Our House Perusal Libvb

By TIM F IRTH
Music and Lyrics by MADNESS
LIBRETTO / VOCAL BOOK
Josef Weinberger Limited

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London W1T 3JJ
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OUR HOUSE
Book Copyright 2009 by Tim Firth
Edition Copyright 2009 by Josef Weinberger Limited, London
All Rights Reserved
For individual song copyright details, see appendix.
PHOTOCOPYING THIS COPYRIGHT MATERIAL IS ILLEGAL
Applications to perform this musical must be made,

BEFORE REHEARSALS COMMENCE, to:
JOSEF WEINBERGER LIMITED
London W1T 3JJ
United Kingdom
Tel: +44 (0)20 7580 2827
Fax: +44 (0)20 7436 9616
www.josef-weinberger.com
September 2009
by TIM FIRTH
Directed by Matthew Warchus
Choreographed by Peter Darling
Orchestrations by Steve Sidwell

Musical Supervisor, Vocal Arrangements and Additional Material: Phil Bateman
World Premiere Performance 28th October 2002, Cambridge Theatre
CAST
2003 WEST END PRODUCTION
2008 UK TOUR
Michael Jibson
Chris Carswell
Julia Gay
Miria Parvin
Ian Reddington
Steve Brookstein
KATH CASEY
Lesley Nichol
Gwyneth Strong
LEWIS
Oliver Jackson
Jack Shalloo
EMMO
Richard Frame
Michael Everest
BILLIE
Tameka Empson
Jenny Fitzpatrick
ANGIE
Andrea Francis
Sophia Nomvete
REECEY
Matt Cross
Sam Mackay
MR PRESSMAN
Mike Scott
Trevor Jary
JOE CASEY
SARAH
JOE'S DAD
iii
iv
Production Notes by
TIM FIRTH
The main challenge of this musical is of course that it is two musicals. The story splits early
on to follow the two paths which Joe Caseys life could have followed pending a fateful
decision he makes on the night of his sixteenth birthday.
The ways of representing those two paths lie at the creative heart of any production. The
transfers between the black and the white world increase in speed and require increasing
levels of ingenuity. After the experience of two productions, in the West End and then on
tour, the main piece of advice I can offer is this: people are primarily interested in other
people. The audience watch the cast far more than they watch the set, and three walls
turning from black to white to represent the switch from Good Joes story to Bad Joes
story is never going to be as effective as the actor himself simply changing the colour, say, of
a baseball hat from black to white.
The musical travels through a young mans life from the age of sixteen to his early twenties.
As such it visits many locations. The emphasis here once again needs to be on ingenuity
rather than expense. The cast should be gamefully employed furnishing and creating the
many stations passed through en route from terraced houses to penthouses, shops, pubs,
schools, car showrooms, even Egyptian-themed hotels in Las Vegas. When writing Our
House I deliberately wrote the impossible in the belief that the more you ask from creative
people, the more you get. The bigger the challenge, the more people rise to it.
v
It is worth remembering that even though in larger scale productions we had a real car and
cinematic projection and a whole host of other treats, the two things the audience rose to
salute at the end of each show came absolutely for free; ingenuity and energy.
Get these and you are ninety percent of the way to building Our House.
THE PRINCIPAL CAST Thumbnails

JOE sixteen, rough diamond but a diamond nonetheless.
SARAH girl next door, slightly more middle-class background.
EMMO and LEWIS Joes best mates, loosely related to him and taken in by Joes Mum.
The former is a big kid who would chase sticks if you threw them, the latter a more
sensitive lad with a more exposed moral nerve.
BILLIE and ANGIE Sarahs best mates, sharp-tongued and sassy with their eyes on a way
out of their lowly social beginnings. Intolerant of males, except well-bred ones.
JOES MUM, KATH beaten down by life but never beaten, a heart the size of a house with
a huge, feisty love for her family.
JOES DAD a man of fun and spirit who married the right woman but took the wrong.
path in life, died as a result, and is now desperate for his son not to repeat the pattern.
REECEY a smiling, charming, superficially likeable force of darkness.
MISTER PRESSMAN like Reecey, except middle-aged and in control of a large company.
THE OTHER CHARACTERS schoolkids, relatives, barristers, clowns, dogs, prisoners,
market traders etc are many in number and can be played by a cast of infinite size. One
joy of Our House is that it is hard to conceive of a cast shape in which everyone doesnt at
some point have their moment.
vi
THE BAND
TENOR SAXOPHONE dbl. Flute / Clarinet
TRUMPET dbl. Flugelhorn / Tambourine
KEYBOARD 1 (Musical Director)
KEYBOARD 2
GUITAR
BASS
DRUMS
Notes on the music by

PHIL BATEMAN (MUSICAL DIRECTOR)
In the West End the band for Our House had 9 players:
3 keyboards, guitar, bass, drums, tenor sax (doubling flute and clarinet for underscore),
trumpet and violin.
I would imagine the minimum for a production would be 4 - comprising keyboards, guitar,
bass and drums. If you can add a 'dirty' sax and even trumpet you'll really be able to
achieve that authentic Madness sound.
Ideally when singing, the actors should try to achieve a 'sung-spoken' quality. The
ensemble numbers should sit somewhere between musical theatre and the gusto of a rugby
crowd! I hope you have as much fun singing these great songs as we did when we put the
show together enjoy!
vii
MUSICAL NUMBERS
ACT ONE
1.
Opening (Instrumental) .....................................................................1
1a.
Los Palmas Seven (Underscore) (Instrumental)...................................1
2.
Our House (Priest, Joe, Emmo, Lewis, Casey St. Residents) .................3
2a.
Our House Playoff (Instrumental)......................................................9
2b.
Balcony Underscore (Instrumental) ..................................................11
3.
Simple Equation (Dad) ...................................................................11
4.
My Girl (Emmo, Bad Joe, Lewis) .....................................................14
4a.
Simple Equation Reprise (Dad) ...................................................18
4b.
Magistrates Court (All I Wanted / My Girl) (Kath, Dad, Lads).......19
5.
Baggy Trousers (Reecey, Schoolkids, Mr Jesmond, Bad Joe).................22
5a.
6.
Embarrassment
(Careers Officer, Reecey, Billie, Angie, Emmo, Neighbours, Lewis,
Aunt, Uncle, Security Guards, Kath, Grandad, Good Joe) ..................29
6a.
Embarrassment Playoff (Instrumental) ............................................32
6b.
Baggy Trousers Underscore (Instrumental) ......................................34
7.
Embarrassment Reprise (Encouragement Version)

(Bad Joe, Heather, Sales Reps, London Alarms Boss,) ..........................35
7a.
Baggy Trousers / Our House Underscore (Instrumental)..................37
8.
Driving In My Car (Good Joe, Lewis, Emmo, Billie, Angie, Sarah) ....39
8a-I.
My Girl Reprise (Ballad Version) (Sarah, Dad).............................43
8a-II.
Driving In My Car Reprise (Dad, Bad Joe, Salesman)....................43
8b.
After Driving In My Car (Instrumental)...........................................45
8c.
Simple Equation Reprise (Dad, Chorus)........................................47
9.
The Return Of The Los Palmas Seven (Instrumental) ......................50
10.
Shut Up (Reecey, Coppers, Good Joe ) ................................................52
11.
Tormorrows Just Another Day / The Sun and the Rain

(Prisoners, Good Joe, Girls Chorus, Bad Joe, Sarah) ............................56
viii
ACT TWO
12.
Night Boat To Cairo (Dad) ............................................................60
12a.
Night Boat (Vegas Underscore) (Instrumental) ................................61
13.
Wings Of A Dove (Carib Combo, Billie, Angie, All) ........................62
14.
One Better Day (Dad, Good Joe, Chorus, Kath) ...............................64
14a.
Our House Reprise (Good Joe, Dad) ............................................67
15.
Rise And Fall (Good Joe, Chorus) .....................................................67
16.
House Of Fun / Rise And Fall / My Girl

(Bad Joe, Julie, Good Joe, Mr. Pressman, Chorus) ..............................68
16a.
Scene Change (Underscore) (Instrumental) .....................................72
17.
N.W.5 (Sarah, Dad, Chorus) ...........................................................75
17a.
Embarrassment Reprise (Law Firm)

(Clerk, Barrister, Good Joe, Harper, Smith, Massey,
Harrassed Small-Time Lawyer.) .......................................................77
17b.
Underscore (My Girl / NW5 / Simple Equation)

(Sarah, Dad, Chorus) .......................................................................81
18.
It Must Be Love (Sarah, Good Joe) ..................................................84
19.
The Sun And The Rain Reprise (Stallholders)

(Good Joe, Bad Joe, Stallholders, Chorus) ..........................................86
19a.
Simple Equation (Reprise) (Dad, Bad Joe) ......................................92
20.
Primrose Hill / Our House (Reprise) (Dad, Good Joe, Company) ....93
21.
Bows (Company) .............................................................................97
22.
Encore / Play Out (Company) .........................................................97
ix
OUR HOUSE
OUR HOUSE
ACT ONE
MUSIC NO 1: OPENING
(Turns into . . . )
MUSIC NO 1a: LOS PALMAS SEVEN (Underscore)
SCENE Raise curtain to see: A STAGE lit by a GLITTER BALL in which there are MANY
COUPLES DANCING. We gradually isolate and spot, in the middle of this, two people far FAR
less adept than the others, falling about, having the laugh of their lives.
DAD
(calls) Leg! Leg! TURN! NOW! (etc.)
KATH
What? How!? (As he steers her.) Whoa!
DAD
Ive told you! KEEP IT STEADY! THIS IS THE SIMPLEST DANCE IN

THE UNIVERSE!
(What theyre doing isnt exactly dancing, more staggering with panache. After
only a few further steps, she trips and falls into his arms in fits of laughter. With
theatrical aplomb, DAD lets her fall back like in some classy fandango.)
KATH
Listen, will you just stop it! Ive got something to tell you!
DAD
(tries to carry on, laughing) It cant be more important than this!
KATH
It is! It is! STOP! (Holds him at arms length.) Yr going to be a dad.

(A moment of wonder. DAD lets her stand as though shes porcelain.)
DAD
Yr kidding. (In wonder.) An its definitely mine?
KATH
(deadpan) Its either yours or Clint Eastwoods.
OUR HOUSE
DAD
Oh God. Oh wow. (With rapture.) We might be having Clint Eastwoods

baby!
KATH
(hits him) Oi! So are you gonna ask me to marry y, then or what?
(Pause. Then DAD smiles.)
DAD
You betcha.
(Fireworks go up behind them as we hear . . . )
MAESTRO
(V.O.)
Ladeeeez and gennulmen. The winnerz of our dance contest. Our King and
Queen-n . . .
(The SPOTLIGHT strafes the dancers . . . )
MAESTRO
(V.O. Contd)
The greatest dancers in the world on Margate pier tonight . . . couple

number-r-r fifteen!
(They look at each other, fall about laughing as A PHOTOGRAPHER takes a
photo. They strike a comic pose for it. The flash cues a sudden light change . . . )
JOE (O.S.)
MUM!
(Music ends . . . as KATHs DAYDREAM ENDS and JOE CASEY appears all
in the same beat - raggy school uniform, sixteen, rough diamond. But a diamond
nonetheless.)
JOE
Ha hey-y!
(He is on high octane, rushes on, grabs mum and dances a few steps with her,
just like DAD did. Singing his own accompaniment . . . ) La da di dah-dahdahh . . .
(DAD backs off and watches. At this point we dont know he cannot see DAD.)
KATH
Here he is, the birthday boy!
OUR HOUSE
JOE
Ive got something to tell y!

(He puts MUM in exactly the same fandango position as DAD did.)
KATH
WHOA!
JOE
She said - YES!
KATH
Oh did she now! And have you checked that I approve of this girl?
JOE
Shes coming - on a DATE!
KATH
This the wonderful Sarah?
JOE
(suddenly serious) Hey you dont think its like charity? Like shes only
agreed cause its my sixteenth birthday?
KATH
Shes agreed, Joe Casey, because any girld be mad not to. (Strokes his hair.)
And you take her dancing. Thats what your dad did with me.
JOE
(change of mood, loses all thought of dancing) Yeah well. Not sure following in
me Dads footsteps is exactly a good start, do you?
KATH
(straightens his hair) Eh, he was alright, yr dad. He was just a good man who
made a few bad choices.
JOE
(straightens hers back) Its not hard to make the right choices, Mum. Theres
a wrong way and a right way. Its a pretty simple equation.
(There is a DOORBELL.)
MUSIC NO 2: OUR HOUSE

JOE
Now if youll excuse me, Ive got about ten minutes before Sarah arrives . . .
(Starts to take tie off.) . . . so I hope youve not arranged for anyone to call
round?
KATH
Now would I arrange that? For my son? On his sixteenth birthday?

(The PRIEST is at the door with a present.)
OUR HOUSE
PRIEST
Happy Birthday Joe!
JOE
(wry smile) FATHER WEARS HIS SUNDAY BEST.
KATH
Oh now look whos turned up.
JOE
(trying to steer her and the PRIEST away)

MOTHERS TIRED, SHE NEEDS A REST
THE KIDS ARE PLAYING UP DOWNSTAIRS.
(A SKATEBOARDER razzes past.)
KATH
(to SKATEBOARDER) Oi!
PRIEST
(ushering in a NUN) SISTERS SIGHING IN HER SLEEP.
NUN
I remember him when he was this little . . .
JOE
(himself) BROTHERS GOT A DATE TO KEEP

HE CANT HANG AROUND.
(JOE opens the door to find EMMO and LEWIS there with PRESENTS.)
EMMO + LEWIS HAHAEYYY!

OUR HOUSE
JOE
(sighs) Emmo. Lewis.
EMMO + LEWIS IN THE MIDDLE OF OUR STREET

OUR HOUSE
IN THE MIDDLE OF OUR
(EMMO and LEWIS re-open the door almost instantaneously to reveal a whole
party of people who keep flooding in. In this melee, did we but realise, DAD has
been lost totally. JOE is trying to get out, but everyone is keeping him in!)
EVERYONE
Ha hey!
JOE
OUR HOUSE IT HAS A CROWD.

THERES ALWAYS SOMETHING HAPPENING
AND ITS USUALLY QUITE LOUD.
OUR MUM, SHES SO HOUSE-PROUD.
OUR HOUSE
KATH
Meaning what?
EMMO + LEWIS (arm round her)

NOTHING EVER SLOWS HER DOWN
AND A MESS IS NOT ALLOWED.
KATH
Dead right.
EVERYONE
OUR HOUSE IN THE MIDDLE OF OUR STREET

OUR HOUSE IN THE MIDDLE OF OUR
OUR HOUSE IS OUR CASTLE AND OUR KEEP
(Underscore continues.)
KATH
Ill give you house proud. You spread word round Camden that this street
is a no-go zone for any of them scummy drug dealers.
LADS
(stand to attention) Yes.
KATH
This is not just any street.
LADS
No.
KATH
This is Casey Street.
LADS
Yes!
KATH
NW 1.
LADS
Yes!
KATH
No-one touches that name.
EVERYONE
OUR HOUSE IN THE MIDDLE OF OUR STREET

OUR HOUSE IS OUR CASTLE AND OUR KEEP
OUR HOUSE IN THE MIDDLE OF
NUR NUR, NUR NUR, NUR NUR, NUR NUR
NUR NUR, NUR NUR, NUR NUR, NUR NUR
OUR HOUSE
(CASEY STREET INHABITANTS join in the dance, which is urban, informal

and comic.)
CASEY STREET
INHABITANTS NA NA NA NA-NA-NA / NAAAA
AY-YAH-YAH- / YAHHHH
NA NA NA NA-NA-NA / NAAAA
EVERYONE
NANA NANA NANA NAA

NANA NANA NANA NAA
NA NA NA NA-NA
NA NA NA NA-NA
NA NA
NA-NA NA NA NA
NANA NANA NANA NAA
NANA NANA NANA NAA
NA NA NA NA-NA
NA NA NA NA-NA
NA NA
NA-NA NA NA NAAAAA
(Very spare percussive underscore.)
JOE
Okay. She must be coming. These are her mates.

(Enter BILLIE and ANGIE in their customised school uniforms.)
LEWIS
(arms wide like a gigolo) Ha heyyy! Billie and Angie Morton!

(BILLIE and ANGIE pose the same . . . )
BILLIE / ANGIE Ha heyyy! Tall and ugly bastard. (They beckon in . . .) Sarah?
(SARAH bounds in . . .)
OUR HOUSE
SARAH
Hey Joe!
( . . . but is steered away by BILLIE and ANGIE)
ANGIE
(swerves SARAH away from JOE) Right. One little word of warning.
BILLIE
How can we put this?
ANGIE
We deserve a man with prospects.
BILLIE
Were not gonna find any round here.
ANGIE
We MIGHT if YOU get to university.
BILLIE
You wont get to university if youre six months up the duff.
SARAH
(is handed a bag) Whats that?
ANGIE
The Femsafe Femidom.
BILLIE
Its like having sex with an Asda bag, but its okay.
SARAH
(did his mum hear?) Girls!

(Meanwhile EMMO and LEWIS have got JOE similarly to one side . . . )
LEWIS
As like adopted brothers we felt a certain responsibility, it being your

sixteenth birthday an all that.
EMMO
(produces it) We have bought you the worlds CLASSIEST condom!
JOE
(did mum hear?) Lads?
LEWIS
Its called The Surprise Harmony.
EMMO
It is the princess of condoms.
JOE
Is it luminous?
EMMO
No.
OUR HOUSE
JOE
Colour?
EMMO
Normal.
JOE
Flavour?
EMMO
None.
JOE
(s.v.) Right. (Puts it in pocket.) Whys it called The Surprise Harmony ?
EMMO
When you reach orgasm it plays The Power Of Love.
JOE
WHAT?
EVERYONE
OUR HOUSE
IN THE MIDDLE OF OUR STREET
OUR HOUSE
IN THE MIDDLE OF OUR OUR HOUSE
IS OUR CASTLE AND OUR KEEP
OUR HOUSE
IN THE MIDDLE OF OUR -
EVERYONE
(Contd)
EVERYONE
(Contd)
WELCOME TO THE HOUSE OF FUN

WELCOME TO THE LIONS DEN
WELCOME TO THE HOUSE OF FUN, NOW IVE COME OF AGE
TEMPTATIONS ON ITS WAY
WELCOME TO THE HOUSE OF FUN.
NOW YOUVE COME OF AGE
OUR HOUSE
OUR HOUSE
OUR HOUSE
OUR HOUSE

OUR HOUSE
OUR HOUSE
OUR HOUSE
SARAH
Sixteen, Joe! Where dyou go when you can go anywhere?
JOE
(points at her) Somewhere very special!
EVERYONE
. . . IN THE MIDDLE OF OUR STREET!
MUSIC NO 2a: OUR HOUSE PLAYOFF
SCENE PENTHOUSE FLAT

A STORM breaks. Thunder and lightening. A door has a HUGE HAMMERING noise at the
other side of it. We wonder what the hell is going on until BANG it falls flat, knocked off its
hinges by . . . JOE!
JOE
Quick! Out of the rain! Out of the rain!

(SARAH peeps round the door.)
JOE (Contd)
(meaning the rain) Bleargh. Where did THAT all come from?
SARAH
(hushed whisper) JOE!
JOE
Storm came out of . . . (Gestures.) Come in-n!
SARAH
You just broke in!
JOE
I didnt break I just (Looks at door hanging off.) itd just swelled with
the rain. Look at . . . (Pulls out his wallet.) Oh god. My wallet! My trousers
are SOAKED.
OUR HOUSE
SARAH
You cant just (Frowns.) Whats that noise? Can you hear something? Can
you hear The Power Of Love?
(Pause. We can indeed hear the tinny single line of The Power Of Love. JOE
immediately realises where its coming from and puts his hand in his back
pocket.)
JOE
Anyway. This is what I wanted to show you. (He throws the condom away
over the drop.)
SARAH
Yve caused real damage here, Joe.
JOE
(cocky) Dont worry. I dont bruise easy. I work out quite a lot, so . . .
SARAH
I mean the door! This is breaking and entry . . .
JOE
No-ones rented these flats yet.
SARAH
(going, but unsure) But they still belong to someone. They still belong to
whoever . . . (Looks round.) Pressman Developers.
JOE
I know. Like everything round here suddenly. Well I tell you what. You
wanna see some REAL builders? (Nods out over the view.) Why I brought
you up here. My mums family built that.
(SARAH looks at him.)
JOE (Contd)
The whole estate. My great-great-grandad was a gang leader building the

Irish Estate, so good they named a street after him. Casey Street. (Slight
pause.) Theres even some story Mum goes on about that they gave him the
house, yknow. Our house. See? With the red door?
(Beat.)
SARAH
I thought you were taking me somewhere very special.

(Theres a pause. JOE looks down.)
10
OUR HOUSE
JOE
Your mates think Im gonna end up like me dad, dont they? I suppose
theyve told y?
SARAH
(they have) He went to prison.
JOE
(nods, wry smile) Thought they would. (A beat.) Yeah he went to prison. Lost
his job. Started . . . making bad choices, went to prison . . . then when he
came out of prison he never came home.
SARAH
Where is he now?
MUSIC NO 2b: BALCONY UNDERSCORE

(DAD appears.)
SARAH
Joe?
JOE
He died.
SARAH
(beat) How?
JOE
A loser and a scumbag, Sarah. Thats how.

(Music ends.)
SARAH
(moves in on JOE) You know where Im gonna end up, Joe Casey? Im
gonna go into law. An you know why? Because regardless of what people
tell me I reckon Im a pretty good judge of character.
(There is the sound of truncheon on scaffold.)
VOICE (O.S.)
This is the Police!
MUSIC NO 3: SIMPLE EQUATION

(A torchlight starts to rake the balcony.)
SARAH
Oh my God.
11
OUR HOUSE
VOICE (O.S.)
Is someone in there?
SARAH
Joe I wont get into law at ALL if I get arrested.
VOICE (O.S.)
Oi!
SARAH
Thatll be the END! I wont be able to, ever! What are we gonna do?
JOE
Run. Wed probably never get found out!
SARAH
But if we did, Joe! IF WE DID . . . ?
VOICE
WHOS IN THERE?
(He pushes SARAH back to the door he barged down. She resists.)
JOE
Okay, YOU go.
SARAH
JOE!
JOE
RUN!
SARAH
But what are YOU going to do, Joe Casey?

(At that point the stage FILLS with rotating doors, black to white to black to
white . . . )
DAD
What are you going to do, Joe Casey?

(JOE is wracked. He pushes SARAH out.)
JOE
GO!
DAD
Golden boy?
(Those doors keep gyrating, like a representation of the options whirling in the
mind of this sixteen year old. Suddenly the space becomes ethereal, otherworldly.)
12
OUR HOUSE
DAD
Run and make the escape of a criminal?

(He stops a SINGLE BLACK DOOR gyrating and presents it as an option.)
DAD
Stay and surrender like an honest man?

