a friend or two working that was willing to help me out.- .ust like
,ikhail he had friends among the guardians. /o matter past actions, our kind
helped each other, we had to in a world like this.
-0hy$-
-I needed to see you.- 'im being here, down in the cells visiting me after
taking out so many guardians +ust so they couldn't get to me, spoke volumes
of his love for me.
-I didn't do it.-
-I know,- he said softly, his accent a lovely one that I had missed so, so
much. 'e had said it before, he knew my character. 'e knew what, and who,
I was capable of killing1 the undead. I would never kill another ,orio or
%hampir, their lives were too precious. 'e knew me. 'e didn't offer any
blank words to make me feel better or comfort me, and I almost wished he
did, but him being here was enough.
he note in my pocket seemed burn, reminding me of it's presence. I needed
to help 2issa, but could it wait until after the trial, which could take weeks,
or even months$ I knew the answer immediately. hey come first. It was our
mantra, and 2issa had always, and would always, be the first priority in my
life. his cell was +ust an obstacle, one that would be difficult to overcome,
but not impossible. atiana herself had told me not to waste any time
fulfilling this, I had to get out of here.
I looked at %imitri, the person I used to trust with everything. Could I trust
him again$ hat answer came immediately too, of course I could, but would I
be selfish enough to involve him and damage everything he was trying to
work for again$
#f course I would.
-%imitri$- I asked warily, -do you still love me$-
'e was silent for several moments, his eyes burning into mine. -I would do
anything to protect you,- he said, avoiding my *uestion.
hat was all I needed, I reached into my pocket and pulled out the note. I
looked down the hall, making sure the guardians weren't watching us, luckily
they were respecting my privacy still, so I handed the note to %imitri.
It is a secret you must share with as few as possible. I idly wondered if
atiana would respect the person I was deciding to share this secret with,
and suddenly wished that she had told me specifically what to do. #r at least
wrote down who killed her so it would make my +ob easier.
%imitri silently read the note, his grim e!pression changing to one of wonder.
-3he is helping you from her grave,- he breathed, in total awe of the dead
*ueen.
-I need you to help me,- I hissed as %imitri handed me my note back.
-I will.- 'e didn't hesitate.
-/o matter how stupid and reckless it may seem$-
his time he did hesitate and I spoke again before he had the chance to
answer. -4ou owe me this.-
I hated using that card. his %imitri didn't owe me anything, e!cept maybe
an apology for the horrible words that day in the church, but the 3trigoi
%imitri owed me a lot. 5verything. 3till this %imitri couldn't forgive himself,
so he would pay the debt for the 3trigoi %imitri. I knew it.
-/o matter how stupid and reckless,- he agreed, but his eyes looked weary.
I looked around, before I leaned into the bars. %imitri leaned in closer too
and I placed my lips +ust above his ear. -6et me the fuck out of here.-
Chapter 7
I e!pected %imitri to say something, anything to let me know that he
understood what needed to be done. 0hen I pulled back from the bars to
look at his face, only to see that perfect face blank of any emotion, I felt
my mood plummeting. I needed %imitri to do this for me.
'e was giving me one of those long measured looks that were so common
from him, and again I wondered what he saw when he looked at me. A
pathetic guardian locked behind bars for a murder she didn't commit or the
fiery, se!y &ose that he used to know, the &ose he used to love.
I was waiting for him to answer me, and after every moment that passed I
realized he wasn't going to give me an answer.
I opened my mouth to speak, but the look he gave me cut me off. A strand of
hair fell into his face and he absently tucked it back behind his ear, only to
have it fall in his face again. I felt a smile turning up the corners of my lips,
and %imitri's eyes grew soft.
'e turned around and walked down the halls, his guardians falling into step
behind him, and my guards came back to my cell.
-0hat was that about$- #ne of them asked, arching one eyebrow.
-/othing,- I muttered, my mood dark once again. I was sulking.
'e shrugged and went back to looking at the wall in front of him, his face as
blank and emotionless as %imitri's.
0hen %imitri reached the end of the hall, he turned around and looked back
at me. here was something in his eyes that gave me hope, but it also gave
me doubt. I wanted to scream after him to tell me what he was going to do.
If he was going to do anything. 'e promised me, and %imitri had always been
a man of his word, but I knew how he felt about duty. About doing the right
thing at all times, and feeling the guilt of all the wrong that he has caused.
8reaking me out of +ail might be too much bad for him, especially after all
the hurt and pain he had been causing innocent people.
I threw myself on the cot, taking some comfort in the fact that %imitri had
laid on this cot not too long ago, and easily slipped into 2issa's head. 9or +ust
a second I felt guilty about using 2issa as my way to escape this cell, as a
way to keep in touch with reality, but it passed +ust as *uickly as it came on.
3he was with Christian, thankfully fully dressed, but what they were doing
made my already bad mood even worse.
'e was still teaching her how to fight.
hey were practicing in 2issa's suite, the furniture pushed to the sides of
the room. &eminding me of their 2ehigh trip, when they were learning how to
'stake' pillows. I would much rather 2issa be learning to punch than stake
though, so I wasn't too mad.
5specially if I was going to die, then she needed to know how to protect
herself.
-2issa,- Christian sighed, his voice e!asperated, -don't hold back on me.-
-I'm not:- hrough the bond I could tell that she was holding back,because
she didn't want to hurt him, it +ust wasn't in her nature.
-4es, you are.- .ust like always Christian knew when 2issa was lying, he knew
her so well.
3he balled her fist up again, +ust like I showed her that day when trying to
save her life, and took a swing at his face. I could tell that she was still
holding back, but she put a little more force into the punch. /ot enough to
hurt Christian, but enough for him to notice a difference. 'er fist made
contact with his face, and she felt pain flare up her arm. 3he didn't think
she was ever going to get used to that.
Christian rolled his eyes, but looked as if the punch didn't cause him pain,
but 2issa and I both knew it did. 'e clasped his hands together, and said
-#kay, 2iss. ake another shot.-
2issa had pulled her arm up, when there was suddenly a knock on the door,
then it opened to reveal %imitri. 'e looked from 2issa's arm, still pulled
back, to Christian, who was obviously bracing himself for the ne!t punch.
2issa dropped her arm, shocked, and Christian smiled a little.
-his isn't what it looks like,- 2issa said, indicating between her and
Christian, a little embarrassed. -0e aren't fighting;-
-'e's teaching you how to fight$- %imitri guessed, allowing himself a little
smile.
3eeing that smile, made me smile.
-#h, well then it is what it looks like,- 2issa said looking up from her feet,
her face still a little flushed.
%imitri cleared his throat and looked around the room, his eyes rested on
2issa and I saw that devotion flash in his eyes. I couldn't help but feel a
stab of +ealousy. -I +ust saw &ose,- he announced.
-0hat$- 2issa e!claimed, -I have been trying to get down there and I can't.-
-I told her +ust to compel them.- Christian added, a smirk on his face.
-here are too many guardians around her.-
-I +ust asked,- %imitri said, that small smile still playing on his lips.
-0hat did she say, is she okay$- 2issa asked, worry radiating through the
bond and in her eyes.
-3he wants me to do something, and I'm going to need your help,- %imitri
said, his voice hesitant.
2issa didn't hesitate, her voice strong and sure when she answered. -#kay,
anything. 0e're in.-
-0e need to get her out of +ail.-
here was a silence in the room, and then 2issa spoke, -&ose, I know you're
probably listening. 0e're coming to get you.-
0ith that I left her head, knowing that her and %imitri would come up with
a sound plan. A plan that was going to get me out of this +ail, and hopefully a
step closer to clearing my name. #r at the very least something that would
help 2issa in the future, if I was e!ecuted.
I felt a sharp pain, radiating from my heart, at +ust the thought of leaving
2issa. 0hen I went to &ussia, I felt like I lost half of myself, and it had felt
+ust as horrible to her. &obert's face flashed before my eyes. he way he
lived in fear and paranoia, secluded in a cabin where the only person he was
willing to see was his brother. 'e lost a shadow<kissed guardian, it made him
that way.
And I vowed, in that +ail cell surrounded by 6od knows how many guardians,
that I was not going to let that happen to 2issa. I was going to protect her,
no matter what. I had to stay alive, I had to live.
I had to keep her safe, even if it was the last thing I would do.
Chapter =
It was about two thirty, in the afternoon, when I felt it through the bond,
ringing loud and clear1 an!iety. It was time. I sat straight up on my cot, I
had been laying on the cot all afternoon, looking up at the ceiling, counting
how many cracks were in the surface of the old building. 2et's +ust say there
was a lot, and it had occupied my mind for the last couple of hours.
he door at the end of the hall opened, and in stepped ,ikhail, his face
perfectly neutral, but I felt like he was in on this plan. 'e looked up and
caught my eye, and only a tiny nod of his head indicated that he was indeed
here to help me. I let out a breath I didn't even realize I was holding, and
prepared myself for battle.
,ikhail stopped in front of my cell and nodded to the two guards standing
there. -4ou guys need a break$- he asked.
-I'm not sure,- one of my guards replied, he was the tallest of the three, his
black hair cut short, probably to keep it out of his face during a fight. 'e
was the strong, muscular type, but that was the only thing he had going for
him.
-3he's not going anywhere,- ,ikhail said, looking at me through the bars,
-and you guys have been down here all day. I'll stay down here while you take
a break.-
he other guardian, a short, stocky man that was balding on top looked over
at his partner. -0hat do you say 'erald,- he asked, -a ten minute break$-
he tall one, 'erald, pursed his lips in consideration, and I silently prayed he
would +ust go. After what seemed like hours, 'erald finally answered, -I
don't see what it could hurt, (almer.-
-hanks ,ikhail,- (almer said, -it's been miserable down here. /o action.
I've been itching to know what's been going on up there.-
'erald grunted his agreement and they started off down the hall. -/o
problem guys,- ,ikhail said after them, +ust as the door closed behind them.
hen something, or rather someone, was slammed against the door, making a
loud thump. hen there were a series of grunts. As soon the door had closed
behind the other guardians ,ikhail started digging in his pockets for his
keys, finally he found them and unlocked the cell door.
I ran out of the cell and started running toward the door, I felt ,ikhail
right behind me. -hank you,- I breathed, -so much.-
,ikhail didn't answer me as we busted through the door, knocking the body
slumped against it out onto the floor. 0e were in a little hallway with
another door +ust beyond it, one that had to be unlocked with a keycard.
%imitri and 'erald were in the middle of the little hallway, circling each
other with such grace that it would put any dancer to shame. %imitri's arm
snaked out, heading toward 'erald's head, but he barely dodged the punch.
I saw his hand heading toward the walkie talkie that was secured at his hip,
and I ran forward, knocking the walkie talkie out of it's holder and onto the
floor. I dove for it, and threw it against the wall, watching in grim
satisfaction has it fell broken to the ground.
'erald looked back in surprise, apparently having not heard us come through
the door, and that was the opening %imitri needed. 'e kicked 'erald in the
stomach, sending him flying toward the wall, beside me. I then grabbed him
by the neck, and slammed his head against the door handle, sending his
unconscious body to the ground.
-0hat now$- I asked %imitri.
'e came over to me and reached into his pocket, bringing out a shiny silver
ring and placing it on my finger. As soon as the ring was on my finger he
dropped my hand, as if he didn't want to touch me. I instantly felt my heart
breaking, but I pushed it aside. I could fall apart over %imitri later, right
now I was trying to help change the world.
-2issa$- I asked.
'e nodded.
hrough the bond I felt 2issa using her compulsion on the guards that were
stationed at the top level, she was waiting for us and all the %hampirs had
really high resistance to her compulsion, she didn't know how long she could
last.
I instantly felt horrible for making her use spirit so much lately. 9irst with
getting )ictor out of +ail, then with %imitri and the charms, and finally with
me. 3he might feel fine now, and spirit made her feel alive and wonderful,
but that didn't mean it wouldn't affect her later.
,ikhail stepped over the bodies, silent, and opened the door with his
keycard. As soon as the door was open I was running down the hall, trying to
escape these cells. %imitri ran after me, and grabbed me by the wrist, his
fingers biting deep into my skin, and turned me around. I was instantly aware
of how close we were, my body only inches from his. I felt my heart stop in
my chest, my breathing growing heavy. -%on't run,- he hissed, looking down
at the ring on my finger, -you'll look suspicious.-
I nodded and he released his hold on me, stepping away as he did so.
As we walked down the twists and turns of the hallway we came to a room
that was full of guardians, they turned around at our arrival and starred at
me. here were desks sitting throughout the room, and filing cabinets that
lined the room. I held my breath, hoping that they couldn't see through
2issa's charm.
#f course, I had no such luck. /othing could ever go according to plan, could
it$
-0hat is 'athaway doing out of her cell$- 3omeone asked, their voice loud
and shocked.
0e instantly went into defense mood, %imitri and I, back to back, circling
and surveying our targets. I *uickly counted that there were ten guardians in
here, ten of the *ueens guardians, the best of the best.
I easily took out the first guardian that tried to get me, sending him flying
to the ground. I looked at the desk beside me and took the paper weight,
hitting him across the head and making him pass out.
he guardian standing closest to me tried to grab my arms, but I dodged his
attempt and punched him in the face. hat made him stagger and I kicked
him, sending him flying into the wall. 'e landed on one of the filing cabinets,
his head snapping back and hitting the edge. Another guardian was on me
now, and he was doing good at dodging my kicks and punches.
8ehind me I heard %imitri taking out several of the guardians, and ,ikhail
was in the corner, fighting with three guardians.
he guardian in front of me was +oined by the guardian that I had +ust sent
flying to the wall. I finally had the opening I need and kicked the second
guardian again, this time making him stagger only a little. I leaped up and
kicked him again, sending him into the back of another guardian. he first
guardian charged me, and I went to the ground. 'e was reaching toward his
pocket, probably to cuff me, when someone flung him off of me.
I looked up and saw %imitri, having already took care of the four guards that
were on him. I shot him a grateful smile, and the last guardian came rushing
toward us again. ,y arm snaked out, hitting him on the side of the head. 'e
staggered and I kicked his legs out from under him, sending him to the floor,
his head hitting the side of a desk on it's way down.
0e ran out of that room, and up several flights of steps. I instantly felt
guilty. hose were the good guys, my guys, the guardians. I felt like I was
fighting for the side of evil, again, and I looked over at %imitri. 'is face was
blank, but in his eyes I saw that it was hurting him to fight those guardians,
and I wondered if it brought back memories of him fighting as a 3trigoi.
0e finally made it to 2issa, who was compelling four of the guards at the
front desk at the same time. 3he was growing frantic.
-9inally,- she grumbled, -I don't know how much longer I can hold them.-
-ell them to fight each other,- I commanded, although it sounded more like
a suggestion.
