Вы находитесь на странице: 1из 8

Official

I.A.T.S.E.
Best Boy’s Manual
LOCAL 80

copyright -1993, 1997, 2004, 2009 Help-u-Publications at cmhager.net


Foreword

Welcome!

If you are reading these words, chances are you have been selected as an I.A.T.S.E. Best
Boy!

By becoming a Best Boy, you have joined the ranks of thousands of others before you
belonging to this very special brotherhood. The position of Best Boy has its roots in
Hollywood’s historic past and, though some may perceive it as a somewhat demeaning name, the
title was originally bestowed on only one man in a company of men. A Best Boy demanded
respect because he was deemed “The Best of the Boys.”

We hope you enjoy your work. This manual was designed for easy reference to almost
any situation, clearly laying out what is and what is not expected from you, from responsibilities
to set etiquette.

Congratulations!
I.A.T.S.E.
OFFICIAL BEST BOY MANUAL

Table of Contents:

FOREWORD

ACKNOWLEDGEMENT
ANGER
ARRIVE LATE
BENEFITS
BEING THERE
DEPARTMENT HEADS
DESKS AND CHAIRS
DRINKING ON THE JOB
DRUGS
ELECTRICIANS
EQUIPMENT
EXPENDABLES
EXTRA HAMMERS
INTESTINAL GAS
LEAVING EARLY
LIGHTING
LOYALTY
PAY
PERSONAL PHONE CALLS
RESPECT
RESPONSIBILITIES
RIGGING GRIPS
SET ETIQUETTE
SUPPLIES
SWEARING
TIME KEEPING
TOOLS
YOUR KEY GRIP
ACKNOWLEDGMENT

See: Equipment, Expendables, Supplies.

ANGER

There are all sorts of reasons to get angry. Anger, as a rule, does not lead anywhere, and the
smart B.B. will avoid situations that may rile him. Avoid confrontation whenever possible.

There are certain situations when anger is appropriate, and that is when the Best Boy has
made a mistake. In this event, anger can be used to “mask” the screw up. For example, let’s
imagine a weary Best Boy rips a stolen golf cart through a $234,000 scenic backing, thereafter
careening into a case of 18k HMI globes. Momentarily regaining his senses he stumbles off,
leaving everything a shattered, useless heap on the floor. He shows up the next day drunk, late
for his call, unable to find the keys to the workbox or production trailer. If questioned by
anyone, the savvy Best Boy is advised to take a swing at the bastard and loudly accuse him of
boinking his wife.

ARRIVING LATE

It is nobody’s business when the Best Boy arrives.


See: Anger, Swearing.

BEING THERE

It is a physical law of the universe that no one can be in two places at one time.
That being said, Best Boys are universally capable of being anywhere, at any time. Nevertheless,
Best Boys shall not be made to appear at any specific time or place, or in any specific location,
stage, set, state of physical being-ness or dimension, regardless of the number therein, unless it
suits the particular whim or flight of fancy of said Best Boy.
See: Rigging grips

BENEFITS

There are many benefits to being Best Boy, foremost of which is Doing Time Cards. This is
perhaps the most important of the Best Boy’s job responsibilities and is not to be taken lightly.
Therefore, a Best Boy may spend up to 11/12’s of the day at this task (a twelve hour day), or
7/8’s of the work period (an 8 hour day) filling out time cards, with the appropriate amount of
time taken off for lunch. A Best Boy should NOT do timecards on his lunch break, as he needs
to attend to his nutritional or naptime needs.
Other benefits include leaving early, a slightly higher hourly wage, access to stolen or pilfered
materials, the hiring of friends, and the firing of rotten bastards who offend or otherwise
displease him.
DEPARTMENT HEADS

While working on a major lot, the Best Boy should stay on the good side of department heads,
although they should be careful not to blatantly lick their ass in public. Bribes and small gifts are
effective; groveling is disgusting and should only be used as a last resort.

DESK AND CHAIRS

All desks and chairs in the truck or stage are the exclusive property of the Best Boy,
regardless of who paid for, found, moved, borrowed, assembled, or otherwise stole them.

DRINKING ON THE JOB

A Best Boy most certainly may drink on the job.


See: Anger, Benefits, Swearing.

DRUGS

Many drugs are illegal.


Best Boys, however, are “above the law.” Understanding that as a simple yet sweeping truth,
it follows that a Best Boy’s drug habits and drug use are personal. A Best Boy may, if he so
desires, partake of any drug he chooses, be they pharmaceutical, street, prescription, over the
counter, or manufactured in the Best Boy’s own cluttered garage.

ELECTRICIANS

Electricians are an annoying yet necessary part of the business. The experienced Best Boy
will have little contact with them if he is doing his job correctly by arriving late, staying to
himself in his office or production vehicle, “going to the store,” or going home early.
Electricians make convenient scapegoats and for this reason should be treated with an
appropriate amount of insincere respect.

