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VOLUME FOUR

I S S U E 30

0 7 . 2 3 .15

Another year,
another Geezerfest!
Around & About, Page 6

Goaded Into It

Farberer on Space

Football Jones

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David Goad:
Menace 2 NB

All original content is copyright

TX Citizen. TX Citizen is published
every Thursday.

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Around
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Farberer on Space
Ed talks Pluto and whatnot.

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1 WORD

Its Clobberin Time!

WITH

after the stories we

MIKE fordo,going
especially the Chamber
REYNOLDS of Commerce stuff. While

Last week, I wrapped this

column up with a bit called
I am a beaten man. It was
intended figuratively. This week, I
actually am a beaten man. Got to ride in an
ambulance and everything. Here, Ill explain:

Crazy Town
There are many professions that require a
body to deal with crazy people, but there are
three that put one in direct contact with hostile
crazy people on the regular. Those three jobs
are police officer, politician, and journalist.
Here at the TX Citizen, where we hammer on
the Chamber of Commerce, the 4-B Board,
and City Hall on a regular basis, the insane
accuse us of being on the Chambers payroll
or working for 4-B or doing City Councils
bidding all the time. Its a constant barrage of
Youre covering for Commissioners Court or
You let the District Attorney off the hook, all
while were the only media outlet taking any
of them to task. Its surreal.
Heres another one we get a lot: You
hide behind words. We dont hide behind
anything. Everybody knows exactly who
we are and where we stand. If a bridge
must burn to get relevant information to the
public, it burns without question - I offer my
relationships with the Chambers Michael
Meek, former Mayor Gale Pospisil, and
former Mayor Pro-Tem Kathleen Krueger
as examples. I was on excellent terms with
all those people before I started covering
them in earnest. More recently, District One
Councilman George Dont you know who
I am? Green was added to the tote board.
We were tight with George, right up until he
tried to get the Fair Associations lease with
the City revoked for preventing him, a City
official, from parking in a restricted area.
Because racism.
TXCITIZEN.COM

Weve paid a steep price

as

popular

as

ever

with

you, dear reader, theres a

whole class of businesses that

DONT PANIC!
am
ce Cre rg!
I
r
u
O
cksbu
i

Freder
is from

Store Hours

Tues - Fri: 11 to 6
Sat: 10 to 3
Sun & Mon: Closed

would benefit from pointing their

advertising at your face, but refuse to
because of our stance on the Chambers
incestuous relationship with City Hall. We
put our money where our collective mouf is.
To say otherwise is insane.
I digress. I just wanted to give you an
idea of the crazy we put up with. Right here

Duckys

Union St
Union St
Station

283 S Union St
512.757.7846
foreverdancenb.com

I have an example of the crazy that City Hall

puts up with. Weve transcribed David The
and Eighth Wonder of the World, Barron
Casteel at the July 13 Council Meeting.
in Council Chambers after a six-month
prohibition from coming onto any portion
of any and all municipal buildings, offices,
appurtenant

facilities,

and

adjacent

parking lots located anywhere throughout

the city, including but not limited to: City
Hall, City Council Chambers, Honors
Hall, any public common areas such as
the front lobby at City Hall and sidewalks
that border municipal buildings. The ban
was Goads penalty for punching Thor
Thornhill, CEO of HMT Engineering, for
being too loud in the Council overflow
room during a meeting.
Anyway, heres how Litigant vs Mayor
went down. The topic was a yes/no vote on a
grant application to FEMA for Federal funds
dedicated to flood mitigation assistance, and
acquisition and demolition of flood plain
properties. Thats it. Once Goad stepped to
the microphone, it was clear FEMA wouldnt
be mentioned for the duration of his rant.

Continued on page 4.

Tues - Sat 11:30-7

Closed
Sunday & Monday

Duckys

Union St
Union St
Station

283 South Un ion St

979.450.6473
babycaketruf fles.com

Litigant Goads confrontation with Mayor,

Note: Goad has been permitted back

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Goad: I am on the topic at hand.

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Continued from page 3.

Goads entire act is rooted in domination,

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intimidation, and swerving the conversation

to whatever he wants to talk about at the

Casteel: You may not be able to finish if

you dont get to the topic at hand as quickly
as possible, sir.

time, and the Mayor wasnt having any more

Goad: If you interrupt me I cant cause

I lose track. It says the average household
Goad: This has to do with some fees
income was $52,227 in 2000. In 2013
going here. You remember when I told you
of it. It was heated:

NW

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earlier that were constantly paying two or

three hundred percent more than anywhere
else in the country? Well Im speaking for

Casteel: Again,
TOPIC, SIR

NOT

ON

THE

the people back here (indicates audience).