-I want you to fight each other,- she ordered, her voice loud and
commanding. here was a moment of hesitation in them all. -/ow,- she said,
her voice firm, -and don't stop until you are all unconscious.- hey all
hesitated again, then finally one lounged himself at the guardian standing
ne!t to him, taking her down to the ground. hat started them all fighting.
hey were so graceful in their moves, so swift and determined, that it was
all I could do not to stare at them.
-2et's go,- %imitri said, his voice soft. I looked over at him, and saw the pain
in his eyes.
'e's hurting because of you. I thought, feeling so guilty. I wanted to reach
out and s*ueeze his hand, but I knew that he didn't want to touch me, he
didn't want my comfort.
#nce we were out on the grounds of the court, I didn't get many suspicious
stares, mostly glances from one or two people, but the more they looked at
me, the less they could actually see &ose. hey were seeing the person 2issa
had charmed me to look like, and for that I was grateful. he court was still
in a frantic state, with guardians and ,oroi running around. 3ome people still
had tears running down there cheeks, while others kept glancing over their
shoulders, as if they were afraid to be here. Afraid to be at one of the
safest places in the world.
-0here are we going$- I asked.
-o the garage,- %imitri answered, -Christian is waiting for us there.-
-&ose$- ,ikhail asked, hesitant. -0hat are you going to do$-
hrough the bond I felt 2issa's worry and curiosity. %imitri hadn't told her
why I wanted to get out of +ail, +ust that I simply had something to do,
something so huge that it could change our world. 2issa had been curious as
to what I needed to do that could be so important.
I had to decide if I was going to tell 2issa the truth. 'er heart would be
broken, her heart was broken when she found out what Andre did to ,ia,
and she didn't even like ,ia then. It hurt her so much because the image
that she always held of her brother was of how perfect he was. 'e was
involved with all the right things, and was so likeable. 3he viewed her
parent's in much of the same way, and I hated to be the one that ruined
that image for her. his involved her dad, the person she loved and adored,
cheating on her mom. I didn't know if I could tell her right now, especially
after she had been using so much magic. %imitri caught my eye, and I
decided I was going to protect her heart. I was going to lie to her.
-I have something to do,- I said vaguely, earning a hard glare from ,ikhail.
-I'm going with you,- 2issa hissed, -no matter what, I'm going with you.- I
could feel how serious she was. 3he was devoted to me, committed, and no
matter what she wanted to help me. -Christian is too.-
-2issa<- I began, but she cut me off.
-I want to do this. I want to help you. 4ou were willing to lose everything, to
lose %imitri, +ust to help me.- I looked over at %imitri, his eyes hard and
focused straight ahead. -I never get to help you, you're always protecting
me, but now it's my turn again. It's my turn to help you. I need to help you,-
she pleaded, her eyes bright.
I wanted 2issa to come with me, I needed her to really. I needed to know
that she was okay, and that someone was going to protect her. here was a
killer on the lose, and I didn't want to have to constantly worry about if she
was okay or if she was +ust seconds away from her untimely death. If she
was with me I could protect, me and %imitri, +ust like old times.
.ust like old times.
,aybe if %imitri and I were protecting her again, getting into our regular
routine, it wouldn't be so hard for him to be around me. ,aybe he would
remember what it was like when we were together and in love.
-#kay,- I sighed.
-Are you sure<- %imitri began, voicing his concern over 2issa's safety.
-4es,- I snapped, -I know what's best for 2issa. I'm her guardian.-
%imitri was silent for several moments, and I looked at him from the corner
of my eyes. I didn't like yelling at him, certainly not pointing out that I was a
guardian and he wasn't, but spirit's side affects where starting to affect
my mood. -#kay,- he whispered, -you've done a great +ob protecting her. I
trust you.-
2issa felt horrible for me, but she also felt horrible for %imitri. 3he loved
us both, and seeing us do this to each other was tearing her up on the inside.
0e walked the rest of the way to the garage in a semi<comfortable silence,
thanking our lucky stars that no one seemed to recognize me.
Christian was leaning against one of the cars, and was smirking as we walked
in. -0hat took you so long, &ose$ I thought a badass like you would only take
a few seconds to break out of +ail and beat the shirt out of some guards.-
I snorted. -rust me, it would have taken you much longer with the way
you've been throwing punches.-
'e smirked and I smiled, I had missed him and he was a good person to have
around during crazy plans. I was so lucky that my friends were on board with
a lot of my weird adventures.
,ikhail, who had been silent for pretty much this whole ordeal, threw
%imitri a set of keys. -4ou're taking the %odge. (op the trunk-
-0hoa,- I said, holding my hands in the air, -I'm not getting back into the
trunk.-
%imitri raised an eyebrow, a slightly amused e!pression on his face, but
popped the trunk like ,ikhail had asked.
-4ou have to, &ose.- ,ikhail said. -4ou're charm has worked with a lot of
people, but some of the guardians can see past it, we can't take the risk of
them recognizing you.-
I knew he was right, but of course it was in my nature to argue with
everything. -he whole court is probably on lockdown right now: he *ueen
died: 3he was murdered at court: hey aren't going to let anyone in or out,
2issa's going to have to use compulsion on the guards anyway:-
-&ose,- ,ikhail breathed, -please get in the trunk. 0e need to get you out of
here.-
I sighed and opened my mouth to, grudgingly, agree when I heard a shriek.
I turned around to see ,ia &inaldi coming into the garage, her hand thrown
over her mouth, her eyes intently glued on me. 3he stared at me for several
seconds before saying anything, probably fighting the charm to see who I
really was. -&ose,- she said, her voice shaky, -what the hell are you doing$-
-6reat,- ,ikhail said, -she can see you.-
-0e have to go,- I said. 2issa went and sat in the front seat of the car, while
Christian slid into the backseat.
-6o$- ,ia asked, raising her eyebrows, -6o where$-
0e all stayed silent, none of us actually knew where we were going. 0e +ust
knew we were leaving. 0hen it was evident we weren't going to answer her
*uestion she opened the car door and slid into the backseat. -I'm going,- she
announced. I opened my mouth to ob+ect, but she put her finger up, today
must have been I'm<going<to<interrupt<everything<&ose<has<to<say<day. I
sighed and crossed my arms over my chest, waiting for her to continue. -he
last time I helped out with some crazy plan of yours this happened,- she
gestured toward %imitri, -and I'm not missing it this time. I'm coming. (lus,
it's got to be more fun than eating damn popsicles all day.-
-3he could help us,- Christian pointed out, -she's done this kind of thing
before, in high school.-
-3he's pretty good at compulsion,- 2issa added, -for a water user.-
-I'm pretty good at compulsion for anyone.-
-I don't like the idea of getting too many ,oroi involved,- %imitri said,
speaking up for the first time in a while.
-I can take care of myself,- ,ia insisted, -I've been training for months. I
can help protect 2issa and Christian in the 'real world'-
3he had a point, she could prove valuable, and 2issa was right, her compulsion
was good for a water user. If 2issa felt too weak to keep a hold on anyone,
,ia could help.
-#kay, ,ia, you can come.-
-&ose, you have to go before someone realizes your gone, those guys aren't
going to stay unconscious forever.- ,ikhail was glancing back and forth
an!iously, keeping a look out for any guardians that could hold up our plans.
-hank you for your help ,ikhail,- I sighed. I slid into the trunk, not too
happy about the seating arrangements. -I hope this doesn't become a weekly
occurrence.- I also hoped breaking in and out of +ail wouldn't become a
weekly occurrence, but I didn't voice that out loud.
-'ow many times have you been in the back of the trunk$- Christian asked.
-And why$- ,ia asked, her eyebrows still raised.
-#nly once,- 2issa muttered, rolling her eyes, -and it's a long story.-
%imitri grunted and got into the drivers seat, everyone closed their doors
and ,ikhail came over to close the trunk. -&ose,- he said, looking down at me,
his eyes wide with wonder, -I don't know what you're doing, and I don't want
to know, but be careful.-
0ith that he slammed the trunk shut, and %imitri started the car. At least
I have the trunk to myself this time, I thought as the car started to make
it's way toward the gates. After these gates opened the rest of our lives
were going to change, our whole world could possibly change, and it all rested
on this second %ragomir.
Chapter >
%imitri was driving faster than ,ikhail did the day he helped sneak us out of
court, and I decided to watch what was happening through 2issa, which would
be a lot better than seeing the blackness of the trunk. I didn't like being
confined to this trunk, it reminded me of my +ail cell, and although I didn't
spend a lot of time in there, I could end up in one for a long time, until my
death even.
I easily went into 2issa's head, watching what she was seeing. 0e were
speeding through court, fast enough to get away in a hurry but not fast
enough to attract too much attention. 0e were passing the royal housing
when we saw him. Adrian.
2issa spotted his aura +ust as we passed his house. 'e was sitting outside on
a wooden bench, with a pair of designer sunglasses on. 'e had a drink in one
hand, a cigarette in the other, and an almost empty bottle of vodka sitting
beside him.
Adrian had spotted the car before 2issa had seen him, and he was already
taking his sunglasses off to get a better look at the people inside. 'is eyes
briefly rested on 2issa, before they turned to glare at %imitri. I had never
seen him looking at anyone with that amount of hatred before in my life.
'e can't see you, he can't see you. 'e can't possibly know what I'm doing. I
panicked. I knew that he would eventually find out, but I was hoping he find
out with the rest of court, hopefully when we were hundreds of miles away. I
didn't want him to follow us. .udging by the way he +ust kept sitting there,
staring at the car as it passed by, getting further and further away, he
wasn't going to. I let out a *uick sigh of relief.
I instantly felt like shit. 'ere I was escaping from the court with my e!<
boyfriend and best friends, while my boyfriend sat outside trying to ease
the pain that the past couple of days had caused him. he pain that I caused
him.
I didn't deserve him. 5ver since %imitri returned I had caused Adrian pain,
and when his aunt got murdered, that caused him even more pain. I knew
there was only so much that I could do before Adrian stopped forgiving me
for all the pain. 'e said that he could never hate me, and I did pick him, but
that was because %imitri had said he didn't love me anymore.
2ove fades.
8ut if %imitri ever gave me the chance to be with him again, I don't t know
what I would do. I needed Adrian in my life, and I thought I loved him, but I
did love %imitri. 5very part of me loved %imitri, and every part of me needed
him.
Adrian looks so sad. 2issa said, speaking to me through the bond. I wish
there was something we could do to help him.
,e too. I thought, hating the one sided bond.
0e finally made it to the front gate, when %imitri spoke. 'e was the first to
break the silence since locking me in the trunk, and everyone was nervous
about what was about to come. If they found me in the trunk, it was most
likely lead to a fight.
-2issa,- %imitri said, -let's try talking to the guard first and if that doesn't
work you can use your compulsion on him.-
2issa nodded, after the ordeal she went through earlier she was still feeling
tired and worn out, but was fairly sure she could compel the guard to open
the gate, if not she knew ,ia could help.
%imitri rolled down his window as the guardian came running up to the car.
-0hat are you doing$- 'e shouted. -/o one can go in or out:-
%imitri, using his instructor voice, stayed calm. -It's an emergency. 0e need
to get out.-
-I don't care,- the man said, his voice rising even more, -not only is the
*ueen dead but that 'athaway girl is missing:- he man then seemed to
realize who he was talking to, and register everyone in the car. -0ait a
minute;you're her best friend and you;- his eyes were flicking between
%imitri and 2issa -you were, are, her instructor.-
I couldn't believe that I had only been out of my cell for thirty minutes and
they already realized that I was missing: hese guys worked fast, and if we
didn't get out of here soon there was a good chance that we were going to
get caught. I didn't even want to think about all the trouble everyone was
going to be in because of me.
-2issa,- %imitri said his voice barely above a whisper.
0hen the guy locked eyes with 2issa she used every ounce of her energy to
compel him. -0e need you to open the gate, now.-
he man +ust looked at her, neither obeying nor moving to obey. -%idn't you
hear me<-before he finished his sentence the compulsion started to work its
magic, and his eyes glazed over.
-.ust do it: /ow: hen forget you ever saw us.-
9inally, after several moments of hesitation, the man moved to open the
gate. %imitri floored the gas, speeding away from court as fast as the car
would move. 'e didn't stop until the gates were well out of sight, then he
pulled over roughly. 'e popped the trunk, and then he came to help me out,
even going as far as lending me a hand. ,y heart started to swell, I was so
thankful for him and everyone in the car. hey were risking a lot, and they
didn't even know why. hey had so much faith in me.
-&oza,- he breathed, -were you okay back there.-
I nodded, and he let go of my hand. &oza. 'e called me &oza: ,y heart was
practically singing.
I slid into the backseat, taking ,ia's seat and forcing her into the middle
seat. -I hate being in the middle,- she complained, -especially on long car
rides.-
-I hate being in the trunk,- I said and ,ia rolled her eyes, -ne!t time you
can ride back there.-
-0hat now$- Christian asked.
hat was a really good *uestion. 0hen I talked to 3ydney she said that the
bank accounts were sat up in 2as )egas, and the man at the casino had told
us as much. 2as )egas sounded like a reasonable place to start but;there
were records with the alchemist. 5ven though the paper copies were stolen,
they had everything stored digitally. 6etting access to those records could
help us get closer to 2issa's half sibling. I had asked 3ydney if I could know
the details, and she had said no, but maybe if I was down there, begging her
or forcing her, she would give them to me. After all she wanted to please
Abe, and even if she didn't hand them over there were other ways to get a
copy, like breaking in which I seemed to be doing a lot of lately.
-0e need to get on a flight to /ew #rleans.-
-/ew #rleans$- Christian asked, a smirk coming over his face, -0e already
missed ,ardi 6ras, &ose.-
-4ou forgot, 9ire boy, the party follows us, we don't follow the party.-
A few hours later we were in the air flying to /ew #rleans. I was careful not
to use my card to pay for anything" I didn't want to leave a trail for Adrian
to follow. Christian, ,ia and 2issa sat in front of %imitri and I. I was so
tired that I fell asleep as soon as I sat down, and as soon as my eyes drifted
shut, Adrian was with me.
'e didn't bring me anywhere fancy, and he didn't dress me. 0e were sitting
on the bench in front of his house at court, and it was nighttime. he night
sky was twinkling with a million burning stars" the moon was full and glowing.
4ou would think that since we lived at night we would get tired of the
ma+estic beauty of the night, and I did miss the sun, but the night never lost
its magic.
-2ittle %hampir.- Adrian's voice was soft and gentle against the night
breeze. -0hat have you done$-
-I'm doing something that will help 2issa, something that will give her the
power she deserves:-
-%id that mean you had to break out of +ail while you are on trial for killing
my aunt$- his time Adrian's voice wasn't gentle, it was harsh and accusing.
-3omething's can't wait: I have to do this for 2issa:- I started playing with
the /azar around my neck, my eyes falling to the ground.
-4ou're with him aren't you.- It didn't sound like a *uestion, it was more
accusatory, but I felt the need to answer it anyway.
-4es but<- I began, but he cut me off.
