The Testimony, by Halina Wagowska

Auschwitz Birkenau - The Swamp - page 43

Arrial at the camp was a relie! an" then a new shock# We steppe" out o! the wagons
onto a long plat!orm, into !resh air an" mi""ay light# The terrible $ourney was obiously
at an en"# Sol"iers with ri!les at the rea"y urge" us along - %Schnell& schnell&% - towar"s
the entrance o! the camp# Some o!!icers hel" large Alsatian "ogs on short leashes#
'haim (umkowski was in the same transport, an" was "rien in an open car along the
plat!orm# He wae" to us, sai" %)o not worry,* an" soon, when a shot was hear",
someone near me sai", %That is the en" o! him#%
+nsi"e, the !irst segregation took place by or"ering all men to the right, all women to the
le!t# ,ather looke" back at us, -other an" me, an" wae"# This was the last time + saw
him#
page 4.#
As they worke" they gae us aluable a"ice# Har"ly moing their lip an" with eyes
aerte" they whispere" that this was a section o! Auschwitz calle" Birkenau# They
pointe" out a guar" as a ma", trigger happy one####Another tol" me, %/ou are in a swap,%
which was a bit puzzling at the time#####
We were tol" to !orm a 0ueue to get numbere"# We coul" now see those who ha" been
selecte" !rom among our group be!ore the shower# They were climbing into a couple o!
trucks through the back "oors an" were all ery thin, cripple" or ol"#
+t was eening now, an" there was a su""en heay "ownpour o! rai"# Swearing, the
guar"s marche" the line o! women into a nearby barrack, but + an" seeral others were
taken towar"s the trucks# There was a pile o! woo"en planks that we ha" to put on the
now swampy groun" in !ront o! the trucks to preent them getting bogge" "own# We
were kicke" an" pushe" into the mu" by the soake" guar"s !or not working !ast enough#
1mpty trucks kept coming back !or more cargo# 2ate that night we were put into a
barrack an" + was now separate" !rom 3pt$er
####
page 44
-ore planks o! woo" ha" to be put oer pu""les on the roa" an", as trucks passe" oer
them, + was oerwhelme" by the !ear that -other might be insi"e# Then, in one o! the
reshu!!les o! inmates to keep the barracks !ull an" make room !or new arrials, + was
reunite" with -other# We "i" not speak, $ust hel" han"s all night#
There were many nake" para"es to cull the !rail an" to select new workers !or the
arious tasks aroun" the camp# ,rom a "istance, -other was able to see me at my
tasks in our barracks# She was among those not selecte" !or tasks, surely because she
ha" !ewer muscles on her skeleton than + - an" that was because o! the way that my
parents ha" augmente" my !oo" rations in 2itzmannsta"t with some o! theirs# This was
a great source o! guilt !or me, an" because she was not emploey" + was scare" that on
my return !rom work + might not !in" there there#
###
1ight o! us were or"ere" into a task-!orce known as the To" 5omman"o, the "eath
s0ua", an" more came !rom other barracks# 1ach morning we walke" to one o! the
nearby crematoria where carts !ull o! pile"-up bo"ies were pulle" an" pushe" towar"s
the oens by male inmates# -any hun"re"s o! bo"ies were taken !rom the gas
chambers eery "ay to this one, only one o! seeral such !urnances#
We put each bo"y on a long plank o! woo" an" let it sli"e in through one o! the semi-
oal iron "oors# 6ccasionally, we coul" !eel a weak pulse in the arm or leg as we moe"
the bo"ies, but no other signs o! li!e# We were kicke" or beaten when seen to be
slowing "own, an" worke" seen long "ays each week# There were arme" oerseers in
uni!orms that suggeste" higher rank an" they were obsesse" with spee" an" e!!iciency#
The carts were or"ere" into new positions so that unloa"ing coul" be "one !rom both
si"es at one time#
+ clearly recall a large wire crate !ull o! pairs o! spectacles - un!ol"e", some with broken
lenses being taken to the collection area# + remember thinking that ha" they all been
!ol"e" they woul" take up less space# The maniacal e!!iciency aroun" me was
imprinting itsel! on me# /ears later, when able to re!lect, + thought that a worl"-best-
practice abbatoir probably coul" not match the spee" an" e!!iciency o! the slaughtering
an" processing o! carcasses in the Auschwitz-Birkenau 'oncentration camp#
###page .7
The oens were shut "own perio"ically to remoe the ashes that accumulate" below#
These ashes, with bits o! charre" bones, teeth an" parts o! "entures, were use" to
reclaim the swamp# We carrie" them in buckets to a selecte" area an" use" the bottom
o! the emptie" bucket to push them into the mu"# A new e!!iciency measure was
intro"uce" one "ay8 tying two buckets together in a way that allowe" us to carry !our
buckets each#
The reclaiming o! the swamp was easier physically an" emotionaly than !illing the oens#
Somehow it was not so "ire an", irrationally, + was not paralyse" by that same !ear#
6er the seeral weeks o! my work in the crematoria + wishe" these breaks in the
swamp were more !re0uent an" longer#
###
At the en" o! the series 9oseph Bronowski is seen stan"ing, then s0uatting, on the
swamp o! Birkenau in Auschwitz# He picks up some soil an" says that the ashes o! his
relaties lie here# +nstantly + thought that, !or all + knew, + may hae been them into this
swamp# + was surprise" by the shock + !elt, an" the sharp an" prolonge" return o!
