SOC214: The Family Review for Exam 3

Chapter 9: Mate Selection

LECTURE (may also be in text)
1.

Cohabitation
a. Differences and similarities to marriage
i. similar to marriage:
1. emotional, physical, financial relationship
2. 40% include children
ii. different from marriage:
1. group level:
a. no legal contract (not a social institution)
b. no public commitment (less social pressure/acceptance; social pressure to
take the next step
2. individual level:
a. less guidelines, less clear social roles
b. more focused on personal autonomy
c. 50% are either uncertain about or uncommitted to relationship-less sharing of
resources
b. Casper & Sayer: Which types of cohabiting relationships are most common?
i. substitution for marriage (older) 10%
ii. precursor to marriage (engaged) (46%)
iii.trial marriage (15%)
iv. coresidential daters (29%)
c. Which are most likely to end?
i. trial marriage and coresidential daters
d. Pew Research on Millennials attitudes
*LESS RELIGIOUS->MORE POSITIVE ATTITUDES
i. % saying the cohabitation trend is:
1. 22% bad
2. 63% no difference
3. 14% good

ii. of the % that say living together without marriage is bad:

1. Republican: 33%
2. Democratic: 14%
iii.millennials whose parents were:
1. married: 27%
2. divorced or separated:15%
e. Reasons for increased cohabitation:
i. Age at first marriage:
1. older ideal age for marriage=more support for cohabitation without marital plans
ii. Cultural changes:
1. more permissive sexual standards
2. better access to contraceptiion
3. cost of living increases
4. womens education and work
5. increased concerns about divorce
f. Gallup Poll -- beliefs of 20-29 year olds about cohabitation
i. 62% agree that living together before marriage is a good way to avoid divorce
ii. 43% say they would only marry someone who agreed to live together first
g. Census Bureau data on probability of divorce for cohabitors versus non-cohabitors (2002)
+ conclusion about helpfulness of trial marriage
i. probability of marriage surviving 10 years:
1. no difference between marriage only and cohabit while engaged or have specific
plans to marry
2. declines slightly if cohabit first and not engaged, especially for men
ii. conclusion: less likely to hurt but doesnt help
h. Reasons why cohabitation does not lead to lower divorce rates
i. liberal attitudes towards relationships
ii. less religious
iii.relationship inertia: men: married because of cohabitation
iv. serial cohabitation: tolerance for unhappiness is diminished; a greater willingness to
dissolve later relationships

i. The economics of cohabitation and the transition to marriage:

i. how does education affect probability of cohabiting?
1. women:
a. not a college graduate: 1970 (83%); 2007 (56%)
b. college graduate: 1970 (82%); 2007 (69%)
2. men:
a. not a college graduate: 1970 (86%); 2007 (56%)
b. college graduate: 1970 (88%); 2007 (69%)
ii. What community variables decrease the probability that a cohabiting relationship will
become a marriage?
1. living in a community with:
a. a higher unemployment rate for men
b. lower median family income
c. higher percent of families below poverty
d. higher percent of households on public assistance
TEXT
1. What are the demographics of cohabitors, in other words who is more likely to cohabit?
cohabiting unions are more likely to be interracial than married couples for those in their

20s

rates of non-hispanic whites increasing at the fastest rate

african americans cohabit 3 times the rate of whites
Younger adults; majority of cohabitors are in their 20s,
Cohabitants are less likely to be religious and are more politically liberal and hold more
liberal attitudes about sex and other personal behaviors
Younger persons who are not attending college are more likely to cohabit
Persons whose mothers were young and pregnant at marriage
Those who fail to complete high school, by growing up in a family on welfare, and by
growing up in a single parent household
When the mans economic future is uncertain
African- Americans are 3 times likely to cohabit than whites

2.

Casper and Sayer study on p 241:

a. How do cohabitors view their relationships?

i. 10%: relationship is a substitution for marriage

ii. 46%: a precursor to marriage
iii.15%: a trial marriage
iv. 29%: least committed option-coresidential dating
b. Which relationships are more likely to end in marriage?
i. those who viewed it as a precursor to marriage

Chapter 10: Varieties of Sexual Scripts (discussed during chapter 9 lecture)

LECTURE
1. Gallup Poll: How have attitudes towards pre-marital sexuality changed over time?
(Do you think it is wrong for a man and woman to have sex before they are married?)
1969: Yes- 68%, no- 21%, No opinion- 11%
1973: Yes- 47%, No- 43%, No opinion- 9%
2001: Yes- 38%, No- 60%, No opinion- 2%
2.