-8ut what$ 0hy didn't you come to me$ %on't you think I want to help you$-
'is voice was harsher, his words cutting deep into my skin.
-'e came to me.- I whispered.
-#f course he did, 8elikov to the rescue:- Adrian said.
-3top that: 'e's +ust trying to help:-
-%on't you know that I need you right now &ose$ ,y aunt was +ust
murdered, and you're the prime suspect: I need you:- Adrian was right, he
needed me. I knew he was hurting, and I +ust left, not even thinking about
how that would hurt him too.
-I'm sorry,- I whispered, standing up and going to him. I threw my arms
around his neck, and drew him closer to me. 'is kissed my neck, then
brought his lips up to mine, kissing me gently. I pulled back and looked at
him, -but 2issa needs me too.-
-I know.- Adrian whispered, kissing me on the forehead. -I +ust wish you
were here, with me.-
-I wouldn't technically be with you,- I teased, -I'd be locked in a +ail cell.-
-I'd still feel better if you were near.-
-I know,- I whispered, -I miss you too.-
-I love you little %hampir.- 'is eyes were so sincere, so devoted and loving.
he more time I spent with %imitri, the more I realized that I really didn't
deserve Adrian, and I knew that in the end I was going to hurt him so bad
that our relationship would be damaged forever, and the thought made me
sad.
0ith that Adrian left my dream, allowing me to return back to my own
dreams. 0hen I woke up I was leaning against %imitri's shoulder, his duster
thrown over me to keep me warm. Almost the same way I woke up on the day
of the mall trip, when we were falling in love. he plane was descending into
/ew #rleans, and I was feeling more confused than ever.
-2issa,- I said, leaning over the seat and whispering into her ear, -I need you
to make another charm for me.'
-0hat kind$- 3he asked, already reaching into her bag to bring out some
silver.
-#ne that won't allow Adrian into my dreams.-
3he nodded and got to work charming another little ring. I hated doing that,
especially when I knew how bad it was going to make him feel, but I needed
time to think.
I realized that I was still wrapped up in %imitri's coat, and brought it up to
my nose, breathing in his wonderful scent. I missed a lot of things when
%imitri was a 3trigoi, but one of the things I missed the most was his scent.
I looked up and saw %imitri looking at me, his eyes shinning with an emotion
that hadn't been in them in a long, long time.
-hank you, comrade.- I said, handing him back his coat.
-4ou're welcome,- he whispered, his accent lovely and deep.
0hen the plane landed we checked into a hotel. 0e had to get two rooms,
%imitri took one room and we took the other. As soon as we were in the room
I made a call to the only person I knew in /ew #rleans.
-3ydney, I'm in /ew #rleans and I need your help.-
Chapter ?
o say 3ydney wasn't e!actly happy to hear from me was an
understatement. 3he, like everyone else in the vampire world, had already
heard about the murder of the *ueen and the prime suspect of said murder.
After she calmed down enough to carry on a conversation, and after she
kept muttering that the evil creatures of the night would be the death of
her, we sat plans to meet up the follow morning at the restaurant down
stairs.
-&ose,- she said, her voice e!asperated, -I wish the circumstances were
different but I am happy I get to see you.-
-3ee$ I'm not too bad to be an evil creature of the night, right$-
3he snorted and hung up. After I told 2issa our plans she and Christian
immediately fell asleep, neither of them having slept on the plane, leaving me
and ,ia to do as we pleased. It came as no surprise to me that she wanted to
practice fighting.
0e were outside our rooms, practicing in the grass by the pool, which was
tempting me to +ump in despite the fact that the pool was closed. @nlike the
court the night here was angry, the dark grey clouds threatening to pour
rain down on us any moment. he humidity was thick in the air, making me
sweat before we even began.
-3how me what you got, little girl,- I teased, and I so wasn't e!pecting her
to bring it.
'er fist reached out, knocking me from the side of my face and sending my
head back. o say I was shocked was to say the least. 'er fist then made
contact with my stomach, forcing me to double over. It wasn't so much that
it hurt, but the fact that it came from ,ia. I couldn't believe it.
I was able to dodge her punches after that, even landing a lot of my own.
9inally, after many blows and kicks, I got the opening I needed. I ran into
her, sending her flying to the ground, and I was holding her shoulders down.
I leaned down and brushed my teeth against her neck, -6ot cha,- I
whispered in her ear, laughter e!ploding between the two of us.
-hat was a good fight though,- I added, rolling onto the grass beside her,
-for a ,oroi.- It was starting to sprinkle now, and the rain felt good against
my heated skin
-4ou learned from the best though,- ,ia pointed out, her breathing heavy.
-4eah,- I whispered, my words disappearing into the night air, -he's pretty
badass.-
-&ose$- A voice asked from the shadows of the bushes, the lovely &ussian
accent music to my ears. 3peaking of the devil. 'e stepped forward, the
shadows falling behind him and his face coming into view. -Can I talk to you$-
,ia looked between the two of us, and raised her eyebrows. I nodded and
she rose, walking back towards our room. -I'm going to be in the room:- 3he
shouted as she made her way up the stairs.
After she left %imitri and I sat in silence. -%o you want to take a walk with
me$- he asked, walking over to me and offering me his hand. #nce again I
eagerly took it, and he helped me get back on my feet. 0e started walking
on the stone trail that lead from the pool to a small garden filled with
blooming flowers. 'e led us to a small bench that was snuggled beside two
large rose bushes, we sat down and I plucked a rose, tearing the petals off
the flower one by one. I watched as the petals fell, making a red pool around
my feet.
'e loves me, he loves me not. 'e loves me, he loves me not.
-&ose,- %imitri said, shifting his eyes, I could tell that he was
uncomfortable. I couldn't tell if it was because he was so close to me, or the
sub+ect he was about to bring up, but I silently sat and listened. -,y mother
said hello.-
#ut of everything I e!pected %imitri to say, that wasn't anywhere close. I
met his mother, #lena 8elikova, while I was hunting %imitri in &ussia. I had
also meet his sisters and his grandmother, and I even stayed with them for a
while. 'is youngest sister, )iktoria, and I became real good friends during
my stay, only to have everything destroyed the night before I left. Although
that was a horrible time in my life that I didn't like to think of, hunting my
lover and slaying 3trigoi, I did miss %imitri's family.
-3he also said,- %imitri continued, a small smile turning up the corners of his
lips, -that she sends her love, so does )iktoria.-
I smiled in return, it seemed like )iktoria's hatred of me had diminished a
little over time. -0hen did you talk to them$-
-hey heard about what happened and contacted me at court a couple of
days ago. I would have told you sooner but it didn't seem important at the
time.- %imitri's eyes grew soft, and I could tell that he was thinking about
his family and his home. 'e missed them, I realized. I missed them, so I
couldn't imagine how %imitri was feeling.
-hey miss you.- I finished plucking all the petals off the rose and reached
for another.
-hey miss you too.- 'is voice was so *uiet, so unsure, that I wondered if he
meant for me to hear him.
-I miss them too.-
-hey love you.-
I smiled, my memories of them bittersweet, but I was certain of one thing. I
loved them. -I love them too.-
0e sat there in silence for a couple of moments, and I continued to pick the
petals off my rose.
'e loves me, he loves me not. 'e loves me, he loves me not.
-&oza.- I looked up from picking my petals. 'is voice was so intense, so lovely
and accented, so full of emotion, that it shocked me. 'e almost sounded like
the old %imitri. he %imitri I knew and loved. he %imitri that loved me. -I
am so, so sorry.-
-I've already forgiven you.- I said immediately, no hesitation on my part. It
was true. I had forgiven him a long time ago, I realized that what %imitri did
while he was a 3trigoi didn't matter. he only thing that did matter was that
he was normal again. 'e could go back to being the old %imitri. I knew that it
would take time, but I was willing to wait for him as long as he needed me to
wait. 2ove is patient.
-0hy$- 'e asked, his voice was still intense, but there was a fire in his eyes.
I glint that I hadn't seen for far too long. It almost looked like love and
passion, and it was directed at me. ,y heart was fluttering in my chest. 'is
eyes didn't look dead, he looked alive. Alive and happy. Alive and loving.
-8ecause I love you.- he answer was out of my lips before I had time to
consider my wording, but it was that simple. I loved him. I always had, and I
always would. &ight there, sitting in that garden with the night sky
surrounding us and my love by my side, I knew without a doubt that he would
always be the person that I loved. I could try to move on, I could date other
people and I could love them, but my love for %imitri would never fade, even
if his did.
-4ou shouldn't.- 'is voice was harsh, cutting into my skin far deeper than
Adrian's words ever would. -I did horrible things to you, and not +ust to you,
to a lot of people.-
,y hand reached for his before my mind could tell me not too. I let my
finger trail down his hand, and I gave his hand a soft s*ueeze. -hat wasn't
you,- I said, my voice firm and unwavering, -you are not that person.-
-I was that person,- %imitri said, the fire gone from his eyes, -I did harm to
people. I didn't protect anyone and I killed everyone in my path" all to get to
you.-
-It doesn't matter,- I whispered, my voice sounding fragile, -not anymore.
4ou are not that person anymore. 4ou changed back:-
'is hand was still so warm in mine, so real. -A lot of things have to change.-
hose words shattered my heart all over again. -0hat things$-
-,e and you,- he whispered, -we have to change.-
-/o,- my voice *uavered, -we don't have to. /othing has to change.-
-5verything already has.-
-/o it hasn't,- I insisted, my voice rising again, -you still read your corny old
western books and wear that cowboy duster: 4ou threw yourself in front of
the *ueens guardians to keep me safe. 4ou helped me escape from +ail:
/othing has changed, and nothing has too:-
-0hat do you want me to say$- 'e asked, his voice matching mine. -hat I
love you$ 8ecause I can't say that,- he withdrew his hand from mine, and my
heart sunk, -I can't say that yet, &ose: I don't know if I can ever say that
to you again:-
-I +ust want to hear you say you will try.-
'e opened his mouth to say something else, but I cut him off. -I +ust want
you to give me hope,- I whispered. -0hen you fell that day in the cave, my
soul shattered. I lost apart of myself: I felt like I couldn't be alive without
you, but I figured out how to get you back. 'ow to get a piece my soul back:
I +ust need you to give me hope: 'ope that my soul will one day be complete
again.-
'is words from the church suddenly came back to me, echoing in my head.
2ove fades.
-%on't you dare say love fades either: It doesn't: If you love someone you
always will, forever. /o amount of time will make that love fade. ,ine didn't
fade: 4ou +ust learn to live without that person, but you love them all the
same:-
'e sat there looking at me, his eyes shinning and I couldn't tell if it was
from tears or love. he rain was starting to come down more consistently, in
silent watery streaks. 'e didn't answer me for a long time, and I felt a tear
roll down my cheek. I raised my head to the watery tears falling from the
sky, letting the rain wash away my own tears.
I got up and started to walk back to my room, my world crumbling around me
again. I threw my unfinished rose down on the ground. 'e loves me not.
'e really didn't love me. 'e really didn't care anything about me. 0as any of
it real$ he kisses, the warm gestures, the cabin$ %id he ever really love
me$
-&ose,- his voice was soft and gentle, coming from behind me. I stood still
and didn't turn around. 'e walked up to me and grabbed my wrist, turning me
around and pulling me closer to him. he rain was falling even more, making
the world a grey haze. I was so close to him that I could feel his heat, and
my breathing hitched. I took my other hand in his, now holding both of my
hands close to his chest. -I'm going to try.- he words were barely more
than a whisper, caressing around me and seeming to make the world right
again.
-4ou will$- I whispered, shocked and happy not even beginning to e!plain how
I felt.
'e nodded, and that wonderful golden magic wrapped around us1 love. It felt
almost as beautiful and e!citing as 2issa's magic.
-2et's get you inside,- %imitri said, the rain falling down his face and
dripping off of his hair.
o my e!treme surprise and happiness %imitri held my hand in his until we
reached my door. -6oodnight, &ose. 3weet dreams.-
%reams. I wasn't going to see Adrian in my dreams tonight" I was blocking
him. I instantly felt like shit again, I was really screwing over Adrian and now
that %imitri said he was going to try, how was I going to face Adrian$
I said goodnight to %imitri and walked into the room, leaning against the
door. ,ia was looking at me intently, a smile on her face. 3he picked up the
pillow lying ne!t to her and threw it at me. -2ook at that smile:- 3he
s*ueaked, her eyes glowing.
-3hhh,- I hissed, looking at 2issa and Christian sleeping on the bed beside
her.
,ia rolled her eyes, that silly smile still glued to her face. I layed down on
the bed beside her, e!haustion setting in. I was almost asleep when ,ia
spoke again. -/ot to sound corny or anything, but after all that you two have
been through, you deserve to be happy.-
I fell asleep that night feeling more hope that night then I had since finding
out I could save %imitri, and guilt at the thought of breaking Adrian's heart.
Chapter A
It's summer,- I crooned, throwing my arms up and into the air, the breeze
whipping my strawberry blonde hair around me as it made its way through
the convertible. 0e rented the car from the airport and we let the top down
as soon as we got on the road, it made us feel free and spirited. -It's time
to party, party, party:- 0hich, ironically, was all we had been doing the past
couple of weeks. 8efore we came home for the summer Alina and I drove up
to 2aguna 8each where we partied nonstop all night, every night with the
humans. 8ut, in all seriousness, we had been partying all school year.
,y best friend, Alina, let out a scream, her voice fading in with the darkness
around us. -his is going to be the best summer ever: /e!t year we're going
to be +uniors:- 'er black hair was flying behind her, her bright blue eyes
shinning in the night. 3he threw her arms up into the air, the convertible
crossing into the lane beside us. I *uickly reached over and caught the
wheel, pulling the car back into the right lane, laughter e!ploding between
the two of us.
he lights of the city were surrounding us as we made our way home. 2as
)egas, he 8ig 5asy, 3in City, he 5ntertainment Capital of the 0orld,
whatever you wanted to call it, we +ust called it home. 0e had to stay at
school for most of the year and we only got to come home during the summer
and for Christmas. I went to school in the desert of California and it was
only the most boring place in the world, surrounded by nothing but cacti and
sand. he sprawling 6othic style school looked out of place in the middle of
nowhere but it gave us the one thing we needed the most1 privacy.
-0here to first$- Alina asked, looking at me from her drivers seat. -hat
bar that lets us in without having to use compulsion or are we going to go and
crash Abby Ivashkov's bonfire$-
At the mention of Abby Ivashkov I felt my good mood vanish. Abby was a
ma+or royal, her cousins great aunt was the *ueen, and Abby didn't even try
to act normal. 3he was a bitch, in a ma+or way, and a royal pain in my ass. 3he
liked to make fun of me and Alina because we didn't get into the social
politics of the school. 0e tried to lay as low as we could, hanging out mostly
with %hampirs. 5ven though Alina and I were ,oroi we both believed that we
should learn to fight because leaving it all to the %hampirs was unfair, not to
mention cruel and cowardly. I was proud that I was a air user and of the fact
that I could kick ass.