(He stops a SINGLE WHITE DOOR gyrating and presents that as a contrary
option. DAD is so close he can practically touch his son and we can see he is
drawn to do that.)
DAD
Its not hard to make the right choices, Mum. Theres a wrong way and a
right way. Its a pretty simple equation!
(DAD slams the two contrasting doors together, and with a crack of lightening,
they touch . . . and JOE splits in two, one JOE in white - GOOD JOE - and one
in black - BAD JOE.)
DAD
ITS THE SIMPLE EQUATION OF WRONG VERSUS RIGHT

PROBLEM AS EASY AS BLACK VERSUS WHITE
THE SIMPLE EQUATION OF NIGHT VERSUS DAY
FACING THE MUSIC, OR RUNNING AWAY . . .
(The BLACK JOE bursts through the black door. All the doors, currently a
mixture of black and white, ARE TURNED TO BLACK, so we are now in a
BLACK WORLD.)
DAD
(+ B.V.)
CAUSE WITHOUT LOW THERE IS NO HIGH

IF NOTHING FELL THERED BE NO SKY
IS IT ALWAYS SO VERY CLEAR?
ITS THE DAYS THAT SEPARATE THE NIGHT
THE SHADOWS BY WHICH WE RECOGNISE THE LIGHT.
(Music ends. BAD JOE stands panting, regaining his breath as SARAH appears
slowly, dreadfully, dress torn, face cut, holding her arm.)
BAD JOE
We did it! We got away. HA! WE DID A RUNNER AND WE GOT

(He sees the damage. Pause.) Oh God. Are you Okay? (He goes to tend to her.
She backs off.) What?
13
OUR HOUSE
SARAH
I cant believe you did that. I cant believe you ran away. I thought I knew
you. I dont know you at all, do I?
BAD JOE
We didnt get caught. Its not like we got caught. We . . .
SARAH
(indicating her ripped blazer) A policeman did that, Joe. Thats how close I was.
You probably didnt notice. You were fifty metres across the building site.
(SARAH starts to go . . . )
BAD JOE
Sarah . . . I
(. . . then turns.)
SARAH
Actually maybe Im not cut out for law. Maybe Im not such a good judge of
character.
MUSIC NO 4: MY GIRL
BAD JOE
Sarah? Sarah! (He races off.)
SCENE IRISH THEME PUB, CAMDEN

EMMO is revealed, pissed, at a table loaded with whiskies.
EMMO
MY GIRLS MAD AT ME.

I DIDNT WANT TO SEE THE FILM TONIGHT.
I FOUND IT HARD TO SAY.
SHE THOUGHT ID HAD ENOUGH OF HER.
WHY CANT SHE SEE.
SHES LOVELY TO ME?
BUT I LIKE TO STAY IN AND WATCH TV ON MY OWN
EVERY NOW AND THEN.
(BAD JOE enters the pub. He is in his black track suit and cap.)
EMMO (Contd) Alright Joe?
14
OUR HOUSE
BAD JOE
MY GIRLS MAD AT ME
BEEN ON THE TELEPHONE FOR AN HOUR
WE HARDLY SAID A WORD
I TRIED AND TRIED BUT I COULD NOT BE HEARD.
WHY CANT I EXPLAIN?
EMMO
WHY CANT SHE SEE?
BAD JOE
WHY DO I FEEL THIS PAIN?
EMMO
SHES LOVELY TO ME
BUT I LIKE TO STAY IN
BAD JOE
SHE DOESNT UNDERSTAND
EMMO
AND WATCH TV ON MY OWN
BAD JOE
SHE TAKES IT ALL THE WRONG . . .

(In bursts LEWIS.)
LEWIS
Wahey! How y doing laddos? (Sits.) Bloody hell. I tell y . . . (Breathes in.) . . .
MY GIRL (Music breaks.)
BAD JOE
+ EMMO
Doesnt exist.
LEWIS
Fair point. (Music resumes.) Pint of lager, Dave. So how come yr not out
with whats her face?
EMMO
(shut up) Nggrshttup.
BAD JOE
Because shes not my girl anymore, is she?
LEWIS
Eh?
EMMO
She should be his girl but . . . (shes )
15
OUR HOUSE
BAD JOE
She should be, . . . (but shes )
EMMO
Shes mad at him.
LEWIS
Really?
BAD JOE
WE TALKED AND TALKED UNTIL IT WAS LIGHT . . .
EMMO
Gets to like where he thinks its agreed an all . . .
BAD JOE
I THOUGHT WED AGREED.
EMMO
He thought theyd talked over it all. An then goes an says that
BAD JOE
I THOUGHT WED TALKED IT OUT.
EMMO
Course now when he tries . . . (to say anything at all about the whole )
BAD JOE
NOW WHEN I TRY TO SPEAK . . .
EMMO
She sort of says
BAD JOE
I DONT CARE.
EMMO
She says . . . (hes . . .)
BAD JOE
IM UNAWARE
EMMO
And now . . . (she says hes . . .)
BAD JOE
SHE SAYS IM WEAK.

(EMMO and LEWIS wince.)
BARTENDER
DAVE
Alright lads. Yve had enough.
EMMO
Ive not.
16
OUR HOUSE
BAD JOE
Im fine.
LEWIS
Ive only had one whisky.

(They all get off their barstools . . .)
BAD JOE /
EMMO / LEWIS Hurp.
( . . . And realise they ARE pissed. In trying to get up they end up choreographed.)
(Music continues DANCE OF THE PISSED)
SCENE CAMDEN CANAL

They end up in the moonlight in a shabby parade of male bonding.
LADS
LA LA LA LAAAAA
NA NA NA NA NA NAAAA . . .
LA LA LA LA LA LAAA
NA NA NAAA
NA NA NAAA
NA NA NAAA-AAA . . .
(BAD JOE, EMMO and LEWIS collapse on each other.)
LEWIS
At the end of the day who needs women? I dont.
BAD JOE
Lewis, you dont need women in the same way someone whos never had a
chocolate biscuit doesnt need a chocolate biscuit.
EMMO
I love chocolate biscuits.

(BAD JOE eases himself up . . . )
BAD JOE

(Underscore carries the tune.)
17
OUR HOUSE

SHE DOESNT REALISE
SHE TAKES IT ALL . . .
(DAD appears again.)
DAD
THE WRONG . . .
MUSIC NO 4a: SIMPLE EQUATION - REPRISE

. . . WAY
(A thundercrack, and gradually that etheral, cloud-sculling, otherwordly space
returns. The stage is filled with rotating doors which not only clear BAD JOE,
EMMO and LEWIS, but return us to the exact same point we were in the
Penthouse Flat, at the exact same moment of split.)
SCENE PENTHOUSE FLAT
DAD
ITS THE SIMPLE EQUATION, LIKE NIGHT VERSUS DAY?

OF OWNING UP NEATLY, OR RUNNING AWAY?
SO WHAT WOULD HAVE HAPPENED, THAT CAMDEN TOWN
NIGHT
IF GOLDEN BOY JOE TOOK THE PATH THAT SEEMED RIGHT?
(This time the WHITE JOE, now known as GOOD JOE, animates and goes
through the white door. The mixed doors are suddenly all turned to white. We
are now in the WHITE WORLD.)
DAD
CAUSE WITHOUT LOVE THERE IS NO HIGH

WITHOUT LOVE NO STARS NO SKY
WILL THIS RISE WHERE THAT ONE FELL
IS IT SO HARD TO TELL?
(The music is cut abruptly short by the strike of the MAGISTRATES gavel . . . )
SCENE MAGISTRATES COURT

MAGISTRATE
(hits gavel) Quiet please.
18
OUR HOUSE
GOOD JOE
JOES
SOLICITOR
MAGISTRATE
COUNCIL
SOLICITOR
Your honour, I did break into the flat but I didnt nick any stuff, I was just
to be honest I was trying to impress my girlfriend by showing her you
see actually it is quite interesting my family BUILT the Irish estate
(shutting him up) My client then showed admirable moral fibre in staying to
give himself up, in light of which we plead for leniency.
Right. Well. I will consider that plea, provided there are no further
submissions?
There is an additional submission in this case. The council are aware that
Pressman Developments Ltd is failing to secure any purchasers for their
Camden Quays developments and feel that criminal activity, however
petty, is contributing towards a general sense of urban malaise. As a result
they are urging local magistrates to hand down short custodial sentences . . .
MUSIC NO 4b: MAGISTRATES COURT ALL I WANTED / MY GIRL

DAD
(seems surprised) Custodial?
GOOD JOE
Custodial? You mean like . . . prison?
SCENE YOUNG OFFENDERS INSTITUTE

Enter a very cheery YOUTH CUSTODY OFFICER.
YOUTH CUSTODY
OFFICER
No no no no no, we dont use the P word, Mrs Casey.
(Clunk. GOOD JOE is suddenly at a table. KATH is led to the table as if at
visiting.)
YOUTH CUSTODY
OFFICER
This is a correctional facility. We really believe in building up a positive
self-image with our young clients. If they see themselves as criminals at the
age of sixteen then thats how the rest of society will see them. We want to
send them out of here saying (cheerily) My names Joe Casey, ex-young
offender, wiser, stonger, prouder!
19
OUR HOUSE
KATH
(hugging him) Ohhhh baby.
YOUTH CUSTODY
OFFICER
(sudden change of tone) That doesnt mean youre allowed to touch him.
(KATH cant even hug him, and has to defy all her instincts to move away.)
KATH
I did bring you a cake but they wouldnt let me in with it. (Pause.) They let
other mothers in with theirs, they just said mine was too crap.
(GOOD JOE smiles.)
GOOD JOE
Hi, mum.
(Underscore continues. A beat. KATH looks across at the son she cant touch.)
KATH
Youll do right. You will do right, golden boy, Joe Casey, you are. (Smiles.)
And Im not the only girl in Camden who thinks that.
GOOD JOE
Were sixteen, Mum. This is the summer they always go on about. (Slight
pause.) Sarah would be mad to wait.
(Times up. They are parted by the staff and GOOD JOE is led off.)
KATH
ALL I WANTED WAS A WORD
DAD
ANOTHER LOOK, A MOMENT MORE
KATH
DAD
A CHANCE TO ASK WHAT IS THIS FOR?

(DAD starts the doors spinning again.)
KATH
DAD
WHEN BOTH THE WRONG PATH AND THE RIGHT
KATH
20
OUR HOUSE
DAD
LEAVE HIM LONELY IN THE NIGHT

(We are now BACK in the BLACK WORLD, where we were before, with BAD
JOE, EMMO and LEWIS. Music continues.)
SCENE CAMDEN CANAL

BAD JOE

(Underscore carries the tune).
BAD JOE
(Contd)

SHE DOESNT REALISE
SHE TAKES IT ALL THE WRONG (WAY . . . )
REECEY (O.S.) Well well well.

(REECEY appears in the shadows.)
EMMO
Oh God. Its Reecey.
LEWIS
Alright, mate?
REECEY
(smiles) Good night girls.
EMMO
Absolutely. Come on big man.

(EMMO scoops LEWIS off. REECEY gestures BAD JOE to stay behind. He does so.)
BAD JOE
Alright, Reecey.
REECEY
Dont cry over spilt women, mate. Plenty of fish in the sea. (Smiles.) Yll
always get something after yr tackle.
(Pause.)
REECEY
Billie and Angie said you got into one of the new flats up Camden Quays.
21
OUR HOUSE
BAD JOE
Oh well. That. Wwwwell I . . . sort of
REECEY
Very impressive. (He stalks BAD JOE, smiling all the time.) Ever thought of
the future, Joby?
BAD JOE
What, you mean like . . . after exams?

(REECEY laughs, then checks himself. Pulls a serious face.)
BAD JOE
What?
REECEY
(stalks him) Sorry. I mean, sure. You COULD do exams. (Walks round.)
Alternatively you could come work with me. Im starting up a little business
venture.
BAD JOE
You mean . . . leave school early?
REECEY
Men of sixteen, now mate. Everythings legal. (Arm round BAD JOE.)
Youve seen what them penthouses are like now, Joe. Next time you walk
into one, own it. (A beat.) No-one ever made money workin for someone
else, Joe Casey. If I were you Id forget exams. An tell myself that as of
today . . . schools out! (He reaches up and ever so casually taps a school bell
with his fingers. It forms the bell-intro to:)
MUSIC NO 5: BAGGY TROUSERS

(Two SCHOOLGIRLS rush in to get REECEY to sign their shirts.)
SCHOOLGIRL 1 Ree-ecey!
SCHOOLGIRL 2 Sign me shirt. Sign me shirt!
REECEY
NAUGHTY BOYS IN NASTY SCHOOLS

HEADMASTERS BREAKING ALL THE RULES
HAVING FUN AND PLAYING FOOLS
SMASHING UP THE WOODWORK TOOLS.
ALL THE TEACHERS IN THE PUB
PASSING ROUND THE READY RUB
TRYING NOT TO THINK OF WHEN THE
LUNCHTIME BELL WILL RING AGAIN.
22
OUR HOUSE
OH WHAT FUN WE HAD

BUT DID IT REALLY TURN OUT BAD?
ALL I LEARNT AT SCHOOL WAS HOW TO BEND NOT BREAK
THE RULE
+ SCHOOLKIDS OH WHAT FUN WE HAD
BUT AT THE TIME IT SEEMED SO BAD
TRYING DIFFERENT WAYS TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE TO
THE DAYS.
REECEY
THE HEADMASTERS HAD ENOUGH TODAY
MR JESMOND ALL THE KIDS HAVE GONE AWAY

GONE TO FIGHT WITH NEXT DOORS SCHOOL
REECEY
(shrugs) EVERY TERM THAT IS THE RULE.
GANG
SITS ALONE AND BENDS HIS CANE

SAME OLD BACKSIDES AGAIN
REECEY
ALL THE SMALL ONES TELL TALL TALES

WALKING HOME AN SQUASHING SNAILS.
OH WHAT FUN WE HAD
BUT DID IT REALLY TURN OUT BAD
ALL I LEARNT AT SCHOOL WAS HOW TO BEND NOT BREAK
THE RULE.
SCHOOLKIDS
OH WHAT FUN WE HAD

TRYING DIFFERENT WAYS
TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE TO THE DAYS.
(MR JESMOND enters and the desks swing to him. A fag packet is thrown into
the desk.)
MR JESMOND The last day of school is in so many ways the first day of the rest of your life.
(Under . . . ) And here Id urge you to remember the prospects that . . .
23
OUR HOUSE
SCHOOLKIDS
(counting the clock down) EIGHT. SEVEN. SIX. FIVE. FOUR, THREE,
TWO, ONE . . .
( . . . the bell goes . . . )
MASSED
SCHOOLKIDS
(strike the pose) FREEDOM-M!

(Music continues THE DANCE OF THE LAST DAY AT SCHOOL)
SCHOOLKIDS
LOTS OF GIRLS AND LOTS OF BOYS

LOTS OF SMELLS AND LOTS OF NOISE
PLAYING FOOTBALL IN THE PARK
KICKING PUSHBIKES AFTER DARK.
BAGGY TROUSERS, DIRTY SHIRTS
PULLING HAIR AND EATING DIRT
TEACHER COMES TO BREAK IT UP
BACK OF THE HEAD WITH A PLASTIC CUP.
(Everyone goes angelic. White light.)
SCHOOLKIDS
(Contd)
(hands together, choir-like) OH WHAT FUN WE HAD

BUT DID IT REALLY TURN OUT BAD
ALL I LEARNT AT SCHOOL
WAS HOW TO BEND NOT BREAK THE RULE.
(Normal music returns.)
SCHOOLKIDS
(Contd)
OH WHAT FUN WE HAD

BUT AT THE TIME IT SEEMED SO BAD.
TRYING DIFFERENT WAYS TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE TO THE
(Dance Break.)
SCHOOLKIDS
(Contd)
OH WHAT FUN WE HAD

24
OUR HOUSE

TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE TO THE
REECEY
WELCOME TO THE LIONS DEN,

TEMPTATIONS ON HIS WAY
TEMPTATIONS ON HIS WAY . . .
+ BAD JOE

TEMPTATIONS ON HIS WAY
TEMPTATIONS ON HIS WAY . . .
+ SCHOOLKIDS (2)
BAGGY TROUSERS. BAGGY TROUSERS.
BAGGY TROUSERS. TEMPTATIONS ON HIS WAY
BAGGY TROUSERS. BAGGY TROUSERS
BAGGY TROUSERS. TEMPTATIONS ON HIS WAY
+ SCHOOLKIDS (3)
(Contd)
SCHOOLS OUT
NA NA NA NA NA NA NA
SCHOOLS OUT
NA NA NA NA NA NA NA
ALL
(rising) WOH-H-H-H-H
HAH! HAH! HAH! HAH! HAH! HAH!
OH WHAT FUN WE HAD
TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE TO THE BAGGY TROUSERS. BAGGY TROUSERS.
BAGGY TROUSERS.
NA NA NA NA-A-A-A
W-OI!
(A tableau centred round BAD JOE and REECEY, arms round each other.)
25
OUR HOUSE
SCENE RAYS CAR PARLOUR

MUSIC NO 5a: SIMPLE EQUATION (Reprise)
(DAD enters with bunting.)
DAD
(colla voce) ITS A SIMPLE EQUATION YOU GOTTA EXPECT

(Whilst doing this, DAD sets up some car showroom bunting, and as he does, sets
the doors to spin . . . spin . . . spin and all TURN TO WHITE. DAD now
controls all we see. And we are now in the GOOD JOE story.)
CORRECTIONAL INSTITUTES MAKE YOU CORRECT.
SURELY YOURE GOING TO EMERGE IN A WORLD
WHERE YOURE ON THE RIGHT PATH - RIGHT MATES . . .
RIGHT GIRL?
(On come EMMO and LEWIS in brightly-coloured jump suits. Music ends.)
EMMO
This is NUTS. This is just - why the hell are we at work on the day Joe gets
out?
LEWIS
Well largely because todays also our first day in this job, and thats not a
great day to take a sickie.
(A shark con man of 43, RAY, comes on.)
RAY
(in one breath) Right. The art of car-washing is a much maligned and
underestimated art, theres far more to it than sloshing water on, waxing the
bonnet and rubbing tyre-black on the wheels Im lying of course, theres the
water, the wax an the tyre black, off y go.
(RAY goes straight off again.)
LEWIS
Told y there wouldnt be a long training period.
EMMO
He hasnt even asked about me GCSE results. I mean I could be anyone. I

could just run off with this bucket.
26
OUR HOUSE
(Theres a car honk-k the other side. They look . . . )

EMMO
Ohhhh my Goddd its not, please tell me its not-t-t . . .

(REECEY strides across the stage.)
REECEY
Alright girls?
EMMO
+ LEWIS
(immediately try to be cool) Alright Reecey.

(REECEY gets and takes a phone call . . . )
BILLIE
(entering) Well well well.
ANGIE
Its the water monkeys.
EMMO
(s.v.) Why dyou bring Reecey here to get his car washed?
LEWIS
That is so unfair. You knew it was our first day.
ANGIE
No we didnt.
BILLIE
Did we?
BILLIE
+ ANGIE
Oh no, we did.
(SARAH rushes in, dragging GOOD JOE).
SARAH
GUYS, GUYS! Look whos back!
EMMO
+ LEWIS
Heyy-y!
(EMMO and LEWIS run towards him, then remember theyre blokes and shake
his hand.)
BILLIE
Well well.
27
OUR HOUSE
ANGIE
So Joe. How was prison?
SARAH
It wasnt prison. It was a Young Offenders Institute.
BILLIE
Right. (Nods to ANGIE.) Starter Prison.
EMMO
Hey yeah. Dy get beat up with socks full of snooker balls, an is there like
one bloke who gets stuff sent in from outside an you all have to give him a
bit of your chocolate and his cells got a carpet and all the warders are nicer
to him an hes called like King or something?
GOOD JOE
No.
EMMO
(genuinely disappointed) Shame.
GOOD JOE
You learn things, mate. Thats what its like.
ANGIE
(archly) Oo really? You did exams?
GOOD JOE
(patiently) Ydont have to have exams to do every job in the world, do y?
BILLIE
Thats true.
BILLIE
+ ANGIE
(gestures EMMO and LEWIS) Ta-da-a-a!
LEWIS
(points) Hey yeah! We could have a word with Ray!
EMMO
(cockily) Yeah, see the art of car-washing is a much maligned art . . .
REECEY
Alternatively
(They all turn as REECEY swaggers forwards, pocketing his phone.)
. . . he could come and work with me. (Smiles.) As it happens Im starting
up a little business venture.
GOOD JOE
Its . . . okay, Reecey. Im not getting into any of that. (To the others.) See,
what they teach y in there is pride. (Grandly.) So ycan come out an stand
in front the world and say Hey. (Gestures himself.) My names Joe Casey.
Ex-young offender. Take me or leave me!
28
OUR HOUSE
SCENE CAREERS OFFICE

MUSIC NO 6: EMBARRASSMENT
(REECEY theatrically reveals an Employment Office worker, the CAREERS
OFFICER.)
CAREERS
OFFICER
RECEIVED A LETTER JUST THE OTHER DAY.
GOOD JOE
Here we go!
REECEY
(takes letter, in mock surprise)

DONT SEEM THEY WANNA KNOW YOU NO MORE.
GOOD JOE
Ywhat?
REECEY
THEY LAID IT DOWN GIVING YOU THEIR SCORE

WITHIN THE FIRST TWO LINES IT BLUNTLY READ . . .
(He rather cockily passes it to ANGIE).
ANGIE
(takes it and reads) YOURE NOT TO COME SEE US NO MORE.
BILLIE
KEEP AWAY FROM OUR DOOR
BILLIE
+ ANGIE
GOOD JOE
DONT COME ROUND HERE NO MORE.

WHAT ON EARTH DID Y DO THAT FOR?
Eh?
SCENE CASEY STREET

EMMO
(indicates door opening)

OUR AUNT SHE DONT WANNA KNOW, SHE SAYS . . .
AUNT
(opens door on . . . )
WHAT WILL THE NEIGHBOURS THINK? THEYLL THINK . . .
29
OUR HOUSE
NEIGHBOURS WE DONT.
AUNT
THATS WHAT THEYLL THINK
NEIGHBOURS WE DONT.
AUNT
BUT I WILL, CAUSE I KNOW THEY THINK I DONT.

(LEWIS opens a door on a SHABBY SLOB OF AN UNCLE drinking beer in his
vest, scratching his bollocks.)
LEWIS
OUR UNCLE HE DONT WANNA KNOW, HE SAYS
SHABBY
UNCLE
WE ARE A DISGRACE TO THE HUMAN RACE . . .
LEWIS
HE SAYS . . .
SHABBY
UNCLE
HOW CAN YOU SHOW YOUR FACE

WHEN YOURE A DISGRACE TO THE HUMAN RACE?
(Underscore continues. SARAH pep-talks GOOD JOE as a MAN IN A DOG
COSTUME appears at a desk.)
SARAH
Go on. Best of luck. Keep smiling. (She kisses him and goes.)
DOG MAN
Joe, seriously its great youre interested in being a shelf stacker here at
Oscars Toy Farm. You think youd fit in?
GOOD JOE
Oh definitely. I love this kind of environment.
DOG MAN
Great!
GOOD JOE
I love kids. Ive got enormous commitment.
DOG MAN
Hoo hoo!
(Underscore stops.)
30
OUR HOUSE
GOOD JOE
(ebulliently) Im also very proud to stand here in front of you and say that
Im a reformed young offender.
(Pause. The DOGS ears shoot up. Two SECURITY GUARDS burst in.)
SECURITY
GUARDS
GOOD JOE
SECURITY
GUARDS
BILLIE
+ ANGIE
NO COMMITMENT, YOURE AN EMBARRASSMENT

YES AN EMBARRASSMENT, A LIVING ENDORSEMENT.
Get off, just
THE INTENTION THAT YOU HAVE BOOKED

WAS AN INTENTION THAT WAS OVERLOOKED.
THEY SAY STAY AWAY
DONT WANT YOU HOME TODAY
KEEP AWAY FROM OUR DOOR
DONT COME ROUND HERE NO MORE.
(KATH appears.)
KATH
OUR DAD DONT WANNA KNOW, HE SAYS . . .
GRANDAD
THIS IS A SERIOUS MATTER.
GOOD JOE
Grandad? Come on mate
GRANDAD
TOO LATE TO RECONSIDER

NO-ONES GONNA WANNA KNOW Y.
GOOD JOE
(goes to his mum) OUR MUM (she . . . )

(EMMO and LEWIS intercede.)
EMMO
SHE DONT WANNA KNOW, SHE SAYS . . .
LEWIS
IM FEELING TWICE AS OLD, SHE SAYS . . .
31
OUR HOUSE
EMMO
EMMO
+ LEWIS
THOUGHT SHE HAD HER HEAD ON HER SHOULDER
CAUSE IM FEELING TWICE AS OLDER

IM FEELING TWICE AS OLDER
(SARAH pep-talks GOOD JOE as a MAN IN A CLOWN COSTUME walks in
and sits at a desk.)
SARAH
Right you bloody knock em dead. At least this time yr not gonna be
interviewed by a dog.
CLOWN
Okay so then, Mister Casey, what makes you think youd make a good
waiter here at The International House Of Waffles?
GOOD JOE
Well I love meeting people, Im very hard-working and Im quick to learn.
CLOWN
(ticks, nods) Uh-huh.