Goad: Yes I am! When it went up to

53,000. (To audience) So in 13 years your
side pays for it (indicates audience). And
folkses (sic) income, on average in Texas went
that, if you can see it up there (on monitor) it
up 800, now Ill tell you why. This is why.
says Are you better off in 2000 when Perry
Appraisal fees going into friends pocket when
took office
it should be three hund $400 max per unit,
theres three properties 4,500, environmental
Casteel: Sir, if youll move to the motion impact survey, people, this is going on on
as quickly as possible.
every project in New Braunfels, hundreds
of millions of dollars are being placed in
Goad: What motion?
engineers pockets and other peoples pocket
that nobody else in this nation pays for, and
Casteel: If youll move to the topic at you dont know about it. (To Council) Where
hand as quickly as possible.
were going to get to some other ones on
the other projects, I wanted to lay this out
Goad: You know, when you interrupt because you got other projects Im going to
me thats very rude. And Im
show you more of this, how you pad bills,
to, to supplement $250,000 to some of your
Casteel: I will continue to do so when friends. I know why you block me, cause try
you go off and waste this communitys time. to confuse me, you know I have a heart issue
and you know you confuse me cause my
Goad: No Im not because in here you medications cause dont want the public to
have appraisal fee of $4,500, and I just know what Ive put together over eight years.
explained myself Im going to get into you And they are going to get to know it.
This side spends it (indicates Council), this

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Thats Goads rant in its entirety. See,

Casteel: $4,500 for three properties, sir. the topic was FEMA funds, but Goad wanted
Please get to the point as quickly as possible. to talk about something else, so by gods
he wasnt going to talk about FEMA funds.
Goad: Thats right I called three of Goads attitude and tone of voice add a lot
your appraisers around here the rates 375, to this, so we went ahead and pinned the
375, and 400. So why are you paying your two-minute video to the top of our Facebook
page at facebook.com/txcitizen. Go have a
buddies $4,500?
look. How the Mayor didnt come across the
Casteel: Ok. Thank you again Mr Goad dais at Goad is beyond our understanding.
Last year, District Six Councilman
Stephen
Diggs had had enough of Goad,
Goad: Now may I finish?
prompting him to send the following missive
to the Citys IT department:
Casteel: Please get to the topic.
AD SALES 830.358.2493

Kern, I keep trying to block this asshole records NOW start acting like a reporter
and it keeps coming through. I do not want to and publish all the FACTS.
see any shit from this guy,.(sic) Can you make
One day someone with some balls will
it happen?
publish the millions upon millions in no-bids
going to locals who should be put in jail
Goad is a civic menace. He takes up a for the poor quality of work they perform,
ridiculous amount of time at Council meetings mainly Owens.
hurling insults and spinning convoluted, offDavid Goad
topic rants that serve no purpose other than
to grease his ego. Just like everyone else, he
Me: Fuck off.
gets five minutes at the start of every meeting
to discuss any off-agenda topic he wants
Goad: You never were man enough to
to talk about. After that comment period, face a man with those words PUSSY
Council starts running the agenda, and
agenda items are to be discussed exclusively.
Naturally, the next time I saw him, I felt
Every other person who speaks to Council is it incumbent to tell him to fuck off face-toable to abide by this rule.
face. I dont know why hed think I wouldnt.
Its time to give Goad a police escort I say that to at least one person a day. Last
out of Council Chambers each time he insists Friday was his turn. Heres how that went:
on abusing the public attention span. None
of us have all night to sit there enduring
endless narcissistic madness, no matter how
entertaining it is.

Not Just the Mayors Problem

Is this a moral failing on my part? Most

definitely, and Im going to pay for it. There
will be legal consequences, and Goad will
now attempt to seize everything I own. The
Litigant will be a major part of my life for the
next few years as he drags me this-way-andthat through court. But you know, hes been
screwing with a whole pack of people for a
good long while, and no matter what happens,
Ill always be the guy that gave him a taste
of what he deserves. Plus another restraining
order against him to add to his collection.
By the way, if youre inclined to fight
with The Litigant, be aware that you will be
knocked near unconscious, or worse. This is
no joke. While hes not accustomed to taking a
punch, court records show that hes got plenty
of experience throwing hands, especially at
people significantly younger than him. You
will ride in the ambulance. You will get the
Me: Fuck off.
brain scan. I cannot, in good conscience,
recommend you engage David Goad. Unless
Goad: Youre a pussy.
youre a cop, in which case I suggest the
regular and enthusiastic use of a nightstick.
Me: Really? I just told you to fuck off
Ill have to review the security camera
to your face. Id have thought youd be footage to know what exactly happened
satisfied now.
between the time he clocked me and when I was
wheeled off the premises, but there is one more
Goad: You would do it in public, pussy. thing I remember. As Goad made a fast exit
Pussy, pussy, pussy, pussy. You hide behind while I waited for the police, he wasnt wearing
words, you pussy.
his signature smug expression anymore.