-oo many royals,- I muttered, rolling my eyes at the stupid suggestion.
-0hat's wrong with royals$- Alina asked, glaring at me. Alina was an #zera,
which was one of the twelve royal families, and she was cool to hang out with
mainly because she didn't act royal. ,ost royal's thought that they were
better than everyone else and they didn't socialize with non<royal ,oroi,
especially ones that came from poor families. 2ike me.
-/othing's wrong with royals,- I said, giving her a tiny smile, -+ust the
%ragomir line.-
Alina went from glaring at me to looking sorry for me. -%on't say that.-
-0hy$ It's true.-
-/o, it's not. 4ou don't even know her.- 3he had a point, but I wasn't going
to give in.
-I know of her. It's basically the same thing.-
Alina shook her head, a tiny smile forming on her lips. -/o, be nice. 8esides,
my distant cousin dates her or he used to.-
I had to bite my lips to keep from laughing. he distant cousin she was
talking about was Christian #zera, and her side of the family didn't socialize
with Christian or his aunt, asha. Christian's parents had turned 3trigoi, by
choice, which was something that our kind didn't take lightly. hey all but
shunned Christian and asha even though they were victims as well. Alina
felt sorry for him and wished that she could help him, at least talk to him,
but her parents strictly forbade it.
-Can we +ust drop it$- I snapped.
-#kay,- she muttered, staring straight ahead. I instantly felt bad, I was
already ruining summer vacation.
3uddenly I didn't want to go out anymore. I don't want to go and party. I'd
been partying enough the past couple of weeks, I was ready to go home. o
sleep in my bed. -I don't want to party tonight. I want to sleep.- I said,
answering her earlier *uestion.
-0hat$- 3he cried. ,e not wanting to party was one thing, but me wanting
to skip partying for sleep was unheard of. -It's the middle of the day.-
Again, she had a point but I was too stubborn to admit it.
-I didn't sleep on the plane.-
I saw Alina's face go from doubt to speculation. -4es you did.-
-I didn't get enough sleep on the plane,- I corrected, tilting my head to look
at the dimly glowing stars. hat was something that I missed about the
desert, the stars. hey always glowed so brightly. o me they seemed like
tear drops frozen in outer space, their beauty so ma+estic and otherworldly
that I felt lucky to live at night. 3ome people had to live during the day and
face the horrible sun, but we got the night. he sky was already turning a
dark blue as opposed to the normal +et black, indicting the sun would be
rising in a few hours.
-0hatever,- Alina breathed, rolling her eyes.
-Beep your eyes on the road.- I chastised. I already lost one person to a car
wreck, I didn't want to lose another and certainly not myself.
0e finally made it to my house, the sky turning a bright pink as we pulled
into the driveway. ,y house was small but pretty. It was a two bedroom,
little, gray house nestled on the corner of a nice neighborhood. he front
yard had a blooming garden full of all different kinds of flowers1 roses, lilies,
orchids, daisy's, on and on the list went. A little bench sat in the middle of
the garden, and there was a hanging swing on the wrap around porch. Alina
and I had spent many the night sitting on that porch, listening to the cars
pass by on the nearby road and the owls hooting in the woods that
surrounded our house. It might not have been much, but it was home and it
was sure nice to be back.
,y mom came out of the house, a tight smile on her face. I took one look at
her and knew something was wrong, that something happened. -'i girls,- she
said, that tight smile still plastered to her face. 'er light brown hair was
pulled up into a ponytail, showing off her heart shaped face. 'er brown eyes
looked cautious, reminding me that this women was not my mother, this
women was a wreck. ,y mother had a free spirit, her eyes always twinkling
and she was always in the party mood. 3he had calmed down a lot after she
got married, and sometimes I missed it being +ust the two of us, but I was
away at school all the time so it was selfish for me to wish away her
happiness.
Alina and I e!changed glances and looked back at my mother. -,om,- I
asked, my voice hesitant, -what's wrong$- ,y thoughts suddenly went to my
little brother, .ordan. 'e was the three year old son of my mom and her
husband, %ave, and I loved him more than anything in the world. %ave
dropped out of his 6uardian duties to marry my mom, something that was
also frowned upon in our world" another reason for Abby to make fun of me.
-Is .ordan okay$-
,y mom nodded. -It's the *ueen.-
I rolled my eyes. -0hat did she do this time$ 2ower the graduation age to
freshman$- 0hile I was at the beach I heard about the *ueens ridiculous
plan to lower graduation age to sophomore, something that was still being
fought about despite the ma+ority of the vote passing it. It scared the hell
out of me, I was a sophomore and most of my friends were, they could be
released into the world at any moment.
-3he's dead.-
-0hoa.- Alina breathed, her eyes going huge.
-'ow$- I asked, too shocked to think of anything else to ask. It seemed like
the most logical *uestion.
,y mom shook her head. -hey say it was )asilisa %ragomir's friend &ose
'athaway.-
I cringed at the mention of 2issa, but awed when I heard &ose's name. 3he
was a legend, and I strive to be like her despite the fact that I am a weak
,oroi and could never have her e!perience. I didn't, I couldn't, believe that
someone who committed their live to killing the evil killed the *ueen.
-3he didn't do it,- I whispered, even though I had no facts to support the
claim. #bviously they did or they wouldn't be blaming her.
-It doesn't matter,- my mom said, her voice hoarse, -she's gone.-
6one$ ,y mind +umped from gone to dead in two seconds. -hey killed her$-
I shrieked, tears forming in my eyes for the girl I didn't even know.
,y mom shook her head, her fake smile fading all together from her face.
-/o, she broke out of her cell.-
I opened my mouth to ob+ect to that too but my mother cut me off. -It's
rumored that )asilisa helped her, and that if they get caught, when they get
caught, they all could be facing +ail time or worse.-
Any ob+ections I wanted to voice got stuck in my throat. I might make fun of
2issa and at times say I hated her but the truth was I didn't know her. I
loved her with all of my heart, but hated that I didn't know her" that she
didn't know me. I felt tears coming to my eyes and suddenly they were
falling. Alina wrapped her arm around my waist while my mother wrapped her
arms around the both of us. -I'm so sorry,- she murmured against my hair,
-but she'll get her way out of this. hey both will.- 5ven as she said the
words I knew they were empty, their only purpose to make me feel better.
I felt a piece of my heart break off and disappear into a pool of blackness.
-I have to help her. I have to help them.-
,y mom *uickly shook her head. -/o. It's not your battle to fight.- 'er
voice was sharp and cold, like frozen tears in the night sky.
-I have to,- I whispered. -I have to help my sister.-
Chapter C
0e sat at a small, round table that was in the back corner of the restaurant.
0e might have been in the human world, but that didn't mean that the
vampires couldn't find us here. 4ou never knew where they could be, lurking
in the corners and waiting for their chance to prowl. I was still wearing
2issa's charm, the one that altered my appearance and made me look human.
I knew it was working on humans, they had absolutely no resistance to
compulsion but it wasn't the humans we were worried about.
-0hen is this 3ydney chick going to be here$- ,ia asked, eyeing the food on
the buffet table a couple of rows away. -I'm starving.-
I looked at her normally pale features, and found them even more washed
out. 3he wasn't +ust hungry for food, she needed her blood too. -0hen's the
last time you fed, ,ia$-
'er cheeks flushed a bright pink. -I didn't have time to feed yesterday, or
the day before.-
I let out a laugh and gave her a small smile. -2et me guess, you were too busy
fighting$-
3he nodded and %imitri spoke up. -0hen is 3ydney going to be here, &ose$
0e've been waiting for over an hour.-
I shrugged my shoulders. -0hy, comrade$ 4ou getting hungry too$- I
teased.
-I don't think it's a good idea to have you or the ,oroi out in a public human
space like this.-
2eave it to %imitri to be concerned over safety after we escaped the Court
together with the ,oroi.
-0e're surrounded by humans, nothing is going to happen.- I said, my voice
laced with a harshness.
-I wouldn't be so sure about that.-
-'e has a point, &ose.- 2issa said, her eyes resting on her hands. -%on't
forget )egas.-
I looked at %imitri and watched as his eyes hardened. -2issa.- I snapped,
glaring at her.
-I mean that was the last time you took us out of Court for one of your
missions. 0hich, by the way, are you ever going to tell us what we're doing$-
2uckily I didn't have to answer her *uestion, or come up with a carefully
crafted response that didn't give anything away. /ot that it would be a
secret for much longer because at that moment I saw 3ydney walk through
the door, her blonde hair swept up into an elegant bun and a small business
brief case in her hand. 3he saw me and glared at me. I shot a smile at her,
happy to see her. 'er glare softened and she gave me a smile in return, and
not a tight lip I<don't<want<to<be<here<but<I<have<to<be smile. It was a real
smile that radiated warmth and happiness.
-&ose,- she said, her voice tired, -I don't suppose you've killed anyone while
you've been here$-
3he sat in the chair ne!t to mine, and put her brief case in the floor
between us. 3he unfolded her napkin and sat it across her lap, she then
crossed her hands across her lap and looked around the table at my friends.
-hat was not my kill,- I confirmed, -is that what took you so long$-
3he nodded. -4ou must be (rincess )asilisa,- her gaze slid from 2issa to
Christian, -and her boyfriend Christian #zera.-
-/ice to meet you.- hey chimed together, their voices as intertwined as
their hands resting on the table.
3he looked at ,ia, a blank e!pression on her face, and raised an eyebrow.
-I'm not familiar with your file. 0hat's your name$-
-I'm ,ia.- 'er voice was firm, and she locked eyes with 3ydney. 3ydney, who
was trying to be nice, s*uirmed in her seat.
-/ice to meet you,- she muttered, and turned her gaze to %imitri.
'e was sitting on the other side of me, his brown hair pulled back into a
little ponytail, with a strand tucked behind his ear. 'is brown eyes were
focused on the wall ahead, and his face was e!pressionless. 'e looked and
meet 3ydney's gaze, his face never changing.
-4ou must be the %imitri 8elikov,- she breathed, sounding astonished. -I've
heard the rumors;so they are true$ &ose went all the way to 3iberia to hunt
for you before finally bringing you back to life in the 3tates. It's
impressive, all that she went through to save you.-
-I'm very grateful for everything that &ose has done for me.- %imitri said,
his voice neutral.
I saw his mask slip +ust a little as he looked over at me, revealing some
hidden emotion. 6ratitude.
3ydney snorted. -6rateful doesn't even begin to cover what you should be
feeling, you<-
-3ydney, now that you've meet everyone can we move on$ I'm not e!actly
supposed to be here, you know.- I interrupted, and %imitri shot me a
grateful look.
3he looked at me and the smile that she had worn since walking through the
door faltered. -&ose, your father told me to tell you that he knows where
you are. hat he can find out wherever you're going and that you can't hide
from him. Also, your mother is furious.- 3he said the words in a rush, running
them together. 3he looked down at her hands, so she didn't see the glare
that I shot her.
-4ou. old. Abe.- I said, my voice somewhere between a hiss and a shout.
-4ou. &atted. ,e. #ut.- I noticed that my +aw was tight, my teeth clenched
together.
-I had to, &ose,- she e!plained. -'e's my boss. I couldn't hide it from him,
think about what would happen if he found out and I didn't tell him about it.
I could have to go back to 3iberia.- 3he cringed at the last part and looked
at %imitri. -And you're a criminal, a suspected wanted in the murder of your
*ueen. I couldn't +ust hide it.-
,y anger was boiling and I wanted to scream at her. I felt that horrible
blackness in me, the result of 2issa using her magic so much the last couple
of days. I took a deep breath and counted to ten. -%id he say anything else$-
-o be careful.- 3he looked uncertain, like he said something else but she
didn't want to tell me what. -And not to get caught. hey could kill you.-
0ell that was +ust a perfect way to start the morning, talking about my
untimely death for something that wasn't my fault. I pushed my worries to
the back of my head. his meeting was about 2issa. &unning away was for
2issa. ,y life was devoted to 2issa and if I got caught, if I died, it would be
for something. It would be for 2issa.
-I need those papers.- I said bluntly, knowing she would know what papers I
was talking about.
-0ith everything going on your still worried about that$ 4ou want files on
2issa's father$-
-0ait. 0hat$- 2issa e!claimed, shock radiating through the bond. -0hy do
you want files on my father$-
-3ome of your fathers files went missing from the Alchemists, and we need
to get them.- I turned my attention back to 3ydney. -3o will you give them
to me or not$-
-/o, &ose.- 2issa said, her voice rising. -ell me what's in those files.- -I
don't know, okay.- hat wasn't technically a lie, I didn't know everything on
those files or I wouldn't be wasting my time here getting them.
-&ose.-
-hey went missing and I thought it was strange.-
-4our lying.- o speak the words scared her. I broke out of +ail to get files
on her dad, there had to be something huge in them. 3omething that could
change the world, or at the very least her world. 3he was nervous and
scared, and betrayed.
-Can I +ust e!plain later, please$- I didn't want to get into all of this in
front of everyone. I wanted to e!plain to her when it was +ust the two of us,
in private.
A tear rolled down her cheek and Christian s*ueezed her hand. -2issa, it's
okay. 0e'll all talk about this later.-
-Is it really bad$-
-I don't know.-
0e all feel silent, and looked at each other. -5!cuse me,- 2issa said, standing
up and walking away.
-3orry,- Christian said, following her out of the room.
I wanted to go after her, to comfort her, but I had business to take care of
here.
-I'm sorry too, but I'm starving.- ,ia said, getting up and going to get her
food.
-Are you giving me the files or not$- I asked 3ydney again.
-&ose I already told you<-
-If you don't hand them over I will break into your office, I will steal those
files, I will get everything I need to help me.- I felt a little bad about
threatening her, but it faded. I didn't have time to waste breaking into her
office and stealing those files. It would be so much easier if she would +ust
hand over the files.
3ydney pursed her lips, narrowing her eyes at me.
-&ose, calm down.- %imitri said, then he did something incredible. 'e
reached under the table and gently took my hand, almost as if he was forcing
himself to touch me. 8ut it was a start, and it distracted me from my anger
for a moment. 'is long fingers ran over mine, grasping them.
I suddenly flashed back to the night in the cabin. ,e going out of control
and %imitri being there to calm me down. I could feel how his lips felt
against mine, his lips traveling down my neck and kissing the e!posed skin of
my shoulder. 3uddenly I was anything but calm, I was nostalgic. I wanted to
go back in time and stop %imitri from falling in that cave. /one of this would
be happening and we would both be together at court guarding people and
being with each other.
-(lease,- I whispered.
3he gave me a long measured look before reaching into her brief case and
handing me a folder of papers. -4ou owe me, &ose.-
Chapter D
-2issa,- I called softly, opening the door to the hotel with the folder under
my arm. It was the folder full of secrets, the one that could potentially
make or break 2issa in the ,oroi politics.