How does age affect whether or not one has had vaginal intercourse?

-The older the age, the more likely a person has had vaginal intercourse
3.

Facts on teen sexuality: what do we know about teen sexual behavior, e.g. sex before age
15, sex within love relationships?
1. Teens are waiting longer to have sex. 2006-2008 14% of females and 11% of males had
had sex before age 15.
2. 70% of females and 56% of males: first sexual experience was with a steady partner
3. 16% of females and 28% of males report first having sex with someone they just met
or was just a friend.

4.

Hooking up: why are young women likely to hook-up rather than commit to a
relationship?

*because relationships can be greedy and guys can be disrespectful and have less
satisfaction
5.

What is the relational double bind?

* Being in a relationship versus being independent hooked-up instead of relationship

6.

How does the double standard affect women who hook-up?

* Guys can be disrespectful and there is less satisfaction

TEXT: pp265
1. What affect do parents have on teen sexual behavior?
parent presence makes a difference
the more teens and parents see of each other, and the closer their relationship in general,
the more restricted will be the sexual behavior of the teens
adolescents who are not living with both of their biological parents are likely to become
sexually active at younger ages than children in intact families
an intact family unit, especially one that is close-knit, seems to have a conservative
influence on sexual behavior

Chapter 12: Negotiating Marriages

LECTURE
1.

Graph: changes in age at marriage,

a. age dropped to early 20s in the 60s and rose significantly to 27 in 1996 (age is higher for
men

2.

4 characteristics of marriage as an institution.

a. social institution: defined by a legal contract specifying rights and responsibilities
b. social roles or guidelines
i.

facilitate interaction between spouses

ii. spontaneous consensus

c. social support
i.

group: connect partners to larger social networks

ii. couple: provide intimacy, companionship

d. public commitment
i.

group: enforceable trust: support from family, friends, community

ii. couple: change and reinforce expectations of couple

3.

What is spontaneous consensus?

a. Agreement arrived at without consideration by the parties involved, based on commonly
help assumptions that are often derived from tradition

4.

What is "enforceable trust"?

a. support from family, friends, community

5.

How is marriage becoming deinstitutionalized?

a. line is blurring between types of relationships
i.

division of labor is less rigid in marriage-negotiation

ii. marriage more likely to be viewed as a choice or temporary

iii. behaviors once unique to marriage are now less so:
1. sexual relationships
2. unmarried corresidence
3. unmarried child bearing
6.

What do couples want most from a marital relationship?

a. lifelong relationship
b. economic cooperation
c. childrearing and parenting
d. emotional intimacy and personal growth

7.

What do Gallup Poll -- what is the characteristic most sought after in a potential mate?
a. 94% of never-married 20-29 year olds want spouse to primarily be soul matessurpassing matters of religion, economics, and the ability to be a good mother or father
b. 80% of women feel that a husband who can communicate about his deepest feelings is
more desirable than a good living
c. only 16% have main purpose of having children

8.

What is a "super relationship"?

a. an intensely private spiritualized union, combining sexual fidelity, romantic love,
emotional intimacy and togetherness

9.

How is marriage viewed as a capstone experience?

a. 82% agreed it is important to be economically set before marrying

10.

How have the characteristics of a good marriage changed historically? (institutional,

companionship, individualized)?
a. institutional: utilitarian
i.

male authority

ii. duty to family

iii. conformity to social norms-roles well defined
iv. economics basis-production unit
v. sexuality focused on procreation
b. companionship: utilitarian/intrinsic
i.

affection and friendship

ii. sexual gratification

iii. separate spheres-specialization model
iv. focus on being spouse and parent
c. individualized: intrinsic
i.

romantic/passionate love

ii. open communication

iii. equality
iv. flexible roles-income pooling model
v. self development- me marriage
1. (+) less restrictive, open to change, more intimacy
2. (-) more likely to leave
11.

From text, 10 family roles that are part of the marital script.
a. provider
b. housekeeper
c. child care
d. child socialization
e. sexual
f.

therapeutic

g. recreation
h. kinship

12.

i.

friendship

j.

religious

What are the secret contracts or tacit agreements that couples begin to make during
courtship?

a. based on idealized view and must be renegotiated as relationship continues

13.