Hes not just a pain in the neck to City Hall.

Were on his mailing list as well, and have
been since the old NB Citizen days, back in
2011, when he would threaten us with legal
action every week for throwing the paper
in his driveway. Never-ending combative
So I punched him.
nonsense, from a guy that considers himself,
despite constant losses in court, a legal
As a witness told police while EMTs were
expert, and is clearly itching for a fight so
strapping
me onto a stretcher, Ive never
he can then file a lawsuit. Heres our latest
exchange via the electronic mail, wherein seen an old guy (Goad) kick somebodys ass
Goad explains my job to me, as if, somehow, like that.
The only thing I remember about the
Im accountable to him in any way:
whole event is punching Goad, Goad
Goad: Mike, it appears you are near punching me, and then Goad punching me
the last when it comes to learning of the again while I was being restrained by three
corruption here. The first news of corruption I very nice gentlemen. Ah, sportsmanship
The witness said I was knocked to the
was told about in NB was the undervalue of
taxes for the good-ol-boys. When I called the ground and got back up to go after Goad,
Zit-tong about nine years ago they refused to and kept going after him even though I was
write about it. When i checked Camarenos being held back. I dont remember any of
taxes I found the same and planned to use it. that, but apparently, even after a major
The part about your story that blow to head, Im a scrappy little fellah. Still
undermines you is YOU DID NOT LIST THOSE cant open my mouth wide enough to eat a
INVOLVED. Privacy is simply BULL SHIT, you sandwich, but hey, we all know I can afford
got your info the same place i did county to drop a few pounds.
TXCITIZEN.COM

\m/
Mike Reynolds
Publisher/Editor-in-Chief
Postscript: Goad was due in court
Monday for an arraignment on a completely
unrelated assault with bodily injury charge.
According to the District Clerks office, he
failed to appear.

HAPPY COW
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&

G R I L L

Thursday
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Manado and Allison

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with ED FARBERER

I was a kid when the Age of Space Exploration

began. I have watched in fascination as
we have moved from rudimentary low-orbit
satellites to the recent exploration of Pluto.
In the early days of the Space Race, the
Ruskies were kicking our butts. The Soviets
were the first to build intercontinental ballistic
missiles, send satellites into space, send a
man into space, send a woman into space,
walk in space, orbit the moon, land stuff on
the moon, explore other planets, etc.
In fact, the USSRs domination of space
sent shivers down US spines with the fear
that, while in space, the Soviets would drop
persuasive literature that would turn all redblooded Americans into Communists.
We should remember, though, that the
noble goal of going faster and farther was born
out of the two super powers attempts to find a
better a spacier way of killing one another.
Eventually, though, little by little, the
Americans moved ahead of the Russians,
due in no small part to the US confiscating a
number of Nazi rocket engineers after the war.
Naturally, every kid in the nation wanted
to be an astronaut. This was primarily
because if you are an astronaut, you are the
coolest person in the room no matter where
you go. The second significant reason why
we all wanted to be astronauts was because
we were reared on fantastical science fiction
tales, where space was a place full of freeflowing adventure and mystery.
Our understanding of space has grown
exponentially since Sputnik 1 was launched
in 1957. We have traveled in space and
landed on another body, we have landed
rovers on other planets, we have sent
satellites to orbit far-flung bodies, and have
telescopes in space. We have even found
planets orbiting other stars.
We have learned a lot and, just
as important, have developed a keen
understanding about what it is we dont know.
But, I dont know, it all seems different, a little
less fantastical. This is because with knowledge,
we lose mystery. This isnt a bad thing, but just
one of the bitter-sweet effects of progress.
When I was young, space was pretty much
6

all mystery we didnt know squat. Because

of that, everything seemed possible. To get to
another planet, you simply climbed into your Art
Deco-styled rocket ship and flew away. Now,
of course, we understand the vast distances of
space. For example, it took New Horizons more
than nine years to fly to Pluto, which is even
longer than it takes to drive to El Paso.
In popular media before the Space
Age, the deep regions beyond Earth made
a boop sound, rockets took only short
time to land on distant worlds, and space
explorers wore silver suits and glass bowls on
their heads. Oh, and there were laser guns.
Everything was all so possible. After all, how
did we know what was truly on other planets
if we have never been there?
Now,
because
of
our
greater
understanding of space, we know that we
will not meet sexy green women from Venus.
This is because Venus has sulfuric acid in
its atmosphere, put there by sulfuric-acidspewing volcanoes. Venus is a messed up
planet and best avoided.
Of course, this isnt to say that our solar
system isnt fascinating it is. Jupiter has
enormous storms, Saturn still has rings and
Uranus is on its side. Besides the planets,
there are also numerous moons, some as
interesting as their planets.
Beyond our solar system, the Hubble
Space Telescope has shown us all just how
beautiful and busy our universe is. We also
know there are big holes in space. I should
also mention that space is mostly made up
of dark stuff we barely understand.
The most mysterious of all the mysteries is
the Big Bang, which created all matter in the
universe in one spectacular moment. There
was nothing, and then there was everything.
No, our universe is an incredibly
fascinating place, more massive than the mind
can conceive and made up of a multitude
of dimensions that we cannot comprehend.
And, it continues to expand.
However, I am a bit wistful that we wont
be visited by people from Pluto who speak
like robots and have weird spindly things
sticking out their heads.