-3he's asleep,- Christian said, cradling her sleeping form against his chest.
'e was rubbing circles in her back, and she looked very rela!ed against him.
-0hat the hell are you doing, &ose$ 4ou can't +ust drag her out of Court and
drop a bombshell that big on her. 4ou could have given her some warning,
something to let her know what was coming.
-I was hoping to keep it from her,- I walked over and sat at the foot of the
bed, dropping the folder beside me. I hadn't looked at the file yet, I wanted
to wait until I was with 2issa, so she would know the whole truth from here
on out. -o protect her, after all the magic;-
-I worry about her too.- 'e looked down at her sleeping form, love shining in
his icy blue eyes. -5verything that's been happening isn't good for her and
I'm worried what will happen when,- 'e paused and glanced at me, -if you go
to trial. 0hat will happen if something goes wrong$-
-4ou mean if I die and she's left without her shadow<kissed guardian. If I
broke our bond allowing her to live in fear and paranoia, always surrounded
by blackness$-
-If she starts to go crazy;- Christian trailed off.
-0e're going to fi! that,- I said optimistically, but I didn't even sound sure
of myself. I was the leader, this was my crazy plan, but I wasn't even sure
of what was coming tomorrow. he only thing I was sure of was 2issa. 3he
needed to be protected and safe" I couldn't do that if I was dead. -3he
could always bond with someone else.-
he thought hurt me to the core. If 2issa bonded with another person she
would be okay, someone would always be there to suck away the darkness and
guide her through her darkest moments. hat would be the person to
brighten up her day, the person she always counted on to keep her safe. A
replacement &ose, someone that she would love +ust as much as she loved
me" and they would be one hundred percent dedicated to her. hey wouldn't
drag her across the world all the while risking her life. hey wouldn't leave
her to go on a hunting spree in 3iberia, or to track down their undead lover.
I then had a horrible thought, this person, some fictional, perfect person,
would be better for her then me. -I could be replaced.-
I didn't realize that I'd uttered the words out loud until I heard them
echoing around the room. -3he doesn't need me.-
-3he would never replace you, &ose.- Christian said his voice gentle. -4ou
cannot be replaced in 2issa's life. 3he needs you.-
I shook my head, realization setting in. -3he +ust needs someone to guard
her, to always protect her. 3he can replace me and be okay.-
-&ose<-
-I have to go.- I interrupted, feeling so small and tiny in the grand schemes
of things. If I died the world would keep spinning. 2ife wouldn't stop to
mourn the death of &ose 'athaway, the death of a traitor. 2issa would move
on, she would be happy again. 3he would start a family, probably with
Christian, and fill the world full of little %ragomir's. 3he didn't need me.
I walked to the room ne!t to mine, and paused before knocking on the door.
I felt like I was making a mistake, but it was something that I needed to
hear, and I needed to hear it immediately, and from %imitri. 'e opened the
door, and I could see a paperback book lying on the bed. -&ose,- he looked at
my face and raised an eyebrow. -Is something wrong$-
-4es. /o. ,aybe, look, can I +ust come in$-
'e opened the door further and let me into the room, locking the door
behind me. -Is 2issa okay$-
-3he will be,- I e!claimed, and I could tell I looked like a crazy woman. ,y
hair was wild, my eyes bright, and my voice on the verge of total e!citement.
-If I die, she'll be okay.-
-4ou're not dying.- 'is voice was cold as ice, but I ignored him.
-3he can bond with someone else. 3he's young" it won't faze her too much
losing me. 3he brought a raven back to life" I think I told you about that.
It's bonded to her too" she can bond with another person after I die" a
person that will keep her safe.-
-&ose,- %imitri reached out and grabbed my shoulders, his fingers digging
deep. -4ou are not going to die.-
-I heard you the first time, but I could.-
-4ou won't.- I could smell his into!icating scent while he was standing so
close to me.
-4ou don't know that.- ,y voice was flat and emotionless, as if talking about
my own death didn't bother me. 8ut, it did. It shocked every nerve, every
cell in my body. I could cease to e!ist at any moment and it was a scary
thought. -I need you to promise me something.-
-0hat$- %imitri asked warily. he last time I asked him to do something for
me it involved illegal activities with a wanted fugitive and discarding of any
guardians that got in our way, I didn't play when it came to favors.
-0hen I die<-
-4ou won't die.- 'is voice sounded panicked, almost like he thought he was
already losing me.
-If I die<- I amended.
-4ou. 0ill. /ot. %ie.- 'e was using his instructor tone, his voice all business
and no emotion. -4ou can't die.-
-3hut up,- I snapped, -and listen. 0hen I die, if I die, I need you to do
something for me" bond with 2issa. %on't let her go without a shadow<kissed
guardian.-
I knew how crazy I must have looked to him, blabbering about my death and
asking him to die so 2issa could bring him back shadowed<kissed. -his isn't
for me, it's for 2issa.- I added. 'e might not have done it +ust for me, but
he would do anything in his power to protect her and keep her safe. I had
heard that so many damn times since he came back, saw the devotion in his
eyes and heard it in his voice. 'e might have been able to deny me but he
wouldn't deny her, not since she was his savior.
I was feeling a hurricane of emotions, all hitting me at the same time. 5nvy.
3ad. 5mpowered. 'elpless. 9rightened. 2oneliness. /ostalgic. #n and on they
hit, battering me and tearing me up on the inside" breaking me, piece by
piece. I was losing control over the blackness from the magic. 0hen they put
me in +ail they took all my charms, so I didn't have anything to drain it out of
me. It was stuck, bouncing around on the inside ready to e!plode.
-%o you know what you're asking of me$- %imitri asked confusion on his face.
-o die,- I said simply, I didn't see why it was a big deal, I had done it
before;I was about to do it again. -hen to let 2issa help you live again.-
-I would see ghost.- 'e cringed at the side affect, something that I was
living with but so easily forgot.
-4ou can block them" I'll teach you everything before I die.- I said the
words so fast and calm that it shocked even me. #n the inside I was an
emotional storm, but on the outside I was a faEade of calm.
-4ou are not going to die.- 'e pleaded his voice full of emotion this time. 'e
let go of my shoulders and turned his back to me. 0e stood there in silence
for a moment and when he turned back around his face was blank once again.
-(romise me.- I whispered, hoping he would say yes. I didn't know who else I
could ask to be there. 5ddie was the only other person I trusted to take
care of her, but he was living a life of his own. I didn't want to interfere
anymore than I already had, but I would if that was what it took.
hat's when the blackness really took over. I felt it tugging at my corners,
battering against my insides, fighting to get out. I gave into it, the final
piece of myself falling off. I walked up to %imitri and flung my hand against
his chest, furious. -4ou have to do this for 2issa. I don't give a shit about
myself right now, and you should forget I'm one asking you. 4ou have to do
this. 3o what$ 4ou'll live with ghost. 8ig deal, you'll get over it. 4ou'll feel
everything she feels and be able to protect her better. 4ou will be the one
that gets to watch her love life unfold and be envious because you can't be
with the person you want. It doesn't matter. hey come first. At least you'll
be alive. I'll be dead. (rotect her from herself.-
-I won't do it.- 'e said, eyeing me. -4ou really need to calm down &ose.-
-0hat do you mean you won't do it$- I snapped, anger seeping out of me. I
+abbed my finger into his chest, hard. -Are you that selfish that you can't
do anything for anyone else$ 0hat else do I have to say to get you to
understand$ 3he'll go crazy if she doesn't have anyone there to suck the
darkness out of her, it will stay with her, killing her slowly. 3he needs you.-
%imitri shook his head, grabbing my finger and pulling it away. -3he needs
you.-
I gave a harsh laugh.
-&ose, calm down, let's talk about this. 4ou aren't acting like yourself.-
At that moment I wanted to do anything but talk about this anymore. I
lunged at him, and at first I think he thought I was attacking him, until my
lips reached his. I kissed him with the passion and desire I had been feeling
since he came home. 'is arms snaked around my waist and pulled me closer
to him. he kiss was hungry and deep, and in that moment I was carefree.
,y emotions were still bouncing all over the place, but at least I could feel
his lips moving against mine. 9ocus on something other than the storm raging
inside of me.
9or a moment I forgot everything. Adrian. he *ueen's death and me being
blamed for her murder. he fight that was sure to ensue between 2issa and
me when she found out the reason I escaped court. I forgot about 3trigoi
lurking in corners and )ictor out in the world again.
he world seemed to stop spinning to celebrate this occasion. 5verything
seemed strangely *uiet and clear. 3lowly my emotions started to settle, and
the kiss deepened. #ne by one my emotions returned to normal, +ust a *uiet
worry at the back of my mind.
%imitri led us to the bed and loomed over me. Bissing my neck and traveling
down to my e!posed collar bone, scattering a bunch of kisses there. hey
traveled back up to my lips, so firm and unwavering, until he pulled back. -0e
can't,- he breathed, and I could tell how much those words hurt him.
Bnowing that they hurt him I felt some kind of sick satisfaction. It meant
that he wanted me too, as much as I wanted him.
I nodded. -0e can.-
I e!pected him to argue that he wasn't ready, that he couldn't be this close
to me so soon, but I was shocked. -Adrian.-
hat was all he said, all the e!planation he thought I needed to change my
mind, but it wasn't. #ne emotion that hadn't faded while we kissed was
desire" it seemed to grow stronger still, every second. I wanted his hands to
touch every inch of my skin, his kisses to burn every e!posed part of me. I
wanted him.
-I don't care,- I insisted. It was a lie, but I didn't want to dwell on how I
was breaking Adrian's heart into a million pieces. I loved Adrian, but
sometimes loving people +ust wasn't enough. I loved two people and their love
alone wasn't going to make my decision any easier. 'e would find someone
that loved him the way he needed, someone that was devoted only to him. I
+ust wasn't that person.
'e kissed me again, but it was shorter this time. It was still full of intense
heat and passion, don't get me wrong, and I was grateful for everything he
was willing to give me. ,y heart was singing, leaping in my chest. 'e's kissing
me. 'e's kissing me. 'e's kissing me.
,y heart kept singing the same song and my hands traveled up %imitri shirt,
past his toned abs to rest over his heart. It was beating hard and heavy, so
warm against my hands, so alive. I could almost imagine that his heart was
singing a song that only mine could understand. hat's what love was. It
didn't feel real, like I could wake up at any moment and realize that this was
all a dream. Alas a perfect dream, but false nonetheless. 0e were
intertwined in a dream surrounded by raging storms and nightmares. 2ife was
scary, but love was too, at times.
It ended too soon, his lips pulled away from mine and I reached up again,
putting my arms around his neck and pulling him back down to me. -I can't,
&oza.- 'is breathing was heavy, the words forced from his mouth. -I care.-
I didn't want to leave right now. I didn't want the emotions to come back. I
didn't want to leave his eager and accepting arms. -'old me, then.- I
whispered, strangely that was enough for me" him +ust holding me.
'e obeyed silently, snuggling behind me and wrapping his arms around my
waist, pulling me closer than I already was. -4ou lost control earlier, didn't
you$-
-I always lose control when I'm around you, Comrade,- I teased, a goofy grin
spreading across my face.
-hat's not what I mean;with all the magic 2issa has been using, it's
affecting you isn't it$ 4ou lost control,- I tensed and he s*ueezed me, -and
it's okay, &oza, I'm here.-
-8ut you haven't always been.-
-I will be now.- 'is voice left no doubt in my mind, but I didn't feel like I
could completely trust him again. I thought at any moment he could go back
into his shell, not touching and not kissing, leaving me all alone to deal with
everything and that was what scared me the most" having to deal with
everything by myself.
I turned around to face him, my arms now resting around his neck. -I need
you to promise me.-
-I can't.-
-0hy$- I asked, trying to keep my voice gentle when I was starting to grow
frantic again.
-8ecause, I don't want to think about losing you. I don't want to think about
my life continuing and my heart beating when you will be gone. I don't want
to lose you, and I simply cannot think about it. I would rather die myself, the
right way this time, then go on living without you.-
-I wouldn't want to live without you either" hell I couldn't live without you.
5ven when you were gone you were always around. 5specially in my memories,
I spent a lot of time in my head after you were gone, thinking about the old
you, but I need you to do this. I need you to live for me.- ,y voice was
pleading, my eyes begging, and I hoped it was enough to convince him.
'is fingers played with my long, brown hair as he gazed into my eyes. 0e
were silent for several moments, +ust feeling each other's heart thumping in
their chest. -#kay,- he whispered, pain in his eyes and voice.
-#kay$-
'e nodded. -#kay, I promise.-
0e were in comfortable silence for a few moments, one that he broke.
-0hat's going to happen now$-
-0e find 2issa's sibling and go home.- he words sent a shiver down my
spine, 'home' no longer applied a safe haven and a good place to sleep, it was
the place I was going to die.
-0hat happens if we do go home$- 'e asked. 'e knew the answer to the
*uestion" he +ust wanted to hear it out loud. ,aybe that would make it more
real for him, leave no doubt in his mind that my death was coming, and soon.
-I die.- It was so final, the end of my tragic eighteen years to come in one
day.
-hen let's not go home.-
-0here would we go$- I whispered. I wasn't really considering running away,
that was out of the *uestion, I was +ust curious as to what was running
through his mind.
-3iberia, we could live with my family.- 0e can live with his family. 'e
wouldn't leave me. hat life sounded perfect, surrounded by his family and
my friends. I would be alive and happy with the love of my life, but that
wasn't fair to anyone. /ot to Christian, 2issa and ,ia who wouldn't have a
choice. If they went back I would have to go back, and I couldn't let them
take the blame for something I did. I wouldn't allow it. It wasn't fair to
Adrian either" he needed to know the truth.
-I wish we could,- I whispered, and it was the truth, -but you know we
can't.-
-I wish you could see them again.-
-,e too,- tears were starting to come to my eyes, my throat constricting.
he rest of the day I spent in his arms, +ust looking at his face. 3ometimes
I would kiss him, and he would kiss me back, but he always pulled back. 0e
didn't talk much" we +ust lay there, tangled in each other, until 2issa woke
up.
3he was furious. 3he wanted to see me, she wanted to know what was going
on with her father and she wanted to know now. Come here. 3he demanded
through the bond and it was all I could do not to roll my eyes.
-2issa's awake,- I said, breaking the last of our silences, -she wants me.-
'e nodded and let go of me. As soon as his arms left me I missed them, like
some part of me was being removed. -6o,- he said, -I'll still be here
tomorrow.-
-I'm coming back tonight.- I promised, and he laughed.
-6o to 2issa.-
I nodded, then I left the room.
