EducationUSA Ukraine

PRE-DEPARTURE ORIENTATION 2013

CULTURAL MISUNDERSTANDINGS
Whoever wants to learn more about American, or other civilizations begins by learning their language. Although translations are useful for a
superficial acuaintance with a culture of any nation! but only the possibility to plunge into the atmosphere of everyday life, to feel, to laugh, to
think can be an ine"haustible source of wonder. #ecause the gained knowledge will not leave space to be afraid of foreign, of the unknown, of
that which is different but, instead, to feel pleasure and advantage of speaking more than one culture.
$n order to understand a foreign language, we need a grammar book and a dictionary. %he better we know how to use this &grammar book&
and this &dictionary&, the less the meaning of the te"t will be misinterpreted. #ut in order to make better interpretation of foreigners, it is
constant need to practice cultural analysis.
$n the following e"amples, taken from Esther Waning 'ulture Shock( USA )*++,- and from personal interviews you will find some
interpretation of certain misunderstandings which occur regularly between Americans and foreigners.
FRIENDLY IS NOT FRIENDS
/ractically everyone agrees that Americans are friendly. 0ery few Americans care to put on snobbish airs, even if they secretly regard
themselves as far above the crowd. /art of being superior is to appear not to think you are. %he /resident of the USA emphasizes what a regular
guy he is. A college professor who goes fishing with plumbers will brag about it! he too is one of the boys, not an intellectual in an ivory tower.
%hus the friendly 1i is an acknowledgment that whoever you are, you have rights. #ut saying hello doesn2t commit you to anything.
3riendliness should not be confused with friendship. 4any foreigners slip up here, and mistakenly think that that boundless cordiality means
they are going to have lots of friends. %hen they become disillusioned and think Americans are terribly superficial and shallow in their
friendships. %rue friends are not easier to come by here than anywhere else.
$n many countries, most friends date from schooldays, and it is hard to make new ones thereafter. 3or Americans it is the e"ception rather than
rule to remain in one place, and the school friends are usually left behind. 5ew friends rise up to fill new stages of life. Even when the locale
remains the same, new friends step in to match life changes. college friends, work friends, club friends, neighbors, new6hobby friends, sports
friends.
7nce has got a friend, an American will be careful not to presume on him8her. %hat bothering someone is an everlasting concern of Americans,
even among good friends.
9ussian people live in each others pockets, said one woman. $t2s completely different here. :ou keep your distance. A best attraction as a friend
is that he is not demanding. 5eediness scares people.
As might be e"pected, there are many lonely people in America. 3oreigners discover that people here watch television so much because they2re
lonely 6 they have no friends or neighbors to talk to.
TOUCHING
Americans are what is known as a non6contact people. $f in a moment of warmth, a 9ussian man rests his hand on an American mans thigh, the
American is stricken. ;ikewise, two American men would never hold hands. 5or would two American women, although they would not be as
put off by the whole idea as men are. $n conversation, Americans usually stand at least an arms length apart and are made uncomfortable by
people who press closer, and are careful not to breathe into people2s faces.
TALKING
#ecause it is important to be assertive, Americans speak fairly loudly. 3oreigners sometimes mistake the loudness for anger when an American
is only trying to make himself understood.
Americans are taught to look into people2s eyes during conversation. Someone who instead looks around or down appears shifty, although if
fact one doesn2t stare continuously at the other person, but glances elsewhere every few seconds.
'onversation is generally less lively than in ;atin countries, where everyone talks at once. When someone talks here, everyone is e"pected to
listen, no matter how dull the talker may be. %alk isn2t lighthearted e"change for Americans! it is informational e"change. $n some cultures,
people will take the opinion of a trusted friend. Americans want the facts so that they can make up their own minds. As nearly every cultural
observer has noted, Americans love statistics.
What they do not like is silence. Should everyone in a group run out of things to say, an an"ious pall descends until somebody saves the day by
producing a sub<ect.
ETIQUETTE
3ormality seems undemocratic to Americans, and they dislike the rituals of etiuette, inculcated in childhood, that distinguish between classes in
other societies. Easy manners contribute to the fluidity of the society.
7n the whole, the lack of formality makes integrating easier for the foreigners. %here is no need to walk around in fear of offending people. #ut,
the advantage of a high conte"t culture is that a learned protocol saves one having to impose his behavior. Americans are often at a loss for
words. An African =ulu, on hearing of a death in someones family, can instantly deliver an elaborate and beautiful speech. Americans in this
case mumble sorry and change the sub<ect.