BBW
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Thu 7.23
Scott Boddicker
6pm

The Pour Haus

V
YOUR LI

Alpine Haus Restaurant

Hipsonic

Off the Grid Polka Band

8:30pm

6pm

Fri 7.24

Fools of the Trade

8pm

Billys Ice House

Wes Nickson

3 Man Front
Jam Night

6:30pm

6pm

RC Sanders

8pm

Gruene Hall
Roger Creager

Manado and Allison

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8pm

7pm, $25

On the Rocks

5pm

Devils Hollow
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6pm

9pm

Billys Ice House

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Concerts in the Park

5pm
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7:30pm

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The Pour Haus

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8:30pm

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8pm

9pm

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Broseph
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Sat 7.25

7pm, $20

2pm

7:30pm

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Ken Raba

The Catherine Denise Band

On the Rocks

Billys Ice House

Do Good Texas
2pm

Gruene Hall
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6pm

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The Pour Haus

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5pm

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River Road Ice House

Johnny Chops

Two Ton Tuesday

7:30pm

The Pour Haus

Lucas Jack

Open Mic

5pm

w/ Jon Magill

Lone Star Float House

4pm

Vineyard at Gruene

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Wed 7.29

The Pour Haus

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7pm

Vino en Verde
LeAnn & Jason Soul Duo

4:30pm

Jade Marie Patek

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8:30pm

8:30pm

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Vino en Verde

Sun 7.26

Soul Sessions

TBA

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Mon 7.27

JJ Garrett Band
6pm

Gruene Hall
Bo Porter
7pm

The Pour Haus

Smokehouse Guitar Army

2pm

JJ Villareal

The Adam Johnson Band

8:30pm

6pm

Tues 7.28
Kori Free & the Groove Hounds

Billys Ice House

Aaron Stephens
8pm

Gruene Hall
The Georges
7pm

The Pour Haus

Kerosene Drifters
8pm

River Road Ice House

3pm
7pm

Gruene Hall

TBA

8pm

Lucas Taylor

6pm

Tony Taylor
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Billys Ice House

Colton ONeill Band

8pm

Vineyard at Gruene

Joel Hofmann

Austin Gilliam

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JULY 30

@ 6 JAM NIGHT
TXCITIZEN.COM

SOUND TOWN
OUT
OF

Fri 7.24
Cheatham Street Warehouse
Paul Cauthen
9pm

The Continental Club

The Blues Specialists
6:30pm
Two Tons of Steel, Thunderchiefs
10pm, $10

Sat 7.25
Cheatham Street Warehouse
TBA
9pm

The Continental Club

Cornell Hurd, 3:30pm
Chaparral, Two Hoots & a Holler
10pm, $10

Robert Kraft Trio, 8:30pm

Hillary York, 8:30pm

Snizz & Friends, 10:30pm, $5

Lee Barber, 10:30pm

Floores Country Store

Floores Country Store

Jamey Johnson

Gary P Nunn

w/ Chris Hennessee

7pm, $12-$15

7pm, $30-$35

Luckenbach Dance Hall

Hayden Whittington
1pm
Jimmy Lee Jones, Action Jackson
4pm
Almost Patsy Cline Band
8pm

Sams Burger Joint

Luckenbach Dance Hall

Clayton Gardner
1pm
Max Stalling
w/ Parker McCollum

Party All Night - Sleep Until Noon

All in One Spot

THE

new

Prickly
Pear Bar

30 seconds
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to BedROOM
the

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Freiheit Country Store

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Happy Cow

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Old Ice House

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In The Ramada INN
830.625.8017

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Wednesdays, Fridays, Saturdays

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Thursday Nights

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Eric Tessmer Band

Jimmy Spacek & Catherine Denise

w/ Smokehouse Guitar Army

Karaoke

8pm, $7-$45

8pm, $10-$40

Thursdays, Saturdays

Stubbs BBQ

Stubbs BBQ

The Family Crest

w/ Goodnight Texas
8pm, Inside, $15

Triple Crown
Bill Jerram
6pm

Gobi
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10

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MOS T WAN T ED Freeman

COMAL COUNTYS
ALEMAN,
ARTURO JR

Male 505 180 lbs

DOB: 01/28/1954
CHARGE: Motion to
revoke probation for
driving while
intoxicated 3rd
or more

