Research: Investigation phase

Date: Question: Research: (copy and paste) Research: (Own words) Citation (in text)

28/6/14 What makes a
relationship
healthy?

Healthy relationships are fun and make
you feel good about yourself. You can
have a healthy relationship with anyone in
your life family, friends, and the people
you date. Relationships take time and
care to make them healthy. The
relationships you have as a teen are a
special part of your life and will teach you
good lessons about who you are.
Healthy relationships give you the
potential and allow you to feel good about
yourself. You are able to have a healthy
relationship with anyone in your life. These
people can be friends, family or even
people you date. Healthy relationships
require a lot of care and time. The
relationships that you have during your
teen life will be able to teach you lessons
about who you are.

Communication
and sharing
The most important part of any
healthy relationship is
communication. Communication
means that you are able to share
things about yourself and your
feelings. It also means that you listen
to what the other person shares. This
can happen by talking, emailing,
writing, texting, or even using body
language. When you are talking to
someone, look him or her in the eye
to show you are listening.
The most important aspect of a healthy
relationship is communication.
Communication means that you can
express feelings and share personal things.
This means that you can also listen to what
the other person has to say and share. This
can be done by emailing, talking, writing,
texting or body language. Body language
can be as simple as looking in the other
persons eyes to show that you are
listening while they are talking.

Having a healthy means of communication

When you have healthy communication,
everyone feels calm. You can share your
feelings with the other person. You know
that he or she will be there to listen,
support you, and keep personal things
that you share private. The other person
will feel safe with you, too. In healthy
relationships, people do not tell lies.
allows everyone to feel calm. Everyone is
able to share their feelings and thoughts
with one another and know that the other
people are there to support and listen to
you. There will also be a sense of trust for
the other person to keep personal things
you share private. In healthy relationships,
people do not tell lies.

5/7/14 Respect and trust Fights can still happen in healthy
relationships. In healthy relationships,
though, people stay calm and talk
about how they feel. Talking calmly
helps you see the real reason you are
not getting along. This makes it
easier to figure out how to fix the
problem. In healthy relationships,
working through problems often
makes the relationship stronger.
People feel good about one another
when they work through tough times
rather than give up too easily.

Being in a healthy relationship does not
mean that fights do not happen. Fights can
still occur but the way it is dealt with is
different. In a healthy relationship, people
stay calm and express how they feel. A way
to do this is by talking calmly, this makes it
easier to identify the problem as to why
you may not be getting along with one
another. This then makes it easier to find a
solution to fix the problem. In a healthy
relationship working through the problems
usually makes the relationship stronger.
People may feel good because they have
been able to work through a rough patch
rather than give up easily.

9/7/14 Negotiation and
compromise
In a healthy relationship, negotiation
and compromise are always present.
Negotiation means talking until you
agree with each other. Compromise
means each person gives up a little
Negotiation and compromise are two key
ingredients to having a healthy
relationship. Negotiation means that you
talk to the other person until you come up
with something you agree on. Compromise

bit of what they want until both
persons can agree. For example, say
Jane wants to go to a movie, but Kara
already saw the movie Jane wants to
see. Jane and Kara can negotiate
and compromise until they find
something they both want to do. This
way, its a win-win situation and
everyone is happy.
There may be some issues which are
non-negotiable within your family.
Non-negotiable means they are
rules that will not change. These rules
are likely in place to keep you safe.
(Some of these items may be no
underage drinking or no missing
curfew, for example.)

means that each person gives up a little of
what they want until both sides can agree.
However, when it comes to some things
such as missing curfew, under age drinking
or smoking it may be non-negotiable
within your family. This means that the
rules will not change. These rules are most
likely enforced to protect you.
9/7/14 Be assertive, not
aggressive
Dont be afraid to ask for what you
want, but remember to respect your
partner. Being assertive means
asking for what you want clearly and
respectfully, without threats,
intimidation, or physical force.
Assertive communication means
respecting the rights of others, as well
If there is a mutual respect between your
partner, do not be afraid to ask for what
you want. To be assertive means to clearly
ask for what you want in a respectful
matter without any physical force, threats
or intimidation. It is important to respect
yourself along with the other person.

as your own rights.
9/7/14 Dealing with
conflict (its part
of everyones
lives)
When you were younger, an adult
would often step in if you had a
problem with someone else, like if
someones feelings got hurt or
someone took something from you
without asking. Now that youre
getting older, you need to learn how
to deal with conflict on your own.
Thats because conflict is part of
everyones life it will show up at
school, at work, at home, in your
community, and in relationships.
At a younger age the conflicts we face are
usually about hurting someones feelings or
taking something without asking. Adults
would then usually intervene and help
solve the conflict at hand. When you get
older, it becomes your responsibility to
deal with the conflict on your own because
its part of growing up and everyones life.
These conflicts may come up at work,
home, school, community and in
relationships.

10/7/14 Talk it out For small problems, a simple Im
sorry is often all it takes to feel better
and move on. But not all conflicts are
easily worked out. Some issues are
not clear-cut, like if you and a friend
are not getting along so well and
youre not sure why. Other conflicts
are felt by only you, like if you dont
want to do what the rest of the crowd
is doing, or if you are being bullied.

How to deal with fights with your parents/
guardians
When it comes to small problems that
occur in your everyday, it can be solved by
simply saying Im sorry. However, not all
conflicts can be worked out this easily.
Some of these issues can include being
bullied, not understanding why you and
your friend are not getting along or fights
with your parents.








Avoiding a conflict can sometimes
be good, but sometimes it can
make things worse. In most
cases, when you are angry, its
best to tell the other person what
you are feeling. If you dont talk
about it, your anger will most
likely come out in another way,
like in the tone of your voice or in
your body language. This can
make the problem even worse.
By avoiding conflict or trying to
run from the problem, you might:
Lose a good friend
Be treated unfairly at work or school
Not get something you want or need
Feel like you can never make things
better

Avoiding a conflict may be good and avoid
certain problems but it also has the power
to make issues worse. When youre feeling
angry it s best to control your anger and
talk it out other than expressing it
physically or with a bad tone. This can
blow up the problem even more. By
avoiding the conflict and not wanting to
deal with it may lead to losing a good
friend, be treated unfairly at home, school
or work and you may feel like you are not
getting something you want or need.
10/7/14 Conflict: How do
you react?
Its okay to feel angry, upset,
annoyed, let down, or sad when you
have a problem with somebody else.
These feelings are normal. Still, some
people deal with these feelings in
unhealthy ways. You most likely know
people maybe even some adults
who yell, shout, swear, or call
When you have a problem with someone
else, it is normal to feel emotions such as
being upset, annoyed, let down, angry and
sadness. It is possible to deal with some of
these feelings in unhealthy ways. For
example you may swear, call people names,
yell or shout. This may be a form for the
person to get back at the person. Getting

people names when theyre upset.
Maybe they try to get back at the
person theyre mad at. Or, maybe
they hit others or get into fights.
These types of things make it harder
to work things out. Let yourself feel
your emotions, but dont let them get
out of hand and lead you to do these
things.
physical and hitting the other person
escalates the fight, which will make it
harder to solve in the future. Let these
emotions pass through you but do not let
them get out of hand because of the
consequences.
10/7/14 Dealing with
conflict: take it step
by step
Step 1. Cool off! Being out of
control will keep you from
solving the problem.
Count down backwards from 10.
Close your eyes and take deep
breaths.
Think of a peaceful place or something
that makes you happy.
Slowly say over and over to yourself,
"Take it easy."
Step 2. Keep it real! Figure
out whats really
bothering you.
Do you not agree?
Did someone say or do something that
made you mad or hurt your
feelings?
Are you feeling the way you do now
because of something else that
Step 1: Cool off! Its always better to
stay in control
Count down backwards from 10 or
count to 10.
Take deep breaths with your eyes
closed.
Think of something that makes you
happy. This can be a person, food or
place.
Repeat take it easy over and over
to yourself.
Step 2: Keep it real! Think about whats
really bothering you
Do you not agree with what is going
on?
Did someone do or say something
that hurt your feelings or made you
angry?
Are you feeling like this because of

upset you in the past?
Is this a one-time problem or one that
keeps happening?
Step 3. Deal with the
issue.
Find a time when you can talk in
private.
Keep your voice calm and your body
relaxed. Make eye contact to show
you are serious.
Say exactly what is bothering you.
Share how you feel by using
sentences that start with I. Dont
blame or accuse the other person.
Check out the following examples
and then practice changing "you"
statements to "I"
statements. Instead of: You
never want to hang out with me
anymore. Try: I feel left out
when you hang out with Tracys
friends. Instead of: You
always pick on me in class. Try:
I feel singled out when you call on
me more than other
students. Instead of: Youre
so bossy. Try: I feel upset when
you dont listen to what I think.
Keep the conflict between you and only
something that took place in the
past?
Is this a one time problem or one
that is regular?
Step 3: Deal with the issue
Decide on a time where you can talk
in private.
Keep your body relaxed and voice
calm. Make eye contact to show that
you are listening and are serious.
Say exactly what is bothering you.
To make sure what youre saying
does not come across as accusing or
blaming the other person start with
I.
For example instead of: You prefer
to hang out with other people
instead now. Try: I feel left out
when you hang out with Johns
friends.
Instead of: You always embarrass
me in class by picking on me. Try:
I feel singled out more when you
call on me more than other
students, it bothers me.
Instead of: You always rather hang
out with your boyfriend. Try: I feel
like you do not make as much time
for me.
the others involved. Dont ask
friends to take sides.
Step 4. Listen. The other
person might see the
problem in a different
way. You may each have a
different point of view,
but neither of you is
wrong. Make sure to listen
to his or her side of the
story.
Make eye contact. This shows you are
interested in what the other person
is saying and willing to solve the
problem.
Listen for what is behind the words
like feelings and ideas.
Keep emotions in check. Dont
interrupt, get angry, judge, or be
defensive.
Try putting yourself in the other
persons shoes to see where he or
she is coming from.
Step 5. Work it out. Talk
about ways to settle the
conflict that will meet
both of your needs. Be
willing to change and
keep an open mind. Be
Keep the conflict only between you
and the others involved. Do not
force or ask friends to take sides.
Step 4: Listen. The other person may
have a different perspective. Listen
to their side and explain yours.
Make eye contact. This expresses
that you are interested and listening
to what the other person is saying
and you are willing to solve the
problem at hand.
Listen of what is behind the words,
such as the feelings and ideas that
are inspiring them.
Keep control of your emotions. It is
important not to interrupt, get
angry, be defensive, or to judge.
Be empathetic and try to
understand where the other person
is coming from. Step into their shoes
to see where he/she is coming from.
Step 5: Work it out. Talk about ways
to settle the conflict. Talk about what
both sides need. Keep an open mind.
Be willing to say youre sorry, forgive
and move past it.

willing to say youre sorry,
forgive, and move on.

10/7/14 What if you cant
work it out on your
own?
Parents/guardians, teachers, school
nurses, coaches, counselors, and
other trusted adults can help you deal
with conflicts. Some schools have
mediation programs that help teens
figure out the real issue, talk through
things, and find ways to fix their
problems. Dont be shy about asking
for help.
If the conflict gets out of hand, theyre
always people that you can reach out to.
These people include, parents/guardians,
teachers, school nurses, coaches,
counselors and trusted adults. Some
schools provide programs that help teens
figure out issues and talk through things.
Dont be shy to ask for help; there is
nothing to be embarrassed about.

10/7/14 When to walk
away?
You cant always find a way to solve
a conflict. If the other person doesnt
want to work it out or if the conflict
gets physical give it a rest and
walk away. Keeping safe is always
the smart way to go!

Sometimes it may not be possible to solve a
conflict. This can be the case if the other
person does not want to work it out or if
the conflict gets physical. Give the situation
a rest and walk away. Being safe is the top
priority.

10/7/14 PHYSICAL
FIGHTS: Why is
fighting a
problem?
Violence among young people is a
real crisis in the United States.
According to the Centers for Disease
Control and Prevention , it is the
second leading cause of death for
young people between the ages of 10
and 24. More than one-third of high
school students said they had been in
Physical fighting is an issue that needs to
be taken very seriously. According to the
Centers for disease control and prevention
violence among young people is the second
leading cause of deaths for young people
between the ages of 10 and 24. This is a
very common issue as more than one-third
of high school students said they have

a physical fight. And in 2005, almost
7 percent of high school students said
they brought a gun, knife, or weapon
to school the month before.
Youth violence can include a lot
of behaviors:
Bullying
Hitting or slapping
Punching
Kicking
Robbery, assault, or rape
Bringing a weapon to school
Deaths from fighting between
young people are only part of the
problems of youth violence. Many
young people are hurt in other
ways, some of which can lead to
long-term disabilities, including:
Cuts
Bruises
Broken bones
Gunshot wounds

taken part in a physical fight.

Youth violence can be in the form of many
behaviors such as.
Bullying
Punching
Hitting or slapping
Kicking
Robbery, assault, or rape
Bringing a weapon to school

Apart from death about this age group,
many young people are hurt in other
ways which can lead to long term
disabilities such as:
Cuts
Broken bones
Bruises
Gunshot wounds

10/7/14 Which teens are
more likely to
fight?
There are a lot of things that can
make a teen more likely to fight.
Some things that make a teen more likely
to fight include:
Physical fights in the past

Some of them include:
Physical fights in the past
Drug, alcohol, or tobacco use
Hanging out with kids who get into
trouble
Family problems at home
Poor grades in school
Poverty in the community
Remember, though, that even if one
or more of these things exist, it does
not always mean that a person will
fight.
Drug, alcohol, tobacco use
Family problems going on at home
Low grades in school
Poverty in the community
Hanging out with a bad crowd

However this does not mean a person who
meets one of these points will always fight.
10/7/14 How can I stay
safe?
If violence or fighting happens at your
school or in your neighborhood, there
are a few things you can do to stay
safe from fights.
Choose your friends carefully. Stay
away from others who do not
handle their anger well.
Report any weapons to a trusted
adult. If a classmate brings a
weapon like a gun or a knife to
school, its best to tell a teacher
right away. If youre out after
school with a friend who carries a
weapon, leave right away.
Practice safety in numbers. Stay
Below are a few ways to stay safe from
fights that either happen at your school or
in your neighborhood.

Choose your friends carefully. Avoid
associating yourself with others
who are unable to handle their
anger well.
Report any weapons to a trusted
adult. If you see someone bring in a
weapon such as a knife or gun to
school, tell a teacher or trusted
adult immediately. If you are not on
school grounds and see a friend who
is carrying one, leave right away.
Safety in numbers. Stay close to

close to friends and walk in groups. friends and walk in groups.
10/7/14 FRIENDSHIPS: Friendships can be tough sometimes.
You may be making new friends while
still trying to keep old friends. It can
also be hard to know what to do when
you dont agree with a friend. Keep in
mind, you can have a good friendship
and still fight sometimes.
Friendships can be a tricky area for many
people because its hard to make new
friends while keeping the same old friends.
It can also be hard when you get into
conflicts with friends. Healthy friendships
still fight sometimes.

10/7/14 Peer pressure There are two kinds of peer pressure:
positive peer pressure and negative
peer pressure. Peer pressure is when
you try something because everyone
else is doing it.
Positive peer pressure is when you
act a certain way because your
friends are acting that way, but it is
for a good reason. For example, if
your friends talk you into joining the
soccer team, and you end up really
liking soccer, thats positive peer
pressure. Or, if your friend volunteers
to tutor younger kids, and you decide
you would like to do the same, thats
another example of positive peer
pressure.
Negative peer pressure is when you
feel you have to act a certain way
Peer pressure can be split up into two
categories, positive and negative. Peer
pressure is the term when you try
something because everyone else is doing
it.

Positive peer pressure is when you act a
particular way because your friends or
people around you are acting that way.
However its for a good reason and they
must have good intentions. For example, if
your friends talk you into joining the
basketball team and you end up enjoying
the sport. That is positive peer pressure
because it has ended up enhancing your
life. Another example would be if your
friends volunteer to go help out at an
orphanage.

Negative peer pressure on the other hand
is when you feel like you are pressured to

because everyone else is, but the
end result is bad. If your friends are
mean to the new girl at school and so
you treat her badly, too, then that is
an example of negative peer
pressure.
So why do some girls follow their
friends, even when its not a good
idea? Girls may worry about what
their friends will think, not know how
to say no, or fear being left out. Some
friends may pressure you to do
something because "everyone else
does it," such as making fun of
someone, using alcohol or drugs, or
smoking. The best thing to do is say,
No, thanks or I dont want to. Keep
in mind, you are always in charge of
what you do and dont do. It can help
to talk with your parents or guardians
about how to handle pressures that
may come up.
act a certain way because everyone else is
but the end result is bad. An example of
this is treating someone badly just because
everyone else is, such as a new kid.