(Underscore stops.)
GOOD JOE
Im also very proud to sit here and say that Im a reformed young offender.
(The CLOWN looks up, suddenly rigid. The top of his hat flips back on a hinge
with a spring sound and a banana on a spring shoots out.)
EVERYONE
YOURE AN EMBARRASSMENT.
Blackout.
SCENE SUBURBAN HOUSE

MUSIC NO 6a: EMBARRASSMENT Playoff
DAD sets the doors spinning . . . spinning . . . and stops them on black. We are now in the
BAD JOE story. Out of this blackness appears PRESSMAN, a seemingly avuncular businessman. A
businesswoman, HEATHER, walks on. Underscore ends.)
32
OUR HOUSE
HEATHER
Oh Mister Pressman?
DAD
This is where you have to watch out now, Joe.
HEATHER
Mister Pressman!
DAD
Some people in the dark half of this world dont look half as dark as they
are. Some look nice as pie.
(PRESSMAN turns, nice as pie.)
PRESSMAN
Heather-r!
HEATHER
If youd like to meet . . . this is the Sales Manager for London Alarms.
(BAD JOE walks on, looking a million dollars, relatively. Well groomed, hair
slicked back, black suit.)
BAD JOE
Caseys the name. Joe Casey.
PRESSMAN
Good God. Hardly looks old enough to be a manager.
BAD JOE
No, well. To be honest I left school early to start this company. A friend and
I decided the world of business seemed exciting, we were sixteen and . . .
why wait?
PRESSMAN
(smiles, nods) Is that right. (A beat.) Well I didnt stay at school either,
Mister Casey. It never did me any harm. Fair play to y. (His mobile rings.)
Ill leave you in the very capable hands of Heather who deals with all my
property.
HEATHER
Okay, goodbye, Mister Pressman.
BAD JOE
(points) Sorry is that . . . ? Are these . . . (houses) . . . ? Pressman as in . . .

that you see up on cranes?
HEATHER
As in Pressman Developments.
BAD JOE
Wow. Is he moving here?
33
OUR HOUSE
HEATHER
No, no, this ones actually a birthday present hes bought for his secretary.
BAD JOE
He buys houses for his staff?
HEATHER
(a beat, then wryly) It usually buys him something back.
BAD JOE
(beat) Anyway. Ive been er all round the property and I have to say the
existing alarm layout is pretty sufficient.
HEATHER
Really?
BAD JOE
Absolutely. The only loophole is (Checks clipboard.) that one single unalarmed downstairs window. But the chances of anyone discovering that are
very slight.
MUSIC NO 6b: BAGGY TROUSERS (Underscore)

HEATHER
Right.
BAD JOE
Or the fact the utility room has no alarm sensor.
HEATHER
No.
BAD JOE
Or the fact that theres a slight weakness in . . .

(BAD JOE walks from one scene into . . . )
SCENE THE IRISH THEME PUB

( . . . the pub where waits REECEY.)
BAD JOE
. . . the existing alarm layout where someones put a stud wall in front of the
infra red, allowing un-monitored access into the lounge and garage.
(REECEY stands, putting some gloves on.)
REECEY
Cheers mate. Told y this little business idead work.

(REECEY leaves past EMMO and LEWIS, who pile in.)
34
OUR HOUSE
REECEY
Night, girls.
LEWIS
What the hell are you doing?
EMMO
I thought you didnt want to end up housebreaking like yr dad. (Underscore ends.)
JOE
(fingers to lips) Ap ap ap!

(BAD JOE produces letter.)
MUSIC NO 7: EMBARRASSMENT (Reprise Encouragement Version)

BAD JOE
RECEIVED A LETTER JUST THE OTHER DAY.
HEATHER
WEVE HAD SECOND THOUGHTS ABOUT THAT ALARM SYSTEM.

WE HAD A MINOR BREAK IN THURSDAY NIGHT. SO ER . . .
PERHAPS YOU MIGHT LIKE TO GIVE US A QUOTE FOR . . . (The
alarms?)
BAD JOE
Here we go boys!
(The BOSS OF LONDON ALARMS enters with some ceremony.)
(Similarly-clad SALES REPS pile in.)
SALES REPS
OOO AHH, etc.
LONDON
ALARMS BOSS HERE HE IS. THE RISING STAR JOE CASEY.
AS DISTRICT MANAGER HERE AT LONDON ALARMS LET ME
CONGRATULATE YOU ON THESE JANUARY SALES FIGURES
FOURTEEN IS A COMPANY RECORD.
JOE
This isnt crime! This is enterprise culture!
SALES REPS
OOO AHH, etc.

HES AN ENCOURAGEMENT,
A LIVING ENDORSEMENT.
THE PROMISE THAT HE HAS SHOWN,
THIS IS THE START OF A LONG-TERM RELATIONSHIP.
35
OUR HOUSE
(Dance break, ending with . . .)

SALES REPS
OOO AHH, etc.

HES AN ENCOURAGEMENT,
OOO AHH.
(DAD executes a magical switch from the hugely successful BAD JOE into . . . )
SCENE WEST END STREET

. . . GOOD JOE, standing dully on a street corner with a sign saying GOLF SALE, with a
large arrow, on his head. We are now in the WHITE WORLD.
BILLIE
+ ANGIE
Joe Caseyy-y!
GOOD JOE
Oh God. Oh God. Oh God oh God. (Tries to be super-casual.) Billie. Angie. Hi.

(A beat.)
BILLIE
(coolly) Joe, look I know this sounds crazy, but I really fancy some tartan
trousers. (Looks round.) Dyou have any idea round here where I might be
able to get some?
GOOD JOE
(deadpan) Very good.
ANGIE
So after the unique feat of getting turned down for a job by a dog and a
clown, this is the job you told everyone you got in marketing?
GOOD JOE
Girls . . .
BILLIE
Wouldnt it be terrible if Sarah found out the terrible tartan truth.
GOOD JOE
(quickly) Dont tell her.
BILLIE
Especially nows shes at college.
GOOD JOE
Dont tell her.
36
OUR HOUSE
ANGIE
Whole new social circle. Mixing with all those high-rollers.
BILLIE
Like Callum, for instance, whose father owns a distillery.
GOOD JOE
(pause) Who?
ANGIE
Mind you, sayin that, Billie, it does seem for the first time Joe Caseys got a
real direction in life.
BILLIE
+ ANGIE
GOOD JOE
(deadpan, flatly) Wa hey.

Look Im trying to earn a quick bit of cash so I can do something for Sarahs
birthday.
(REECEY emerges, smoking.)
ANGIE
Hey well itd better be good, I tell y. Shes used to better things now.
GOOD JOE
If university was that glamorous she wouldnt be working weekends in a bar.

(BILLIE and ANGIE have gone, leaving REECEY in the shadows.)
BILLIE +
ANGIE (V.O.) (dully) Whatever.
REECEY
Hey Jo jo.
(GOOD JOE doesnt answer.)
MUSIC NO 7a: BAGGY TROUSERS / OUR HOUSE (Underscore)

REECEY
(Contd)
So tell me. How much have ygot to impress this girl?
GOOD JOE
Its not impressing. Its more . . . what Im doing is . . . is . . . (Pause,

quieter.) Eighty quid.
REECEY
(swallows) See that lovely little convertible Jaguar?
37
OUR HOUSE
(GOOD JOE peers.)

REECEY
(Contd)
Eighty quid, ycan borrow that for the day.
GOOD JOE
Is it yours?
REECEY
No. (Smiles.) But what a difference two minutes would make.

(He turns to GOOD JOE. He beams.)
REECEY
(Contd)
(tantalisingly) Vrum-vrooom.
GOOD JOE
Its okay, Reecey. Im not getting into all that. (Music pauses.) But you have
given us an idea. (Races off, turns.) This is gonna be the most brilliant
birthday present ever.
REECEY
(calls after him) Ywant a car, mate, Im telling y. Nothing impresses a

woman like cars. (Slight pause.) Except honesty. An personally Ive always
found cars easier. (Music begins again.)
SCENE CASEY STREET

Underscore continues. SARAH bounces out to that expectant underscore expecting a picnic,
all dressed in summer gear, shades, croptops, cans of lager.
SARAH
Her-r-r-e we go! One o Clock, corner of Casey Street Come on-n-n . . .

( . . . followed by a cynical, arms-folded BILLIE and ANGIE.)
BILLIE
Let me tell you, this is going to be your most disappointing birthday ever.
SARAH
Shut it-t . . .
ANGIE
You shouldve stayed at university and invited us to a massive party.
SARAH
Girls.
ANGIE
+ BILLIE
(immediate false grins) All smiles.
38
OUR HOUSE
ANGIE
Were here.
BILLIE
Ready for the spectacle.
ANGIE
+ BILLIE
Bring it on.
(A battered old Morris Minor coupe appears. Driving it is GOOD JOE with his
arms wide. EMMO and LEWIS in the back.)
GOOD JOE
Ha-hey!
BILLIE
+ ANGIE
Goodbye.
MUSIC NO 8: DRIVING IN MY CAR

SARAH
Get back here. Get back here! This is fantastic.

(SARAH bundles the protesting BILLIE and ANGIE into the car.)
GOOD JOE
BILLIE
+ ANGIE
IVE BEEN DRIVING IN MY CAR.

ITS NOT QUITE A JAGUAR.
(look at him, deadpan) You dont say.
GOOD JOE
I BOUGHT IT IN PRIMROSE HILL

FROM A BLOKE FROM BRAZIL.
LEWIS
Eighty quid.
ANGIE
That much?
GOOD JOE
IT WAS MADE IN FIFTY-NINE.
BILLIE
That new?
GOOD JOE
IN A FACTORY BY THE TYNE.
39
OUR HOUSE
ANGIE
Oh my God. Its Northern.
LEWIS
IT SAYS MORRIS ON THE DOOR

THE GPO OWNED IT BEFORE.
GOOD JOE
I DRIVE IN IT FOR MY JOB

THE GUVNOR CALLS ME A SLOB
BUT I DONT REALLY CARE.
BILLIE
+ ANGIE
You should.
GOOD JOE
GIVE ME SOME GAS AND THE OPEN AIR.
EMMO
Here we go-o-o-o-o . . . .
(All in, they set off. Wind blows their hair.)
GOOD JOE
EMMO
+ LEWIS
GOOD JOE,
EMMO
+ LEWIS
ITS A BIT OLD BUT ITS MINE.

I MEND IT IN MY SPARE TIME.
JUST LAST WEEK I CHANGED THE OIL
THE ROCKER VALVES AND THE COIL.
(nods) JUST LAST WEEK HE CHANGED THE OIL.
LAST WEEK IT WENT ROUND THE CLOCK

I ALSO HAD A LITTLE KNOCK.
GOOD JOE
I DENTED SOMEBODYS FENDER.
EMMO
+ LEWIS
HE LEARNED NOT TO PARK ON A BENDER.
BILLIE
HA HA (To ANGIE.) Get out.
40
OUR HOUSE
(Choreography of SARAH, loving it, preventing BILLIE and ANGIE from

leaving . . . )
LEWIS
You cant get out, its moving!
EMMO
(points) Tunnel!
ANGIE
What?
EVERYONE
Tunn-nelllll!!!
( . . . as the car goes into a tunnel, then onto a rollercoaster, into the sky . . . )
GOOD JOE
IVE BEEN DRIVING IN MY CAR

IT DONT LOOK MUCH, BUT IVE BEEN FAR.
I DRIVE UP TO MUSWELL HILL
IVE EVEN BEEN TO SELSEY BILL.
I DROVE ALONG THE A45
I HAD HER UP TO FIFTY EIGHT.
( . . . becomes the prow of the Titanic . . .
. . . battles through Star Wars . . .
. . . then back to earth.)
GOOD JOE
+ SARAH
I LIKE DRIVING IN MY CAR
BILLIE
+ ANGIE
HE LIKES DRIVING IN HIS CAR
GOOD JOE
+ SARAH
DONT LOOK MUCH BUT IVE BEEN FAR
BILLIE
+ ANGIE
DONT LOOK MUCH. Full stop.

(Much bickering and squawking to a final apocalyptic . . . )
GOOD JOE
(triumphantly) GOD I LOVE THIS CAR! (Music ends.)
41
OUR HOUSE
(Theres a bang from the engine. A thin Wile E. Coyote of smoke rises. The sisters
climb out as EMMO and LEWIS start to push it back.)
LEWIS
(gesturing for help) Emmo?
BILLIE
Anyway Sarah . . . (Deep breath.) . . .
BILLIE
+ ANGIE
(sing) HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU, HAPPY BIRTHDAY . . .
SARAH
Its STILL a great birthday!
EMMO
(pushing) We can push it back!
BILLIE
(going) Sorry. Dont do push.
ANGIE
(into mobile, going) Reecey. Guess whats happened.
EMMO
(pushing it away) Just get it up on the verge an we can call someone out.
LEWIS
(helping) Yeah what, like a priest?
SARAH
This is such . . . (Kisses him.) mmm! You know why I love that car? Because
it is so Joe Casey. It is just so you. Its just the . . .
GOOD JOE
(half smile) Its an embarrassment.
SARAH
(takes a beat, tries again) Listen Joe. At Christmas, at university they have
this big massive ball, this charity ball where everyone has to dress up in big
frocks and the blokes wear dinner jackets and Im on the organising
committee so I get two free tickets!
GOOD JOE
Sarah, I have to tell you the job I have in marketing is standing on a street
corner with a sign saying golf sale on my head.
SARAH
Right. (Swallows, pause.) Well I could hire a dinner suit for you!
GOOD JOE
(strokes her hair back) Its okay.
42
OUR HOUSE
SARAH
Serious. Now Ive got this weekend job in a bar on the Embankment. I
dont mind paying for you to . . .
GOOD JOE
Sarah. I dont want charity.

(He turns and goes.)
MUSIC NO 8a - I: MY GIRL Reprise (Ballad Version)

SARAH
WHY CANT I EXPLAIN?

(Underscore takes the line: Why do I feel this pain?)
SARAH
(Contd)
EVERYTHING I SAY HE DOESNT UNDERSTAND

HE DOESNT REALISE
HE TAKES IT ALL . . .
(DAD enters, turning all the doors to black. We are now in the BLACK
WORLD and in a showroom.)
SCENE JAGUAR SHOWROOM

SARAH
+ DAD
. . . THE WRONG WAY.
MUSIC NO 8a - II: DRIVING IN MY CAR Reprise (Big Band Version)

(BAD JOE, sharp as a knife, gelled-back hair, is shown his car by a POSH
SALESMAN as DAD sings.)
DAD
HES BEEN DRIVING IN HIS CAR.
SALESMAN
Here we are sir, I think youll like this one, its a twin carb four litre petrolengined . . .
DAD
(looks over JOEs shoulder at the spec.) IT IS INDEED A JAGUAR
43
OUR HOUSE
BAD JOE
IT SAYS V8 ON THE DOOR.

FINISH, TRIM . . .
DAD
. . . AND A CORRIDOR.
SALESMAN
CLIMATE-CONTROLLED AUTOMATICLY.
BAD JOE
Very nice. Veryyyy nice!

(Music breaks.)
SCENE CASEY STREET

BAD JOE
Its a great day mum!
KATH
Oh look at YOU! My God, will you look at this SUIT!
BAD JOE
I dont sell alarms anymore. Im like me great grandad. Yve got another
builder in the family now!
KATH
(reads card) Casey Properties.
BAD JOE
(chucks her cheek) Promise you mum, itll be massive one day. Itll be up
there on cranes like Pressmans.
KATH
Youre a developer?
BAD JOE
(slight pebble in shoe) Builder. Developer.
KATH
Does that mean Ill get to see even less of you?
BAD JOE
I promise you mum, youll be proud of that name.
KATH
I am already.
BAD JOE
Not only that . . .
KATH
I said, I am al - . . .
44
OUR HOUSE
BAD JOE
Ive set Emmo and Lewis up in a limousine business!
SCENE RIVERSIDE COCKTAIL BAR

(Drum roll and cymbal crash.)
EMMO +
LEWIS (O.S.)
Ladies and Gentlemen-n-n-n . . .
BAD JOE
(points) I give yo-o-ou . . . !

(EMMO and LEWIS swagger out, wearing chic light grey chauffeur outfits.)
EMMO
+ LEWIS
(no accompaniment) WEVE BEEN DRIVING IN OUR CAR
BAD JOE
Hahahahaheyyyy! (Points.) Whats it got, boys?
EMMO
+ LEWIS
FISH TANK AND A CINEMA.
MUSIC NO 8b: AFTER DRIVING IN MY CAR (Cocktail Piano)

BAD JOE
Tell me everything.
KATH
(leaving unmarked by JOE) Ill see y then.
EMMO
It is the biggest car . . .
KATH
Joe?
(BAD JOE sits at a table, all smiles to his mates. His mum just leaves.)
LEWIS
Five point eight litre. Genuine USA Left hand drive . . .
EMMO
LEWIS
Twenty eight thousand miles, only ever driven in California . . .
45
OUR HOUSE
EMMO
BAD JOE
Its a big car, is it Emmo?
EMMO
It is the biggest . . . (car . . . )
LEWIS
(shushes EMMO, quieter tone) Listen, Joe, I have to ask. All this money. The
limo, the money thats paid for the limo . . .
BAD JOE
(to avoid GIRLS hearing) Guys guys guys. The alarm scam just got me the
money to set up legit. I will never need to deal with scumbags like Reecey
again in my life.
(The waitress turns up in a chic cocktail waitress outfit. Its SARAH.)
SARAH
(writing in pad) Yes, gentlemen. What can I get you?
EMMO
(privately to LEWIS) God, she is a dead ringer for that girl we knew at school.
SARAH
(hearing it) It is me. Hello Emmo.
EMMO
Hey. (Points to his hat.) Surely what you mean is Hello E, of E and L
Limousines.
SARAH
(coolly) What a brilliant name.
EMMO
It stands for . . .
SARAH
I know what it stands for.
LEWIS
Were an investment of a young businessman.

(EMMO gives SARAH the business card.)
SARAH
So. Joe Casey getting into property. I seem to remember he was doing that
the last time we met. Cocktails?
BAD JOE
(gently) Please tell me you went to university.
46
OUR HOUSE
SARAH
Can I take your order?
EMMO
Hey. Whats it like, university? Is it like everyone just has sex with everyone
else like just all the time?
SARAH
You do jobs at weekends to afford it. Thats what its like. Order?
EMMO
Three of them melon ones.
SARAH
(goes) Thanks.
BAD JOE
Did you have a good birthday?

(Music fades. SARAH stops. And turns.)
SARAH
(pause, s.v.) I was on a committee all day for a charity ball.
BAD JOE
Can anyone come?
SARAH
(beat) Its for charity, Joe. Involves doing things for other people. Depends
if youre into that. (She goes.)
SCENE HAMPSTEAD TERRACE

MUSIC NO 8c: SIMPLE EQUATION Reprise
CHORUS
OOOOO AHHHH . . .
OOOOO AHHHH . . .
(DAD effects a sudden change into the WHITE WORLD, GOOD JOES. But
its eerie, as the night is dark. Things, in fact, seem grey.)
DAD
THE EQUATION STARTS SIMPLE, BUT IN THE LONG RUN . . .

(Beats.)
GETS HARDER TO RECOGNISE RAIN FROM THE SUN
(Beats.)
WRONG TURNING RIGHT . . .
Good turning bad?
47
OUR HOUSE
(One turn reveals the wolf in the woods . . . )

REECEY
Well well well.

(Underscore.)
GOOD JOE
Leave us alone eh, Reecey.
REECEY
Dont turn me away, Jo-jo. Its just a little job. I planned it all nice an
convenient. On your way home from work. Slightly open front window . . .
GOOD JOE
Look I told you Im not getting into any of that.
REECEY
(cuts to the chase) Itd pay for a DJ.

(GOOD JOE doesnt look at him.)
DAD
ALL I WANTED WAS A WORD . . .
REECEY
(Contd)
Not your fault you cant get a job.
DAD
AS YOU STAND WHERE I ONCE STOOD . . .
REECEY
(Contd)
Not your fault your dad doesnt own a distillery.

(GOOD JOES shoulders drop.)
GOOD JOE
What do I have to do?

(REECEY laughs and leads GOOD JOE into temptation . . . )
DAD
+ CHORUS
ITS THE DAYS THAT SEPARATE THE NIGHT.

THE SHADOWS BY WHICH WE RECOGNISE THE LIGHT.
48
OUR HOUSE
(A marquee front drops. Underscore continues.)

SCENE MARQUEE AT SARAHS COLLEGE
In burst BILLIE and ANGIE dressed to the nines in ball dresses.
BILLIE
Oh my God. Finally I start to live.
ANGIE
I am in a ball dress. I am in a university . . .

(SARAH rushes in, wearing a ball dress, with CALLUM, a Scottish student.)
BILLIE
+ ANGIE
Ha heyyy!
SARAH
Billie-e! Oh Callum! Billie and Angie, this is Callum. Organised this with
me.
CALLUM
(shakes) You must be her friends from Camden?
ANGIE
Islington.
BILLIE
Anyway-y. I bet theres some family history behind those trousers, am I

right?
(Huge APPLAUSE).
SARAH
Oh God the bands finished. Can you check the next . . . (band?)
CALLUM
Ill check the band! Yes captain. (Salutes, smiling.) Have a good night, ladies.
BILLIE
(points at CALLUM) Look at that.
SARAH
What?
ANGIE
Not wanting to say I told you so, but just imagine all those years back if
youd ended up going out with Joe Casey and then come to a place like this.
BILLIE
Itd be like being tied to a donkey in a field full of stallions.
49
OUR HOUSE
(The marquee flaps part dramatically to reveal BAD JOE in a DJ).

BAD JOE
(does cuffs, nods) Girls.

(Jaws drop audibly all round.)
BAD JOE
(Contd)
(hands over a cheque) Ydont mind? Ive brought a donation.
BILLIE
(takes it) Casey Properties?
SARAH
(reads it) Joe, you didnt have to do that.
BAD JOE
Yeah well thats the point of charity, isnt it? Besides. Dont want to waste
all these dancing lessons.
(The combo at the ball start playing.)
MUSIC NO 9: THE RETURN OF THE LOS PALMAS SEVEN

(BAD JOE holds his hand out to SARAH.)
SARAH
(shrugs) I cant. Seriously.

(BAD JOE does an okay of the eyes, and turns his hand to invite BILLIE or
ANGIE.)
BAD JOE
Girls?
ANGIE
Alas. Time to go.
BILLIE
Sorry. Dont do dance.