EQUIPMENT

Equipment is, unfortunately, part of the Best Boy’s responsibility. The quick-witted Best
Boy will find many ways of avoiding this part of the job, such as fixing blame for missing, lost,
or damaged equipment on others. See: Electricians, Extra Hammers
Additionally, the Best Boy need not find, procure, borrow, buy, rent, supply, polish, paint,
label, engrave, set up, rig, install, assemble, operate, service, clean, fix, count, verify, file, find,
or search for any equipment. He must, however, acknowledge the existence, use, or need for any
and all grip equipment. The Best Boy’s responsibility ends with this acknowledgement.
See: Expendables, Supplies.
EXPENDABLES

The Best Boy need not find, procure, borrow, buy, clean, set up, fix, polish, paint, label, rent,
install, count, verify, file, put away, look, or search for any expendables. He must, however,
acknowledge the existence, use, or need for any and all expendables. The Best Boy’s
responsibility ends with this acknowledgement.

EXTRA HAMMERS

It has been said that Extra Hammers are the backbone of the industry. While this may indeed
have an element of truth, they are also a dime a dozen. Your job as Best Boy is to break their
spirit, shatter their confidence, and destroy their friendship with the Key Grip.

INTESTINAL GAS

Some Best Boys have a problem with intestinal gas.


See: Set Etiquette

LEAVING EARLY

It is nobody’s business when the Best Boy leaves.


See: Anger, Benefits, Swearing.

LIGHTING

If the Best Boy is found helping with the lighting of the set, it can be assumed he is not doing
his job of filling out time cards and making sure his men get paid. The Best Boy is under no
obligation to help with set lighting.

LOYALTY

The Best Boy will remain loyal only to those who can further his survival or pleasure.
The basic tenet of the Best Boy is “fuck you and hooray for me.”

PAY

Best Boys should pursue higher pay and shorter hours for all.

PERSONAL PHONE CALLS

Personal phone calls are nobody’s fucking business.


See: Anger, Swearing.
RESPECT

The Best Boy shall determine to whom he wishes to show respect, and must not be held
accountable for signs of disrespect, regardless of mood, sobriety, station, time, dietary habits,
race, creed, or color.
See: Intestinal Gas.

RESPONSIBILITIES

The Best Boy shall act responsibly. Remember, this is only an act. The Best Boy who
actually carries out his responsibilities only makes it more difficult for all those following in his
footsteps.

RIGGING GRIPS
Rigging grips are an urban myth, about as likely to be spotted as pretty unicorns in frilly red
dresses, or sissy black Leprecons with shaved legs and pink thongs. If a set has been correctly or
expertly rigged, or in any way accomplished in advance of your shooting crew, the savvy Best
Boy is advised to suppress his boner and take full credit for a job well done. If anything is wrong
with the rig, blame should be dished appropriately toward the thong-wearing Leprecons or the
destructive hooves of the elusive unicorns and their miserable fucking ilk.

SET ETIQUETTE

While exposing unwashed genitalia to the company can be thrilling, it is not always
appreciated. Check with the Key Grip prior to any episodes of flashing, farting, nose picking, or
ripping the head from the sound mixer’s body and shitting down his neck. These actions are
commonly the domain of the Key, and while generally worthless as a three-legged ox, there is
little to be gained by stealing his thunder. Remain smug, knowing there will be plenty of
opportunities to covertly bury him down the road. Stay in the truck or office.

SUPPLIES

The Best Boy need not find, procure, borrow, buy, clean, set up, fix, polish, paint, label, rent,
install, count, verify, file, put away, look, or search for any supplies. He must, however,
acknowledge the existence, use, or need for any and all supplies. The Best Boy’s responsibility
ends with this acknowledgement.
See: Expendables, Equipment.

SWEARING

Swearing is part of the job; it goes with the territory. When in doubt, a simple “fuck you,”
“fuck off,” “fuck this,” or “fuck it” is appropriate and helpful in almost any situation.

TIME KEEPING

See: Benefits.
TOOLS

Tool\’tul\ n [ME. Fr. OE tol; akin to OE tawain to prepare for use


-more at TAW] 1 a: an instrument (as a hammer, or roach clip) used or worked by hand:
IMPLEMENT

YOUR KEY GRIP

Think of your Key Grip as a money tree. Nurture him, keeping him carefully watered,
exposing him both to sunshine as well as periods of darkness. Feed him lots of horseshit,
approaching him carefully when he is unaware to pick of his fruits. If he is unappreciative, steal
the bastard blind and slander his name far and wide. NEVER admit to mistakes or let him expect
too much of you. YOU are the Best Boy, and in reality, he works for you; he is your boy, your
slave, your impotent, slobbering, helpless eunuch, less even than the infected drippings from
your nose. Your job is to break him, reduce him to pulling hangers on a high, hot soundstage at
age 61, a bottle of cheap, bitter bourbon in the pocket of his filthy overalls. If you have a
responsibility (which you don’t) this is it. Collect your paycheck and go home quietly. Once
you have done this, you are truly a Best Boy.

Congratulations!

Вам также может понравиться