It is easy to fall into this peer pressure even
though you know it is not a good idea. This
is because you may worry that your friends
will think and you have the fear of being
left out. Negative peer pressure can involve
alcohol, smoking, or even drugs. The best
way to avoid this peer pressure is to say I
dont want to. Or No, thanks. Remember
you are always in charge of your choices
and want you want to do and avoid. It may
help to talk to your parents about how to
handle peer pressure while growing up.
10/7/14 Popularity There are lots of things that you and
your friends may do to fit in. It may be
having the right clothes or being
friends with the cool kids. It is normal
to want to be liked by others, but it is
more important to focus on what
There are several things you and your
friends do to fit in. It can go from having
the right clothes and latest accessories to
being friends with the cool kids. It is
normal to want to be liked by the majority
of others. Though, it is more important to

matters to YOU. Having lots of friends
and dressing like everyone else may
seem important right now, but try to
focus on being yourself and having
real friends who care about you.

Here are 7 ways to know if your
friends really care about you:
They want you to be happy.
They listen and care about what you
have to say.
They are happy for you when you do
well.
They say they are sorry when they
make a mistake.
They dont expect you to be perfect.
They give you advice in a caring way.
They keep personal things between
the two of you.
what matters to you personally. Having a
lot of friends and fitting in can be
something that is important temporarily
but it is better to focus on being you and
finding true friends who will be there for
you.

Here are 7 ways to know if you found
yourself true friends:
They want you to be happy and do
well.
They listen and care about what you
say.
There are happy for you when you
do accomplish something.
They apologize after making a
mistake.
They do not expect you to be
perfect.
They share personal advice to you
to build a strong relationship.
10/7/14 Cliques A clique is a small group of friends
that is very picky about who can and
cannot join the group. While its nice
to have a close group of friends,
being on the outside of a clique may
not be fun! Girls in cliques often leave
out other girls on purpose. They may
bully girls who are not cool enough.
A clique is a group of friends who are very
selective about who can and cannot join
their group. It may be nice to be in a close
group of friends but not being involved in a
clique you like may not be fun. Girls in
cliques often leave other girls out on
purpose along with bullying girls who are
not cool enough or reach their standard. If

If you are being picked on, try to
make friends with new people who
care about YOU. Keep in mind, it is
the quality or value of the friendship
that counts, not how many friends
you have. And, if you are leaving
someone else out, think about how
you would feel if you were the one
being left out. If you are having a hard
time with moving, read about dealing
with The Moving Blues .
There can be a lot of peer pressure in
cliques. You may feel like you need to
do things like drink or do drugs to be
part of the gang. Keep in mind, you
always have the right to say no! Real
friends will respect that. You also
have the right to make new friends.
this is happening to you, try to make
friends with people who genuinely care
about you. It is more important to have
good friends than many friends who do
now care. This is another time where
quality is more important than quantity. If
you are the one in the clique leaving other
people out, try putting yourself in their
shoes and think about the feelings theyre
experiencing because of it.

There is also usually a high level of peer
pressure among these cliques. You may feel
like you need to do things such as drugs
and drink to keep your sport in the gang.
Remember you always have the right to say
no to something you do not believe in. If
they are your real friends they will respect
and support your decisions and judgments.
You also have the right to leave people who
do not make you happy and go make new
friends that will appreciate you and make
you feel loved.
11/7/14 Bullying Friendships are very important to
young women, especially when it
comes to having a group of people to
hang out with. Sometimes girls
compete with each other for friends.
When this happens, some girls may
Friendships are very important to teens
especially when theyre the group of people
you will be hanging out with. It is normal
for teens to compete with each other for
friends. When this takes place it may lead
to leaving each other out or bullying them

leave others out of a circle of friends
or even bully them in more open
ways. Being left out of a group can
really hurt someones feelings, so
think about how what you do makes
other people feel. You would want
others to include you and treat you
nicely. If you are the one being left
out, scroll down to Ten Ways to
Make New Friends for some helpful
tips. Also, check out our Bullying
section to learn more about when
girls bully.

in open ways. Being left out of a group can
really hurt someones feelings so be
considerate on how you treat your friends.
You would also want to be included and
not constantly lef out.
211/7/1
4
Making new friends
It can be really tough when you are
meeting a whole bunch of new people
at once if you are new at school. You
may feel shy or embarrassed. You
If you are moving to a new school it may be
really touch when you meet a bunch of new
people at once. You might feel shy or
embarrassed along with not having
anything to say. The other person most
likely feels the same way. Be strong and
talk to new people. It will help to make new
genuine friends if you are yourself!



How to make new friends:
Decide whom you want to be

may feel like you dont have anything
to say. But, the other person likely
feels the same way. Half the battle is
feeling strong enough to talk to new
people. And, it will help to just be you!
Decide whom you want to be friends
with and why you like these
people.
Take part in after-school activities such
as sports, clubs, or other activities
that interest you.
Introduce yourself and repeat the name
of the person youre meeting (this
will help you remember his or her
name).
Work on your listening skills and think
before you talk.
Be sensitive to other people.
When people say nice things about
you, say thank you without being
cocky. Say nice things to others.
Take your time making friends.
Be willing to risk having someone say
nosome people may not be open
to making new friends. But its
important to try anyway!
Be positive and upbeat.
Throw parties to spend time
friends with and why you like
these people.
Take part in an after school
activity. This can be joining
clubs or even sport teams.
Introduce yourself and repeat
the other persons name. This
will make it easier to remember
them.
Think before you say anything
and work on your listening
skills.
Be sensitive to other people.
When people compliment you
or say nice things, dont be
cocky, say thank you. Say
nice things to others.
Take your time making friends
Be willing to hear someone say
no. Some people may not be
as open to making new friends.
Its important to try anyway and
not close yourself off.
Be positive and upbeat.
Arrange hangouts to spend
time with old and new friends.

with new and old friends.
11/7/14 Tips for handling a
fight with a friend
In a healthy friendship, you should not
be afraid of losing a friend because
you say "no." Good friends should
respect your right to say no and
not give you a hard time. You
should show your friends the same
respect when they say no to you.
If you and your friend fight about
something, it does not mean that
you have an unhealthy
relationship. You will not always
agree with what your friend has to
say. But you should always
respect one anothers ideas. As
long as you and your friend listen
to what the other has to say, you
should be able to work through a
fight.
The relationships you have will help
you learn a lot about yourself. You
will learn about the kind of friends you
want to have and the kind of friend
you want to be.
In a healthy friendship you should
not be scared of losing a friend
because of not agreeing with them
and saying no. Good friends
should respect your opinions and
values and should not give you a
hard time if you do. You should
show the same mutual respect to
your friend if they say no to you.


11/7/14 Helping a friend in
need
Are you worried about a friend who
isnt eating? A friend who is smoking
or drinking? Or maybe a friend who is
If you have a friend who smokes, drinks,
has problems at home or isnt eating, you
can listen and give advice but it may be

having trouble at home? You can
listen and give advice, but your
friends problems may be more than
you can handle alone. Dont be afraid
to tell a trusted adult, such as a
parent/guardian, teacher, or school
nurse. Even though your friend may
get mad at you for telling an adult, it
is the only way to protect your friends
health.
necessary to get a trusted adult to help
because it is a lot to handle alone. Dont be
afraid to reach out for help. It can be a
parent/guardian, teacher or even a school
nurse. If this is a way to protect your
friends health, do not worry about them
getting mad at you. It will be better for
them in the long term.
11/7/14 Ending a friendship Sadly, not all friendships last a
lifetime. Sometimes friends grow
apart, and sometimes you might need
to end a friendship. So how do you
know when you should end a
friendship?
You should end a friendship if your
friend:
Is sarcastic or mean to you often
Tells your secrets
Goes after your crush (or significant
other) again and again
Doesnt want you to have other friends
Doesnt listen to you
Pushes you to do dangerous things
Blames you for what's not good in their
Not all friendships last a lifetime. As you
grow up, you grow apart from people and
that is normal. At times it may be necessary
to end a friendship.
You should end a friendship if your friend:
Makes sarcastic or mean comments.
Shares your secrets.
Constantly goes after your crush or
significant other.
Doesnt want you to be friends with
other people.
Doesnt make an effort to listen to
you.
Pushes you to do dangerous things
that you dont want to talk part in.
Blames you for things that are going
wrong in their lives.
Complains all the time and brings

lives
Complains all the time

You could just stop taking your
friends phone calls and stop talking
to her at school, but thats not always
the best way to end a friendship. The
other person may be confused and
not understand why youre acting
different. A direct talk with the other
person may be better. You could try
saying, I feel that you dont listen to
me, and friends should support each
other. (Visit the Learning to say I
instead of you section of this web
site for more tips!) Remember:
honesty is often the best policy!

you down.


You can shut your friends off by not picking
up their calls, avoiding them at school and
not initiating hangouts but thats not
always the best way. This may leave the
other person leaving confused and not
understand why youre acting different.
Having a direct talk with the other person
may be a lot better. You can try explaining
and justifying your decision but remember,
honesty is the best policy!

11/7/14 If your parents
dont like your
friends
It can be common for
parents/guardians and teens to run
into conflict about friendships.
Parents/guardians sometimes worry
that their teen is hanging out with the
wrong crowd.
It can be common for parents/guardians
and teens to face disagreements about
certain friendships. Parents/guardians
usually worry that their teen are
associating themselves with the wrong
crowd.

11/7/14 What are some Parents/guardians may be concerned Parents/guardians can be concerned about
reasons
parents/guardians
give for not liking
their teen friends?
about things like drugs, alcohol, sex,
skipping school, missing curfew, body
piercings, or tattoos. Some
parents/guardians may think body
piercings and tattoos are signs of
other behaviors, like drinking or
smoking.

things like alcohol, drugs, skipping school,
sex, missing curfew, piercings or tattoos.
Some parents/guardians take body
piercings and tattoos a sign of other
behaviors like drinking or smoking.


What can a teen do
if their
parents/guardians
dont like their
friends?
It depends on the type of relationship
the teen has with her
parents/guardians.
Some parents/guardians and teens
can talk to each other and work
through problems. Both parties trust
each other and they know that they
can work through things. In this case,
the teen can sit down and talk with
her parents/guardians and try to work
things out.
Sometimes, the relationship is
already strained. In this case, it can
be helpful to bring in an outside
person to help resolve things or
mediate. This could be a school
counselor, school social worker,
How to handle a situation like this really
depends on the relationship you have with
your parents/guardians.
Some parents/guardians are able to talk to
each other and work through problems
together. Both sides trust each other
enough to be open allowing problems to be
solved by talking through things.

If the relationship is already strained and
tension filled, it may be helpful to bring in
an outside person to help solve things or
mediate This person can be a school social
worker, family doctor, therapist, mentor,
family member, coach or counselor.

clergy member, family doctor,
therapist, mentor, coach, or favorite
aunt.
11/7/14 How can my
friends get along
better with my
parents?
If you want your parents to like your
friends, it might help for them to get to
know one another. Encourage your
friends to say Hello, how are you? to
your parents when they come over.
Arrange for your friends to eat dinner
at your house so that your parents
and friends can talk. Even if your best
friend looks scary on the outside
perhaps she has facial piercings?
if your parents and your friend talk,
your parents may discover shes an
interesting and creative person.
Set a good example when you meet
your friends parents by looking the
adults in the eye and speaking
politely.

If you want your parents to warm up to
your friends and like them it may help for
them to get to know one another on a
personal level. Encourage your friends to
ask how they are when they come over.
You can even arrange your friends to eat
dinner at your house so your friends and
parents can bond while sitting at the dining
table. This will stop your parents from
judging your friends quickly by what they
see or hear.

To set a good example when you meet your
friends parents, look them in the eye and
speak politely.

What if my parents
forbid me from
seeing my friends?
Your parents may be trying to protect
you. They are probably trying to keep
you safe. While it may be hard to
understand, remember that your
Your parents could possibly be trying to
protect you. Their intention is probably to
keep you safe. It may be hard to
understand but remember that your

parents have many years of
experience and can see things
differently from you. Try talking to
your parents about their concerns.
They may not change their minds, but
being honest with one another is the
best option.

parents have a different perspective based
on all the things they have experienced in
their past years. You can try talking to your
parents about their concerns. It is not
guaranteed to make them change their
mind but being honest is the best option.
11/714 Dating Dating relationships can be a fun and
exciting part of your life. They can
also be confusing, especially if dating
is new to you. Once you know that
the person that you like also likes
you, you may not know what to do
next. You can start by learning about
what makes a dating relationship
healthy and safe.

Dating relationships can be both a fun and
exciting part of your life if theyre healthy
relationships. Relationships can also be
confusing especially if its something new
to you. Once you know the other person
likes you and you like them, you may not
know what do to next. Knowing what
makes a relationship healthy and safe can
help.

11/7/14 When do teens
start dating?
There is no best age for teens to start
dating. Every person will be ready for
a dating relationship at a different
time. Different families may have their
own rules about dating, too. When
you decide to start a dating
relationship, it should be because you
There is no best age for teens to start
dating. The age that a person decides to
start dating varies. Different families also
have different views and rules on dating as
well. When you start dating someone it
should be because you care about them,
not because everyone else is in a

care about someone and not because
other people are dating. A dating
relationship is a special chance to get
to know someone, and it should
happen only when you are really
ready and your parents/guardians are
okay with it.
relationship and youre pressured to be
dating someone. A dating relationship is an
opportunity to really get to know someone.
It should happen when youre personally
ready and your parents/guardians approve
of it.
What is a healthy
dating
relationship?
Healthy dating relationships should
start with the same things that healthy
friendships start with: good
communication, honesty, and
respect. Dating relationships are a
little different because they may
include physical ways of showing you
care, like hugging, kissing, or holding
hands. You may find yourself wanting
to spend all of your time with your
crush, but it is important to spend
some time apart, too. This will let you
have a healthy relationship with your
crush and with your friends and family
at the same time.
Healthy dating relationships should start
with the same things that healthy
friendships start with: these things include
good communication, honesty and a
mutual respect. Dating relationships are
different to friendships because it includes
physical ways of showing you care. This
can be shown through holding hands,
hugging or kissing. You may want to spend
all your time with your crush but it is
important to spend time apart and balance
things out in your life. This will help to
maintain a healthy relationship with your
friends, family and crush all at the same
time.

12/7/14 Why should I date
someone close to
my age?
It may not seem like a big deal to
date someone more than 2 years
older than you, but it can be. Its
possible that someone older than you
might want a more physical
Although a difference of two years does not
seem like a big deal, it can be. This is
because there is a higher possibility that
someone older may want more of a
physical relationship than you do or are

relationship than you do. ready for.
12/7/14 What if I feel
pressure to do
something I do not
want to do?
Respecting your right to say no
means that your date will stop if you
say no.
You should NEVER feel pressured to
do something that you don't want to
do. Your crush should always respect
your right to say no to anything that
doesnt feel right. Talk to your crush
ahead of time about what you will and
will not do. Learn why no sex is the
safest sex in our Body section.
Mutual respect means that no means no
and that your date will stop.
You should never be pressured into doing
something that you dont want to do. Your
crush should always respect your choices
along with your right to say no to anything
that makes you uncomfortable. It may be
easier to talk to your crush in advance
about how comfortable you are about
doing certain things.

13/7/14 Tips for having
healthy and safe
relationships
Get to know a person by talking on the
phone or at school before you go
out for the first time.
Go out with a group of friends to a
public place the first few times you
go out.
Plan fun activities like going to the
movies or the mall, on a picnic or
for a walk.
Tell the other person what you feel
okay doing. Also, tell the person
what time your parents/guardians
want you to be home.
Tell at least one friend and your
Get to know the person before going
out the first time. This can be at
school or on the phone.
Go out with a group of friends to a
public place for the first couple of
times you go out to stay on the safe
side.
Plan fun activities that will keep you
excited! Some suggestions are going
on a picnic, a walk, movie or mall.
Tell the other person your limits.
Also, tell them what time your
parents/guardians want you to be
home.

parents/guardians who you are
going out with and where you are
going. Also tell them how to reach
you.
Communication, trust, and respect
are key to healthy relationships.
Healthy relationships make you feel
good about who YOU are and SAFE
with the other person. Feel good
about yourself and get to know what
makes you happy. The more you love
yourself, the easier it will be to find
healthy relationships.