Chapter F
-2issa,- I called softly as I opened the door to our room. I saw her sitting on
the corner of the bed, her hands clasped together in her lap. -0here's
Christian$-
-'e's practicing with ,ia,- 2issa said, looking over my head. 3he looked over
at the door, the walls and down to the floor, but never once would she look
at me. -0e need to talk.-
he folder was in my hands and I noticed how it trembled when I held it out
for 2issa to take. -his is it, the folder I asked 3ydney for. 3he gave it to
me, but she wasn't too happy about it.-
2issa snatched the folder and opened it, skimming each page with careful
eyes. -his doesn't make any sense, it's +ust information. 0hy would anyone
take it, and what do we want with it$ I could have told you all the stuff in
this file.-
I figured I might as well show her the note atiana wrote to me before she
was murdered. I knew she would be furious, especially at me for keeping the
secret from her, but she needed to know. -2issa, there's more.- I reached
into my pocket, my fingers securing around the little note, and pulled it out.
I handed it to 2issa and cringed when my hand touched hers.
-0hat's this$- 3he asked, turning the note over in her hand, trying to find
who it was for and who wrote it. 9inally, she opened it slowly and read each
word. I watched her read it once, then again and again. hrough the bond I
felt all of her emotions. 3hock. Anger. 3ad. 8etrayed. %enial.
9inally, she looked at me, her eyes burning with anger. -his isn't true. It
can't be.-
I nodded. -I think it is, and that's what we're doing here. his is the reason
we ran away from Court.- ,y voice was gentle and kind, I didn't want to
overwhelm her.
-,y father would never cheat on my mother, he loved her too much: 4ou
knew them: Anyone could see that my father simply adored my mother, and
he would never hurt her.- 3he was growing angry, her voice rising with each
word.
-I didn't want to believe it either,- I admitted.
-It's not that I don't want to believe it, &ose. I +ust don't believe it. It's
not true, atiana is a lying bitch.- 3he didn't believe that, not really. 3he
didn't admire atiana but she used to trust her. his note from her
confused 2issa, she had so many conflicting emotions raging inside of her.
3he wanted to believe atiana was a great Gueen and that she would always
help 2issa, that she was doing this beyond her grave to give her an advantage
in the ,oroi politics. 8ut, then there was her father. 'e was charming and
handsome, much like her brother, and she loved him so much, missed him
every day. 3he didn't want to believe that her father was capable of doing
something so hurtful.
-2issa I know how mad you are<-
-#f course you do,- she snapped, interrupting me, -you are bonded to me. I
brought you back to life after the crash that killed my parents and I've
never once regretted it, but my parents are dead. 0e should +ust let my
father's secrets die with him.-
I shook my head, shocked by her words. 9or a moment I was speechless, did
she really look at it that way$ 9inally I said the first words that came to my
mind. -/o, we can't. 4ou need this 2issa.-
I walked over to where she was sitting and sat down beside her. I put my
arms around her shoulders and hugged her to me, and I smoothed her hair.
3ilent tears where streaming down her face, they were caused by anger and
sadness, and I wished I could do something to make her feel better. I could
only take away the darkness, not every bad emotion, but I wished I could
take them away. I would happily have those emotions trapped in me if it
meant 2issa would never hurt again.
-I don't want it,- she said softly, -if it means ruining my father's reputation
+ust so I can vote, I don't want to do it.- 3he didn't mean it, I could tell.
3he was willingly to go and find the other member of her family" she wanted
to know them, to love them. 3till she was too upset with her father to be
happy knowing she wasn't all alone anymore.
-0e're going.-
-4ou can't force me. I want to go back to Court, now.-
-I can't go back until I find your sibling. 0hen I go back 2issa they are going
to kill me, and I'm doing this last thing for you. It's my turn, again.- 3he
pulled away from me and looked at my face.
-'ow can you say that$ 4ou won't die, I won't let it happen.- 3he was
frantic, imagining her life without me. 3he imagined spending the rest of her
life drowning in a sea of darkness, always in over her head without her best
friend to protect her. 3he would resort back to cutting herself, and no
amount of happiness could ever amount to the sadness enclosing her.
-4ou don't have a vote, unless we find your sibling,- I pointed out, feeling
triumph, she knew I was right.
-Can't you +ust leave it alone$- 3he yelled, standing up and pacing around the
room. -I don't want to find this person: I don't want to see what my father
did behind my mother's back:-
-2issa,- I snapped, feeling bad as I watched her cringe from my tone. -I
don't care what you want to do. 0hat I say goes, and I say that we're going
to find your sibling. 4ou can run back to Court if you want to, but that
doesn't mean the problem +ust goes away. I'm still going to find them.-
-(lease don't,- she sobbed, her voice catching at the end. -I can't do this,
I'm not strong enough.-
I walked up to her and hugged her again, this time she clung to me, like she
was leaning on me for support, and I guess she was. hat's what best friends
were for, and she needed me. I didn't want to die, and I was going to do
everything in my power to stay alive. he truth is, I need 2issa +ust as much
as she needs me. 3he's like a sister to me, and I love her. -It's okay,- I
murmured, -I'm strong enough, and I'll help you be strong too.-
-'ow could you keep this from me$- here it was the *uestion I knew she
would ask.
-It's my +ob to protect you.-
-'ow is this protecting me$ 4ou were going to have to tell me sometime,- she
was angry. he more she thought about me lying to her, the worse it got.
-I was protecting you from yourself 2issa. his isn't your fault.- 2issa had a
way of making everything seem like her fault. 'er father cheated, and she
thought there was something she could have done to stop it. 3omething that
would have made her father love only his wife and children. I lied to protect
her, and she thought that was her fault too. ,aybe if she were stronger I
would trust her with more secrets, instead of hiding them in the shadows
and keeping her in the dark.
-his isn't your fault, 2issa.- I repeated, wanting a response from her.
-I know.- hat was a lie.
-4ou could at least act like you mean it,- I sighed, rubbing a big circle in her
back.
-I do,- she snapped, -It's his fault.- Another lie, she blamed herself the
most, then her mother, then Andre, she even blamed her sibling a little, even
though she didn't know them. 3he didn't want to lay the blame with her
father, where it was most deserved.
-It was his fault,- I agreed, -'e made a mistake. 'e cheated on your mom,
and that sucks, but it's in the past. &ight now, we have to focus on your
sibling. 0e have to find them and bring them back to Court. hen, we have
to keep me alive.- 3he felt oddly calm, and I was waiting for her to snap.
0ith everything that had been going on lately her emotions were all over the
place, but I e!pected a bigger reaction from her. ,ore of a bitch fest, I
guess, but she was +ust upset. -Are you okay$-
-/o.- At least she was being honest.
-%o you want to help me go through the file$-
3he shook her head but sat down with the file anyway. I went and sat ne!t
to her, looking through the papers. here were a lot of them, it was his
whole life spelled out on paper. I pulled out his bank statements, surprised
to see segments highlighted in yellow.
-2iss, look at this,- I showed her the paper, but her eyes drifted to the
comforter.
I looked at the bank statements for the following months, seeing a pattern.
hese were the latest documents, having taken place +ust a week before he
died. he highlighted parts showed that every month there was one
thousand dollars wired to a bank account in 2as )egas.
-2ook at this,- I shoved the paper in 2issa's face, and saw her eyes widened.
-It doesn't mean anything,- she insisted, -my father loved to gamble, he was
probably +ust paying off some gambling debts.-
-I doubt that,- I said, going farther back into the files. I saw the same thing
in all of those files, for si!teen years there was one thousand dollars wired
to the same bank account in 2as )egas. -3ee, 2issa.- I showed her the
papers, and felt bad as I watched her face drop.
-0hat's the name on the account$-
I looked back at the paper. -It doesn't have a name, +ust the account
number and that it's a local bank in )egas.-
-3o is that where we are going ne!t$-
I nodded and 2issa bit her lip. -I'm tired, &ose. Can we call it a night$- I
shot her a glare. It was +ust now sundown" the moon had +ust started
ascending in the sky. It was the beginning of our day, not to mention she +ust
woke up.
-Are you okay$-
-4eah,- she tried giving me a small smile, but it looked more like a grimace. -I
+ust need to think, to sleep on it, I guess.-
-#kay,- I got up" I was going to watch the sunset and hopefully with %imitri.
-&ose$-
-4eah,- I put the folder on the table beside the door, and turned around to
look at her.
-Can you go and get Christian for me$-
I nodded, feeling a flare of +ealousy. 3he wanted Christian to comfort her
but not me$ I was her best friend, her 6uardian. It was my +ob to be there
for her. I stalked out of the room, slamming the door behind me. I stalked
down to the grassy area where ,ia and Christian were busy throwing clumsy
punches, at least Christian was. ,ia's punches were graceful and skilled, like
she had been practicing for years rather than months.
-4o, fire boy, 2issa wants<- I didn't get to finish my sentence, I was sucked
into 2issa's head, her emotions taking me by surprise.
It had been a long time since any emotion 2issa felt was so strong that I was
involuntary sucked into her head, living out whatever she was doing. It was
something that we both hated about the bond, even though it proved useful
sometimes. 2ike when she was getting kidnapped or I wanted to escape the
boredom of my +ail cell and it might +ust prove useful now.
3he was blind with rage, stumbling around the room. 9irst she locked the
door, she didn't want anyone walking in on her doing what she was about to
do. hen she stumbled over to the sink, which was outside the bathroom in
our room. 3he searched the drawers, trying to find a razor blade. 3he
couldn't find one so she went over to the little night stand between the two
beds, and found what she was looking for. 3cissors laying on top of the 8ible
every room had. 3he +erked them out, hesitating above her wrist.
3he had kept her emotions in line for me, because she didn't want me to
comfort her. 3he didn't even want me to see her like this. 5verything was
her fault. 'er father cheated and that was her fault. I was going to die, and
that was her fault too. 3he had a brother or a sister, and that was her fault.
3he didn't know how to deal with thinking these things so she was doing the
one thing she knew would take the pain away.
I *uickly pulled out of her head, and started running up the stairs to our
room. I pounded on the door, and %imitri opened the door to his room and
stepped out in the humid summer air. 'e shot me a look but I ignored him,
still pounding on the door.
-6o away:- I heard 2issa yell from the inside. ,y pounding had made her drop
the scissors and she was searching for them under the bed.
-2issa open the fucking door:- I pulled on the door, cursing the lock on the
inside.
-2issa, open up,- Christian shouted from beside me. I hadn't even realized
that he and ,ia had followed me up the stairs.
0e could hear her sobbing from the inside, and I felt the +oy she felt as her
hand closed around the handle of the scissors. I started kicking at the door,
happy that this motel was so cheap. he locks on the inside were flimsy at
best, and no match for my half vampire strength. After the second kick the
lock let up and I stumbled into the room, and walked right up to 2issa.
-I'm sorry,- she whispered, tears streaming down her face. 0e had made it
+ust in time, she didn't cut herself and I was so grateful. 'ow come I didn't
see through her act$ If I wasn't so worried about the folder and her
trusting Christian more than me, maybe none of this would have happened.
3he handed the scissors to me, which I instantly placed in %imitri's hand.
hey had all followed me into the room and were clustered in a small semi<
circle around us. -3hhhh,- I patted her back, hugging her closer to me.
his is what I was afraid of. he darkness in her all the time and her having
to resort to cutting herself to deal with it. 3he was using too much spirit
and it was driving her crazy again. hat scared the hell out of me, because I
thought I was doing everything I could to protect her from. 3ince we left
Court I hadn't been doing a very good +ob, I realized. he only darkness I
took was earlier today, which led to the scene in %imitri's room. #n top of
everything she hadn't fed in two days and she was feeling fragile.
-2issa,- I handed her to Christian, who instantly put both arms around her
waist. 3he snuggled against his neck, her arms around his waist too. -I need
you to make me another charm fused with 3pirit.-
3he nodded but made no move to start the charm. %imitri, ,ia and I left
Christian to comfort 2issa. 0e started walking around outside, I was leading
them around the darkest corners of our cheap little place, and they followed
without *uestion.
-3o,- ,ia asked, trying to be nonchalant, -does she do this a lot$-
-/o. /ot anymore.-
-3he used to do it a lot, right$ I mean, I remember at school that I found
out she cut herself, but I didn't think it was anything ma+or.-
-3he used to do it a lot before, especially when she was really upset. I mean,
it wasn't for fun or anything and she's not one of those emo freaks, but it
used to be the only way she knew how to deal with everything.-
-0hat did she find out today$- ,ia asked. 3he was half curious and half
afraid of what it could mean.
I handed her the note that I had +ust let 2issa read, and watched as she
read it twice. -0ow. hat sucks.-
-ell me about it.-
-0here are we going$- %imitri asked, pulling a piece of stray hair back
behind his ear.
I walked out into the parking lot, finally finding what I was looking for.
here was a drunk man stumbling around his car, tripping on rocks and
cracks. 'e was really wasted, and I think that was the norm for him. 'e
reached for his keys and started to get in his car, which was really +ust a
beat up pile of shit. -4ou about to drink and drive$- I shouted, catching him
off guard.
-I<I'm n<not drink<drinking,- he slurred, his breath reeked of cheap li*uor.
-I hear that's how you humans die.- I wasn't trying to say that vampires
were perfect or anything, but most of the time the ,oroi would drink and
their guardians would drive them home. 0e also handled our alcohol a lot
better.
he man got out of his car and came to stand in front of me. 'e looked me
over, stopping to ogle at my chest, and finally spoke again. -0ell, aren't you
a f<fine piece of a<as<ass,- he gave a harsh laugh, and put his fingers behind
my belt loop, pulling me closer.
-%on't touch her,- %imitri growled, stepping between me and the man. -&ose,
what are you doing$-
he man looked from me to %imitri. -his you're old m<man$- 'e looked at
,ia, checking her out like he did me. -I guess you'll have to do, y<you are f<
fine as hell too.-
-0e aren't here to give your drunk ass a booty call,- I laughed as he
stumbled backwards. 'e was seriously about to pass out. -'ow about you
come up to our room and give my friend some blood, you see she's into that
kind of thing.-
'is glazed eyes widened, and he nodded e!citedly. -3h<she's a f<freak:-
-I bet you like that,- I muttered and %imitri laughed.
0e took him up to our room. -2issa, I have a present for you.-
-3he<she's banging:- he man said e!citedly.
-3hut up,- I threw the man down on the chair. -I would let you fed from me,
but I need all my strength in case I need to fight.-
3he nodded.
-%imitri and I will go outside,- I said, -we'll give you guys some privacy.-
0e walked down to the grass where ,ia and Christian had +ust finished
practicing. -hat was very nice, what you did.- %imitri commented. 'e was
lying on the ground, propped up by his elbows. I laid down beside him,
watching as the first stars appeared in the night sky. I could smell the
flowers from the garden beside us, sweet and fragrant in the still night.
-hey needed to feed,- I said, playing with the grass surrounding me.
-It was still very nice,- his fingers were pulling up grass too, occasionally
bumping into mine.
-hanks.- 0e sat there in silence, watching the stars appear one by one.
I know it's silly, and that it wouldn't really matter, but I made a wish on the
first star I saw. I wished that everything would go back to being semi<
normal after this. hat %imitri and I could be together, guarding 2issa or
someone else at Court. I wished I could stay alive and happy.