memory# +t took me a long time to stop walking through the ashes again#
'hapter ,rie"a page .:
The ,irst cracks in the rigi" routine o! e;termiantion in Auschwitz-Birkenau appeare"
towar" the en" o! <=44# While large transports o! newcomers continue" to arrie at this
obiously !inal "estination, groups o! inmates were now being sent ut as well# The
numbering an" rollcalls were aban"one", an" among the inmates there were rumours o!
(ussian an" Allie" armies marching towar"s >ermany#
6ne eening, on return !rom my work in crematoria, + saw a group o! women being
marche" out o! our section o! the camp# -y barrack was empty so, assuming that
-other was in the group being her"e" out, + $oine" it whent he guar" got busy counting
an" yelling at those selecte" to leae# We were or"ere" onto a cattle-train an" there, to
my relie!, + !oun" -other# Another long, cross-country $ourney !ollowe", with many "ying
on the way# We receie" a bucket o! water per wagon, an" a slice o! brea" !or those who
line" up at a stop in a mi""le o! a !iel" somewhere#
6n arrial at this new camp there were showers, an" our soile" uni!orms were
e;change" !or a ariety o! ciilian clothing# 1ach carrie" a number prece"e" by th
letters %?@% that was printe" on the !ront an" back, below shoul"er leel# @ery small
"resses were issue" to tall people an" large ones to petite !igures# The oerseers were
helpless with laughter as we were ma"e to march roun" an" roun" in a circle#
%6l"* inmates tol" us that this was Stuttho!!, a concentrration camp in 1ast ?russia on
the coast o! the Baltic Sea# The letters %?@% stoo" !or ?olitische @erbrecher meaning
political criminals# +nmates in other sections were >erman communists, (ussian ?6Ws,
saboteurs, among others# +n a "istant section we coul" see a group o! women with long,
blon"e hair# They looke" healthy an" "igni!ie" in complete contrast to us# We learne"
they were 1stonian !ree"om !ighters#
page .4
The latrine was an open hole in the groun" outsi"e with slippery e"ges, making its use
!raught with the "anger o! !alling in# The oerseers were mostly !emale, pathologically
sa"istic an" highly inentie in ways o! punishing an" humiliating us# 1arlier arrials to
Stuttho! calle" it %the bottom o! the hell%#
Apart !rom the early morning rollcall an" the remoal o! "ea" bo"ies pile" outsi"e the
barrack, there was nothing to "o all "ay o!!icially# There was a group selecte" to go to
work on nearby !arms, some on a "aily basis# 6thers staye" on the !arms !or a perio"#
They were well !e" there, an" on return woul" smuggle in a !ew carrots or a small pieces
o! other !oo"#
+ was not selecte" an" was gla" to stay with my mother, again at a sa!e "istance# She
was now ery weary an" emaciate"#
+t was in this nether worl" that + met an" be!rien"e" the remarkable ,rie"a# + "on%t know
her surname - we all le!t those outsi"e the prison - but + still remember her number8 ?@
A33.B# C+ was ?@ A47B.#D She was sent to Stuttho! some months earlier !rom
Bu"apest, where till then 9ews were allowe" relatie !ree"om# She was a uniersity
pro!essor an" + think that her sub$ect was sociology - not something + coul" well
comprehen" then#
page .B
But wheneer + looke" puzzle", ,rie"a e;plaine" patiently# She won"ere" how )ante
woul" hae written his +n!erno ha" he spent time in Stuttho!# + aske" who was )ante
an" what was his +n!erno, an" ,ire"a tol" me about this <3th century ,lorentine poet at
length#
page B:
?hysical an" erbal abuse lost its humiliating e!!ect on us through its !re0uency, an"
because it only incriminate" the >ermans# But their spitting in our !aces was har" to get
use" to8 to me, it was ery "epressing#
page B. - !logge" 47 lashes !or sen"ing a message
page BA
The months o! the year announce" themseles appro;imately through the seasonal
