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II. Discovering Meaning

2. Topics, Main Ideas, and
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READING
A group of psychology researchers have made the
breakthrough discovery that prepare to be astounded
males and females are different.
TUNING IN TO READING
A popular advice book by John Gray is titled Men Are from Mars, Women Are from
Venus. Do you think men and women are so different that they might as well be from
different planets? Think about your own personal experiences with this issue before
reading the following article.
BIO-SKETCH
Dave Barry, the Pulitzer Prizewinning columnist, is also the author of numerous bestselling books including Dave Barrys Complete Guide to Guys, from which this excerpt
is taken. The New York Times calls Barry the funniest man in America. His life was featured in the hit TV show Daves World. He lives in Miami with his wife, a sportswriter for
the Miami Herald, and his two children, who, according to Barry, do not think he is funny.
NOTES ON VOCABULARY
Hindenburg an airship (dirgible) named after the president of Germany, Paul von
Hindenburg. The airship was inated with highly ammable hydrogen gas. On May 6,
1937, the Hindenburg caught re. The ames quickly engulfed the ship, and of the
97 people on board, 35 were killed.
Smurfs little blue cartoon characters created by the artist Peyo. The Smurfs became a worldwide success after a television show featuring them premiered in 1981.
Smurf plush toys, gurines, video games, and CDs are still popular with children and
collectors.
subatomic particles smaller than an atom.
syndrome a pattern of behavior that tends to occur under certain circumstances; a
number of symptoms that occur together to make up a particular condition.

Neither Man nor Rat Can Properly Fold Laundry

Copyright 2010 by The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc.

BY DAVE BARRY

re you a male or a female? To nd out,

take this scientic quiz:
2
Your department is on a tight deadline
for developing a big sales proposal, but
youve hit a snag on a key point. You want
to go one way; a co-worker named Bob
strongly disagrees. To break the deadlock,
you:
3
Present your position, listen to the
other side, then fashion a workable compromise.
4
Punch Bob.

Your favorite team is about to win the

championship, but at the last second the
victory is stolen away by a terrible referees
call. You:
6
Remind yourself that its just a game,
and that there are far more important
things in your life.
7
Punch Bob again.
8
HOW TO SCORE: If you answered
b to both questions, then you are a male.
I base this statement on a recent article
in The New York Times about the way
5

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Reading and All That Jazz:
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animals, including humans, respond to

stress. According to the article, a group of
psychology researchers have made the
breakthrough discovery thatprepare to be
astoundedmales and females are different.
9
The researchers discovered this by
studying both humans and rats, which are
very similar to humans except that they are
not stupid enough to purchase lottery tickets. The studies show that when males are
under stress, they respond by either ghting or running away (the so-called ght
or ight syndrome), whereas females respond by nurturing others and making
friends (the so-called tend and befriend
syndrome).
10 This nding is big news in the psychology community, which apparently is
located on a distant planet. Here on Earth,
we have been aware for some time that
males and females respond differently to
stress. We know that if two males bump
into each other, they will respond like this:
11 FIRST MALE: Hey, watch it!
12 SECOND MALE: No, YOU watch it!
13 FIRST MALE: Oh yeah? (They deliberately bump into each other again.)
14 Two females, in the identical situation,
will respond like this:
15 FIRST FEMALE: Im sorry!
16 SECOND FEMALE: No, its my fault!
17 FIRST FEMALE: Say, those are cute
shoes! (They go shopping.)
18 If the psychology community needs
further proof of the difference between
genders, I invite it to attend the party held
in my neighborhood each Halloween. This
party is attended by several hundred small
children, who are experiencing stress because their bloodstreamsas a result of
the so-called trick or treat syndrome
contain roughly the same sugar content
as Cuba. Heres how the various genders
respond:
19 The females, 97 percent of whom
are dressed as either a ballerina or a princess,
sit in little social groups and exchange
candy.

The males, 97 percent of whom

are dressed as either Batman or a Power
Ranger, run around making martial-arts
noises and bouncing violently off each
other like crazed subatomic particles.
21 Here are some other gender-based syndromes that the psychology community
might want to look into:
22 The laundry refolding syndrome:
This has been widely noted by both me
and a friend of mine named Jeff. What happens is, the male will attempt to fold a piece
of laundry, and when hes done, the female,
with a look of disapproval, will immediately pick it up and re-fold it so that its
much neater and smaller. My wife can
make an entire bed sheet virtually disappear, reports Jeff.
23 The
inatable-pool-toy syndrome: From the dawn of human civilization, the task of inating the inatable pool
toy has always fallen to the male. It is often
the female who comes home with an inatable pool toy the size of the Hindenburg,
causing the youngsters to become very
excited. But it is inevitably the male
who spends two hours blowing the toy up,
after which he keels over with skin the
color of a Smurf, while the kids, who have
been helping out by whining impatiently,
leap joyfully onto the toy, puncturing it
immediately.
24 I think psychology researchers should
nd out if these syndromes exist in other
species. They could put some rats into a
cage with tiny pool toys and miniature
pieces of laundry, then watch to see what
happens. My guess is that there would be
ghting. Among the male researchers, I
mean. Its a shame, this male tendency
toward aggression, which has caused so
many horrible problems, such as war and
ice hockey. It frankly makes me ashamed of
my gender.
25 Im going to punch Bob.
20

