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Jm Ycasas

Carol Damgen
Interpersonal Communication
November 19, 2009
Dan in Real Life Analysis
1) Examples of Confirming Communication:
Recognition- In the scene where Dan and Marie first meet in the bookstore, Marie asks Dan for
some help in finding a book for her to read. She doesnt choose to find a book herself but she
instead recognizes him and asks him for help.
Acknowledgement- Following the bookstore scene, Marie and Dan share coffee and a plant
muffin, and Dan reveals a lot to Marie about his past. She acknowledges him by being respectful
and listening to his story.
Examples of Disconfirming Communication:
Impervious Response- In the bookstore scene, Marie asks the man working there for help but he
is on the phone. Rather than actually helping her he tells her to wait a minute, blows her off and
keeps on talking.
Impervious Response- In the scene where Dan walks in on Marie washing her face and theyre in
the bathroom, Dans daughter, Jane, walks in, and Dan is forced to get into the shower. Marie is
also somewhat forced to get into the shower also and pseudo listens to Janes problems. Not that
she means to, but Marie doesnt give Jane her full attention.
2) Face-threatening Acts:
-In the scene where Dans parents are talking to Dan in his room, lots of other people come in
trying to do their laundry. Rather than listen to his parents, Dan avoids and makes light of the
subject by just telling everybody to come in while his parents tell them its a private
-During the football game scene, Jane confronts Dan about flirting with Marie. Dan obviously
denies it by saying that he wasnt flirting Jane says he doesnt have to deny it because she
already covered him when Lily asked.
3) Cognitive Dissonance

Attacking the Critic- Cara clearly verbally attacks Dan when she sends her boyfriend hope after
he discovers them making out during the family retreat. She calls him a murderer of love and
yells at him for not understanding that she loves him.
Distorting Critical Information- During the dinner, Dan constantly tries to change the topic off of
Marie but fails to do so. He gets to the point where he lists off all of Mitchs previous girlfriends
and ruins the mood but later on, Mitch rationalizes what he Dan did by telling him what he did
was ok because they are brothers.
Avoiding Dissonant Information:
Repression(?)- The scene where the whole family is walking along the shore has some kind of
avoidance. Dans father wants to talk to Dan about possibly dating again and why he is feeling so
down and distant but Dan is quick to say that he does not want to talk about it. He would rather
just walk in silence on the shore.
4) Seeking More Information- When Dan talks to Cara about her relationship with Marty
Barasco, she accuses him of not understanding. However, Dan responds nondefensively by
asking how she can know that she loves him after only knowing him for two weeks.
-When Dan and Marie are caught kissing in the bowling alley, Mitch accuses Dan of what he is
doing. Dan seeks more information by asking You guys broke up, right?
Agree with the Critic- When Dan finally reaches the end of his rope, Dan talks to his daughters
about how he has not been the best father. He acknowledges that he hasnt let Jane try driving, or
Cara date boys, but especially the fact that he blew off Lily and he apologizes to each of them.
-After Dan is caught with Marie, he feels terrible and knows that Mitch is really hurt and really
dislikes him at the moment. However, Dan accepts that what happened was not something he
should have done and tries, unsuccessfully, to apologize to Mitch.