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Effective Communication


Good communication does not mean that you have to speak in perfectly
formed sentences and paragraphs. It isn't about slickness. Simple and
clear go a long way. ~ John Kotter

Effective communication is one of the prerequisites for any healthy
relationship, whether it is in the context of work or at home. In any
dialogue, the listener tends to believe that he/she understands what is
being said, but often we find that it is not necessarily the truth. Effective
communication can be defined as a process whereby the speaker
successfully puts across what he/she wants to tell the listener/s. This
does not have to be through verbal means alone; it can be done using
other modes of communication as well.

Myths associated with communication:

A few of the myths identified in the communication pattern of most
individuals are as follows:

1. We only communicate when we want to communicate.
2. Words mean the same to both the speaker and the listener.
3. We communicate chiefly with words.
4. Nonverbal communication is silent communication.
5. Communication is a one-way street.
6. The message we communicate is the message that the listener
receives.
7. There is no such thing as too much information.

Therefore keeping in mind the above myths, it is hardly surprising that
many of us find it difficult to maintain a healthy relationship with others.
So in order to have simple, yet effective bonds, we can begin by
introspecting and looking at what factors complicate the persons
communication pattern.

Types of communication:

Communication can be of two types- verbal and non-verbal. Verbal
communication, as the name suggests, is communication that happens
through spoken language. On the other hand, non-verbal communication
includes a variety of methods, such as eye contact, facial expressions,
body movements and posture, deliberate silence and so on.

In a study conducted to examine what type of communication is largely
used by most people in the United States of America, it was found that
93% of all communication is non-verbal.



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Barriers in communication:

Majority of people around the world prefer the latter mode of
communication, to the former. In addition, having accepted the fact that
several people have difficulties with effective communication; can we
infer from that the non-verbal method of communication is an ineffective
mode? Is this the actual problem? Well, research shows otherwise.

The most common factors that seem to come in the way of effective
communication are as follows:

1. Misinterpretation: When there is misunderstanding of what is
being said by either party, or the very intention behind which it
was said.
2. Defensiveness: If either the listener or the speaker becomes
defensive and gets offended, rather than treating what is being
said as constructive criticism that is helpful for own growth.
3. Inarticulateness: When one of the individuals participating in the
dialogue is unable to put into words what he/she is feeling, it gets
tough for the other/s to understand what is being said.
4. Hidden Agenda: If either the listener or the speaker has an agenda
that the other does not know or may be hurtful.
5. Status: When there is a vast difference in status between the two
parties involved in the dialogue, the person/people in the lower
rung may be very hesitant in sharing their thoughts.
6. Environment: If something is being communicated in an
environment that is unfriendly or hostile, neither party benefits
and communication suffers.

How to communicate effectively?

Listening and speaking are perhaps the two most important skills
required by both the parties involved in the dialogue. Listening needs
skills like concentration, open-mindedness, analysis and understanding.
Speaking requires sharp focus, logical thinking, clear phrasing and crisp
delivery.

Some of the other crucial skills required for effective communication are
given below:
1. Be clear and specific about what you want to say.
2. Be calm and rational.
3. State what you will and will not do to avoid any confusion.
4. Do not be side-tracked.
5. Choose the time and place such that it is convenient for both
parties involved.
6. While explaining, give reasons, and not excuses because you are
not trying to prove the other wrong or yourself right.
7. Consider compromises during the dialogue, as it eases the other
person/people and makes the latter feel you care about him/them.

Behaviors that support effective listening are as follows:
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1. Maintaining a relaxed body posture.
2. Leaning slightly forward if sitting.
3. Facing the person/people squarely at eye level.
4. Maintaining an open posture.
5. Maintaining appropriate distance.

Advantages of effective communication

The benefits of effective communication include empowering the
individual to respond in a manner that he/she feels is appropriate, it
encourages assertiveness in people, enabling them to take their own
decisions about all aspects in life. Effective communication is
instrumental in enhancing self esteem, self confidence as well as problem
solving ability, as the individual has clarity in the way he/she thinks. All
these factors facilitate in leading a life which has little or no stress.
Finally, we tend to find that a person with effective communication skills
has greater acceptance of oneself and others, allowing him/her to be
happy with life.

Conclusion:

To conclude, it is essential to realize that effective communication is a
two-way street. Therefore, one has to be prepared to listen and observe
the speaker. More importantly, he/she has to keep an open mind so that
responses verbal or non-verbal are taken into consideration during the
course of the discussion.

Hot Tip!!!!!!!
The most important thing in communication is to hear what isn't being
said
















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Quiz Time!!!!!

As we saw earlier one of the most important parts of communication is effective listening. Often it is common for us
to talk more to put across our point but it need not be always. Even listening attentively and patiently is a pre
requisite for effective communication. Lets find out how effective a listener we are.

How well do you really listen? Take this short self-test. There are no "right or wrong" answers. But it might show you
some areas in which you could make improvements.
Please respond to the statements as thoughtfully, objectively, and honestly as you can. Score yourself on each
statement by checking one of the four numbers to the right. Interpret the numbers this way:

1. I need a great deal of improvement
2. I'm doing just "so-so" and could improve quite a bit
3. I'm doing pretty well, although there is room for some improvement
4. I'm doing exceptionally well

I frequently summarize or re-phrase what the other person
has said.
4 3 2 1
I keep my eyes on the speaker as much as I possibly can. 4 3 2 1
I concentrate on what the person is saying - not on the
person's appearance or style of presentation solely.
4 3 2 1
I hear the person out before I form judgments about the
message.
4 3 2 1
I frequently review and discuss my listening abilities and
skills with others.
4 3 2 1
When appropriate, I interject sensible questions to enhance
my understanding.
4 3 2 1
I let the other person finish his own sentences-even when
pauses seem quite lengthy.
4 3 2 1
I look like I'm listening when I am. 4 3 2 1
I really listen to all statements made, whether I like them
or not.
4 3 2 1
I can read between the lines and tell when there is a
hostile or highly emotionally charged atmosphere.
4 3 2 1


Youre Score now..

Once you have marked all the questions and added up the scores look below to see where you stand:

Below 10 Not at all good, a long way to go, need to do something NOW!!
11-20 Fair enough, maybe just good enough
21-30 Good, lots of scope for improvement can be very good
31-40 Excellent, doing exceptionally well!!
Mind Ur Language!!!!



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