(BAD JOE and SARAH are alone.)
BAD JOE
(smiles) Let me teach you. This is the simplest dance in the universe.
(He starts to teach her, sometimes with audible little instructions, the steps his
DAD danced with KATH.)
50
OUR HOUSE
SARAH
Where did you learn all this?
BAD JOE
Camden International Academy Of Dance.
SARAH
Joe.
BAD JOE
Its above the Electric Rhino Sex Shop.
SARAH
Joe.
BAD JOE
Me mum taught me.

(And as she starts to get it together, the marquee blows away and allows us to
dance past the landmarks of contemporary London . . . the wheel. The dome.
Buckingham Palace . . . )
SCENE PICCADILLY CIRCUS

(SARAH finally stops, and pulls away.)
SARAH
Why did you come tonight?
BAD JOE
Id like to say its cause I support Oxfam.

(SARAH smiles.)
BAD JOE
(Contd)
God yknow I spent so long (Winces.) so many nights, back and back,
going back over that night in Camden Quays. Running away. Putting
myself before you.
(Music ends. Pause. They look at each other.)
BAD JOE
(Contd)
(slight pause) Biggest mistake I ever made.
SARAH
(pause) Yeah. It was. (She looks at him.)
51
OUR HOUSE
BAD JOE
Yknow sometimes I find myself fantasising I did the right thing that night.
An how brilliant life wouldve turned out.
(A thunderclap and the doors rotate to white. Were snapped into GOOD JOEs
story.)
MUSIC NO 10: SHUT UP

(GOOD JOE and REECEY thunder across the stage with a telly, pursued by
COPPERS.)
COPPER 1
Get the little scumbag!
REECEY
Run Jo-jo!
GOOD JOE
Reeeeceyy!
COPPER 2
Come on son, youre nicked.

(There is a chase.)
COPPER 3
Alright lads. Games up. Ive got him.
SCENE POLICE STATION

POLICE pile in and restrain REECEY and GOOD JOE.
REECEY
I TELL YOU I DIDNT DO IT, CAUSE I WASNT THERE
GOOD JOE
Eh?
REECEY
DONT BLAME ME, IT JUST ISNT FAIR.
GOOD JOE
Reecey?
REECEY
DONT LISTEN TO HIS SIDE, JUST LISTEN TO MINE

CANT THINK OF A STORY, SURE YOULL FIND ME SOMETIME.
NOW PASS THE BLAME AND DONT BLAME ME
JUST CLOSE YOUR EYES AND COUNT TO THREE
52
OUR HOUSE
COPPERS
ONE. TWO. THREE.
REECEY
THEN ILL BE GONE AND YOULL FORGET

THE BROKEN WINDOW, TV SET.
GOOD JOE
IT WASNT ME EITHER, (Nods to REECEY.) IM JUST HIS MATE.
REECEY
Mate? HE TOLD ME TO STAND HERE AND WATCH THE GATE.
GOOD JOE
No, no, no. He told me . . . (that - )
REECEY
IVE GOT A WIFE AND THREE KIDS YOU KNOW
GOOD JOE
No he hasnt. ( . . . He - )
REECEY
THEYLL TELL YOU IM STRAIGHT, AT LEAST I THINK SO.
GOOD JOE
Look officer, IM AS HONEST AS THE DAY IS LONG.
REECEY
(nods knowingly at JOE) Yeah right.

THE LONGER THE DAYLIGHT THE LESS I DO WRONG.
REECEY + JOE NOW PASS THE BLAME AND DONT BLAME ME

JUST CLOSE YOUR EYES AND COUNT TO THREE
(ONE, TWO, THREE,)
THEN ILL BE GONE AND YOULL FORGET
THE BROKEN WINDOW, TV SET.
ONE, TWO, THREE!
(Underscore.)
EMMO
Joe! Over here!
LEWIS
Were here for y, mate. We called Sarah (and . . . )
GOOD JOE
What?
EMMO
What?
GOOD JOE
You called Sarah?
53
OUR HOUSE
EMMO
Was that wrong?
GOOD JOE
You idiots. You brain dead, stupid . . .

(GOOD JOE flies at EMMO, who cant believe whats happening, like a child.)
LEWIS
Joe!
POLICEMAN
(restraining JOE) Dont push it.

(SARAH flies in, wearing a (different) ball dress with a blokes DJ over it.
STUDENT CALLUM is with her.)
SARAH
Joe! Whats happened?
GOOD JOE
Thanks, guys. Thanks so . . . (much.)
SARAH
They said yd broken into a house.
GOOD JOE
Whos this?
SARAH
What?
EMMO
(wounded to near tears) What did we do?
CALLUM
The names Callum.
LEWIS
(to EMMO) Sokay.
SARAH
They said youd been arrested (breaking into a house - )
CALLUM
(offers to shake) I just came out the ball with her.
SARAH
Why the hell . . . (did - ?)
GOOD JOE
(points at her clothing) Whose jacket?
SARAH
(looks a beat) Forget the jacket. Joe, why were you trying to break into a
house?
54
OUR HOUSE
GOOD JOE
Because we dont all have one of (Nods at CALLUMS jacket.) them lying
about.
SARAH
What?
GOOD JOE
(spoiling for a fight) Nice one, mate. Nice jacket.
SARAH
Oh, hey if I thought, when I had offered to pay . . . (for - )
GOOD JOE
So what, Sarah, so I walk round with (POINTS AT CALLUM) everyone

knowing you paid for your boyfriends clothing . . . (at - )
CALLUM
Whoa.
GOOD JOE
(turns like a rattlesnake) Sorry?
CALLUM
(smiling) I just think she meant . . . (that - )
SARAH
Joe.
EMMO
Joe, Im sorry we called her . . .
GOOD JOE
Sorry, go on. Tell me what my girlfriend meant.
SARAH
Stop it.
POLICEMAN
(pulls GOOD JOE back) Come on, sunshine.
CALLUM
I think Sarah . . . (was trying to be nice - )
GOOD JOE
(points) Dont use that name.
POLICEMAN
Oi.
EMMO
What is happening to you?
LEWIS
(bitterly) Forget it Emmo. Hes not worth it.
CALLUM
(eases SARAH back to safety) Come on, Sarah.
55
OUR HOUSE
(GOOD JOE launches at CALLUM and punches him flying. POLICE pile in.)
SARAH
+ LEWIS
Joe!
GOOD JOE
(to POLICEMAN) Get your hands off . . . (me - )

(GOOD JOE on instinct swings and decks the COPPER, who goes flying. Music
stops abruptly. A moment of silence where everyone just stands and takes stock of
what this act signifies.)
DAD
No, no, no. Dont hit a copper. Never hit a copper!
MUSIC NO 11: TOMORROWS JUST ANOTHER DAY / THE SUN AND THE RAIN
(As if in response, a load of PRISONERS appear.)
SCENE PRISON
GOOD JOE
No. Hold on.
PRISONERS
DOOBY DOO DOOBY DOO DOO DOO

DOOBY DOOBY DOOBY DOO DOO DOO . . . (x4)
(A prison starts to appear.)
SARAH
No, look, he doesnt belong with these lot! Hes not like them, hes not a
criminal.
COPPER
Oh well now look at this. Hes got form. Been in a correctional facility!
SARAH
Cause he did the right thing! Hes done the right thing all the . . . (way - )
GOOD JOE
I tell you what the right thing wouldve been, Sarah. When I was sixteen to
have never met you.
DAD
He doesnt meant that love.

(Slight pause. SARAH backs away and runs.)
56
OUR HOUSE
GOOD JOE
(instantly) I didnt mean that.
DAD
Love, seriously. He was just trying . . . (to - )
GOOD JOE
I was trying . . . I was just . . . I was just . . .
PRISONERS
TRYING HARD
I THOUGHT ID DONE MY BEST.
ALL MY LIFE
I CANT GET NO REST.
DOWN AND DOWN THERE IS NO UP
I THINK THAT IVE RUN OUT OF LUCK
GOOD JOE
I HEAR THEM SAY
PRISONERS
TOMORROWS JUST ANOTHER DAY.
GOOD JOE
I HEAR THEM SAY
PRISONERS
AND IT GETS BETTER EVERY DAY
GOOD JOE
I HEAR THEM SAY
PRISONERS
TOMORROWS JUST ANOTHER DAY

(GOOD JOE gets subsumed into the ranks of Prisoners . . . )
GOOD JOE
WALKING NOW OVER COVERED GROUND

THERE IS A CHANCE IF I MOVE AROUND
I NEED A MOMENT TO REFLECT
ON THE FRIENDSHIPS I HAVE WRECKED . . .
+ PRISONERS
I HEAR THEM SAY

I HEAR THEM SAY
IT GETS BETTER EVERY DAY.
I HEAR THEM SAY.
TOMORROWS JUST ANOTHER . . .
57
OUR HOUSE
DAD
IF BLACK IS WHITE, AN NIGHT IS DAY

AND PATHS WE TAKE STRETCH FAR AWAY
HOW CAN WE EVER HOPE TO CALL
WHICH WILL RISE AND WHICH WILL FALL?
BAD JOE
ITS RAINING AGAIN

(BAD JOE appears magically, the BLACK AND WHITE worlds co-existing!)
BAD JOE
(Contd)
A CRACK IN THE CLOUDS REVEALS BLUE SKIES

IVE BEEN FEELING SO LOW
BUT NOW EVERYTHING IS ON MY SIDE
THE SUN AND THE RAIN
(He puts an arm out.)
BAD JOE
(Contd)
WALK WITH ME, FILL MY HEART AGAIN.

(SARAH, in her ball dress, comes along Albert Bridge to join him. She has his
jacket as an umbrella.)
SARAH
+ BAD JOE
PRISONERS
I FEEL THE RAIN FALLING ON MY FACE

I CAN SAY THERE IS NO BETTER PLACE
THAN STANDING UP IN THE FALLING DOWN
IN SO MUCH RAIN I COULD ALMOST DROWN.
I HEAR THEM SAY
I HEAR THEM SAY
IT GETS BETTER EVERY DAY
I HEAR THEM SAY
I HEAR THEM SAY
I HEAR THEM SAY
I HEAR THEM SAY
58
OUR HOUSE
TOMORROWS JUST ANOTHER DOOBY DOO DOOBY DOO DOO DOO

DOOBY DOOBY DOOBY DOO DOO DOO.
SARAH
+ BAD JOE
PRISONERS
SARAH
+ BAD JOE
PRISONERS

I HEAR THEM SAY
I HEAR THEM SAY
I HEAR THEM SAY
I HEAR THEM SAY
I HEAR THEM SAY
I HEAR THEM SAY
TOMORROWS JUST ANOTHER (BAD JOE and SARAH kiss as GOOD JOE appears in prison. Its magical.)
OMNES

(Blackout. End of Act One.)
59
OUR HOUSE
ACT TWO
SCENE NORTHERN EGYPT

The sound of a boat horn in the darkness.
MUSIC NO 12: NIGHT BOAT TO CAIRO
VOICE
NIGHT BOAT TO CAIRO-OOOOOOO!

(Mist.The prow of a mysterious and ghostly boat appears, bobbing in the halflight it STOPS THE DOORS ON BLACK were in BAD JOEs story. DAD
is punting. SARAH and BAD JOE are aboard.)
DAD
ITS JUST GONE NOON HALF PAST MONSOON

ON THE BANKS OF THE RIVER NILE
HERE COMES THE BOAT, ONLY HALF AFLOAT
OARSMAN GRINS A TOOTHLESS SMILE.
(We dont not have an effing clue what the hell is happening. We are apparently
in Egypt.)
ONLY JUST ONE MORE TO THIS DESOLATE SHORE
LAST BOAT ALONG THE RIVER NILE
DONT SEEM TO CARE, NO MORE WIND IN HIS HAIR
AS HE REACHES HIS LAST HALF MILE.
THE OAR SNAPS IN HIS HAND BEFORE HE REACHES DRY LAND
BUT THE SOUND DOESNT DAMPEN HIS SMILE
JUST PRODS THE WET SAND WITH AN OAR IN HIS HAND
FLOATS OFF DOWN THE RIVER NILE
FLOATS OFF DOWN THE RIVER NILE.
(Music ends abruptly as JOE and SARAH get out.)
BAD JOE
God I love Las Vegas!

(Music crashes back in as DAD rows off.)
60
OUR HOUSE
MUSIC NO 12a: NIGHT BOAT (Vegas Underscore)

SARAH
Now we have kept this just the two of us, yeah?
BAD JOE
I in a sense.
SARAH
Joe-e . . . ?
BAD JOE
Look, Sarah, I tried. I REALLY tried but she pathologically organises people
to turn up.
(KATH comes in, dressed to the nines.)
KATH
Well bearing in mind this isnt The Church Of The Blessed Virgin and me
wedding car was a flaming gondola, I can only hope that your bridesmaids
are dressed for a good Catholic service.
SARAH
Bridesmaids?
(BILLIE and ANGIE appear in outrageous bridesmaids dresses. SARAH cant
BELIEVE IT - but shes pretty overjoyed to see them!)
BILLIE
OH MY GODDDDDD
ANGIE
OH MY GODDDD. I am in a designer dress. I am in Las Vegas. I have

achieved so much and Im only twenty one.
BILLIE
Best thing is our rooms much bigger than the one they gave his best men!
SARAH
Best men?
(EMMO and LEWIS rush in. Everyone is now 21.)
EMMO
(deadly serious) I have just seen a car . . .
LEWIS
We got rowed . . . to our room.
EMMO
I have just seen a car . . .
LEWIS
We got rowed . . . to our room.
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OUR HOUSE
EMMO
I have just seen a car so big it can never turn round.
BAD JOE
(hugs SARAH) You know how I promised you a paradise wedding?
BILLIE
+ ANGIE
(arms to heaven!) Honey, you got it!
SCENE A CARIBBEAN ISLAND PARADISE SET IN A HOTEL ROOM

MUSIC NO 13: WINGS OF A DOVE
(A small CARIB COMBO starts to play.)
CARIB COMBO TAKE TIME FOR YOUR PLEASURE
AND LAUGH WITH LOVE
TAKE THE HAND OF ANOTHER
AND SING FOR THE WINGS OF A DOVE.
WOH WOH FOR THE WINGS OF A DOVE.
BILLIE
+ ANGIE
ALL
LOOK UP AT THE ROOFTOPS

WHEN YOURE WALKING ROUND
DONT THINK FOR A MOMENT
OF LOOKING DOWN.
WOH WOH FOR THE WINGS OF A DO-O-O-OVE.
(A couple of well-turned out late middle aged Brits appear. Its MR AND MRS
PRESSMAN. No recognition as yet.)
BAD JOE
Excuse us can you take a photo?
MR PRESSMAN Sure.
62
OUR HOUSE
(He takes it, during which BAD JOE recognises him.)

BAD JOE
Mister Pressman? Isnt it? I sold you a house alarm once.
MR PRESSMAN Really?
BAD JOE
You told me how you hadnt stayed at school either. I even got into property
like you. North London. Took your lead.
MR PRESSMAN Is that right.

BAD JOE
Joe Casey.
MRS PRESSMAN God almighty Colin. Youve got a protegee!

MR PRESSMAN (half smiles) I like that. (Gets out a card.) Im looking for someone in North
London, Joe Casey! (Flicks it.) Call me.
BAD JOE
(beams to SARAH) Could this day get any better?
CARIB COMBO
+ GANG
LOOK UP AT THE ROOFTOPS
DONT THINK FOR A MOMENT
OF LOOKING DOWN.
A ROOM AT THE TOP
WHERE WERE NOT ALLOWED
CHEER TO THE ECHO
CAN YOU HEAR THE SOUND?
WOH WOH YEAH YEAH YEAH FOR THE WINGS OF A DOVE.
WOH WOH YEAH YEAH YEAH FOR THE WINGS OF A DOVE.
WOH WOH FOR THE WINGS OF A DO-O-OO-VE.
EVERYONE
YEAH
YEAH YEAH YEAH
YEAH YEAH YEAH
YEAH YEAH YEAH
YEAH YEAH YEAH
YEAH YEAH YEAH
YEAH YEAH YEAH
63
OUR HOUSE
YEAH YEAH YEAH

YEAH YEAH YEAH
WOH WOH
WOH WOH
WOH WOH YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH
WOH WOH WOH WOH WOH WOH!
(Dance Break)
EVERYONE
LOOK UP AT THE ROOFTOPS (OOOO HA)

DONT THINK FOR A MOMENT (OOOO HA)
OF LOOKING DOWN.
WOH WOH (YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH) FOR THE WINGS OF A
DOVE.
WOH WOH (YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH) FOR THE WINGS OF A
DOVE.
WOH WOH
FOR THE WINGS OF A DOVE!
SCENE PRISON GATES

MUSIC NO 14: ONE BETTER DAY
(New Years Day morning. Its freezing. Two massive prison gates open. One
solitary figure comes out with a pathetic plastic bag of possessions.)
DAD
ARLINGTON HOUSE
ADDRESS NO FIXED ABODE
AN OLD MAN IN A THREE-PIECE SUIT
SITS IN THE ROAD.
64
OUR HOUSE
HE STARES ACROSS THE WATER

AND SEES RIGHT THROUGH THE LOCK.
BUT ON AND UP LIKE OUTSTRETCHED HANDS
HIS MUMBLED WORDS, HIS FUMBLED WORDS.
SURROUNDED BY HIS PAST
ON A SHORT WHITE LINE
HE SITS WHILE CARS PASS EITHER SIDE
GOOD JOE
+ DAD
TAKES HIS TIME
DAD
TRYING TO REMEMBER
ONE BETTER DAY
A WHILE AGO WHEN PEOPLE STOPPED TO HEAR HIM SAY
GOOD JOE
WALKING ROUND YOU SOMETIMES

HEAR THE SUN SHINE
BEATING DOWN IN TIME WITH THE
RHYTHM OF YOUR SHOES.
(Underscore continues.)
SCENE CHURCH
KATH finishes praying as the PRIEST passes.
PRIEST
Kath? Any sign of Joe yet?

(KATH smiles a no.)
PRIEST
(Contd)
What did the prison say?
KATH
They say they let him out last Friday.
PRIEST
Hell come home, Kath.
KATH
(beat) Thats what you told me last time.

(KATH leaves.)
65
OUR HOUSE
DAD
DAD
+ GOOD JOE
+ CHORUS
CHORUS
SHES TRYING TO REMEMBER

ONE BETTER DAY
A WHILE AGO WHEN PEOPLE STOPPED TO HEAR HER SAY.
WALKING ROUND YOU SOMETIMES

HEAR THE SUNSHINE
RHYTHM OF YOUR SHOES
THE FEELING OF ARRIVING
WHEN YOUVE NOTHING LEFT TO LOSE.
AHHHH (etc.)
SCENE CASEY STREET

KATH leans in the doorway of the open house, desperate for her son to come back.
KATH
WALKING ROUND YOU SOMETIMES.
DAD
You are right in my shoes now, golden boy.
KATH
HEAR THE SUNSHINE.
DAD
I stood here after Id come out of prison.
KATH

RHYTHM OF YOUR SHOES.
DAD
Right there. Deeds in my hand thinking why not? Whens life ever shown
any pity on me, eh? If Im gonna sell it, why not break in an take anything
worth anything?
(We have GOOD JOE, hidden from KATHs view, along with KATH and DAD
on stage.)
DAD
Thats how low Id got, Joby. (Beat.) What I didnt expect to find was that
photograph (Swallows.) way back then.
66
OUR HOUSE
MUSIC NO 14a: OUR HOUSE (Reprise)

GOOD JOE
I REMEMBER WAY BACK WHEN

EVERYTHING WAS TRUE AND WHEN
WE WOULD HAVE SUCH A VERY GOOD TIME
SUCH A FINE TIME
SUCH A HAPPY TIME . . .
DAD
I REMEMBER HOW WED PLAY

SIMPLY WASTE THE DAY AWAY
THEN WED SAY
NOTHING WOULD COME BETWEEN US
TWO DREAMERS . . .
(Music ends.)
MR PRESSMAN
(O.S.)
Kath? Kath?
(MR PRESSMAN strides on. GOOD JOE hides and listens.)
PRESSMAN
Here we are then, Kath! (Arms out, smiles.) End of the road. Time to play
ball. All the others down this street have moved out.
KATH
Yeah well the others werent given their houses for ever, mister Pressman.
PRESSMAN
Oh Kath, Kath, Kath . . . How many times? There is no proof anywhere

that you were miraculously given this house.
KATH
(moves in) Look in my eyes, Mister Pressman. Look at the street name.
Thats all the proof Im gonna give y, you bastard. (She goes in.)
MUSIC NO 15: RISE AND FALL

PRESSMAN
(to the closed door) Great, well you can ask the court to look in your eyes,
sweetheart, but you might find they want to see some deeds. Which dont
exist. And no deeds means youre out. Street name or no street name.
(He pulls his coat collar up. And walks out past GOOD JOE, not even noticing
him.)
67
OUR HOUSE
GOOD JOE
THESE ARE THE STREETS I USED TO WALK

ON SUMMER NIGHTS SIT OUT AND TALK
THATS THE HOUSE WHERE I USED TO LIVE . . .
(He looks at the house, starting to get fire in his belly . . . )
GOOD JOE
(looks up at it) What if I saved this house, Mum? What if I saved Casey
Street for you? Dyou reckon a guy who saved his house deserves to come
home to it?
(Suddenly fired with resolve, the music surges like the mission in JOES breast.)
GOOD JOE
WE USED TO LIVE WHERE CHILDREN PLAY

THEYD LEAVE THEIR HOMES A MILE AWAY
TO COME AND STAND IN TREES AND GRASS
WHERE WE ONCE WALKED THE MEMORIES LAST
BEING HERE AGAIN
I CAN RECALL
FORGOTTEN MOMENTS
THE RISE AND FALL
THIS IS THE TOWN I WONT FORGET
AND AFTER ANGER, THERES NOTHING LEFT
WALKING NOW, ROUND AND ROUND
FAMILIAR SIGHTS ARE OPEN GROUND
BEING HERE AGAIN
I CAN RECALL
FORGOTTEN MOMENTS
THE RISE AND FALL
+ CITIZENS
THE SUN SHINES EAST, THE SUN SHINES WEST

BUT I KNOW WHERE THE SUN SHINES BEST
CASEY STREET IN THE AFTERNOON
ONCE AGAIN ITS OVER TOO SOON.
MUSIC NO 16: HOUSE OF FUN / RISE AND FALL / MY GIRL
SCENE RECEPTION OF PRESSMANS

The doors SPIN TO BLACK. As the citizens clear across the stage, were into BAD JOES
story. A pretty secretary, JULIE, at the front desk.
68
OUR HOUSE
JULIE
Yes. He can do three o clock next Tuesday. Thanks Jill.

(Recitative - style)
BAD JOE
GOOD MORNING, MISS.
JULIE
(starry-eyed) CAN I HELP YOU SIR?
BAD JOE
(hands over business card) YES IM MEETING MISTER PRESSMAN.

HE SAID HALF PAST NINE.
MY NAMES JOE CASEY
JULIE
(points) FROM LAS VEGAS.

CERTAINLY, THIS WAY PLEASE.
(JULIE leads BAD JOE out. Underscore.)
JULIE (Contd) (calls) Just take a seat in the atrium there sir. Theres newspapers and
journals and a cappuccino machine on your right. (To herself.) And if you
need help frothing your milk, I finish at six. (She buzzes.) Oh Mister
Pressman this is Julie in reception. The young mans here that you met in
America. Ive sent him through.
(Thunderclap. The doors SWING TO WHITE. Were in GOOD JOEs story.)
SCENE RECEPTION OF PRESSMANS
Morning bustle. A pretty secretary, JULIE, is at the front desk.
JULIE
He can do three o clock next Tuesday. Thanks Jill.
GOOD JOE
GOOD MORNING, MISS.
JULIE
(blankly, looks at this layabout. Pause three beats.) WHAT?
GOOD JOE
ID LIKE TO SPEAK TO MISTER (Checks card.) IS IT, PRESSMAN?
JULIE
(sighs, then points brusquely) RIGHT.

