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Dedication
To
Patty Beckerdite
A dear and much-loved friend.
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An angel from
the other realm came and
strengthened me.
Luke 22:43
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Pa r t 1
The Story
As Told By
JESUS
THE CHRIST
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Chapter 1
Pilates wife was having a fitful dream filled with
disturbing images of angels and of innocent men going
to their deaths.
Judas was making his way toward the Maccabaean
Palace, trying hard not to think of what thirty pieces of
silver might buy him.
The night was late, and my mother Mary felt her heart
heavy and deeply troubled.
Over in a prison cell at Antonias Fortress, three prisoners, each well chained, lay awake wondering what it
would be like to have a nail driven through their hands
and then to die of suffocation.
The gnats and flies are the worst part, I was once
told, came the voice of one of the thieves, breaking the
silence of his dungeon.
I do not need to know that, answered another.
Not far behind me, as I walked out of the city and
crossed the Kidron Valley toward the Mount of Olives,
Peter was finding it difficult to keep a small sword hidden
under his robe.
A boy of seven, unable to find sleep, slipped out of his
home and began wandering the city, hoping to find one of
my disciples. He had a question to ask: Why is this night
so dark and foreboding?
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T H E DAY I WAS
crucified
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Chapter 2
The cup spewed its vile venom until the stench of its
contents seemed to fill the winds of earth.
I watched as all the sins of all the sons of Abraham
slipped into the cup. I saw their centuries of rebellion,
idolatry, incest, murder, lies, and deceit make their way
into the cup. The sins of the Hebrew race had now become
one with that cup.
My hands and face began to pour forth blood until the
ground around me was soaked.
I wept again. I called out for deliverance and cried,
Abba! Father!
My body began to shake uncontrollably. So also my
weeping and my cries of terror.
Never had I or any man known the depth of repulsion as I knew it when I saw the wantonness and evil that
poured into that cup.
I would have surely died, but the door to the other
realm opened, allowing an angel to come and minister to
me. The image of the cup faded, but it would return. This
time its images would be still more grotesque.
Struggling to my feet, I forced myself to return to my
disciples. As I stood there, I marked the ground around
me with my blood.
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T H E DAY I WAS
crucified
You could not stay the night with me, could you? I
asked, as I returned to my place of prayer.
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Chapter 3
This time it was not the transgressions of the sons of
Abraham that I saw, but those of the heathen.
Within the cups iniquitous brew I watched the sins
of heathendom spill their idolatry, blasphemy, and the
loathsomeness of all that the heathen imagination could
conjure up. I cried, Oh, the brutality of man toward
man! I saw the battles, the wars, the suffering, the pain
and the staggering depravity of heathendom. All found
their way into the cup.
All the malfeasance of mankind, whether Jew or
heathen, gathered into one place and disappeared
within that cup.
All wickedness waited to mingle with all purity, all
damnation calling out to envelop all righteousness, all
that was heinous waiting to annihilate all holiness. All
waited for me to yield to the cup.
Blood now flowed freely from my head, my face, my
limbs. My very life force was racing to escape that which
waited to become one with me. Mercifully, the cup once
more withdrew.
Once more desirous to see my disciples, I struggled to
stand, and then I collapsed. At last I came to them. Seeing
them asleep, I could not but weep for each and all, even
as I feared that every tear I shed would surely be my last.
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T H E DAY I WAS
crucified
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Chapter 4
The Jews, yes. The heathen, yes. But, oh, must I drink
the draught of the sin of the other realm?
No part of me could grasp the vastness of the incarnate evil which was forming before my eyes. It was not
only my lot to behold the iniquities committed in the
visible realm, but also those monstrous acts committed in
realms unseen.
The cup trembled as the contents of the deeds of the
fallen and accursed citizens of the unseen realm poured
into the cup.
With unspeakable horror I watched the full corruption
of the damned spirits, the foulness of the fallen angelic
host, the perniciousness of the princes of perditionall
flowed into the vomitous brew.
Oh, Father, I cried out with unutterable pain, if
there is any way, please remove this cup from me!
Then in horrendous resignation I cried out, Butif
notthenyourwillbedone.
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Chapter 5
The cup faded once more, and for a moment I
recalled an event which had taken place in past eternity,
in a time before creation. I remembered a lamba lamb
that was slain.
It was slain by my Father, in the age before the eternals. I was that lamb!
I was there in the Father, an offering made before creation. And now that slaying was about to join the physical
creation, to join history, to join space and time.
For a moment my thoughts were suspended, both in
eternity and in the olive grove. Gradually I found myself
standing before eleven sleeping disciples. One of them
cried out in a fitful dream and then fell back into a
deep slumber.
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Chapter 6
The long battle of surrender was over. My Father
and I were in concert together.
I had been asked to drink the dregs of universal sin.
I had yielded. Nonetheless, the horror of it was so great
that it was beyond humankind to comprehend. In fact, not
even Death himself could imagine what awaited me.
Once more I survived the ghastliness of it all only by
the ministering of an angel.
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Dear Lillian
The inimitable pen of Gene Edwards presents this
breathtaking story of the believers relationship to death
and to life hereafter.
Expect the unexpected in Dear Lillian, as Edwards
declares. Lets not start at the point of death, as it is the
middle of the story. Let us return, first, to the time before
creation. Your story of life, death and your place in future
eternity begins before the creation.
Rich in hope and abounding with comfort, there has
never been a book like Dear Lillian.
Available wherever books are sold.
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