What are these contracts often based on?

a. social script and personal experience

14.

What are the three stages of the stage model of relationships? What are the
characteristics of each stage?
a. expansion stage
i.

romance/sexual electricity

ii. reach out for connection and support, share feelings, perspectives
iii. feelings of creating a common vision, supporting each other's dreams, accepting each
other unconditionally
1. rose colored glasses idealized version of partner
2. everyone can have what they want
iv. Ive found my soul mate!!
b. contraction stage
i.

conflict is inevitable (over life course of relationship)

ii. differences in expectations and needs emerge that can not be overlooked
especially when roles are not clear cut
iii. disillusionment->feeling the other is inflexible or that you have been deceived or they
changed
iv. focus on negative behaviors as deliberate and provoking
v. negative feedback cycle: try to change other who gets defensive->power struggle,
withdrawal
vi. Youre not my soul mate!!
c. resolution stage
i.

see partners point of view

ii. start to see compromise as not "giving in" or "giving up no whatevers

iii. negotiate realistically
iv. agree to disagree
v. Soul mates are made not found.
15.

How is the ideal of romantic love different from the expectation of commitment?
a. romantic love
i. idealized
ii. self focused

iii.sexual attraction
1. =NO WORK
b. commitment
i. expectation that relationship will grow, be strong, and last
ii. engage in Relationship Maintenance Behaviors (p.326)
1. Positivity
2. Openness (communication)
3. Assurances (commitment)
4. Network (common family/friends)
5. Sharing Tasks

TEXT
1.

What is the function of a wedding?

a. it finalizes a type of contract between both the bride and the groom and among the
members of the extended family and entire community
b. all agree to change their role expectations in accord with the socially acceptable meanings
associated with marriage

2.

What is spontaneous consensus?

a. agreement arrived at without consideration by the parties involved, based on commonly
held assumptions that are often derived from tradition

3.

How are couples moving away from spontaneous consensus?

a. there is a movement away toward the right hand side of the gender role continuum, wives
and husbands increasingly negotiate their decisions. the gender role distinctions are
increasingly blurred and unclear

4.

What are the characteristics of the 10 family roles that couples must consider in scripting
their marriage (figure 12.2)?
a. housekeeper: includes both management and task aspects of running a household, from
meal planning and deciding on cleanliness standards to doing laundry and tidying the
house
b. provider: focuses on supplying the money and material goods necessary to support the
family
c. sexual: involves satisfaction of the sexual wants of the couple

d. kinship: the kin-keeper role maintains the place of the couples nuclear family in a
network of extended families
e. recreational: involves the leisure activities of the couple
f. therapeutic: deals with emotional and instrumental needs of the couple, providing
sympathy, understanding, and advice
g. child-care: primarily involved with the physical care of children, including feeding,
bathing, and protecting infants and young children
h. child-socialization: involves the responsibility of instilling the values, attitudes, skills, and
behaviors required by the children for success in society at large
i. *religious: includes the responsibility for formal and informal religious practices
j. *friendship: locates the couple in a network of extra-familial social relationships
5.

What are the secret contracts or tacit agreements that couples begin to make during
courtship?
i. about how the couple would behave during marriage and how they would expect their
partner to behave
b. What are these contacts often based on?
i. are often based on idealized images of each other and of marriage itself

6.

What is an intrinsic marriage?

a. exist for the love and intimacy they provide to the partners
b. marriages with the why of maintaining the intimacy of the relationship between
husband and wife

7.

What are the characteristics of the two types of intrinsic marriages?

a. vital:
i. full of life
ii. the recreational script includes considerable joint activity, but it is the togetherness
rather than the activity itself that provides the pleasure
iii.genuine sharing and excitement in their relationship supplies the central meaning in
life for both of them
iv. similarities rather than differences between the two are emphasized, and when
conflict does occur it tends to be settled quickly and without lasting racor
b. total:
i. even more areas of sharing than vital
ii. all possible activities are joint

iii.if they do not actually work together, they share their work extensively by talking to
each other, having lunch together, and traveling together when possible
iv. it is as if 2 partners do not have a truly separate existence
v. infidelity would be virtually unthinkable
8.