Tell at least one of your friends
along with your parents/guardians
who you are going out with and the
location. Also give them a way to
contact you in case of anything.
The key elements to having a healthy
relationship include trust, respect and
communication. Healthy relationships
allow you to feel safe with the other person
and feel good about yourself. You can learn
about what makes you happy. Keep in mind
that the more you love yourself, the easier
it will be to find healthy relationships.
14/7/14 Sexual orientation During your teen years, your sexual
feelings will develop. These sexual
feelings are part of the body and of
the mind. It is normal and natural to
have sexual feelings, even though
you may feel embarrassed by them
sometimes. Many teens feel confused
by their new sexual feelings. If you
feel that way, you are not alone.
The term sexual orientation means
the kind of person to whom you are
romantically and physically drawn to.
During your teen years, sexual feelings will
start to develop. These feelings are both
part of the body and mind. You dont need
to feel embarrassed by having these
feelings; its normal and natural. Its okay
to feel confused by these new feelings, you
are not alone.







There are three main kinds of sexual
orientation:
Heterosexual. People who are
heterosexual are attracted to
members of the opposite sex.
Heterosexual boys are attracted to
girls, and heterosexual girls are
attracted to boys. Heterosexuals
are sometimes called "straight."
Homosexual. People who are
homosexual are attracted to
people of the same sex. Girls who
are attracted to other girls are
lesbian; boys who are attracted to
other boys are often known as gay.
(The term gay is sometimes also
used to describe homosexual
individuals of either gender.)
Bisexual. People who are bisexual
are romantically and physically
attracted to members of both sexes.
Sexual orientation means the kind of
person who you are drawn to both
romantically and physically. There are
three main types of sexual orientation:
Heterosexual- People who are attracted to
members of the opposite sex. Boys are
attracted to girls and girls are attracted to
boys. Heterosexuals are often called
straight.
Homosexual-People who are homosexual
are attracted to people of the same sex.
This means that girls are attracted to girls,
and are called lesbian. Boys who are
attracted to other boys are often known as
gay. The term gay can be used to describe
homosexual individuals of both genders.
Bisexual-People who are bisexual are
romantically and physically attracted to
people of both sexes.
16/7/14 Family
relationships
The first place you learn about
building relationships is through your
family. Whether you live with your
mom, dad, grandparents, brothers,
sisters, aunts, uncles, or whomever,
your family should be a source of love
Your family can really help you learn about
building relationships. It doesnt matter if
you live with your mom, dad, grandparents,
brothers, sisters, uncles, aunts, or whoever
is your caretaker, your family should be a
main source of love and comfort. This

and comfort for you. That doesnt
mean there wont be conflict, though!
Remember: relationships take time
and energy to make them healthy.
This section will help you learn more
about different kinds of relationships
within a family.
doesnt mean that theyll be no conflict, but
you should be able to work past it.
Remember that healthy relationships
require a lot of time, effort and energy.
16/7/14 Parents, step-
parents,
grandparents,
guardians
Your relationship with your
parents/guardians may be confusing
right now. As you get older, you can
do more things on your own. You also
have more freedom to spend time
with other people, like friends or
crushes. You may feel you are ready
to choose where you go and what
you do. But, you need to follow your
parents'/guardians' rules. They make
rules because they care about you
and want you to be safe. Their rules
may make you angry, though, and
you may find that youre fighting with
your parents/guardians more than
you used to.
Your relationship with your
parents/guardians may be confusing right
now. When you grow up, you will be given
more freedom to do more things on your
own. This means that youll most likely be
able to spend time with other people like
yours friends or crushes. Although you may
feel like youre ready to make your own
decisions and that you deserve to do as you
please, you need to follow the rules your
parents/guardians have set. These rules
are made because they care about you and
because your safety is a priority. These
rules may make you angry and frustrated
which can lead to more fights.

16/7/14 How to deal with
fights with your
parents/guardians
Talk about the rules. Talk about things
ahead of time so that you will be
able to tell what they will say yes
or no to before you make plans.
Talk about the rules: Talk about
things in advance. This will help you
have a clearer idea of what they will
say yes or no to before you confirm

Ask your parents/guardians to tell
you the reason for each rule. Ask if
you can tell them how the rules
make you feel. See if they will
listen to your ideas about what the
rules should be. They may be
willing to use your ideas when
making rules.
Try to stay calm. Dont yell or stomp
your feet when your
parents/guardians say no. If you
listen to what they say, you will
show them that you are growing
up.
Follow the rules. If your
parents/guardians tell you to be
home at a certain time, be home at
that time. If you are going to be
late, call and tell them so they
dont worry about you. If you follow
the rules, they may let you come
home later in the future.
Pick your battles. Cleaning your room
is no fun, but its most likely not
worth fighting about. Everyone has
to do it!
Spend time with your family. Some
teens fight with their
parents/guardians over how much
time they spend with their friends.
or make plans. Ask your parents to
justify and give reasons for each
rule. This will help you understand
where your parents are coming
from and their perspective.
Hopefully they will listen to your
ideas and contributions to what you
think the rules should be too. They
may even be willing to use your
ideas while coming up with these
rules.
Try to stay calm: Dont yell, stomp
or cause a scene when youre
parents/guardians say no. If you
listen to what they have to say and
accept it, you will be able to show
them that you are growing up.
Follow the rules: If your
parents/guardians tell you to be
home at a certain time, make sure
youre home. If something comes up
and youre going to be late, call them
otherwise theyll worry about you. If
you follow the rules and prove that
you are responsible they may let
you come home later in the future.
Pick your battles: When it comes
to small things that can avoid fights,
you should do it! This can be things
Talk it over and make some special
family time. There are lots of things
your family can do together, like
going on a hike or bike ride, or going
to the beach.
like cleaning your room or putting
your phone away at dinner.
Spend time with your family:
Some teens fight with their
parents/guardians because of how
much time they spend with their
friends. Prioritize your family and
make some special time for them.
You can do activities like going to
the beach, a bike ride, bowling or
even a picnic.
17/7/14 Young caregivers There are over one million young
people in the United States who take
care of someone in their family. So, if
you are taking care of someone in
your family, you are not alone! You
might need to watch your brothers or
sisters so your parents or guardians
can work. Or you might take care of a
family member with an illness or
disability.
Caring for someone else can be
tough for an adult. It can be even
tougher for a young person. You may
have less time for schoolwork or you
may feel like you dont have any time
to just be a kid. Your friends may not
understand what youre going
If you are responsible for taking care of
someone in your family, you are not alone!
There are over one million young people in
the United States who have the
responsibility to take care of someone in
their family. For example, if your
parents/guardians arent

As an adult, having to take care of someone
else can already be tough, it can be even
harder for a young person. This is because
you may have less time for school related
activities or you may feel like you dont
have the freedom to be a kid and do what a
lot of other teens are doing around you.
Your peers may not have to look after
anyone else making it harder for them to
understand what youre going through.

through. Sometimes it feels good to
take care of someone else and
sometimes you may feel sad or
worried. These feelings are normal.
You need to take care of yourself,
too.
If you are angry, sad, or worried, talk to
a trusted adult, like your school
counselor.
Write in your diary or draw a picture
about how youre feeling.
Make some time each day for fun.
Keep in mind, its okay to say no
sometimes and its okay to want
things for yourself.
Ask for help. Is there someone in
your family, a family friend, or a
neighbor who can help you?
Taking care of someone else can help you
feel both good and sad or worried.
Remember that you need to take care of
yourself too.

If you are angry, sad, or worried,
talk to a trusted adult. For example
your school counselor.
Write in your diary about how
youre feeling or if youre a visual
person, draw you feelings.
Keep some time each day to have
fun and give yourself a break.
Remember that its okay to say no
and sometimes you should let
yourself be prioritized.
Ask for help. Is there someone in
your family, a friend or even a
neighbor that can help you at
certain times?
18/7/14 Dealing with
divorce and
separation
If your parents are recently separated or
divorced, you are probably dealing with a
lot of changes in your family life. Things
may feel like theyre changing even if it
has been a while since your parents
separated or divorced, or if their
separation of divorce came as a
surprise. You may be living full-time with
one parent, or you may be going back
After having your parents separate or get
divorced, you will probably have to deal
with a lot of changes in your family life.
Things may feel like theyre still changing
even if it has been a while since your
parents have been separated or divorced.
The separation of divorce also couldve
come as a surprise. Some situations could
be that youre living full-time with either
http://www.youngw
omenshealth.org/div
orce.html
and forth between both of your parent's
homes. You may be living with a parent
and your parent's new partner and also
dealing with stepbrothers and sisters or
new half-brothers and sisters. You may
even be living with your grandparents.

Whatever your situation is, it's normal to
have many different feelings and
emotions about all of these changes.
Dealing with divorce or separation can be
really hard to get used to, and as you get
older, your feelings may change: some
things may get easier and some things
more complicated. This guide was
written to answer the most common
questions teens have about coping with
divorce and separation.

Ever since my parents told me
they're getting divorced, I've
been feeling upset all the time. Is
this normal?
If your parents are separated, in the
process of getting divorced, or
recently divorced, it is normal for
you to have many complicated
feelings. Even if your parents were
divorced a while ago, it is still
your mother or father, you may be
switching between either of your parents
homes. You can also be living with a parent
and your parents new partner. This means
that you will be introduced to having
stepbrothers and sisters or half-brothers
and sisters. Another scenario could be that
you are living with your grandparents.

No matter what situation you are in, it is
completely normal and acceptable to have
different emotions and feelings about the
changes occurring. Dealing with your
parents divorce can be really hard to get
used and it may take a long time to adapt.
As you grow up and get older, your feelings
may change: some things can get more
complicated while other things are easier
to deal with.

Is it normal to feel upset all the time after
your parents told you that theyre getting
divorced?

If your parents are separated, in the
process of getting a divorce or recently
divorced, it is normal to have many
confusing and complicated feelings. Even if
your parents have been divorced for a
normal to have strong feelings
about it. Some common feelings or
emotions are:
Shock or surprise
Anxiety - you may worry about
what is going to happen to
you and who will take care of
you and your siblings
Sadness and a feeling of loss
Anger - you may be angry at your
parents or you may feel
angry in general
Fear - if one of your parents
leaves, you may be afraid of
losing your other parent
Guilt - you may feel like it's your
fault that your parents split
up
Loneliness - you may feel that
you have no one to talk to or
that no one understands
what you are going through
Worry - you may worry about
whether you will have a good
relationship or marriage in
the future
Embarrassed you may not want
anyone to know that things
are going to be different in
your family
while it is still completely normal to have
strong feelings about it. A lot of common
emotions are:
Anxiety-Worrying about what is
going to happen and who will take
care of you and/or your siblings.
Surprised or shocked.
Anger-you can be angry at your
parents or just angry as a way of
letting things out.
Sadness-you may feel like youve
lost something.
Guilt-You may question if you were
the reason for your parents divorce.
Fear-if one of your parents leaves,
you may be afraid and doubt that
your other parent will as well. You
can also be scared about how things
will work out in the end.
Worry-You may worry and question
if the same thing will happen to you
in the future.
Loneliness-You may feel like you
have nobody to talk to or nobody
understands what youre currently
going through.
Embarrassed-You may not want to
talk to anyone about what is going
on because you dont want them to
You may also feel:
Relieved because there is less
stress at home

Happy to have special time alone
with each parent


All of these feelings are a normal
part of coping with all of the
changes in your family life. If these
feelings are making you feel
overwhelmed and upset, it would be
best for you to talk with your
parents, a trusted adult, or a friend.
Holding your feelings in will not
make them go away! Many teens
who are going through a family
divorce find it helpful to talk with a
counselor or therapist too.

I'm relieved that my parents got
divorced. Is this normal?
Sometimes when parents get
divorced they do so after a lot of
arguing or fighting, or sometimes
your parents may have appeared to
not be speaking to each other at all.
In some families there may even
know how different things will be in
your family.
You can also feel:
Happy to have special time alone
with each parent that you can
cherish without so much chaos.
Relieved because there is less
stress at home and it is easier to
be in a happy environment.

All of these feelings are a normal part of
coping with the major changes in our
family life. It would be best to talk to your
parents, a trusted adult like your aunt or
uncle or a close friend if youre feeling
overwhelmed and upset. Remember that
holding in your feelings will not make them
disappear. It may also help to talk to a
therapist or counselor who will listen and
give you suggestions on how to deal with it
in a healthy way.

Its normal to feel relieved after your
parents get a divorce.
A lot of the times, parents get divorced
because of a lot of arguing, fighting or not
talking at all. This builds a tension filled
environment. This worsens if there has
been any form of physical violence or even
have been physical violence,
alcohol problems, or other situations
that created stress in the home.
After the divorce or separation, it is
normal to feel relieved that your
home life has become less stressful
and more stable. This is nothing to
feel guilty about! Your parents may
also feel relieved even though they
may also feel badly about not being
together.

Since my parents got divorced,
nothing in my life is the same.
Will it always be this hard?
After a divorce, your everyday life
can feel confusing. It may not seem
like it now, but dealing with all of
the changes will get easier with
time. The many changes that come
with divorce are hard to accept all at
once. You will need time to think
about things and adjust to changes
as they come about, and figure out
what works best for you and each of
your parents in your new lives
together. It can help to have
someone to talk to about what
you're going through. It's especially
drinking problems. After the divorce or
separation, you will probably feel relieved
because your home has become less
stressful and more stable and safe. This
means that you should definitely not feel
guilty for feeling this way! Your parents
may feel relieved also because a lot of bad
energy has been cut out from their lives.
However they may also feel badly about
not being together.


If you feel like nothing in your life is the
same after your parents got a divorce,
things will get better with time.
After a divorce, your everyday life can be
very confusing because all of the changes. It
may not seem like it but dealing with all the
changes will get easier with more time. The
many changes that come with the divorce
may be extremely overwhelming and hard
to accept at once. You should take as much
time as you need to think and adjust to
changes as you face them. Find out what
works best for you and each of your
parents. Having someone you trust that
you can talk to can make things a lot easier.


important that you understand that it
is NOT your fault that your parents
are getting separated or
divorced.. Here are some of the
ways divorce might change your
life:
Custody arrangements and
visitations - you may only be
able to see or stay with your
parents on certain days that
were decided by your
parents a mediator, a lawyer
and/or the court
Your parents may be sad,
preoccupied or upset for a
while after the divorce
You probably won't see one of
your parents as much as you
did before the divorce
You may have trouble
concentrating in school
You may have to move and you
may have to change schools
You may have a different
relationship with your
grandparents, aunts and
uncles, cousins, or other
family members as they too
get used to the changes
One or both of your parents may
Its always important to remember and
understand that it is not your fault that
your parents are getting separated or
divorced.
Below are some ways that the divorce may
change your life:

Custody arrangements and visits-
you may be allowed to stay with
only one parent or different parents
on certain days. Your parents a
mediator, a lawyer and/or the court
would decide this.
There is a high chance that you
wont see one of your parents as
much as you did before the divorce.
Your parents may be preoccupied,
sad, upset, or hurt for a while after
the divorce. They may close
themselves off.
You may have to move or change
schools depending how your
parents decide to deal with the
divorce. They may decide to move
away to a different place.
Concentrating may become more
difficult in school because of all the
thoughts in your head.
You may have a different
be dating
Your family finances may be
strained
These changes can be a lot to
deal with at first, but it will get
easier over time if you talk
with your parents about how
the changes are affecting you.






My parents don't get along, and I
always feel like I'm in the middle.
How can I tell them what would
make this situation easier on me?
There are many things parents can
do to try to make life easier after a
divorce. You may want to share the
following tips with your parents:
It's best if both parents stay
involved with you and
reassure you that they will
always love and care for
you. If one of your parents
moves away or does not stay
in touch, it is not your fault.
relationship with your aunts, uncles,
grandparents, cousins or any other
family member as they have to
adjust to the change too.
One or both of your parents may
move on and start dating another
person.
Money may become an issue if your
family finances are strained.
These changes are a lot to handle but will
get easier over time. It helps to talk to your
parents about how the changes are
affecting you and you can work through
them together.

Do you ever feel like youre in the middle
when your parents do not get along? Here
are some things you can tell them to make
the situation easier for you.

The best thing is for both of your
parents to reassure you that they
love and care about you. Know
that if one of your parents moves
away or decides not to stay in touch,
it is not your fault and you should
not put it on yourself.