COREY,
KITTY MARIE

Female 506 150 lbs

DOB: 01/21/1982
CHARGE: Motion to
proceed with
adjudication for bail
jumping and fail
to appear

GARRISON,
ANTONINO,
MEDELLIN, JESSE
RODRIGUEZ
FRANK
JOSEPH JR DONALD WAYNE
Male 601
507 185
200 lbs
lbs
Male
Male 511 155 lbs
DOB: 01/01/1976
DOB:
01/01/1957
CHARGE:
Possession
DOB: 02/27/1949
CHARGE:
Motion to
of a controlled
CHARGE: Failure to
revoke
probation
for
substance
pg 1 under
appear
for driving while
1
gram
and
theft
of
driving while
property
under
$1500
intoxicated 3rd or more
intoxicated 3rd
with 2 or more
or
more convictions
previous

BETHUNE,
JOSEPH THOMAS
Male 510 145 lbs
DOB: 12/19/1982
CHARGE:
Possession of a
controlled substance
pg1 under 1g

GANN,
AMBER P

GUERRERO,
JAIME
Male 507 130 lbs
DOB: 10/04/1971
CHARGE: Failure to
appear for driving while
intoxicated 3rd or more

MEZA, RICARDO
INDALECIO
Male 506 380 lbs

Female 506 185 lbs

DOB: 06/08/1983
CHARGE: CT I Failure to
DOB: 04/16/1985
appear for possession w/intent
CHARGE: Motion to
to deliver controlled sunstance
revoke probation for
pg1 over 4g under 200g and
bail jumping and failure
CT II Failure to appear for
possession controlled
to appear

ED

T
ARRES

substance pg1 under 1g

GARCIA,
TASHA LEA

ZAMORA,
JESSE ANTHONY

Male 509 185 lbs

Female 505 140 lbs
DOB: 01/03/1971
DOB: 11/15/1980
CHARGE: CT I Failure to
CHARGE: Failure to
appear for possession w/
appear for theft
intent to deliver
property under $1500 controlled substance pg1
over 400g and CT II
2/more previous
failure to appear for
convictions
unlawful possess firearm

ED
T
S
E
R
AR

$300
REWARD

FOR INFORMATION LEADING TO THE ARREST OF COMAL

COUNTYS MOST WANTED. Callers will remain anonymous.

830.620.3400 - 24-Hour
830.620.3411 - Mon-Fri 8am to 5pm

The names listed have been released in accordance with the Texas Public Information Act. This is a true
and accurate account as of Monday, July 6,2015 at 10:11 a.m. and may not be current by the time it is read.
Do not try to apprehend anyone. These are listings of criminal warrants with the Comal County Sheriffs
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making an arrest. Any person is innocent of wrongdoing unless proven guilty in a court of law.

TXCITIZEN.COM

on Sports WITH BRANT FREEMAN

When does football start again?

I realize that might be the ultimate American

thing to say, but Im just so freaking bored
right now.
Dont get me wrong, there are plenty
of fascinating stories happening in sports,
things Ive touched upon before. The Houston
Astros resurgence as a franchise, supplanting
themselves as legitimate American League
contenders a full two years ahead of
schedule. Becky Hammons barrier-breaking
performance as head coach of the Spurs
Summer League team. Hammon and the Spurs
won the title in Vegas earlier this week, just
another notch on the off-season belt for San
Antonio after the Spurs signed free agents
LaMarcus Aldridge and David West along
with bringing back Kawhi Leonard, Danny
Green, Tim Duncan and Manu Ginobili (and
all far below market value). The drama of Dez
Bryant (would he be willing to miss games
without a new contract?) ended predictably:
he and the Dallas Cowboys finally agreed to
a long-term deal, ending their game of NFL
chicken moments before the deadline.
Im anxious to see if the Astros can keep
it up and reach the post-season for the first
time since their World Series trip in 2005.
Whats next for Hammon as she continues
to succeed in a male-dominated profession?
Will the Spurs be able to gel and make a run
for the title with their revamped roster? How
will Dez perform now that he got the money
he felt he deserved?
These are questions that will take some
time to be answered. Houstons race for the
AL West title, for example, wont get really
interesting until mid-to-late August. So right
now I just find myself yearning. For games.
With an odd-shaped ball.
Its funny because for the longest time in
my childhood, I was afraid of football. Growing
up in a Dallas Cowboys household, my dad
was lets say a little too invested in the game.
Cursing at officials, screaming at turnovers,
forecasts of losses after a bad play in the first
quarter, and this was all happening in the early

