Anger runs thick in our blood, but it is still just anger.

It can be controlled, the same as any emotion,

just as long as you can find a way of releasing it positively. Otherwise, you will lose control, and rage
will take over; for rage has a mind of its own.

I do not dwell on the past. Understand this. What is done is done, and cannot be undone. The only
thing the past is good for is to learn from, and like all other sources of knowledge: one should never be
consumed by a single source. Look at the bible. There are billions of people all over the world that are
consumed by this single source of knowledge, and you see how corrosive it becomes within these
people. It completely strips their freedom, their will, and pursuit for knowledge of truth. Just a single
source. You may from time to time look in the eyes of another and get a sense reflecting their troubles
that they continue to dwell on. A single source that continues to repeat in segments of their memory...
And the problem is not them, but the problems themselves, and the solution. Problems will always
exist. That is why we exist: to solve these problems. For if we had no problems we would not have to
eat, not have to breathe, not have to search. These problems are the reason. Our minds are the
solution. Some people choose to continue to run from their problems, because they don't wish to use
their mind to solve these problems. Instead they use their mind to find ways for other's minds to solve
the problems for them. And therein lies the rub. They are losing their ability to solve their own
problems. Always searching for another to do it for them.
This will never work because every thing created has a purpose. Look at nature. Everything
the Earth creates has a purpose to solve a problem, to balance an extreme. Even our bodies work the
same way. We have these tiny cells that constantly flow through our blood that consume any parasites
(intruders) so that our chemical levels remain balanced. Every person has complete control over their
balance through what they consume. Our bodies take what we give it and attempt to synthesize it to
balance the problems it faces.
And that's the thing about problems: they don't go away until you solve them. I had a similar
conversation with a firend just recently where she was overwhelmed by all these problems that she was
facing. She was all worried and stressed because she was attempting to solve all of her problems at
once. This is not possible. Because as soon as she would start to dig into past problems, a new
problem would arise (whether it be something small like having to find something to eat, or something
bigger like her boyfriend cheating on her) and at this point she would be faced with a fork in the road
with both roads dirty and both leading to trouble. And that's just it, she should not attempt to choose
which path of trouble to walk down, she should clean up the problem so that the road is no longer dirty,
but clear. One by one she began to solve her current problems so that she was then capable of solving
her past ones. By doing this, she was able to no longer be consumed by worry or stress and in the
process learned from these problems of the past to use in the now.

The reason that I am capable of maintaining a near-constant state of serenity and happiness is
that I take nearly all my power and energy, and I focus it to solve my problems and to ensure, whenever
possible, to not create new problems for myself. In doing this, I've been able to direct my energy
toward helping others to solve their problems. I will never, by choice, solve someone else's problem.
That does not help them in any way, because if the problem were to arise again, they would still not
know how to solve it. They would only know how I solved it, and thus would struggle and become
overwhelmed when trying to do it themselves, because they don't have experience solving. I have seen
this happen far too often, and continue to. Every solution is unique and relies on the perspective of the
problem's owner in order to be attained.

With that said, I would like to help you solve your problems.

Love is strongest in its youth. It is this alone that brings most to a point of stress and ultimate
temporary disruption within our minds. Now don't read this the wrong way, I am in no way suggesting
that youthful love is foolish nor will it lead you down a road you do not wish to travel. Love is the only
truth we have, and when it is found, we must hold on to it with all that we have left. I have just seen so
many souls in a state of depression due to misguided or "lost" love; and in every instance, the result
was not due to one's actions, but rather their choices. Many times people choose to follow a path
without proper time to reason. But without reason we are sheep, and when we are sheep we are
shameful; for our choices no longer follow our will along the path of truth.

Sometimes the number of your problems may surpass your ability to solve them; which, in turn,
has taken away your reason. You have cornered yourself in a field of sheep. I believe that I may have
a solution to help you rip through your sheep skin, and break free through the mental fence you have
created that has allowed the authoritative shepherds to control your path.

You cannot escape your problems no matter how fast you run or how cleverly you dodge them.
Attached I've provided some words that have inspired me, and some words that have inspired others.
Combined, I call it The V Remedy. Use them to reflect, inner deep, and in your sleep.
“Life's like a ride in an amusement park; and when you go on it you think it's real,
because that's how powerful our minds are. And the ride goes up and down and 'round
and 'round. It has thrills, and chills, and it's very brightly colored. And it's very loud,
and it's fun for a while. Some have been on the ride for a long time and they begin to
question, 'is this real, or is it just a ride?' And other people have remembered, and they
come back to us and they say, 'hey, don't worry, don't be afraid ever. 'Cause this is just a
ride.' And we kill those people, 'Shut him up, I've got a lot invested in this ride, Shut
him up!' Look at my furrows of worry. Look at my big bank account and my family.
This has to be real... It's just a ride ... But we'll kill those good guys that try and tell us
that, you ever notice that? And let the daemons run em up; but it doesn't matter, 'cause
it's just a ride and we can change it anytime we want. It's only a choice, no effort, no
work, no job, no savings of money, just a choice right now: between fear...and love.”
- Bill Hicks -