It's important for parents to try
not to put you in the
middle. Sometimes your
parents may be tempted to
complain about each other or
have you deliver messages
back and forth. This may
make you feel like you have
to choose between your
parents or that you are not
being loyal enough to one of
your parents. If this is
happening, it's okay to tell a
parent that their behavior
upsets you.
It's important for your parents
to try to get along,
especially about things that
directly affect you, like visits,
school issues, holidays and
other things that need to be
discussed.
It's best for you to have as few
changes as possible, at
least for a while. Sometimes
it may be necessary to move
and/or to go to a new school.
You may be unhappy about
these familiar things
changing too! If this has to
It is important for your parents to
be mature and not put you in the
middle. Sometimes your parents
may ask you to send messages back
and forth or complain about the
other. This may add pressure on you
to feel like you have to choose
between your parents or give you
the feeling of guilt because you dont
feel loyal to one parent. If this takes
place, it is completely acceptable
and okay to tell a parent that their
behavior is upsetting you.
It is important that your parents
both put in effort to get along for
special occasions. These occasions
can be things that directly affect
you. This includes, school issues or
holidays. These topics should be
discussed beforehand.
Its best for you to have a few
changes as possible for the
beginning time period at least.
After a divorce, it may be necessary
for you to move out and change
schools. It is okay to feel unhappy
about these things changing. If this
change has to take place, talk to
your parents and tell them that you
happen, tell your parents that
you would like to be able to
stay in touch with your
friends from your old
neighborhood and school.
Even if your parents try their best to
make things easier for you, they
may not be able to do all of these
things all of the time. Remember
that your parents are also trying to
deal with the changes in their
marriage as well as in your family
life. They may not always be as
tuned in to your needs as they were
before. Learning how to express
your feelings to your parents will
really help to let them know what's
important to you.


My parents got divorced
when I was little. Shouldn't
I have gotten over it by
now?
If your parents got divorced
when you were younger, you
may have gotten used to some
of the changes more easily,
would still like to be able to keep in
contact with friends from your old
school and community.

Your parents would most likely try their
best to make things as easy as possible for
you. However they may not be able to do
this all the time. Keep in mind that your
parents are also trying to deal with the
sudden changes in their family and married
life. They may not prioritize your needs as
much as before but being able to express
your feelings to your parents will really
help to show them what is important to
you.





If your parents got divorced when you
were little it can still have some affects on
you. You may have gotten used to some of
the changes more easily and you have
accepted the fact that your parents are not
together and you are comfortable with that.
Also, it is okay to still have many strong
feelings about the divorce even though
people think and expect you to have gotten
and in some ways feel
comfortable with your parents
not being together. However,
you may still have many strong
feelings about the divorce,
even though other people think
you have gotten over it. This is
normal, because as you have
grown older, you may be more
aware of how the divorce
shaped your family. You may
have questions for your parents
and ask for more age-
appropriate explanations. Also,
as you get older, the visitation
and vacation arrangements
may no longer work because of
your social or school activities.
It's important to talk to your
parents when you think it is
time to change your
arrangements, and try to work
with them to figure out a new
schedule that fits your life and
theirs.

What are some ways I can
deal with stress?
over it. This is normal because as you grow
older you can become more aware about
how the divorce has shaped your family
and your life in the present. You may even
want to ask your parents more questions
for appropriate explanations for your age.
It is important to talk to your parents when
you think its an appropriate time to
change your arrangements due to social or
school activities. See if you can work
together to try to figure out a new routine.


















There are many ways to relieve
stress. Some teens write in
journals or listen to music;
some play sports, read, draw,
or talk to friends. If your usual
ways of dealing with stress are
not helping, you may want to
talk to a school guidance
counselor, mental health
professional or clergy person.

Separation and divorce can
cause new situations as time
goes on, for example if your
mom or dad, or both get
remarried. You may also have
to adjust to having step-
brothers or sisters, or even a
new baby. As these new
situations come up, it's normal
to have new feelings about
your parent's divorce.
Remember that although
divorce can complicate your
life, in time you will learn how
to handle your new family
situations.




Dealing with a divorce can be extremely
stressful. However there are many ways t
relieve stress. It may help to listen to
music, write in a journal, play sports, draw,
read or talk to friends. If these normal
distractions and ways to deal with stress
are not helping, itll be a good idea to talk
to your school counselor or a mental health
professional.




Separation and divorce can cause new
situations at home that you have to deal
with. Some of these situations may be that
your either or both of your parents get
remarried. This means that you will have to
adjust to some new family members and
having step-brothers, sisters or even a new
baby. As you approach these new
situations, it becomes normal to have
feelings about your parents divorce and
you may feel even more stressed out and
feel as though it is harder to move pass.
Keep in mind that divorce can complicate


Read more:
http://www.youngwomenshealth.or
g/divorce.html#ixzz38Dgmsu23

your life but in time you will look back and
realize that youve learn ways to handle
new family situations.
25/7/14 Sisters and
brothers
Sisters and brothers can be your best
friends and your worst enemies.
Sometimes you get along great and
sometimes you argue. This is all part
of growing up together! You may get
angry if your sister takes something
that is yours, goes into your room, or
bothers you when you have friends
over. Your older sisters or brothers
may tell you what to do. Your younger
sisters or brothers may borrow your
things without asking or want to be
around you all the time.
If you are having a hard time with your
sisters and brothers, make rules and talk
things out. Really listen to what your
sister or brother has to say.
Your siblings will be both your best friends
and worst enemy at different times. This is
because you are not the same person and
they will be disagreements about different
subjects. You may argue if your sibling
takes something or goes in your room
without permission. If you have older
siblings, they may tell you what to do and
your younger siblings may borrow your
things without permission or they can be
clingy and want to be around you all the
time.

If this is the case, instead of fighting try to
set rules and talk it out with your siblings
so there is a mutual understanding. Instead
of shutting your siblings off completely, try
to listen to what they have to say.

How do deal with
fights with your
brothers and
sisters
Talk to your parents/guardians. Talk
to your parents/guardians about
what is bothering you. They will
most likely be able to give you
Talk to your parents/guardians.
Your parents/guardians will most
likely know you and your siblings
very well which allows them to give

advice.
Set up your own space. Even if you
share a room, make a little space
(even if it is just a corner of your
room) that is all yours. Ask your
sister or brother to knock before
coming into your room or special
area.
Respect your sister or brother's
personal space, too. Your sister
or brother will be more likely to
respect your space.
Decide ahead of time how you are
going to share things like the
phone, cell phone, computer,
and TV. Figure out times for each
of you to use these items.
Pick your battles. Try to figure out
what is really bothering you. This
will help you to know if the problem
is worth fighting about. Some
things may be more important than
others.

you appropriate advice that would
hopefully help the situation.
Create your own space. Find a
space that is all yours. It is nice to
have a place to be in your own
bubble and think. If you share a
room, find a little space, this can be
the corner of a room and ask for it
to be all yours. Ask your siblings to
knock before coming into your
room or special spot.
Respect your siblings space. If
you respect their space, they will
most likely have a mutual respect
for you and your space back.
Make agreements on how you
decide to share things. Figure out
times for when each of you can use
items such as the phone, computer
or TV.
Pick your battles. Access the
situation and find out what is really
bothering you and if the problem is
wroth fighting about. Dont waste
your time on anything that isnt
important, it will get tiring.
Health issues and
your family
During both good and bad times, your
family can be your greatest source of
strength and support. But having a
In your life you will pass through both good
and bad times, throughout all of this your
family can be your biggest source of

chronic illness or disability can also
be a source of stress in your family.
They may be worried about you and
sad that you are ill. They may also be
confused about how best to meet
your needs and maybe even seem to
resent the tasks they have to do for
you. All of these emotions are normal,
and none of them are your fault.
Some parents may be more protective of
girls with disabilities and illnesses, and
slower to understand that you are
growing up. You can help your family deal
with your illness or disability by
understanding what each person may be
feeling and helping out where you can,
without overdoing it.
strength and support. Having a disability or
a chronic illness can add a source of stress
in your family. Your family will be worried,
upset and concerned if you are ill. Your
family members may have never had to go
through this making them confused about
how to approach certain tasks. All of these
emotions are valid and none of them are
your fault.

Some parents may be more protective over
their children with different illnesses or
disabilities and it will take them a longer
period of time to accept that you are
growing up. You can help your family by
understand what each person is feeling or
going through. You can find ways to help
them without going over the top.
27/7/14 Abuse within
families
Sadly, there are times when different
kinds of abuse happen in the home. Child
abuse is when any person caring for a
child fails to take care of the child,
physically hurts the child, or treats the
child in a sexual way. No matter what,
parents, stepparents, guardians, and
caregivers are supposed to protect and
care for their children. The term child
abuse doesnt just refer to young
children. Child abuse can happen to a
Abuse within families often means when a
caretaker is unable to take care of the child,
treats the child in an inappropriate sexual
manner or physically hurts the child. This
is not acceptable in any circumstances as
parents, guardians, stepparents are meant
to protect and take care of their children.
Child abuse can happy at any age and does
not just apply to young children but
teenagers as well.

child of any age, from infants to
teenagers.
Community
relationships
Just like you have relationships with
family and friends that take work, it is
also important to work on your
relationship with your community.
Community means the people
around you. You have a community
at your school and in your town. You
can be a good member of your
community by being a good person.
You can be a good person by showing
the good parts of your character.
Character is a set of values that helps
build your thoughts, actions, and feelings.
This is a very important part of who we
are.
Its important to have healthy relationships
with your community. This means the
people around you. This can be in your
school or neighborhood. You should build a
healthy relationship with them just like
how you have relationships with your
family and friends. All of these
relationships take work and time but it will
allow you to be a good member of your
community.

You can be a good person in your
community by sharing and expressing
positive aspects of your character. Your
character is the set of values and priorities
that help to build your thoughts, feelings
and actions. This is a large part of the
person you are.

People with strong
character
People with strong character:
Show compassion, which is caring
about other peoples feelings and
People with strong character:

Compassionate. Care about other

needs
Always tell the truth
Treat other people as they would like to
be treated
Show self-discipline, which is doing
things like getting homework done
on time without being told to
Make good judgments, which are
choices about what is right and
wrong
Show respect to others by being nice,
treating others fairly, and letting
other people have beliefs that may
be different from their own
Stand up for their beliefs
Have a strong sense of responsibility,
which means they take tasks such
as schoolwork or taking care of a
pet very seriously and work hard to
do a good job
Have self-respect, which means liking
who you are and taking good care of
yourself
peoples feelings and needs. Theyre
considerate.
Honest. Always tells the truth.
Stand up for what they believe is
right.
Show self discipline. For example
be responsible to do activities you
have signed up for or do homework
without anyone reminding or
nagging you.
Treat people the way you would like
to be treated.
Show respect for others. This can be
done by being nice, being fair and by
being open minded about other
peoples believes and allowing them
to have their own.
Make good judgments about what
you believe is the right or wrong
thing to do.
Have a sense of responsibility. This
means taking scenarios seriously
and working hard to do a good job
and stay determined.
Self respect is liking who you are
and taking good care of yourself.
2/8/14 Individual
feelings
Up and down, up and downthe teen
years can seem like an endless emotional
roller coaster. You might feel happy and
Teenage years may seem like a never-
ending emotional roller coaster full of ups
and downs where you will never be

confident in one moment, then sad or
confused in the next. Why? Your body is
changing, and your mind is very much a
part of this change too. Just knowing that
these highs and lows are normal can help
get you through the tough times. This
section of girlshealth.gov also can teach
you some healthy ways to cope with the
roller coaster.
happier or sadder. Your mood will
fluctuate and you may feel proud and
confident in yourself but the next moment
you may feel depressed and confused. This
happens because your body and mind are
going through a major change.
Understanding that this roller coaster is
normal and happens to all of us will
already make it easier to get through hard
times.
Feeling happy-
feeling good
about yourself
Part of being a teen is having
thoughts and feelings about different
parts of your life, such as how you
feel about:
Your friends and other kids your age
How you are doing in school and in
other activities
Your parents
The way you look
While having these new feelings,
many changes are also taking place
in your body. It is normal to feel self-
conscious or shy about the changes
in your body and emotions but there
are also changes to celebrate.
Sometimes feeling happy comes
naturally. When things are going your
Being a teenager means you are concerned
about many thoughts and feelings about
different aspects in your life. These things
can include:

How you are doing in school and
school related activities
Your friends and other people your
age around you. You may feel like
there is competition about who is
best about certain things.
You may be concerned about the
way you look. You may start caring
more about this because you will
have new changes in your body,
which will make you feel more self-
conscious or shy about the changes.
Remember that theyre also good
changes to celebrate.

way, its easy to feel happy. Say, for
example, that your soccer team wins
the regional championships. You may
find yourself smiling for a week!
Other times, you may have to work a bit
to feel happy. There are things you can
do to help. For example, did you know
that exercise can help you feel happy?
Getting regular exercise helps your body
produce endorphins (say: en-DOR-finz)
that make you feel good. You can also
eat healthy foods and get plenty of sleep.
This can help you feel good, too. Finally,
find a hobby that you really enjoy. All of
these things can help make you feel
happy.
Your parents
A lot of the time feeling happy does not
need to be forced especially when things
are going your way and there is less to
worry about. If something happens that
makes you happy such as getting on the
honor roll or making it in a sports team,
this may keep your mood up for a long
time.
Other times you may find that it is harder
to feel happy because some things are
bothering you or you can feel like you have
an extra weight on your shoulder.
However, they are always things you could
do to make you feel happy. For example,
regular exercise can help because it helps
the body to naturally produce endorphins,
which make you feel good. Simple things
like getting a healthy amount of sleep or
eating healthy foods can also make you feel
good. If you have a hoppy or an activity you
are passionate about you can also use it as
a distraction to help you feel better in the
meantime.
Self esteem You have probably heard adults talk
about self-esteem, but do you know
what it is? Self-esteem describes the
value and respect you have for
Self esteem is a concept that you would
have probably heard a lot about. Self
esteem is the word that describes the
respect and value you have for yourself.
Having a healthy self esteem means that

yourself.
If you have a healthy self-esteem,
you feel good about yourself as a
person and are proud of what you
can do. Having a healthy or high self-
esteem can help you to think
positively, deal better with stress, and
boost your drive to work hard.
If you have low self-esteem, you
probably feel bad about yourself all
the time. A low self-esteem may get
in the way of doing things you might
enjoy. For example, if you have a low
self-esteem you may not try out for
the school play because you think
you wont get picked for a role. But
how will you know unless you try? For
some, low self-esteem can contribute
to serious problems such as
depression, drug and alcohol use,
and eating disorders.
Its normal to feel down sometimes.
Everyone has their sad days and hard
days. This is not the same as having low
self-esteem. Having low self-esteem
means that you feel badly about yourself
you are proud of the things you do and that
you feel good about yourself as a person. It
is good to have high self esteem because it
makes it easier to deal with stress, it can
encourage positive thinking and boost your
motivation to work hard.

Having low self esteem means that you will
most likely beat yourself up a lot of the
time. Having a low self-esteem also means
that you may find it harder to do things
that you enjoy. An example of this would
not be trying out for a sports team because
you feel like you are not good enough
which means you miss out on a good
opportunity. The problem with this is that
you will not know unless you try. Having a
low self esteem can lead to problems such
as drug and alcohol use, eating disorders
and depression.

It is normal to feel sad sometimes because
everyone has days that are hard and sad.
This does not necessarily mean you have
low self-esteem. Having low self-esteem is
that you genuinely feel bad about yourself
constantly not just once in a while.
all of the time, not just once in a while.
3/8/14 Self confidence Self-confidence is a little different
from self-esteem. Self-confidence is
having a positive and realistic opinion
of yourself and being able to
accurately measure your abilities.
Self-confidence is also an important
part of feeling good about yourself.
Self-confidence is that little voice
inside of you that tells you that you
are okay, that you are a good person,
and that you know how to deal with
things in good times and in bad.
Confidence can develop as you grow
up. As a baby, you started to learn
self-confidence from knowing your
family loved you. As you learned to
walk, play, and talk you also learned
self-confidence. Now as a young
woman, you are learning to be more
self-confident in school, playing
sports, and in other social settings.
Sometimes this is hard. Participating
in class, talking to new teachers or
students, or trying out for an after-
school activity may make you feel
stressed or anxious. That is normal!
There is a small difference between self-
confidence and self-esteem. Self-confidence
is having a realistic but also positive
opinion about yourself and your abilities.