90s while the Cowboys were winning. For

10/11-year-old me: football = fear.
Things changed. As I got older, I suppose
I built a tolerance for my fathers ways and
used watching the game as a bonding
experience, eventually building my own
interest in the game (and eventually another
team. Go Titans! *throws up*).
Now Im fully immersed. Ive covered
high school football for over 10 years,
college football for over 12 years, and am a
proud subscriber of NFL Sunday Ticket. Thats
right, Ill spend my entire week covering and
reporting on football and on my one day
off, Ill subject myself to 9 more hours of it
on a Sunday. One day, producers of A&Es
Intervention will be in my home and Ill end
up in a resort in Phoenix in order to rid me of
my addiction. Can I watch the fourth quarter
before we leave for the airport?
I have been an NBA fan for 20 years,
but admittedly my interest will wane from timeto-time and I cant be bothered to watch preseason games. But with the NFL, youre damn
right Ill watch a meaningless game in August.
The NFL Network even made all pre-season
games available last year (you had to pay for
those games, and even I wouldnt do that. If
you did, then you should be on A&E first).
I will watch a 2-11 Rams team take on
the 3-10 Browns because football. I will not
do the same for baseball. What game is
on? The Mariners and Blue Jays? *changes
channel to HGTV*.
I could write about the Spurs in every
column, and I will be glued to the Astros as
they race towards the post-season. I have
enjoyed watching Becky Hammons journey
unfold and even watched quite a bit of
hockey this past post-season. But I still find
myself asking one question:
When does football start again?

Brant Freeman is a seasoned local sportscaster,

serving as the radio voice of Texas State University,
hosting television coverage of Texas State Athletics and
delivering the goods as a reporter for major pro and
collegiate sporting events in the greater San Antonio
area for over a decade.
11

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GUADACOMA@NBTX.COM

The SUN'S surface is 27 million degrees

Summer in Texas is nearly twice that hot

ASK A MEXICAN!

By Gustavo Arellano Chinese pogrom or a chino, chino, japons

schoolyard chant, the Asian presence in
Dear Mexican: Why is it so easy Mexico has never ended, joined in recent
to escape from Mexican prisons, and years by Korean migrants in Mexico City
why is it always accomplished the day and the continued takeover of Ensenada by
before execution? And why have not Chinese nationals (their presence in Mexicali,
the proper authorities figured it out on the other hand, dates back nearly a
yet? See Madero, Pancho Villa, Luis century). Not only that, dont forget that our
Terrazas, Jr., etc.
indigenous side came from Asia thousands
Fuga Frank
of years agoso dont be surprised when
your cousin grows up to look like a radiant
Dear Jailbreak Fred: Dont forget El
Burmese tribeswoman from a Cold WarChapo! The answer is obvious: Mexican law
era National Geographic spread instead
enforcement and government officials are
of however the hell a normal Mexican is
more easily bought than a piratera copy
supposed to aparecer.
of Star Wars: The Force Awakens at your
local Mexican supermarket parking lot. As
Dear Mexican: Im a residential
for Chapos already legendary escape, all I real estate guy, and this question
can add is that I still cant decide whether came up in my group recently. Why
Dig Dug or Super Mario Bros. is the more is it when Mexicans buy a house, one
hilarious meme for the situation. Oh, and fuck of the first things they do is put up
Mexican President Enrique Pea Nieto, that heavy shades, or even blankets, on all
pinche prieto cagaleche.
of the windows? Why dont they let

Dear Mexican: Im Mexican. I

dont mind when my friends ask
me questions about Mexicans. But
my Jew-wop friend asked me a
question about Mexicans that I dont
understand, and have no answer to.
He asked me why do some Mexican
chicks look Asian? Having grown up
in SanTana, I immediately thought
of the cholas and every Payasa,
Tweetie, and Shorty I knew and their
amazing skill with a liquid eyeliner.
Several Google searches did not yield
any good results. So neither of us
got the much-needed visual to help
us communicate. So, to reiterate
the original question: why do some
Mexican chicks look Asian? Is it the
make-up, his Jew-wop ignorance, or
something I am clearly missing?
La Sad Girl

the sun shine in?