-%imitri, do you believe in fate$-
-I'm not sure,- he turned his head to look at me, hair falling into his face. I
reached out and tucked it behind his ears, happy when it obeyed instead of
falling back into place. -0hy$-
-8ecause I do,- my voice was soft, -I think the night you came to get us it
was fate, like we were destined to be together ever since that night.-
-I think that too,- he was about to say something else, but then we heard a
twig snap. I heard footsteps approaching fast and skilled, light on their feet
and graceful.
hey were 6uardians, and they were surrounding us.
%imitri and I instantly sprung to action, standing up back to back, rotating in
a circle. I could hear them getting closer to us, and I could make out shapes
against the blackness. here were maybe fifteen of them in all, more than
the Gueen had ever traveled with, and maybe if they focused on protecting
her like this she would still be alive, and I wouldn't be going through hell.
%imitri and I were badass, but I knew we couldn't take all fifteen of the
6uardians down by ourselves, so I called the one person I knew would be able
to help. -,ia:-
3he ran out of the room, looking more refreshed after having fed. 'er eyes
scanned the darkness, seeing what we were seeing. 3he closed the door
behind her and started running down the stairs. 3he was able to run over to
us, +oining our rotating back<to<back circle. -3hit,- she muttered.
-9unny, that's +ust what I was thinking,- I muttered, and I braced myself
for a battle.
Chapter 1H
hey were on us in a moment, swarming around us like a bunch of angry bees,
searching for the best place to sting. 0e kept rotating in our circle, waiting
for them to make the first strike. /ot surprisingly, the 6uardian closest to
me tried to wrap her hand around my wrist, but ,ia kicked it away. he
6uardian gave her a stunned look and lunged at her, and that set everyone
fighting.
I had a tall, muscular 6uardian lunge at me, and I recognized him to be
'erald, one of the main 6uardians that guarded my cell. 'is face was cold
and angry. -4ou're not going anywhere this time, bitch.- 'e spat, spraying me
with spit. -4ou think you're smart enough to escape your death$ 4ou're
fucking crazy. 4ou have another thing coming to you.-
'is words terrified me, because at the moment I wasn't sure we were going
to be able to take them, to get away. I, of course, was horrified by the
thought of my death, especially at their hand. I wouldn't admit that to him,
not in a million years. -I wouldn't be so sure about that,- I hissed. 0hile
he'd been talking to me, he left his right side unprotected and he said I was
fucking crazy$ I kicked him, hard enough to send him tumbling into the man
behind him. 'e straightened himself up, starting to advance on me again.
I looked around, trying to find something that would help me in battle, when
I finally spotted it. 0e were in front of the garden, and there was a little
tool shed sitting to the side. A tool shed that I was sure to be filled with
sharp gardening tools. It wouldn't kill them, I didn't want that, but it would
be enough to in+ure them. I started running, 'erald right on my heels. 0hen
I finally made it, 'eralds hands tugged at my hair, yanking me backwards. I
grabbed a potted plant and smashed it against the side of his head. 8roken
bits of clay were shattering around us, soil and flowers were showering
down. 'erald took his hand away from my hair and pulled it up to his head,
and started to stumble. -3orry 'erald,- I muttered, picking up another
potted plant and smashing it against the back of his head. 'e fell to the
ground, and I looked around, seeing he wasn't the only one.
,ia had taken down two of her guardians, still struggling with one as %imitri
fought with three of his own, one unconscious on the ground by his feet.
here were four left downstairs and I saw three of others climbing the
stairs, probably looking for 2issa and Christian. he four that were left all
started to advance on me, closing in around me, leaving me trapped. I
reached for the shovel, swinging it around me, knocking one of them down. I
brought the shovel down hard against the top of his head, and he didn't
move again. I swung my shovel into the stomach of a female 6uardian, and
she doubled over, wheezing. 'er head was close to my feet, so I kicked her
temple, thanking my lucky stars that it knocked her out.
I saw the 6uardians upstairs, looking into open windows, trying to find the
%ragomir (rincess. hey were still several doors away from where we were
staying. hrough the bond I could feel 2issa's shock and worry. 3he was
watching through one of the blinds, getting a very limited view of what was
happening. he drunk man was passed out in the chair, and Christian was
getting ready to make an escape, or come and help fight if things got too
bad. ,ia had gotten rid of the last 6uardian and was helping %imitri with his
three. I only had two left, then we had to take care of the three upstairs.
(eople were starting to gather around, watching us fight. A couple of them
were shouting for me and ,ia to kick their ass, while others wanted the
'nin+as' to win.
-9orget them,- I heard one 6uardian grunt, -get the girl and hurry:-
I watched in horrible disbelief as the remaining 6uardians started to
advance on me, adding on to my two. he three upstairs stopped looking for
2issa, and came to +oin the five surrounding me. #f course, that didn't stop
,ia and %imitri from fighting their way through them, coming to stand by
me. ,ia grabbed a pair of garden sheers from the shed and a shovel,
grasping one in each of her hands, and %imitri started to throw potted
plants at the 6uardians. It caused a couple of them to stumble, and ,ia hit
them against the side of the head. I seriously hoped she knew the
difference between killing someone and knocking them unconscious, and from
the look of her blows she was doing a good +ob.
,ia stopped swinging her shovel, dropping it to the ground, still clutching the
garden sheers in her other hand. 3he looked at %imitri and me. -I have a
plan, follow my lead.- 3he grabbed onto a fence and we copied her movement.
0hen we had each grabbed onto the gate surrounding the pool the 6uardians
started running towards us. /othing happened for a moment, and then when
they were an arm length away, water started to form a protective wall
around us. he 6uardians stopped moving for a moment, then tried reaching
for us through the water. hen, water started rising from the swimming
pool, gathering above us. It towered over us, and then dropped fast.
3uddenly, water was surrounding us from all sides, trying to break our hold
on the fence. ,ia was causing waves around the 6uardians, making them fall
flat on their backs. It swept the 6uardians into its watery embrace, and
dragged them back into the pool.
-I hope they know how to swim,- ,ia said between deep, heavy breaths. 0e
were soaking wet and the crowd started clapping. he manager was making
her way down by the pool and we *uickly went up the stairs. Christian and
2issa met us outside, the folder clasped tightly in her grasp.
-2et's go,- %imitri said, throwing his duster around his shoulder. 'e had
*uickly gone into his room, gathering all of his things. he 6uardians were
starting to get out of the water, helping each other out and coughing crazily.
-%on't you get hot$- I asked.
'e arched an eyebrow.
-I mean with the duster on all the time$-
'e shrugged. -3ure.-
-hen why do you wear it$-
-8ecause you never know when you're going to need it.- As he said this, he
draped the duster over my head, covering my hair and body. 2issa handed me
a pair of sunglasses. Christian, 2issa and ,ia were wearing hats and
sunglasses, trying to disguise themselves easily. I thought we probably
looked like a bunch of shady drug dealers, but that seemed to be the norm
for the people here.
-here are more 6uardians here,- %imitri said. -Beep your heads down and
*uickly get to the car.-
0e walked silently and *uickly to the car, a big black 3@) we rented from
the airport. It was parked as close to the room as we could get and we
*uickly piled into the car. -here they are:- 3omeone shouted, and suddenly
6uardians were swarming the car. %imitri locked the doors and cranked the
car, shifting it into reverse.
-0hat are you going to do$- I hissed, shrinking against my seat. I had
stupidly climbed into the front seat, allowing 2issa, Christian and ,ia to take
the back. -&un over them$-
-#f course not,- he said, -they'll move.-
-&ose<- 2issa started. 'er feelings through the bond shocked.
-'e won't run them over,- I said, cringing as %imitri started to back the car
up. 'e was right. hey started to back up as well. #ne 6uardian was climbing
the windshield and hanging on to the top of the car. -3hit.-
%imitri put the car into drive and floored the gas, sending us shooting out of
the parking lot. he 6uardian was still hanging on to the car, right in front of
%imitri, and %imitri was swerving in the road. -Can you see$- I hoped he was
driving like that to try and lose the 6uardian but I wasn't sure.
-/ot really.- 'e muttered as he ran off the side of the road, the car
bouncing over rocks and tree roots.
-&ose<- ,ia said.
-'ang on,- I interrupted again.
%imitri +erked the car back onto the road, then started crossing into the
yellow line. I yanked the steering wheel back over, allowing us to stay on the
right side of the road. It would be horrible to die in a car crash after coming
all this way. As the car started gaining speed the 6uardian flew off, finally,
and landed on the side of the road. -0e need to head back to the airport
and fast. hey're probably piling into their cars so they can follow us.-
-&ose,- Christian said, -you really need to see this.-
-0hat$- I snapped, turning around at last.
3itting there in the backseat between ,ia and 2issa was my father. 'e was
wearing a grey and gold fedora and grey suit, with a matching gold tie. 'e
didn't have his 6uardians with him. 'e smirked at me, and I couldn't help
but smirk back.
-0hat the hell are you doing here$- I asked. %imitri looked into the review
mirror, seeing who I was talking about, and he gripped the steering wheel
tighter, turning his knuckles white.
-hat's a *uestion for me to ask you, &ose.- ,y father said, looking around
the car. -hat's a *uestion I should ask all of you.- 'is gaze stopped on
%imitri and flicked back to me. -4our mother is furious not to mention poor
Adrian. 'alf the 6uardians in the world are looking for you.-
I shrugged. -I'm going back, as soon as I finish what I'm doing.- At the
mention of Adrian my heart shattered a little, but I didn't allow myself to
think about my heart or Adrian's. I didn't have time right now. /ot with
everything else going on.
,y father's eyes narrowed. -o the world it looks like you're trying to
escape prosecution.-
-I'm not,- I said *uickly, although I was starting to wonder if I was doing all
of this to delay my death. It was a good plan in theory, until I either got
captured or turned myself in, resulting in my death all the same.
-hen what are you doing$-
I looked at 2issa and she gave me a tiny nod. I took a deep breath and
started to e!plain everything to Abe. 3tarting with the note Ambrose gave
me that day in court and ending at the fight that had +ust happened. -'ow
did you get here, anyway$-
'e smiled at me. -I was called away on business when the 6uardians got a
phone call telling them of your location. It was 3ydney, on my command, so
don't blame her. In her defense she didn't want to call at all, it wasn't until
I threatened to send her back to &ussia that she finally caved. o everyone
I'm in &ussia with my 6uardians, on official business. I even had someone
check in under my name at a hotel. I have an alibi so no one suspects me of
anything.-
-0hy would they$- I asked, my eyebrows rising. -4ou haven't done anything.
4ou're +ust sitting in our car after you had fifteen 6uardians sent to
capture us.-
-#h &ose, I'm here to help you.-
-'ow could you help me$-
-8y giving you and your friends,- he sneered the last word, his gaze focused
on %imitri, -a place to stay. A safe place to stay at, where the 6uardians
can't find you.-
'e e!plained how he had houses throughout the country under different
names, bought from the humans and surrounded by human houses. 'e said it
was a great place to go while he was on 'business', and I still didn't know
what his 'business' was. 'e said they were large and well protected by
6uardians but not the ones we were running from. 'is private 6uardians that
he paid, he assured us that they were trustworthy and use to these kind of
things. 'e had feeders for ,ia, 2issa and Christian so they could feed
everyday while we were there.
-0hat do you think$- 'e asked brightly. 'e wanted to help so badly, and he
was my father. I knew I should let him, he always had my best interest at
heart, but it seemed too easy.
-0hat's in it for you$-
-0hat do you mean$- 'is sunny disposition faltered and I saw concern
buried deep on his face. -Can't a father help his daughter$-
I looked around the car at my friends. hey had been with me so far and
they would be with me no matter what I chose. -0hat do you guys think$-
-I think it's great,- ,ia said.
-I do too, &ose, it sounds;safe.- 2issa agreed, nodding her head.
-I agree with them, &ose, sorry.- Christian said, looking out the window.
I looked at %imitri. 0hat he had to say meant more to me than what anyone
else had to say, it was his approval I was waiting for.
-%imitri$- I asked hesitantly, my eyes going to him. 'e turned his head and
met my gaze, holding it with his brown hues.
-I think it's a good idea.-
Abe was beaming at all of the approval. 'e gave me a blinding smile and I
gave a small smile in return. I nodded at him, giving him my approval as well.
-3o it's settled then$ 0e fly to 2as )egas and you stay with me while you're
trying to find 2issa sibling$ hen you return back to court and plead your
innocence$-
I nodded, not knowing how true his last words were.
0e finally made it to the airport, buying tickets with a credit card Abe had
in a different name. 'e said he bought it in the human world" apparently you
could get that kind of stuff almost anywhere, along with fake papers to get
out of the country, which could come in handy if our search led us out of the
country.
0e turned in the car and the man wanted to know what the hell happened.
here were scratches on the side of the car from %imitri running off the
road, and muddy footprints on the hood. 0e paid him an e!tra five hundred
dollars, +ust to get him to shut up.
9inally, we were able to board the plane after waiting two hours at the
airport, still in our disguises, still looking like shady drug dealers. After more
waiting the plane finally lifted off, taking us to )egas.
0e were one step closer to find 2issa's sibling, one step closer to giving
2issa her fair chance at voting. 0e were one step closer to changing the
world as we knew it, and we were also one step closer to my death.
Chapter 11
I wasn't dreaming of anything. he blackness was an easy welcome from the
hell I had been through the last couple of days, and I very much en+oyed the
dreamless sleep I was having. hat is until it wasn't a dreamless sleep
anymore.
he blackness took on the shape of the court, taking me into a small private
garden. I was sitting on a small wooden bench, wearing my nazar around my
neck and the dress I went to meet Adrian's parents in. I knew at once the
dream was a product of dream walking, and I prayed that it was 2issa who
had penetrated her charm and not Adrian, because I didn't think I could
bear another visit from him. his was a hopeless wish because 2issa didn't
know how to dream walk and I knew that she had fallen fast asleep as soon
as we went to our rooms, a *uick check of the bond before I had fallen
asleep told me as much.
Adrian materialized beside me, a cigarette in his hand. I had to admit, he
didn't look good, it was probably the worse I had ever seen him look. 'e had
dark circles under his eyes, as if he hadn't been sleeping well, and smelt
strongly of li*uor. 'e turned to look at me and I noticed with a pang of guilt
that his normally lively eyes were void of any emotion, and I couldn't help
but think that I was the cause for everything I saw before me.
I narrowed my eyes at his cigarette but he didn't seem to notice, or maybe
he noticed but didn't care. -4ou were doing so good,- I snapped, -not
smoking. /ow you're +ust puffing away.-
'e glared at me, and took a long, dramatic puff. -0hat gives you the right to
say anything about my unhealthy habits$-
-0hat does that mean$-
-I figured you wouldn't care anymore, seeing as you don't care about me.-
'is face was emotionless but his voice carried the pain of his words, and I
felt my heart shatter.