Self -confidence is a big and important part
of being able to feel good about yourself.
Self -confidence can come in the form of the
quiet voice that reminds you of your self
worth. Reminding you that you are a good
person with good intentions, you know
how to deal with things in both good and
bad times and that you are okay.

Confidence is something that develops as
you grow up. For example, if you grew up
with a loving family you self-confidence
may have been high as a kid. You may have
learned self-confidence when it came to
learning how to talk, play or walk. Growing
up in your teen years you may have
developed self-confidence learning how to
play sports or in social settings such as
parties or just meeting up with friends.
Taking part in classroom discussions and
being able to share your ideas may also
boost your self-confidence. Even though
these things may seem scary it will help

The good news is, as you try new
things, you gain confidence in spite of
your fears. In fact, that is what real
self-confidence is your belief that
you can do things well even when
you have doubts.
you build up your self confidence. You will
have to pass the feelings of anxiety or
stress from some activities but it will be
better in the long term. Self confidence is
about believing that you can do things well
even when you have doubts at the back of
your mind.
5/8/14 Rate your self
esteem
I feel good about who I am.
I am proud of what I can do, but I do
not show off.
I know there are some things that I am
good at and some things I need to
improve.
I am responsible for the things I do and
say, both good and bad.
It is okay if I win or if I lose.
Before I do something, I usually think I
can do it.





If you are able to agree with the statements
below means that you most likely have a
high or healthy self-esteem.
I am proud of what I can accomplish
but I do not show off about it.
I am proud and feel good of who I
am.
Before doing something, I think I
can do it to myself.
It is okay to both win and lose.
I accept that there are some things
that I am good at but also things that
I need to improve in.
I am responsible for my own actions
both good and bad.









I cant do anything right.
I am ugly or dumb.
I do not have any friends.
I do not like to try new things.
It really upsets me to make mistakes.
I do not think I am as nice, pretty, or
smart as the other girls in my
class.
I have a hard time making friends.
I have a hard time making friends
because I end up getting angry
and fighting with people.
It makes me uncomfortable when
people say nice things about me.
Sometimes I feel better if I say mean
things to other people.
You will most likely agree with the
following statements if you are struggling
with having a healthy or high self esteem.
I am ugly.
I am dumb.
I am never able to complete
something the right way.
I have nobody there for me.
I like to avoid trying new things.
It is hard for me to make friends.
I beat myself up a lot when I make
mistakes.
I feel uncomfortable when people
compliment or say nice things about
me.
Saying mean things to others makes
me feel better at times.


6/8/14 Boost your self
esteem
Tell yourself that it is okay not to be the
best at everything.
Help out by doing chores around the
house and volunteering in your
community.
Do things that you enjoy, or learn about
new things you would like to try.
Understand that there will be times
when you will feel disappointed in
yourself and other people. No one
Below are ways to boost your self esteem:
Accept that it is okay to not be the
best at everything. For example
someone in your class may be better
at biology than you and that is okay.
You should not compare yourself to
everybody if it brings you down.
Do activities that you enjoy or find
new hobbies that interest you.

is perfect!
If you are angry, try talking it over with
an adult you trust
(parents/guardians, relatives or a
school counselor).
Think positively about yourself and the
things you can do. Think: "I will
try!"
If you still find that you are not feeling
good about yourself, talk to your
parents/guardian, a school counselor,
or your doctor because you may be at
risk for depression. (You can also ask
the school nurse for help through
tough times. Some schools offer
counseling.) Learn more about
depression and other health issues
that can affect your mind.
Try volunteering in your community
to help things or people around you.
This can make you feel as though
you have accomplished something.
Understand that we all have times
where we feel like we disappointed
ourselves. Know that nobody is
perfect and you should not
constantly beat yourself up for it.
If you are feeling angry try talking to
a trusted adult, this can be your
relative, parents or even counselor.
It is better to talk things out because
you may regret some actions and
choices you make in the moment.
Think positively and be proud of
yourself when you accomplish
something you have done. This may
be getting in a sports team or
getting a good grade on a test you
studied for.

If these tips do not work well for you and
you are still feeling down and low about
yourself try talking to your school
counselor or parents/guardian. Talking to
a doctor may also be an option as you may
be at risk for depression.

6/8/14 Rate your self
confidence
I am eager to learn new things.
I take pride in doing a good job and
being a nice person.
I can handle criticism without being too
emotional.
I know what things I am good at, and
those that Im not.
It is okay if I win or if I lose.
Before I do something, I usually think I
can do it.
I like to try to do things without help, but
I don't mind asking for help if I
really need it.
I like myself.








I do not like to try new things.
I cant do anything right.
If my friends criticize me, or if my
teacher corrects a lot on my
homework, I get very upset.
I dont know what I am good at.
I have a hard time meeting new people
or making friends.
If you agree with most of the statements
below means that you have a high or
healthy level of self-confidence.
I look forward to learning and trying
new things.
It is okay if I win or lose as long as I
gave it my best shot and enjoyed it.
I can take criticism from others
without having it hurt me or attack
me personally.
I am prideful when it comes to being
a nice person or doing a good job.
I like to try things on my own first
but if I get stuck I have no problem
asking for help.
Before I do something, I usually
think, I can do it to myself.
I am able to separate things that I
am good at and things that I need
help with.
Overall as a person, I like myself.
However if you have a lower level of self
confidence you will most likely agree with
the statements below:
I feel very upset and think about
criticism that my friends or teachers
give me.
I like to avoid doing new things.

I am embarrassed to ask a question or
speak up in class.
Before I do something, I may think I
cant do it.
I dont like to try new things unless
someone shows me how to do it
first.
I dont like myself.







I feel like I am not good at anything
and I always do something wrong.
I am not aware of what activities I
am good at.
Before doing something I think to
myself I cant do it.
I dont like to try new things unless
someone explains and gives a
demonstration on how to do it first.
I feel embarrassed when I have to
ask a question or present in class.
I hate it when people give me
attention.
Overall, I do not like myself as a
person.
7/8/14 Boost your self
confidence
Think positive thoughts about yourself!
Focus on your strengths not
your weaknesses. Realize that you
are better at some things than
others.
Set realistic goals. This means not
setting goals too high or too low,
but at a level you know you can
reach. Then, you can always strive
to do better than your goal.
Give yourself credit when you reach a
goal and praise yourself when you
have done well.
Learn to be assertive express your
Set goals for yourself that is possible
to reach. This will give you the
feeling of satisfaction when you
achieve it making you want to strive
more and do even better.
Praise yourself when you do well
and give yourself something that
you deserve when you do.
Remember it is important to look
after yourself.
Try to focus on good things about
yourself. Know your weaknesses
but you should not dwell on them.

thoughts, opinions, needs, and
feelings openly but without
abusing others rights.
Dont compare yourself to others.
Remember: youre just fine the
way you are!
Practice positive body language. Walk
tall, dont slump. When your body
says I can everyone will believe
you can.

Praise yourself for what you are
good at. Do not compare yourself to
others.
Be assertive, not aggressive. Be able
to express your opinions and
thoughts without hurting or
offending other people and their
rights.
Have good body language and
present yourself in a good manner.
For example do not slump while
walking. When your body shows
people that you can do something,
everyone else will believe it too.
8/8/14 Feeling sad As a teenager, there are so many
changes taking place in your body
and with your emotions that it can be
very overwhelming. As a teenager,
there are so many changes taking
place in your body and with your
emotions that it can be very
overwhelming. You might feel like you
are in a great mood one minute and a
bad one the next. This roller coaster
of emotions is normal. It's OK to have
the blues sometimes and there are
things you can do to feel better. Try
these tips to improve your mood:
It is easy to be overwhelmed with your
emotions during your teenage years as
there are a lot of changes occurring in your
body, both physically and in your mind.
This may cause you to quickly switch
moods and may go form being extremely
happy to sad in the next minute. This is
completely normal at this period in your
life. It is okay to have days where you feel
like shutting yourself off from everyone
when you are in a bad mood but there are
things you can do to make you feel better.
Below are some tips that will hopefully be
able to cheer you up!


Know that what you are going through
is very common.
Find a way to relax, such as sitting
down and taking a deep breath or
taking a shower.
Talk to your friends, parents/guardians,
teachers, counselors, or doctors
about what you are feeling. They
can help you sort through your
emotions.
Get some exercise. When you
exercise, your body makes more
special chemicals called
endorphins. Endorphins can help
improve your mood.
Make sure that you get enough rest.
Being tired can make you feel
more stressed.
If you have started getting your
period, you may find that you feel
sad on the days before or during
your period. This is normal and
happens to many girls. You can
use this calendar to track your
period and to track the days you
feel sad to see if they are the
same.
There is a big difference between having
Find a way to relax. This can be
done by showering, listening to
music, taking a long bath, talking to
a close friend or even just going for
a walk.
Understand that what you ae going
through is common for you age and
it is nothing to beat yourself up for.
Let these feelings pass.
If your feelings get overwhelming,
there is always the option to talk to
someone. You can talk to your
siblings, friends, parents/guardians,
doctors, counselors or even teachers
at your school. Hopefully they will
be able to help you sort and mange
your feelings.
Not getting enough sleep and being
tired can increase your stress levels
os be sure that you are getting
enough sleep in order to have a
fresh start to the day.
Endorphins are chemicals in your
body that can help to improve your
mood. Your body can make these
chemicals while exercising so going
to the gym may be a good idea too!


the blues and having depression.
Depression is a serious illness that
affects many young people. The good
news is that depression can be treated.
Make sure to talk to your doctor or school
counselor about any worries you have
about depression.
Know that having a bad day or the blues is
very different to having depression.
Depression is an illness that affects many
young people n this generation. Although it
can be treated it is still very serious and
you should talk to a doctor or school
counselor if you have any worries or
doubts about diagnosing depression

10/8/14 How will I know if I
have depression?
Before puberty, boys and girls are equally
likely to develop depressive disorders. By
age 15, however, girls are twice as likely
as boys to have serious depression.
While some signs of depression can
seem a lot like just having the blues,
there is a way to know if you need to talk
to your doctor about depression. See
your doctor about depression if you have
many of the symptoms below and if they
get in the way of your day-to-day living.
Symptoms of depression
Sadness or crying that you cant
explain
Major changes in the way you eat, such
as not eating or over-eating
Being crabby, angry, worried or
nervous
Feeling negative or not caring about
anything
Boys and girls are equally likely to develop
depressive disorders before puberty takes
place. However, at the age of 15 it is twice
as likely for girls to develop serious
depression. Depression may just seem like
having the blues but if you have symptoms
below and they interfere with your day-to-
day living, please consult a doctor.


Symptoms of depression:
Feeling sad or crying for reasons
you cant explain. You may not know
the cause or root of your sadness.
Constantly feeing worried, anxious,
nervous or angry. You may snap at
people easily for small reasons.
Major changes in your appetite. This
may be both over-eating or not
eating.

Feeling guilty or worthless
Thinking about death or committing
suicide
Sleep changes, such as sleeping more
or having trouble sleeping
Not being able to focus or make a
decision
Not being able to enjoy the things you
usually enjoy
Not wanting to spend time with your
friends
Feeling restless or tired most of the
time
If your doctor decides that you do have
depression, there are many ways it can
be treated. The important thing is to get
help.
Not seeing the purpose in anything
and not caring about anything
taking place around you.
A change in your sleeping routine.
Not being able to sleep or not being
able to get out of bed because you
do not want to face the day.
Feeling worthless and guilty.
You no longer find joy in things that
you used to enjoy doing. This can be
hobbies such as drawing, cooking or
maybe even some sports.
Thinking about dying or committing
suicide.
Not being able to make decisions.
Not being able to focus in and out of
school.
Excluding yourself from your
friends and pushing them away
because you do not want to spend
time with them.
Feeling tired or restless most of the
time.
If you have these symptoms and you
talk to your doctor, dont worry there
are many ways it can be treated. The
first priority is to get help.

10/8/14 How can I help a
friend or relative
who is depressed?
With all the changes taking place and
new demands on your time, it is
normal for you and your friends to
feel down sometimes. But if you have
a friend who has been down for
weeks, she or he may be dealing with
depression. You can learn about
depression in young people and how
to help a friend. To help a friend or
relative:
Offer emotional support, understanding,
patience, and encouragement.
Engage your friend or relative in
conversation, and listen carefully.
Never shoot down the feelings your
friend or relative expresses, but
point out realities and offer hope.
Never ignore comments about suicide.
Report them to your friend's or
relative's parent, teacher, school
counselor, school nurse, therapist,
or doctor.
Invite your friend or relative out for
walks and other activities. Keep
trying if he or she says no, but
don't push him or her to take on
too much too soon.
Remind your friend or relative that with
As you go through your teenage years it is
normal to have short periods of time wehre
you feel down but if you have a friend or a
relative who seems to be feeling down for
weeks, he/she may be dealing with
depression.
Below are ways that you can possibly help
her/him.

Be supportive of them, offer
emotional support, encouragement,
be patient and understanding. If
they act out and let things out on
you, try not to take things they say
out of anger or their bad mood to
heart.
If they mention anything about
suicide do not ignore it, report them
to your school counselor, their
parents, teacher, therapist or their
doctor. This could help a lot in the
long term to ensure their safety.
Engage them in a conversation and
try to include them. Listen carefully
to what they say and make sure they
do not feel ignored.
Invite them to do activities with you.
This can be as simple as going for a
movie or a run. If they decline the

time and treatment, the depression
will get better.

offer, dont push them.
Remind them that time will heal a
lot and that with treatment they will
get better.
Talk about things that they can look
forward to in the future.
Surround them with good company
and people whom they love.
Be there to comfort them. This can
even mean just sitting in a room
sharing silence. This will help them
from feeling lonely.



Cutting and hurting
yourself:
What does hurting
yourself mean
Hurting yourself, sometimes called
self-injury, is when a person
deliberately hurts his or her own
body. Some self-injuries can leave
scars that wont go away, while
others leave marks or bruises that
eventually will go away. These are
some forms of self-injury:
Cutting yourself (such as using
a razor blade, knife, or other
sharp object to cut the skin)
Punching yourself or punching things
Self-injury is when a person intentionally
hurts her or his own body. These injuries
range from scars that dont go away while
others eventually fade away.
Some forms of self-injury are:

Cutting yourself using a sharp object
to the skin like a knife or razor
blade. People often cut their wrist,
thighs or places that are easy to
hide.
Punching yourself or things around
you. A lot of people punch walls to
let things out.

(like a wall)
Burning yourself with cigarettes,
matches, or candles
Pulling out your hair
Poking objects through body openings
Breaking your bones or bruising
yourself
Burning your body with candles,
matches or cigarettes.
Pulling your hair out.
Breaking bones on purpose.
Bruising your body on purpose.
Why do some teens
want to hurt
themselves?
Many people cut themselves because
it gives them a sense of relief. Some
people use cutting as a means to
cope with a problem. Some teens say
that when they hurt themselves, they
are trying to stop feeling lonely,
angry, or hopeless. Some teens who
hurt themselves have low self-
esteem, they may feel unloved by
their family and friends, and they may
have an eating disorder, an alcohol or
drug problem, or may have been
victims of abuse.
Teens who hurt themselves often
keep their feelings bottled up inside
and have a hard time letting their
feelings show. Some teens who hurt
themselves say that feeling the pain
provides a sense of relief from
intense feelings. Cutting can relieve
People self harm because it gives them a
sense of relief. Some people turn to cutting
as a form of dealing with a problem and
they let out their emotions that way
instead of being able to talk to someone
close to them or do activities that make
them happy. Some teens cut to try to stop
feeling hopeless, angry, lonely or hurt.
Usually, teens that hurt themselves have
low self-esteem and may not receive a
large amount of love from their friends or
family. They may also be dealing with
problems such as being involved in drugs
or alcohol. They may also be suffering from
an eating disorder or have been victims of
abuse in the past.

Teens who let things out on themselves
usually keep their feelings bottled up to
themselves. This may be because they feel
that talking to others or asking for help will

the tension from bottled up sadness
or anxiety. Others hurt themselves in
order to feel. Often people who hold
back strong emotions can begin
feeling numb, and cutting can be a
way to cope with this because it
causes them to feel something. Some
teens also may hurt themselves
because they want to fit in with others
who do it.
If you are hurting yourself, PLEASE
GET HELP It is possible to
overcome the urge to cut. There are
other ways to find relief and cope with
your emotions. Please talk to your
parents, your doctor, or an adult you
trust, like a teacher or religious
leader.
bother the other person and they rather
deal with it by themselves. Some teens
have said that the feeling of pain from self-
injury gives a sense of relief from intense
feelings. They may rather focus and feel
pain rather than other things. Other teens
can also experience nothing at all and they
feel numb and use self-injury as a form to
feel. This allows them to feel something
and they may think that feeling pain is
better than not feeling anything at all.
Another reason why teenagers may self-
harm is because they want to fit in with
other people who do it if you are in an
environment where people often do.