Re/Max Ramn

Dear Wab: Three possibilities. The

most obvious is that Mexicans like their
privacy. If we want the world to see us,
we have no problem being outsidethats
why we have parties on the front lawn,
couches on the porch, and create gazebos
and benches for the outside. But once were
inside, we dont want metiches nosing
around into our activity.
That leads to the second posibilidad:
the house might be occupied by multiple
families, who do not want the outside
world to know that whats supposed to be a
bedroom is actually occupied by a family of
five. The least likely answer is also one that
all gabachos immediately assumethat its a
drop house for drugs. The only way to know
if that last thing is true? If its the one house
on the block that gabachos come in and out
Dear Pocha: What youre missing is that of. You know what to do
a chingo of chinitos are Mexicans. Asians
Ask the Mexican at
have been coming to Mexico since the
themexican@askamexican.net,
1500s, when Filipinos worked the Manila
be his fan on Facebook, follow him on
galleons that would unload in Acapulco and
Twitter @gustavoarellano or follow him
intermixed with the population in Guerrero,
on Instagram @gustavo_arellano!
Oaxaca, and beyond. And, give or take a
12

AD SALES 830.358.2493

L E G A L NO T I C ES

NOTICE ADVERTISING PUBLIC SALE OF

PROPERTY TO SATISFY LANDLORDS LIEN. A
sale to satisfy A. A. Aarons contractual Landlords
Liens will be held upon the following described
personal property presently located at A. A. Aarons
Mini-Storage, a self-service storage facility, in unit
no.s: B031 Ramona Perez, washer, fans, toys,
table, kitchen supplies, iron, clothing, AC unit, dryer,
home dcor, movies, shoes, boxes of misc. items;
A017 Justin Herber, sectional sofa, dolly, kids
bicycle, end tables, couches, bicycle, side tables,
kitchen supplies, tools, wire, boxes of misc. items;
C011 Cynthia Gomez, table, bike, exercise
equipment, Christmas decor, movies, rims, TV, golf
club, fans, chairs, weedeater, home dcor, pictures
frames, coolers, toolbox, fishing poles; (all
hereinafter referred to as the Property). The sale of
the Property will be by public sale and auction of
whole lots consisting of the entire contents of each
space to the highest bidder for cash to satisfy said
landlords lien, conducted at A. A. Aarons Mini
Storage, 1155 Loop 337, New Braunfels, Texas on
the 11th day of August, 2015 at 8:30 a.m.
NOTICE ADVERTISING PUBLIC SALE OF
PROPERTY TO SATISFY LANDLORDS LIEN. A
sale to satisfy AAA Mini-Storages contractual
Landlords Lien will be held upon the following
described personal property presently located at
AAA Mini-Storage, a self-service storage facility, in
unit no.s: B016 Josh Villarreal, bike, toolboxes,
extension cords, TVs, tools, cooler, ladder, chairs,
basketball hoop, toys, table saw, boxes of misc.
items; I037 Saundra Blaylock, TV, boxes of
clothing; suitcases, boxes of misc. items; C010
Margaret Deason, clothing, bedding, DVDs, china
hutch, misc. household items; C032 Brandon Clark,
small shop vac, large propane cylinder, yard tools,
fishing gear, sporting equipment; (all hereinafter
referred to as the Property). The sale of the
Property will be by public sale and auction of whole
lots consisting of the entire contents of each space
to the highest bidder for cash to satisfy said
landlords lien conducted at AAA Mini-Storage, 1375
Wald Road, New Braunfels, Texas on the on the 11th
day of August 2015 at 9:15 a.m.

the

new
KEEPIN' IT

PRICKLY PEAR

BAR

PRICKLY
SINCE
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thursday & saturday

Karaoke w/Johnny V!!!

friday

Dance Time With

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sunday

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monday

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NOTICE ADVERTISING PUBLIC SALE OF

PROPERTY TO SATISFY LANDLORDS LIEN. A
sale to satisfy Preferred Self Storages contractual
Landlords Liens will be held upon the following
described personal property presently located at
Preferred Self Storage, a self-service storage facility,
in unit no.s: 203 Leonardo Mata, table, CD player,
alarm clock, power tools, AC unit, shelving, cleaning
supplies, boxes of misc. items; 164 Gonzalo Paiz III,
tables, DVDs, couch, TV, hats, toys, cleaning
supplies, home dcor, desk, clothing; 132 Rudy
Reyna, washer & dryer, ladder, couch, barbeque pit,
yard tools, table/chairs, bedding, end tables, tools,
misc. household items; (all hereinafter referred to as
the Property). The sale of the Property will be by
public sale and auction of whole lots consisting of the
entire contents of each space to the highest bidder
for cash to satisfy said landlords lien conducted at
Preferred Self Storage, 267 Trade Center Dr., New
Braunfels, Texas 78130 on the on the 11th day of
August, 2015 at 10:00 a.m.
TXCITIZEN.COM

13

The TX Citizen, Callens Castle All-Abilities Park, and the New Braunfels Puppy Playland
want to thank the following for making Midway Madness a huge success:
gregersen
family
chiroprac tic

Cheese Chocolate Wine

New Braunfels
Vinyl Record Show

LONGSHOT
WINE

BAR

&

TASTING

ROOM

ART

And, of course, Le Strange Sideshow, the Frito-Pie eaters, and all of our rockin' volunteers!

We couldn't have done any of it without you!