weather# + was winter, now, later Eoember or early )ecember, we thought#
page B=
The camp comman"ant isite" more o!ten too# He lie" in a cottage outsi"e the camp at
the e"ge o! the !orest, an" we coul" see him playing with a to""ler an" a puppy "og
outsi"e his house# We saw a ten"er an" a!!ectinate man, but once insi"e our camp he
became a monster an" his attacks, unlike the others, were always pre"ictable# His
metho" was to "elier a karate-like chop to the area between the ear an" the chin, which
neer !aile" to cause a loss o! balance, an" one always !ell backwar"s# He woul" then
sink the heel o! his heay arm boots into arious parts o! the ictim%s bo"y# We learne"
not to turn oer to protect the !ace an" ab"omen because he then kicke" har"er to turn
the ictim up again# ,rie"a calle" him a 9ekyll-an"-Hy"e type - another puzzle to me,
until she relate" Steenson%s story o! goo" an" eil#
-r Hy"e use" his routine on me one "ay, anb" it got me a !racture o! the skull Cthe
ethymoi", as + learne" laterD an" a broken nose, seeral broken ribs an" two "ays in a
coma, + was still unconscious the ne;t "ay an" absent !rom the rollcall# + was "umpe"
on the pile o! bo"ies outsi"e the barrack, but -other an" ,rie"a "ragge" me back be!ore
the cart arrie"# Somehow they proppe" me up !or rollcall on the !ollowing "ay#
page 47
The special assemblies also became more !re0uent "uring this time, an" we were
re0uire" to watch the hangings o! one or more men# There was no announcement o!
their crimesF we thought most were (ussian prisoners o! war#
+ remember one in particular# Some struggle" an" others went 0uietly, but this young
boy bust out singing the Soiet national anthem in a beauti!ul tenor oice# He sang until
he slumpe" in the noose####The "ate o! 'hristmas 1e announce" itsel! through the
raucous singing o! carols by the "runken guar"s in their 0uarters# 'hrist%s birth"ay was
celebrate" with more beatings an" a lot o! ran"om shootings#
page 4: -other "ie" late 9anaury <=4.
page 4. !ell behin" in eacuation march - -arch <=4., !e" by ciilians
page 44 picke" up by (e" Army *+ remeber a !emale army "octor, her !re0uent in$ections
with large amounts o! some substance, presumably itamins, the pain!ul "ressin go! my
leg an" a !unnel in my mouth oozing a sweet goo# + was tol" that my leg was
gangrenous an" woul" hae to be amputate"# + re!use" an" the "octor got angry, but
her assistant o!!ere" to try the trick o! applying compresses using my urine# This !olk
me"icine worke" an", a!ter a while, the skin close" up# He sae" my leg#
####+ ha" been !oun" an" picke" up by a small unit o! the (ussian army that !ollowe" the
!rontline# )oktorka Eina looke" a!ter the sol"iers with minor in$uries, while the seerely
in$ure" were taken back to hospital in nearby towns that ha" been liberate" by the army#
page A=
+t was 9u"ith Winogra", my !rien" !rom 2itzmannsta"t >hetto, who !oun" me registere"
in >"ansk an" sent a note saying that she an" her !ather wante" me to come an" stay
with them# By then + was able to walk without a stick, albeit with a limp, an" was happy
to !in" someone + knew a!ter months o! being !ostere" by strangers# 9u"ith ha" returne"
to 2o"z !rom a labour camp in >ermany, an" some "ays later ran into her !ather
returning !rom antoher camp - one o! the heart-stopping steet reunions# They now lie"
in one room o! an apartment, but insiste" + stay with them#
+n those "ays the age o! maturity was twenty-one an" below that age one%s signature
was not ali"# Her !ather 2u"wig Winogra" became my legal guar"ian#
page =4 Barbara chemistyr stu"ent :B years ol" asks about bloo" in matzos brea"#
page =B
+n early <=4A -a; ,arber, my legal guar"ian, was preparing to migrate to +srael with his
wi!e an" son# He sai" to me ery bluntly, %?olan" "oesn%t want you, an" you "on%t want
another war# 'ome with us#%
page <7.