If you are someone that hurts themselves
please get help. It is possible to get through
self-injury and overcome the urge to cut.
You can be given help to find ways to cope
with your emotions without hurting
yourself. Please talk to trusted adult or
close friends that are able to help you.
Remember that you can get through it and
the first step is accepting the problem and
then going through recovery. Your scars
will heal.


10/8/14 What are the signs
of self-injury?
These are some signs of self-
injury:
Cuts or scars on the arms or legs that
you can see
Hiding cuts or scars by wearing long-
sleeved shirts or pants, even in hot
weather
Making poor excuses about how the
injuries happened

Self-injury can be dangerous. Cutting
can lead to infections, scars,
numbness, and even hospitalization
or death. People who share tools to
cut themselves are at risk of getting
and spreading diseases like HIV and
hepatitis. Teens who continue to hurt
themselves are less likely to learn
how to cope with negative feelings.
Below are some signs of self-injury to keep
in mind to know if people around you need
your help.

Cuts or scars that are visible on
their legs or arms.
Hiding cuts and scars. This can
mean wearing long-sleeved shirts or
pants even in hot weather.
Making up excuses about how they
got the cuts or scars. They may say
things like their cat scratched them
or they tripped and fell.
Self-injury can be incredibly dangerous
because cutting can lead to infections,
numbness, scars, being hospitalized or
even death if you cut too deep. If you share
tools that you cut yourself with, there is a
risk of spreading diseases like HIV or
hepatitis. By hurting yourself, it will be
harder to learn how to deal with negative
feelings in the future. Try to think about
your actions instead of acting in the
moment.

10/8/14 Dealing with grief Traumatic events such as divorce,
violence, or abuse, and the death of a
friend, family member, or pet can leave
you feeling frightened, confused, and
insecure. This is perfectly normal. But
There are some particular events that may
take place in your life which has a lasting
impact making you feel frightened,
insecure and confused. Some events may
be violence, abuse, divorce or the death of a

whether you have personally experienced
trauma, have seen it on television, or
merely heard adults talking about it, it can
have an effect on you.

friend, family member or pet. If you
personally experience trauma you will
know that it can have a large effect on you.
You may see trauma on television or hear
adults talk about it. It may seem scary but
these events too will pass.
10/8/14 What is grief? When we have emotional, physical,
and spiritual reactions in response to
a death or loss, it's known
as grief or grieving. People who are
grieving might:
Feel strong emotions, such as
sadness and anger
Have physical reactions, such as
not sleeping or feeling sick to their
stomach
Have spiritual reactions to a death.
For example, some people may
feel disappointed in their religion,
while others find that they feel
more strongly than ever about
their faith.


After a death or a loss, people have
emotional, physical or even spiritual
reactions. This is whats known as grief or
grieving. When you are grieving you may:
Feeling sick in their stomach. This
may result to a loss of appetite and
refusing to eat or throwing up.
Not sleeping. Unusual sleep
routines.
Feeling strong emotions. Usually
extreme sadness or anger.
Some people may have a spiritual
reaction to loss of a family member.
They may feel disappointed in their
religion and their god while others
feel stronger about their faith.

10/8/14 How can you deal
with grief?
Different people handle grief in
different ways. Some ways of
People handle grief in multiple ways. Some
ways are:

handling grief include:
1. Find comfort in good memories.
Looking through old photo albums
is one way to do this.
2. Stay very busy to keep your mind
off of the sadness. Picking up an
extra hobby is one way to do this.
3. Talk about your loss. Some people
do this naturally and easily with
friends and family, while others
talk to a professional therapist.
4. Exercise every day. Sports,
walking, jogging, swimming, and
dancing can help you feel better.
5. Put your feelings into words or
pictures. Try writing in a journal,
blogging, or drawing. If its hard
for you to talk about your feelings,
putting them on paper can help
you feel better.
6. Listen to music. Try singing along
to songs that have meaning for
you.


Finding comfort in good memories
in the past. This can be watching old
videos, finding old belongings or
going through old photo albums.
This can bring up a lot of feelings of
both happiness and sadness.
Stay busy and avoid having to deal
with feelings. Some people find it
better to keep their mind busy and
distracted from the sadness. One
way to do this is start a new activity
or find a hobby they enjoy taking
part in.
Some people find comfort in
exercising and keeping their body
healthy. This can be taking part in
sports such as walking, swimming,
dancing, jogging to make you feel
better.
It helps some people to talk about
their loss. You may like to talk to
your close family, friends or a
professional therapist or counselor.
Listen to music. Find songs that you
are able to related to. Some people
like to sing as a means of self-
expression.
Some people are talented when it
comes to putting their emotions into
words or images. Writing in a
journal, blogging or drawing may be
a good solution if you dont feel
comfortable to talk to someone
about your feelings.
11/8/14 Body image Have you ever thought that there was
something wrong with the way you
look? Do you think that you are too
short or too tall, too heavy or too
skinny?
If you have had thoughts like these,
you are not alone. These feelings
about how you look are called body
image. Body image and self-esteem
are tied together since body image
can affect how you feel about your
whole self. When you put yourself
down about how you look, it can lead
to negative feelings about yourself in
general. Poor self-esteem can also
lead to eating disorders that can put
your health in danger.
If you start to have negative thoughts
about your body and the way you
look, think about all of the traits that
make you special and unique. Look at
your whole self body and mind
in a positive way and write down what
Doubting yourself is a big part of growing
up. The majority of teens think that there is
something wrong with the way they look.
This could be feeling insecure about your
weight or height.


Feeling like this is common so never feel
alone. These feelings that concern you
about the way you look is what body image
is about. Body image directly affects your
self-esteem because it can change the
whole way you look at yourself. It can add
more negative thoughts and feelings about
yourself in general. If you have poor self-
esteem it can lead to more serious
problems in the future. This may be self-
injury or eating disorders. All of these
things put your health in danger and it is
very important to take good care and know
what your body deserves.


If you start believing the negative thoughts

you see. Need a hand getting started?
Focus on the good things in your life
by using the girlshealth.gov Just
4Me log.
Or before you go to bed at night,
name three things you did that day
that made you happy. By focusing on
the positive aspects of your life you
can feel more positive about yourself!
Don't forget to give yourself
compliments too! Say it out loud when
the day is done! Like, "Today I played
my best in our soccer game," or "My
family loved the dessert I made
tonight!" or "My friends really liked the
jokes I told them."
If you are struggling with an eating
disorder or just can't seem to feel
better, talk to an adult you trust right
away.
Remember:
You are beautiful!
You are one of a kind!
Real beauty comes from inside!

that are in your head, try to focus on things
that make you special and unique instead.
Look in the mirror and instead of picking
out flaws try finding things that you like
about yourself. This can be your dimples,
legs, smile or even eyebrows! You do not
only need to focus on physical attributes
but think about some personal traits as
well. Are you a good listener? Fast runner?
Caring friend? Responsible daughter? Its
all about what you choose to focus on. Pick
the good.


Another tip to end your day on a good note
is to think about three things that took
place during the day that gave you joy and
made you happy. By doing this you will not
over think about the bad things that
occurred earlier. Having a positive outlook
on life can make you feel more positive
about yourself individually. It may even be
nice to give yourself compliments too,
remember that you deserve it!

Some special things to always
remember are: You are unique;
there is nobody like you.
Nobody or nothing can define your
self worth.
You are beautiful inside out.
There is a future.

11/8/14 What are some
things you may
stress about
Why am I taller than most of the
boys my age?
Why havent I grown any?
Am I too skinny?
Am I overweight?
Why is my weight going up and
down?
Am I normal? Will others like me
now that I am changing?
My breasts are too small.
My breasts are too large
Why am I so emotional?
Why am I getting pimples?
Do my clothes look right on my
body?
That new dress style doesnt fit me
my friends wont think Im cool.

Here are some things you may worry or
stress about but remember it is totally
normal and you are not alone.
Am I too skinny and lanky?
Am I fat or overweight?
Why is my weight fluctuating so
much?
Why do I have so many mood
swings?
Why am I getting so emotional?
Do the clothes I buy look right on
my body?
Are the things I buy up to date with
trends?
Do my friends think Im cool?
Will my friends leave me if Im
changing?
Am I going to be alone?


11/8/14 Eating disorders Eating disorders are real, treatable Eating disorders is a medical illness where
medical illnesses. When a girl has an
eating disorder, she tries to control the
amount or kinds of foods she eats. She
may become so focused on eating (or not
eating) that she hurts her body. There are
three kinds of eating disorders.

Anorexia nervosa. A girl with
anorexia nervosa (say: an-uh-RECK-
see-uh nur-VOH-suh), often called
anorexia, is afraid to gain weight.
Someone with anorexia thinks about
food a lot and limits the food she eats,
even though she is too thin. Anorexia
is more than just a problem with food.
It's a way of using food or starving
oneself to feel more in control of life
and to ease tension, anger, and
anxiety. Most people with anorexia are
female.
An anorexic:
Has a low body weight for her
height
Resists keeping a normal body
weight
Has an intense fear of gaining
weight
you try to control the amount or kinds of
food you eat. You may become focused on
not eating which hurts the body. Eating
disorders are real and treatable. There are
three different types of eating disorders.

Anorexia nervosa:
Someone who has this illness is afraid to
gain weight and thinks a lot about the food
that is eaten and sets up guidelines for
themselves that they need to follow. If they
dont they will usually feel guilty or bad
about it. Anorexia is not just an illness
regarding avoiding to eat food but it is also
to do with using food as a means of
starving to feel more control in their life or
as a way to ease anger, anxiety or tension.
Usually people who battle anorexia are
female.
Someone who battles anorexia has:
Low body weight in proportion to
height. Low BMI (body mass index).
Has an intense fear of gaining
weight.
Females who battle anorexia usually
skip three menstrual periods in a
row.


Thinks she is fat even when very
thin
Misses 3 menstrual periods in a
row (for girls/women who have
started having their periods)
2. Bulimia nervosa. A girl with
bulimia nervosa (say: buh-LEE-
me-ah nur-VOH-suh), usually
called bulimia, eats a lot of food in
a short amount of time (binge
eating). She then tries to stop
weight gain by getting rid of the
food (purging). Purging is:
Making yourself throw up
Taking laxatives (pills or liquids
that speed up the movement of
food through your body and lead
to a bowel movement)
A person with bulimia feels she
cannot control how much food she
eats. Also, bulimics might exercise
a lot, eat very little or not at all, or
take pills to pass urine often to
prevent weight gain.
Unlike anorexia, girls with bulimia






Bulimia nervosa:
Someone battling bulimia usually eats a lot
of food in a short amount of time, this is
called binge eating and then gets rid of the
food by purging to avoid gaining weight.
Purging is making your body throw up on
purpose. You could also take laxatives
which helps to speed up the movement of
food through the body.

A person who is battling bulimia would
usually feel like they do not have control
over the amount of food they consume.
They usually exercise a lot to avoid weight
gain and take pills, which cause them to
pee a lot, which also prevents weight gain.

The difference between people who have
bulimia and anorexia is that people with
bulimia can still fall within a normal range
for their height and weight and have a
normal BMI (body mass index).

can fall within the normal range for
their age and weight.
But like people with anorexia,
bulimics:
Fear gaining weight
Want desperately to lose weight
Are very unhappy with their body
size and shape
Binge eating disorder. Girls with
binge eating disorder eat an unusually
large amount of food and feel out of
control during the binges. For
example, they may eat an entire bag
of cookies, or a whole pizza. Unlike
bulimia or anorexia, binge eaters do
not throw up their food, exercise a lot,
or eat only small amounts of only
certain foods. Because of this, binge
eaters are often overweight or obese.
People with binge eating disorder also
may:
Eat more quickly than usual during
binge episodes
Eat until they are uncomfortably
full
People with bulimia fear gaining weight,
try everything to lose weight or prevent
gaining weight and are usually extremely
unhappy with their body shape and size
and will go to extreme measures to change
that.



Binge eating disorder:
People who binge eat are people who eat
an unusual large amount of food and feel
like they have no control over the food they
eat or the amount. An example of bing
eating is eating a whole box of pizza or
chocolate or a jar of cookies. The different
between people who binge eat and people
who are either anorexic or bulimic is that
binge eaters do not throw up their food,
exercise a lot or eat food in small amounts.
Binge eaters are usually overweight or
obese due to this.
Some signs of binge eating include:
Eating very quickly.
Eat even when you are not hungry.
Embarrassed about the amount you
eat so usually find it more
comfortable to eat alone.
Feel upset, guilty or even disgusted
Eat when they are not hungry
Eat alone because of
embarrassment
Feel disgusted, depressed, or
guilty after overeating




once you over eat.
Eat to the point where youre
uncomfortably full and may feel
sick.
12/8/14 Feeling stressed
What is stress?
Stress is what you feel when you react
to pressure from others or from
yourself. Pressure can come from
anywhere, including school, work,
activities, friends, and family
members. You can also feel stress
from the pressure of wanting to get
good grades or wanting to feel like
you belong. Stress comes in many
forms and everyone feels stress.


Stress is the outcome of how you react to
pressure externally or internally. External
stress is from people around you and
internal stress is the stress you put on
yourself. The pressure may be coming from
schoolwork, social problems, family
members or friends. A common source of
pressure is striving to get good grades and
stressing that you wont and you will end
up disappointing yourself and others
around you instead. You may also feel
stressed when you feel like you are being
left out and dont particularly belong
anywhere. Everybody feels stress at times.

12/8/14 How does my body
handle stress?
Your body has a built-in response to
handle stress. When something stressful
When there is pressure on your, your body
deals with stress in different ways. For

happens, you may experience sweaty
palms, dry mouth, or knots in your
stomach. This is totally normal and
means that your body is working exactly
as it should. Other signs of stress include
emotional signs (such as feeling sad or
worried), behavioral signs (such as
crying), and mental signs (such as not
being able to concentrate or focus).

example you may feel knots or butterflies
in your stomach, sweaty hands or a dry
mouth. If this happens to you, dont worry,
your body is doing what its meant to do,
nothing unusual. Other signs of stress
include feeling worried or sad which may
lead to crying. You may also find that it
comes a lot harder to focus or concentrate
on a task at hand.
12/8/14 What causes
stress?
School work
Not feeling good about yourself
Changes in your body or weight
Body shape or size
Problems with friends, boyfriends,
or other kids at school
Living in a dangerous
neighborhood
Peer pressure from friends to
dress or act a certain way, or
smoke, drink, or use drugs
Not fitting in or being part of a
group
Moving or friends moving away
Separation or divorce of parents
Growing up there are many things that can
cause stress, below are some:
Work assigned from school
Changes in your body. This can be
both your height, weight, body
shape or body size.
Problems or misunderstandings
with friends, boyfriends or other
people at school such as teachers.
Not being part of a group, feeling lef
out.
Having to move or have someone
close to you leave.
Living in a dangerous area.
Peer pressure to do things you
know arent right. For example to
smoke drink or do drugs.
Having a family member or


A family member who is ill
Death of a loved one
Changing schools
Taking on too many activities at
once
Not getting along with your parents
or having problems at home
Feeling lonely
There may be other things that
cause stress for you that are not
on this list. Also, it can be very
tough when more than one
stressful event happens at the
same time or stress is ongoing.


someone close to you whos sick/ill.
Changing schools, having to start
over.
Not getting alone with your parents
or constantly having fights at home.
Parents going through a divorce or
separation.
Feeling lonely.
Taking too many activities and not
having time to yourself.
Death of a loved one.

Above are just a few examples for multiple
things that cause stress. It becomes harder
to deal with when more than one stressful
thing is going on.
12/8/14 Is stress always a
bad thing?
No! A little bit of stress can work in a
positive way. For instance, during a
sports competition, stress might push you
to perform better. Also, without the stress
of deadlines, you might not be able to
finish schoolwork or get to where you
need to be on time.

A small amount of stress may not be a bad
thing and can have a positive effect! For
example, if youre taking place in a sports
tournament, a small amount of stress can
motivate you to play better. Stress can also
help to make sure you reach deadlines
when it comes to work. It helps you to stay
organized and know what you have to get
done and by when.