What is a utilitarian marriage?

a. exist for economic cooperation, maintaining the extended family line, establishing
alliances among familia, or other purposes not related to couple intimacy

9.

What are the characteristics of the three types of utilitarian marriages?

a. conflict-habitual:
i. the purpose seems to be tension and conflict
ii. a central theme is to control and channel the conflict, which rarely exhibits itself in
public
iii.largely consists of verbal arguments, some of which provide running battles for the
duration of the marriage
iv. there is a high level of negativity that might be missed by a partner who got into a
more passive, less conflicted, relationship
b. devitalized:
i. once intrinsic but have lost their spirit
ii. clear discrepancy between young marriage expectations and the middle aged reality
iii.marriage still serves as a base of operations for each partner, and the couple have their
children or other memories
iv. although the partners sometimes miss the earlier intimacy, they largely accept the
changes without developing strong anagonisms
c. passive-congenial:
i. similar to devitalized except that there never was a strong emotional component
ii. congenial means having similar tastes and habits or being friendly and sociable
iii.although there is little strong emotion, there is also little conflict
iv. this style fits well with dual career or parallel kinds of marriage

10.
How do the various measures of marital quality differ: happiness, satisfaction,
adjustment, stability?
a. happiness: characterized by good luck, pleasure, satisfaction, or joy; happiness is not
something a person can aim directly for but is an accidental by-product of other
phenomena;
b. satisfaction: fulfillment of a desire, need, or appetite; contentment derived from having
needs met

c. adjustment: the act or means of adapting, corresponding, or conforming

d. stability: resistance to change, self-restoring, consistently dependable
11.

Do most people characterize their marriages as happy or unhappy?

a. over 60% characterize their marriage as very happy (men more likely to report more
happy)

12.

How does role consensus affect marital quality?

a. ROLE CONSENSUS: agreement between actors about how a role should be played
b. the greater the degree of role consensus, and the better each spouse meets the role
expectations of the other, the better the marital quality

13.

What are relationship maintenance behaviors?

a. actions taken by participants to preserve ongoing relationships
b. help to continue marriages by preventing decline, by enhancing them, or by their repair
and re-establishment

Chapter 11: Population and Family Planning

LECTURE
1. What is pronatalism?
*cultural pressure to assume role of parent
*belief that all married couples should have children
2. What is the ideal family size in the U.S.?
-most americans want 2 to 3 children
*46% two children
*26% three children
3.

What is modernization?
a. Urbanization- children no longer economic asset but economic cost, focus on emotional
bond,
b. Contraception- childbearing becomes a matter of if and when

4.

How and why has modernization affected fertility rates? Know the studies we went over
in class.

a. Urbanization and contraception

b. Womens education: contraceptive use, age at fist intercourse, acceptance of out-ofwedlock childbearing
c. Womens paid labor- career training/ advancement occurs during prime childbearing
years; postpone pregnancy- fewer children; plan births around professional life
Why do parents decide to have children?
Joy of having children- 76%
Spouse/partners wishes- 50%
Adequate financial resources- 47%
It just happened- 35%
Care for me when Im old- 15%
Pressure for family- 4%
2002 Survey of National Family Growth:
*Education:
No HS diploma/GED: already fathered- 1.8; total expected- 2.6
HS diploma/ GED : already fathered- 1.5; total expected- 2.1
Some college: already fathered- 1.0; total expected- 2.2
College degree: already fathered- 0.9; total expected- 2.0
4.

How does age of mother affect birth rates?

a. may be harder to conceive in old age

5.

How have birth rates changed between 1990 and 2008?

a. Age 15-19: 1990- 61%; 2008- 41% : 87% unmarried
b. Age 20-24: 1990- 119%; 2008- 103%: 61% unmarried
c. Age 25-29: 1990- 121%; 2008- 117%
d. Age 30-34: 1990- 80%; 2008- 100%
e. Age 35-39: 1990- 32%; 2008- 47%
f. Age 40-44: 1990- 5%; 2008- 10%

6.

How does the likelihood of being unmarried when giving birth change by age of mother?
a. younger=less likely to be married

7.