+ ha" met a group o! people in the re!ugee register o!!ices o! the (e" 'ross an" GE(AA
who were also looking !or suriing relaties, an" they became !rien"s# They too were
consi"ering emigrating# There were sponsors in Swe"en, 'ana"a an" Australia# 6ne
particular !rien", a boy whom + later marrie", ha" a "istant relatie in Australia, so we
chose to go there#
page <AB
A !ew years later my husban" H"zich "ie" o! cancer a!ter a long an" "rea"!ul illness# He
was 3B years ol"# We ha" no chil"ren# I(emarrie" >eorge, mother -aminka !rom
?ragueJ
page <A4 -*Eow in :7<<, we are both in our ninth "eca"e, an" too ol" !or a long !light#*
page <==
+n <==. + took part in a pro$ect calle" %'hil" Holocaust Suriors8 Scars le!t .7 years on%,
which inole" lengthy interiews by a psychologist#
page :7<
-y !irst testimony was written answering a 0uestionnair in a pro$ect entitle"
%'onse0uences o! ?re$u"ice%# The :4 0uestions mostly aske" respon"ents to "escribe
the con"itions an" treatment e;perience" in each place o! incarceration# -y responses
took nineteen type" A4 pages#
A year later, in <=A:, Thomas 5eneally was researching a book on 6skar schin"ler, the
>erman in"ustrialist an" Eazi ?arty member####5enneally appeale" on T@ !or any
in!ormation that might ai" his research# + sent a copy o! the 0uestionnaire + ha"
answere"# +n his prompt an" gracious reply, he a""e"8 %+ am "elighte" that you hae
recor"e" your e;periences# + beliee all those 9ewish suriors who can manage to
con!ront their e;perience shoul" leae a recor" o! it# +t is something to show the
reisionists historians o! the !uture who might well try to proe that it neer happene"#%
Ee;t + testi!ie" on a i"eo interiew, !or three long hours, at the 9ewish Holocaust 'entre
in -elbourne# An" in <==. + was interiewe" !or the %'hil" Holocaust Surior8 Scars le!t
.7 years on* pro$ect#
The Suriors o! the Shoah @isual History ,oun"ation was establishe" in the GS on the
procee"s !rom the !ilm Schin"ler%s 2ist# This centre processes testimonies in a special
way to obtain corroboratie ei"ence# 6ral hsitories are o!ten regar"e" as inaccurate
"ue to unreliable memories an" perceptions# They are %anbec"otal%# At the Shoah
,oun"ation a testimony is type" into one o! a long line o! computers that are connecte"
an" cross-in"e;e" in a way that sen"s a signal when similarities such as names o!
places or people occur among the testimonies# When two or more unrelate" people
report an eent at a name" place or an act by a name" person, this is regar"e" as
corrobatre" ei"ence# The report ceases to be anec"otal an" is regar"e" as !act#
The researches at Shoah pose" a""itonal 0uestions to those who ha" testi!ie"
preiously an" aske" !or care!ul an" accurate spelling o! all gien names# The a""itonal
0uestions were many an" elaborate# Another psychologist olunteere" to act as an
interiewer !or this pro$ect# -y answers were i"eo-recor"e" oer si; an" a hal! hours#
Short a!ter that + was at a con!erence workshop run by the +nternational 'ouncil o!
?sychologists in -elbourne where + talke" about ,rie"a an" the boy !rom the pigpen#
page A4
A !ew "ays a!ter this, + was place" with a ?olish !amily that ha" recently arrie" in
>"ansk#
We watche" the !ireworks, on = -ay, "enoting the en" o! the war# + think it was then that
the !ather sai", %At least Hitler ri" ?olan" o! 9ews#% So + le!t an" aske" the ?olish
authorities, which ha" taken oer the a"ministration o! >"ansk, to be sent to 2o"z where
+ might !in" people + knew, an" to where my !ather woul" return#
page A4
+ came to 2o"z !rom >"ansk in September <=4.
page 4A
These tough guys ha" $ust been through Stuttho! an" they talke" o! what they ha" seen
there an" wept####
Sasha was ery protectie o! me# + was his %!in"% among the carnage o! Stutthbo!, an"
he sai" this was a goo" omen !or the unit#
page A7
6ur progress westwar"s was slow, with many stopoers# The army woul" not enter
towns or illages until they ha" surroun"e" them completely, Sasha e;plaine"# By the
time we got to )anzig, >"ansk, when part o! ?olan" - now bombe" an" !ree o!