"A human being is part of a whole, called by us the "Universe," a part limited in
time and space.
He experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings, as something separated from
the rest--a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness.
This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and
to affection for a few persons nearest us.
Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circles of
compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty."
- Einstein -
An Alchemist In View, In Heart, And With You

Do good, and good gives

Act in vain, and vain remains
Follow your path through word of heart
Listen to the wind with Love within
Seek out the soul you feel from without
Find the treasure you dream about
With heart in hand you'll always stand
Else God has for you yet another plan

Watch for signs that fall in your stead

Tie to those, the dreams in your head
When a connection prevails and all is told
You will finally know the Soul of the World

'O Philosopher's Stone, Elixer of Life,

Guide me through eternal strife
Through clouds above, beyond the Sun
Through waves in space to where it all begun
Then with mind in view, and Love so true
Melt with me and all who knew
For One is All, and All is You
Love projected, combined, and reused.

A few excerpts from Hermann Hesse's: The Glass Bead Game.

The main character, Joseph Knect, is explaining an experience he coins an "awakening" --

"My life, as I saw it, was to be a transcendence, a progress from step to step, a series of
realms to be traversed and left behind one after another, just as a piece of music perfects,
completes and leaves behind theme after theme, tempo after tempo, never tired, never
sleeping, always aware and always perfect in the present. I had noticed that, coincidental
with the experience of awakening, there actually were such steps and realms, and that each
time a life stage was coming to an end it was fraught with decay and desire for death before
leading to a new realm, and awakening and to a new beginning." -- p. 359

An invocation of meditation:

"Look at that cloud landscape dappling the heavens. At the first glimpse one might think
that the depth was there where it is darkest, but one sees at once that those soft dark patches
are only clouds, that space with all its profundity first begins beyond the borders and fjords
of that cloud-mountain and sinks into infinity where the stars reign supreme--those grand
and highest symbols of clarity and order for us humans. It is not there in the clouds and in
the darkness that the depths of the world and its secrets reside, but in the open and the
serene. I implore you, before you go to bed stay and look for a while at these bights and
narrows with their host of stars, and do not thrust aside the thoughts and dreams that they
may inspire in you."
Continuous Infinity

I must take you through a journey of segmented time

A journey of love through the force of attraction
A colorless wheel of magnetic incision
Through scalar wave electrostatic potential
And geometric fallacies of perplexed proportions
Where calculus has been created to stupify the people
And hexagonal matrices form through the steeple
And dominatrix priests heard the poor little sheep
Through eyes sought dim in blinding light
And heads shaken deep from the blinding sight

The world needs love not hatred and races

It needs to be stripped of all ill seeded “natures”
Replaced by antithisizing synonyms and pure bred rhythms
Of vibrating waves of time manifesting thoughts divine
As kindred spirits consume the vast of the lost past
And the found future of forgotten fate
Brings humanity together for the final frontier
For hope is not a delusion but the last remaining tool
The final days are always churning for the nearest present moment
To create the movement to abyss and end the universes' struggle
For the life of a 'verse is as short lived as humanity's curse.

Conquer yourself from within as without

Consume all perspectives as they come about
Reject all assumptions and accusations
Forget me not for my clairvoyant thought
Regret not for all done distraught
Refuse control of intolerant power (mongering tyrants)
Replenish this 'verse with fluids unearthed
Recreate all souls lost or forgot
Relive all those that thought were not
Become all with all to come
Truth means truth
Love is all
Continuous Infinity
Ultimate Perspective

You must excuse my language, it runs in me deep

As I know too many words for most people respective
So I dumb down what I say and the words that I speak
So that you understand through me the ultimate perspective

Too many men held down by misunderstood translation

Too many women lost in a world undertaken
Too many children confused and alarmed
Too many souls forgotten and harmed
Too many teachers know little of Earth's creatures
Too many times have those forgot about rhyme
Too many minds have lost the divine
Too many crimes with too little certainty
Too many dimes with not enough charity
Too many rifts and not enough gifts
Too few cares for so many out there

Life is lost lived by all our abuses

Look at me not in majestic nature
I seek not to analyze and rate ya
Love is pulsed in airs reversed
Traversed in time through eyes intertwined
Translated in reflection as we consume perfection
Sensations reparations and remorseful presentation
Brings us to our state and ultimate trait
Our lives depend on minds and what's hidden in rhyme
So reread and reread and heed my mind's vines.