What is happening to the teen birth rate?

a. The share of births to teens mothers that are NONMARITAL rose from 79% in 200 to
86% in 2009
b. Over the last several decades, the share of all NONMARITAL births that are to teens has
been DECLINING from 52% in 1975 to 21% in 2009
c. 2/3 of teen births are 18-19 years old
d. Decline is due to contraceptive use and delayed sexual activity
e. Teen birth rates are not going up

TEXT
1.

What is the fertility rate?

a. number of births to a woman
b. the average number of births per woman over a lifetime

2.

birth rate: the total number of births per 1000 women in a year

3.

The fecundity rate?

a. a biological potential of lifetime childbearing

4.

What is true of the fertility rate as compared to the fecundity rate in most societies, even
preindustrial societies?
a. rarely does the fertility rate approach the fecundity rate, although it comes close among
some groups

2.

What is latent fertility regulation?

a. cultural practices that affect fertility without conscious intent by individuals
b. example: family formation norms, polygyny

3.

Manifest fertility control?

a. practices used with the conscious purpose of limiting fertility

4.

What factors influenced the decline in fertility rates starting in the 1800s and continuing
on into the 20th c.?
a. Increasing numbers of years of formal education- resulted in postponed marriages and t/f
women were having fewer kids

b. Separation of men and women in the work force

c. increasing numbers of women working outside the home
d. Institutionalization of social security and other retirement plans reduced the necessity of
the elderly to rely on large numbers of children to support them
5.

According to the text, what was the most important contributor to the decline in fertility
rates?
a. having children became a net economic cost, rather than a net labor benefit

6.

Why do we still see higher fertility rates in poorer societies?

a. Death rates drop
b. Individual couples see large families as the only chance they have of being supported in
their old age
c. Pronatalist religions and cultures encourage large families in many parts of the world

7.

In what ways has pronatalism weakened in the United States?

a. Women 18-34 expect to have no births during their lifetime
b. Highly educated women most likely remain childless during their life
c. Some women just do not want to have kids

8.

What did the study by Polenko, Scanzoni, and Teachman find?

a. Compared women with children to women who had voluntarily decided to be childfree/some had not decided/ some wanted children but were postponing/ some wanted
children but werent able to have them
b. Compared with mothers, women without children in the voluntary, undecided, and
postponing categories had somewhat greater marital satisfaction

Chapter 13: Parents and Children

LECTURE
1. What are the assumptions of the sociobiological model of parenting? What is the problem
with this model?
-biology
*Males and females are biologically different
*Primacy of mother-child bond

Programmed to be nurturing
40 weeks gestation
Breastfeeding
-society/family
*Biology necessitates different roles in raising children
Sex-irreducible gender roles
*Biology requires the Separate Spheres model of family = traditional gender roles
2.

Problems with the sociobiological model of parenting

a. Assumes parenting role is only affected by biology
b. Does not take into account the role of culture
c. Misunderstands biology

3.

What do we know about the development of the mother-child bond?

a. Pace at which bond develops for mothers
b. varies just like it does for fathers
c. Encouraged for mothers

4.

How does culture affect breastfeeding?

a. If 90% of US families could comply with medical recommendations to breastfeed
exclusively for 6 months, the United States would save $13 billion per year and prevent an
excess 911 deaths, nearly all of which would be in infants

5.

What do the statistics show concerning breastfeeding rates in the US?

a.

6.

What are the characteristics of the motherhood mystique (including mask of

motherhood, intensive mothering)?
a. Ultimate fulfillment to motherhood- source of identity, putting off childbearing is bad
b. Naturally good at parenting
c. mask of motherhood
d. Intense, exclusive devotion to mothering is best for children

7.

What is the characteristics of the Mask of motherhood?- Must enjoy all the work and
not complain

8.
9.

What is intensive mothering?-Watching their every move

10.

What are the characteristics of mothering as a role?

a. Conscious of being directly in charge of child's care
b. Day-to-day care of child
i. a) Preservation = ensuring physical survival
ii. Fostering growth = physical, psychological, emotional
iii.Socialization = rules, norms of culture & society

11.