Dave Barry, Neither Man Nor Rat Can Properly Fold Laundry, The Miami Herald, July 2, 2000. Copyright
2000 by Dave Barry. Reprinted with permission.

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MatherMcCarthy:
Reading and All That Jazz:
Tuning Up Your Reading,
Thinking, and Study Skills,
Fourth Edition

CHAPTER 2

45

II. Discovering Meaning

2. Topics, Main Ideas, and
The McGrawHill
Reading and All That Jazz: Tuning Up Your Reading, Thinking, and Study Skills, Fourth Edition
through Structure
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Topics, Main Ideas, and Details

127

COMPREHENSION CHECKUP

Write the main idea of the article below.

Main idea:
Why do you think Dave Barry wrote this article?

Multiple Choice
Directions: For each item, write the letter corresponding to the best answer.
1. From this article, you could conclude that
a. women do a poor job of folding the laundry.
b. girls like to be Super Heroes for Halloween.
c. many men would rather ght than compromise.
d. men and women react similarly to stress.
2. What is the meaning of the phrase hit a snag as used in paragraph 1?
a. encounter a problem or obstacle
b. run into an unexpected difculty
c. both a and b
d. none of the above
3. The topic of this article is
a. the inatable pool toy syndrome.
b. aggression.
c. gender differences in response to stress.
d. the problems with excessive sugar consumption.

Copyright 2010 by The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc.

4. The article is meant to be

a. amusing.
b. shocking.
c. serious.
d. grim.
5. From this article, you could assume that the author
a. thinks buying lottery tickets is a good idea.
b. disapproves of buying lottery tickets.
c. thinks buying lottery tickets is fun.
d. thinks rats should learn to purchase lottery tickets.
6. The author would agree that
a. males and females are different.
b. scientists spend too much time investigating the obvious.
c. males are likely to respond more aggressively to stress than females.
d. all of the above.
7. The author ends the article with
a. examples of the male tendency to nurture.
b. examples of the male tendency to settle disagreements by ghting.
c. praise of male aggressiveness.
d. examples of female cooperation.

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MatherMcCarthy:
II. Discovering Meaning
FULLERTON COLLEGE
Reading and All That Jazz:
through Structure
Tuning Up Your Reading,
Thinking, and Study Skills,
Fourth Edition

2. Topics, Main Ideas, and

Details

The McGrawHill
Companies, 2010

PART 2 Discovering Meaning through Structure

128

8. According to the author, after two males bump into each other, they
a. deliberately bump each other again.
b. settle their differences with sts.
c. apologize profusely.
d. go watch a hockey game together.
9. An antonym for the word befriend as used in paragraph 9 is
a. assist.
b. support.
c. antagonize.
d. counsel.
10. An antonym for the word dawn as used in paragraph 23 is
a. daybreak.
b. daydream.
c. sunset.
d. midnight.

True or False
Directions: Indicate whether each statement is true or false by writing T or F in the
space provided.
11. According to the author, ight is the same as running away.
12. The authors quiz to determine if someone is male or female is wellrespected by the scientic community.
13. The author is exaggerating the amount of sugar consumption by young
children at the neighborhood Halloween party.
14. The young boys at the Halloween party behave in a docile fashion.
15. The laundry refolding syndrome has been researched by the scientic
community.
16. The author is exaggerating when he asserts that only men blow up
inatable pool toys.

Vocabulary in Context
Directions: Look at the italicized words in the following sentences. Do these sentences
make sense (S) or are they nonsense (N)?
1. In a major medical breakthrough, doctors at Johns Hopkins discovered a
new treatment for early stage lung cancer.
2. Puncturing a balloon will cause it to inate rapidly.
3. The vice presidents vote broke a Senate deadlock so that the bill could pass.
4. The teacher was astounded that so many of her past students attended
her retirement party.
5. Marla did such a good job nurturing her plants that all of them died.
6. A new day dawned with the invention of the printing press.
7. All was smooth sailing once the merger hit a snag.
8. Miriams grade for the research paper dropped because she turned it in
past the deadline.
9. They compromised by agreeing to take turns driving the car to work.
10. Marco has to stay in bed for long periods of time because of chronic
fatigue syndrome.