SIT THROUGH THERE. DONT TOUCH THE PLANTS.
(Shouts.) AN IVE COUNTED ALL THOSE MAGAZINES.
69
OUR HOUSE
(She leans after him.)

JULIE (Contd) (calls) I said dont touch the plants. On the left.
(Thundercrack. DOORS TO BLACK. Were in the BAD JOE story.)
PRESSMAN
COME IN.
(BAD JOE is there.)
PRESSMAN
(Contd)
Ah, JOE CASEY
BAD JOE
MISTER PRESSMAN.
PRESSMAN
FROM LAS VEGAS.
BAD JOE
THATS RIGHT.
PRESSMAN
MY PROTG PROPERTY DEVELOPER
BAD JOE
ITS IN THE BLOOD

MY FAMILY ALL WERE BUILDERS
PRESSMAN
WELL YRE GONNA MAKE THEM REALLY PROUD.
BAD JOE
God I hope I can I mean I . . .
PRESSMAN
A LITTLE STORY, JOE

THIS OLD ESTATE WERE BUILDING ON IS COUNCIL-OWNED.
WE CAN BOOT THEM OUT.
But, slight spanner in the works.
ONE HOUSE SEEMS TO BE A LITTLE RELUCTANT.
(Underscore, darker . . . )
PRESSMAN
One woman. Now I could drag her out, but frankly I could do without the
publicity . . . Specially seeing Ive got YOU, now! Local lad, knows the area,
explains things in a language shed understand. God, matey she probably knows
you! Number 25 Casey Street. Ring any bells? (He hands BAD JOE a card.)
70
OUR HOUSE
PRESSMAN
And if gentle persuasion doesnt work, give Danny a call.
BAD JOE
Danny?
PRESSMAN
Our last resort if we need a house to stop being an obstacle. (Smiles.) Hes
our little personal . . . fireman.
BAD JOE
(goes cold) I wont need fire. I wont need Danny.
PRESSMAN
(suddenly darker) On Friday the first the cranes go up.
BAD JOE
Ill do this by Friday the first.

(Music Rise and Fall)
PRESSMAN
(grips BAD JOE) AND IN THE EAST A NEW SON WILL RISE
PICTURE THIS, JOE, UP THERE CROSS CAMDEN SKIES.
PRESSMAN CASEY.
ON FRIDAY THE FIRST.
IF THAT WITCH IS OUT OF CASEY STREET.
(Pause.)
PRESSMAN
No link, I take it? Joe Casey Casey Street?

(Underscore stops dead. Pause. Hold this . . . )
BAD JOE
No.
(He leaves BAD JOE to the Judas-like moment of disclaiming his family name . . .
Then BAD JOE leaves and we SWING THE DOORS TO WHITE. Were in
GOOD JOEs story.)
SCENE MR PRESSMANS OFFICE

MR PRESSMAN, talking into a mobile.
PRESSMAN
Eight o clock. (Pause.) Marjorie, eight o clock is fine. Ive said Ill come and
Ill meet you outside. Yes. Right. I have to go now. Ive got someone coming
to see me.
71
OUR HOUSE
(GOOD JOE knocks and enters.)

PRESSMAN
(Contd)
Come in.
JOE COSEY.
GOOD JOE
CASEY.
PRESSMAN
CASEY. COME RIGHT IN, PLEASE DO. TELL ME WHAT YOU

WANT. THATS WHAT IM HERE FOR. OFF YOU GO.
GOOD JOE
RIGHT. LOOK. I MAY HAVE GOT THIS WRONG LAST NIGHT.

BUT I THOUGHT I OVERHEARD SOME PLANS FOR CASEY
STREET. NOW . . .
(JOE continues talking under.)
(Music My Girl)
PRESSMAN
MY WIFES MAD AT ME
I DIDNT WANT TO SEE THE FILM TONIGHT
SHE FINDS IT HARD TO TAKE
SHE THINKS IVE HAD ENOUGH OF HER
WHY CANT SHE SEE
SHES LOVELY TO ME
BUT TRAGICLY NOT AS NICE AS
JULIE IN RECEPTION WHOS NINETEEN
(Music stops dead.)
GOOD JOE
(Contd)
PRESSMAN
(stands) Were you even listening to me?

(a dreadful pause) For your information the last man who raised his finger to
me was very, very sorry he did it. Boys?
MUSIC NO 16a: SCENE CHANGE UNDERSCORE

GOOD JOE
What?
(Some HEAVIES wade in and throw GOOD JOE out of the door . . . )
72
OUR HOUSE
PRESSMAN
(Contd)
Can you escort Mister Cosey through the Very Special Visitors exit?
GOOD JOE
Wa-haaargh..
(GOOD JOE is thrown out through a fire door and disappears with a clang. MR
PRESSMAN grabs the phone.)
PRESSMAN
(into mobile) Danny? This is Harold Pressman. We have a small obstacle in

Casey Street.
(Ominous underscore.)
GOOD JOE
(half-bursts back in with HEAVIES) If you wanna fight, youve got it!
(The doors spin to black and instantly were in the BAD JOE story. This is a
SUPERFAST SWITCH.)
SCENE PRESSMAN DEVELOPMENTS PENTHOUSE

Underscore delivers the GANG into the flat, let in by BAD JOE who has a key to such places nowadays.
BAD JOE
In we come, in we com-me! Steady, steady! Dont miss look , see? Lights

in the steps dyou notice that? (Leads them in.) And here straight over
here! Principal feature of the maisonette . . . Juliet Balcony out over the
canal. How about that? How much would you pay for THAT boys?
ANGIE
Woww-w.
BILLIE
Didnt I tell you? Didnt I always say Joe Casey was a hot catch who was
gonna come good?
SARAH
No. You said he was a worthless no-hoper who was surrounded by gormless
prats.
EMMO
(laughs) Meaning who?

(They all look at him.)
73
OUR HOUSE
BAD JOE
Now then. Friday the first. Special day.
LEWIS
Auntie Kaths birthday. Tell y what were gonna give her. All night out in
the limo. Round the West End. What dy reckon?
BAD JOE
Brilliant. (Smiles.) What dy think of mine?

(It takes them all a few moments to realise . . . he means this flat.)
For all shes done for everyone over the years! For bringing me up without
dad. (To EMMO and LEWIS.) Taking these two in an bringing them up like
her own kids . . .
BILLIE
Joe, your mum is never gonna move out of Casey Street.
LEWIS
Its her castle.
BAD JOE
This IS Casey Street!
LEWIS
What?
BAD JOE
What its gonna be. Well, Boulevard.
BILLIE
Casey Boulevard?
ANGIE
Youre gonna knock down Casey Street?
BAD JOE
Its not knocking down its regeneration. Like Mister Pressman said,
things gotta fall for things to rise.
EMMO
Does she want to move?
LEWIS
(pointedly) No. Cause like I said. Its her castle.
BAD JOE
Yeah well itd stop feeling like a bloody castle if certain people stopped
treating it like one. (Beat.) Look. Its about safety, guys. For my mum, okay,
whos spent her life worrying about scum out the high rise she thought
were gonna break in. Well thered be gates, okay? Lights in the steps. (Arms
out.) All this. Marble. Stuff that looks like marble.
74
OUR HOUSE
LEWIS
Goodbye Joe.
(Pause. LEWIS starts to go.)
BAD JOE
Hey. HEY. Lewis. Can I remind you who bought you that limo.
LEWIS
You bought the limo Joe, not the driver.

(LEWIS picks his cap up and goes out. He nods to EMMO to follow.)
EMMO
Oh right. Are we . . . ? Were not . . . ? Right.

(EMMO follows.)
BILLIE
Actually can we scab a lift into town?

(They go too, pointedly. Pause.)
BAD JOE
And these are supposed to be our friends?

(SARAH doesnt respond. BAD JOE realises and tries to perk her up.)
BAD JOE
(Contd)
Honest to God, Sarah, I really think Mister Pressmans gonna take me on as

a partner for this. Can yimagine, Mum seeing that up on the cranes?
(Gestures.) Pressman Casey. (Pause.) Yeah?
(SARAH just looks at him.)
(s.v.) Bit of support, yeah? (He gathers his things to go.)
SARAH
You earn support, Joe. You dont marry it.

(He turns. He has no answer to that. So he just leaves.)
MUSIC NO 17: NW5

SARAH
I WATCHED YOU CLIMB UP

SAW YOU COME ALIVE
FROM VERY HUMBLE BEGINNINGS IN
NW5
75
OUR HOUSE
I HAVE HEARD YOU COME UP

BELIEVING YOUR OWN LIES
WITNESSED THE BLESSING RISE UP IN A
VERY STRANGE DISGUISE
THOUGH YOU HAVE BECOME A BURDEN
ONE THING REMAINS, THATS FOR CERTAIN
I WILL LOVE YOU ALL MY LIFE
BUT WITHOUT YOU IN MY LIFE
I WOULD GIVE YOU EVERYTHING
FOR JUST THAT SMILE YOU BRING
FOR JUST THAT SONG TO SING
FOR JUST THAT SONG TO SING . . .
DAD
I WATCHED YOU GROW UP

ONLY TO DESPISE
SAW THE MADNESS STACK UP THROUGH
TARPAULIN EYES
SARAH
THOUGH WE FACE THE FINAL CURTAIN

BUT WITHOUT YOU IN MY LIFE
SARAH + DAD I WOULD GIVE YOU EVERYTHING

(Underscore. In front of SARAH as she puts her coat on (DAD holds it for her
but she seems unaware) simultaneously we see BAD JOE and MR PRESSMAN
crossing.)
BAD JOE
(enters, laughing) . . . See the thing is, ANY other project (does a definite
gesture) one hundred per cent. But this Irish Estate mentioning it to my
friends, my wife, its a bit . . . Is there another maybe smaller project I could
maybe start on?
76
OUR HOUSE
PRESSMAN
SARAH
+ CHORUS
(suddenly loses all avuncularity) Hey. There is no other project Joe. An if

you cant hack this you might as well wimp out back to the minor league
and spend yr life doing up flats. Ive told you. If you cant do it with words,
do it with muscle. Use the card. Call Danny.

FOR JUST THAT SONG TO SING . . .
FOR THAT SMILE . . . (etc.)
(She goes. DAD closes behind her and SPINS THEM TO WHITE. Were in the
GOOD JOE story.)
SCENE VERY POSH LAW FIRM

MUSIC NO 17a: EMBARRASSMENT (Reprise Law Firm)
(A be-wigged BARRISTER strides in, confidently, with his CLERK.)
CLERK
(reading) RECEIVED A LETTER JUST THE OTHER DAY.
BARRISTER
Good.
CLERK
YOUNG MAN WANTS HELP WITH SOME MISSING HOUSE DEEDS
BARRISTER
Excellent.
CLERK
I GAVE HIM A NOTE OF OUR USUAL FEES.
BARRISTER
Tremendous.
GOOD JOE
AND HE SAYS HE HASNT GOT ANY MONEY.
77
OUR HOUSE
BARRISTER
GOODBYE.
(GOOD JOE is there.)
GOOD JOE
HELLO?
CLERK
YOURE NOT TO COME SEE US NO MORE.
GOOD JOE
But I havent even got in . . .
BARRISTER
KEEP AWAY FROM OUR DOOR. Shoo.

(GOOD JOE is backed out.)
CLERK
TRY HARPER SMITH MASSEY IN HAMPSTEAD.

SLIGHTLY SMALLER. YOUNGER. CHEAPER . . .
(The CLERK is replaced by . . . HARPER SMITH MASSEY, LAWYERS . . . three
LAWYERS in sharp suits, HARPER, SMITH and MASSEY.)
HARPER
TOTAL BASTARDS THOSE BIG-TIME DEVELOPERS. THEY JUST . . .
SMITH
THINK MONEY JUST BUYS THEM THE RIGHT . . .
MASSEY
AND CONNECTIONS, AND POWER.

GOD, THEY THINK MONEYS EVERYTHING.
GOOD JOE
(agreeing) AND THE THING IS IVE NO MONEY TO FIGHT THEM.

(Slight pause.)
ALL THREE
LAWYERS
(packing up) WELL THEN YOURE NOT TO COME SEE US NO MORE.
GOOD JOE
No. Hold on. Come back . . .
ALL THREE
LAWYERS
KEEP AWAY FROM OUR DOOR.
78
OUR HOUSE
(They all leave.)

SMITH
(hangs back) TRY THAT LEGAL AID PLACE.
HARPER
CAMDEN HIGH STREET
MASSEY
USED TO BE THE ELECTRIC RHINO SEX SHOP.

(They are replaced by . . . CAMDEN HIGH STREET LAW FIRM . . . a frazzled
tie-wrenched HARRASSED SMALL TIME LAWYER.)
SMALL TIME
LAWYER
Right so lets just weigh up what we got here.

ON THE ONE SIDE, MULTI-MILLION POUND DEVELOPERS.
(Looks.) ON THE OTHER, A BLOKE ON LEGAL AID.
(He massages his approaching migraine at the temples. Then sun comes out.)
SMALL TIME
LAWYER
(Contd)
I think Ill give this to our trainee. Sarah!

(Music stops. A girl replaces the SMALL TIME LAWYER. She is on the phone,
struggling with loads of papers, clearly under the kosh. It is SARAH.)
SARAH
Yes yes. Okay ten minutes. Tell them to come up now. Ive a client half past
and then . . .
(CALLUM enters and hugs SARAH while shes on the phone.)
CALLUM
Sarah? Lunch!
SARAH
. . . oh God, Im in Camden Magistrates Court on that police bail thing . . .
CALLUM
(nuzzling her) Lu-u-unchy lunch . . .
SARAH
(to CALLUM, s.v., laughing) I cant see them until about . . . (To CALLUM.)
Stop it-t! . . . Four. Okay. Thanks, Sue. (Phone down.) Callum, you cant
just come in here annn hrmmmm . . .
79
OUR HOUSE
(CALLUM kisses her. She gives in and kisses him back. GOOD JOE looks down.)
SARAH
(Contd)
(sees GOOD JOE) Joe?
CALLUM
Eh?
(They have both turned. GOOD JOE is sheepish, to CALLUM.)
GOOD JOE
Let me remind y. Get yr hands off my girl. (He does a little mime of the
strike.)
CALLUM
(hands up, mock) Oh my God. Joe Casey. Dont hit me again.
GOOD JOE
Sorry about all that, mate.
CALLUM
(shakes) Hey.
SARAH
What are you doing here, Joe?
GOOD JOE
I need a lawyer.
SARAH
Oh God. Now whatve you done?
GOOD JOE
No, no, no. Im trying to save Casey Street cause theres this guy who says
he can kick me mum out unless the house . . . and . . . and theres no proof
and she . . . we . . . (Pause.) Maybe Id better try another solicitors.
SARAH
No, no. Hold on. (Turns to CALLUM.) Callum, you have to go.
CALLUM
Charming.
SARAH
No, I mean Billie and Angie are coming up with the wedding dress. Its
incredibly bad luck.
CALLUM
Oh right, fair enough. See y later, mate. (He does a playful mock-scrap with
JOE on the way out.)
(CALLUM goes. A beat.)
80
OUR HOUSE
GOOD JOE
Wedding. Congratulations. (Pause.) I think Ive been here before. Used to

be the Electric Rhino Sex Shop. Emmo and Lewis once bought me a
condom from here that played a tune.
SARAH
(points, realising, slowly) Ohhhhmygodddd that WAS you. That WAS you
playing the Power Of Love out of your back pocket.
(SARAH laughs. GOOD JOE does too, then just watches her laughing. It dies.
SARAH looks at him.)
MUSIC NO 17b: UNDERSCORE (My Girl / NW5 / Simple Equation)

GOOD JOE
The night I hit Callum I said I wished Id never met you. (Beat, shakes head.)
Was such a lie. Its impossible for anyone to wish that. Every second people
spend with you, Sarah, it makes their lives better.
SARAH
(s.v.) Stop, Joe. Please.

(Pause. This is really awkward.)
GOOD JOE
Ill save Casey Street, Sah. You just go off an be happy. (Beat.) I never met
anyone who deserves to be happy more than you.
(He looks at her. Then GOOD JOE turns and goes. SARAH is left alone.)
SARAH
CAN YOU RAISE A FINAL CURTAIN?

WITHOUT YOU IN MY LIFE . . .
(suddenly picks up phone) Sue, cancel the two o clock. Somethings come up.
(We lose the light on SARAH. The doors spin. We go to black. Were in the
murky world of BAD JOES story.)
SCENE ALLEY
Underscore continues. All is low light. DAD is there.
BAD JOE
Danny?
81
OUR HOUSE
(A shadow in the darkness.)

BAD JOE
(Contd)
Is that Danny? Harold Pressman gave me this number. Is your name

Danny?
REECEY
The Christian one. (He emerges into the light of the neons. Its REECEY.)
BAD JOE
Reecey! What the hell are you doing here?
REECEY
Hello Jo-jo. Working for Harold Pressman. Same as you. I heard youd gone
legit. (Smiles.) Or are you about to prove otherwise?
(Pause.)
BAD JOE
On the night of Friday the first, no-one will be in at number twenty five
Casey Street. Some lads are taking the owner round the West End in a limo
for her birthday.
REECEY
Twenty five? Isnt that your house, Joby?

(REECEY smiles a sort of bloody hell, thats a good one face and clicks his fingers
for the money.)
DAD
How low does a man have to be to sell his own house and break (in . . . )
BAD JOE
Break in. I just need you to break in, Reecey. Nothing else. I just need that
house to stop feeling a safe place to be.
REECEY
I have done this before, Casey. Half now. You meet me with the other half
at Camden Lock immediately after its done.
BAD JOE
(beat, pauses handing it over) I just need it to stop feeling like a castle.
(REECEY snatches the money.)
REECEY
Camden Lock, Jojo.

(REECEY and BAD JOE go their different ways.)
82
OUR HOUSE
DAD
+ CHORUS
ITS THE SIMPLE EQUATION OF WRONG VERSUS RIGHT

THE TERROR OF STANDING, ONE NORTH LONDON NIGHT
THINKING YOUD CHOSEN TO RUN THE RIGHT WAY,
AND NOW WATCHING RIGHT GOING WRONG.
WHITE GOING GREY.
SHOW ME NOW, WHICH WAYS HIGH?
IS THIS EARTH? IS THAT THE SKY?
AND IF I KNEW, IF THINGS WERE CLEAR
COULD I EVEN MAKE HIM HEAR?
(During this DAD SPINS THE DOORS to WHITE. Were in GOOD JOES
story.)
SCENE MORRIS MINOR, CAMDEN BACK STREET

GOOD JOE is sleeping in the battered old Morris. Both doors are missing from this and its in a
real state.
GOOD JOE
Dad?
SARAH (O.S.)
Joe?
(SARAH appears, looking wrecked. GOOD JOE almost jumps, frightened and
caught.)
GOOD JOE
Sarah? What are you doing here?
SARAH
Looking for you. Are you sleeping in this?
GOOD JOE
(doesnt want to answer this) Sarah that was the weirdest thing . . . my dad . . .
it felt like I really just heard my dads voice . . . Have you been crying?
(This isnt answered, either.) Dont think I ever got it going again after that
day out. Dyou remember? With Emmo and Lewis and . . . (swallows) . . .
and the guys.
(There is a brief pause, a slightly golden one where they both remember that day.)
SARAH
You said when you came in the office you were trying to save Casey Street.
Tell me what you meant.
83
OUR HOUSE
GOOD JOE
(tries to be efficient) Oh. Right. Well its about these developers. Its a man
called Pressman. The companys called Pressmans. Theyre the ones built all
them things up there. And what I think it is is theyre planning to . . . (Under.)
MUSIC NO 18: IT MUST BE LOVE

(The sung and the (quieter) spoken texts run together where marked.)
SARAH
I NEVER THOUGHT I'D MISS YOU

HALF AS MUCH AS I DO.
AND I NEVER THOUGHT I'D FEEL THIS WAY
THE WAY I FEEL ABOUT YOU.
AS SOON AS I WAKE UP
EVERY NIGHT, EVERY DAY.
I KNOW THAT IT'S YOU I NEED TO TAKE THE BLUES AWAY
IT MUST BE LOVE, LOVE, LOVE.
NOTHING MORE, NOTHING LESS, LOVE IS THE BEST.
GOOD JOE
(simultaneous with the above) . . . create something like villas, like luxury
villas, which means that they just (Gestures.) completely nix the whole of
Casey Street. Now they've obviously offered money to mum to move her
out of number twenty-five. And I don't know if she's signed anything or
what the whole legal situation is, I don't know anything about law and I
haven't got any money to pay for people who do, and and and
Pressmans are gonna have the bloody you know, the Rolls Royce of
lawyers . . .
(Beat. They look at each other.)
SARAH
Okay. Well I did some research . . . (Under.)
GOOD JOE
HOW CAN IT BE THAT WE CAN

SAY SO MUCH WITHOUT WORDS?
BLESS YOU AND BLESS ME
BLESS THE BEES AND THE BIRDS.
SARAH
(simultaneous with the above) . . . looked up the deeds. And I mean this
wasnt straightforward getting this, I tell you. This was calling in favours of
friends of friends, God but there was something turned up. I found this . . .
84
OUR HOUSE
I mean I dont know what it is but and I think this might be the document
which would prove . . . which would prove . . . would actually say . . .
(She loses words as she looks up at GOOD JOE.)
SARAH
+ GOOD JOE
IVE GOT TO BE NEAR YOU

EVERY NIGHT, EVERY DAY
I COULDNT BE HAPPY
ANY OTHER WAY.
(Underscore.)
SARAH
Your Dad took them, Joe. Theyve got a record. About a month after he last
came out of prison, he came in and took the deeds. Why, I dont know, if
he didnt try and sell it, but . . . (She looks down at a file.) A while after, he
returned this. (Beat.) I am so dead if anyone finds I took it. I asked so many
friends of friends . . . (She hands over an envelope.) Pressmans boys
wouldntve noticed. Someone looking for deeds would never notice
something just marked For Joe.
(GOOD JOE opens it. Pulls out a small piece of card, and some papers.)
SARAH
(frowns, leans in) That your mum and dad?
GOOD JOE
The Simplest Dance in the Universe. Winning couple. Margate Pier.
SARAH
He took that from the house?

(Theres a look between them.)
SARAH
So is that what I think? Is that the deeds?
GOOD JOE
(opens a piece of paper, looks at her) Youre incredible, Sarah.

(He wants to hold her. But realises he cant. So he shakes her hand. They shake
hands. And keep shaking . . . )
85
OUR HOUSE
SARAH + JOE
IVE GOT TO BE NEAR YOU

EVRY NIGHT, EVRY DAY
I KNOW THAT ITS YOU I NEED
TO CHASE THE BLUES AWAY.
IT MUST BE LOVE LOVE LOVE
IT MUST BE LOVE LOVE LOVE.
IT MUST BE LOVE LOVE LOVE
IT MUST BE LOVE LOVE LOVE.
(Music ends.)
GOOD JOE
I can go home.
(The two lovers look at each other.)
SARAH
You got your dream. Youre proving my mates wrong, Mister Casey.
GOOD JOE
And youre a lawyer, so you got yours, Mrs . . . ? Whats that make you
now?
SARAH
(pause) I didnt get married, Joe. Sometimes, no matter how much you love
someone, you cant say yes.
GOOD JOE
Right. I didnt know. Thats very sad.
MUSIC NO 18a: TAG After Scene

(SARAH nods, turns and goes. GOOD JOE stays nodding sombrely until shes
gone.)
GOOD JOE
(Contd)
Could this day get any (Jumps up.) better?!
MUSIC NO 19: THE SUN AND THE RAIN Reprise (Stallholders)
SCENE CAMDEN MARKET

STALLHOLDERS plough in. The sign CAMDEN MARKET appears. They set up stalls during:
86
OUR HOUSE
GOOD JOE
Im coming home, mum!

