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Toxic Relationships
Jay Koontz
Interpersonal Communications
Toxic Relationships
Toxic Relationships
Relationships. We all would like to be in a relationship, whether it be
just a regular friendship between male to female, male to male, or female to
female or a romantic relationship in the same fashion; we would all like to be
in relationship of some shape or form. There are various types of
relationships: family relationships, friend relationships, romantic relationships
and casual relationships2 as with any of these relationships, any of them
have the ability to become toxic, some of them more than others, but
nonetheless they can become toxic. Websters Dictionary defines a
relationship as the way in which two or more peopledeal with each other
as well as being defined as the way in which two or more people or things
are connected.1
A toxic relationship is a relationship characterized by behaviors on the
part of the toxic partner that are emotionally and, not infrequently, physically
damaging to their partner.3 While a healthy relationship gives into ones selfesteem and emotional energy, a toxic relationship does the exact opposite
and destroys self-esteem and siphons away energy. A healthy relationship
means that there is an equal balance of caring, sharing, compassion and
respect between ourselves and our significant other. A healthy relationship is
a safe place, meaning, it is a relationship where we can be ourselves
without fear, a relationship where we feel comfortable and secure. A toxic
Jay Koontz
Interpersonal Communications
Toxic Relationships
Jay Koontz
Interpersonal Communications
Toxic Relationships
this is the most extreme toxic individual, they are the ones that are watching
your every move, checking your phone behind your back, keeping you close
when you go out, they are paranoid.3
All of the aforementioned are a few common types of toxic individuals
that we should avoid, but, we usually would not know the type until we are
deeper into the relationship so it is extremely hard to avoid, that which we
do not know. Next, we go in to why we stay in a toxic relationship.
POINT 3: WHY WE STAY IN TOXIC RELATIONSHIPS
Obviously, the big question is, why do people stay in toxic
relationships? Knowing that they have nothing to gain from them or that they
are going to continue to be hurt. According to an article written by Sherrie
Carter in High Octane Women, there are many reasons why people stay in
unhealthy or toxic relationships, but the most common one is underlying
low self-esteem that makes some people believe that they dont deserve
anything better.4 We may also label those who hang around in a toxic
relationship as co-dependent.3 , another reason why people stay in or are
afraid of leaving a toxic relationship because they may say Will I ever find
love again? or Im going to be alone forever and they instill fear into their
own minds. Fear is a trait that every human has, whether they want to admit
it or not. We as humans are all afraid of something. With that being said, the
next logical course of action is getting out of the toxic relationship.
Jay Koontz
Interpersonal Communications
Toxic Relationships
Jay Koontz
Interpersonal Communications
Toxic Relationships
not a gift, they might do this in hopes to keep the person who is giving,
buying, paying for around to keep doing it. While that example highlights the
person who has been giving, and not the User, if the person giving decides to
leave and the two individuals were really good friends, not only has it
damaged a really good friendship, but, the User may in the long run realize
that they have messed up, and theyve lost a good friend and ruined a good
friendship.
This example of a toxic relationship hurt the person who was giving,
because they were being drained mentally, and emotionally, but it also could
in theory hurt the other person by opening their eyes to what they have
destroyed, and if for instance, the two were childhood friends, the User may
realize hes destroyed that bond thats been there for many years.
Jay Koontz
Interpersonal Communications
Toxic Relationships
Jay Koontz
Interpersonal Communications
Toxic Relationships
Works Cited
1. "Relationship." Merriam-Webster. Merriam-Webster, Web. 28 Nov. 2014.
2. Ransohoff, Julia, Nancy Brown, PhD, and Christina Jeffery. "Types of Relationships."
For Teens. Palo Alto Medical Foundation, 1 Oct. 2013. Web. 28 Nov. 2014.
3. Cory, Thomas L., PhD. "Toxic Relationships." Health Scope RSS2. Health Scope
Magazine, Web. 28 Nov. 2014.
4. Carter, Sherrie. "The Hidden Health Hazards of Toxic Relationships." Psychology Today:
Health, Help, Happiness + Find a Therapist. High Octane Women, 11 Aug. 2011. Web.
28 Nov. 2014.
5. Borchard, Therese. "You Deplete Me: 10 Steps to End a Toxic Relationship." You Deplete