13/8/14 What are signs that
show youre feeling
stressed out?
Signs that you are stressed out:
Feeling down, edgy, guilty, or tired
Having headaches or
stomachaches
Having trouble sleeping
Laughing or crying for no reason
Blaming others for bad things that
happen to you
Wanting to be alone all the time
(withdrawal)
Not being able to see the positive
side of a situation
Not enjoying activities that you
used to enjoy
Feeling resentful of people or
things you have to do
Feeling like you have too many
things you have to do

You can tell if you are stressed out if:
You find like you want to be alone
most of the time.
You blame other people or things
around you when something bad
happens to you.
You find it difficult to sleep.
Not seeing the fun in activities and
hobbies you used to like and enjoy.
Feeling overwhelmed because you
have too many things that you need
to get done.
Not seeing the positive or good side
in situations.
Having stomachaches, headaches or
migraines.
Feeling tired, restless, edgy or down
in general.


15/8/14 Post traumatic
stress disorder
How can you deal
with the stress of a
disaster, or a tragic
Sometimes we are part of or have
lived through a very stressful event
such as a hurricane, a serious car
accident, or an assault, like date rape.
These kinds of scary events can
During your life it is likely that you will
have to go through an experience or
stressful event which can lead to strong
stress reaction in the victims. An example
of an event can be a natural disaster such

or violent event? cause a very strong stress reaction in
the victims, but the reactions may be
different for each person. Some
become cranky or depressed. Others
can't sleep or have nightmares. Some
people may keep reliving the
experience, others might experience
nervousness and their hearts might
race, and some people put the event
out of their minds. Feelings that lead
to this type of stress include fear, a
sense that your life is in danger,
helplessness, or horror.
You dont have to be hurt to
experience this type of stress, You
can simply be a witness to the
event or be threatened with
physical harm to have this type of
stressful reaction.

as a tsunami, hurricane, tornado or a car
accident, rape or an assault. Different
people react to these events differently. For
example some people may become cranky,
depressed. Others experience insomnia or
have constant nightmares relating to the
event that took place. Some people may
always have flashbacks about the traumatic
experience while other people have the
event out of their minds and do not think
about it at all. Feelings that lead to this
extreme type of stress include
helplessness, horror, fear or the constant
thought that your life is in danger.

In order to go through this type of stress,
you do not have to be the one that goes
through the experience. You may just be a
witness to the event or been threatened
with physical harm, you do not have to be
physically hurt.
15/8/14 Post traumatic
stress order
Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD)
is when a person has a lot of anxiety
or fear after a scary event. PTSD can
happen after all different kinds of
events a mugging, a bad car
accident, date rape, abuse, a terrorist
Post-traumatic stress disorder, also known
as PTSD occurs once a person goes through
ha scary event and experiences a high level
of fear or anxiety after the event takes
place. There are a variety of bad events that
can happen from things like a bad car
accident to war.

attack, or war.
You don't have to be the one who was
hurt to experience PTSD. Even
watching something scary on
television can lead to PTSD. For
example, after the events of
September 11, 2001, some people
developed PTSD symptoms. Usually
that's because of the strong feeling of
fear, helplessness, or fright that goes
with these things.
It's normal to be super-stressed after
going through something traumatic.
Strong emotions, jitters, and trouble
sleeping, eating, or concentrating may
all be part of a normal and temporary
reaction to an overwhelming event. So
might frequent thoughts and images of
what happened, nightmares, or fears.
Getting the right care and support
after a traumatic experience can help
these symptoms run their course and
subside in a few days or weeks and
allow a person to move on.
But PTSD is different. When
someone has PTSD, the symptoms
of stress are intense and last for
To experience PTSD you do not need to be
the person who was hurt in the experience.
PTSD may even be triggered by watching
something scary on television. People
usually feeling a strong sense of fear, fright
or helplessness. For example, after the
event of 9/11, it was found that a lot of
people developed PTSD symptoms.

After going through a traumatic event, it is
normal to feel super stressed. This means
you may have strong emotions like
sadness, fear, you may feel jittery, have an
abnormal sleeping and eating habit or you
may feel that it is difficult to concentrate on
work or particular activities. People who
experience PTSD usually have a lot of
images or thoughts about what happened.
This may take place in the form of
nightmares too. PTSD is treatable if you can
get the right support and care. It will allow
the symptoms to subside in a week days or
weeks allowing the person to move on with
their normal life.

PTSD is different for everyone. When
someone experiences PTSD the stress may
be more intense and last for more than a
month. After a traumatic event takes place,
longer than a month. For some
people, the symptoms of PTSD
begin soon after the trauma, but
others have a delayed response.
Signs of PTSD include:
Bad dreams
Flashbacks, or feeling like the
scary event is happening again
Scary thoughts you can't control
Staying away from places and
things that remind you of what
happened
Feeling worried, guilty, or sad
Feeling alone
Trouble sleeping
Feeling on edge
Angry outbursts
Thoughts of hurting yourself or
others
PTSD can be treated. A doctor or
mental health professional who has
experience in treating people with
PTSD can help you. Treatment may
include "talk" therapy, medication, or
people way experience PTSD straight away
or have a delayed response depending on
how your body and brain reacts.

Below are a few signs of PTSD:
Constantly feeling sad, guilty or
worried.
Feeling alone and isolated.
Lash out and have outburst of anger.
Nightmares
Flashbacks about what happened,
having bad images in your head.
Feeling like the traumatic event is
taking place again.
Thoughts of hurting others around
you or yourself.
Feeling on edge.
Staying away from people or places
that remind you of the event that
took place.
PTSD can be treated by a doctor or mental
health professional who has had previous
experience and education in treating
people who have had PTSD. Treatment
may include simply talking to them,
particular medication or a combination of
both.
both.

15/8/14 Some ways you can
handle PTSD
Whether or not you were directly
affected by a traumatic event, it is
normal to feel nervous about your own
safety and wonder how you would
react in an emergency.
Here are some things you can do to
handle this special kind of stress:
Be honest about your
feelings. You may think it feels
better to pretend the event did not
happen, but it is best to be honest
about how you are feeling.
Ignoring or hiding your feelings
can be worse for your health in
the long run. It is okay to feel
scared and uncertain.
Remember that things will get
better. Try to remember that,
while you might feel like a
changed person and everything
seems off balance right now, your
life will calm down and you will
find a new normal groove.
Release your emotions by
You may be both directly or indirectly
affected by a traumatic event that took
place in your life but it is normal to feel
concerned and anxious about your own
safety and think about how you would
react in an emergency situation.

Here are some tips on what you can do to
handle this amount of stress:

Always remember that things will get
better and you will work and most
past this point in your life.
Remember that you may feel
different as a person because of
what has happened, you may feel
lost and things may be completely
off balance in your life. Know that
things will fall into place and life
will calm down and you will a
normal routine again.
Be honest about what you are feeling.
It may seem like a better option to
pretend that these particular events
did not take place but that will lead
to bottling up a lot of emotions

talking them out. Talk to a
teacher, your parents, or a
counselor about your sadness,
anger, and other emotions. It can
be tough to get started, but it is
important to confide in someone
you trust with your thoughts and
feelings.
Keep calm by listening to music,
praying, or meditating. It is
common to want to strike back at
people who have caused you or
those you love great pain. This
feeling is normal, but it is
important to understand that it is
useless to respond with more
violence. Nothing good can come
from using hateful words or
actions.
Look inside yourself to find
strength. While you will always
remember and feel changed by
the event, the feelings will
become less painful over time. In
learning to cope with tragedy, you
will become stronger and better at
handling stressful situations. You
may also find yourself
appreciating life and the people
which will explode. It is much better
to be honest about your feelings and
not hide or ignore your feelings.
Know that it is completely okay to
feel anxious, scared and confused. If
you are able to accept these
emotions it will help a lot in the long
run.
Keep calm by meditation, praying or
listening to music. Once you go
through a traumatic event it is
normal to feel the need or want to
strike back at people who have
caused you pain or people close to
your pain. Try to understand that by
responding back with violence is
useless and will not help. There is
nothing good that can come with
being hurtful with words and
actions.
Release your emotions by talking it
out. You can reach out to a trusted
adult like your parents/guardians,
counselors or teachers about your
emotions. It may be hard to find the
courage to go up and talk to them
about it and to trust and confide in
someone with your thoughts and
feelings. Although, it will help in the
you love even more.

longer term. You should not have to
go through or experience a
traumatic event alone.
Look inside yourself to find strength
to keep you going. Even though the
event will most likely cause a lasting
effect on you know that the feelings
will become less painful over time.
By having to cope with the situation
that occurred you will become a
much stronger individual and you
will find that you will become better
at handling stressful situations. You
could even end up appreciating and
wanting to spend more time with
your loved ones even more.
17/8/14 Feeling suicidal
Why do some teens
think about
suicide?
Thinking about suicide often
goes along with stressful
events and feeling sad. Some
teens feel so overwhelmed
and sad that they think they
will never feel better. Some
things that can cause these
feelings include: Death of a
loved one
Seeing a lot of anger and violence
at home
Having parents get divorced
Suicide is an option for some teenagers
because once youre in a stressful situation
or if you are sad, its easy to feel
overwhelmed and believe that things will
never get better. Some events that can
trigger this include the death of a loved one
or witnessing a lot of violence and anger.
Having to see your parents separate or go
through a divorce may also trigger strong
feelings or having a hard time coping in
school with both grades and social aspects.
It is a lot to handle which means that some
teens may turn to drugs and alcohol.

Having a hard time in school,
struggling with grades or having
problems with other teens
Depression or alcohol or drug
problems
Anger or heart-break over a
relationship break-up
Feeling like you don't belong,
either within the family or with
friends
Feeling left out or alone
Sometimes, teens may feel very
sad for no one clear reason. Every
teen feels anxiety and confusion at
some point, but it helps to get
through tough times by turning to
people you trust and love. If you
don't think you have people like
this in your life, talk to a school
counselor, teacher, doctor, or
another adult who can help you
talk about your feelings. There are
ways to help teens deal with these
intense feelings and work on
feeling better in the future.
Going through a break up or heart break
may also make you feel like you have lost a
lot and no longer know your purpose or
whats important. You may feel isolated
from the people you love such as family or
friends.

To feel sad, teenagers may not have on
clear reason but every teen feels confused,
sad and anxious at different points. In
order to move past dark times, it is
important to reach out to people willing to
help you that love you. If you feel like you
dont know who to talk to there are always
counselors, teachers and doctors that
would be more than willing to help.
Remember that you are not alone and
never have to go through dark times alone.

18/8/14 How common is the
problem of teen
suicide?
Suicide is one of the leading
causes of death for teens. Girls try
to commit suicide more often than
boys. The important thing for you
to know is that it doesn't have to
happen. It is also important to
know that suicide is not a heroic
act, even though sometimes media
images can make it seem so.
Often, a person who is thinking
about attempting suicide isn't able
to see that suicide is never the
answer to problems. Remember,
there is always help out there
as well as support and love for
you or a friend.


Among teenagers right now, suicide is one
of the leading causes of death. The
important thing you should remember is
that killing yourself is not a heroic act even
though media often makes it seem like it is.
There is nothing to romanticize when it
comes to hurting yourself. The problem
with suicide is that the person that goes
through with it is not able to witness that
suicide is not the answer to your problems
but it will hurt and change lives of those
around you. Know that there are always
other ways to let things out and killing
yourself should not be an option.

18/8/14 How can you help a
friend?
If you have a friend or friends who have
talked about suicide, take it seriously. The
first thing you should do is to tell an adult
you trust right away. You may wonder
if your friend(s) will be mad at you, but
telling an adult is the right thing to do.
This can be someone in your family, a
coach, a school nurse, counselor, or a
Suicide is an extremely important issue,
therefore if you know anyone who has
talked and considered suicide, take it
seriously. The first step to dealing with this
is telling an adult who is able to help you
straight away, this will help to take
pressure off from you to deal with the
situation alone. This may be a tough

teacher. You can call 911 or the toll-free
number of a suicide crisis line. You can't
help your friend(s) alone. They will need a
good support system, including friends,
family, teachers, and professional help.
Suggest that they should talk with a
trusted adult. Offer to listen and
encourage them to talk about their
feelings. Don't ignore their worries or tell
them they will get better on their own.
Listening shows that you take your
friend(s) and their problems seriously and
that you are there to help. If someone is
in danger of hurting himself or herself,
do not leave the person alone. You
may need to call 911.

decision because your friend may get mad
at you, but it is always the best thing to do
in the long term. If not, you can call a
suicide hotline. It is very hard to talk a
person out of suicide once they set their
minds to it and both ways will need a good,
healthy support system. The support
system will most likely include other
friends, family and professional help. Be
there for them and listen to them, try
getting them to open up so they do not
have to keep their feelings hidden.
Listening and being there is a reminder for
them that they have someone that cares
about them and that they matter.
19/8/14 What if you are
having suicidal
thoughts?
If you feel suicidal, talk to an adult
right away. Call 911 or 1-800-
SUICIDE, or check in your phone
book for the number of a suicide crisis
center. The centers offer experts who
can help callers talk through their
problems and develop a plan of
action. These hotlines can also tell
you where to go for more help in
person.
Things may seem bad at times, but
If you are having suicidal thoughts or
considering it as an option, please gather
the strength and courage to talk to an adult
and get help straight away. You deserve to
live and see your life gets better. Experts
and counselors will be ale to talk through
your problems and find plans and ways to
pass the hurdle in front of you. Experts will
be able to guide you and recommend other
people you can go to for more help and
support.

those times don't last forever. Your
pain right now probably feels like it is
too overwhelming to cope with
suicide may feel like the only form of
relief. But remember that people do
make it through suicidal thoughts. Ask
for help you can feel better. Don't
use alcohol or drugs, because they
cant take your problems away. If you
can't find someone to talk with, write
down your thoughts. Try to remember
and write down the things you are
grateful for. List the people who are
your friends and family, and care for
you. Write about your hopes for the
future. Read what you have written
when you need to remind yourself that
your life is IMPORTANT!
There is no reason that you or a friend
has to continue hurting. There are
ways to find help and hope.

Although things in your life may seem like
a mess and that things are falling apart,
remember that these rough patches wont
last forever. You may feel overwhelmed to
the point that the only way you want to
cope with your life is to commit suicide for
relief and as an escape. It is important that
you know that you can feel better and you
will be able to reach a better place in your
life. Turn to healthy ways to let things out
through art, writing or even music rather
than drugs or alcohol. Drugs and alcohol
will only give you temporary relief and will
leave you with more consequences. Before
sleeping or when you wake up, list and
think about things that you are thankful
and happy to have in your life. These things
can be both people and events that took
place. Write goals and what you want to
hope for the future. This will keep you
motivated and remind you that there is
always a future and your life is important.
20/8/14 What if someone
you know attempts
or dies by suicide?
If someone you know attempts or dies by
suicide, it's important to remember that it
isn't your fault. You may feel many
different emotions: anger, grief, guilt, or
you may even feel numb. All of your
The first thing to remember when someone
attempts or passes away due to suicide,
know that it is not your fault and you
should not beat yourself up or put yourself
to be blamed for the situation. It is easy to

feelings are okay; there is not a right or
wrong way to feel. If you are having
trouble dealing with your feelings, talk to
a trusted adult or use the contact
information below. It is important that you
feel strong ties with people at this time.

get caught up and pick out flaws and over
think the situation but take a step back and
know that you are not the reason. All the
feelings you could be feeling may be
extremely overwhelming. A way to deal
with this is to talk to a trusted adult of find
a hotline or profession to help you. It is
important to have people you love and
people you can trust during this period of
time in your life.
20/8/14 Feeling anxious or
worried
Anxiety is a normal reaction to stress.
It can help you cope with a hard
situation. For example, anxiety helps
push you to study for a test or can
give you a boost when youre on stage
in front of the whole school. But when
anxiety becomes a strong dread of
everyday situations, it can be harmful.
People with anxiety disorders feel very
fearful and unsure. Most people feel
anxious about something for a short
time now and again, but people with
anxiety disorders feel this way most of
the time. Their fears and worries make
it hard for them to do everyday tasks.
About 18 percent of American adults
have anxiety disorders. Children and
teens also may have them.
Anxiety is a feeling you have when you feel
overwhelmed or stress. Some pros of
anxiety is that it pushes you to work to
your full potential. An example of this is
when you need to make a speech in front of
a lot of people, it can motivate you to do
better and practice more. However there is
a line between a healthy amount of anxiety
and too much. If you begin to get anxiety
when it comes to everyday situations it can
be bad for your mental health.

