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us that 'paying back insult for insult and harm for harm is the only thing that balances.' At the same
time we are recommended to be very careful: 'Our dealings with our enemy should be considered
with more delicacy than our dealings with a friend.' Thus the law of an eye for an eye should not be
applied 'as long as there is a chance of meeting the enemy's revenge by kindness.'
And in general, Inayat Khan advises us that: Precautions must be taken that nobody should
become our enemy; and special care must be taken to keep a friend from turning into an enemy. It
is right by every means to forgive the enemy and to forget his enmity if he earnestly wishes it; and
to take the first step in establishing friendship, instead of withdrawing from it and still holding in the
mind the poison of the past, which is as bad as retaining an old disease in the system. This clearly
demonstrates the aspect of mental purification [.] as an essential aspect of inner life and mysticism.
In this way - and similarly in our other relationships - the correctly balanced reciprocity leads us to
begin to understand others better by placing ourselves in their position, by looking at things from
their point of view. Thus we can overcome exaggerated or imagined antagonisms in others and
develop forgiveness and sympathy. This will lead us to the second stage in moral evolution: the law
of beneficence, where man, recognizing himself as an entity separate from others and recognizing
others as distinct entities themselves, yet sees a cord of connection running through himself and all,
and finds himself as a dome in which rises an echo of good and evil; and in order to have a good
echo he gives good for good and good for evil.
Here, having begun to understand others and becoming conscious of how our relationships with
them function, we begin to see how our thoughts and feelings are reflected in the minds of other
people. And in the 'palace of mirrors' of the mind world, sooner or later, their echo returns to us.
Then our concern will be to radiate only loving and friendly feelings, so that these vibrations will
come back to us in the dome of the universe. This consciousness of the cord of connection running
through all seemingly separate beings leads to Inayat Khan's psychological advice - which pervades
the whole Sufi Message - always to focus our mind on the good side of things, situations and people.
This is neither blindness nor lack of insight; but it means that we choose consciously to which
impressions we give attention so that they can deepen and grow in our mind.
It is the attitude of seeing and not seeing, leading to a certain knowing innocence. Through this
attitude we can become master of our feelings and thoughts and in this way master of our life. For in
our experiences life gives us back what we create and radiate though our mind.
All this implies a very practical rule: to avoid judging and criticizing other people. We are always
strongly tempted to do this; our mind likes to analyze others from our own point of view; and then
we can feel that we are better. But in reality, by focussing our mind on weaknesses and shortcomings
in others, we tend to create or encourage these weaknesses in ourselves, and our relationship with
the person whom we criticize will be adversely affected by this. Untactful criticism can antagonize the
other person and will often make him or her defensive and will therefore strengthen his or her faults.
Even if we express our criticisms in his or her absence to a third person, it will influence our
relationships negatively.
Inayat Khan uses this approach to explain the meaning of Christ's saying: 'Resist not evil'. Evil
may be likened to fire. The nature of fire is to destroy everything that lies in its path, but although
the power of evil is as great as the power of fire, yet evil is also as weak as fire. For as fire does not
endure, so evil does not last. As fire destroys itself, so evil is its own destruction. Why is it said, do
not resist evil? Because resistance gives life to evil; non-resistance lets it burn itself out.
This means that we should not react in the same manner, with anger to anger. Although a
natural reaction, this implies that one allows oneself to be infected with the same mood, the same
evil so that it is allowed to spread and receives more nourishment. A chain reaction may then be the
result.
By avoiding this, by controlling one's reaction, one can stand like a rock in the sea. One need not
agree to the thoughts or wishes of the other; but by not allowing oneself to be influenced in one's
own heart by negative feelings, one is much more likely to find a harmonious solution or compromise
through inner strength and understanding.
Harmony should, however, always be seen in a sufficiently wide context: not only with the person
with whom we are in immediate contact, but also in relation to others who are involved, in relation to
a wider community and to our ideals.