14

TX CITIZEN
AD SALES 830.358.2493

Last Word
With Kelly Colby

On Minnesota

lives, loves, careers and problems of their

could see on the faces of both the concern

Theres really not much to say about own. Steve, having been some 2000 miles that this might be a final goodbye. Promises
Wisconsin. We stopped only overnight in away for years, feared that they might not were made to visit by both sides, glistening
a campground that was unattended. A sign
asked that you find a spot and leave your

for Minnesota.
The point of this trip was to allow my

your swimsuit purchase!

have time for him or that their lives might eyes in evidence. The world is a smaller place
have changed so much that they had no

than it was a generation ago, but a mile isnt

really any shorter, and good intentions often

money in a lockbox, indicating a level of connection to his any longer.
He neednt have worried; though, I think evaporate with other troubles, and we lose
trust beyond my imagining. It did work on
all
parents
do. His children were thrilled to touch with people for years at a time.
us though (yea for anarchy), and we spent a
pleasant eight hours there before heading out

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see him and spent every moment they could

173 S. Seguin St 830.214.0728

Steves never been much of one for

with him. Little league games and other plans outward expressions of emotion, so I often
simply offered more opportunities for his son got to see him suck up tears as best he

step-father, Steve, to see his children. One and daughter to invite him back into their could during these parting moments. The
lives in the western part of Minnesota and the lives, and with each chance to be with them, joy of his time in Minnesota was matched
other in South Dakota near Sioux Falls. We I saw him brighten.
In addition, this area was where Steve
stopped in Adrian, Minnesota, a small town

by the pain of his leaving. In the end he

hurried us all quickly into the truck to roll
away to our next adventure.

roughly equidistant from both, an hours drive

had grown up, and he had relations all

or so. In the end, we stayed in Minnesota for

around the area. He got the opportunity to

nearly a month.

reconnect with aunts, uncles and cousins, of the trip was, Steve said, not surprisingly,

I have more than a little to say about the

some long forgotten, others sorely missed.

When asked later what his favorite part

the time with his children. We all expected

area, but I thought it would be best to start And with all these people, Steve found this, and in fact, when Steve was asked
with a concluding thought before moving himself transported back in time. I could tell the question it was assumed that this was

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unquestionable, and the real question was

on to my standard political/libertarian

that while the years that had passed were

conclusions and mundane observations. In

clear, the emotions hadnt changed at all. (I what beside that time was his favorite.

Even so, perhaps its not so self-evident.

this case, that conclusion is one that is more should also point out that there is apparently
The
love
we have for people close to us can
nothing
like
the
welcoming
nature
of
the
emotional than rational.
This portion of the trip was distinctly Midwestern culture. I have seen Southern be both a blessing and a curse. There is little
Steves. There can be no question that he hospitality too, but never have I met a more question in my mind that who and how we
did, and will, enjoy other aspects of the trip approachable and friendly people than on love defines us as people; it makes us who
we are. But Im not sure that its true to say
as a whole. In fact, he had been promoting this portion of the trip.)
that it provides us with the greatest joy in our
But,
I
cant
just
leave
things
here.
I
the trip as a once in a lifetime adventure
long before we ever left. But, because this began by talking about the nature of and life, or if it does, perhaps we should also note
was an opportunity for him to reconnect with human feelings about mortality. They took that it also provides the greatest sorrow.
his children, and because of the stage he

a back seat to the joy Steve was having

What do I mean for people to take for all

finds himself in his life, this portion of the trip

during his time with his family, but as that

this? Nothing really. Nothing I say will change

overshadowed everything else for him.

time came to a close, the specter of death

the way that these encounters play out for you

returned in full form.

or anyone else. Steve wouldnt have traded

Theres a point in everyones life where

the idea of mortality falls into view. This lack

In our last few days of the stay in

this section of the trip for anything, and I have

of awareness is probably the most endearing Minnesota, Steve met with relatives whom he no doubt that he would do it all over again,
and frustrating thing about young people. knew he would never see again. An aging including the tearful partings, tomorrow. In
They usually retain this blissful ignorance a aunt who represented the closest connection the end, this will be the trip of a lifetime for
bit beyond their teens, but no one can hold

Steve had to his now dead parents hugged

visions of the Reaper off forever. This is him as she left the campground the day after
especially true when dealing with your own we had all participated in a family reunion. It
children, and in this case grandchildren.

was easy to see in Steves eyes that he knew

Steves children are grown now and

he would not see her again. Likewise in his

have children of their own. They have

last meetings with his son and daughter, I

TXCITIZEN.COM

Steve certainly, but I hope its not the last trip

in his lifetime where he gets to experience
these emotions.

You can read more from Kelly Colby at yourfirstshrug.

blogspot.com.

Est. 1986

NB's Largest Air-Conditioned Dance Floor!

Whats Going On...

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15

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