ITS RAINING AGAIN
A CRACK IN THE CLOUDS REVEALS BLUE SKIES
IVE BEEN FEELING SO LOW
BUT NOW EVERYTHING IS ON MY SIDE
WALK WITH ME, FILL MY HEART AGAIN.
STALLHOLDER 1
(MALE)
WHO WILL BUY MY INDIAN JOSS STICKS?
INCENSE BURNERS DIRECT FROM NEPAL?
STALLHOLDER 2
(MALE)
SUCH FINE OFFENSIVE T-SHIRTS.
RUDE WORDS. OBSCENE DESIGNS.
STALLHOLDER 3
(FEMALE)
LOOK AT MY WIDE RANGE OF EXOTIC BATH SOAPS
MADE FROM SOME THINGS YOU WOULD NORMALLY EAT.
STALLHOLDER 4
(MALE)
RI-I-IPE CANNABIS, RI-I-IPE.
(Repeat all, simultaneously, once.)
GOOD JOE +
MARKETEERS
I FEEL THE RAIN FALLING ON MY FACE . . .

IN SO MUCH RAIN I COULD ALMOST DROWN . . .
(Underscore DANCE OF CAMDEN MARKET)
(Theres a thunderclap. The STALLHOLDERS all look up, feel for rain, turn
their stalls over and immediately convert to selling Union Jack umbrellas . . . )
87
OUR HOUSE
GOOD JOE +
MARKETEERS
(whispered) ITS RAINING AGAIN, ITS RAINING AGAIN

ITS RAINING AGAIN, ITS RAINING AGAIN
ITS RAINING AGAIN, ITS RAINING AGAIN
ITS WHOA-A-A . . .
(sung) I FEEL THE RAIN FALLING ON MY FACE
(GOOD JOE goes behind the open umbrellas . . . which then shut to reveal BAD
JOE. Its magical. The doors snap to black.)
BAD JOE
ITS RAINING AGAIN

IM HEARING IT PITTER PATTER DOWN
ITS WET IN THE STREET
REFLECTING THE LIGHTS AND SPLASHING FEET.
NOWHERE TO GO, AND NOTHING I HAVE TO DO.
(checks his watch) Cmon Reecey. Where ARE y?
(The umbrellas part to reveal EMMO and LEWIS in their grey chauffeur gear.)
BAD JOE
Emmo? Lewis? What the hell are you two doing here? What happened to
Mums birthday trip in the limo?
EMMO
She wouldnt come.
BAD JOE
(horrified) Shes still in the house?
LEWIS
Funny enough not everyones idea of a birthday present is limousine, Joe.

Some people would rather just stay and wait and hope that their son might
come home to visit.
BAD JOE
(races off) No. No, no, no! Shes still in the house! REECEY!
MARKETEERS

88
OUR HOUSE
(The doors are now spinning continuously as we see both GOOD and BAD JOES
rushing towards the house through the umbrellas of the market, whose singing
accumulates . . . )
MARKETEERS

BAD JOE
Reecey!
MARKETEERS

GOOD JOE
Im coming home, Mum!
MARKETEERS

BAD JOE
Mum!
MARKETEERS

GOOD JOE
Mum!
MARKETEERS
THE SUN SHINES EAST, THE SUN SHINES WEST

BUT I KNOW WHERE THE SUN SHINES BEST
CASEY STREET IN THE AFTERNOON
ONCE AGAIN ITS OVER TOO SOON.
( . . . to suddenly clear, as the stage clears to reveal . . . )
MARKETEERS
AHHH, AHHH, AHHH
SCENE CASEY STREET

. . . where the house is on fire.
(GOOD JOE stares at it. BAD JOE stares at it. Vocal Underscore.)
GOOD
+ BAD JOE
Mum!
89
OUR HOUSE
(They both start to rush for the door, but both are restrained by separate groups
of onlookers.)
GOOD JOES
ONLOOKERS
JOE! JOE!
(GOOD JOES ONLOOKERS part to reveal KATH.)
BAD JOE
Shes in the house! My mums in the house!

(BAD JOES ONLOOKERS pull him away from entering the house.)
GOOD JOE
(gently) Mum?
(BAD JOE collapses to his knees surrounded by his ONLOOKERS. GOOD JOE is
left alone with KATH by their ONLOOKERS. They look at each other as if
afraid each is a ghost.)
GOOD JOE
(Contd)
You couldve been in there.
MUM
Shhh.
GOOD JOE
You couldve been in the house. You couldve been in . . .
KATH
(calms him, finger on his lips) Your girl came and told me where you were
sleeping, Joe. Your girl, my God, who loves you, golden boy.
GOOD JOE
Pressman will have done this, Mum. I came back to save it and . . .
KATH
(shushing him like a baby) You came back to me, Joe Casey. Not the house.
(She holds him.) You came back to me.
(KATH hugs him on one side of the stage as BAD JOE is helped away in the
middle of his ONLOOKERS.)
SCENE CHURCH
Doors spin to black. All is blackness and death. Were in BAD JOEs story. Vocal Underscore
continues (+ organ). A very simple wooden coffin. A very simple cross. A very simple light.
The PRIEST, EMMO, LEWIS, BILLIE, ANGIE and SARAH. Theyre in black. BAD JOE comes
in. Music ends.)
90
OUR HOUSE
LEWIS
Police reckon it was someone breaking in. Dropped a fire bomb. Good that,
innit? (Pause.) Shouldve told us you had something planned, Joe. Wedve
tried harder to get her in the limo . . .
EMMO
Whoa . . .
(LEWIS flies at him and has to be restrained by EMMO.)
EMMO
(Contd)
Whoa, whoa whoa. Come on big man.

(Its now clear BAD JOE is crying.)
LEWIS
Dont you dare. Dont you dare cry now.
BAD JOE
(s.v., like a baby) Its my Mum.
LEWIS
She is now. On Friday she was the woman you wanted out of Casey Street.
EMMO
Come on.
(The lads leave.)
BILLIE
Eh Joe. Good job Sarah went into law.
ANGIE
I reckon yr gonna need it.

(BILLIE and ANGIE go. Pause. SARAH looks at JOE for some kind of
confirmation he had nothing to do with this.)
SARAH
Wasnt, was it Joe? You didnt have anything to do with this?

(Pause.)
BAD JOE
Sarah. We might have to reinforce the truth a bit.

(SARAH looks at him. Her hands slowly rise to cup her mouth at the horror of
whats coming . . . )
91
OUR HOUSE
SARAH
(s.s.s.v.) Ohhhhmygod.
BAD JOE
No, no, no, just to be safe. For the future. For the both of us. Just to be safe,
yeah?
SARAH
Yr still running arent you, Joe? The crimes just got bigger.
BAD JOE
Its not dont say crime. Sarah, if anyone asks if I wanted mum out of
Casey Street I need to know yd say the right thing.
(SARAH looks at him.)
SARAH
No matter how much you love someone, Joe, theres times in life you cant
say yes.
MUSIC NO 19a: SIMPLE EQUATION (Reprise)

DAD
SUDDENLY
WRONG TURNS BACK TO RIGHT
BLACK TURNS SLOWLY BACK TO WHITE
SKIES ALL SUDDENLY COME CLEAR
WE SEE HOW WE GOT TO HERE
(We hear a sentence delivered by a judge.)
JUDGE
Daniel Reece you have named Joseph Casey as an accomplice. You will both
be remanded pending further investigation into the charges of arson and
manslaughter brought against you by the crown . . .
(The prison gates appear.)
BAD JOE
I NEED A MOMENT TO REFLECT

ON THE FRIENDSHIPS I HAVE WRECKED.
(BAD JOE goes to prison.)
SCENE PRIMROSE HILL

The doors spin to white. All is brightness and light. Were in GOOD JOEs story.
92
OUR HOUSE
MUSIC NO 20: PRIMROSE HILL / OUR HOUSE (Reprise)

(Underscore. Everyone piles on for a party on Primrose Hill. EMMO and LEWIS
with BILLIE and ANGIE and balloons and a camera.)
EMMO
Theyre comin! (Points.) Theyre coming. Quick.
LEWIS
Did you get a wedding present?
EMMO
Yeah. I got em a Surprise Harmony condom.
LEWIS
What?
EMMO
Well its nice for a young couple, yknow? I mean they dont work, but they
do mean yr kids grow up very musical.
(KATH enters. General cheer.)
KATH
Well. Theres one thing about a registry office. Its a bloomin sight shorter
than the Catholic service.
(HONKK-K . . . all turn to see . . . GOOD JOE pushes SARAH on shes
standing up in the Morris minor which has broken down again, but is sparkling,
done up, bows on, flashing chaser lights round it and wearing a bow tie. The
fans are on so her wedding veil is billowing out behind her. They all cheer.)
GOOD JOE
Sarah, this is now our mum. (Shows her round.) Our Emmo. Our Lewis.
(BILLIE and ANGIE step forward for theirs . . . )
GOOD JOE
(Contd)
And your mates.
ANGIE
Oi.
EMMO
(top off) Lets hit Primrose Hill an party.
ANGIE
God, Emmo. Youve got a decent body, yknow that?
93
OUR HOUSE
LEWIS
Yeah. I thought I might take my top off an all . . .
BILLIE
+ ANGIE
No.
LEWIS
Fair point.
SARAH
Photograph!
(They all go to arrange themselves as . . .)
GOOD JOE
Photograph for you, too. (He gives KATH the photo of Margate.) The
Simplest Dance in the Universe.
(KATH immediately remembers the moment, right from the start of the story.)
KATH
(hand to mouth) Oh baby.
GOOD JOE
I think he came back, Mum. I think he was gonna sell the house, broke in to
take stuff but he found that. And that memorys what made him . . .
(Pause Kath looks at the envelope, in tears.)
KATH
For Joe.
DAD
I didnt want I didnt mean . . .
GOOD JOE
It wasnt simple for him, Mum. I think I understand now. He couldve done
the wrong thing for the right reasons. An made mistakes. An hurt you . . .
EMMO
Its taking!
GOOD JOE
We can rebuild it, Mum. Pressman, all his plans Reecey named him as an
accomplice. Hes gone down for years.
KATH
(takes JOEs face in her hands) You go to your girl, Joe Casey. And Casey
Street will be wherever you two build it.
EVERYONE
Five, four, three . . .
94
OUR HOUSE
(KATH goes back to the photo . . . )

DAD + JOE
NOW WE DRAW THE FINAL CURTAIN,

BUT WITHOUT YOU IN MY LIFE . . .
DAD
(calls) Joe?
(The membrane between them, at parting, is so thin, that GOOD JOE hears.)
DAD
(Contd)
Gonna miss you, mate. But I think I have to go now.

(Beat.)
GOOD JOE
I know.
SARAH
Oi! Did we get married or what?

(GOOD JOE turns and runs back, missing his fathers touch.)
EVERYONE
Two, one . . .
EMMO
Smile!
EVERYONE
(shout) YEAH!
(Flash.)
EVERYONE
(Contd)
OUR HOUSE
OUR HOUSE
OUR HOUSE
OUR HOUSE
OUR HOUSE
95
OUR HOUSE
OUR HOUSE
OUR HOUSE
OUR HOUSE
OUR HOUSE
OUR HOUSE
(As the gang sing, time winds back to the birthday party of JOE at the start.
Banners balloons, signs saying HAPPY SIXTEENTH JOE . . . )
EVERYONE
(Contd)

(Hung pause . . . )
SARAH
Sixteen, Joe! Where dyou go when you can go anywhere?

(Music sting, a moment of magic . . . )
GOOD JOE
(beams) Lets go dancing.
COMPANY
IN THE MIDDLE OF OUR STREET!

(JOE and SARAH kiss!)
(Curtain.)
96
OUR HOUSE
MUSIC NO 21: BOWS

COMPANY
OUR HOUSE
OUR HOUSE
OUR HOUSE
OUR HOUSE
WELCOME TO THE HOUSE OF FUN / OUR HOUSE
NOW WEVE COME OF AGE / IN THE MIDDLE OF OUR
WELCOME TO THE LIONS DEN / OUR HOUSE
MUSIC NO 22: ENCORE / PLAY OUT

COMPANY
OH WHAT FUN WE HAD

TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE TO THE . . .
OH WHAT FUN WE HAD
TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE TO THE . . .
BAGGY TROUSERS. BAGGY TROUSERS.
BAGGY TROUSERS. NA NA NA NA . . .
OI!
97
(x3)
By TIM F IRTH
VOCAL BOOK
Josef Weinberger Limited

London W1T 3JJ
Tel: +44 (0)20-7580 2827 Fax: +44 (0)20-7436 9616
general.info@jwmail.co.uk www.josef-weinberger.com
OUR HOUSE
Book Copyright 2009 by Tim Firth
Edition Copyright 2009 by Josef Weinberger Limited, London
All Rights Reserved
For individual song copyright details, see appendix.
Applications to perform this musical must be made,

BEFORE REHEARSALS COMMENCE, to:
JOSEF WEINBERGER LIMITED
London W1T 3JJ
United Kingdom
Tel: +44 (0)20 7580 2827
Fax: +44 (0)20 7436 9616
www.josef-weinberger.com
September 2009
MUSICAL NUMBERS
ACT ONE
1.
Opening (Instrumental) .....................................................................1
1a.
Los Palmas Seven (Underscore) (Instrumental)...................................1
2.
Our House (Priest, Joe, Emmo, Lewis, Casey St. Residents) .................1
2a.
Our House Playoff (Instrumental)......................................................5
2b.
Balcony Underscore (Instrumental) ....................................................5
3.
Simple Equation (Dad) .....................................................................5
4.
My Girl (Emmo, Bad Joe, Lewis) .......................................................7
4a.
4b.
Magistrates Court (All I Wanted / My Girl) (Kath, Dad, Lads).......11
5.
Baggy Trousers (Reecey, Schoolkids, Mr Jesmond, Bad Joe).................12
5a.
6.
Embarrassment
(Careers Officer, Reecey, Billie, Angie, Emmo, Neighbours, Lewis,
Aunt, Uncle, Security Guards, Kath, Grandad, Good Joe) ..................18
6a.
Embarrassment Playoff (Instrumental) ............................................20
6b.
Baggy Trousers Underscore (Instrumental) ......................................20
7.
Embarrassment Reprise (Encouragement Version)

(Bad Joe, Heather, Sales Reps, London Alarms Boss,) ..........................21
7a.
Baggy Trousers / Our House Underscore (Instrumental)..................22
8.
Driving In My Car (Good Joe, Lewis, Emmo, Billie, Angie, Sarah) ....23
8a-I.
My Girl Reprise (Ballad Version) (Sarah, Dad).............................25
8a-II.
Driving In My Car Reprise (Dad, Bad Joe, Salesman)....................25
8b.
After Driving In My Car (Instrumental)...........................................25
8c.
Simple Equation Reprise (Dad, Chorus)........................................26
9.
The Return Of The Los Palmas Seven (Instrumental) ......................27
10.
Shut Up (Reecey, Coppers, Good Joe ) ................................................28
11.
Tormorrows Just Another Day / The Sun and the Rain

(Prisoners, Good Joe, Girls Chorus, Bad Joe, Sarah) ............................30
ACT TWO
12.
Night Boat To Cairo (Dad) ............................................................36
12a.
Night Boat (Vegas Underscore) (Instrumental) ................................37
13.
Wings Of A Dove (Carib Combo, Billie, Angie, All) ........................38
14.
One Better Day (Dad, Good Joe, Chorus, Kath) ...............................44
14a.
Our House Reprise (Good Joe, Dad) ............................................47
15.
Rise And Fall (Good Joe, Chorus) .....................................................48
16.
House Of Fun / Rise And Fall / My Girl

(Bad Joe, Julie, Good Joe, Mr. Pressman, Chorus) ..............................50
16a.
Scene Change (Underscore) (Instrumental) .....................................52
17.
N.W.5 (Sarah, Dad, Chorus) ...........................................................53
17a.
Embarrassment Reprise (Law Firm)

(Clerk, Barrister, Good Joe, Harper, Smith, Massey,
Harrassed Small-Time Lawyer.) .......................................................57
17b.
Underscore (My Girl / NW5 / Simple Equation)

(Sarah, Dad, Chorus) .......................................................................59
18.
It Must Be Love (Sarah, Good Joe) ..................................................61
19.
The Sun And The Rain Reprise (Stallholders)

(Good Joe, Bad Joe, Stallholders, Chorus) ..........................................64
19a.
Simple Equation (Reprise) (Dad, Bad Joe) ......................................71
20.
Primrose Hill / Our House (Reprise) (Dad, Good Joe, Company) ....72
21.
Bows (Company) .............................................................................74
22.
Encore / Play Off (Company) ..........................................................76
Vocal Book
OUR HOUSE
1. Opening TACET
1a. Los Palmas Seven TACET
2. Our House
Q - Joe: There's a wrong way and a right way.
It's a pretty simple equation. (Doorbell.)
q = 123
Joe
Fa - ther wears
his Sun - day
kids are play - ing

15
up
best
12
she needs
Priest
Mo - ther's tired
down - stairs.
Sis - ter's sigh - ing
in
her
Bro - ther's got
date
to
keep
he
21
in
the mid - dle of
street.
Joe
Our house it
has a
24
our
us - ual - ly
quite
Our
loud.
Copyright 2009 by Josef Weinberger Ltd., London

Emmo + Lewis
house
the mid - dle
of
our
al - ways some - thing hap - pen - ing
Emmo + Lewis
there's
the
in
Our
house
crowd
can't hang a - round.
18
CHORUS
B.V.
Oh
rest,
sleep.
Joe
Our mum she's
so
house

proud.
and it's
2. Our House
27

No - thing e
ver slows
her down and a
mess is
not
in
the mid - dle of
33
Gentle (Dialogue)
our
street.
Everyone
in
47
keep.
50
53
Our
house
de
of
de
Girls
mf
Ay

Na na na na
na
na
Our
naaa
our
yah
de
yah
da
da
da
our
cas - tle
and our
da
de
de
da
de
yah
Ay
Na na na na
street. Our house
de
our
is
De
our
in the mid - dle of
house
the mid - dle of
of
the mid - dle of
house
the mid - dle
in
mf

da
mf
house
in
our
in
Casey Street Inhabitants
Boys
Our house
da
the mid - dle
Our
Our
is our cast - tle and our keep. Our house
44
Our house
37
al - lowed.
30
Everyone
CHORUS
na
na
naaa
da

yah
yah
2. Our House

57
yah
Ay
Na na na na
na
na
yah
yah
yah
Ay
yah
yah
naaa
Na na na na
na
na
naaa
Everyone
61
64
ff
Na na na na na na naa Na na na na na na naa

na na naa
67

Na
83 CHORUS
Na na na na na na naa Na na na na na na naa
Na na na na na Na na na na na na
Na
Everyone
Our
na
na
naa
in
of
our
mid - dle
of
our
house
the
Our
Q to cut: "Fem-safe Femidom"

VAMP - Cut on cue (4th X?)
Cut on Joe: " . . . flavour? . . . Right"

VAMP - Cut on cue
house
the mid - dle
in
na
Sarah: "GIRLS!"
86
Na na
Q to go on: Billie:
". . . Asda bag but it's alright."
VAMP TILL READY
Na na na na na Na na na na na na Na na
na
73
street.
Our
house

is
our
cas - tle
and our
2. Our House
89
Wel - come to
keep.
Our
house
in
92
the mid - dle
of
95
Wel - come to
the house
Our
our
temp - ta - tion's on
Our
the
of
fun
now I've come
of
age.
his
way.
Wel - come to
our
li - on's
den
Our
house
Our
house
of
our
the mid - dle
our
street.
of
fun
the mid - dle of
the mid - dle of
our
li - on's
den
Our
house
now I'm come
of
age

in
our
the

in
of

In
the house
the house
Wel - come to
in
of
house
the mid - dle
den.
house
li - on's
the mid - dle of
Wel - come to
Our
our

in
of
101

street.
in
98
the
house
mid - dle
Wel - come to
in
the
fun.
the mid - dle of
Segue PLAY OFF
street.
street.
our
2a. Our House Playoff TACET

2b. Balcony Underscore TACET
3. Simple Equation
Q - V.O.: "This is the police."
q = 160
Girls B.V.
Ooh
13
Ooh
17
Aah
Aah
Ooh
21
Aah
Slightly slower q = 152
Joe's Dad
It's
29

sim - ple
e - qua - tion
of
wrong ver - sus right.
Pro - blem as
ea - sy
the
as
3. Simple Equation
32

black ver - sus white
the
sim - ple
35

Fac - ing
the
38
there

45
no
it
days
that
B.V.
Days
49
or
that
sha - dows
Sha - dows
by
al

sep - a
which
we
we
of
night ver - sus
ve - ry
rate

rate
day
'Cos with - out
If
ways so
sep - a
which
tion
run - ning a - way
high.

by
ic
is
Is
41
mus
e - qua
no - thing
fell
there'd
be
no
re - cog
nise
nise
sky.
the night.
The
re - cog
low
It's the
the night.
clear?

the
light.
the
light.
4. My Girl
Q - Sarah: "Maybe I'm not such a good judge of character."
Faster
Slowly
did -n't
girl's mad at
She's love - ly
17
in
21
and watch
T.
on
25
for
an
hour.
my own,
tried and tried but I
ev - ery
like
to
then.
Been on the
be heard.
said
stay
now and
We hard - ly
could not
hard to
Why can't she see?
me
But
V.
I found it
me.
My girl's mad at
phone
to
Bad Joe
of her.
me
She thought I'd had e - nough
13
My
see the film to - night.
want to
say.
28
Emmo
q = 120
te - le -
word.
Why
can't
ex -
4. My Girl
8
31

Emmo
Why can't she see?
Why
35

do I
She does - n't
Emmo
weak.
me.
But I like to stay
own
Lewis
Underscore
Bad Joe

was
I don't care
out.
Emmo
Bad Joe
all the wrong
thought we'd
a -
Now when I
Emmo
try
And now she says

Lads
3
La
la
to speak
Bad Joe
She says I'm un - a - ware
light.
I thought we'd talked it
She sort of says.
on my
to
We talked and talked un - til it
57
She takes it
greed.
54
My girl
Bad Joe
(way.)
50
un - der - stand.
(Lewis bursts in . . . )
pain?
And watch T
47
feel this
in
She's love - ly
plain?
38
la
la
la
I'm
4. My Girl
69
na
74
na na na
Muted Tpt solo
na
na
85
90
la la la
la
la
la
na na
na

na
na
na na
Slow
Underscore
rall.
na
She does - n't
na
Slow

na
un - der - stand
Bad Joe
Why do
feel this pain?
she does - n't re - al - ise.
Tpt
rall.
Dad

She takes it
all... the wrong...
Dead Segue
10
4a. Simple Equation - Reprise

q = 160
Joe's Dad
...way
B.V.
Ooh
Aah
q = 152
Ooh
Joe's Dad
It's the

night ver - sus
17
day
of
20
own - ing
that
where

that
one
love,
fell.
if
Cos' with - out
With - out
26
or
Cam - den Town night
path that seemed right

23
up clean - ly,
what would have hap - pen'd
no

stars,
Is
no
it
so
love
sim - ple
e - qua - tion
run - ning
a - way.
So
gol - den boy Joe
there
is
no
Will
rall.

to
took the
tell.
of
sky
hard
Aah
14
this
high.
rise
4b. Magistrates Court
11
(All I Wanted/My Girl)

Q - Solicitor: "...custodial sentences..."
Dad: "Custodial?"
Joe: " ...you mean like prison?"
(Guitar)
q = 140
33
Slower
was a
want - ed
was a
Kath
All
want - ed
Kath
All
(Tpt solo)
was
Dad
when both
Dad rall.
word,
She takes
it
leave
him lone
Why do
She does - n't
all...
the
wrong
(way...)
this
path
ly
more,
for?
and
the
right
in
feel
un - der - stand
Cutoff Q - Reecey:
"Well, well, well."
the wrong
is
mo - ment
what
a chance to ask
look
Bad Joe
Dad
2nd X: Rall
a - noth - er
word,
want - ed
was a
Dad
word,
(Tpt)
word,
night.
41
44
want - ed
Kath
All
29
All
Kath
25
21
37
Q - Kath: "That doesn't mean

you're allowed to touch him."
2nd X: Rall
the
this pain?
rall.
she does - n't re - al - ise.
12
5. Baggy Trousers
Q - Reecey: "As of today . . . school's out!" (Bell rings).
Verse 1
q = 140
Reecey
Smash - ing
10

Chorus
we had
but
did it
19
Try - ing diff - erent ways
the wood - work tools.
real - ly
All
all
the rules.
the teach - ers
in
the pub,
All
to
but
the
Reecey
I learnt at school
was

at
make a diff - erence
a - gain.
Oh what fun we had
lunch - time bell will ring
turn out bad.

to
to think of when the
+ Schoolkids
how to bend not break the rule.
23
up
try - ing not
16
pass - ing round the read - y - rub,
Hav - ing fun and play - ing fools.
Oh what fun
Naugh - ty boys in nas - ty schools head - mas - ter's break - ing
13
the time
Verse 2
it seemed so bad.
days!
The head - mas - ter's had e - nough to - day

Mr Jesmond

All the kids have gone
a - way.
Gone to fight with next door's school.
Reecey

Ev - ery term that
is
the rule.
5. Baggy Trousers
26
Gang

Sits
a - lone and bends his cane,
same old back - sides

walk - ing home and squash - ing snails.