How has the father role changed historically?

a. <18th c. Primary Parent
i. vocational/moral training
b. 18th - 20th c...separate spheres
i. Primary provider...financial responsibility
ii. Substitute caregiver...babysitter
c. 1970's...cultural shift in the "Good Father
i. there from birth
ii. day-to-day child care

12.
What did the 2002 National Survey of Family Growth find concerning attitudes about
fathering and fathers activities with young children?
a. It is more important for a man to spend a lot of time with his family than to be successful
at his career.
i. 76% of men and 72% of women agreed/strongly agreed
13.
What limitations/barriers may fathers experience as they try to take on more child
rearing activities?
a. non-residential fathers:
i. residential fathers are more likely to spend time with their children that nonresidential fathers
b. employment:
i. reality of unequal salaries: men more likely to work full-time
ii. men not encouraged to do both, may be penalized

c. attitudes about mens roles

i. * pop culture bumbling dad
* ads & products targeted at Mom
* no changing stations in men's rooms
* professionals may treat Dad as incapable or uninvolved
* parenting magazines... where's Dad?
d. mothers=gatekeepers
i. mother's ambivalence about sharing
ii. * marital relationship: more marital intimacy = more child involvement

TEXT
1.

What factors are related to pronatalism in the U.S.?

a. the belief that it was bad for a youngster to be an only child
b. RELIGION: catholics more likely to have 3 or more children, followed by conservative
protestants and jews; persons with no religion were least likely to want 3 or more children
c. people from large families of orientation are more likely to want large families of
procreation
d. RACE: among married couples, blacks are more likely than whites to have 3 or more
children; hispanics have more than both white and black

2.

Do parents view having children as having more advantages or disadvantages?

a. more advantages: thought as being necessary for having a real family and because they
were seen as sources of love and affection
b. seen as protection against loneliness and the impersonality of the world at large

3.

What have various studies found concerning the transition to parenthood?

a. they have found that the birth of the first child is associated with declining satisfaction
with marriage, sex life, occupation, and with life in general for both husbands and wifes

4.

What is the traditionalizing influence of parenthood?

a. the tendency of couples to develop more traditional, gender specific, roles once they have
a child
b. women assume more of the responsibility for child and home care and less of the
economic responsibility

5.

pp347-350: What do studies show concerning the importance of mothers to children, the
importance of fathers to children?
a. mothers tend to maintain parenthood throughout life, regardless of their relationship the
the childs father
b. fathers tend to have close relationships with children as long as they have a relationship
with the child mother but often drift away from the child if the adult relationship ends
c. in american culture, a woman is a mother all of her life, but a man is a father if he has a
wife-even if he has a wife, a poor relationship with her is quite likely to mean he will have
a poor relationship with children
d. bother motherhood and fatherhood are largely socially constructed, fatherhood is more
subject to environmental and cultural influences than is motherhood

6.

The effect of nontraditional parenting on children?

a. children have nontraditional gender attitudes and daughters are more likely to cohabit

7.

Why is maintaining close relationships with children more difficult for fathers than
mothers?
a. Mothers are the ones who nurture and breastfeed the baby; gender roles and biology
b. Mothers maintain parenthood throughout life and dads tend to not be as involved

8.

What have studies shown concerning the effects of single parenting on children?

*poor relationships with on of their parents

9.

What factors improve the outcomes for kids?

a.

10.

What factors negatively affect children?

a.

11.

What have studies shown concerning the effects of having lesbian parents on children?
a.

12.
What are the characteristics of the three styles of parenting developed by Baumrind:
authoritarian, permissive, authoritative.
a. authoritarian:

i. have rigid expectations about proper behavior and see unquestioned obedience to
these expectations as the most important quality of their children
ii. respect for authority is emphasized, and punishment is often used to achieve that goal
iii.childrens obedience, not discussion and good communication, is seen as the solution
to problems
b. permissive:
i. see children as persons who have the right to have their emotional and physical needs
met
ii. deal with their children nearly as equals, being nonpunitive and accepting
iii.see themselves as resources for their children, who they believe will turn out fine on
their own without a lot of guidance or discipline
iv. there are frequent hugs and other physical touching of children and and absence of
physical punishment
v. parents attempt to use reason and persuasion with their children
c. authoritative:
i. somewhere on the continuum between authoritarian and permissive
ii. referred to as strictness with affection
iii.the apparent choice of current child rearing experts
iv. the most nurturing and generally use rewards rather than punishment
v. respond to their childrens demands for attention
vi. somewhat democratic yet controlling and demanding
vii.

warm, receptive, and rational in their interactions with their children

viii.

children are allowed to express their feelings to their parents