------------------------------------------------
Sublime unfurled in the ultimate swirl
Live or obliterate
Comparisons are odious
Precision through vision
Dreamnify
I speak not lies
------------------------------------------------
Own Thy Own Mind

Truth is the root

There's evil within
Blasphemy's sin
Yet priest akin
Bible's stories sour
Ill-written blasphemy's hour
From Kings shape
The unnatural grape
Unnecessary hate
Carried through veins
Uttered in trains
Displayed in pain
Reflected insane
Perspective remains
Tools retrace
People deface
Roots of race
Rich calcitrate
Poor sacrifice
Needs' price
Fixed omniscience
False pretenses
Happy hour
Godly devour
Void consume
Forgotten commune
Untold sold
And now priceless prevails
The worlds bottom breeds the worlds jail
While the top enjoy a never ending bail.

Release temptation before temptation prevails

Own thy own mind.

The Confusion Bubble

Confusion is one factor of life that I have yet to grasp. Although I find myself in a constant state
of confusion, I cannot seem to see its meaning or purpose. Personally I don't think there really is
a meaning or purpose; but rather simply exists to torment and disrupt the minds of innocent
people, like myself. To better explain myself, let me describe confusion in a more elaborate
manner. Think of confusion as a bubble. The bottle of soap symbolizes a container of potential
problems of future and past. The stick represents the body and mind as it is dipped into the
convoluted liquid of emotional conflict. As the stick emerges from the vast container of
complexity, subtle clarity exists, however, contains something unknown and unwanted. The
translucent substance glistens through the whole of the stick; thickening and mystifying upon
heavier light. Slowly air is blown upon the mystic liquid as the emotions become more powerful
and problems more obvious. All issues form at once as the bubble completes its perfectionist
sphere. Its contents now leaving the body creating a visual perplexity; hovering over the
individual and causing the mind to be absent from the body. Only with the right reflection of light
can the bubble be seen by others, but the creator's fixation causes a continuous sight of the bubble
as it travels through the air. Eventually the bubble pops, releasing all tensions and solving all
problems; only to be replaced by another forming bubble from the metaphoric stick dipped into a
seeming eternal liquid of bewilderment. This is my current feeling of confusion. For when the
bubble pops there is a moment of peace and assurance of future clarity. Of course, some bubbles
never pop, symbolizing confusing issues that continually persist, only to be lost or forgotten. It
seems that confusion, like all emotions, is not to be explained but rather experienced. And
through experience, we learn to take control over the bubble. We create its size and condition
with either a soft or powerful breath. A bubble eventually becomes something of importance and
usefulness, as confusion intrigues the mind rather than disrupting it. It is this that I have yet to
experience.

Enthusiasm

The word "enthusiasm" comes from the Greek entheos, which means literally, "the god
within." I really like that definition. I doubt it's possible to master the art of time
management if you aren't gushingly enthusiastic about what you're going to do with
your time. Go after what really inspires you. Don't chase money. Chase your passion. If
you aren't enthusiastic about your work, then you're wasting your life. Switch to
something else. Consider a new career altogether. Don't beat yourself up if your current
career has become stale. Remember that failure is your friend. Listen to that god within
you, and switch to something that excites you once again. The worst waste of time is
doing something that doesn't make you happy. Your work should serve your life, not the
other way around.

--Steve Pavlina

A Final Note

"As you make your moves, whatever they are, you need someone who trusts in you to find your
way, even when you are lost. You will need someone who wants to follow you and your path no
matter how rocky or hard it may be...only because it is your path and they need and want to be on
it with you - wherever it leads.

There are so many definitions of love ( what is a feeling anyway ? ) but one I have thought says a
lot is that love is a condition in which another's concerns are above your own.

And therein lies the rub. What we really want is our life, our futures, our being to be the essence
of those we love. And so we chase them, to prove to them they are right, that they deserve
us...and we deserve them."

-- Words of the wise.