All
I learnt at school

at
38
the time
it seemed so
Dialogue (Mr Jesmond)
days
bad.
Oh what fun we had
but
Try - ing
EIGHT SEVEN

SIX
FIVE
Oh what fun
tall tales
turn out bad.
we had

make
diff - erence to

but
the
The bell goes . . .
FOUR THREE TWO ONE FREE - DOM
Verse 3
Schoolkids
57

in
real - ly
to
Lots of girls and lots
Play - ing foot - ball
did it
+ Schoolkids
diff - erent ways
the small ones tell
Schoolkids
46
All
was
35
a - gain.
Chorus
29
32
13
the park.
60

Pull - ing hair and eat - ing dirt
of boys.
Lots of smells and lots
of noise.
Kick - ing push - bikes af - ter dark.
Bag - gy trou - sers dir - ty shirts

Teach - er comes to break it
up.

Back of the head with a plas - tic cup.
5. Baggy Trousers
14
Chorus
63
choir-like

Oh what fun
we had
but
did it
66

91
real - ly
turn out bad.
Oh what fun we had

to
at
the time
Dance Break
Faster
diff - erence to
I learnt
Schoolkids
Oh what fun

we
had
was
it seemed so bad.
the
113
at school
but

make a
All
69
but
at
the
time
it seemed so
bad.
q = 140
119

Try - ing
diff - erent ways
122

his way.
to

make a
diff - erence to

Wel - come to
the
li - on's
1X: Reecey
2X: Reecey & Bad Joe
the
Wel - come to
den
the
li - on's

his way.
den
5. Baggy Trousers
125
Reecey & Bad Joe
Wel - come to
the
li - on's
den

Schoolkids 2
his way.
Wel - come to
his way.
131
li - on's
den
Bag - gy trou - sers.
School's
out.
li - on's
den
mf
School's
out.
li - on's
den
his way.

Na
his way.
his way.

Temp - ta - tion's on
the
the

the
Wel - come to
mf
Wel - come to

Schoolkids 3
his way.
mf gradual cresc.
128
15
his way.
na
na
na
na na

Wel - come to
the
li - on's
den
mf
mf
School's
out.
5. Baggy Trousers
16
134
his
way.
Wel - come to

Bag - gy
Bag - gy

Na
na
li - on's
na
na
na na
huh
141
huh
huh
huh
Try - ing
diff - erent ways
trou - sers.
huh
huh
to
School's
out.
Ba - ggy trou - sers

diff - erence to
ff
Na
huh
huh
huh
huh
huh
huh
Huh
na
huh
huh
huh

but
at
the time it seemed so bad.
the
rall.
144
Oh what fun we had
make
Huh
All
137
Huh
trou - sers.
the
na
na
Oi!
Segue
17
5a. Simple Equation (Reprise)

After applause - No cue
q = 152
rec - tion - al
in
sti - tutes
sim -ple e - qua - tion
make you cor - rect
you got - ta ex - pect
Sure - ly
you're goin'
cor -
to
em - erge
Cutoff Q Emmo: "This is nuts!"
14
It's a
11
Joe's Dad
in
world
whereyou're
on
the right path
right
mates
right girl?
18
6. Embarrassment
Q - Joe: "Take me or leave me."
q. = 152 Careers Officer
Re - ceived a
let - ter just
the
oth - er
know you no more.
With - in
10
us
13
no
Billie + Angie
16
Don't
do
that
Aunt
19
22
what
the first two lines
it
blunt - ly
come
round
here
will
the
Neighbours
think. We don't.
Our
Aunt
think,
she don't
But
I will
'cos
door.
What
on earth
did
you
wan - na
to come and see
know

they
know
Neighbours
they'll think...
score.
our
from
You're not
Aunt
their
seem they wan - na
Verse 1
Angie
you
more.
neigh - bours
giv - ing
for?
what
no
a - way
Verse 2 Emmo
keep
don't
read:
Billie
day
it down
more,
they'll
They laid
Reecey
she says
We
don't.
Aunt
That's
think
I don't.
6. Embarrassment
25
Middle
28
Lewis
Our
Lewis

race
when you're a dis - grace
to
Q to cut - Dog Man: "...Hoo hoo!"
37
43
The
49
ver -
you
Don't
want
you
home
from our
door
show
your
to
the
face,
Dialogue
race?
Security Guards
No
com - mit - ment
liv - ing en - dorse - ment.
have booked.
They
say
stay
to

Don't come round
Was an in - ten - tion that
you
Verse 3 Billie + Angie
can
looked.
How
Yes an em - bar - rass - ment
55
Q - Joe: "...and say that I'm a

reformed young offender."
in - ten - tion that
52
We are a dis - grace
you're an em - bar - rass - ment.
he says
hu - man
Uncle
Uncle
the
know
He says
46
un - cle he don't wan - na
hu - man
31
19
day
more.
way
Keep

here no
was
a - way
Verse 4 Kath
Our
dad
don't
6. Embarrassment
20
59
know
he says.
Too
late
to
re - con
wan - na
62
65
wan - na
68
71
head
know
I'm
feel -

on her
shoul
ing
twice
84
This
is
ser - i - ous
sid -
er
Emmo
Mum
ter.
mat
She Don't wan - na
as
old
she said.
der.
'Cos I'm
feel
Dialogue
ing
know
she says,
You're
Thought she had
her
as
old
twice
er
Q to cut - Clown: "...Uh-huh."
er
Everyone
gon - na
Emmo
No - one's
Slow
Emmo + Lewis
twice as old -
Q - Joe: "...and say that I'm a

reformed young offender."

feel - ing
74
I'm
Our
ya!
Lewis
Grandad
Middle Good Joe
an em - bar
rass - ment.
6a. Embarrassment Playoff TACET

6b. Baggy Trousers (Underscore) TACET
Segue
21
7. Embarrassment
(Reprise - Encouragement Version)
Q - Joe: "Ap ap ap!"
q. = 152 f
Slightly faster q. = 160
Bad Joe
Re - ceived a let - ter just the oth - er
Per - haps you might like
Ooh

15
wah
to
night,
so er...
give me
We've had se - cond thoughts a -
We had a mi - nor break - in Thurs - day
Sales Reps
11
day
bout that a - larm sys - tem.
Heather
a quote for....
Aah
London Alarms Boss

(spoken lines, no rhythm, after 'wah's)
Here he is. The rising
Ooh
star,
Joe
Casey.
As
wah.
Ooh
District Manager here at
wah.
18
London Alarms, let me congratulate you
Ooh
on
your recent
wah.
sales
figures.
Fourteen
Ooh
wah.
is
7. Embarrassment (Reprise - Encouragement Version)
22
Sales Reps
22
new
company
record.
25
He's
28
he
has
Tpt / Sax Q
59
Slower
cour
age - ment
of
The
pro - mise
a long term re - la
Sales Reps

an
that
tion -ship.
accel.
rall.
Aah
en - cour
He's
en
Aah
wah
the start
wah
Ooh
63
Instrumental - swing feel

Faster q = 170
53
an
This is
Ooh
37
liv - ing en - dorse - ment.
shown
31
age -ment.
Ooh
(slide)
wah.
7a. Baggy Trousers / Our House (Underscore) TACET
23
8. Driving in My Car
Q - Billie + Angie: "Goodbye."
q =122
Verse 1
Good Joe
I've been dri - ving in
It says Mor - ris
in
G.
P.
Guv - e - nor calls me
slob
23
but
don't
Bridge
drive in
real - ly
it
for
my
job the
Give
care.
Sax solo
Joe
bit
old
but
it's mine,
mend
it
in
Just last week
I changed the
oil
the
rock - er valves and the coil.
my spare time.
Emmo + Lewis
31
Middle
It's
34
Good Joe
be - fore.
fac - tory by the Tyne.
me some gas and the o - pen air.
28
O. owned it
bloke from Bra - zil.
on the door, the
Jag - u - ar.
20
from a
fif - ty - nine
Lewis
17
it's not quite a
in Prim- rose Hill,
13
was made in
my car
I bought it
It
Just last week he changed the oil.
Good Joe, Emmo + Lewis
Last week
it
went round the clock
al - so
had
lit - tle knock
8. Driving in My Car
24
39
Good Joe
Emmo + Lewis
dent - ed some - bo - dy's fen - der
He learnt not
62
Verse 2
ha
69
in
my
It
don't look much but I've been far.
e - ven been to Sel - sey Bill.
had her
Billie + Angie
He likes dri - ving

96
Good Joe + Sarah
in
his
car.
Don't look much but I've been far.
Good Joe
God
love this
car!
up
to
fif - ty eight.
Joe
I've
ha.
to Mus - well Hill.
I drove a - long the A for - ty - five
93
car
I drive up
73
Good Joe
I've been dri - ving
ha
to park on a ben - der
(Tpt / Sax)
66
77
42
Billie
like dri - ving in
Billie + Angie

Don't look much.
my car.
"Full stop."
25
8a - I. My Girl - Reprise (Ballad Version)
Sarah
Why can't I
10
he does - n't
un - der - stand
Ev - ery -thing I
ex - plain?

he does - n't
Dad + Sarah

rall.
re - al - ise.
He takes it
all the wrong
say
8a - II. Driving In My Car - reprise

Swing - feel q = 180
Dad
way
He's been
Salesman: "Here we are sir, I think

you'll like this one, it's a twin carb
four litre petrol-engined...
Fin - ish,
in - deed
trim, and
Underscore
dri - ving
(Tpt)
It
says
car.
Joe
in his
Salesman
cor - ri - dor.
rall.
Jag - u - ar.
Dad
11
15
is

It
on the
door.
Cli - mate controlled au - to - ma - tic - 'ly.
Dialogue
(Drums)
Q - Joe:
"...I give you." (Cym crash)
8b. After Driving In My Car (Cocktail Piano) TACET
26
8c. Simple Equation (Reprise)

Q - Sarah: "Depends if you're into that."
q = 160
B.V.
Ooh
11

15
Wrong
tur - ning
Dad
Ooh
As
you
but
in
the long run,
to
re
cog - nise
Dad
Dad: "Good turning bad?"
All
stand
where
wan - ted
once
was a
rain from the sun.
right
Joe: "It'd pay for a DJ"
The e - qua - tion starts sim - ple,
36
gets hard - er
19
q = 156
mf
Aah
Aah
Joe's Dad
28
stood
q = 152
Reecey: "Not your fault you can't get a job."
word
Reecey: "Not your fault your
dad doesn't own a distillery."
8c. Simple Equation (Reprise)
Dad
43

It's
47
that
Days
that
The
sha - dows
Sha - dows
50
Underscore
the
days
B.V. f
sep - a
by which
by which
sep - a
27
rate

rate
we
re - cog
we
re - cog
the night.
the night.
- nise
- nise
rall.

the light.
the light.
9. The Return of the Los Palmas Seven TACET
Dead segue
28
10. Shut Up
Q - Joe: "How brilliantly life would have turned out.
(Thunderclap.)
Copper: "Get the little scumbag!"
q. = 151
Reecey
Verse 1
I tell you
12
was - n't
17
Don't
lis - ten
to
his

Can't think of
25
Coppers
One
29
33
blame me,
side,
two
is - n't
close
ten
to

fair.
mine.
Chorus
'cos
Now
pass the blame
your
eyes
and
count
to
three.
bro
be
It
just
Reecey
The
Good Joe
it
it
three. Then I'll
Just
me some - time.
blame me.
lis
did - n't do
just
sto - ry, sure you'll find

don't
don't
20
and
there,
15
ken
was - n't me ei - ther
gone
win
and
dow
I'm just
you'll
T.
for
V.
his
mate
get.
set.
10. Shut Up 11. Tomorrow's Just Another Day / The Sun and the Rain
Reecey
37
He told me to stand
40
kids
43
you
Good Joe
46
less
I'm
61
the
day
close
your
three.
Then
three
the
got
least
blame
bro
and
count
be
gone
think
so
win
the
blame
dow
don't
three.
three
the day - light
to
and
ken
a wife and
and
I'll
two
pass
Underscore
One
eyes
The
I've
Reecey
The long - er
straight at
Now
you I'm
Verse 2
is long.
two
Chorus Reecey + Joe
gate.
as ho - nest as
the
They'll tell
do wrong.
One
57
Just
54
and watch
know.
49
here
29
me.
you'll
for
T.
V.
Watch for Cut-off on visual punch
get.
set.
30
11. Tomorrow's Just Another Day

Q - Dad: "No, no, no. Don't hit a copper. Never hit a copper!"
q = 136
X4
doo
doo
12
17
doo.
Prisoners
Try - ing
All
my
Chorus
Good Joe
hear
no
can't
them
say
To -mor -row's just
thought I'd
done my
best
get
I think that
Doo - by doo - by doo - by
no
rest.
Prisoners
Prisoners
up
say And it gets bet - ter ev - ery day.
life
27
hard
24
Doo - by doo, doo - by doo doo doo.
Down and down there is

21
Prisoners
gradual cresc.
run
out
of
I hear
them
luck.
Good Joe
I hear
them
an - oth - er day.
Good Joe
I've
Prisoners

say To -mor -row's just
an - oth - er day.
Good Joe
To - mor - row's just an - oth - er day. Walk - ing
now

O - ver
31

cov - ered
ground.
There is
35
39
On
42

say
the
friend
ships
need
have
To - mor - row's just
an - oth - er day.
Girls B.V.
Ooh
Dad

If black

52
is
white
an'
them
stretch
far a - way
them
bet - ter ev - ery
day.
To -mor -row's just an -oth - er
night
is
wah
day
And paths we
- flect
Good Joe + Prisoners
say And it gets
Ooh
re
I hear
to
wrecked.
I hear
- ment
say To -mor -row's just an -oth -er day.
if
Chorus
49
chance
mo
45
I hear them
gradual cresc.
move a - round.
31
How can
take
we
e - ver hope
to
call.
32

55
wah
Which will

thing
I've
been feel - ing
so
is
my
side,
on
74
I hear
in
the
It's rain - ing a - gain,
clouds
re
feel
the
no
bet
them
say
veals
blue
rain
ter
fall - ing
To -mor -row's just
ev - ery -
Walk
with
me
fill
on
my
face
could
an - oth - er day.
al
my
than stand - ing up
so much rain
now
place
rain.
In
But
down
Prisoners
the sun and the
crack
can say there is
fall - ing
gain.
fall?
low
Bad Joe +
Sarah
will
heart
77
and which
68
71
rise
61
64
Bad Joe
skies,
(Dad)
58
- most
in
the
drown.
I hear
them
80
say
82

say
And
it
gets
ev - ery
I hear
them
say
doo
doo
Doo - by doo
just
doo - by
doo
say And it gets bet - ter ev - ery day.
doo

91
doo
doo.
Bad Joe +
Sarah
I hear
Doo - by doo
feel
the
rain
Doo - by doo
an - oth - er day.
hear
them
To - mor - row's
To -mor -row's just
88
an - oth - er day.
day.
To - mor -row's
bet - ter
B
85

33
just an - oth - er
I hear
them
them
say
To -mor -row's just

doo - by
doo
doo
doo
on
my
face
doo
doo
fall - ing
doo - by
doo
To - mor - row's just
an - oth - er day.
an - oth - er day.
34

94
can say
there is
no
97
fall - ing
doo
doo
doo
feel
the
rain

bet - ter ev - ery day.
doo
doo.
so much rain I
(div.)
doo
hear
could al - most
doo - by
them
doo
drown.
on
doo - by
the
Doo - by doo
Doo - by doo - by doo - by doo
in
In
fall - ing
Doo - by
than stand - ing up
doo.
To - mor - row's just an - oth - er day.
place
ter
doo doo
down.
D
100

And it gets
bet
And it gets bet - ter ev - ery day.
my
face
doo
doo
an - oth - er day.
can say
there is
no
I hear
them
ter
bet
doo
103
say.
And
doo
doo
105
fall - ing
place
doo
it
than
gets
bet - ter
down.
111
say
114
hear them
say
And it gets bet - ter ev - ery
Omnes
I hear
day.
To - mor - row's
just
them
in
the
doo
hear
- by
them
most
drown.
doo
doo.
say. And it gets bet - ter ev - ery
an - oth - er day.
hear them
hear them
say
To -mor -row's just
an - oth - er
doo
To - mor -row's just
could al
up
doo
so much rain I
an - oth - er day.
day.
In
doo
Prisoners
ev - ery
108
stand - ing
Doo - by
doo.
35
an - oth - er
day.
End of Act One
36
ACT TWO
12. Night Boat to Cairo
Q - Foghorn
14
28
past
38
half
(Sax)
34
42
Instrumental
mon - soon

a - float,
de - so - late shore, last
banks of the ri - ver
boat a - long the ri - ver
It's
just
On - ly
just
Don't
seem
gone noon
comes the boat
smile.
Nile.
Here
Nile.
tooth - less
(Tpt)
Dad
oars - man grins a
(Brass)
on the
(Sax)
half

on - ly
one more

to this
to
no more,
care
12. Night Boat to Cairo
46
wind in
50
his hair
rea - ches
53
prods
56
the

as
he
rea - ches
his last half
dry
land,
but
the
sound
wet sand
with
an
oar
in
Floats
off
ri - ver
The
down the
mile.
does - n't
37
damp - en
his
smile.
his hand,
floats
off
oar snaps in
Nile.
his hand be - fore he
Just
down the
ri - ver
Segue
12a. Night Boat (Vegas Underscore) TACET
Nile.
38
13. Wings of a Dove
h = 117

laugh
with
15
19

for
of
28
woh
woh
woh
woh
for
of
you're
look - ing
the wings
for the wings
of
of
dove
woh
walk
ing
woh
down.
dove
for the wings of
All
and
when
and
woh
a - no - ther
the roof - tops
for your plea - sure
Don't think for a mo - ment
woh
dove
at
of
a dove
38
Look up
round.
33
dove
Take the hand
Billie + Angie
the wings
love
for the wings of

24
Take time
11
sing
Carib Combo
woh
woh
39
13. Wings of a Dove
43
47
for the wings
of

for
56
of
woh
Hall
62
ah.
68
le
uj
Hall
le
le
uj
ah.
uj
Carib Combo
+ Gang
ah.
le
uj
Q - Bad Joe: " Could this day get any better?"
72
woh
(div.)
dove
dove
the wings
Underscore
Look up
at
the
roof - tops
ah.
when
you're
walk
ing
40
13. Wings of a Dove
76
round.
80
84
think
for
of
look
room
at
the
Cheer to the e - cho
89
woh
Yeah
yeah
yeah
woh
94

Yeah
yeah
yeah
sound?
of
dove
woh
woh
yeah
for the wings
of
of
the
al -
yeah
yeah
for the wings
hear
not
yeah
you
for the wings
can
we're
down.
ing
where
top
mo - ment
Ooh
Don't
lowed
98
Ooh
dove
dove
woh
woh
woh
woh
41
13. Wings of a Dove
103
for the wings
of
112
Everyone
yeah
yeah
yeah
Yeah
yeah
yeah
126
yeah
yeah
132
yeah
woh
woh
dove
woh
149
woh
154
yeah
yeah

woh
a dove
Yeah
yeah
yeah
woh
a dove
for the wings
for the wings
of
dove
of
of
of
woh
dove
woh
dove
woh
for the wings of
for the wings
woh
woh
for the wings
woh
yeah
yeah
woh
for the wings of
yeah
yeah
Yeah
yeah
woh
yeah
yeah.
for the wings of

144
dove
yeah
119
138
dove
Yeah
yeah
woh
woh
42
13. Wings of a Dove
159
for the wings of

dove
woh
Yeah
woh
yeah
yeah
yeah

yeah
204
208

yeah
yeah
yeah
Look
round.
up
Ooh
Don't think for a mo - ment
when
aah
the roof - tops
Woh
woh
at
woh
Woh.
Trumpet
Woh.
Ooh
woh
Woh.
of
woh
Woh.
the wings
yeah.
for
188
woh
woh
Woh.
184
woh
177
a dove
164
170
you're
walk
ing
aah
of
look - ing
down.
43
13. Wings of a Dove

213

woh
217
woh
225
woh
Yeah
yeah
yeah
woh
Yeah
yeah
yeah
woh
for the wings
of
dove
yeah
of
for the wings
of
Half speed
yeah
for the wings
woh
woh
yeah
woh
221
dove
dove
For the wings
of
yeah
rit
dove
Dead segue
44
14. One Better Day
q = 122
Dad
Ar - ling - ton
9
an
13
21
25
29
time
34
a - cross
wa
up
out
stretched
hands
words mock.
on and
in
three - piece
the
like
Sur - round - ed
by his
he
sits
while cars
pass
past
he's
try - ing
to
- ber
a while
a - go

when
peo - ple
his
stopped
in
the road.
right through the lock,
mum
- bled
words, his
fum
side.
short white
Good Joe + Dad
Takes
his
one bet -ter
on
ther
fixed a - bode
re - mem
sits
and sees
ei
no
suit
ter
Dad
man
- bled
ad - dress
stares
but
House
old
He
17

to hear him
say:
day.
line
14. One Better Day
38
Good Joe
Walk - ing 'round you
42
60
one
64
in
time
with
bet - ter
hear
sun
- shine
She's
try - ing
to
- ber
while
re - mem
a - go
when
her
say
peo - ple
stopped
the
sun
shine
rhy - thm of your
shoes.
some

beat - ing down in
Joe
mp
The
Walk - ing 'round you
hear
the
Joe (upper) / Dad (lower)

Male chorus (harmony)
times
with
shoes.
Dad
rhy - thm of your
the
the
day.
hear
67
71
times
Underscore
to
some
beat - ing down
46
45
Boys B.V. mp
feel - ing
of
ar -
feel - ing
of
ar -

The
time
14. One Better Day
46

75
riv

riv
78
ing.
ing.
When y've
no - thing
left
When y've
Slow q = 90
[Scene change]

Aah
Slower
82
Walk - ing round you some - times
87

with
the

rhy
- thm of your
to
shoes.
lose.
lose.
rall.
the sun - shine
Dad: "I stood here after

I'd come out of prison."