-0hy would you say something like that$- I whispered, my hand reaching out
to caress the side of his face.
It wasn't true. I cared about Adrian deeply but he wasn't %imitri. I could
still care and love someone, but that didn't mean we had to be romantically
involved. Adrian was one of my best friends, and it hurt me to see him go
through pain. It hurt me even more knowing that I was the reason he was
hurting.
-I haven't been allowed to visit your dreams since the last time I talked to
you: I know you're asleep, I can feel it, but your dreams are blocked from
me. It's a charm isn't it$-
I *uickly looked away from his eyes, not wanting to see the hurt that was
know shinning in them. -4es, I had 2issa infuse a charm to keep you out of my
dreams.-
-I knew it,- he breathed, sounding very hurt.
-It's not what you think<- I began *uickly, but he didn't let me finish before
he started yelling at me.
-4ou know what they say here$- 'e yelled, his eyes flashing. 'e leaned away
from my outstretched hand, and I dropped it back into my lap. -hey say
that you're +ust escaping your death. hat you took everyone that meant
anything to you and got the hell out of here. At first I didn't believe them
because you love me, and I know you do. hen, it became clear, you have
8elikov with you. It's him that you would have took, not me. I was always +ust
your second choice, it's him that you've always loved.-
-Adrian<- I started, but he interrupted me again before I could e!plain.
-I don't blame you,- he said softly, -I always knew it was him but I risked my
heart anyway. 0hen he turned I was happy, I knew it was selfish because
you were hurting but I thought I had a chance. A real chance with the girl of
my dreams. hen he came back and I knew it was a matter of time before
you broke my heart.-
-Adrian, I'm not escaping my death. I'm coming back.- he words seemed to
hang in the humid summer air. It was only in the *uiet following the words
that I realized I said the wrong thing. hat wasn't what he wanted to hear,
he didn't want promises of my return, he wanted promises of my love.
/either of us said anything for a long time and it was Adrian who finally
broke the uncomfortable silence.
-hat's all you have to say$-
I knew he wanted me to deny that I still loved %imitri, but I couldn't bring
myself to lie to him. I loved him too much. I didn't want to keep hurting him,
over and over again, and that was all I was doing. he sooner I let him go,
the faster he could heal. And he would heal, he would fall in love with
someone that was made +ust for him. 3omeone that could love him
unconditionally no matter who came back into her life.
I took a deep breath and said the only words that would let Adrian began to
heal. -I'm sorry.-
Adrian automatically knew what I was apologizing for, +ust like I knew he
would. 'e nodded and looked away from me. 3uddenly, it started to rain.
hunder was crackling in the sky and lightening blazed lighting the night with
its bolts. Adrian got up from the bench and turned his back on me, the
dream slowly starting to disappear the farther away he got.
-Adrian:- I shouted, running after him. he closer I got to him the clearer
the dream became again. 'e stopped walking and I *uickly caught up with
him, the rain soaking every part of me. 'e didn't turn around when I tapped
on his shoulder. -2ook at me.-
3lowly he turned around, and I noticed that there was a tear falling slowly
down his face. I took his face in my hands and kissed his lips softly. ,y hand
caressed the side of his face, wiping away the tear that had fallen. 'is
hands played with my hair, twirling it around his fingers.
0e both knew this was a goodbye kiss. It was soft, tender and sweet but it
held no promises of a future. It was final, the end, and it was the most
perfect goodbye kiss. I finally pulled away from him, trying not to notice the
hurt in his eyes. 3omehow, whenever I looked into his eyes, my heart always
melted. -I will always love you,- I whispered in his ear, my voice tender, -but
sometimes love +ust isn't enough.-
-I understand,- he breathed. 'is breath was warm against my neck, hot
compared to the rain falling around us. 'is arms closed around my waist,
holding me in his embrace. -.ust like loving him will always be apart of you,
loving me will always be apart of your heart.-
-I wouldn't have it any other way,- I said softly, stepping out of his hug. I
held onto his hand and he gazed into my eyes.
he dream disappeared, returning me to my dreamless sleep. I instantly
woke with a start, breathing heavy. I looked down at my hand, noticing for
the first time I wasn't wearing my charmed ring, the one that prevented
Adrian from accessing my dreams. It must have fallen off during the battle
but I could not bring myself to regret the dream.
I felt a million times lighter after breaking up with Adrian, like I could
suddenly sprout wings and fly away. It wasn't that I was happy we were over,
I was happy I could love %imitri without feeling guilty. 0e could love each
other without feeling guilty.
I tried to go back to sleep but after much tossing and turning I finally got
up and walked to the wing of the house opposite of mine. I walked *uietly
through the marble floored halls, not wanting to wake anyone in the middle
of the night.
#stentatious.
hat's the only word that could accurately describe Abe's house, if you
could even call it that, mansion would be a better world. he house, or
mansion, sat on several acres of land with a swimming pool in back. he
mansion was made of e!pensive looking stones, all the color of white sand on
some e!otic beach. It was four stories with big bay windows at random
places that overlooked the yard. /ot that you could see anything with the
big black curtains the covered the windows, keeping out all of the sunlight.
he yard was easily the prettiest lawn I had ever seen, but maybe it only
seemed that way because it was so uni*ue. Instead of lush, green grass the
ground was dirt filled with stones in different shades of green. Abe vaguely
mentioned the stones were imported from different places around the world
and that it cost a fortune to fill the entire yard.
I gently knocked on the door in front of me. o my great surprise Christian
answered it, his black hair sticking out in all directions and his blue eyes still
partially closed. I could see 2issa's blonde hair sprawled out across a pillow,
still sound asleep. -0hat the hell are you doing$- 'e hissed, rubbing his
eyes.
-3orry,- I whispered, -wrong room.-
Christian raised his eyebrows, staring at me in disbelief. -It's the middle of
the night, who the hell are you going to see$- hen his eyes widened as he
realized the only person I would be going to see. -#h.-
-.ust go back to sleep,- I muttered.
-I hope you know what you're doing, &ose.- I heard him say as he closed the
door to his room.
3o did I.
I was about to +ust go back to my room when the door beside Christian's
opened, revealing a fully alert 6uardian. -&ose$- %imitri asked, stepping into
the hall. -Is everything okay$- 'is hair was ruffled and flat on one side, and
he looked incredibly cute. It was amazing to me that something so deadly
could be so attractive.
I nodded. -I +ust couldn't sleep. /ightmare.-
-/either can I,- he said, holding up a small paperback book. -I was +ust about
to go outside and read but we could do something else if you want;-
-/o,- I said, surprising myself, -I'll come outside with you.-
'e gave me a small smile and we started down the hall. here were huge
pictures hanging in all the hallways and I was startled to see that my father
had great taste in art. 0ell, it looked like great taste to me, but I knew very
little about art. 3till, they were all beautiful to me.
-Is there a lot on your mind$- %imitri asked, his voice soft.
-here's always a lot on my mind, Comrade.- I teased, but it came out
sounding more serious than I intended.
%imitri caught my hand and pulled me to a stop. 'e twirled me around to
face him, his brown orbs staring into my own. -4ou're not going to die.- 'e
growled, -I won't let you. 0e'll figure something out.-
-hat's not worrying me,- I murmured. -0ell, it doesn't worry me until
someone mentions it.-
-3orry,- he whispered, letting go of my hand with a gentle s*ueeze. -It's
+ust yesterday you sounded so resigned, like you don't even want to fight for
your life. I can't help keep you alive if you've already given up on living.-
Again I noticed how lovely his accent was, it was like music to my ears.
3omething about his words sounded incredibly sweet, and it made my heart
leap inside my chest.
0e finally made it to the yard and sat down on a wicker love seat with a
bright red cushion. -4ou're going to be very bored out here,- %imitri
laughed, -we can do something else if you want.-
I shook my head. -&ead it to me.-
'e laughed and looked at me for a moment before reading from his book. I
wasn't listening to the words, I was watching him. 'is brown eyes were
bright, and I realized +ust how much I missed them when they were ringed
with red. 'is eyes were one of his most beautiful features and nothing would
ever be as beautiful to me. I stared at his lips while he read the words and I
had a sudden urge to kiss him.
-I can't think when you look at me like that,- %imitri said, dropping his book
and turning to look at me.
-hen don't think,- I said, reaching out and wrapping my arms around his
neck. I kissed him. At first it started out soft and gentle, but soon enough it
was deep and passionate. 5very time I kissed him it was like the first, it
made every cell in my body burn with its fire, and I never felt more alive
then while kissing him.
-I love you,- I whispered as I pulled away from him. -4ou are my reason for
living.-
I kissed him again. 'e pulled me closer to him, deepening our kiss. 'e didn't
tell me he loved me back, and he didn't shower me with compliments and
sweet nothings, but at that moment I didn't care. he kiss was all I cared
about, his mouth on mine, making a beautiful song that only my heart could
understand and I was slowly realizing that was the meaning of love.
Chapter 17
-/o,- %imitri said, for what seemed like the hundredth time. I ignored him
and turned my attention back to Abe.
-2ike I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted,- I shot a glare at
%imitri, -we are going to the bank as soon as it opens, trying to figure out a
name for this bank account.-
-/o<- %imitri began again, but my father cut him off smoothly, not even
glancing in %imitri's direction.
%imitri, Abe and I were sitting at a huge dinner table, waiting for 2issa,
Christian and ,ia to +oin us before we began eating breakfast. I stifled a
yawn and looked out the window, where the curtains were pulled back so you
could see the sun making it's descent below the horizon, thinking about the
night I had spent with %imitri. here had been a lot of making out and a lot
of pulling away, the kissing was mostly my doing while %imitri pulled away
each time. 5ven after I told him I broke up with Adrian he did nothing but
stroke my hair and give me a small kiss on the forehead saying that was the
best news he heard all day. I kept telling myself to be patient with %imitri,
he had been through hard times and he was still facing them, but it was hard
not to feel hurt.
-I see nothing wrong with that,- Abe said, a small, mischievous smile turning
up the corners of his lips, -but ,r. 8elikov seems to.-
I saw %imitri's face fall when my father used the title -,r.- instead of
-6uardian- and felt a twinge of sadness for him too, but it *uickly passed, my
anger on the sub+ect finally reaching the surface.
-'e's being overly paranoid,- I said, shooting %imitri another glare. -'e
doesn't want me to go with them.-
-&ose,- %imitri sighed, his voice sounding very e!asperated, we'd been
having this argument for the past two hours. -It's not that I don't want you
to come with us, I +ust don't think it's the smartest idea.-
,y father finally looked a %imitri, something that he had been avoiding since
entering the room, and raised a *uizzical eyebrow. -Continue.-
-If &ose comes with us we have a much bigger chance of getting recognized,-
%imitri began, turning his attention from my father and not looking at me.
-(eople are most afraid of the Gueen's murder, not the people that helped
her escape. hey'll most likely be looking out for her and not us.-
-hey're humans, they aren't looking for us at all:- I shouted, burring my
head in my hands.
-0hat about the Alchemists. hey are human and they are looking for you<
they will recognize you.- %imitri countered, and I had to admit he made a
point.
-I agree with %imitri,- my father said.
-8ut 2issa can charm another ring to change my appearance and I can wear
sunglasses and a hat if that makes 6uardian 8elikov happy,- I said suddenly,
shooting %imitri a smile, hoping to win my fathers approval.
-If what makes 6uardian 8elikov happy, &ose$- Christian asked as he came
down the long, marble stair case, ,ia and 2issa following behind him. 'e has
a smirk plastered on his face and my hand twitched, wanting to knock that
look off of his face.
-%imitri is being paranoid about me going to the bank with you guys later
today, so I said that I would disguise myself it that makes him happy.- I
snapped.
-#h, what else makes 6uardian 8elikov happy$- Christian smirked. 2issa was
looking on at the conversation clearly amused, Christian had obviously told
her about my late night disturbance, but ,ia was looking utterly confused.
-I don't know what makes him happy, but I know what would make me happy
right now,- I said, my hand twitching again. I gave them my most badass look,
and it worked.
-Chill, &ose,- 2issa said laying a hand on Christian's arm as they sat down
around the table. -2eave her alone, Christian.-
-3orry,- he said, -I had a early morning, more like a late night.-
Abe furrowed his eyebrows, looking between Christian and me. -0hy did you
have a late night$ &ose, what did you do$-
I glared at Christian and he smirked at me, but none of us answered Abe's
*uestion. 0e sat there in uncomfortable silence until ,ia cleared her throat.
-6ood morning,- she said, looking around the table. -Is it okay if &ose goes$-
I was glad she asked Abe the *uestion and not %imitri because I knew I had
a better chance with Abe agreeing to my crazy plans then %imitri. Abe came
to my rescue, and I decided I owed him big time. 'e had helped me ever
since the first day I met him, and I kind of liked it. -&ose can go but<-
-/o 'buts' about it,- I said. I decided I did not owe Abe anything, not
anymore.
-&ose,- he said, his voice calm although I could tell I was irritating him, -will
you let me finish$-
-(robably not,- I muttered.
'e shot me a look and I smiled at him. -At least I'm honest.-
-As I was saying, I don't think all of you should go. wo, maybe three, of you
at the most.- Abe said.
I pointed at myself saying -,y crazy plan, I'm going.-
-I'm going,- 2issa said softly, -this is my family we're finding.-
I nodded and took a bite of my bacon.
-I'm going as protection for the (rincess,- %imitri said.
#f course you are, a nasty voice in my head whispered, going to protect your
savior. Beep her safe because &ose can't do a good +ob.
-/o,- I said suddenly, a little too loud, causing ,ia to knock some orange
+uice out of her glass.
%imitri looked at me and I nibbled on my bacon some more. 'e raised an
eyebrow. -/o$- 'e *uestioned.
-/o.-
-0hy$-
I nibbled on my bacon again before answering. -I'm going to protect her, I
don't need you coming for that.-
-I'm not *uestioning your ability, &ose.- %imitri said softly, his brown eyes
gazing intently into mine.
I turned away and stared out the window again, eating my bacon. -I know.- I
honestly knew he wasn't *uestioning my ability, but it seemed that way. I
knew how to take care of 2issa, I've been doing it all of my life. 3he was
always my first priority, I would never do anything to put her in danger, not
intentionally anyway. -I can protect her,- I muttered, mostly to myself.
-I'll go,- ,ia said, -I want to help.-
I shot her a glare.
-/ot to protect her or anything,- she said *uickly, her eyes focused on
something on her plate, -+ust to help. I can carry a purse or something.-
I laughed at her and she looked up, smiling softly at me.
-I want to go,- Christian said, looking at 2issa. -I'm her boyfriend.-
-3orry,- I said, looking at Christian, -,ia said it first.-
Christian opened his mouth to say something but I got up abruptly and
started storming up the stairs.
-4ou're e!cused,- my father shouted behind me, and I could almost imagine
the smirk on his face.
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