Having anxiety illness can make you over
think a lot of situations causing you to feel
scared or unsure of what you are doing.
The fears and worries come in the way of
doing everyday things and sometimes the
person may need a lot of mental
preparation before doing something.

Children, adults and teens suffer from
anxiety.
20/8/14 Social phobia Social phobia is a kind of anxiety. It is
a strong fear of being judged by
others and of being embarrassed.
This fear can be so strong that it gets
in the way of going to work or school
or doing other everyday things.
People with social phobia are afraid of
doing common things in front of other
people. For example, they might be
afraid to eat or drink in front of other
people. All of us have been a little bit
nervous, at one time or another, about
things like meeting new people or
giving a speech. But people with
social phobia worry about these and
other things for weeks before they
happen.
Most of the people who have social
phobia know that they shouldn't be as
afraid as they are, but they can't
control their fear. Sometimes, they
end up staying away from places or
events where they think they might
have to do something that will
embarrass them. That can keep them
from doing the everyday tasks of living
A particular type of anxiety is social phobia.
Social phobia is the fear of being
embarrassed or judged by others. This fear
can be so extreme that it stops being from
doing daily activities or stop them from
going to school or even work. This is due to
a n extreme amount of over thinking and
making up situation about what could go
wrong.

An example of what people with social
phobia may be scared to due include eating
or drinking in front of other people. They
make feel nervous and being to sweat or
get butterflies in their stomach. Meeting
new people or having to present in front of
a lot of people are things that could worry
people suffering` from social phobia. They
will most likely think about these
situations a long time before they happen.

People who suffer from social phobia are
aware that they should not be so afraid
about these activities and things that they
worry about but they are not able to
control their fear. Usually this leads to
them purposely excluding themselves

and from enjoying times with family
and friends. If social phobia is getting
in the way of you enjoying life, talk to
a doctor or nurse. It can be treated
with talk therapy and/or medicine.
There are some positive things about
social phobia, too. People with social
phobia may be really great at writing
or using computers. Also, people with
social phobia are often good at
judging other peoples actions.
People with social phobia:
Are very anxious about being with
other people
Are very self-conscious in front of
other people (they are very
worried about how they will act)
Are very afraid of being
embarrassed in front of other
people
Are very afraid that other people
will judge them
Worry for days or weeks before an
event where other people will be
Stay away from places where
when they feel like they might be in a
situation where they could embarrass
themselves or in a situation that something
could go wrong. Social phobia can be
treated through medication or taking to a
doctor, nurse or through talk therapy.

On the other hand, having social phobia can
help improve skills such as writing and
usually stop them from judging other
peoples actions.

People with social phobia:
Are very self conscious and are
always aware of what they are
doing.
Anxious being around people and
usually prefers to be alone instead.
Are afraid that other people will
judge them and talk about it.
Worry about an event-taking place
long before it does. Some people
may lose sleep over this.
Have a hard time keeping
sustainable, strong friendships.
May have physical symptoms such
as heavy sweating, blushing,
stuttering or trembling.
there are other people
Have a hard time making friends
and keeping friends
May have body symptoms when
they are with other people, such
as:
o Blushing
o Heavy sweating
o Trembling
o Nausea
o Having a hard time talking

20/8/14 When does social
phobia start?
Social phobia usually starts during
the child or teen years, usually at
about age 13. Symptoms last at
least 6 months. Anxiety can be
treated with medicine and talk
therapy. Many people feel much
better with treatment.


Social phobia is common during child or
teen years. The average age is about 13.
Anxiety can be treated by talking therapy
and medication. This will usually make
them feel a lot better and less alone.

20/8/14 How can you tell
your parents you
It takes courage to tell your
parents that you are feeling
It may be hard to admit to having anxiety
or depression to your parents but know

feel anxious? anxious or depressed. But
remember your parents can find
you the help you may need to get
through tough times.
The best way to get a conversation
started is to find a time when you
are together and not distracted.
Driving in the car may be a good
time, or maybe after dinner. If you
have younger siblings, wait until
they are put in bed so you can
have your mom or dads full
attention. You may even need to
schedule a time. Try saying, Mom
and Dad, I have something Id like
to talk about. I think I am feeling
anxious (or depressed). Can we sit
and talk after dinner?
If you dont feel comfortable talking
to your mom or dad about feeling
anxious or depressed, you could
also try writing a letter. You could
even send an email. Sometimes it
is easier to get the words out when
you write them down.

that they are able to find you help and will
support you through tough and hard times.

The best way to bring it up is when your
family is together and are all focused to the
topic at hand. A good time is after dinner
where everybody is free and together. If
you have a younger brother or sister it may
not be a good choice to talk about it while
they are there because it could distract
your parents and they ma ask questions
about what is going on. You could also set
up a time or mention it along the lines of I
have something that has been on my mind
and I would really like it if you could take
some time to listen to me.

If you do not have a healthy relationship
with your parents and you find it difficult
to talk about feeling anxious or depressed
you can always turn to writing a letter or
even sending an email to them. You may
find it easier to put your thoughts into
words rather than a speech.

21/8/14 Running away Are you afraid that a friend of
yours might run away?
Are you thinking about running
away?
One in 7 kids between the ages of
10 and 18 will run away at some
point. And there are 1 million to 3
million runaway and homeless kids
living on the streets in the United
States. Many of these runaways
are teens under the age of 18 who
leave their home or place of legal
residence without the permission
of parents or a legal guardian.
They come from every social
class, race, and religion. And they
are usually hungry, scared,
desperate, and at high risk of
turning to crime.
If you think your friend is about to
run away, ask her or him these
questions:

What else can you do to improve
Running away is a common thought that
runs through a lot of teenager minds. There
about one to three million runaway and
homeless kids in the United States having
to live along roads and streets. A lot of
teenagers leave their legal guardian
without permission. As a runaway
teenagers are usually feeling scared,
hungry and have a large chance of turning
to crime in order to have basic necessities
and needs.

To help talk someone out of running away
try bringing up these questions with them:

Is there anything you can change at
home to improve the situation? Is
there a certain way you can act or
say to bring everyone together?
How will you be dependent on
yourself?
Is it a realistic idea or will you get
yourself into more trouble and end
up feeling worse than you are
feeling now.
Have you spent enough time
thinking it through knowing that

your home situation before you
leave?
What would make you stay at
home?
How will you survive?
What will you do for money?
Is running away safe?
Who can you count on for help?
Are you being realistic?
Have you given this enough
thought?
What are your other options?
If you end up in trouble, who will
you call?
When you return home, what will
happen?
The most common reasons that
teens run away are family
problems over such issues as:
curfew, behavior, dress code,
grades, and the choice of friends.
Teens also may choose to run
away because of problems they
are afraid to face, such as bullying
at school, pregnancy, sexual
you can go through the idea and
have no regrets?
Who can you depend on to help you
and take you in if you need help?
How will you earn money without
stealing or committing crimes?
Who will support you?
When you go back home do you
think the situation will get worse?
Will your parents be disappointed
and very angry?

Common reasons why teenagers think
about running away are usually family
problems such as behavior, strong
points of views or opinions, dress code,
academic issues or even choice of
friends. Teenagers also may runaway to
escape and avoid problems such as
sexuality, pregnancy, bullying or people
they are afraid to see face to face.
Falling into drugs and alcohol problems
may also be a pushing force behind
wanting to runaway.





orientation, or alcohol and drug
problems.
There are a number of teens that
may choose life on the street
because of emotional, physical,
and sexual abuse in their home.
The nature of ANY kind of abuse
the shame your friend may
have, and the possible
involvement of parents,
stepparents, or other family
members may make it
extremely difficult for your friend to
tell. This is not a time for your
friend to run away!
Encourage your friend to tell a
teacher, counselor, babysitter,
neighbor, clergy person, or your
parents. Offer to go along with
your friend to give her or him
support. Let your friend know that
being abused is not her or his fault.
Be clear to your friend nothing
about what they say, the way they
look, or how they behave gives
ANYONE the right to use or hurt
them! You can learn more about
abuse in the Relationships section

If physical, emotional or sexual abuse
takes place at home it is a large reason
behind why teenagers leave home. If
you are aware that your friend is going
through anything like this, understand
that it is an extremely difficult topic to
bring up and discuss, as it is very
personal and could lead to many
problems. However try to explain to
them that this is not a time to run away
but a time to get help instead.
If it is possible try encouraging them to
approach a counselor, teacher or your
own parents or any other trusted adult
they are comfortable around. Offer to
help them through the problems
including going with them to talk about
it or find help. Be clear with them that
whatever situation they are going
through is not their fault whatsoever.
Make sure that it is in their head that
nobody has the right to ever hurt or use
them.


of girlshealth.gov.


22/8/14 Signs that your
friend may
runaway
She or he has sudden and
dramatic mood swings that affect
eating and interest in hanging out
with friends.
Her or his school grades,
attendance, and behavior
suddenly drop.
She or he suddenly starts carrying
large amounts of money and even
asks you to keep some of it.
She or he gives away clothing and
other valuable items.
She or he starts talking to you
about running away. Do you think
anyone would miss me if I leave
home? (Take these statements
seriously!)

Academic performance decreases
along with behavior leading to
getting in trouble more often.
He/she may not attend school.
Brings up the topic of running away
saying things alone the lines of I
dont think not being home with
make any difference.
Starts carrying around or saving up
a lot of money without having a
purpose.
Has a lot of sudden mood swings
which impact eating, sleeping habits
and may isolate them.
Gives away clothes or items where
they are able to earn extra money.

24/8/14 Healthy eating for
teens//getting
A healthy diet can help you look and
feel great. Don't follow the latest food
Maintaining a healthy diet is very
important in having a balanced lifestyle
http://www.nhs.uk/
Livewell/Goodfood/
started
fad: find out the truth about eating
well.
Your body needs energy and nutrients
from food to grow and work properly. If
you don't eat a healthy, balanced diet,
you could be putting your health and
growth at risk.
A healthy diet also gives you the energy
you need and can help you look and feel
great. But eating well doesn't have to
mean giving up all your favourite foods. A
healthy diet means eating a wide range of
foods so that you get all the nutrients you
need, and eating the right number of
calories for how active you are.
Beware of fad diets: they're rarely the
best way to reach a healthy weight.
Instead, use our tips to help you eat more
healthily.

because it can help make you look and feel
great. It is important that your body
receives all the energy and nutrients it
needs in order to work to its full potential
and grow properly.
Following a healthy diet plan will give you
energy to go through the day looking great
and fresh. Having a good diet does not
necessarily mean that you have to cut out
all of your favorite foods from your diet.
Having a healthy diet means that you have
the range of foods that provide all the
nutrients you need and calories depending
on how active you are during the day.
Pages/healthy-
eating-teens.aspx
24/8/14 Tips
Don't skip breakfast. Some
people skip breakfast because
they think it will help them lose
weight. But skipping meals doesn't
Dont miss your breakfast. Some
people have the idea that by
skipping breakfast it will help them
lose weight but skipping meals is

help you lose weight and is not
good for you, because you can
miss out on essential nutrients.
Research shows that eating
breakfast can actually help people
control their weight. In addition, a
healthy breakfast is an important
part of a balanced diet and
provides some of the vitamins and
minerals we need for good health.
Whole grain cereal with fruit sliced
over the top is a tasty and healthy
start to the day.
Aim to eat at least five portions
of a variety of fruits and
vegetables a day. They are good
sources of many of the vitamins
and minerals your body needs. It's
not as hard as it might sound:
fresh, frozen, tinned, dried and
juiced fruit and vegetables all
count towards your total. So fruit
juice, smoothies and vegetables
baked into dishes such as stews
not a way to lose weight and neither
is it healthy for you. It can lead to
missing out on essential nutrients.
Eating breakfast has been proven to
control your weight and breakfast
provides a lot of vitamins and
minerals that are needed for good
health. An example of a healthy
breakfast meal that will keep you
going throughout the day includes
whole grain cereal with sliced fruit
or berries. This is a yummy and
healthy way to start your day fresh.
Try to have at least five portions of
vegetables and fruits in the span of
one day. Fruits and vegetables are
sources of essential vitamin and
minerals that your body needs in
order to stay healthy. Although five
portions seem like a lot, you can
have fresh, thinned, dried, frozen or
fresh fruit. Fruit juices, smoothies
can also be counted in the five
portions. This will supply your body
with a lot of good nutrients.




all count. Learn more at Why 5 A
DAY?
At snack time, swap foods that
are high in saturated fat or
sugars for healthier choices.
Foods high in saturated fat include
pies, processed meats such as
sausages and bacon, biscuits and
crisps. Foods high in
added sugars include cakes and
pastries, sweets, and chocolate.
Both saturated fat and sugar are
high in calories, so if you eat these
foods often you're more likely to
become overweight. Too much
saturated fat can also cause high
cholesterol. Learn more in Eat less
saturated fat.
Make sure you drink enough
fluids. Aim to drink six to eight
glasses of fluids a day: water,
unsweetened fruit juices (diluted
with water) and milk are all healthy
choices.


When you are going to have a snack
choose something healthier rather
than foods that are high in saturated
fat. Examples of food that are high in
saturated fat include bacon, chips,
French fries, sausages, chocolate,
cake and pastries. If you snack on
these foods often, there is a larger
chance that you will become
overweight. Having a lot of
unhealthy snacks may cause an
increases in cholesterol.
Drink enough liquid throughout the
day. It is recommended to drink at
least six to eight glasses of fluid each
day. Fluid as in water, milk or
natural fruit juices that are not
sweetened.

24/8/14 Important food
facts
~From book~
You are what you eat
-Dr Gillian McKeith
You have an increases risk of
coronary heart disease if your diet is
high in fat and/or salt.
Not having enough calcium may
lead to a condition known as
osteoporosis. This is when your
bones become brittle or weak.
Scientific evidence has shown that
on average one third of cancers
could have been prevented by a
change in diet. Cancers that could be
prevented include stomach, colon
and breast cancer. You would need
to have a diet that is high in fiber
and low in fat.
Not having enough nutrients puts a
strain on the liver. The liver is
important as it absorbs all the
essential minerals and vitamins that
the body needs to function. For good
health it is important to keep your
liver in good shape. It is hard for the
liver to cope with a large quantity of
fat and alcohol. This can lead to
cirrhosis, which is a life threatening
disease that causes the cells of the
liver to die.
By having an unhealthy diet, it has

been shown that it can increase the
risk of miscarriage. An unhealthy
diet in this case includes a diet that
is high in sugar, processed foods
and fat.
It has been shown that an unhealthy
diet has a relationship with PMS,
food cravings, mood sings,
depression and anxiety.
Having an unhealthy diet can
increase the risk of obesity and
extreme weight gain. This is related
to low self-esteem, low self-
confidence, poor mental health,
poor physical permofance and
fatigue.
Having too much sugar in your diet
can lead to too much glucose.
Glucose if sugar that is carried in
your bloodstream which circulates
the body. This can lead to blood
sugar problems such as diabetes.
This also affects vision and fatigue.
Having too much refined sugar and
added preservatives in your diet can
lead to poor concentration, no focus
and aggression. This is because
foods that are high in sugar lack
chromium. Chromium helps to
control sugar levels and when sugar
levels are not in control it can lead
to behavioral problems.
Not having the right diet can also
affect your immune system making
it easier to catch colds or the flu. To
keep your immune system working
properly, it requires essential
vitamins and minerals. This helps to
keep our bodies from being prone to
infections and diseases.
24/8/14 Truth about what is
in our food

Nachos (6 nacho chips with sour
cream chili, chees and guacamole)
-Protein 29 g
-Calories 674
-Carbs 42 g
-Fat 44g
-Fiber 2.5 g
Equivalent to 1/3 stick of butter and
7 and teaspoons of sugar.
8 chocolate chip cookies
-Protein 7.6 g
-Calories 636
-Carbs 76 g
-Fat 33 g
-Fiber 4.4 g
Equivalent to approximately 3/8 of
a stick of butter and 15 teaspoons of
sugar.



Spaghetti (300 g serving)
-Calories 237
-Carbs 32 g
-Fat 5.7 g
-Fiber 3g
Equivalent to 6 teaspoons of sugar
Hot dog meal (1 hot dog + bun +
large coke + large fries + ketchup)
-Protein 18 g
-Calories 1103
-Carbs 175 g
-Fat 35.6 g
-Fiber 8g
Equivalent to 2/5 stick of butter and
35 teaspoons of sugar.