This by far my favorite excerpt from Herman Hesse's, Magister Ludi(Das

Glasperlenspiel). In the following quote the word Castalia refers to a province composed
of super elite scholars; people devoted to truth and spirit. Waldzell refers to the actual
campus for these scholars. The main character, Joseph Knecht, is conversing with a
fellow friend from the outside world, whom has become distraught with his life and
misguidance. Joseph is providing his esteemed friend with some advice about life and the
pursuit of serenity:

"'I should like to talk to you about serenity--that of the stars and the spirit, and also about
our own particular Castalian serenity. You have an aversion to it, probably because you
have been obliged to follow the path of sadness and because now all sunniness and
geniality, our Castalian brand especially, seem to you shallow and childish--cowardly
too--and seem to constitute a flight from the terrors and the abysmal truths of reality into
a clear well-ordered world of pure pattern and formulas, of pure abstractions and
refinements. But, my dear mournful one, even though this flight exists, and even though
there may be Castalians who are cowardly and timorous and who play with formulas,
even though this should apply to the majority of us, it does not contradict the serenity of
the heavens and the spirit, and does not detract from their value and splendour. The easily
content and pseudo-serene among us can be opposed by others--men and generations of
men for whom serenity was not merely a superficial game but a serious and deep
preoccupation. I have known one of them. He was our former music master, whom you
saw from time to time at Waldzell, a man who in the latter years of his life possessed this
virtue to such a degree that ti radiated from him like light from the sun, that it flooded
everything and was reflected in everyone--as benevolence, love of life, good temper,
confidence and reliability--who accepted and absorbed its glow seriously.

'I, too, was illuminated by this light, and partook to some small measure of his sunniness
and the warmth from his glowing heart... To achieve this serenity is my highest and
noblest aim, and also that of many others: you will find it very often among the Fathers
of our Order. This serenity is neither a pose nor self-complacency but the highest
knowledge and love, the acceptance of all truth, the awareness at the edge of all depths
and abysses, the virtue of the Saint and the Knight. It is imperturbable and increases with
age and the approach of death; it is the secret of all beauty, and the quintessence of all art.
The poet who, in the dancing metre of his verses, praises the glorious and the terrible in
life, the musician who lets it ring as pure Present, are both bringers of light, spreading joy
and brightness upon earth, even though at first they may lead us through tears and painful
tension. The poet whose verses enchant us may be a sad recluse, and the musician a
melancholy dreamer, but their work also has a part in the serenity of God and the stars.
What they give us is no more than their somberness, sorrow or fear, but it is a drop of the
pure light of Eternal Serenity. When, too, whole peoples and languages seek to plumb the
depths of the world by means of myths, cosmogonies and religions, their highest
achievement is this serenity. Think for one moment of the ancient Indians of whom our
teacher at Waldzell often told us: they were people of suffering, reflection, penance and
ascesis, but the ultimate fund of their spirit was light and serenity--serene the smile of the
world conqueror and the Buddha, serene the figures of their eschatological mythologies.
The world, as their myths portray it, was in the beginning divine, radiant and happy,
beautiful as spring--a golden age. But suddenly it grows sick and begins to degenerate,
becomes more and more coarsened and wretched, until finally, at the end of four ever
declining aeons, it is ripe to be stamped underfoot and destroyed by the dancing feet of
Shiva. That is not the end of the world, however. It begins anew with the smile of the
dreaming Vishnu who, with his playing hand, creates a new, young, beautiful and radiant
world. It is truly marvelous: these people, discerning and capable of suffering as hardly
any other, looked upon the gruesome game of world history with horror and shame--the
ever-turning wheel of lust and suffering. They saw and understood the decay of creation,
the lust and devilry of man and simultaneously his deep longing for purity and harmony,
and discovered this glorious allegory for the whole beauty and tragedy of creation--the
aeons and the decline of creation, the powerful Shiva who tramples the putrefying world
to pulp and the laughing Vishnu who lies in slumber and allows a new world to be born
of his divine golden dreams.

'Now as regards our Castalian serenity, it may be only a small and late variety of this
great one, but it is entirely legitimate. Scholarship has not always and everywhere been
serene--as of course it should have been. With us it is the cult of truth closely bound up
with the cult of the beautiful and, in addition to this, with the contemplative care of the
spirit, and thus can never entirely lose its serenity; but our Bead Game unites within itself
all three of these principles--science, reverence of the beautiful and meditation. Thus, a
true bead-player should be permeated with serenity like a ripe fruit with sweet juices, and
above all should possess the serenity of music, which is naught else but courage--a
serene, smiling, striding and dancing amidst the terrors and flames of the world, the
festive offering of a sacrifice.
'...But you must not retire to sleep without first hearing a little music. A glance at the stars
and a little sweet music are better than all your sleeping draughts.'
Knecht sat down and played softly and gently. He played a phrase from that Purcell
sonata ... The notes fell like golden drops of light in the silence of the room, so gently
that the murmur of the fountain in the courtyard could still be heard. The voices of the
beautiful music met and merged--gentle and powerful, chaste and sweet. Courageously
and serenely, they strode in their innermost ranks through the void of time and the
transitory, making space and the night hour, while they lasted, enduring and cosmic..." -
pp. 285-288, [The Glass Bead Game], Herman Hesse