>ermans, + coul" walk with a stick an" ha" put some pa""ing between my skin an"
bones# There was no real hospital there in bombar"e" >"ansk# We were statione" in
an elegant three-storey house, where only the roo! ha" been "amange" by shell!ireF
!rom some rooms we coul" see the sky#
page 4B
Seeral "ays passe" an" then the rumble o! the "istant artillery !ire grew nearer an" the
!oo" supplies stoppe"# + remember seeral "ays o! snow blizzars an" we kept un"er the
straw# Ileg !rostbitten got "ark an" starte" throbbing - !eer, semiconsciousJ
page <
+ "on%t know many "etails o! their early li!e, but + know that both were orphane" an"
impoerishe" "uring Worl" War +# -other was apprentice" to a "ressmaker# Singing
lessons, to "eelop her !ine lyric soprano oice, were aban"one", een though they
were latr o!!ere" to her !ree o! charge# Singing coul" not assure brea"winning# ,ather
progresse" !rom messenger boy in a large te;tile-retailing !irm to bookkeeper%s assistent,
a"n then to chie! bookkeeper#
They met, !ell in loe, marrie", an" combine" their skills to run a te;tile, clothing an"
couturier business#
page :
A!ter + was born, in <=37, my parents moe" !rom their be"sitter to a larger !lat an"
-other staye" at home#
page B-4
Strange man o!!ers her chocolates an" is arreste"
page <3-<4
loote" in September <=3= an" house trashe"
page <B
Stanislawa 2emanska -Stasia
page :3
+ remember teasing an" testing Stasia with the slogan %9ews to -a"agascar&% which was
popular at that time#
page :4-:.
The small number o! 9ews who lie" in ?oznan were or"ere" out# We were rea"y to go
to 2on"on, where my !ather%s sister lie", but we $ust %misse" the bus%# War, though
e;pecte", broke out un"eclare" an" earlier than anyone ha" thought possible# + later
learne" that my parents ha" sent some o! their saings to my aunt in 2on"on !or our
use#
With $ust two suitcases each we went to 2o"z, a large city in the centre o! ?olan"# We
ma"e our way to central ?olan" by train, army truck, then horse an" buggy, changing as
each ehicle became "amage" by artillery !ire# 2o"z was !ully occupie" by the >ermans
when we got there# ,or a while we staye" at my aunt%s place# Stasia as the only one in
our !amily who "i" not hae to wear the yellow Star o! )ai", an" there!ore was not at
risk o! assault or arrest in the steets or when 0ueuing !or !oo"#
-eanwhile, a barbe"-wire !ence was bieng put arou"n the in"ustrial part o! 2o"z to
contain the 2itzmannsta"t >hetto, which became a labour camp where many perishe"#
All Aryans were or"ere" to leae the area be!ore April <=47, an" 9ews !rom 2o"z an"
many other places were ushere" in# Stasia re!use" to leae, an" came with us into the
ghetto# We were allotte" one room wtih two be"s, so + share" one wih Stasia an" my
parents ha" the other#
!orce" to go by two >erman sol"iers - proi"e" !oo" through wire, *pushing a pram*
coul"n%t !in" her a!ter the war#
page :=
This, my !irst an" su""en encounter with situational ethics, was traumatic# + now ha" to
preten" that + was thirteen, not ten, an" "o it conincingly, with no hesitatin, blushing or
aerting eye contact when aske" my age# We practise" it, an" + was chi"e" !or not
per!orming well - when $ust a while ago, telling a lie ha" been a big no-no in our !amily#
-y parents plea"e" !or a better per!ormance, an" stresse" it was a matter o! li!e an"
"ea"# ,ather, the wise pessimist, sai" that + must be seen as use!ul, as chil"ren un"er
the age o! twele were not regar"e" as much o! a work!orce, an" thus at greater risko!
"isposal# -y young cousins "isappere" this way# To the unknown, we use" to say#
,ortunatly, + was tall !or my age, an" with my long, plaite" hair coile" on top o! my hea" +
"i" look ol"er#
Istaye" with aunt an" two cousin ages 4 an" = be!ore moing into ghettoJ
page 33 - worke" as milliner !actory
page 4<
The $ourney out o! the 2itzmannsta"t >hetto was memorable# The close" goo"s trains
were so oercrow"e" that we ha" to take turns at sitting "own# We traelle" ery slowly,
an" there were !re0uent stops !or seeral hours# 6n tow occasions we got o!! to get
brea" an" water !rom the last wagon# Though this was in an open !iel", we were not
allowe" to take out the "ea" or clean the wagons, only to empty the buckets that sere"
as toilets#
6ne o! the escorting sol"iers !oun" a young baby in our wagon# He tore it !rom the
mother, swung it upwar"s by the leg an" smashe" its skull on the !loor# Bloo" an"
yellow bits o! brain ooze" out# He was about to shoot the mother but change" his min",
grinne" an" le!t# An o!!icer looke" in an" sai" something about not alloing ermin to
multiply# The mother went beserk# She waile" or laughe" like a hyena - anightmarish
soun" - !or the rest o! the $ourney, which took three "ays an" nights#