THE CASUAL LIFE
$nformality pervades American culture. %he forms of language do not change when people address a superior, as they do in many languages.
/eople dress casually as much as possible. Americans slouch in chairs, lean against walls, and put their feet on desks.
%here are, however, boundaries. $n church, people sit up straight. Slang is not used addressing the <udge. #ut a lot of distinctions are subtle and
foreigners can step on toes by trying to become American6casual before understanding the culture very well.
>egrees of casualness do leave a lot of room for confusion. %eachers who are informal and friendly and open with their students want to be
liked! they do not wish to be treated as any other friend. Should their students respond by becoming too personal or forward with the teacher,
they will discover a frosty barrier. %he top layer of American is very open and anyone can penetrate it. $t is the inner layers that are hard to
crack. Some Americans remain forever impenetrable.
NEVER RELAXED
9ela"ing is e"actly what Americans are not very good at. $t <ust doesn2t fit with their belief in progress. Americans take the utilitarian
philosophy seriously, which is that only useful activities are valuable, meaningful, and moral. Unproductive activity is therefore useless,
meaningless, and immoral.
%he conviction that you succeed or fail by your own efforts 6 rather than by the whims of fate 6 is one that adds a degree of tension to life.
%he whole concept of achievement, whether in career or hobby, makes passing the hours in idle conversation seem like a waste of time.
According to #en 3ranklin, %ime lost is never found again. %oo much sitting around, and the American gets nervous and wants to be up doing
something.
$ never knew how important a weekend could be, says a 'hinese resident here. %here is so much pressure at work, one deadline after another.
%he person who never rela"ed may turn to drugs for help 6 hence Americans have some clue to the popularity of alcohol, cocaine, mari<uana,
and the boob tube )television-, which induces a drug6like lethargy and a dullness of mind almost as effectively as the real drugs.
SELF-IMPROVEMENT
$t is doubtful whether there is anywhere else in the world a people so intent on improving themselves. Americans nearly uniue belief
in progress includes the propositions that individuals can change their natures. 3oreigners tend to be skeptical of these American efforts. A
9ussian person during an interview said, %he kind of self6improvement people go in for here are <ust superficial fads. 4y idea of self6
improvement is moral.
3ew of Americans want to live for others. /sychologists have made saintliness unfashionable by determining that its the malad<usted person
who wants to be a saint. %hey say that we must love ourselves before we can love other people. 3oreigners usually think that Americans are
uite good at loving themselves, but actually, the competitive atmosphere in which Americans live makes people very critical of
themselves. >epression is a ma<or problem, particularly among women.
$t may be, as many foreigners claim, that Americans simply make problems for themselves. With plenty to eat and good <ob, what could
be wrong? #ut affluence brings problems of its own, for one the realization that money isn2t everything. 4any people never get this far, and
continue to think if they only had a little more money they2d be happy.
DIETING
>espite evidence that at least +,@ of the weight lost in dieting is regained, Americans remain irresistibly attracted to new diets and weight loss
gimmicks. %he top6selling kinds of books in this country are. *- cookbooks, and A- diet books. %here are indeed a large number of obese people
in this country. /eople from many cultures get fat here.
%here is an unfortunate pre<udice against fat people, which comes from failure to understand that the fat person is a victim of a metabolic
problem, not a person lacking in self6control. 3oreigners in particular, surprised to see so much obesity, often suffer from this pre<udice.
THE YOUTH CULT
Americans have enormous faith in new ideas, new techniues. $f schools aren2t trying to solve their problems by imposing new teaching
methods, they are trying to solve them by bringing in new computers. Advertisements will make their entire claim for a product the fact that it is
5EW. %hey don2t even have to add #etter. 5ew assumes better. $f nothing else, young people are newer, and even their unoriginal ideas may
look new.
All people like to hear about how very young they look. 7ne views old age as a stage of life when one is not in demand, when one has nothing
to contribute. $n a society, where achievement is everything, those who are past contributing fall from grace.
>espite all this, there are many old people living enviably 6 active, busy, traveling, and contributing. %here are others whose acuired wisdom is
sufficient to sustain them and who remain admired by younger people. $t is most noticeably those without health or money whose lives are the
most pitiable.