Hear
to
left
Dad: "You are right in my

shoes now, golden boy."
Kath
no - thing
Girls B.V.
rall.
Dialogue
Beat - ing down in
time
Segue as one
47
14a. Our House (Reprise)

Slow, colla voce
Good Joe
re - mem - ber
way
back
then
when
ev - ery - thing
we
would
have
hap - py
such a
ve - ry good time, such
fine
was
true
and
when
time,
such
Dad
time.
re - mem ber how we'd play,
simp - ly waste the
day
a - way.
Cutoff Q Mr Pressman: "Kath? Kath?"
Then we'd
say
no - thing would come be - tween us
two
drea - mers
48
15. Rise and Fall

Q - Kath: "That's all the proof I'm gonna give ya, you bastard."
Slow
Colla voce
Good Joe
rall.
These are the streets
on
sum - mer nights
sit
out
I used to walk
and talk
that's the house where
q = 122
12
used
where
to
come and stand
in
Be - ing
29
here
a - gain
- ments
won't for - get
the
rise
and
fall.
homes
where we once
can
re - call
af - ter
mile
live
a - way
walked
an - ger
the mem - ories last.
for - got - ten
mo-
Tempo I
This is the town
and
trees and grass
Chorus - Double Tempo
they'd leave their
chil - dren play
20
We used to
34

Good Joe
to live
17
24
rall.
there's no - thing left
15. Rise and Fall
37
walk - ing
now
40
are
44
round
and
round
Double Tempo
here
a - gain
for - got - ten
48
mo
ments
All
sights
can
re - call
the
rise
and
Tempo I
fa - mil - iar
Be - ing
o - pen ground.
49
Aah
Good Joe
fall.

51
The
sun
shines
East,
Aah

54
All

the
sun shines west,
but
Ca - sey Street
in the
af - ter noon
know
where the
once
a - gain
sun
shines
it's
o - ver too soon.
best
Dead Segue
50
16. House of Fun / Rise and Fall / My Girl

[ D = explosion / thunderclap ]
q = 128
House of Fun
Bad Joe
Julie
Good morn - ing miss.
11
[D]
Yes I'm
cer - tain - ly,
Good Joe
36
Ve - gas.
[D]
half past nine.
My
Julie
Good Joe
What?
I'd like to speak to Mis - ter, is - it
Pressman
Bad Joe
Sit through there, don't touch the plants, and I've count - ed all those mag - a - zines.
(shouts)
Press - man? Right.
31
this way please.
Good morn - ing miss.
Julie
meet - ing Mis - ter Press - man. He said
Ca - sey. From Las - Ve - gas,
28
Julie
name's Joe
help you sir?
14
23
Bad Joe
Can
Bad Joe
(Knock) Pressman
That's right.
Come in.
(Shut)

Joe
My
pro - t - g
Ca - sey. Mis - ter Press - man. From Las
Pressman
Pressman
pro - per - ty
de - ve - lop - er.
Bad Joe
It's
38
in
Joe: "God, I hope I

can - I mean..."
Pressman
the blood.
51
My fam - 'ly were all build - ers. Well you're gon - na make
them real - ly proud.
Our House
41
Pressman
lit - tle
sto - ry
Coun - cil owned, we can boot them out.
48
This
old
re - luc - tant.
on.
One house seems to be
es - tate we're build - ing
rall...
"But, slight spanner in the works"
Joe.
44
lit - tle
Q - Joe:
"I'll do this by Friday the 1st."
Pause 2nd X only
Rise and Fall

B.V.
gradual cresc.

57
Ooh
Pressman
"And in
the East,
60
cross
Cam - den skies.
new
Aah
son
will
Ooh
Press - man
rise."
Ca - sey.
Pic - ture this Joe. There
On
Fri - day
the first.
a -
52
63
Slower
If
that witch
71
is
out of
Good Joe
Joe
[D]
(Knock)
Co - sey.
Pressman
Ca - sey.
Ca - sey. Come right
in please do.
what
you
want. That's
what
I'm
here
for.
Off
you
go.
Tell me
Good Joe
74
Ca - sey Street.
Pressman
q = 128
Q - Joe: "No."
Right.
Look
76
may
got
this wrong last
My Girl
78
have
night,
but
81
the film
84
87
91
not
as nice
as
had
e - nough
of
Ju - lie
in
to
it
hard
to
Why
But
tion

want to
take.
me.
re - cep
did - n't
her.
for
She finds
o - ver - heard some plans
me
She's love - ly
to - night.
She thinks I've
thought I
Pressman
Ca - sey Street, now.... My wife's mad at
see
who's nine - teen.
16a. Scene Change (Underscore) TACET
can't
she
see?
tra - gi - cally
53
17. NW5
Q - Sarah: "You earn support, Joe. You don't marry it."
In 2
Colla Voce
Sarah
I have
watch'd
you
humb - le
I have
heard
Wit - nessed the

16
that's
for
cert
with - out you
27
ev
r'y
have
thing
be - liev - ing
rise
up
will
love
For
just
that
smile
you
ver - y
en
all
my
bring
re -mains

life
would
you
One thing
strange dis - guise
lies

burd -
life
your own
in
be - come
my
you come a - live
in
in
ain
saw
ing
23
But
Though you
20
bless
up
come
up,
you
13
climb
beg - in - nings
From ver' y
9
give
you
For
just
that
17. NW5
54
31
song
36
41
to
sing
For
just
that
smile
q = 148
Dad
Though we
57
will
you bring
mad
face
the fin
you
- ness
al
love you
all
my
grow
stack
give
For
53
would
Sarah
Saw the
49
I watched
45
up
Onl - y
life
would
62
For just that
give
song
But
you
ev
to
sing
sing
thing
eyes
that's
for
with - out you
r'y
re -mains
thing
r'y
to
Sarah + Dad
to des - pise
One thing
ev
tar - pau - lin
cur - tain
you
song
up through
just that
in
my
For
just
that
smile
would
give
cert - ain,
life
you bring
you
ev
r'y thing
17. NW5
68
For just that
smile
you bring
For just that
song
to
sing
For
just
that
smile
that
smile
73

89
55
Sarah
give
you
ev
give
you
would

94
would
B.V.
Ev
r'y
For just that
song
100
thing

105
For
just
that
smile
For that
smile
smile
give
you
you bring
For
just
that
for that
For that
song
you bring
you bring
you
ev
r'y thing
sing
that
would
song
For
you sing
just
thing
For
thing
r'y
ev
r'y
song
For that
smile
that
for that
song
For
smile
17. NW5
56
110

114
for
For
For
that
that
that
song
song
for
song
that
For
song
you
For
sing
For
that
that
that
smile
smile
smile
57
17a. Embarrassment
(Reprise - Law Firm)
Q - Sarah: "I would give everything." (She goes.)
q. = 175
Clerk
Re - ceived
10
Young man wants
us - u - al
13
Keep
Mas - sey
in
fees.
Good Joe
a - way
from
Hamp - stead.
the
Harper
got
a - ny
To - tal bas - tards,
us
door.
Try
these
young - er,
big
time
of our
mon - ey.
You're not to come see
our
day.
he has - n't
Slight - ly small - er,
- ther
I gave him a note
Clerk
Hel - lo?
just
And he says
Barrister
20
let - ter
help with some mis - sing house deeds
Good - bye.
17
23
no
more.
Har - per, Smith
cheap - er.
de - ve - lo - pers. They
just
17a. Embarrassment (Reprise Law Firm)
58
27
30
Smith
think
40
ev
just buys them the right
'ry - thing.
I've
And the thing is
All 3 Lawyers
Good Joe
Keep
a - way
Harper
from
Cam - den High Street.
On
the o - ther
Massey
Used
no
us
Smith
door.
Try
to be the El - ec - tric
fight
them.
mo - ney to
see
con - nec - tions, and pow - er, they
no
more.
that le - gal aid place
Rhi - no

sex
shop.
Harrassed Small-time Lawyer
On
51
our
And
Well then you're not to come
43
37
mo - ney
think mo - ney's
33
Massey
the one side, mul - ti - mil - lion pound de - ve - lo - pers.
bloke on le - gal aid.
Slower
59
17b. Underscore
My Girl / NW5 / Simple Equation
Q - Good Joe: "The night I hit Callum I said I wished I'd never met you."
Joe: "No-one deserves to

be happy more than you."
My Girl
10
nal
cur -
will
35
tain?
One
love you
17
Sarah
Can
13
2nd X rall.
all
my
thing
1.
you
raise
fi -
that's
with - out
for
cert
2.
you
in
my
Underscore

sim - ple
e - qua - tion
Simple Equation
of wrong ver - sus right.
ain
The
life.
X4
Dad
It's the
(Hi-hat)
47
rall
life
q = 146
re - mains,
rall
ter - ror
of stand - ing
one
60
17b. Underscore (My Girl / NW5 / Simple Equation)
50
B.V.
mp
Ooh
North Lon - don night.

53
wa
now
watch - ing
56
wa
right
cho
sub cresc.
wa
Think - ing you'd
wa
go - ing
wa
wa
sub cresc.
wa
wrong.
White
things were
clear,
if
high?
If
things were
run
wa
wa
the right
way,
and
Aah
go - ing
Is
60
to
grey.
Show me
now,
which way's
ff
which way's high?
sen
Is this the
Earth?

Is
that
the

that
the
sky?
sky?
And if
clear.
could I
e - ven
make
hear?
him
knew
61
18. It Must Be Love

Q - Good Joe: "The company's called Pressman's." (Dialogue continues simultaneously with the music.)
q = 130
Sarah
14
18
I'd
fell
33
Sarah
love,

love
wake
is
the
say
you I

much
to
with - out
you

ev - 'ry
take
the blues
it
words.
a - way.
love.
It must be love,
more,
no - thing
ne - ver thought
need
No - thing
How can
a - bout

Good Joe
ev - 'ry night,
love,
much
up
best.
so
half as
love.
feel
It must be love,
37
41
I know that it's
the way I
Chorus
you
miss
And
way
day
I'd
this
do
As soon as
24
28
as
ne - ver thought
be
that

less,
we
can
18. It Must Be Love
62
47
51
Bless you and bless
bless
ev - 'ry
66
71
89
the
love,
love.
No- thing
hap - py
love,
love.
more,
no - thing
less,
near
be
Underscore
ev - 'ry night,
best.
I've got to be
93
you
It must be love,
Joe + Sarah
near
and the
is
be
I could - n't
It must be love,
love
oth - er way.
bees
day
61
an - y
the
Joe + Sarah
I've got to
me
birds.
57
know that
it's
you
ev - 'ry night,
you

need
ev - 'ry
to
chase
day
the
blues
a - way.
18. It Must Be Love
96
It must be love,
101
love,
108
113
love,
121
Love is
It must

be
love,
love.
love,
love.
love,
the
Slight rit.
It must
more,
best.
Q - Good Joe: "Right. I didn't know. That's very sad."

TACET
love,
love.
It must
sub mp
No - thing
be love,
It must be love,
18a. Tag after scene
love.
love.
It must
117
love.
love,
63
no - thing

be love,

be
less.
love,
64
19. The Sun and Rain

Reprise (Stallholders)
Q - Good Joe: "Could this day get any better?"
q. = 136
clouds
11
15
re
veals
blue
skies,
I've
But now
walk
with
me
fill
on
my
face
21
my
side
gain.
feel
the
can say
there is
in
the
fall - ing
no
drown.
In
Who
down
cense
burn
ers
rect
from
will buy
di
Ne
fall - ing
place.
In
so much rain I
In - di - an
rain
my
bet - ter
rain
the sun and the
my heart
the
low
so
Stallholder 1 (Male)
al - most
27
on
Than stand - ing up
24
is
been feel - ing
ev - ery thing
A crack in
a - gain,
18
It's rain - ing
Good Joe
joss
pal.
could
sticks.
65
19. Sun and Rain Reprise (Stallholders)

29
mp
Who will buy

f
Such

32
my
fine
of
fen
joss
sive
Who
sticks.
will buy
In - cense burn - ers
shirts
my
Rude
words
In - di - an
di -
ob
joss
sticks.
mp
scene
de
signs.
Such
f
Rude
words
made from some - things you
my
at
of
Look
35
fine
Stallholder 3 (Female)
In - di - an
rect from Ne - pal.
wide range
of
fen
sive
ob
would
scene
de
nor - mal - ly
tic
bath
shirts
soaps
Such
fine
Who will buy
signs.
mp
ex - o
di - rect from Ne - pal.
eat.
Look at
my
my
of
3
wide range
f
Ripe
of
66
38
In - di - an
fen
3

ex - o
joss
sive
tic
bath
Such
fine
Look
at
my
44
rect
from
In - di - an
fen
Ne
mal
ex - o - tic
bath
ly
nor - mal - ly
signs.
eat.
big cresc
signs.
eat.
Rude
words
di -
ob
made from some - thing you would
soaps
shirts
pal.
de
sticks.
can - na - bis
de
3
joss
sive
scene
nor
scene
ripe.
wide range of
Ripe
would
3
f
my
of
made from some - things you
Who will buy
ob
di - rect from Ne - pal.
words
soaps
Rude
can - na - bis
Ensemble
shirts

41
sticks.
ripe.
67

Good Joe +
Marketeers
48
52
feel
the
fall - ing
so much
rain
could
(Brass)
92
Good Joe +
Marketeers
my
face
Build

al -
most
(whisper)
in
the
fall -
ing
no
down
(Brass)
cresc.
can say there is
drown.
Underscore (Dance of Camden Market)
on
Than stand - ing up
76
88
place.
In
rain
55
bet - ter
58
Faster q = 164
It's rain - ing a - gain, it's rain - ing a - gain, it's rain - ing a - gain, it's rain - ing a - gain, it's
rall.
95

rain - ing
a - gain,
it's rain - ing
a - gain,
Slow cakewalk

feel
the
rain
fall - ing
68
98
on
my
face
fall -
ing
down
101
Than stand - ing up
in
104
the
I'm hear - ing

112
ter
pat
it
pit
there is
re - flect - ing the

116
go.
132
136

bet -
139
And no - thing I
Marketeers
feel
ter
place.
In
so much rain I
rain
lights
could
ter
down.

and
have
to
do.
Than stand - ing up
al - most
drown.
so much rain I
could
place.
Bad Joe
on
It's rain - ing a - gain,
fall - ing
In
bet - ter
the
no
can say
al - most drown.
109
It's wet
splash - ing
feet.
in the
No - where to
my
face
in
the
fall -
ing
down
street
(Dialogue)
can say there is
Doo - by doo,
no
doo - by
69
142
doo
145
149
doo
doo.
Doo - by doo, doo - by doo
The
sun
shines
Doo - by doo,

152
doo doo.
doo
doo

155
sun
doo
158
Street
doo.
shines
best
in
the
af
doo
doo
doo.
doo
doo.
doo doo.
The
sun
shines
But
know
doo - by
doo
where
the
doo
doo.
doo.
ter
sey
doo
Ca
doo
doo
doo.
Doo - by doo,
doo
east
Doo - by doo - by doo - by doo
doo - by
west
(Marketeers div.)
doo
doo
doo.
noon
70
161
165
Once
gain
ff
it's
Aah
176
ver
too
ff
soon.
Aah
mp
want - ted was a
ff
Underscore
171
to
keep
word,
x2
Aah

mp
Aah
All
x6
(tacet 6th x)

ff
Aah
ff
a phot - o - graph
Aah
(in church)
(hum)

p
(hum)

p
rall.
1.
2.
71
19a. Simple Equation (Reprise)

Q - Sarah: "No matter how much you love someone,
Joe, there's times in life you can't say yes."
Dad
And sud - den - ly

4

slow -
ly
back
we
got
on
19
mp
the
need
friend - ships
to

have
back
to
right
Skies
all
sud -den
ly
Black
turns
rall.
come
clear.
Dialogue (Judge)
here.

mo
Bad Joe
turns
white
We see how
16
wrong
to

ment

wrecked.
to

re
rall.

flect
Segue
72
20. Primrose Hill / Our House (Reprise)
6X
1-5
Q - Sarah: "Photograph!"
3X - Slower
Clarinet: 1st X only

14
Kath: "And Casey Street will be

wherever you two build it.!"
20
1.2.
25
One
thing
re - mains
that's
3.
Dad + Good Joe
Now we
for
cert
face
ain
the fi
will
nal
cur - tain?
you
all
love
Dialogue break
28
my
36
Q - Emmo: "Smile."
life
but
with - out
you
in
my
life.
Everyone

Our
house
40
Our house
in the mid - dle of
our street. Our house
is our cas - tle and our keep. Our house
in the mid - dle of
our

in
the mid - dle of
our
20. Primrose Hill / Our House (Reprise)
44
Wel - come to
the house
of
fun.
Our
in
the mid - dle
of
50
Wel - come to
street.
53
fun
the
Our
now
I'm come
In
the
56
in
in
the
the
of
age
of
Wel - come to
of
fun
now I've come
of
age.
temp
ta - tion's on
of
Wel - come to
our
of
in
his
way.
the mid - dle
Our
our
our
house
of
Wel - come to
our
street.
Our
li - on's
house
street.
the
the mid - dle
of
mid - dle
the house
Our

mid - dle
house
mid - dle
Our
in
street.
our
den.
house
li - on's
den
of
the
li - on's
the mid - dle
our
in
Wel - come to
house
47
73
den
the house
our
of
house
Sarah: "Where d'you go when

you can to anywhere?"
Joe: "Let's go dancing."
74
21. Bows
14
(Brass)
(Keys 2 - Harmonica / Vibes)

19
24
Sax Solo
29
34
39
(Brass)
1.
2.
21. Bows
q = 123
(Band Bows)
45
Our House
Our
house
in
is
55
our cas - tle
Wel - come
and
our
Wel - come to
the
keep
Our
mid - dle
of
the mid - dle
our
house
of
Our
house
in
the mid - dle
of
our
to
the
house
of
fun
now
I'm
come
of
age
Our
house
in
the
mid - dle
of
the
li - on's
Our
house
den

In
the mid - dle
of
our

in
the mid - dle
of
our
57

in
52
Our house
49
street.
75
our
our
street.
street.
76
22. Encore / Play Out

"One Step Beyond"
q = 152
(Sax pickup)
13
25
45

we

to
had
but
make a diff - erence to
the

at
the
time
it seemed so
Company
Oh what fun
58
(Baggy Trousers)
52
(Sax solo)
18
bad.
22. Encore / Play Out
Oh what fun we had
but
75
78

make
diff - erence to
the
81

77
at
the time
it seemed so bad.
X3 gradual cresc.
Last x Rall
Na
na
na
Play Out
1
TACET
End
to
na
Oi!
APPENDIX - MUSICAL NUMBERS

WRITER / PUBLISHER CREDITS
RETURN OF THE LOS PALMAS SEVEN

Words and Music by Michael Barson, Mark Bedford and Daniel Woodgate
Copyright 1980 by EMI Music Publishing Ltd.
OUR HOUSE
Words and Music by Christopher Foreman and Cathal Smyth
SIMPLE EQUATION
Words and Music by Christopher Foreman and Graham McPherson
MY GIRL
Words and Music by Michael Barson
BAGGY TROUSERS
Words and Music by Michael Barson, Christopher Foreman, Graham McPherson,
Cathal Smyth, Daniel Woodgate, Lee Thompson and Mark Bedford.
EMBARRASSMENT
Words and Music by Michael Barson and Lee Thompson
DRIVING IN MY CAR
SHUT UP
Words and Music by Graham McPherson and Christopher Foreman


Words and Music by Cathal Smyth Michael Barson
NIGHT BOAT TO CAIRO

Words and Music by Michael Barson and Graham McPherson
Copyright 1979 by EMI Music Publishing Ltd.Publisher: Carlin Music Corp.
WINGS OF A DOVE
Words and Music by Graham McPherson and Cathal Smyth
ONE BETTER DAY

RISE AND FALL

NW5
Words and Music by Michael Barson, Christopher Foreman, Mark Bedford,
Graham McPherson, Lee Thompson, Daniel Woodgate and Cathal Smyth.
IT MUST BE LOVE
Words and Music by Labi Siffre
Copyright 1971 by Groovy Music Ltd. / Chrysalis Songs Ltd.

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By TIM F IRTH

Music and Lyrics by MADNESS

LIBRETTO / VOCAL BOOK

Josef Weinberger Limited

Applications to perform this musical must be made,

Orchestrations by Steve Sidwell

2003 WEST END PRODUCTION

THE PRINCIPAL CAST Thumbnails

Notes on the music by

Opening (Instrumental) .....................................................................1

Los Palmas Seven (Underscore) (Instrumental)...................................1

Our House Playoff (Instrumental)......................................................9

Balcony Underscore (Instrumental) ..................................................11

Simple Equation (Dad) ...................................................................11

My Girl (Emmo, Bad Joe, Lewis) .....................................................14

Simple Equation Reprise (Dad) ...................................................18

Magistrates Court (All I Wanted / My Girl) (Kath, Dad, Lads).......19

Baggy Trousers (Reecey, Schoolkids, Mr Jesmond, Bad Joe).................22

Simple Equation Reprise (Dad) ...................................................26

Embarrassment Playoff (Instrumental) ............................................32

Baggy Trousers Underscore (Instrumental) ......................................34

Embarrassment Reprise (Encouragement Version)

Baggy Trousers / Our House Underscore (Instrumental)..................37

My Girl Reprise (Ballad Version) (Sarah, Dad).............................43

Driving In My Car Reprise (Dad, Bad Joe, Salesman)....................43

After Driving In My Car (Instrumental)...........................................45

Simple Equation Reprise (Dad, Chorus)........................................47

The Return Of The Los Palmas Seven (Instrumental) ......................50

Shut Up (Reecey, Coppers, Good Joe ) ................................................52

Tormorrows Just Another Day / The Sun and the Rain

Night Boat To Cairo (Dad) ............................................................60

Night Boat (Vegas Underscore) (Instrumental) ................................61

Wings Of A Dove (Carib Combo, Billie, Angie, All) ........................62

One Better Day (Dad, Good Joe, Chorus, Kath) ...............................64

Our House Reprise (Good Joe, Dad) ............................................67

Rise And Fall (Good Joe, Chorus) .....................................................67

House Of Fun / Rise And Fall / My Girl

Scene Change (Underscore) (Instrumental) .....................................72

N.W.5 (Sarah, Dad, Chorus) ...........................................................75

Embarrassment Reprise (Law Firm)

Underscore (My Girl / NW5 / Simple Equation)

It Must Be Love (Sarah, Good Joe) ..................................................84

The Sun And The Rain Reprise (Stallholders)

Simple Equation (Reprise) (Dad, Bad Joe) ......................................92

Bows (Company) .............................................................................97

Encore / Play Out (Company) .........................................................97

(calls) Leg! Leg! TURN! NOW! (etc.)

What? How!? (As he steers her.) Whoa!

Ive told you! KEEP IT STEADY! THIS IS THE SIMPLEST DANCE IN

(tries to carry on, laughing) It cant be more important than this!

It is! It is! STOP! (Holds him at arms length.) Yr going to be a dad.

Yr kidding. (In wonder.) An its definitely mine?

(deadpan) Its either yours or Clint Eastwoods.

Oh God. Oh wow. (With rapture.) We might be having Clint Eastwoods

The greatest dancers in the world on Margate pier tonight . . . couple

Here he is, the birthday boy!

Ive got something to tell y!